The hardest part for me was the realization that they were just mirroring me all along. There was was no mutual interest. They made themselves into my perfect love interest only to tell me after the discard that they were never really that person.
Sequence of evolving: 1. Attraction to this person. 2. Being asked to be there. 3. Doing things for them only. 4. Being berated for nothing. while....your helping them. 5. You give benifit of doubt after benifit of doubt. 6. Comments are getting abusive. 7. They had a loss, give them a break. ( btw - so have you but don't treat anyone like shit ) 8. Your still doing serious supply. 9. Your in cog diss and a brain fog. 10. You do your homework. 11. Wth. Narcissism? Tic all boxes. 12. You've realized what you have allowed is self abuse. 13. You self reflect and discern absolute certainty. 14. No contact is not an option. 15. You are recovering. 16. You chance a reunification. 17. Your pounded quicker and harder. 18. Reality- This is textbook narc 101. 19. Your denial is vaporized. 20. You begin your journey with the affects. 21. Months go by with clarity leading the way. 22. Your starting to feel alive again. 23. Your never alone because you like who your with. 24. That shit will never, ever happen again. 25. You don't "need" anyone.
Mind blowing accuracy, well done. My favorite part of my recovery was the "vaporized... lol" denial and subsequent full-throttle lean into fact gathering, asset protecting, child protecting, money saving and hiring a great divorce attorney. Once your upper brain identifies this oxygen consumer as a narcissist, it takes the wheel from your empathetic heart and goes into survival mode. Gather your facts. Save everything. Keep a journal. Record conversations if you can. Reveal what their sadistic version of reality so desperately desires to keep hidden... the truth. Get out. Stay out. Never look back. Become enlightened once again.
As soon as we started dating he started saying I love you and was annoyed I would not say it back. He immediately started going to my family fundamentalist church from a non religious background. I was only 17 and was so flattered. After 40 years I find out I am not the problem
My brother was always innocently looking for information and just wanted to talk. After a few times of falling into his trap, I realized “I’m just curious” was a dead giveaway! Yes, narcs plan everything ahead.
My family is so messed up now because of all the games my narc-mother played while she was alive. Pancreatic cancer finally got her but I don't think the family bonds will ever recover. There is so much animosity and blaming among those that are left. The hatred and competition is cut-throat.
I experienced ALL of these 10 mind games with the ex psychopathic narc! I am currently having therapy for PTSD. Unless someone has experienced it they really can't understand the level of damage they cause.Your videos are so validating! Thank you soo much!!Lots of love..❤❤
I'm in therapy for the same.. My narc called 911 when I went no contact. It never stops. Now she is sending expensive gifts and acting like they have done nothing. Stay strong.
@@sinjinmonsoon9055 Your right they stop at nothing.He would always come back and act like his done nothing wrong.I have had to change all my contact details and relocate to a different city,to get away from him! They really are dangerous and crazy as hell!
Most people in narc relations lack an understanding about it, which keeps them in these toxic relationships. If you don't know, you can't do better. You'll be amazed at how many people are unaware of psychological effects at the hands of others. They chalk their behavior up as a coincidence, or blame themselves
Throw it back at them into their lap. You’ll quickly be deemed lousy supply. They’ll take off fast. Stay on that course. Block on all avenues. Including dumping common friends. Do a spring cleaning. Purge ALL common connections.
Pretend ignorance! Oh my God, that's a galler. How many people have said something like 'everybody knows this' or 'no one would ever think that' only to have the narc. spin around and suddenly become extremely literal and gaslight you on the use these expressions. Many times with my covert narcissist ex-husband I would end up so frustrated, nearly out of my mind, and screaming "Am I speaking Chinese????"
This is what I have been going through with my narcissist wife. After being married for 8 years now, I am in the final discard stage of being divorced. It hurts to think that your whole relationship was a huge lie. I helped raise her daughter who is autistic and we have a son together. To have been manipulated all this time and know that she never ever had any type of true love for you hurts to your soul. But GOD is good because HE has been pulling her mask off and keeping me and the children at the same time. Keep exposing these wicked people. You are a blessing to us all. GOD will deliver us and deal with the narcissists in our lives.
Bingo. Jill, I have been dealing with all these mindgames. So recognizable. My covert narcissist ex partner played her part perfectly and I fell for it. I am happy that I ended the relationship 18 months ago. It was a relationship of only eight months but I had the feeling that it lasted five years. It was just one huge fake show. In the end I saw her façade and flaws. It was to good to be true. I learned a lot about myself afterwards. Don't take it personal. It is not personal what the narcissist is doing to you.
Just wait until a narcissist tries to convince you that you're a narcissist. Makes you feel nuts. Its hard to differentiate whether you're capable of good judgment anymore.
So true. My soon to be ex is a BPD and narcissist. She always throws something else in a discussion to cloud the issue. Plus has a convenient loss of memory when it comes to agreements we made. Thanks for all that you do for us sufferes of their abuse.
Crazy?! The diagnoser (who's never went to school for any kind of psychology training or studies) they read stuff online so that means they can diagnose me, but they won't be that dumb to really do that and diagnose me, but God damn it don't you dare tell them they're wrong! ✌😶🌺 I really need to stop abusing them!
Everything you say describes my relationship! 5 days. I’m so lost . I can’t believe the time I invested , the time I wasted , I can’t believe the strong me has now became so weak and believed everything this man said! To find out he has been married our entire ten years is so devastating . He even told me he was never going to tell me he was married and living with his wife.I can’t believe my life. Thank you for these videos because I’m trying to understand my life now ! I’m trying to pick up the pieces!
I would disagree. Parents should have taught their children this. I don't think the government is smart enough to do this. Just look at how many get caught cheating / stealing / etc. Not saying they don't take advantage of it. And why do we blame schools for a lot of things. For my son I taught him to learn and to question things he hears. There is a lot of BS out there. Learn to find the truth even if it is uncomfortable.
