I'm doing the same for *GROWN* BLAQ introverts (Ours has nothing to do with being 'shy' or socially awkward or admiring females like summerwalker, 😂) -- but whatEVER the motivation, I love that you TOOK ACTION and paved your own way with an open invite to build a *community* of likeminded girls who DON'T have an outlet. I'm proud of you for diving into it and BUILDING the space that you needed to see!
This right here is exactly why I created the channel! I just knew that I couldn’t be alone when it came to the struggles that introverted black girls go through. To be a voice and to let other girls like us know that it’s ok to be who we are, to be confident in who we are 👏🏽🙌🏽🥹🥰
@@alanduff1054 Then it’s a good thing I didn’t leave MY sentiments to micromanage what YOU think about what this young lady (or I) meant. 😏😂 Nice try tho, karrin.😷👍🏽 I know you can’t help but to po’leece BLAQ women’s sentiments 🤭
@@alanduff1054 it does because black women specifically are expected to be loud and outgoing, and when we are quiet and stay to ourselves we are seen as stuck up . This is done to us by all races and is especially bad in the workplace or academic setting.
Soo true…I’ve noticed ppl take a disliking to me because I’m a black female introvert. But, if I were white or Asian I would be given the grace to be an introvert. It really is a tired racial stereotype
I know right!!! Society thinks that all black women act the same, like NO! We all have different personalities, including being an introvert, just like everyone else. Tired of people saying that I have an attitude just because I’m quiet 🤫 😪 it makes me sad 😔 sometimes
I'm an introvert. And I feel like if more people minded their business there would be less crime. Introverts have no energy for drama. You don't know how many times I've walked away from ppl while they were still talking
Being an introverted black woman with a lighter voice has been a terrible experience for me. Years of being bullied, even into adulthood. The amount of aggression I've been met with as soon as I speak is...beyond crazy. I've been yelled at by so many strangers in public and over the phone. I've been treated like I'm being sneaky or plotting at work. It honestly hasn't...been a happy life. I genuinely feel like I don't fit into my own life, like there is no place for me. When I meet other shy black girls, I think they're cute. I feel a need to protect them; I don't immediately think to tear them down.
Yes I agree that more introverted women have to stick together! It definitely gives a sense of relieve and gives us more confidence to be who we are when we have people who understand us
I definitely relate so much. I'm often taken back and left feeling confused because my brain is not wired to where I think to purposely offend or be rude and disrespectful to anyone, especially unprovoked. I even feel bad when I go off on people even when my actions are necessary. I just don't like hurting people even those who hurt me. That's why I don't understand how some people can literally not care how they treat people but yet I care so strongly. I get no joy out of hurting others, so I don't understand how some people find comfort in being assholes to others.
It intimidates people because they don’t know what you’re thinking. You’re a mystery and they don’t take the time to get to know you & they don’t trust it.
It's so weird! People put all kinds of negative narratives on us introverted black women. I deal with the same thing you discussed . People are big mad when you mind your own business. So many people at my job hate me it's crazy! I can barely get myself to go to work due to the toxicity I've experienced at my job. I'm burnt out! My battery needs to be recharged. Sadly, I experienced toxicity from black men, women, and all other races! Thank you for your video.
You’re welcome lovely! Yes I feel you on the co workers! The same thing happened to me and I would be frustrated because, the reason they don’t like me is because I’m quiet. Never made sense to me, it’s hurtful sometimes
I so understand you as an introverted black woman who unfortunately has a resting b..t..h face while I am lost in my own thoughts/head. I would recommended reading about the MBTI and enneagram system to better understand yourself and how you tick. The more you understand all aspects of yourself, the more compassion you will develop for yourself especially in light of the toxicity of others and that quiet self love will see you through and eventually attract people to your calming spirit.
YES... Dealing with the bullying from BM who make it a special mission to try to interfere with my peace by making their presence known in the most obnoxious ways.
I thought this was just me, people are weird. I now look at it like this, the people who think quiet people are stuck up,are the ones with the problem. They will never know peace because they are very judgmental and not content with their own solitude.
I'm introverted. I'm get drained easily. I love my alone time, but I also love being social with people who I can be vulnerable with. I also have a short fuse, so being around a crowd is not always best for me....I love my quiet time. I love to pray, meditate, do yoga, listen to soulful music and love on those who truly hold space for me...Too often I am judged and mistreated because I don't fit the stereotype. I'm introverted with some extroverted tendencies, but 9 out of 10 times I'm quiet....I have to feel SAFE to let people in...I don't like surface bullshit...it's a waste of time to me.
I understand you 1000% 👏🏽 just want to be around people you can be vulnerable with and are GENUINE 🥰 it’s sometimes hard to find genuine people to have in your corner. That’s why I like to observe people before I try to get to know them.
I've been dealing with this for years and I'm an older black woman and it never changes... Black people are the most reactive to us introverts I've been harassed..Yes no one says anything about quiet white people but a quiet black woman "say what!!" .
It really upsets people when you are quiet and black people REALLY get upset by it.. I've had black coworkers like come at me hard as if I'd done something to them all because I am quiet and a loner.. but as I get older I care less about what people think
I’m not trying to judge just trying to throw to you what I know. I noticed you said you love to pray and do yoga . I recently learned that yoga is demonic ( the poses and hand gestures) . I advise looking into it I learned I was doing an abomination to the MOST HIGH . All love sis 🩷
I'm a gay and black introvert and people can't take that I don't want to spill tea or kiki with them 😂 ESPECIALLY at work omg....I'm also perceived as standoffish and stuck up because I mind my business and don't share any of mine. People get pissed because they feel privileged to our energy before they even get to know us as a person and then they hit what I call the "wall".
People want us to be the entertainment or get tf out of their face. We can’t be quiet, shy, introverted, silly, scared, happy, or funny unless someone is profiting from it.
I am a black woman who is 30 and introverted. People think just because I am quiet and always wanting to be alone that I am either mad, mean, or dislike them. None of this stuff is true. I have been this way since I was a child. I like minding my own business, not gossiping about others, and doing my own work and leaving with my check. I hate how people think just because your a black woman your going too; talk a lot, stand up for everyone, get loud, complain etc... I just don't care for all that. Black people even give me a hard time, black men ignore me and stare at me like it's weird that I am speechless. I can't get a date with a black man, they seem to like the stereotypical black woman named shaniqua.
