My child is not my child (Part 2) | Unpacked with Relebogile Mabotja - Episode 109 | Season 3
Vložit
- čas přidán 24. 03. 2022
- A guest shares his story on how he raised a child that he didn't know wasn't his
Studio Guests: Seleka Ramatlotlo
#UnpackedWithRelebogile
Connect with us on:
Facebook: /
Instagram: / unpackedshow
Twitter: / unpackedshow
TikTok: / unpackedshow
Feel free to suggest the topics that you'd like for us to unpack using our community server in discord: / discord
linktr.ee/Unpackedshow
I am a Kenyan living in North America and I am now subscribed to this channel. This interviewer is very mature and empathetic. Love the show! South Africans are so attractive!
Thank You ❤️🌹.
🌻🌺
Lol are you referring to the man?
@@jaiyaalexandra144 Actually no. I have been watching this show about a month and everyone there is looking good lol! including the host herself. She's beautiful!
She's amazing
I personally feel like partiality fraud should be handled like any other criminal case and they should give the victims their money back
I agree, everyone needs to be held accountable.
As a woman, it's the same issue I have about women who lie about being raped. There needs to be consequences because these are serious matters that affect so many people
She either knew who the father was and "chose" him because of his seemingly stable financial life, or she was aware that there are different possible fathers but not knowing which one of the men is actually the father and since he was the one who decided step up it all fell on him, turns out it's not his child 🤷🏾♀️. She owes him an apology, and I hope whoever she went to introduce the child as their son welcomes and loves the child. Unfortunately that guy will possibly also have issues understanding and accepting that this lady only shows up with a 5 year old and claims that he's the father. So at the end of the day the child is the one who is at a disadvantage here.
I feel for this guy, he is so heartbroken and this may stay with him all his life, it's one of those things that you can only learn to live with. It is a loss. I wish him healing, and may he successfully start his own cute little family with a woman of his dreams.
Such a mature and gentle comment ❤️
I agree with you on the first half
But this guy was cheating on his girlfriend and got someone he barely knows pregnant! This is what he gets. He tried to sugar coat it saying he had someone but was 'having fun'! No my brother, you were cheating and being reckless too! People should really be responsible with their sexual lives to avoid messes like this. A lot of innocent children are affected by the reckless sexual decisions of their parents
I think we should have an episode with women who didn't know the partenity because I am here wondering how... I know of someone who was married and had two children outside her marriage and managed to convince her husband that he was the father. So he was based in the Free State and she'd mess around when she was in Joburg and once she learns she's pregnant she'd go to her husband...
@@elle_l808l okay
@@kwetsephetla3597 thank you ❤
Oh boy, such a kind hearted gent. Didn't deserve any of this. The mom must just give him closure and set him free.
Paternity fraud is a crime and it should be punishable by law , look what this guy is going through😭
40 lashes and 10 years jail. that'll learn any women that tries that game.
i agree with you
Wishing your guest the best. He's a good guy,; he deserves better.
His not , he cheated on his girlfriend and got someone else pregnant 🚮🚮
"good guy" that one I disagree I mean he cheated on his then girlfriend with the girl who lied about the paternity of the child🤷🏽♀️what was done to him was not fair but 'good guy' definitely not.
@@pileshongwe7827 Auw kahleni bo just because he made a mistake once, he must be judged for that his entire life? Do you know that sometimes people do horrible things not because they are horrible people but because they are broken people.
@@tebooho8582 please dont forget that they werent married, it was just dating and dating isnt marriage or commitment
@@alettaphalatsi477 lol they were in a relationship and them not being married was not a card for him to go and sleep with other people
He lost a child. When he talks about the empty car seat and the noodles. Its something that someone has last a child would say. He deserved better 🥀
This story has brought tears to my eyes.... The guy is just such a good guy. He deserves better, and God will give him his own real son.
When he said "noodles trigger me" I just lost it. It's those tiny things that hold the dearest memories.
😭
I cried also 😢
He is really willing to talk and still take care of the child as his own. Eish I feel so sorry for him, can imagine the emotional turmoil he is going through
I honestly think paternity tests must be part of post-partum routine tests to avoid such.There are way too many cases like this.
Absolutely 💯
Absolutely 💯
Hahahahahaha kahleni
ahhhahahaha
I'm immensely inspired that such good-hearted man's still exist. 99% of our father out there are still alive but Don't even know if we have food or not .hope that upcoming generations should see you as an inspiration.🥺
Pray that God shall heal you ,strength you,and brighter up you life .may doors open may the peace of God be with you ❤16 year old writing to you with love and respect
I love when she says "Let's unpack" gets me every time!
I really hope younger people watching this will take all the lessons to grab from this story.