About four months ago my narc began to now financially abuse me - withholding money - hoarding it. This too is abuse and I rarely hear it spoken on any channels but it’s meant to make you feel totally helpless to demean you! It’s a horrible feeling having to beg for money for bills. Yes we are divorcing. Thank God Alighty that He made a way for me to get out!!! Thank you Jill for continuing to enlighten the world of this damaging and devastating disorder called NPD. xoxo
There's nothing worse then having to beg for money to take care of basic needs. Having to ask for money from someone that's degrading you and making you feel worthless is incredibly abusive and hits you at your core. Hope your getting out asap🌟
Jackie James - Thank you Jackie for completing understand exactly what I am experiencing. It’s such a horrible feeling deep from within. And although we are in the middle of a divorce I won’t be able to leave then either. You see he was in a car accident and stands to walk away with a lot of money and I mean a lot. Of course I’m getting screwed in that too yet I will get $500 a week, 10% of what he nets and have my car paid off. Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful I am getting anything for he could have left me penniless but my point is, he claims he cannot afford to live alone and pay me my $500 when the divorce is finalized therefore we have to stay together way after the divorce until this settlement comes in. If I leave after the divorce with only the $500, he will make sure I never know about that settlement and he will also make sure I don’t get my 10% or car paid off so I am literally stuck with him for a good 6-8 more months, if not longer. He never financially abused me before and we were married for 30 years so I don’t know what brought this on with him but he’s most definitely hoarding money for he’s now away for 2 full weeks at a motel. He claims he’s there bc he doesn’t want to get me sick. Please, I have had enough of his lies to last me a lifetime! The point is he does have the money and he is now using money as a form of manipulation, control and fear. He really does suck as a person and I for one cannot wait for this all to be over. I can promise him one thing, he will never ever hear from me ever again for I will go no contact as soon as I’m in my own place. Thank you for understanding!! Hugs 🤗
Jane Yost - Jane, if there’s any way to sneak $5 or $10 bucks here and there from him, do so!! That’s what I did. When I would go food shopping, it would ask if I wanted cash back. I always hit yes, sometimes taking $20, sometimes $40 and sometimes $60. Walmart allows up to $100 but that would look too obvious especially if your narc checks the bank account like mine does. That’s why I stuck to only taking $20 at a time for the most part. Before I knew it, over the course of a few months (about 4 months) I had $3000 saved. I couldn’t believe it. I also would ask him for money to pay the bills and would always make the price higher so if my water bill was $60, I would tell him I need $100 and pocket that money. Also, if you’re in any position I highly recommend getting a job, even a small part time job delivering pizzas which pay you an hourly rate as well as tips. Whatever you do, try your best not to fight with him bc they get off on that. They want us to fight with them. Shut down the conversation by walking away. Study and research everything you can about narcissism so you know what you are up against. Trust me, I am the most passive person who despises confrontation so on that fateful day when he deliberately provoked me waking me 3 times I got mad but he got even madder. Go figure, right? He was cursing and yelling on the top of his lungs trying to scare me, trying to intimidate me but I sat and listened to him fight all by himself. I never said a word until he was done and that’s when I finally stood up for myself and said: you will never ever treat or talk to me that way ever again! A few days later I got the discard and it was so cold and callous as if 30 years meant absolutely nothing to him and the sad part of it all, it didn’t mean anything to him. I was just here to use and abuse. Plus I already knew he had hooked up with a new supply but I didn’t care - my love for him had stopped years ago. My point is to try your best to save any little bit of money. Stash it away until you do have enough for a bank account. Do you have young children or any children? Is it possible for you to get a small part time job? I’m here if you need to talk so please don’t hesitate if you need someone to talk with. I will be praying for you. PS- I believe the reason why a majority of women stay is bc lack of funds. I know I sure wouldn’t have stayed 30 years if I was able to support myself. I’m still not really able to and he’s already made it clear that he refuses to pay me what’s in our divorce ($500 a week). Well he will soon be in contempt of court and I will take him to court if I have to. Also depending on the state and how long you’ve been married, you may be entitled to alimony. Please don’t loose hope bc if I am able to get through this, I know anyone can. And again, if you just need someone to listen to you, I am here for you. Blessings to you, sending my love and hugs through the miles. ♥️
I think that people may need to understand, too, that the reason why narcissists are so persistent, is because it’s not simply that you’re their little project to play with and because narcissism, particularly the NPD form of it (meeting 5 of the 9 criteria), is because doing what they do is a belief system. Belief systems are, I gather, much like religion. If you’ve ever tried swaying someone from their religious beliefs, although not that you should, you’ll likely be quite unsuccessful. NPD is a defense mechanism. They HAVE to believe in what they’re doing and, in turn, they HAVE to believe in the roles that they, you and and others play in their lives. If that means you’re life is destroyed, as far as they’re concerned, there’s no problem with that and you’ve likely earned it. Whatever gets them to their goal.
They use flying monkeys too to get back at you. It's sad that flying monkeys go along with it. Narcs have tremendous control on others. Do they have special powers?
I have 4 siblings. There is huge scope for triangulation. Now that enabler dad is dead she has full rein to pull strings constantly. "I don't remember that" "I did no such thing" and on and on.... then has the nerve to complain that her kids are not speaking to each other- mom you brought this on yourself, then she can't help but smirk.
@@dontbelongherefromanother no. There are just too many pathological people who pathologicallyy attach to each other and produce pathological masses. Think of the nazis.
I experienced almost all 10 of those behaviors. What I think will serve me will looking forward is to look for those first few with wide eyed clarity... over the top compliments, suddenly being in line with everything important to me and taking digs at old relationships and what may seem like cute digs about me and my life under the heading of "just kidding". The rest are important of course, but those will show up earlier, at least in my experience.
It just amazes me how much time they invest in sabatoging people lives and in the end they sabotage theirs the most. Thats a low I pray that all that recognize they abuse be thankful you made it out.
This is true. My mother has spent so much time concentrating on making others miserable that she has no friends left, the neighbours won't speak to her, she has made no plans for her old age- just assumes others will take care of it. It sounds horrible but she really deserves to be in one of the ghastlier homes. This woman was very abusive to animals as well as people.
I couldn’t count the number of times that I was ready to take my life, over these things, that I just couldn’t wrap my head around, that my wife had been doing to me for the last 6 years 😭😭😭
@@petekdemircioglu Glad you are still with us 🙏. No matter how bad things seem at the time, there are always better times and things to look forward to ❤️
Narcs #1 reason for living is supply, then control, they will pull supply in a way that you may not notice and that will keep you coming back. The basic premise.
My mother in law would scream at me all the time. You never knew what to expect. In public she was so sweet! No wonder her son is the way he is. NOT making excuses for him.
I have done this from the other side, but out of complete frustration listening to lies and and projection from them. It always leaves me almost speechless but then I realize how angry this makes me they think this is okay!? And that's when I'm 2 seconds away from spontaneous combustion, and sorry for spitting my lungs all the way down the block but it really is PURE UTTER FUCKSTRATION. Then Suddenly I'm the abuser abusing them!!! What?!? What!?! 🤷♀️🧘♂️ what just happen??
I could relate to every experience except for one. But I’m sure if given more time to reflect, I could find that one missing ingredient. Love your content and take on this awful disease/disorder/whatever you want to call it... FYI. For anyone looking to cage where they are at. I’m a 44 yr old male, and I’ve been without my malignant narc for 1 yr. o was w her for 2 1/2. And it was the hugest mind job ever... but you couldn’t have told me that when I was w her. I had to wake up and except who she was, and I’m still getting over her daily, and trying to come to terms and except her for who she is. Please be careful w these types of individuals! And what ever you do, take this one but of advice. When you decide to go NC, you never ever listen to it entertain there “feedback”... if they know you are moving on, they have a insidious way of making sure you get stuck, again!..