Most people’s lives - especially extroverts’ and women’s - consist of other people’s business and being accepted by other people. This is why they can’t handle those of us who aren’t always talking, gossiping or trying to be accepted by them. I am older and I retired a year ago. Since then, I have really enjoyed not having to deal with all of the overly talkative and social co-workers who used to always try to get me to talk just for the sake of talking, just because they can’t handle silence.
Thank you for this platform! Yes as a black women who’s introverted we’re often misunderstood. I’m a friendly person but I don’t care to be everyone’s space all day. I’ve experienced a lot difficulties in the workplace because of my personality. I’ve been targeted and ostracized because being an introvert. I’m finally feeling comfortable in my skin. I am who I am. Thank you for being a voice!
Of course!!!! 😍😍😍😍 I will continue to be a voice for all us. People make it so hard for us introverted girlies to be ourselves. The negative stereotypes have to stop
Gosh I thought I was the only one, I’ve been accused of being proud, unsocial and unapproachable and I’m like why do you care? Black women need to start understanding and empathising with each other. It’s really sad. I’m an introvert and my friends always try to change me like there’s something wrong with me, I don’t gossip, I’m not rude, I’m friendly when I need to be, why do they think they have to change it?
Sounds like those aren't real friends tbh. If they really care for you, they wouldn't be so pressed to change who you are as a person. Why can't people just accept the fact that introverted black women exist too?
They cant figure us out...but they crave to label us so bad and when youre a bw introvert they cant fathom not being able to put you in a specific box or the one they think you should be in..Keep up the good work ladies
Good for you. Now you can enjoy life on your own terms. I wasted so much time trying to mold myself into what I never will be. The sooner one learns it’s perfectly fine to be who you are, the better.
I thought it was only me. My ex-husband’s family used to make comments like “I thought I was too good, or stuck up” just because I’m introverted. It used to hurt me that they couldn’t see or respect that I’m just quiet.
50yo introvert who only learned of such a thing a few years ago. I'm so glad to finally put a title to it because I can totally stop beating myself up for being who I am and stop forcing myself to be something that I am not.
I always get the resting B face comment but it’s because I’m usually deep in thought about a million things 😂. Say one word to me and I’m smiling and talking and engaged, lol and the “omg you’re so sweet!!” Follows all the time Like yeah, I’m just chill. Lol. I don’t like loud places for hours (clubs), I prefer meaningful convo over forced, etc etc. The pandemic really showed me how miserable people are because they can’t sit alone with themselves for long periods of time without getting depressed 😵💫😵💫😵💫. I couldn’t imagine 😂 Great video! Happy to have come across this video 🎉
I'm a black man who was just strolling through and seen this. I'm about 3 minutes into your conversation and already I can tell I like where you going with this. The way you describe yourself and to all the women out there like you, y'all are a breath of fresh air. A dream come true, no cap! God knows I wish I could have the pleasure of meeting someone like you. I also tend to roll solo. I just focus on my relationship with God, weight training, my income and staying away from chaos and renewing my mind to be the best man I can be for me and whoever the woman maybe that will enter my life. I support you sister ✊💯
You know what is crazy? Ppl just expect black women to be extroverted. When we quiet, its "you got an attitude, whats wrong, and all this" but let is be asian, then its "awww, she shy, she cute" idc anymore about seeming antisocial, i ain't gonna burn my fuse for everyone. Extroverts need to learn to make space for us.
Hello fellow Black introverts, I've read thru most of the comments and listened to the video. WE R ALL EXPERIENCING THE SAME EXACT THINGS!! 😮😮 Does anyone have any tips for finding work from home jobs or 'out in the field' type jobs?? BCUZ I'M SICK OF NASTY OFFICE GOSSIPY, TWO FACED, BULLY CULTURE! I wish I had the skills to be a digital nomad. Maybe that's something I will have to work towards; a goal. Bcuz life is too short for this office drama sh#t!
Sometimes I just don’t want to talk and I’m in my thoughts and I like to observe things and people. When you observe you see everything clearly. And I just love being alone in my own company, it’s refreshing. I get drained easily when I’m around other people I don’t feel comfortable or safe with.
I feel you on the pressure it felt to be really social in high school. I feel like I’m a black girl ambivert. I have moments where I love to be a social butterfly and thrive off of being surrounded by others. Then I also have my moments where I love to disappear off of social media, group chats, and other distractions to have complete isolation and recharge. It confuses people that are trying to get to know me when they see me being social and at every function then see me shutting down for a couple of weeks. They always think something bad happened to when really this is just normal for me.
People are so use to picking at the person they truly wish they could become and find it easier to misdirect/project their insecurities onto others than deal with the battle within or try to be nice 😒 However it is brave to show up authentically as self! Black Girls: you are loved Black Women: you are cherished! I thank you for being you 🤍
This has been me my entire life. Ostracized and bullied by other races, including our own because I'm quiet, lack a blaccent, and don't act like the ghetto stereotype everyone likes to be comfortable with and laugh at. It's crazy because when we act like our authentic introverted selves it makes people angry and uncomfortable. If we are the stereotype it makes people angry and uncomfortable. It's sad that how no matter what we do, what we say, or how we act, we lose..😔
I am an introverted black girl too - and I find that it can be hard to get along with even other black people (since everyone talks a lot). Anyway, I find a lot of peace in being myself, and I think this video from you is much needed.
I hate when people say “you’re too good.” Not everyone has to hang around them. More importantly, the introvert has to think they’re better than everyone.
I’m highly sensitive, introverted black woman who is an INFP and I love this whole video. I used to think that something was wrong with me until I discovered all these things about me and met others who share similar experiences. I used to get bullied a lot for being shy and quiet (also for being neurodivergent), and I thought there was something wrong with me because of it. I spent more of my time drawing, writing, and in my thoughts than I did socializing or making friends. I would also get jealous of my sisters and my cousin for being more sociable and having more friends than I did, but I later learned to accept who I am. Glad you made this video, you’re voice is pretty, and hope this gets more attention ❤
Your comment literally described me all the way down to being bullied and being jealous of my friends because they were more extroverted than I was! But I’m so happy to know that you accepted yourself for who you are on the inside and out because that’s all that matters 👏🏽 I think that it’s so cool that you know how to draw ✍🏽 (wish I had that talent lol)
6:54 My exact same sentiment. Every time I tried to “fit in” and be more outgoing just to please others and feel more accepted it always backfires. So I have now come to a place where I have accepted who I am as an Introvert and I will live my life in a way that suits me and not care how others may perceive me. Those who are meant to be in my life will naturally gravitate toward me and vice versa.