1. Sex is NOT a game guys, it's exclusive intimacy shared between people who are in love
2. Sleeping around isn't an achievement of any sort, you are not cool!
3. Let's be better parents, don't expose your kids to trauma that will change their whole life trajectory especially in the name of pleasing a partner.
4. If you have issues, find healing through counseling and other means
5. You can not play ama dice with an innocent child
6. Let's just do better! Let's be better adults who can end these crazy cycles. Yheeer!
The guy might not have been a great partner to the girl he cheated on but truly he is a good person . In life we make mistakes, he didn’t deserve this and I say he is a good person because through out he remained calm and showed love towards “his son” .
Good hearted man bt becareful the mother of child will end up killing u cz u are disturbing her and hr child she just wanted to use you
Accept it.and move on you are wasting time your. Characters doesnt match an she will never apologise leave her and be healed bythe grace of God an move on
She owes him an APOLOGY and MONEY...she should pay him back through the courts
Such a good man. I pray that this experince dont destroy his trust in women and that he will get a child of his own one day.🙏🏽
I hope he meets a good woman who'll give him his own children.
He had a good womam and cheated on her. Wa layega to be honest
@@Lulu-xh2wr mmmmh a man would rather die as lo g as he cheated and i noticed a lot of woman has that mindset
He has to heal first.No woman woukd feel comfortable staying with a man who is still recalling another person's child as his even after knowing very well hez nit the father.Until he is able to face that fact, moving on may be difficult.
Ds guy looks like a very good guy it's unfortunate dat such happened to him
I had d similar incident in 2019, where I thought my child was mine, d different is dat I had lucky cos her friend who knew the whole truth managed to call me and told me d whole Truth b4 the child was born, mind u I'm talking about a woman dat I had paid a lobola d previous year in 2018.... women, ngiyabesaba mina even today 🤨
As a 23 year old this is eye opening. Glad he had the courage to tell his story. Now we coming up can learn from his mistakes. Ziyakhala mo lefatsheng ahh! All the best to the gentleman moving foward.
you know what i gained from this episode is that 1. it is possible to love a child that is not yours and i found that very humbling. 2. we need to deal with past traumas since nature ends up forcing us to deal with them. love and light to you my brother hope you end up with someone who loves you and honest of their intentions. go and enjoy life remember it begins at 40......
I respect you seleke.. I respect how you allowed yourself to be a human.. Because most of men won't do this.. Speaking out of things that broke you down. I salute you.
Isn't this amazing?! This man understands that fatherhood has less to do with biological connection and more to do with emotional connection and commitment. I also appreciate his suggestion to men to seek counselling to heal past traumas so that it doesn't infect their partners and children. Seleka I salute you and wish you positivity in every part of your life💐
Well, it depends on what you believe. For most African cultures, it is very important ( actually Critical) for the child to be biological and to carry surname of the father. Some would say that this is more important than an emotional connection.
The problem is that if he is not biological, he won’t be accepted by his ancestors and that can cause a lot of hardships/illness /misfortunes etc in the child’s life. Of course you would have to believe in this to know what I am referring to . To a lot of people, this is reality.
@@tranquilsoothingsounds3334 Yes. I'm aware of this cultural perspective and I respect it. I just feel that once a child is brought into the world they should be given the best chance at life. Imagine a world with no adoptive parents.
That mother is a selfish human being. Denying her son an opportunity to have a positive male influence. I wish this guy complete healing and happiness.
Karma will catch up with her.
Her son will grow up and make sense of things..especiallynow that this is documented forever. She will have to deal with the consequences of her actions later on
The boy will grow up like this guy. "Trying everything not to be like his father".
The mother is possibly telling the boy every lie to make not-dad look like the villain.
The mother of that child is incredibly cruel. I wonder what made her that way. I hope the boy won't be damaged. And I hope this kind man finds closure. And I hope his pain one day, goes away.
As much as it's so painful for him and I'm sorry for that, but it's heartwarming to know that there's still good men like him out there.
"good men like him" 😂noo the reason he is in this situation is because he cheated on his then girlfriend
@@tebooho8582 he’s in this situation because a woman lied about the paternity of the baby . He’s a good man , might not have been a good partner then but that doesn’t change that he’s a good man
Good man means good partner, good father and good to everyone else. But this one is only a good father, not good man. He played games, and got played. You cant expect honesty from people when you're not honest yourself.
I feel sorry for him but he deserves it, cheated on his then girlfriend and breaking her heart. Serves him good.
@@carolinemmabatho5119 exactly
I wish my children have such father. You an amazing soul, God will bless you and the woman in your life is already blessed.
This made me cry 😢 he is such a good guy and didn't deserve this...I pray he marries a good wife who won't take advantage of him.