Triangulation, pretend ignorance, criticism disguised as joking, blameshifting,the whole list! Praise God I am starting to wskie up from this nightmare🙏 Thank you so much for your videos
My narc father loves these mind games you're describing Jill he's loves being ignorant and hateful he's full of malicious intent. He knows I know what he is he know what he is he gets off on bullying & stealing & triangulation!
To point number 4,I would like to add that they when confronted with a bad behaviour, they will twist it around to make what they did into an act of virtue and selflessness. Like they did it for you and you should be grateful. This has happened to me multiple times with a narcissist I knew
Where has this channel been throughout my healing process!? Think I’m going to have to check out the website for one on one. Thank you for being a blessing to us. 🙏💜
My narcissist.. cracks me up how everyone says “my Narc” LoL As far as triangulation mine had me all confused lol we would go out to a restaurant and looking back it seemed Everytime she would leave to go the restroom she would leave her cell on the table in a spot that when it made a noise or lite up you couldn’t help but glance over at it etc.. Anyways she had her cell so a picture of the person calling or messaging popped up and her ex’s picture would appear showing she received a message from him.. not sure how she knew the time to get up and leave the table but I’m definitely sure now that it was done on purpose. At the time though it would confuse and throw me off thinking that .. “ if someone was cheating they certainly wouldn’t of left their cell out in open like that etc... it took me awhile to understand her mind better and the better you understand the more sure you are that there’s no chance of being happy with this person
I had no idea how well I had cut ties with my soon to be ex-husband and his family,until my soon to be ex-brother in law came into the store I work at,and I didnt even recognize him,He said Hi Andrea,and I was like "who are you?".😁
Wow in this 20-year relationship I have experienced every single one of these things. Over and over again I think it's me. I want out so bad. My self-esteem and my self-worth have been so depleted. I know I need to go and I don't know how to get out?
Me - asks a question about a change in habit. Narc - gets angry and irritated by question. Me - goes quiet and into gray rock mode to avoid trying to reason with an unreasonable person. Narc - after a while asks - why are you so angry at me? Me- thinks, you were actually the one who got angry at me...but just stays silent because I now know from experience that if I answer I will be drawn into a crazy making discussion/argument that will cause the narc to get louder and louder and won't resolve anything and will mess with my inner peace and will probably be enjoyed by the narc. “George Bernard Shaw once said, Never wrestle with a pig. You just get dirty and the pig enjoys it,'” I used to think that almost everything could be solved through communication, now I know that doesn't apply to everyone.
Thanks Jill, good video. Narcissists essentially have not found the love that they need within themselves. So they manipulate external circumstances and people to get what they crave. So it's not really their fault ! They are simply doing what they feel they need to do, to get the love they need. We all need. This understanding makes it much easier to forgive them. If we have found the love that we need within ourselves and have no need for external searching and validation, then of course we are the lucky ones and can easily show them compassion. By withdrawing from narcissists we are giving them the opportunity to make another choice. Eventually they will run out of people they can manipulate, so they will be forced to look within. Thanks again, lots of love. x
This is some Mind games i've learned from experiance : One thing about Narcisist is that they aren't scenere nothing they do is scenre when they give out gifts it always has something attached or when were not acting the way they want or when they have a breakdown they take back everything another thing they would do is start drama for no reasons at all " for example on valantines day the day before the narc accused me of being jealous of there relationship and accuse me of having an attitude when I didn't even have one in the first place to begin with I wasn't expecting to spend the rest of valantines crying , but the thing about it is that narcisst enjoy shit like that a chaotic enviorment , they enjoy screaming , they enjoy yelling , they enjoy the confusion , they enjoy the emotional response that is given and the thing about it is that they are fully aware of what there doing its disturbing . narcisitic amenisia its pretty much where when you step to the narcisist with there problematic behavior they act as if that never happened , or " you got the story wrong " type shit or they act as if that never happened ever its just one way of or there ways of gaslighting
Omg! You mentioned that they take credit for things you do etc.. I have the Ultimate example of that. Mine broke up with me on Christmas Day 2018, I was at a rough patch in my life coming off the death of my older brother and my father early that year. And for all she knew I was so upset I may of jumped off a skyscraper or something after she broke up, but instead I think I hit rock bottom and admitted myself into a 4 week rehab(I’m not saying I’m an angel but she had no clue I had a substance abuse problem, I hide it really well. Also at this point in my life I think sometimes what we otherwise would think of as terrible times in our lives these people were put in our lives for a reason. She may of made me so miserable that it really was her that was responsible for my hitting rock bottom and admiting myself into rehab. otherwise I could still be waking up to that miserable world. It helps me not think as badly of them I believe. Long story short when I came out i bounced off rock bottom and turned that part of my life around and shortly after things were going great again for me until this day. Anyways the past 2 years to hear her tell it she broke up with me on xmas day to help me Lol to give me time & help me get my life together and she’s the reason my life has turned around 😂 ie- I owe her When she never even knew I had a problem
Targets are those who are scrupulous, accountable to their own actions, and caring of others. People with less of these qualities are drawn to those with more of it bcuz they can be made the narc’s nanny or supplier with just a bit of manipulation and cajolery. So the thing for targets to remember is that you’re not the one. And you’ll be fine.
Don't Belong Here, From Another Planet But it don’t have to be that way. Higher knowledge is key. Learning something about universal laws and how it affects human behavior will produce great changes in the world.
My husband had an affair with one of these creatures. He eventually moved in with her within 5 weeks of knowing it (her) We were married for 23 years then along came narco. He came back after 3 weeks being in her home. He said the love bombing was like nothing he had ever heard. It always talked bad about me and my marriage. He agreed with everything it had to say. So sad.
I have recently discovered all these things you talk about, I stumbled across this information because I got desperate for answers for the Crappy feelings you describe in your channel. I felt lost but now my eyes are wide opened and we are going to get a divorce. I've been a victim for 37 years
Pretend ignorance is probably one of the most evil and exasperating of them all.. they are all bad but that in one particular. I couldn't even begin to tell you how many times I have encountered that one.. when reality and your intuition is completely in check with one another and to have that denied and used against you. It always made me wish I wasn't right and totally wrong but you cannot deny the truth.. at least I am unable to. It is impossible for me to not call out the truth and that's created a lot of really bad situations througout life. I have a tendency to get mean (which I don't like) when I am denied truth or have to hold it in. That is why I believe there was a crew of stalkers in the midst getting ahead of me and they knew to exploit my temper. But I only get mad when I am denied reality and the truth before my eyes. They did some of the sneakiest most psychologically mind breaking tactics you could ever imagine. I simply cannot believe people or even groups of people can act and behave in the ways that I witnessed out there in these last few years. Sorry for all the edits, I had add more as I watched.. surprisingly my keyboard did not have a mind of its own today, wasn't manipulated.
