When Everything is Off Brand

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  • čas přidán 17. 12. 2021
  • Holiday Season deal! Go to nordvpn.com/stevenhe to get a 2-year plan plus 1 additional month with a huge discount.
    Discount: 73%, monthly price: $2,16/month.
    FAILURE MANAGEMENT SWEATERS
    stevenheshop.com/
    #Skit #comedy #Shopping
    When I was 13 I went into a shop that had everything off brand, look around and finally found a legit bottle of coke. Bought it, Drank it, had the worst stomach ache of my life. The coke was Legit but 5 years out of date. That's why I made this video.
    Patreon:
    / stevenhe
    Instagram:
    / thestevenhe
    reddit:
    / stevenhe
  • Komedie

Komentáře • 10K

  • @StevenHe
    @StevenHe  Před 2 lety +3792

    Holiday Season deal! Go to nordvpn.com/stevenhe
    to get a 2-year plan plus 1 additional month with a huge discount.

    • @evilcat212
      @evilcat212 Před 2 lety +7

      Oot

    • @kingpanda904
      @kingpanda904 Před 2 lety +7

      First to like this comment rest of you are failures

    • @DefinitelyNotJethro
      @DefinitelyNotJethro Před 2 lety +6

      We haven't got "Nord VPN"... We got "South VPN"! ("Nord" means "North" in German... Yeah it's a bad joke lol)

    • @W.HDcFanFanArt
      @W.HDcFanFanArt Před 2 lety +12

      Oh no what's happened to your eye whatever ever it is I hope that it heals and the bejjing embassy doesn't hear from this message

    • @justright2357
      @justright2357 Před 2 lety +3

      Amazing

  • @ThatGothScarlly
    @ThatGothScarlly Před 2 lety +13681

    "You got Hersheys"
    "We got he/hims"
    Literally the best line

    • @Everie
      @Everie Před 2 lety +545

      👞 I will send you to Jesus

    • @owoe_flower
      @owoe_flower Před 2 lety +206

      LMAO i missed it bc the video was going a little too fast and now im laughing my ass off at this comment.

    • @blnkxn0c0mp81
      @blnkxn0c0mp81 Před 2 lety +56

      I get it now 😂😂

    • @Muninnfeathers
      @Muninnfeathers Před 2 lety +47

      Deceased. 💀

    • @ThatGothScarlly
      @ThatGothScarlly Před 2 lety +28

      My first ever comment to reach 1k likes...... Wow
      Why this tho

  • @GamePandaXXL
    @GamePandaXXL Před 2 lety +5210

    "we have 5-day-depression"
    "thats called WEEK DAYS"
    god why is that so true

  • @LucidVitro
    @LucidVitro Před rokem +177

    "You got Call of Duty"
    "We got Text of Job"
    THIS LINE KILLED ME

  • @YourName-qg2of
    @YourName-qg2of Před rokem +54

    "Oh no that's not Microsoft, that's * laughter * big hard."
    "BEEEEEG HAAAAAAAAAAARD?"

  • @reiteration6273
    @reiteration6273 Před 2 lety +23706

    When he said "Tournament of Failures", I knew Steven's Dad would buy that in a heartbeat. 🤣

    • @kekso2205
      @kekso2205 Před 2 lety +637

      League of Legends is Turnament of Failures the should rename the game after that.

    • @birdurai6688
      @birdurai6688 Před 2 lety +77

      @@user-nd4ij3zf3x I'm more confused of the #'s...

    • @stare4539
      @stare4539 Před 2 lety +13

      咯哦哦了

    • @KeloNem
      @KeloNem Před 2 lety +185

      why did I think the dad was gonna say “THATS JUST MY SON PLAYING GAMES”

    • @skunk2x19
      @skunk2x19 Před 2 lety +36

      i knew he would buy five

  • @figloalds
    @figloalds Před 2 lety +7451

    "We got 5-day depression"
    "What the hell, they're called week days!"
    That one was good af

    • @ibrahimahm3d
      @ibrahimahm3d Před 2 lety +25

      🔥🔥🔥🔥

    • @gmoney6935
      @gmoney6935 Před 2 lety +64

      I didn't even process that one!