I dont know who originally said it, but this quote puts a lot into perspective for me: people who want to be left alone will always be overtaken by the people who want power. So if you're someone who generally desires to be left alone to do your thing (introvert, libertarian, free-spirit, etc), it's important to cultivate your power to keep the narcs and vampires away, and vet each and every person who gets to have access to you.
Quiet and mostly to myself is a no no at the workplace. You'll be seen as suspicious, untrustworthy, and full of yourself. There's a psychology behind people being uncomfortable around the quiet. People need to understand this and learn how to play the game to make your life easier. Don't play the game the consequences are bountiful and predictable. Ever heard the saying the emptiest vessels make the most noise? It can be used to explain how loudmouths aren't saying anything. Yet most trust the loudmouths. We know what they are thinking because they are always talking $h!t and that makes us feel comfortable. So, what do you do in a work situation for example? If you choose to stay quiet the consequences will come and can lead to being fired in some instances. To play the game just requires you to stop not talking to people. Stop buy say a few words and keep it pushing. You don't have to gossip just don't sit off in corners isolating yourself. Go to work play the game go home and decompress. This is for your paycheck. As for other situations if you want to go off into a corner and the only consequences are social then fine. But for the paycheck....play that game until you've started your own company and can do what you want. Again, obviously how people are reacting to quiet people is the issue and not the quiet person. But if you understand and can predict human behaviour you need to make it work for you by acting accordingly to get the desired results.
I can definitely relate to this. Everyone thinks I’m mean or stuck up. Im learning to love me. I’m just quite. I hate having to explain I’m not weird I just speak when I have something to say. It’s exhausting. Nice to know I’m not alone
The worst part for me is the workplace. I hate work meetings and now I have a new job that requires that I give weekly presentations. I really want to change careers and work with computers but I just got this new promotion at the office job. Not to mention my boss is an outspoken black woman and often looks at me like I'm an alien. She even said I was acting a little standoffish and timid when working with a client. This job is very hard for me because of my introversion but I can't leave right now 🙄
Hey I’m so sorry about that, I know it’s gotta be tough 😢 having to do weekly presentations sounds like a lot and scary! But just know that you got this! You deserve that promotion and you’re gonna kill those presentations 👏🏽 In the meantime, you WILL find a career that best suits you 🧡 it will all be worth it
I love this discussion because I definitely feel a shift change when people realize that I am introverted and or reserved and I’m pretty non judge mental so it’s definitely eye-opening to see how other people show up and it just let me know I would rather not be around that type of energy❤
People are entertained and comfort by stereotypical black women. When people can across an introvert black woman, they feel cheated out of that entertainment and comfort.
I think the attitude and resent you are getting is because introverts usually have alot to to give and other people want some of it. Also, people who are not content within themselves are angry that you CAN be so comfortable within yourself. It's all stemming from self-serving and jealousy
That’s what I am slowly learning to understand at this point! A lot of people can’t stand to be alone and feel that they are unworthy. You’re right, the envy people have towards us is ridiculous 😒 Being able to be by ourselves and not care what people think is such a power move 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I feel so seen! Society thrives off of insecurities and people are wayyy too consumed with the surface level foolishness, Im falling in love with this aspect of me because not everyone who approaches is genuine sending love to all Intros bc we are more important than we’re treated ❤
The thing is you have to bring the pain to people who try to take your peace from you. I have three modes, Indifferent, loving and to hell I will send thee. Once they know you will take it there, they scatter like the bugs they are.
So relatable. I feel the same when at work. I find it real difficult to “make friends” because I have a hard time just being outgoing or making small talk. I’ve never been that type to strike up a conversation out of no where.. it just doesn’t come naturally to me. But I will say hello or give a true compliment. I think introverts are feelers and we navigate the world on a deeper level and are careful with our energy. Extroverts just dont get it and think we are weird and antisocial. Ugh… its just who we are.
The stories people make up around you so that they could feel better in where to place you in their head is outstanding. At my old (and first) job I had a manger tell me that people don’t pick on me because they think I’d kill somebody which was funny at first bc it sounded foolish and so far left but then I started to feel some type of way about it bc I literally don’t do anything to anyone to warrant something dumb asf like that. I’ve really grown to love this aspect of myself though, I find so much power in not letting people know my every thought 😂
Anyways I’m thankful for this trait bc it really weeds out the people who don’t need access to you and helped me even form really good bonds with people I actually want around.
I understand exactly how you feel! I’ve had someone at work say that that I look like I would kill someone too 😂 but in reality I’m just chillin 😎 I’m trying every day not to take things so personal. So far so good! I love that you find power in it, because it is ☺️☺️
One of my favorite things I've seen this year is a party decoration idea where instead of Happy Birthday!, they had balloons propped on the wall spelling "party ends at 9." It brings me back to all the times my family came to visit, and after a while the only thing I wanted to say was, "leave my house." I love you all but please leave my house.
This spoke to me deeply! Especially with how most black women are portrayed on social media, but we are all different. I don't necessarily identify as being "socially awkward" but I do self-identify as being an introvert because I really love and appreciate my "me" time. I love sitting alone, writing in my journal, praying, and meditating. This is how I recharge my batteries. Some people think I'm stuck up or standoff-ish. But I'm just recharging. Anyway, I LOVE YOUR PODCAST. Would love to do a collab with you if possible. Keep on pushing your mission beautiful❤
I can definitely relate to this. Im an introvert with social anxiety and It's so annoying that people have this expectation and stigma about black people having to always be social and loud all the time. i deal with this at work to the point that i dont even want to go to work because people feel uncomfortable around me when i dont give a reason to. I can't help that I'm quiet but im also friendly and still its not enough. I just feel alienated that I'm hated for my personality. I swear people are so weird and ignorant!
It great to comfortable in your own space,if you decide to be in your own sometimes it shouldnt be a problem. A lot of us are balanced individual, who can't stand too much drama, and very flexible if necessary, with not so much of the entitled manner that some extroverted individual demonstrate.