What terrifies me...is that I would NEVER have thought my N would have had the “knowledge” ( that’s being nice) or “smarts” to design or plot & use these tactics!!! Is it a “second nature”? Or a learned behavior or just a “personality” ?? I so plainly & vividly see ALL these tactics that were used ( & successfully) to control & manipulate ne...& I can remember trying to make sense of the bizarre, erratic, confusing things! His actions, his rationals, his accusations... his flip flop behaviors...on & on... I was a “work in progress” of crazy making by a skilled Narc. ...it’s gut wrenching to look back on!
My sister was/is a narcissist. So, I was able to catch on to the "games" my new girlfriend was playing very quickly. I ended the relationship in record time. No harm done😊
I can find a narcissist they don't even have to say a word I know the games they play it took me a few weeks to become a master of their tricks and I twist and turn it right back around them
My mother never love-bombed either. But she mirrored in that she played the role out of being progressive, which is what I am. Of course she was not progressive or a women's libber at all. She was a nasty witch, and she stole everything that I was and tried to pretend she was doing it better than me.
At first I thought mine didn't either. But then, when I think about all the foster kids that came through our house and got fawned over in front of the social workers.... and were treated like absolute lepers the minute they were alone... to me it was just part of the two-facedness. I will never forget the looks they got if they helped themselves to more potatoes.
Incredible!!!! Is this autonomic? Are they hard wired for this? Are they conscious of their behavior? Meaning did they learn this or is it just a part of their instinctive behavior? SPOT ON thank you dear soul!
Thank you Jill, my ex husband is a malignant narcissist & sociopath who I left in 2000. My adult son, aged 30, is trauma bonded to him and admits his dad is abusive, but believes he can manage him and so isn't in danger. My ex has now convinced my son to move back to live in a flat on the same property as his house and my son will not listen to my attempts at helping him to understand the danger. My son acts defwnsively towards me even though we used to be very close. Why is my son so defensive towards me - the only one that truly loves him. What can I do to help expose his dads abuse. My ex almost destroyed me the wnd time I went back to him. I fear he will do that to my son too.
So their putdowns and insults are really how they look at us? If a narcissist boyfriend were to say that someone was drunk to think I was beautiful then he really thinks I am ugly?
Hi Gill keep up the good work. you are helping a lot of people and saving many lives. the NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) mind control one was very interesting. but also very disturbing. thanks to you i'm becoming more self ware of these mind minupulation techniques that these sorts of people use. you're videos are so helpful. Greetings from the UK. God Bless
Excluding helpless victims, perhaps the goal all along of the "spirit" behind the Narcissist is to get one to think that we are not at fault in any way when the truth is that some of us rebelled, refused Wisdom and as a result we suffered great harm and calamity. It is all there in the very first Chapter of Proverbs read it for yourself. There are hard lessons to learn in life but God is faithful and compassionate to those who call out to Him (even when we act foolishly).
So basically anything and everything they say and do is manipulative !!! I've watched enough of these kind of videos and I wish just one time one person would make it short and just say ...RUN ! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE ! THESE PEOPLE ARE EVIL AND EVERYTHING THEY DO IS EVIL. ..END OF STORY!
Wow. Just wow. You are the best I have EVER seen about this topic. I don't want to know why... But girl, I can tell you stories... A white paper you would write... Famous you would be...(Yoda speak...) You literally answered a prayer.
1. Love Bombing
2. Mirroring
3.Triangulation
4.Negative or Condescending
5.Pretend ignorance
6.Blame Shifting
7.Neuro Linguistic Programming
8.Projection
9. Silent Treatment
10.Gaslighting
The 24 dislikes are covert narcissists who realize their games are being exposed
The hardest part for me was the realization that they were just mirroring me all along. There was was no mutual interest. They made themselves into my perfect love interest only to tell me after the discard that they were never really that person.
Sequence of evolving:
1. Attraction to this person.
2. Being asked to be there.
3. Doing things for them only.
4. Being berated for nothing. while....your helping them.
5. You give benifit of doubt after benifit of doubt.
6. Comments are getting abusive.
7. They had a loss, give them a break. ( btw - so have you but don't treat anyone like shit )
8. Your still doing serious supply.
9. Your in cog diss and a brain fog.
10. You do your homework.
11. Wth. Narcissism? Tic all boxes.
12. You've realized what you have allowed is self abuse.
13. You self reflect and discern absolute certainty.
14. No contact is not an option.
15. You are recovering.
16. You chance a reunification.
17. Your pounded quicker and harder.
18. Reality- This is textbook narc 101.
19. Your denial is vaporized.
20. You begin your journey with the affects.
21. Months go by with clarity leading the way.
22. Your starting to feel alive again.
23. Your never alone because you like who your with.
24. That shit will never, ever happen again.
25. You don't "need" anyone.
Yep. That's exactly the sequence I went through, with more unnecessary/foolish going back to the narc after some successful hoovering she did.
Perfect!
Well done!!! Truth.
and then he comes back and tricks me again.
Mind blowing accuracy, well done. My favorite part of my recovery was the "vaporized... lol" denial and subsequent full-throttle lean into fact gathering, asset protecting, child protecting, money saving and hiring a great divorce attorney. Once your upper brain identifies this oxygen consumer as a narcissist, it takes the wheel from your empathetic heart and goes into survival mode. Gather your facts. Save everything. Keep a journal. Record conversations if you can. Reveal what their sadistic version of reality so desperately desires to keep hidden... the truth. Get out. Stay out. Never look back. Become enlightened once again.
Hello beautiful empaths. Keep your hearts in a safe place and make friends with other empaths. (
Vesna Volf Ⓥ beautifully said. Your right. Experience should teach us all that.ℹ️💯🤔✅❤️🧐✝️🙏🏿📖🗡👊🏿👌🏿👍🏿☯️😎
@Rose Jenny pool pool pm
Amen sister 😊❤️💪
As soon as we started dating he started saying I love you and was annoyed I would not say it back. He immediately started going to my family fundamentalist church from a non religious background. I was only 17 and was so flattered. After 40 years I find out I am not the problem
Pre meditated and calculated. 100% true.
My mother and sister would call it "Live for the Moment", in which they don't have to worry about consequences of effects on others.
@@CynthiaSchoenbauer or you only have one life or I'm a free spirit
absolutely
Calcuted
My brother was always innocently looking for information and just wanted to talk. After a few times of falling into his trap, I realized “I’m just curious” was a dead giveaway! Yes, narcs plan everything ahead.
Well, I was wondering if my family member was a narcissist. This pretty much sealed it as true. This is all hitting home.
Same with me. I have been hit with number 1, 5, 6, and 10.
My family is so messed up now because of all the games my narc-mother played while she was alive. Pancreatic cancer finally got her but I don't think the family bonds will ever recover. There is so much animosity and blaming among those that are left. The hatred and competition is cut-throat.
In some cases, I know most won't agree, cutting ties with toxic relatives is the best and only solution
@@dontbelongherefromanother then after that where to ?
100% fits in my situation...
Ditto.
Just as she intended for it to be.