    • @ibrahimahm3d
      @ibrahimahm3d Před 2 lety +42

      @@gmoney6935 same until I saw this comment… it’s definitely the best joke in the video I love his off brand videos

    • @sanchitamandal7485
      @sanchitamandal7485 Před 2 lety +10

      I almost died lmao

    • @tanthovo5894
      @tanthovo5894 Před 2 lety +9

      You mean school

  • @GlitchyBoy823
    @GlitchyBoy823 Před 5 měsíci +153

    “You got Quakers Oats “
    “We got Jacob’s Nuts”

    • @savitaruhella9573
      @savitaruhella9573 Před 4 měsíci +13

      I made one also
      "You got clash of clans"
      "We got peace of kingdoms"

    • @FuriousGuy1234
      @FuriousGuy1234 Před 3 měsíci

      @@savitaruhella9573dude that’s actually good

    • @Darkgubz
      @Darkgubz Před 3 měsíci

      ​@@savitaruhella9573you got Subway surfer?
      Nah,we got planes fly

    • @PurpleGuy661
      @PurpleGuy661 Před 2 měsíci +5

      Person 1: what are you eating?
      Person 2: Jacob’s Nuts
      ☠️

    • @shadoww-snoww
      @shadoww-snoww Před 2 měsíci +1

      @@PurpleGuy661 "I love Jacob's nuts! They taste so good!"

  • @queervods
    @queervods Před rokem +254

    “you got five hour energy?”
    “we got 5 day depression”
    that got me 😂

    • @thestrangeone12209
      @thestrangeone12209 Před 7 měsíci +1

      5 day depression somehow just synthesizes in my stomach every time right before it wears off. i’m depressed

    • @OeaoTaruaYT
      @OeaoTaruaYT Před 6 měsíci +5

      "Thats called weekdays!"

    • @IDKTECHSPERTS
      @IDKTECHSPERTS Před 5 měsíci

      Me too

    • @MrBowen-rx5st
      @MrBowen-rx5st Před 4 měsíci

      Next episode should add 5 weeks depression haha

    • @MrBowen-rx5st
      @MrBowen-rx5st Před 4 měsíci

      Next episode should add 5 weeks depression haha

  • @sans9232
    @sans9232 Před 2 lety +6323

    "You got 5 hours energy?"
    "We got 5 days depression"
    That's the line that made me wheeze until I almost passed out

    • @G4L4XYISIDK
      @G4L4XYISIDK Před 2 lety +63

      That's...
      big.. hard....
      KOALA THEATER
      Fifth Day
      Tournamental Failure

    • @zdcrypt5687
      @zdcrypt5687 Před 2 lety +25

      @@G4L4XYISIDK the hail you mean koala theater it’s koala detour😂 and tournamental failure? It’s tournament of failures.

    • @joshuaarsis7753
      @joshuaarsis7753 Před 2 lety +4

      @@G4L4XYISIDK 😂

    • @beidmoint1370
      @beidmoint1370 Před 2 lety +68

      IT'S CALLED WEEKDAYS HAHAHAHA

    • @muhammadirfanseptiannugrah5341
      @muhammadirfanseptiannugrah5341 Před 2 lety +3

      @@beidmoint1370 what the heck

  • @meghanmedendorp3257
    @meghanmedendorp3257 Před 2 lety +7289

    I love how he couldn’t even hold his laughter when he said “oh that’s not Microsoft, that’s big hard”

    • @wolfpriest6954
      @wolfpriest6954 Před 2 lety +123

      Big hard what?

    • @meghanmedendorp3257
      @meghanmedendorp3257 Před 2 lety +331

      @@wolfpriest6954 it’s the opposite of Microsoft. Micro= small, so big. Soft is hard. So big hard.

    • @minijp1300
      @minijp1300 Před 2 lety +198

      Its a ‘thats what she said joke’ if u dont get it u dont get it

    • @meghanmedendorp3257
      @meghanmedendorp3257 Před 2 lety +21

      @@minijp1300 we’re you replying to ME or the other person??

    • @eisenklad
      @eisenklad Před 2 lety +72

      @@meghanmedendorp3257 you could also say macrohard

  • @SpaceVacuum-xb2ki
    @SpaceVacuum-xb2ki Před rokem +5

    The way the guy SCREAMED "BIG-HARD" with a straight face is magnificent

  • @AnimCosplays3
    @AnimCosplays3 Před rokem +69

    Famous quotes, “KOALA DETOUR” and “BIG HARD” said by Steven he, the guy who makes us laugh every day.

  • @DragonBorne1991
    @DragonBorne1991 Před 2 lety +4463

    "Is that Matt Damon?"
    "No, that's his cousin Carpet Damon."
    "I will send you to Jesus."
    Best. Line. Ever.

