How to Talk with a White Supremacist | Simon Tam | TEDxUCR
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- čas přidán 23. 07. 2015
- Simon Tam and his all Asian band, entered a maximum security prison, filled with white supremacists, to play a concert, expecting the worst to happen. In this surprising and heartfelt talk, Simon shares his story of what happens when you take a moment to really have a conversation with another person.
Simon Tam is an award-winning musician, best-selling author, entrepreneur, and social justice activist.
Simon is best known as the founder and bassist of The Slants, the world’s first and only all-Asian American dance rock band. His approach to activism through the arts has been highlighted in thousands of media features across 82 countries, including: BBC World News, NPR, TIME Magazine, TED talks, NBC, and the New York Times.
Since 2000, he has been a performer, presenter, and keynote at events and organizations such as TEDx, SXSW, Comic-Con, The Department of Defense, Stanford University, Rotary International, and over 1,200 others across North America, Europe, and Asia.
You can find Simon's appearance schedule, writing, and current projects at: www.simontam.biz
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx
why is no one talking about how smooth his voice is omg
GHOST DATA but it is a little quiet right ?
Just that you and I noticed how smooth Simon's voice is , is a step in the right direction. Others will notice!
Very soothing
I was thinking this was an excerpt from an audiobook
..Perhaps the subject matter is more important/interesting.
he's a natural at Non-violent Communication. very admirable
because asian males are feminine
Van Alt Your comment is unfair... Personality is not belong to a race but belong to each individual
so Bruce Lee was feminine? yeah right one inch punch the crap out of everyone hahaha
"non -violent communication" what is that ?
Do blacks sound violent in communication ?
You are the reason racism is still an issue
from www.cnvc.org (there's a book about this too. hopefully this site will give you a bit more clarification. I love this concept. it has absolutely changed my life)
"NVC begins by assuming that we are all compassionate by nature and that violent strategies-whether verbal or physical-are learned behaviors taught and supported by the prevailing culture. NVC also assumes that we all share the same, basic human needs, and that each of our actions are a strategy to meet one or more of these needs."
I come to these videos for the comments. Who's with me?
This should be called how to talk to any human being.
No because white supremacists don't qualify as human
@@jerrygraves6531 This is going in my quote book.
@@jerrygraves6531 You missed the point of this talk
*with
I think he's right. I work in a government position that requires me to talk to a lot of people. When people said ridiculous things that I knew were misinformed, I used to fight fire with fire. But I realised that this approach rarely worked as it seemed that both me and them would just become more entrenched in our positions. My colleagues have found that if you take abuse but not response to it strongly, and let people get it out of their system, a space opens up for more reasonable discussion
I have also found if you do find a single little thing to agree on, the other person is a whole lot more likely to listen to what you have to say.
revaholic You're justifying bullying and abuse.
That's a very simplistic conclusion to come to. Unfortunately when you work in certain lines of work, people unfairly throw angry, unreasonable remarks at you. I am sharing my experience that fighting fire with fire did not make the conversation any more productive, so unfortunately sometimes you have to bite your tongue and let people vent a bit. Of course, in an ideal world that person would not come in and spew vitriol right off the bat.
revaholic Hope that they let you retire early
revaholic: I definitely agree. To make peace and conversation, sometimes you have to be the better person, because somebody has to.
You beautiful BRAVE young man. Your voice is as soothing as you are! THANK YOU! We are ALL guilty of assumptions and judgments at some point in our lives! Those of you who commented on him playing for a Prison. I too volunteered with my parents and brother in singing in the Prisons. The Inmates looked so forward to our coming. It boosts morale, not just for them, but also the guards, just remember some are criminals, some have made just one mistake, some are innocent! Hope he becomes the NEXT PRESIDENT!! ☺️
Perhaps a more accurate title might have been: How To Talk To Human Beings: Asking questions before drawing conclusions?
It seems simple enough... people get degrees in this field.... and people still argue over misunderstandings. There's a lot humanity doesn't know about communication.