Every time that she started a fight or if I confronted her, she would demand that i apologize because i was the one that was wrong.
That's a very successful strategy. I also copped that for years. It has you doubting, doesn't it..
Dump the bitch before she dumps you.
That's Reactive Abuse And Gaslighting
I experienced ALL of these 10 mind games with the ex psychopathic narc! I am currently having therapy for PTSD. Unless someone has experienced it they really can't understand the level of damage they cause.Your videos are so validating! Thank you soo much!!Lots of love..❤❤
I'm in therapy for the same.. My narc called 911 when I went no contact. It never stops. Now she is sending expensive gifts and acting like they have done nothing. Stay strong.
@@sinjinmonsoon9055
Your right they stop at nothing.He would always come back and act like his done nothing wrong.I have had to change all my contact details and relocate to a different city,to get away from him! They really are dangerous and crazy as hell!
My daughter's have said I have PTSD due to the abuse I've suffered 😬
I believe it. They are dangerous
Most people in narc relations lack an understanding about it, which keeps them in these toxic relationships. If you don't know, you can't do better. You'll be amazed at how many people are unaware of psychological effects at the hands of others. They chalk their behavior up as a coincidence, or blame themselves
Throw it back at them into their lap. You’ll quickly be deemed lousy supply. They’ll take off fast. Stay on that course. Block on all avenues. Including dumping common friends. Do a spring cleaning. Purge ALL common connections.
Once I cracked the code it was amazing to see how the dominos fall,...
Pretend ignorance! Oh my God, that's a galler. How many people have said something like 'everybody knows this' or 'no one would ever think that' only to have the narc. spin around and suddenly become extremely literal and gaslight you on the use these expressions. Many times with my covert narcissist ex-husband I would end up so frustrated, nearly out of my mind, and screaming "Am I speaking Chinese????"
And when you screamed that did he have that devilish smirk on his face.
They get off on making you irritate behind the "playing dumb" routine.
Shifting blame nails it! It happens way to often.
Just got outof a relationship with a woman like this, They wreak havoc on your life like nothing else on this earth
This is what I have been going through with my narcissist wife. After being married for 8 years now, I am in the final discard stage of being divorced. It hurts to think that your whole relationship was a huge lie. I helped raise her daughter who is autistic and we have a son together. To have been manipulated all this time and know that she never ever had any type of true love for you hurts to your soul. But GOD is good because HE has been pulling her mask off and keeping me and the children at the same time. Keep exposing these wicked people. You are a blessing to us all. GOD will deliver us and deal with the narcissists in our lives.
Almost sounds like an MK Ultra Handler! Are these people even aware of the fact that they're not even human? This is incredible thank you
They find radical ideologies attractive
When you catch them red handed they start the word salad. I used a notebook and took notes during the conversations. Totally freaks them out.
Bingo. Jill, I have been dealing with all these mindgames. So recognizable. My covert narcissist ex partner played her part perfectly and I fell for it. I am happy that I ended the relationship 18 months ago. It was a relationship of only eight months but I had the feeling that it lasted five years. It was just one huge fake show. In the end I saw her façade and flaws. It was to good to be true. I learned a lot about myself afterwards. Don't take it personal. It is not personal what the narcissist is doing to you.
Just wait until a narcissist tries to convince you that you're a narcissist. Makes you feel nuts. Its hard to differentiate whether you're capable of good judgment anymore.
They are experts at gaslighting
For real :/
She made me doubt about myself, and ashamed of having my own feelings.
Great useful info to help us unmask the narcissist in our family that is so toxic and abusive!
Useful indeed! I am becoming less and less confused now.
So true. My soon to be ex is a BPD and narcissist. She always throws something else in a discussion to cloud the issue. Plus has a convenient loss of memory when it comes to agreements we made. Thanks for all that you do for us sufferes of their abuse.
My ex bf ruined my image at school and my best friend seduced him that's the only thing I thanked him for I knew her nature after that.
Crazy?! The diagnoser (who's never went to school for any kind of psychology training or studies) they read stuff online so that means they can diagnose me, but they won't be that dumb to really do that and diagnose me, but God damn it don't you dare tell them they're wrong! ✌😶🌺 I really need to stop abusing them!
Everything you say describes my relationship! 5 days. I’m so lost . I can’t believe the time I invested , the time I wasted , I can’t believe the strong me has now became so weak and believed everything this man said! To find out he has been married our entire ten years is so devastating . He even told me he was never going to tell me he was married and living with his wife.I can’t believe my life. Thank you for these videos because I’m trying to understand my life now ! I’m trying to pick up the pieces!
❤
The reason we are not taught this information in school is because our government plays by this handbook!
Anyone in particular come to mind?
@@1bsbsbsbs hmmm...yeah. Everyone.
@@1bsbsbsbs pretty much all polititians, thats why i favor the smallest government possible
I would disagree. Parents should have taught their children this. I don't think the government is smart enough to do this. Just look at how many get caught cheating / stealing / etc. Not saying they don't take advantage of it. And why do we blame schools for a lot of things.
For my son I taught him to learn and to question things he hears. There is a lot of BS out there. Learn to find the truth even if it is uncomfortable.
exactly
About four months ago my narc began to now financially abuse me - withholding money - hoarding it. This too is abuse and I rarely hear it spoken on any channels but it’s meant to make you feel totally helpless to demean you! It’s a horrible feeling having to beg for money for bills. Yes we are divorcing. Thank God Alighty that He made a way for me to get out!!!
Thank you Jill for continuing to enlighten the world of this damaging and devastating disorder called NPD. xoxo
There's nothing worse then having to beg for money to take care of basic needs. Having to ask for money from someone that's degrading you and making you feel worthless is incredibly abusive and hits you at your core. Hope your getting out asap🌟
Jackie James - Thank you Jackie for completing understand exactly what I am experiencing. It’s such a horrible feeling deep from within. And although we are in the middle of a divorce I won’t be able to leave then either. You see he was in a car accident and stands to walk away with a lot of money and I mean a lot. Of course I’m getting screwed in that too yet I will get $500 a week, 10% of what he nets and have my car paid off. Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful I am getting anything for he could have left me penniless but my point is, he claims he cannot afford to live alone and pay me my $500 when the divorce is finalized therefore we have to stay together way after the divorce until this settlement comes in. If I leave after the divorce with only the $500, he will make sure I never know about that settlement and he will also make sure I don’t get my 10% or car paid off so I am literally stuck with him for a good 6-8 more months, if not longer. He never financially abused me before and we were married for 30 years so I don’t know what brought this on with him but he’s most definitely hoarding money for he’s now away for 2 full weeks at a motel. He claims he’s there bc he doesn’t want to get me sick. Please, I have had enough of his lies to last me a lifetime! The point is he does have the money and he is now using money as a form of manipulation, control and fear. He really does suck as a person and I for one cannot wait for this all to be over. I can promise him one thing, he will never ever hear from me ever again for I will go no contact as soon as I’m in my own place. Thank you for understanding!! Hugs 🤗
Same here, only I have nothing, no money no job. Don't know how to get away.