  • @Bogdanol1
    @Bogdanol1 Před 2 lety +3841

    "We've got tournament of failures."
    "I'll take 5."
    Legendary tier joke

  • @sabbath.death_punk666
    @sabbath.death_punk666 Před rokem +38

    it was too funny even Steven couldn't help but start chuckling 1:09 best part of the video

  • @zairerolle757
    @zairerolle757 Před 6 měsíci +5

    "You got ice cream?"
    "We have fire milk."
    "FIIRRE MILLLKK?!"
    "Only from the angriest cows."

  • @throne8593
    @throne8593 Před 2 lety +2965

    “That’s big hard”
    “BIG HARD”
    I love this line, it really is great because he holds back his laughter

  • @radlinraf9236
    @radlinraf9236 Před 2 lety +3773

    “Thats not Microsoft, Thats big hard ”
    "BIG HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!"
    That's the line that made me wheeze until I almost passed out!! Literally the best line!! 🤣🤣🤣

  • @JustYourAverageYouTubeViewer

    "Surely you have Hershey's"
    "We have Hehims" 😭

  • @MewsHeart151
    @MewsHeart151 Před rokem +4

    1:47 I was waiting for him to say,"Steven would love that"lol

  • @arandomweeb1890
    @arandomweeb1890 Před 2 lety +1765

    "Oh no thats not Microsoft, thats Big Hard"
    I love how he doesn't cut the part where he laughs at this, it makes it even more hilarious

  • @Moshuun
    @Moshuun Před 2 lety +1033

    Idky but “crocodile help” put me on the floor.

    • @StevenHe
      @StevenHe  Před 2 lety +93

      😂😂😂

    • @kziila0244
      @kziila0244 Před 2 lety +24

      @@StevenHe
      Just saying, but Kitkat should’ve been Pupdog since baby cats are called kit/kitten and baby dogs are called pup/puppy.

    • @kziila0244
      @kziila0244 Před 2 lety +11

      @@amoeba_with_rizz
      How is that an r/whoosh? He was obviously playing on the word ‘kat’ being ‘cat’ and making an opposite version. Kitcat. Pupdog. That would’ve enhanced the joke. What are you on?

    • @laserblast1832
      @laserblast1832 Před 2 lety +4

      @@kziila0244 just ignore him, just another braindead commenter looking for attention

    • @riduanaqil1452
      @riduanaqil1452 Před 2 lety +3

      @@kziila0244 I was thinking of adult dog

  • @Borsh9028
    @Borsh9028 Před 4 měsíci +4

    "You got 7 days to die?"
    "We got 1 week to live"

  • @lewilayrencemoe9474
    @lewilayrencemoe9474 Před rokem +2

    "That's not MICROSOFT, that's BIG HARD"

  • @master_mega
    @master_mega Před 2 lety +2831

    As an Australian I can confirm that “crocodile-help” is our favourite drink

    • @master_mega
      @master_mega Před 2 lety +97

      But I cannot vouch for “koala-detour” as that’s just made by a company in another country that sells Australian food

    • @yn-kun6538
      @yn-kun6538 Před 2 lety +57

      Americans just don’t understand the beauty of crocodile-help 😔🤚🏼

    • @yellowwasp6949
      @yellowwasp6949 Před 2 lety +8

      @@yn-kun6538 I know right

    • @master_mega
      @master_mega Před 2 lety +2

      @@Tech-Ultimate it’s a joke yeash

    • @kapythebara5089
      @kapythebara5089 Před 2 lety +2

      @@yn-kun6538 same

  • @luwi5972
    @luwi5972 Před 2 lety +830

    "You got 5 hour energy?"
    "We got 5 day depression"
    "What the he- it's called weekdays"
    Yeah hes not wrong

  • @carlabroderick5508
    @carlabroderick5508 Před rokem +6

    As creative as you are, your Dad is right, one succeeds with more education. True even for comedians.