There is ALWAYS the question, when speaking with another person, "Are you going to simply attack them, or are you going to encourage real, considerate communication with someone else?"
and this guy certainly attacked non-stop with slander "muh white supremist"
The funny thing about all of the responses to the hate comments is that they are going against the video too. The whole point was to ask questions and understand why they are that way, but all of the responses are just retaliation against them without caring why they feel that way.
Jacob Nelson I’m not going to sit here and explain why white countries should remain white or race realism to brain dead liberals
why not?
I've been taking this approach for decades. It takes more effort and energy to engage in this form. It also puts a toll on your body, and my family members call me foolish to waste my time/ energy with my methodology. The speaker and I are the ones who are called idealists. But without people like us, the world would be a worst place than it is.
13/50
Thumbs up for a thought provoking video! Thanks for sharing!
Very articulate man!!
That is why jewish run TED X hired him
If someone thinks my family is more prone to crime because of skin color I’m not exactly feeling enticed to listen to them tell me about my biological inferiority. Sorry, but I enjoy talking to intelligent and aware people, not cretons from another time. Thank you for doing what I’m not willing or capable of. You’re twice the person I am.
I'm sorry dude we people of color have been listening for years and it's still the same lie.all they want you to do is listen and believe.and you're not really his focus in the conversation so he will talk with you.maybe he needs to listen more and talk less.its really a guilt thing he has .I can/could explain all of that but not in texting to you .but good luck on watering down racism.
13/50
When I first heard he played at a prison, my first reaction was irritation. Why should prisoners get live entertainment? Why should they get so many of the things which law abiding people sometimes can't even afford? Towards the end, I started to question my position on this issue. Maybe that white supremacist and many others at that prison really needed this life experience.
Great to hear people are learning from his talk😊. We all could use his advice!
Prisoners are human too bro...You think they should just be miserable all the time? A lot of prisoners are in their cause they made one mistake that landed them in there...
@@janisrogers4934 and eventually they get out (most). Too often ex convicts say they only learned how to be better criminals in prison. Society doesnt realize that by "punishing" ppl to the extreme they often end up hurting themselves in the long run when prisoners are released
The us vs them attitude is always dangerous
love this talk.
Thank you Sir
So important & very true.
2015 was my first time working in Jefferson Indiana , I meet several people we talked and I meet a real kkk member who told me Indiana was were the kkk began. We have are different points of view and I was able to get him to practice aikido in Kentucky. He is changing one day at a time. I am from Downey California
Beautiful peace work. Thank you.
OH MY GOD HIS VOICE IS SO SOOTHING!
I just don't talk, if I don't have to. And if I have to bark back then I do so. Plain & Simple, regardless who it is.
I'm disappointed reading most (not all) of the top comments. A lot of assumptions instead of questions :/
Very inspiring talk! Thank you Simon for doing what you do!
Awesome!
he's a good man
Andrew Yang and Pete Buttigieg would be PERFECT
Nuclear Energy is THE only way to go for CLEAN Energy....
I think an important distinction to make is WHO is initiating conversation, questions, and listening? WHO is meeting who where they are? How does one respond when they are being asked the questions?
great job
Communication is key. Period.
Lovely speech.
If he tells sleeping story, I would love to listen to him more. Smooth and sound.
Thank you!
Well I found his views interesting. As a Jehovah witness, we meet so many different people and cultures. And it's always a blessing when we can meet someone and find good and commons things. Whether an atheist, or devout spiritual person, or anyone else I love talking to people, finding out about their views and what they are concerned about. And they find a little bit out about me too. And hopefully I can leave them with a smile knowing someone cared about them without trying to convert them.
Very powerful
The audio on this Ted must be set on "bedroom voice".
We're not confusing ideologies with people. We're noticing a trend.
Trends are not individuals though. That's what he's saying.
People don't act without reasons. Get to those root reasons. Uproot them (gently), and then you will change them.
I think that is a tenet in his overarching message - by gently offering alternative information, it allows them the chance to not get defensive, thereby absorbing the information, offering more about their own views, and ultimately facilitating change :)
@@hannahjacole You mean, non-aggressive renegotiation?
@@Navesblue I guess you could also word it that way. The term & specific practice is just called "nonviolent communication" by therapists & coaches.