Jane Yost - Jane, if there’s any way to sneak $5 or $10 bucks here and there from him, do so!! That’s what I did. When I would go food shopping, it would ask if I wanted cash back. I always hit yes, sometimes taking $20, sometimes $40 and sometimes $60. Walmart allows up to $100 but that would look too obvious especially if your narc checks the bank account like mine does. That’s why I stuck to only taking $20 at a time for the most part. Before I knew it, over the course of a few months (about 4 months) I had $3000 saved. I couldn’t believe it. I also would ask him for money to pay the bills and would always make the price higher so if my water bill was $60, I would tell him I need $100 and pocket that money. Also, if you’re in any position I highly recommend getting a job, even a small part time job delivering pizzas which pay you an hourly rate as well as tips. Whatever you do, try your best not to fight with him bc they get off on that. They want us to fight with them. Shut down the conversation by walking away. Study and research everything you can about narcissism so you know what you are up against. Trust me, I am the most passive person who despises confrontation so on that fateful day when he deliberately provoked me waking me 3 times I got mad but he got even madder. Go figure, right? He was cursing and yelling on the top of his lungs trying to scare me, trying to intimidate me but I sat and listened to him fight all by himself. I never said a word until he was done and that’s when I finally stood up for myself and said: you will never ever treat or talk to me that way ever again! A few days later I got the discard and it was so cold and callous as if 30 years meant absolutely nothing to him and the sad part of it all, it didn’t mean anything to him. I was just here to use and abuse. Plus I already knew he had hooked up with a new supply but I didn’t care - my love for him had stopped years ago. My point is to try your best to save any little bit of money. Stash it away until you do have enough for a bank account. Do you have young children or any children? Is it possible for you to get a small part time job? I’m here if you need to talk so please don’t hesitate if you need someone to talk with. I will be praying for you. PS- I believe the reason why a majority of women stay is bc lack of funds. I know I sure wouldn’t have stayed 30 years if I was able to support myself. I’m still not really able to and he’s already made it clear that he refuses to pay me what’s in our divorce ($500 a week). Well he will soon be in contempt of court and I will take him to court if I have to. Also depending on the state and how long you’ve been married, you may be entitled to alimony. Please don’t loose hope bc if I am able to get through this, I know anyone can. And again, if you just need someone to listen to you, I am here for you. Blessings to you, sending my love and hugs through the miles. ♥️
True, they not only take away financial resources, but restrict and cause strains on friendships and family support
as i listen to this i am getting flashbacks of my relationship with my ex, and its all spot on correct
I love your channel. You get it out there, simple to understand, and all straight out truth facts!!
Omg :-( she really did all the things to me what you mentioned in your video :-( these narcs are dangerous for themselves and their victims.
Run 🏃♀️
The minute I feel confusion, lack of clarity I walk...
Especially if I ask for clarity a few times and never get it...
@Snow Flakes The ending... hahahaha...
I think that people may need to understand, too, that the reason why narcissists are so persistent, is because it’s not simply that you’re their little project to play with and because narcissism, particularly the NPD form of it (meeting 5 of the 9 criteria), is because doing what they do is a belief system.
Belief systems are, I gather, much like religion. If you’ve ever tried swaying someone from their religious beliefs, although not that you should, you’ll likely be quite unsuccessful.
NPD is a defense mechanism. They HAVE to believe in what they’re doing and, in turn, they HAVE to believe in the roles that they, you and and others play in their lives. If that means you’re life is destroyed, as far as they’re concerned, there’s no problem with that and you’ve likely earned it. Whatever gets them to their goal.
My narc mother triangulates big time.
They use flying monkeys too to get back at you. It's sad that flying monkeys go along with it. Narcs have tremendous control on others. Do they have special powers?
I have 4 siblings. There is huge scope for triangulation. Now that enabler dad is dead she has full rein to pull strings constantly. "I don't remember that" "I did no such thing" and on and on.... then has the nerve to complain that her kids are not speaking to each other- mom you brought this on yourself, then she can't help but smirk.
@@dontbelongherefromanother no. There are just too many pathological people who pathologicallyy attach to each other and produce pathological masses. Think of the nazis.
I experienced almost all 10 of those behaviors. What I think will serve me will looking forward is to look for those first few with wide eyed clarity... over the top compliments, suddenly being in line with everything important to me and taking digs at old relationships and what may seem like cute digs about me and my life under the heading of "just kidding". The rest are important of course, but those will show up earlier, at least in my experience.
It just amazes me how much time they invest in sabatoging people lives and in the end they sabotage theirs the most. Thats a low I pray that all that recognize they abuse be thankful you made it out.
This is true. My mother has spent so much time concentrating on making others miserable that she has no friends left, the neighbours won't speak to her, she has made no plans for her old age- just assumes others will take care of it. It sounds horrible but she really deserves to be in one of the ghastlier homes. This woman was very abusive to animals as well as people.
@@Chahlie mine as well. They are not healthy so building healthy relationships are out of their scope.
I couldn’t count the number of times that I was ready to take my life, over these things, that I just couldn’t wrap my head around, that my wife had been doing to me for the last 6 years 😭😭😭
I did when I was 16. My mother is a covert Narc. My father is a violent alcoholic and a psychopath.
@@petekdemircioglu
Glad you are still with us 🙏. No matter how bad things seem at the time, there are always better times and things to look forward to ❤️
Weew
Narcs #1 reason for living is supply, then control, they will pull supply in a way that you may not notice and that will keep you coming back. The basic premise.
My narc mother does emotional abuse attacks and screams and yells at the top of her lungs never joking.
X
My mother in law would scream at me all the time. You never knew what to expect. In public she was so sweet! No wonder her son is the way he is. NOT making excuses for him.
@@janeyost2439 thx
I have done this from the other side, but out of complete frustration listening to lies and and projection from them. It always leaves me almost speechless but then I realize how angry this makes me they think this is okay!? And that's when I'm 2 seconds away from spontaneous combustion, and sorry for spitting my lungs all the way down the block but it really is PURE UTTER FUCKSTRATION. Then Suddenly I'm the abuser abusing them!!! What?!? What!?! 🤷♀️🧘♂️ what just happen??
I love these videos. You should be in every high school teaching young ppl all of this. It is so important.
Wow useful information lost 22 years and my children to a narcissist, now if believe love is blind.
Wow I can relate to this. N/C is the best way, stay away from soulless people
I could relate to every experience except for one. But I’m sure if given more time to reflect, I could find that one missing ingredient. Love your content and take on this awful disease/disorder/whatever you want to call it...