  • @oozychubs5-3
    @oozychubs5-3 Před rokem +15

    This man deserves an Oscar 😂😂

  • @The_GreenHub
    @The_GreenHub Před 2 lety +4025

    Steven trying to control his laughter at the "big hard" bit was so funny

    • @felixlee9645
      @felixlee9645 Před 2 lety +38

      Explain the pepsi thing

    • @samhamplayz3251
      @samhamplayz3251 Před 2 lety +12

      lol

    • @MrPP.
      @MrPP. Před 2 lety +152

      @@felixlee9645 cause it's pronounced as pep-see, so they sell the off brand version which is Pep-Hear

    • @rosanafalcao4038
      @rosanafalcao4038 Před 2 lety +60

      @@MrPP. I think it should've been Pepno since si in Spanish is yes

    • @PatoChu
      @PatoChu Před 2 lety +21

      @@rosanafalcao4038 yes I was waiting for someopne to say that

  • @DC-tm7hs
    @DC-tm7hs Před 2 lety +1844

    When the dad yelled “BIG HAAAARD?!?!” I nearly died laughing and crying!🤣🤣🤣

  • @NanobanaKinako
    @NanobanaKinako Před 7 měsíci +7

    You got CZcams?
    No, we got MePipe

  • @EshwarYEAH
    @EshwarYEAH Před 3 měsíci +2

    O I have some ideas if that’s ok
    Stevan : do you have ketchup?
    Worker : no sorry we have slowdown
    Stevan : ok do you have mustard?
    Worker : sorry we have musentfrog

  • @ZigZagPower
    @ZigZagPower Před 2 lety +1796

    Yooo, another banger from Steven!

    • @user-nd4ij3zf3x
      @user-nd4ij3zf3x Před 2 lety

      --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Party Special for you
      💋 NUDE.SNAPGIRLS.TODAY/SIESTA?Party 💋.
      Gaze: "Amazed"
      Lips: "Sensual"
      Smile: "Sweeter"
      Body: "Colder"
      Жизнь, как красивая мелодия, только песни перепутались.
      #однако #я #люблю #таких #рыбаков #垃圾--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Party Special for you
      💋 NUDE.SNAPGIRLS.TODAY/SIESTA?Party 💋.
      Gaze: "Amazed"
      Lips: "Sensual"
      Smile: "Sweeter"
      Body: "Colder"
      Жизнь, как красивая мелодия, только песни перепутались.
      #однако #я #люблю #таких #рыбаков #垃圾

    • @justright2357
      @justright2357 Před 2 lety +4

      OH NEVER KNEW ZIG WAS HERE lol

    • @dremsten8988
      @dremsten8988 Před 2 lety +2

      just like he banged his head

    • @divbs1605
      @divbs1605 Před 2 lety

      Hi ZigZag

    • @divbs1605
      @divbs1605 Před 2 lety

      @@slimetree like last week or the week before

  • @jiungieluvs
    @jiungieluvs Před 2 lety +1393

    "I will send you to Jesus."
    LITERALLY MAKES ME LAUGH EVERY TIME.
    edit: mom i’m famous

    • @pkphantom
      @pkphantom Před 2 lety +16

      I don't know why that keeps catching me off guard but I'm glad it does

    • @wdolgae
      @wdolgae Před 2 lety +2

      I was expecting a response to that!

    • @jiungieluvs
      @jiungieluvs Před 2 lety +1

      @@pkphantom SAME ☠️

    • @jiungieluvs
      @jiungieluvs Před 2 lety

      @@wdolgae hello :3

    • @flare0114
      @flare0114 Před 2 lety

      @@wdolgae "You can deliver me to Buddha"

  • @RobloxKid123
    @RobloxKid123 Před rokem +3

    "Do you have jolly ranchers"
    "We have depressed ranchers"
    "DEPRESSED RANCHERS???? How do those taste like?"
    "They taste like your life"

  • @waltofalltrades6817
    @waltofalltrades6817 Před 2 lety +838

    "You got ice cream?"
    "We got fire milk."
    That one just about killed me. XD

  • @gavalant366
    @gavalant366 Před 2 lety +688

    "you got Quaker's oats?"
    "Nope we got Jacob's Nuts."
    *I'm ded*

  • @angryboi595
    @angryboi595 Před rokem +1

    I like how you can visibly see him try his best to hold in his laugh

  • @avocado8520
    @avocado8520 Před rokem

    The "ĶØÃŁÃ ĐĒŤØØØÜŘ‽!" bloopers are in my head rent free now

  • @kamiladrewaossowska1847
    @kamiladrewaossowska1847 Před 2 lety +3542

    I love how he couldn't even say "big hard" without laughing lol

    • @StevenHe
      @StevenHe  Před 2 lety +1087

      probably best joke I've ever written

    • @Celestial_Iris
      @Celestial_Iris Před 2 lety +84

      @@user-nd4ij3zf3x dude wtf

    • @redstonulo
      @redstonulo Před 2 lety +59

      @@Celestial_Iris i knew this was gonna be there (its probably a bot)

    • @og_ocassions
      @og_ocassions Před 2 lety +21

      I thought the same thing!! LMAOOO! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @og_ocassions
      @og_ocassions Před 2 lety +16

      @@redstonulo yea it is, unless they comment on this comment.