No matter what you do, what you say, what you wear, what language you speak, how you behave, how you carry yourself, if you are a black woman people will find reason to despise and disparage you simply for existing. You can't really win, so it's best to not play the game in the first place, at least not with other players.
Yes, my sister. I am a black man, and even though I am not a woman, I used to be introverted too. And I am glad that you are giving another perspective, and telling your truth.
Yes, I hated being so introverted as well. I truly admire people who are not like me. But I grew into loving and appreciating who I am. All I need is one or two good people and I’m good lol.
I'm black as well but honestly, I don't know that skin color has anything to do with it. I think people in general get judged for being too quiet and introverted.
I'm similar,because I love going out socializing and I respect other people and I like to have fun but there's another side of me, I don't react like any one else, I don't fall into others reactions, I'm peaceful, quiet, I'm myself and I don't expect anyone to understand it
After following you on IG and feeling like I've found my ppl....lol I've come here to subscribe! I need introverted friends! I believe I do. Always end up around extroverts cause you know we attract them. Nothing wrong with them. But it's something peaceful about being around other introverts.
Exactly!!! The vibe is always different with other introverts!!! 👏🏽🧡🧡 can truly be ourselves and not be overwhelmed. Some extroverts don’t understand that we have to “recharge” after awhile and they think acting funny. So it’s nice to have people that understand you perfectly
I can relate. For years people assumed that I was stuck up, mean, etc. I literally can’t take a of of stimulation and if I do, I need to sit out for a while to recover.
Yup! This is a video about me 👍🏾 I’m an intuitive empath and an introvert and people do misunderstand me, especially at work, it’s been this way all my life and I don’t explain myself I just stay to myself and mind my business ~ thank you for sharing this message ~ yes, we really do exist ~ Peace and Blessings ~ Love and Light 🦋🌻❤️🌻🦋
It's such a relief to learn that others aee experiencing this phenomenon. I have a BM neighbor who is tryib to bully me because I am quiet, single, and live alone and am new to rhe building. I'm legit respectful, quiet, clean and mind my business! This fool goes out of his way to interfere wit my peace. For ex: block my path on the staircase to get to my apartment, leaving smelly shoes inhhe hallway, clogging up the hallway etc.
I REALLY appreciate that I came across your channel and am here to stay you hear me!! Girl like 1:30 into the video you hit ALL of the points👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾! Like my goodness, the fact that I like to stay to myself and mind my own business but happen to be cool AF when I open up bothers the absolute fudge out of people😅 and really kinda makes me continue to enjoy my own space and value what I do with my downtime EVEN MORE!! Out here bothering people just by being myself! Super silly if you ask me.... everyone should like themselves and enjoy their own company but.....we ALL know that's a stretch for some😊
I’m sooooo glad that you love the video! Your comment is EVERYTHING! Like girl, I just really needed to just VENT out here because I knew that I wasn’t alone when it came to these problems!
Whewwww I need to make a CZcams video in this subject , I’ve never found a community where I could relate but you definitely inspired me to speak about it more ❤❤
I'm doing the same for *GROWN* BLAQ introverts (Ours has nothing to do with being 'shy' or socially awkward or admiring females like summerwalker, 😂) -- but whatEVER the motivation, I love that you TOOK ACTION and paved your own way with an open invite to build a *community* of likeminded girls who DON'T have an outlet.
I'm proud of you for diving into it and BUILDING the space that you needed to see!
This right here is exactly why I created the channel! I just knew that I couldn’t be alone when it came to the struggles that introverted black girls go through. To be a voice and to let other girls like us know that it’s ok to be who we are, to be confident in who we are 👏🏽🙌🏽🥹🥰
it has nothing to do with gender or race either
@@alanduff1054 Then it’s a good thing I didn’t leave MY sentiments to micromanage what YOU think about what this young lady (or I) meant.
😏😂 Nice try tho, karrin.😷👍🏽 I know you can’t help but to po’leece BLAQ women’s sentiments 🤭
@@alanduff1054 it does because black women specifically are expected to be loud and outgoing, and when we are quiet and stay to ourselves we are seen as stuck up . This is done to us by all races and is especially bad in the workplace or academic setting.
@@Quinn_M97 black men are too
It never stops I'm 70 yrs old and it has happened all my life.
It sure doesn't. I'm 40 now and now my co workers are like aren't you to old to be shy........ So misunderstood
Wow
@@kharab31Im 32 and I get that from ppl lol
@@kharab31 yep 😊
Loud people literally make me physically tired.
Soo true…I’ve noticed ppl take a disliking to me because I’m a black female introvert. But, if I were white or Asian I would be given the grace to be an introvert. It really is a tired racial stereotype
I know right!!! Society thinks that all black women act the same, like NO! We all have different personalities, including being an introvert, just like everyone else. Tired of people saying that I have an attitude just because I’m quiet 🤫 😪 it makes me sad 😔 sometimes
@@BlackGirlIntroverts keep up with your channel, ppl need to be educated!
@@iamthecrispconnoisseur will do 🥹🙌🏽🥰
Hell if we were Asian people would find it adorable. With us it's perceived as a threat😔
@@sissysovereign1294that just means they like Asians to not have a voice lol
I'm an introvert. And I feel like if more people minded their business there would be less crime. Introverts have no energy for drama. You don't know how many times I've walked away from ppl while they were still talking
😂😂😂
Very very true
THIS LOL!
😆
I'm very proud to be introverted. I could care less what others think or believe about me. It doesn't change the truth.
Exactly 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽😍
I’m a 40+ black woman who is still shy and over the years I have had the hardest time from childhood to adulthood from other black women.
Same here
Just turned 40. Same here Sis!
I’m 37 and I feel this
This!
Same here and the treatment from Black women in the workplace. A mess.
Being an introverted black woman with a lighter voice has been a terrible experience for me. Years of being bullied, even into adulthood. The amount of aggression I've been met with as soon as I speak is...beyond crazy. I've been yelled at by so many strangers in public and over the phone. I've been treated like I'm being sneaky or plotting at work. It honestly hasn't...been a happy life. I genuinely feel like I don't fit into my own life, like there is no place for me. When I meet other shy black girls, I think they're cute. I feel a need to protect them; I don't immediately think to tear them down.