@@Navesblue the point is if you find something common and start from this point, you will be able have more fruitful conversation. It works everywhere, from sales to criminals.
This is quite an interesting approach. As a woman of color, it can be exhausting to have to constantly have to present evidence for our humanity, plead for others to understand that we deserve empathy, and ultimately to stay alive. But I do see the value in being a good listener, because it first requires to fill your heart with love and understanding in order to have a healthy exchange. And really it can be good for both parties in that you may leave the conversation with a lighter heart, and not broken and angry from the animosity.
Still though, does this help in addressing the pressing issues of deaths from anti blackness? Is this ultimately productive in that battle? I'm still figuring it out
+Amenhotep Pimpernel III While I get what you're trying to say, it's a bit presumptuous to think that China would help Asian Americans if there were mass crimes against those of Chinese descent in this country. It's happened before, many times (including massacres of Chinese people in my own state of Oregon) and we've had more anti-immigration laws against Chinese than any other country, but China did nothing for it.
That being said, it's true that my experience as a person of color is going to be different than yours (and I know that anti-blackness in this country is very strong, just as it is with anti-first Nations). But even within that, approaching issues with compassion is always a priority. And just because this talk is grounded in interpersonal racism, it doesn't mean that one can't fight institutional or systemic racism at the same time either. They're all important. And the solutions for fighting these is as diverse as all of our communities who want justice
Simon Tam
"Person of color" is not a good term.
Michael Cooper she has the right to refer to herself as she pleases.
Jermaine Edwards
Of course
isabelle happyfeet I agree but the fact is most white supremacist will never be reasonable and understanding, they are proud of their hate and our pain if it's in conversation or action gives them delight.
This could be a reasonable approach if you are trying to “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;”
Destiny got destroyed in this debate.
Realise this can go both ways...
Yes, communication generally is intended to work that way, as a bi- or multidirectional system/process, rather than talking to/at someone. That's why he clarifies "with" because both parties are equally valued.
Crying 😢
Place the seeds of doubt and if the seeds don't tear apart your assumptions as they grow then your in good shape
Those who are hardest to love, are the ones who need it the most. BTW-I love this guy from The Slants. Rock on
Homie!
i know how you use your vocal cords in harmony with ur mouth to create vocalisations interpreted as words
This is SO powerful
'as long as we treat debates as one side wins and one side loses, people will never be interested in conceding their position.'
working hard and living in a country with opportunities is not a direct line to success, and for blacks in america it's not necessarily the land of opportunities like it is for white but obviously their is always exceptions to the rule I'm talking in general. to say America is the best country in the world for opportunities is ridiculous just because it's a believed cultural sentiment does not make it factual but what ever makes you sleep better at night and makes you feel prouder about your nationality.
Jermaine Edwards you know what you could do? Move to any country in Africa and create something for yourself instead of demanding that whites do it for you. Here’s another one for you if you hate whites so much why are you living in a white country created by whites for whites why are you using our technology, medicine etc. why do t you detach yourself from everything white and I mean everything and return to your motherland?
because its from stolen land apparently
His voice is very nice. (Not to mention how attractive he is!)
Whose up for making a video titled: How to Talk with Liberals about how Racially Aware Whites are not Supremacists
Prejudice is human behaviour all over, But with a door wide open if the chance given, to change.
Unfortunately Racism is a class of it´s own, hopeless and self destructive
Bravo! Thank you, Simon, for enlightening us with your perspective.
It really comes down to what a people put most of their time into. If you put a lot of time into sports you will tend to perfect it more than someone else. Just like putting a lot of time into gaining knowledge, the martial arts or anything else. Different cultures or nations of people just put more time into doing different things and may have perfected that thing more than another culture or race of people. I'm explaining this in a simple way, but hopefully this is not over someones head to not get, that it is a lot of truth to this observation (analogy). Then also diet may play a part. There are different types of edible vegetation on the planet that some people had access to that other tribes of people didn't have access to. Every tribe depending on where they settled on the planet had more access to something that other people didn't have access to. And this may have played a part that gives groups of people an edge over each other, in some way or another. If your (culture or people) put a lot of time into a particular thing, you will perfect that thing more than someone else or other nations of people. But this doesn't make you superior to other people. Why? Because someone is better than you are with something else. Being superior to other people is really a man made illusion. Only God is the superior one. Until you can create the universe like God, then you can never be superior to anyone on the planet.