  • @lostsilver94
    @lostsilver94 Před 2 lety +1762

    "You got Quakers Oats?"
    "We got Jacobs Nuts!"
    Second best line ever

  • @skyline3230
    @skyline3230 Před rokem +3

    3:00 is it just me or is his laugh very contagious. I love it

  • @YaksuNeku
    @YaksuNeku Před rokem

    "We have 'Tournament of Failures'". LOL, I lost it.

  • @leo-hao
    @leo-hao Před 2 lety +686

    Cashier: "Tournament of failures"
    Steven's dad: "Hey my son is in that"

    • @falkov1441
      @falkov1441 Před 2 lety +34

      "tournament of failures"
      Stevens dad: TAKE MY MONEY

    • @StevenHe
      @StevenHe  Před 2 lety +100

      HAHAHA it's only steven

    • @tejascheema9712
      @tejascheema9712 Před 2 lety +9

      @@StevenHe this is like sprint video, but faster

    • @Mortisem
      @Mortisem Před 2 lety +4

      Yeah, copyright money

    • @Mainter23
      @Mainter23 Před 2 lety +3

      @@StevenHe and he still cannot win

  • @sregt
    @sregt Před 2 lety +160

    "You have Quakers oats?"
    "No we got Jacob's nuts"
    PLEASE THAT PART GOT ME DYING

  • @justaplaguedoctorroamingthenet
    @justaplaguedoctorroamingthenet Před 10 měsíci +1

    I'm so glad people are repeating the jokes from this video in case I missed any.

  • @IWillSayMyPeace
    @IWillSayMyPeace Před rokem +15

    I'd love to watch these back to back; the brand alternative videos of Steven He (or Sarah She?) are incredibly funny. The guy is a comedy legend already at 20 something.

  • @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache
    @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache Před 2 lety +2584

    "I will send you to Jesus"
    Clerk: Oh you mean Moist Cr1tikal?

  • @rni_
    @rni_ Před 2 lety +667

    "You got ice cream?"
    "We got fire milk"
    this is so good

  • @kronix636
    @kronix636 Před rokem

    The tone when he screamed “BIG HAAARRRRRDDDDDDDHHHHH” Was when I knew he would start dying

  • @omarilewis8545
    @omarilewis8545 Před 8 měsíci +2

    dude when he said "cuwala detor " sorry im still laughing my lungs out so i cant spell proberly hahahaha!!!!

  • @phewgangslomo2478
    @phewgangslomo2478 Před rokem +1134

    I had to pause the video to burst out laughing at
    “Fiiiiiiire Miiilk?!”
    “Jacobs Nuts”
    And “Koala Detour?!” 😂😂😂

  • @Kaehyung
    @Kaehyung Před 2 lety +140

    "We got 5 day depression"
    "WHAT THE HE- they're called week days"
    my favorite part

  • @ZapStrideGaming
    @ZapStrideGaming Před 7 měsíci

    The way you broke saying "that's big hard" got me dying

  • @KINOK028
    @KINOK028 Před rokem

    “It’s like Mountain Dew, but in 4K”
    That got me dying on the floor

  • @hazard_flame7890
    @hazard_flame7890 Před 2 lety +1250

    "Gatorade"
    "Crocodile health"
    "Where this from"
    "Australia"
    That made me laugh so hard🤣🤣

    • @acidicblitzen2072
      @acidicblitzen2072 Před 2 lety +45

      i thought its crocodile help ngl

    • @Ozymandias2x
      @Ozymandias2x Před 2 lety +43

      @@acidicblitzen2072 It is. Gator Ade sounds like Gator Aid, hence Crocodile Help.

    • @joshlikescarcrushers2635
      @joshlikescarcrushers2635 Před rokem +6

      I live in Australia and this is so accurate😂

    • @412Shivangi
      @412Shivangi Před rokem +1

      It was crocodile help for Gator'aid'

    • @StarkSpider24
      @StarkSpider24 Před rokem +1

      Mumbling “Of course… 😒”
      Made me laugh harder than it should.

  • @nicktestorial7945
    @nicktestorial7945 Před 2 lety +843

    "You got quaker oats, no we got Jacob's nuts" that made me laugh so hard

    • @Charged_Creeper6
      @Charged_Creeper6 Před 2 lety +9

      I know SAME!! 😂

    • @PAlouidor
      @PAlouidor Před 2 lety +4

      This one hit me the most I fell out the chair.