Yes I agree that more introverted women have to stick together! It definitely gives a sense of relieve and gives us more confidence to be who we are when we have people who understand us
@@nashae-6575 I'm so sorry, because...it has been beyond hard.
I can relate, I became introverted in certain environments since losing my daughter. The almighty will bless you with something great I promise!
@@ailadacia9309 Thank you and I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I know that doesn't help much. I hope blessings fall your way as well.
I definitely relate so much. I'm often taken back and left feeling confused because my brain is not wired to where I think to purposely offend or be rude and disrespectful to anyone, especially unprovoked.
I even feel bad when I go off on people even when my actions are necessary. I just don't like hurting people even those who hurt me. That's why I don't understand how some people can literally not care how they treat people but yet I care so strongly. I get no joy out of hurting others, so I don't understand how some people find comfort in being assholes to others.
It intimidates people because they don’t know what you’re thinking. You’re a mystery and they don’t take the time to get to know you & they don’t trust it.
It's so weird! People put all kinds of negative narratives on us introverted black women. I deal with the same thing you discussed . People are big mad when you mind your own business. So many people at my job hate me it's crazy! I can barely get myself to go to work due to the toxicity I've experienced at my job. I'm burnt out! My battery needs to be recharged. Sadly, I experienced toxicity from black men, women, and all other races! Thank you for your video.
You’re welcome lovely! Yes I feel you on the co workers! The same thing happened to me and I would be frustrated because, the reason they don’t like me is because I’m quiet. Never made sense to me, it’s hurtful sometimes
I so understand you as an introverted black woman who unfortunately has a resting b..t..h face while I am lost in my own thoughts/head. I would recommended reading about the MBTI and enneagram system to better understand yourself and how you tick. The more you understand all aspects of yourself, the more compassion you will develop for yourself especially in light of the toxicity of others and that quiet self love will see you through and eventually attract people to your calming spirit.
Has NOTHING to do with GENDER trust me
Yes it’s all races
YES... Dealing with the bullying from BM who make it a special mission to try to interfere with my peace by making their presence known in the most obnoxious ways.
I thought this was just me, people are weird. I now look at it like this, the people who think quiet people are stuck up,are the ones with the problem. They will never know peace because they are very judgmental and not content with their own solitude.
Exactly! Once I realized that, I stopped letting people bother me so much.
What’s funny is that whenever we ARE loud and outspoken, we’re called “ghetto” or “agressive”. It’s like a double-edged sword
Right
You're not awkward, you're being yourself and you're beautiful.
Thank you so much ☺️ 🥹
Shout to all the introverts out there! We don't need to making up conversations just to be talking. 😂
I'm introverted. I'm get drained easily. I love my alone time, but I also love being social with people who I can be vulnerable with. I also have a short fuse, so being around a crowd is not always best for me....I love my quiet time. I love to pray, meditate, do yoga, listen to soulful music and love on those who truly hold space for me...Too often I am judged and mistreated because I don't fit the stereotype. I'm introverted with some extroverted tendencies, but 9 out of 10 times I'm quiet....I have to feel SAFE to let people in...I don't like surface bullshit...it's a waste of time to me.
I understand you 1000% 👏🏽 just want to be around people you can be vulnerable with and are GENUINE 🥰 it’s sometimes hard to find genuine people to have in your corner. That’s why I like to observe people before I try to get to know them.
All of this
I've been dealing with this for years and I'm an older black woman and it never changes... Black people are the most reactive to us introverts I've been harassed..Yes no one says anything about quiet white people but a quiet black woman "say what!!"
.
It really upsets people when you are quiet and black people REALLY get upset by it.. I've had black coworkers like come at me hard as if I'd done something to them all because I am quiet and a loner.. but as I get older I care less about what people think
I’m not trying to judge just trying to throw to you what I know. I noticed you said you love to pray and do yoga . I recently learned that yoga is demonic ( the poses and hand gestures) . I advise looking into it I learned I was doing an abomination to the MOST HIGH . All love sis 🩷
I'm a gay and black introvert and people can't take that I don't want to spill tea or kiki with them 😂 ESPECIALLY at work omg....I'm also perceived as standoffish and stuck up because I mind my business and don't share any of mine. People get pissed because they feel privileged to our energy before they even get to know us as a person and then they hit what I call the "wall".
People want us to be the entertainment or get tf out of their face. We can’t be quiet, shy, introverted, silly, scared, happy, or funny unless someone is profiting from it.
Well said 👏
Quiet, gentle, traditional, spiritual, me... Now let me go back to minding my own business. 😂
😂😂❤
I am a black woman who is 30 and introverted. People think just because I am quiet and always wanting to be alone that I am either mad, mean, or dislike them. None of this stuff is true. I have been this way since I was a child. I like minding my own business, not gossiping about others, and doing my own work and leaving with my check. I hate how people think just because your a black woman your going too; talk a lot, stand up for everyone, get loud, complain etc... I just don't care for all that. Black people even give me a hard time, black men ignore me and stare at me like it's weird that I am speechless. I can't get a date with a black man, they seem to like the stereotypical black woman named shaniqua.
Most people’s lives - especially extroverts’ and women’s - consist of other people’s business and being accepted by other people. This is why they can’t handle those of us who aren’t always talking, gossiping or trying to be accepted by them. I am older and I retired a year ago. Since then, I have really enjoyed not having to deal with all of the overly talkative and social co-workers who used to always try to get me to talk just for the sake of talking, just because they can’t handle silence.
Thank you for this platform! Yes as a black women who’s introverted we’re often misunderstood. I’m a friendly person but I don’t care to be everyone’s space all day. I’ve experienced a lot difficulties in the workplace because of my personality. I’ve been targeted and ostracized because being an introvert. I’m finally feeling comfortable in my skin. I am who I am. Thank you for being a voice!
Of course!!!! 😍😍😍😍 I will continue to be a voice for all us. People make it so hard for us introverted girlies to be ourselves. The negative stereotypes have to stop
Yes, I have also felt this sort of ostracization in certain spaces like the workplace huh... 🙄, oh well, I am who I am 🤷🏾♀️
Black introverts need more representation especially in media
Gosh I thought I was the only one, I’ve been accused of being proud, unsocial and unapproachable and I’m like why do you care? Black women need to start understanding and empathising with each other. It’s really sad. I’m an introvert and my friends always try to change me like there’s something wrong with me, I don’t gossip, I’m not rude, I’m friendly when I need to be, why do they think they have to change it?