FYI. For anyone looking to cage where they are at. I’m a 44 yr old male, and I’ve been without my malignant narc for 1 yr. o was w her for 2 1/2. And it was the hugest mind job ever... but you couldn’t have told me that when I was w her. I had to wake up and except who she was, and I’m still getting over her daily, and trying to come to terms and except her for who she is. Please be careful w these types of individuals! And what ever you do, take this one but of advice. When you decide to go NC, you never ever listen to it entertain there “feedback”... if they know you are moving on, they have a insidious way of making sure you get stuck, again!..
Triangulation, pretend ignorance, criticism disguised as joking, blameshifting,the whole list! Praise God I am starting to wskie up from this nightmare🙏 Thank you so much for your videos
Mine was a master of acquired helplessness.. always pleaded she didn't know. I got played every time.
I wish I had known these things when I was growing up. Can you please make a video about the types of gaslighting?
fake news is one method of gaslighting
@@Expose_bankers_and_auctioneers ok... CNN this channel is as about personal relationship
Wow I've experienced 90 percent of this crazy behavior
Thank you for all the great video you do for all of us!! Love from Sweden ❤❤❤
My narc father loves these mind games you're describing Jill he's loves being ignorant and hateful he's full of malicious intent. He knows I know what he is he know what he is he gets off on bullying & stealing & triangulation!
To point number 4,I would like to add that they when confronted with a bad behaviour, they will twist it around to make what they did into an act of virtue and selflessness. Like they did it for you and you should be grateful. This has happened to me multiple times with a narcissist I knew
Oh, gaslighting
stalk u n call u the stalker/sad.
Projection..
@@MegaDECCANCHARGER agree.
Exactly. It's disgusting.
Where has this channel been throughout my healing process!? Think I’m going to have to check out the website for one on one. Thank you for being a blessing to us. 🙏💜
My narcissist.. cracks me up how everyone says “my Narc” LoL
As far as triangulation mine had me all confused lol we would go out to a restaurant and looking back it seemed Everytime she would leave to go the restroom she would leave her cell on the table in a spot that when it made a noise or lite up you couldn’t help but glance over at it etc.. Anyways she had her cell so a picture of the person calling or messaging popped up and her ex’s picture would appear showing she received a message from him.. not sure how she knew the time to get up and leave the table but I’m definitely sure now that it was done on purpose. At the time though it would confuse and throw me off thinking that .. “ if someone was cheating they certainly wouldn’t of left their cell out in open like that etc... it took me awhile to understand her mind better and the better you understand the more sure you are that there’s no chance of being happy with this person
Thanks for sharing. Same thing happened to me. I thought I was getting paranoid.
Describes her 96%....I caught on with help, and got myself away from her. OMG she was angry
Love your topics. Thanks for explaining things so well. It's a process isn't it. Thanks for the support in recovery.
I had no idea how well I had cut ties with my soon to be ex-husband and his family,until my soon to be ex-brother in law came into the store I work at,and I didnt even recognize him,He said Hi Andrea,and I was like "who are you?".😁
Wow
Wow in this 20-year relationship I have experienced every single one of these things. Over and over again I think it's me. I want out so bad. My self-esteem and my self-worth have been so depleted. I know I need to go and I don't know how to get out?
Trust that you can live without them, it might feel weird at first maybe hurt aswell.
you don't need them, they need you.
@@Stormcloakvictory So very true. Thank you.
Goodness!! i just remarried my narc....what the hell!! I didn’t realize what he was doing. He only has a few of these traits, but holy sh!t.
Me - asks a question about a change in habit.
Narc - gets angry and irritated by question.
Me - goes quiet and into gray rock mode to avoid trying to reason with an unreasonable person.
Narc - after a while asks - why are you so angry at me?
Me- thinks, you were actually the one who got angry at me...but just stays silent because I now know from experience that if I answer I will be drawn into a crazy making discussion/argument that will cause the narc to get louder and louder and won't resolve anything and will mess with my inner peace and will probably be enjoyed by the narc. “George Bernard Shaw once said, Never wrestle with a pig. You just get dirty and the pig enjoys it,'”
I used to think that almost everything could be solved through communication, now I know that doesn't apply to everyone.
Excellent run down of the things that they do, the games they LOVE to play. Nailed it!!!! As usual! Lots of Love from Cali!♥️♥️♥️🙃
Thanks Jill, good video. Narcissists essentially have not found the love that they need within themselves. So they manipulate external circumstances and people to get what they crave. So it's not really their fault ! They are simply doing what they feel they need to do, to get the love they need. We all need. This understanding makes it much easier to forgive them. If we have found the love that we need within ourselves and have no need for external searching and validation, then of course we are the lucky ones and can easily show them compassion. By withdrawing from narcissists we are giving them the opportunity to make another choice. Eventually they will run out of people they can manipulate, so they will be forced to look within. Thanks again, lots of love. x
Or you just consider them manovelant and evil ......
@@flowersofthefield340 Personally I try not to judge anyone because it hurts ME if I do that.
This is some Mind games i've learned from experiance :
One thing about Narcisist is that they aren't scenere nothing they do is scenre when they give out gifts it always has something attached or when were not acting the way they want or when they have a breakdown they take back everything
another thing they would do is start drama for no reasons at all " for example on valantines day the day before the narc accused me of being jealous of there relationship and accuse me of having an attitude when I didn't even have one in the first place to begin with I wasn't expecting to spend the rest of valantines crying , but the thing about it is that narcisst enjoy shit like that a chaotic enviorment , they enjoy screaming , they enjoy yelling , they enjoy the confusion , they enjoy the emotional response that is given and the thing about it is that they are fully aware of what there doing its disturbing .
narcisitic amenisia
its pretty much where when you step to the narcisist with there problematic behavior they act as if that never happened , or " you got the story wrong " type shit or they act as if that never happened ever its just one way of or there ways of gaslighting
Omg! You mentioned that they take credit for things you do etc.. I have the Ultimate example of that. Mine broke up with me on Christmas Day 2018, I was at a rough patch in my life coming off the death of my older brother and my father early that year. And for all she knew I was so upset I may of jumped off a skyscraper or something after she broke up, but instead I think I hit rock bottom and admitted myself into a 4 week rehab(I’m not saying I’m an angel but she had no clue I had a substance abuse problem, I hide it really well. Also at this point in my life I think sometimes what we otherwise would think of as terrible times in our lives these people were put in our lives for a reason. She may of made me so miserable that it really was her that was responsible for my hitting rock bottom and admiting myself into rehab. otherwise I could still be waking up to that miserable world. It helps me not think as badly of them I believe.
Long story short when I came out i bounced off rock bottom and turned that part of my life around and shortly after things were going great again for me until this day. Anyways the past 2 years to hear her tell it she broke up with me on xmas day to help me Lol to give me time & help me get my life together and she’s the reason my life has turned around 😂 ie- I owe her
When she never even knew I had a problem
FUTURE FAKING is what got me to let down my guard
This hit me hard
Targets are those who are scrupulous, accountable to their own actions, and caring of others. People with less of these qualities are drawn to those with more of it bcuz they can be made the narc’s nanny or supplier with just a bit of manipulation and cajolery. So the thing for targets to remember is that you’re not the one. And you’ll be fine.