    • @FarFromHome91
      @FarFromHome91 Před 2 lety

      ironically we have Jacob's nuts in australia 🤣

    • @FRACp0larFN328
      @FRACp0larFN328 Před rokem

      agreed my hand couldn’t do anything cuz i was laughing so hard

    • @Charlotte-dq2fk
      @Charlotte-dq2fk Před rokem +1

      Do they have Jacob's sausage aswell

  • @ButterflyyBarbie
    @ButterflyyBarbie Před rokem

    “BIGHARD”
    That was so funny it literally hurt

  • @the0wolf15
    @the0wolf15 Před rokem

    "Tournament of Failures" Every Asian dad's worst nightmare

  • @justsomerandomanimefan1135
    @justsomerandomanimefan1135 Před 2 lety +318

    I love how Steven’s dad just summoned the slipper to his hand using his Asian powers

  • @leovaldez680
    @leovaldez680 Před rokem +304

    Seeing his dad yell “BIG HARD” at the top of his lungs broke me 🤣🤣🤣

    • @rysterstech
      @rysterstech Před rokem +3

      They're the same person, hence the bandage in the same spot in both characters

    • @leovaldez680
      @leovaldez680 Před rokem +9

      @@rysterstech I know lmao, I’m talking about the character. That’s a pretty central thing to understand about his content

    • @scphobia
      @scphobia Před rokem +1

      ​@@leovaldez680that's the store employee bro

    • @Valor1610
      @Valor1610 Před rokem

      ​@@rysterstechNah bro its Steven's dad and the store employee what you on about dawg

  • @hannahcrossett3415
    @hannahcrossett3415 Před rokem

    "Fire milk: only from the angriest cows" 🤣

  • @tobiaswood9722
    @tobiaswood9722 Před rokem +4

    The Jacob's nuts got me 😂😂

  • @b3ttr
    @b3ttr Před 2 lety +1316

    Got me dead laughing on the ground when you said “Big Hard”!

    • @schmollanski
      @schmollanski Před 2 lety +71

      In my city there literally is a microsoft call-center named "MegaHard". Germany btw

    • @b3ttr
      @b3ttr Před 2 lety +9

      @@schmollanski hahahaha

    • @Whyyoutubewhy..
      @Whyyoutubewhy.. Před 2 lety +16

      @@schmollanski 😳😳😳

    • @schmollanski
      @schmollanski Před 2 lety +15

      Just as a follow up it actually is certified by Microsoft and the building is painted in the four colors of the Microsoft logo. Gotta go see if I would be able to take a picture since there is like no picture of it online and not even Google Streetview but it is a fair bit away from my home so have to see first.

    • @luciofloresv7207
      @luciofloresv7207 Před 2 lety +8

      BiG HaRd!!!!

  • @jacobrispoli4351
    @jacobrispoli4351 Před rokem +585

    Salesman: We have Tournament of Failures
    Steven's Dad: I'll take five!

  • @u238productions
    @u238productions Před rokem +2

    “We have jacobs nuts” broke me

  • @davidmachemer1015
    @davidmachemer1015 Před rokem +2

    Dude! What did you do to your eye?! Don't hurt yourself doing these videos! They're so hilarious - I'm binging them all!

  • @jafmdiscord1210
    @jafmdiscord1210 Před 2 lety +2064

    "Let me guess, authentic Chinese food, panda express?"
    "..."
    "..."
    "...koala detour"
    "*throws shoe* KOALA DETOUR?!!!"
    fantastic and hilarious

    • @TheBrokenOwl
      @TheBrokenOwl Před 2 lety +38

      A lot of celebrities go there!

    • @gabrielzinho3230
      @gabrielzinho3230 Před 2 lety +20

      KOALAS ARE NOT EVEN CHINESE

    • @MxS1996
      @MxS1996 Před 2 lety +11

      I'm surprised he didn't throw it at "Beeeeeega Haaaaaaad"

    • @natchu96
      @natchu96 Před 2 lety +9

      @@gabrielzinho3230 it has to go down to Australia and back, that's why it's a detour.

    • @fabioformisano2
      @fabioformisano2 Před 2 lety

      Koalaaaaa detooooooouuur!