Sounds like those aren't real friends tbh. If they really care for you, they wouldn't be so pressed to change who you are as a person. Why can't people just accept the fact that introverted black women exist too?
@@sissysovereign1294 , good point.
They cant figure us out...but they crave to label us so bad and when youre a bw introvert they cant fathom not being able to put you in a specific box or the one they think you should be in..Keep up the good work ladies
People be hating hard! 💯👏🏽😆 and thanks lovely ☺️
At this point in my life, I really don’t care what people feel about me being an introvert. If folks think I am stuck up, it’s oh well.
I’ve come to that exact point in my life as well 💪🏽 love it being who I am 💕👏🏽
Good for you. Now you can enjoy life on your own terms. I wasted so much time trying to mold myself into what I never will be. The sooner one learns it’s perfectly fine to be who you are, the better.
I thought it was only me. My ex-husband’s family used to make comments like “I thought I was too good, or stuck up” just because I’m introverted. It used to hurt me that they couldn’t see or respect that I’m just quiet.
I love being introverted it brings me a level of peace I wouldn't trade for the world ❤
Yes 🙌🏽 solitude is everything for us introverts 🥰
Introverted black men feel the same.
50yo introvert who only learned of such a thing a few years ago. I'm so glad to finally put a title to it because I can totally stop beating myself up for being who I am and stop forcing myself to be something that I am not.
I just found this CZcams video and already can relate. I was ostracized my whole existence. I just got real tired.
❤❤❤
I always get the resting B face comment but it’s because I’m usually deep in thought about a million things 😂. Say one word to me and I’m smiling and talking and engaged, lol and the “omg you’re so sweet!!” Follows all the time
Like yeah, I’m just chill. Lol. I don’t like loud places for hours (clubs), I prefer meaningful convo over forced, etc etc.
The pandemic really showed me how miserable people are because they can’t sit alone with themselves for long periods of time without getting depressed 😵💫😵💫😵💫. I couldn’t imagine 😂
Great video! Happy to have come across this video 🎉
I'm a black man who was just strolling through and seen this. I'm about 3 minutes into your conversation and already I can tell I like where you going with this. The way you describe yourself and to all the women out there like you, y'all are a breath of fresh air. A dream come true, no cap! God knows I wish I could have the pleasure of meeting someone like you. I also tend to roll solo. I just focus on my relationship with God, weight training, my income and staying away from chaos and renewing my mind to be the best man I can be for me and whoever the woman maybe that will enter my life. I support you sister ✊💯
Awe ☺️☺️☺️☺️ thank you so much my brother ✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽🥰
We’re out here, we’re just at home 😭
You need a quiet girl like me!
@@mistol2130 I definitely do. Wish I knew. Stay sweet 😘
@@mistol2130 if you ever feel like you want to connect let me know and I'll reach out to you.
You know what is crazy? Ppl just expect black women to be extroverted. When we quiet, its "you got an attitude, whats wrong, and all this" but let is be asian, then its "awww, she shy, she cute" idc anymore about seeming antisocial, i ain't gonna burn my fuse for everyone. Extroverts need to learn to make space for us.
Period ‼️‼️‼️‼️
Hello fellow Black introverts, I've read thru most of the comments and listened to the video. WE R ALL EXPERIENCING THE SAME EXACT THINGS!! 😮😮
Does anyone have any tips for finding work from home jobs or 'out in the field' type jobs?? BCUZ I'M SICK OF NASTY OFFICE GOSSIPY, TWO FACED, BULLY CULTURE!
I wish I had the skills to be a digital nomad. Maybe that's something I will have to work towards; a goal. Bcuz life is too short for this office drama sh#t!
Sometimes I just don’t want to talk and I’m in my thoughts and I like to observe things and people. When you observe you see everything clearly. And I just love being alone in my own company, it’s refreshing. I get drained easily when I’m around other people I don’t feel comfortable or safe with.
I feel you on the pressure it felt to be really social in high school. I feel like I’m a black girl ambivert. I have moments where I love to be a social butterfly and thrive off of being surrounded by others. Then I also have my moments where I love to disappear off of social media, group chats, and other distractions to have complete isolation and recharge. It confuses people that are trying to get to know me when they see me being social and at every function then see me shutting down for a couple of weeks. They always think something bad happened to when really this is just normal for me.
Or they take it personally like you got a problem with them. Like ma'am/sir it's not about you. 🤷🏽♀️
People are so use to picking at the person they truly wish they could become and find it easier to misdirect/project their insecurities onto others than deal with the battle within or try to be nice 😒
However it is brave to show up authentically as self! Black Girls: you are loved Black Women: you are cherished! I thank you for being you 🤍
Exactly! Most people can’t even fathom to be in their own solitude. So when they see others like us do it, it confuses them 😂
@@BlackGirlIntroverts absolute facts!!
This has been me my entire life. Ostracized and bullied by other races, including our own because I'm quiet, lack a blaccent, and don't act like the ghetto stereotype everyone likes to be comfortable with and laugh at. It's crazy because when we act like our authentic introverted selves it makes people angry and uncomfortable. If we are the stereotype it makes people angry and uncomfortable. It's sad that how no matter what we do, what we say, or how we act, we lose..😔
I am an introverted black girl too - and I find that it can be hard to get along with even other black people (since everyone talks a lot). Anyway, I find a lot of peace in being myself, and I think this video from you is much needed.
Thank you so much ☺️
I hate when people say “you’re too good.” Not everyone has to hang around them. More importantly, the introvert has to think they’re better than everyone.