Targets are very vulnerable and can be easily swayed by them. I think empathy plays a role that makes them susceptible
Don't Belong Here, From Another Planet But it don’t have to be that way. Higher knowledge is key. Learning something about universal laws and how it affects human behavior will produce great changes in the world.
@@bc1248 great points
My husband had an affair with one of these creatures. He eventually moved in with her within 5 weeks of knowing it (her)
We were married for 23 years then along came narco. He came back after 3 weeks being in her home. He said the love bombing was like nothing he had ever heard. It always talked bad about me and my marriage. He agreed with everything it had to say. So sad.
Divorce him.
I have recently discovered all these things you talk about, I stumbled across this information because I got desperate for answers for the Crappy feelings you describe in your channel. I felt lost but now my eyes are wide opened and we are going to get a divorce. I've been a victim for 37 years
Pretend ignorance is probably one of the most evil and exasperating of them all.. they are all bad but that in one particular.
I couldn't even begin to tell you how many times I have encountered that one.. when reality and your intuition is completely in check with one another and to have that denied and used against you. It always made me wish I wasn't right and totally wrong but you cannot deny the truth.. at least I am unable to.
It is impossible for me to not call out the truth and that's created a lot of really bad situations througout life. I have a tendency to get mean (which I don't like) when I am denied truth or have to hold it in.
That is why I believe there was a crew of stalkers in the midst getting ahead of me and they knew to exploit my temper. But I only get mad when I am denied reality and the truth before my eyes. They did some of the sneakiest most psychologically mind breaking tactics you could ever imagine. I simply cannot believe people or even groups of people can act and behave in the ways that I witnessed out there in these last few years.
Sorry for all the edits, I had add more as I watched.. surprisingly my keyboard did not have a mind of its own today, wasn't manipulated.
I love you, Enlightened Target
Mind games & Narcissist go hand in hand ! Enlightened Target channel speaks alot of truth about these toxic narcs .
What terrifies me...is that I would NEVER have thought my N would have had the “knowledge” ( that’s being nice) or “smarts” to design or plot & use these tactics!!! Is it a “second nature”? Or a learned behavior or just a “personality” ?? I so plainly & vividly see ALL these tactics that were used ( & successfully) to control & manipulate ne...& I can remember trying to make sense of the bizarre, erratic, confusing things! His actions, his rationals, his accusations... his flip flop behaviors...on & on... I was a “work in progress” of crazy making by a skilled Narc. ...it’s gut wrenching to look back on!
Silent treatment and withholding sex is what I face.
My sister was/is a narcissist. So, I was able to catch on to the "games" my new girlfriend was playing very quickly. I ended the relationship in record time. No harm done😊
Gratitude for sharing knowledge
I can find a narcissist they don't even have to say a word I know the games they play it took me a few weeks to become a master of their tricks and I twist and turn it right back around them
One of the best videos on the subject !!
Yes, your hearts are special and deserve someone good. Not cruel. 🍒
My narc mother never love bombed or mirrored.
NismoFury that’s more in romantic relationship
My mother never love-bombed either. But she mirrored in that she played the role out of being progressive, which is what I am. Of course she was not progressive or a women's libber at all. She was a nasty witch, and she stole everything that I was and tried to pretend she was doing it better than me.
My narc mother’s “love bombing” was just passive acceptance.
At first I thought mine didn't either. But then, when I think about all the foster kids that came through our house and got fawned over in front of the social workers.... and were treated like absolute lepers the minute they were alone... to me it was just part of the two-facedness. I will never forget the looks they got if they helped themselves to more potatoes.
My narc ask me if i knew the difference between Sociopath and Schyphopath so he knew exactly what he was 😐😐😐
Apparently not, if he had to ask.
@@wheelerpat8 He asked if she knew not for her to explain it to him. Manipulation for sure.
P N Ahh, gotcha!
Incredible!!!! Is this autonomic? Are they hard wired for this? Are they conscious of their behavior? Meaning did they learn this or is it just a part of their instinctive behavior? SPOT ON thank you dear soul!
Thank you Jill, my ex husband is a malignant narcissist & sociopath who I left in 2000. My adult son, aged 30, is trauma bonded to him and admits his dad is abusive, but believes he can manage him and so isn't in danger. My ex has now convinced my son to move back to live in a flat on the same property as his house and my son will not listen to my attempts at helping him to understand the danger. My son acts defwnsively towards me even though we used to be very close. Why is my son so defensive towards me - the only one that truly loves him. What can I do to help expose his dads abuse.
My ex almost destroyed me the wnd time I went back to him. I fear he will do that to my son too.
You are good. And so are your followers thankyou I gotta get my nest egg going some how he always knows every dime I have
They also use sophism and if you confront them with it,
they say it was not what they meant while it was exactly what they meant.
So their putdowns and insults are really how they look at us? If a narcissist boyfriend were to say that someone was drunk to think I was beautiful then he really thinks I am ugly?
Thank God I discovered your channel!!
I feel like you are telling my story ,exactly what happened to me I didn't know what was going and why someone would act like that ...
All applicable, looking to expand on NLP. Thank you for the clarity. 🤓😳🤠
Hi Gill keep up the good work. you are helping a lot of people and saving many lives. the NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) mind control one was very interesting. but also very disturbing. thanks to you i'm becoming more self ware of these mind minupulation techniques that these sorts of people use. you're videos are so helpful. Greetings from the UK. God Bless
What if a narcissist tells you that you are the keeper of the Grail?
Thank you for explaining so clearly
Totally correct
Excluding helpless victims, perhaps the goal all along of the "spirit" behind the Narcissist is to get one to think that we are not at fault in any way when the truth is that some of us rebelled, refused Wisdom and as a result we suffered great harm and calamity. It is all there in the very first Chapter of Proverbs read it for yourself. There are hard lessons to learn in life but God is faithful and compassionate to those who call out to Him (even when we act foolishly).
Thank you for your reinforcements.
So basically anything and everything they say and do is manipulative !!!
I've watched enough of these kind of videos and I wish just one time one person would make it short and just say ...RUN ! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE ! THESE PEOPLE ARE EVIL AND EVERYTHING THEY DO IS EVIL. ..END OF STORY!
Very smart!
A narcissist steal your soul and you lose yourself
You just described my former wife of 25 years.
What happens if both partners or parent/child, employer/employee are narcissists?
That’d be a roller coaster.
Excellent. Thank you.
Man, this describes my ex wife to the T. It cost me $250k to get rid of her and I was sentenced to alimony for life, but it was worth every penny.
excellent breakdown.. concise and clear
Wow. Just wow. You are the best I have EVER seen about this topic. I don't want to know why... But girl, I can tell you stories... A white paper you would write... Famous you would be...(Yoda speak...) You literally answered a prayer.