  • @bodin1912
    @bodin1912 Před 2 lety +334

    The “I will send you to Jesus” line took me by surprise and it made me actually laugh out loud

  • @marioprzz
    @marioprzz Před rokem +6

    0:04 Mountain Dew - Mountain View
    0:21 Gatorade - Crocodile Help
    0:30 Pepsi - Pep Here
    0:37 Cake Cats - Kid Dog
    0:38 Dove Chocolate - Birds
    0:40 Ice Cream - Fire Milk
    0:42 FIRE MILK?!
    0:46 Hershey - He Him
    0:48 Quakers Oh - Jacob's Nut
    0:50 Five Hour Energy - Five Day Depression
    0:52 what da hail..
    1:00 Walmart - Ceiling Mark
    1:03 Trader Joe's - Merchant Bob
    1:07 Microsoft - Big Hard
    1:12 *BIG HAAAAAARD?!*
    1:19 Panda Express - Koala Detour
    1:29 KOALA DETOUR?!!?!?1?!?
    1:34 Not Damon - Carpet Damon
    1:36 i will send you to jesus
    1:41 Call of Duty - Text of Job
    1:43 Fortnite - Fifth Day
    1:45 League of Legends - Tournament Failures
    (the end ig)

  • @gsamalot
    @gsamalot Před rokem +1

    The carpet Damian followed up by i will send you to jesus had me laugbing so hard

  • @masterofalltrades_
    @masterofalltrades_ Před rokem

    His reactions and him getting scared when he sees em is the funniest

  • @ejrocks8076
    @ejrocks8076 Před 2 lety +411

    “It tastes like how Rick Astley sounds.” Literally the best line ever

  • @undeadboyoexe6268
    @undeadboyoexe6268 Před 2 lety +421

    1:36 every time Steven's dad says "I will send you to Jesus" I laugh uncontrollably

  • @Lillyluvsanime
    @Lillyluvsanime Před rokem

    I love the Winnie the Pooh stuffies in the back and the sensory bottle you used for the "Crocodile Help."

  • @WhoStoleDaSweetRoll
    @WhoStoleDaSweetRoll Před měsícem

    The ungodly audio quality when he yells Big Hard gets me every time 😂

  • @solairstudios2443
    @solairstudios2443 Před 2 lety +536

    My favorite gift is after the ads, where we get to see that Steven is a person with feelings, and not just a supercomputer of quality comedy. It always makes me happy to see the bloopers.
    "Thank you for sponsoring this video"
    "KOALA DETOUR!?!"

    • @kinagrill
      @kinagrill Před 2 lety +4

      That sounds more like an australian fastfood restaurant.

  • @slygun451
    @slygun451 Před rokem +380

    “I will send you to jesus” should be your merchandise. I’d wear that hat/shirt

    • @insanityplea5502
      @insanityplea5502 Před rokem +9

      With a slipper in a hand!

    • @krithikasaikrishnan622
      @krithikasaikrishnan622 Před rokem +9

      We demand this merch, Steven. Stop being a failure and make it happen!!!!

    • @That_one_bitch_16
      @That_one_bitch_16 Před rokem +1

      That's what my mom said to me when I messed up in front of the family

    • @TheWPhilosopher
      @TheWPhilosopher Před rokem +1

      ​@@krithikasaikrishnan622hasn't opened a business with one foot.

  • @Ray_ToxicR
    @Ray_ToxicR Před rokem

    "You have Fruit Loops?"
    "Nah we got Vegetable Hoops"

  • @korrainomad365
    @korrainomad365 Před 2 měsíci

    Watched this for the first time while high. I'm still crying and my nonexistent abs hurt 🤣

  • @grate5463
    @grate5463 Před 2 lety +203

    0:49 "We've got 5 day depression. It called Weekdays" That just summarizes our entire human life and existence.

  • @JCSwishMan33
    @JCSwishMan33 Před 2 lety +1368

    "You got Dove chocolate?"
    "We got *B I R D*."
    I don't know why, but the delivery just SLAYED me.

  • @DaliaChan_Yuni
    @DaliaChan_Yuni Před 8 měsíci

    ‘Fire milk’ got me 😂

  • @Kurtz791
    @Kurtz791 Před 7 měsíci

    "We have Jacobs nuts" That got me laughing😂😂😂😂

  • @TurqueWithTheMicrophone
    @TurqueWithTheMicrophone Před 2 lety +152

    “You got Burger King?”
    “We got Pizza Queen.”
    “You got Dollar Tree?”
    “We got Quarter Bush.”
    “You got McDonald’s?”
    “We got McDavid’s.”