I’m highly sensitive, introverted black woman who is an INFP and I love this whole video. I used to think that something was wrong with me until I discovered all these things about me and met others who share similar experiences. I used to get bullied a lot for being shy and quiet (also for being neurodivergent), and I thought there was something wrong with me because of it. I spent more of my time drawing, writing, and in my thoughts than I did socializing or making friends. I would also get jealous of my sisters and my cousin for being more sociable and having more friends than I did, but I later learned to accept who I am. Glad you made this video, you’re voice is pretty, and hope this gets more attention ❤
Your comment literally described me all the way down to being bullied and being jealous of my friends because they were more extroverted than I was! But I’m so happy to know that you accepted yourself for who you are on the inside and out because that’s all that matters 👏🏽 I think that it’s so cool that you know how to draw ✍🏽 (wish I had that talent lol)
We don’t even do nothing to nobody so it’s crazy how we can be disliked 😭
6:54 My exact same sentiment. Every time I tried to “fit in” and be more outgoing just to please others and feel more accepted it always backfires. So I have now come to a place where I have accepted who I am as an Introvert and I will live my life in a way that suits me and not care how others may perceive me. Those who are meant to be in my life will naturally gravitate toward me and vice versa.
Exactly where I am too 🙌🏽 been peaceful ever since ❤
Excellent video. I resonated with everything you mentioned Sis! Thank you for being an advocate for us introverted sisters 🙌🏽👏🏽
I’m so sorry I’m now seeing your comment, I took a break from CZcams for a minute.
But of course I’ll always be an advocate. Always and forever 🙌🏽😍
I dont know who originally said it, but this quote puts a lot into perspective for me: people who want to be left alone will always be overtaken by the people who want power.
So if you're someone who generally desires to be left alone to do your thing (introvert, libertarian, free-spirit, etc), it's important to cultivate your power to keep the narcs and vampires away, and vet each and every person who gets to have access to you.
Thank you so much for creating a safe space for introverted black girls/women. I’ve always felt I was alone thank you ❤️
You’re welcome sis 🥰🥰🥰🥹🥹
Quiet and mostly to myself is a no no at the workplace. You'll be seen as suspicious, untrustworthy, and full of yourself. There's a psychology behind people being uncomfortable around the quiet. People need to understand this and learn how to play the game to make your life easier. Don't play the game the consequences are bountiful and predictable.
Ever heard the saying the emptiest vessels make the most noise? It can be used to explain how loudmouths aren't saying anything. Yet most trust the loudmouths. We know what they are thinking because they are always talking $h!t and that makes us feel comfortable.
So, what do you do in a work situation for example? If you choose to stay quiet the consequences will come and can lead to being fired in some instances. To play the game just requires you to stop not talking to people. Stop buy say a few words and keep it pushing. You don't have to gossip just don't sit off in corners isolating yourself. Go to work play the game go home and decompress. This is for your paycheck. As for other situations if you want to go off into a corner and the only consequences are social then fine. But for the paycheck....play that game until you've started your own company and can do what you want.
Again, obviously how people are reacting to quiet people is the issue and not the quiet person. But if you understand and can predict human behaviour you need to make it work for you by acting accordingly to get the desired results.
Awesome points👌
An introverted black woman.is a celebrity..for real!!
I love being an introvert …,
Eff everybody n their feelings !!!!
- the observer
I can definitely relate to this. Everyone thinks I’m mean or stuck up. Im learning to love me. I’m just quite. I hate having to explain I’m not weird I just speak when I have something to say. It’s exhausting. Nice to know I’m not alone
The worst part for me is the workplace. I hate work meetings and now I have a new job that requires that I give weekly presentations. I really want to change careers and work with computers but I just got this new promotion at the office job. Not to mention my boss is an outspoken black woman and often looks at me like I'm an alien. She even said I was acting a little standoffish and timid when working with a client. This job is very hard for me because of my introversion but I can't leave right now 🙄
Hey I’m so sorry about that, I know it’s gotta be tough 😢 having to do weekly presentations sounds like a lot and scary! But just know that you got this! You deserve that promotion and you’re gonna kill those presentations 👏🏽
In the meantime, you WILL find a career that best suits you 🧡 it will all be worth it
I love this discussion because I definitely feel a shift change when people realize that I am introverted and or reserved and I’m pretty non judge mental so it’s definitely eye-opening to see how other people show up and it just let me know I would rather not be around that type of energy❤
❤❤❤
People are entertained and comfort by stereotypical black women.
When people can across an introvert black woman, they feel cheated out of that entertainment and comfort.
I think the attitude and resent you are getting is because introverts usually have alot to to give and other people want some of it. Also, people who are not content within themselves are angry that you CAN be so comfortable within yourself. It's all stemming from self-serving and jealousy
That’s what I am slowly learning to understand at this point! A lot of people can’t stand to be alone and feel that they are unworthy. You’re right, the envy people have towards us is ridiculous 😒
Being able to be by ourselves and not care what people think is such a power move 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I got labeled RETARD just cause I quiet. My own relatives done made me feel bad bout myself cause im by myself
so sorry dont listen to them
People can misunderstand me all they want but I wish they'd just be respectful and leave me alone.
Yes I mind my own Business But I know Everything.
They hate it. It’s been a problem every job I’ve hard. I don’t know what to do career wise
I feel so seen! Society thrives off of insecurities and people are wayyy too consumed with the surface level foolishness, Im falling in love with this aspect of me because not everyone who approaches is genuine sending love to all Intros bc we are more important than we’re treated ❤
The thing is you have to bring the pain to people who try to take your peace from you. I have three modes, Indifferent, loving and to hell I will send thee. Once they know you will take it there, they scatter like the bugs they are.
So relatable. I feel the same when at work. I find it real difficult to “make friends” because I have a hard time just being outgoing or making small talk. I’ve never been that type to strike up a conversation out of no where.. it just doesn’t come naturally to me. But I will say hello or give a true compliment. I think introverts are feelers and we navigate the world on a deeper level and are careful with our energy. Extroverts just dont get it and think we are weird and antisocial. Ugh… its just who we are.
As an introverted black man I get the type of energy. Love seeing you owning who you are. Keep being you.
Thank you so much ☺️
The stories people make up around you so that they could feel better in where to place you in their head is outstanding. At my old (and first) job I had a manger tell me that people don’t pick on me because they think I’d kill somebody which was funny at first bc it sounded foolish and so far left but then I started to feel some type of way about it bc I literally don’t do anything to anyone to warrant something dumb asf like that. I’ve really grown to love this aspect of myself though, I find so much power in not letting people know my every thought 😂
Anyways I’m thankful for this trait bc it really weeds out the people who don’t need access to you and helped me even form really good bonds with people I actually want around.