This is a liberating yet countercultural stance. This is the only way we'll be saved. This is Christ like love.
Christ like love... so he would curse a fig tree for not carrying fruits out of season and rampage through the temple?
I'm interested in the reason why you hold such hostility against Jesus Christ as described in the Bible, because usually people would give much more apparently horrible things God or Jesus had done. The fig tree and temple stories aren't nearly as popular.
If this is already hostility to you... However, because these examples are less often used I use them. I mean sure I could have used some examples from Revelations or if you want to include Yahwe, from Exodus etc. But why repeat the same thing everyone else does?
I think you are exactly right. There is such a thing called Christ-like hate, or God's wrath. God is a loving God but definitely not a lovely one.
JenPac Shakur, Are you a subject matter expert on Biblical interpretation? Are you relying on someone who is?
It seems that you are making the egregious mistake of using a quote completely out of context and then assuming that you know more about the proper interpretation of the Bible and the words of Christ than virtually all other subject matter experts past and present that don't come to the conclusion that you do about the meaning of that quote because they actually take the context into account.
"Race is a social construct."
Wow I bet that really challenged his preconceived notions what a great argument
well, historically, given that scientist tried to connect race with biology, yes, it might come to a shock to some people that it's purely a sociological construct with no connections to biology. A history lesson might have challenged your preconceived notions but that's none of my business.
Differences in skin color doesn't make any biological arguments. Are tanned people different from non-tanned people?
@@waseemh.a.5291 plz educate us.
Thanks Janis I just put in my two cents just like everyone here
@@waseemh.a.5291 No I want to here the history lesson that supports your position.
I always find it illuminating to have a person whose own ethnicity maintains a rigid ethnostate in their country of origin talk about how "white supremacists" are the real racists.
Do you have proof the Chinese have exported "Chinese Racism" like whites have worldwide? I think not.
Whites have exported Chinese racism?
Nah Chinese don't care about mixing ethnicities because the Chinese Han culture is the one that dominates them anyway.
@@electric8668 explanation this concept of exported racism plz.
Step 1. Don't label people nazi's because you don't agree with them.
6:32 I am so guilty of that. This guy is very erudite without sounding extreme or blaming all white people for racism, and his band rocks too.
Check out Colin Flaherty
I loved the talk, and it was great..., but, am I the only one who think this man's voice is very sexy?? 😁
I always felt that the John Coltrane Quartet should have ended racism. It encompasses MLK and more.
This is truly hilarious. Go to China or Japan and talk to normal everyday people and you will be shocked by their blatant prejudice which to them is normal. You won't see this character doing that. No he thinks its a good idea to do it in the most PC controlled country on earth. Asians are hugely successful in America so where is the prejudice?
because he is a parasite
He is from neither China nor Japan, so he wouldn't have any more special insight into the enormous racism over there than you. Also, he did not talk about racism against asian-americans, which, yes, is so minor that no one bothers talking about it.
You dont talk to them at all. That's how you do it.
This will only increase your ignorance! A savvy question would ask questions.
Hey, isn't this the "hey... hey... hey... this is library - guy"?
I had to skip 8 minutes to listen to the story.
fix the audio.
an all Asian band called the slants..
I can't believe they recast this guy, he was white in Firefly.
Dude thats how i think,did you take my brain...? Or is it what we are supposed to do, in order to UNDERSTAND...
Hmm. Very informative indeed. However, I'll just pull a Dave Chappelle on em.
It isn't what you say it's what you mean.
I am allways right and you are allways wrong, = everyone
Is this the first firefly reference? Cause otherwise I'm disappointed
If this guy went to Portland Oregon he'd realize what racism is. Just ask Andy Ngo
The only noteworthy talk at this event.
It's not the color is the culture
When can we expect Mr. Tam to visit 96% ethnic Han Chinese China?