    • @keithkunikida1222
      @keithkunikida1222 Před 2 lety +18

      “You got Kentucky Fried Chicken?”
      “We got Utah Steamed Beef.”

    • @PianoCrab
      @PianoCrab Před 2 lety +16

      "You got Pizza Hut?"
      "We got Calzone Shack."

    • @eirdonne_
      @eirdonne_ Před 2 lety +18

      "You got Taco Bell?"
      "We got Burrito Chime."
      "You got Starbucks?"
      "We got Sundollars."

    • @normalhuman9878
      @normalhuman9878 Před 2 lety +3

      I mean I got Queen’s Pizza

    • @Scott_mans
      @Scott_mans Před 2 lety +6

      “Do you have Ocean Spray?”
      “No we have Lake Squirt.”

  • @TheYumpster
    @TheYumpster Před 2 lety +152

    1:12 "BIG HARD" Sounds like a heavy duty hardware store.

    • @deeznutzbackwards
      @deeznutzbackwards Před 2 lety +6

      BIG HAAAARD??! makes me laugh all the time

    • @masongaming58
      @masongaming58 Před rokem +7

      BIIGA HAAAAAARDA
      sounds like something an anime character would scream

    • @tredI9100
      @tredI9100 Před 7 měsíci

      Bigcomputer Hardware

  • @ambro3747
    @ambro3747 Před rokem +2

    "You got Hersheys "
    We got he him's..
    This one got me.. 😂

  • @jamesrogers2780
    @jamesrogers2780 Před rokem

    Hello kitty?
    Goodbye puppy.
    Ghost rider?
    Spirit transport.
    Now you got me doing it 🤣

  • @nolansmith8261
    @nolansmith8261 Před 2 lety +359

    “You got Skyrim?”
    “We got GroundCenter.”
    “Fine, I’ll just go to target.”
    “Oh, you mean Arrow!”
    “I will send you to Jesus.”
    “We got Susej.”
    “What da hail?!?”
    “We got what the heaven?”

    • @SugaryStarzie
      @SugaryStarzie Před 2 lety +22

      You got assassin's creed?
      No we got medic's club

    • @itza_bag6496
      @itza_bag6496 Před 2 lety +10

      “You got Roblox?”
      “We got Orspherez”

    • @WEENUS157
      @WEENUS157 Před 2 lety +14

      You got minecraft?
      No we go blockplacer

    • @ceferinomontagna438
      @ceferinomontagna438 Před 2 lety +6

      @@WEENUS157 digbuild

    • @itskaiks3469
      @itskaiks3469 Před 2 lety +3

      I WILL SEND YOU TO JESUS “you mean hesus?” (How Mexicans say Jesus)

  • @lordofshibainus
    @lordofshibainus Před 2 lety +43

    Please- Are we not gonna talk about:
    “You got Hershey?”
    “We got he/him”

  • @Mattplayz-xp7wv
    @Mattplayz-xp7wv Před 8 měsíci +1

    I love the way he grabs a random water bottle

  • @crystalcarls489
    @crystalcarls489 Před 9 měsíci +2

    “We got 5 day depression”
    Me: I’m definitely buying that!

  • @scavengersix2161
    @scavengersix2161 Před 2 lety +250

    "We have Tournament of Failures."
    You can see the gears turning behind his eyes, like "That must be the game Steven plays on his Playstation!"

  • @RushWheeler
    @RushWheeler Před 2 lety +233

    Steven just trying his best to hold in his laughter when saying Big Hard is the highlight of this video.

  • @crimsondragoon8197
    @crimsondragoon8197 Před 4 měsíci +1

    "I will send you to Jesus" gets me every time😂

  • @user-dv3yb6gt1e
    @user-dv3yb6gt1e Před rokem +1

    It's so funny when he says "Koala Detour!"

  • @samhamplayz3251
    @samhamplayz3251 Před 2 lety +514

    "You got ice cream?"
    "We got fire milk."
    "Fire Milk?"
    "Comes from the angriest cows." I nearly died lol.

  • @ariannamcfarland4436
    @ariannamcfarland4436 Před 2 lety +464

    Salesman: "We have Tournament of Failures."
    Steven's Dad: "Shut up and take my monies!" 😂

    • @d0sky
      @d0sky Před rokem +5

      Literally rebranded the ranked experience

    • @speedstick8981
      @speedstick8981 Před rokem +5

      “Actually it’s called nomies”

  • @owenjefferies416
    @owenjefferies416 Před 10 měsíci

    "Its like mountain dew but in 4k" haha😂😂😂😂😂