I understand exactly how you feel! I’ve had someone at work say that that I look like I would kill someone too 😂 but in reality I’m just chillin 😎 I’m trying every day not to take things so personal. So far so good! I love that you find power in it, because it is ☺️☺️
One of my favorite things I've seen this year is a party decoration idea where instead of Happy Birthday!, they had balloons propped on the wall spelling "party ends at 9." It brings me back to all the times my family came to visit, and after a while the only thing I wanted to say was, "leave my house."
I love you all but please leave my house.
I'm glad Black women are becoming introverts. Your deliverance is within in you and no where else.
Not becoming introverts, they’ve always been that way. Different people have different personalities
I love being introverted
Me too sis ❤❤❤ never will change
Minding Your Own Business Is A Literal Life Skill That Most Do Not Have.
I could cry. There were no people like you when i was coming up
🥹☺️😍
CZcams Algorithm is amazing. I found the right community 😊
😍😍☺️
This spoke to me deeply! Especially with how most black women are portrayed on social media, but we are all different. I don't necessarily identify as being "socially awkward" but I do self-identify as being an introvert because I really love and appreciate my "me" time. I love sitting alone, writing in my journal, praying, and meditating. This is how I recharge my batteries. Some people think I'm stuck up or standoff-ish. But I'm just recharging. Anyway, I LOVE YOUR PODCAST. Would love to do a collab with you if possible. Keep on pushing your mission beautiful❤
Omg thanks so much! 🥹🥹🥹 just like how I’m writing this comment, I’m in my car eating lunch at the moment 😂 loveeeee my alone time too 😂
I can relate to everything! I love being an introvert. People misjudge us all the time!
I can definitely relate to this. Im an introvert with social anxiety and It's so annoying that people have this expectation and stigma about black people having to always be social and loud all the time. i deal with this at work to the point that i dont even want to go to work because people feel uncomfortable around me when i dont give a reason to. I can't help that I'm quiet but im also friendly and still its not enough. I just feel alienated that I'm hated for my personality. I swear people are so weird and ignorant!
It great to comfortable in your own space,if you decide to be in your own sometimes it shouldnt be a problem. A lot of us are balanced individual, who can't stand too much drama, and very flexible if necessary, with not so much of the entitled manner that some extroverted individual demonstrate.
No matter what you do, what you say, what you wear, what language you speak, how you behave, how you carry yourself, if you are a black woman people will find reason to despise and disparage you simply for existing. You can't really win, so it's best to not play the game in the first place, at least not with other players.
Yes, my sister. I am a black man, and even though I am not a woman, I used to be introverted too. And I am glad that you are giving another perspective, and telling your truth.
Thank you 🥹☺️👏🏽
Yes, I hated being so introverted as well. I truly admire people who are not like me. But I grew into loving and appreciating who I am. All I need is one or two good people and I’m good lol.
I'm black as well but honestly, I don't know that skin color has anything to do with it. I think people in general get judged for being too quiet and introverted.
I'm similar,because I love going out socializing and I respect other people and I like to have fun but there's another side of me, I don't react like any one else, I don't fall into others reactions, I'm peaceful, quiet, I'm myself and I don't expect anyone to understand it
After following you on IG and feeling like I've found my ppl....lol I've come here to subscribe! I need introverted friends! I believe I do. Always end up around extroverts cause you know we attract them. Nothing wrong with them. But it's something peaceful about being around other introverts.
Exactly!!! The vibe is always different with other introverts!!! 👏🏽🧡🧡 can truly be ourselves and not be overwhelmed. Some extroverts don’t understand that we have to “recharge” after awhile and they think acting funny. So it’s nice to have people that understand you perfectly
I can relate. For years people assumed that I was stuck up, mean, etc. I literally can’t take a of of stimulation and if I do, I need to sit out for a while to recover.
First 80 seconds of the video & you've already described me 🥲
Yup! This is a video about me 👍🏾 I’m an intuitive empath and an introvert and people do misunderstand me, especially at work, it’s been this way all my life and I don’t explain myself I just stay to myself and mind my business ~ thank you for sharing this message ~ yes, we really do exist ~ Peace and Blessings ~ Love and Light 🦋🌻❤️🌻🦋
😊😊🥰🥹
Just me self I and I'm ok with that.
It's such a relief to learn that others aee experiencing this phenomenon. I have a BM neighbor who is tryib to bully me because I am quiet, single, and live alone and am new to rhe building. I'm legit respectful, quiet, clean and mind my business! This fool goes out of his way to interfere wit my peace. For ex: block my path on the staircase to get to my apartment, leaving smelly shoes inhhe hallway, clogging up the hallway etc.
More content please. Stream of consciousness stuff im happy with
I found my tribe
I REALLY appreciate that I came across your channel and am here to stay you hear me!! Girl like 1:30 into the video you hit ALL of the points👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾! Like my goodness, the fact that I like to stay to myself and mind my own business but happen to be cool AF when I open up bothers the absolute fudge out of people😅 and really kinda makes me continue to enjoy my own space and value what I do with my downtime EVEN MORE!! Out here bothering people just by being myself! Super silly if you ask me.... everyone should like themselves and enjoy their own company but.....we ALL know that's a stretch for some😊
I’m sooooo glad that you love the video! Your comment is EVERYTHING! Like girl, I just really needed to just VENT out here because I knew that I wasn’t alone when it came to these problems!
Thank you for this
Hear hear!
I relate so much to this video
Not sure if you’ll see this but you should a some story times or discuss in depth about introverted friendship dynamics
Yes definitely will 💯 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Sograteful for our content feels great to have such a space
❤ I appreciate you creating this space for us.
❤❤❤
are there irl networking groups for black girl introverts? specifically in nyc or dc area?
Good to see you tell your story.
Thank you so much 😊
Thank you for this! Resonated with me
🥹😍😍
I love this video! Keep going!❤
🥹🥰🥰
Listening now and I feel like you are telling my life story, it’s definitely has been a journey to find my voice. Looking forward to this channel.
Thank you. This is so needed. Peace and blessings to you!❤
Thanks so much 😍🥹🥹🥹
So glad I found this!!!!! I can relate so hard to all of this!!!!! Been feeling like an outcast all my life. 🎉
Whewwww I need to make a CZcams video in this subject , I’ve never found a community where I could relate but you definitely inspired me to speak about it more ❤❤
Yasss 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽 that’s what it’s all about 🥰 can’t wait to watch your video