?
91.51% *
Regardless - What does this have to do with the talk of race in China? Why should China's stance, whatever it may be, be an acceptable excuse for any other nation to grow complacent in their own independent efforts? Why should we be trying to match our values to those who don't live in our countries? Last I heard, China was its own country, and other countries, such as the US and the UK, are different and have some different values. This question is wholly irrelevant.
TheKarret exactly👏👏 the wording was perfect
Ty~ I noticed I typed have twice at the end there, so I slightly improved by replacing the first one with and. lmaao. But yeah, pretty moot point for OP to make.
"Alice - Your grades are low, you need to go study more"
"But Moooom! Bobby's parents don't make _him_ study!"
That's what the argument sounds like to me.
Good talk...youth is malleable.
As a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I appreciate your work and how you shared your experience with your friend
Wasn't Eric Garner the guy saleing cigarettes illegally on the corner (agents the law) & refused to comply with the officers? Granted I don't agree with how it went down, but if instead of arguing with the officers. Knowing he was breaking the law, he may be alive today.
YEH U WOULD C IT THAT WAY. AND U DO LIKE HOW IT WENT DOWN. GOD AND HIS SON JESUS WILL NOT C IT UR WAY. NEVER. 👀
Laughing about the cup of tea and drugs conversation with the stranger Mormon visitor context... Nobody seemed to get that.
Buuuuuuuuuuut really, you can't have a worthy discussion unless you READ the source material.Would you go a whole semester without reading any of the background material the teacher tells you to?
just go online, there are forums, lol
Our family/stepmother did the same with jehova, where they got invited in and they would have to accept to listen to our religion first before they would be able to tell us about their religion. And that works with all fanatic ppl you dont want to have on your door. Because if they are fanatic they will not listen to you in any way if its not their way. So if they will not accept to hear your version why should you listen to their version, it just shows they are a cult if they cant accept other ppls views. And by doing this they will not come back.
TEDx has managed to become a parody of itself.
Why not make decency and respect your strength and your unifying goal? Those virtues transcend race and that's what Jesus is all about. Where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom and peace. Tolerating evil is not decent or respectful. What is evil? People who seek to harm, maim, and kill are evil. Live according to the spirit of YAH and His Son and you will be on the right road. Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.
intelligent young man
Wow. That prisoner I would hug that man. What’s his cell number and address I need to write him a letter. I was serious then I realized I said cell number and I really meant it. 🤒
Dangit thought I was going to see Simon Tam from Firefly.
How to Talk with a Unicorn next week on Funtube.
...I mean, I'd watch that. Unicorns are cool.
who is this dude?
actually, i dont care
What he doesn’t understand is white people, no matter their station, see America as their land. That prisoner still saw himself as. “True American” while the rest of the “brown world” would just have to live in his beneficence.Sorry don’t want to ruin a good feels moment but as a white person from the south who grew up surrounded by this “white supreme” culture , we could admire non white peoples but we would never dare seen them as on par with us. The autograph moment was touching but don’t be fooled by it. I’ve seen it many times, they were getting the autograph of a person who could do something well but would never be as socially esteemed as they are, even a convicted felon. Just being honest.
You inadvertently just described how a lot of Asian people view foreigners.
@@thegreatergood8081 in china you cant even get citizenship even if you marry a native. You cannot even adopt a chinese child even if you are married to a chinese person and live in china.
Imagine, and aerial drone, over looking China, or Tokyo it happens with them, what would , e
This is called morality... Political and scientific and even economic systems cannot replace it, and as long as we have differing views on morality, our basic operating systems cannot communicate, and violence ensues. Is that retro? lol
Hey it is interesting, about the clothing to ID you - that proves that they do not value the lives of the prisoners (even by policy). Wasn't aware of that.
Hey! I'm a Mormon!
k
You use sign language . I only know two words though. left and right. Over and over again.
Try not too
Hard to here what's he saying
His voice is so calming. I would love to hear him say Confucius sayings and quotes
I challenge anybody to google Murders of Christopher Newsom and Channon Christian and then listen to this.
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