My heart breaks for him... what a genuine, beautiful and a great soul. May God heal and restore you♥️🙏🏾
this guy deserves a woman who will love , respect and appreciate him. God heal this man..We need more men like these
I'm here 👋
Nope. He had a girl that loved him but he cheated and slept with a stranger without a condom.
@@theglen85 🌚
@@boi2melo88 we don't know if the girl loved her. Like he said, it was not that serious.
Bruh, they stopped making your kind a long time ago. You're such a good hearted man. Her loss....
❤❤❤ I love this guy. He has such a beautiful heart. It’s rare to find good man like him
There has to be a law that protects men in such circumstances, women needs to start paying for these lies
🤣🤣🤣🤣
I am truly sorry my brother, you are good person even at Varsity we all admired you.May the Lord heal your heart and bless you more.
I understand he want closure, but also digging to understand 'her side of the story' I feel it will only hurt him more. Sometimes it's better to take the uneasy way. I wish you could forgive and heal and be able to love again.
All that toxicity from the mother is gonna get to the child. She's gonna break him worse than she broke this guy. Cold woman to the core. She's gonna gaslight him until he becomes an angry man with deep issues in his adult life. God bless his heart😭
@@botlemooa8502 I'm glad it's just your opinion. Nothing more, nothing less. Ad hominem makes you the best thing about SA. Night night
My heart breaks for him so badly 💔 wishing you a lot of healing Seleka. God will restore, you are such a kind hearted gent. A good woman will cross your path
Oh Man you are such a wonderful man and decent as well. I pray that you may find peace and healing and also one day be reunited with the boy❤.
Oh what a good hearted man
Wishing him healing❤️🩹
Even through his pain ,he still cares,He is the image of God.
I appreciate this man and his honesty and openness. He did what many men who are suffering are not able to do, to open up publicly. I wish him the very best in his life.
Good men are always being taken for granted. You may not be the biological father but you are his daddy.
Ayi
I hope one day the boy sees this interview.
even the child will struggle to trust girls generally
Right. I think the woman is creating problems for herself. The boy is going to have a lot of questions for her when he grows up.
Poor thing 😢 been holding back those tears since the beginning
Some of us can only dream of men like you to father our children.
The pain in the voice is unbearable 💔. Sorry Mr. You are a true definition of a Good Man. God gives you healing and bless you abundantly. 🙏 . Continue being a kind soul.
You really were strong for the interview, there’s so much sadness in your voice. I thought you’d break down at any moment 😔. I pray for your healing 🙏🏾
I can't stop crying...it's so sad how people take advantage of good hearted people
Cold hearted woman she is. I hope the boy is raised well, by God's grace.
Leave the boy alone, he will grow and find you if at all. Heal and move on. Don't do 'fun' anymore now my dear, find someone you can settle with and build a family of your own. All the best💕
The lady has not only traumatized the guy but the child also but only time will tell and he has done a great job I hope he heals
The guy also traumatized her girlfriend when he cheated n impregnated someone else it’s called Karma
@@pileshongwe7827 😂😂I'm really trying to feel sorry for but yall are making it hard for me
😂😂😂😂😂
@@pileshongwe7827 iif you cheat on a good man and the guy you cheat with abuses you should we say its karma or abuse its abuse?
God bless this man's heart❤️
Wow...strength to you my brother, you really deserve better. You come through as a sincere/good person and I don't wish your experience on my worst enemy. If it means anything, the universe will thank you and she'll get what's coming to her. For the child's sake I hope the child doesn't carry this void in their life as it's not their fault. Focus on YOU, remain sincere and good luck! 👍
Such a good guy! i wish they could just give him access to the child and continue with the relationship he had with the child. May God heal him!!
Such a wonderful soul, you are a good man. May you find complete healing, love and respect you deserve...
Such a good hearted guy, he doesnt deserve this😢
I am actually crying watching this man😥
Yooo sorry my brother for how bad this thing is hurting you. And thank you for being responsible by taking care of the child and going for that therapy. I pray that God gives you healing and the closure you need.
No this man is genuine 😭😭
The result of cheating 😭💔if the guy didn't cheat ngabe ayikho lento. We need to be faithful to our partners to avoid this.
Haibo sisi.. That's your takeaway from this whole story ???😂
@@thamsanqamtshali8364 remember that u bhuti ubene girl friend but wajola no baby mama ,ukube akazange ayijolele intombi yakhe ngabe losis akazange adlale ngaye. That's what am trying to say.
@@nomvelomasuku1940 so .. yes ? That was your takeaway ?
Mr Seleka is so kind🥺💗the world needs ppl like him....he's still young and may God bless him with a beautiful 👪 family 🥺
What a cold-hearted lady. She needs to apologize to both him and her son because it seems she deceived them both. It's unfortunate that people take advantage of kind-hearted people 💔
Women can be cruel
Oftentimes you cannot get closure from the people that hurt you..
Continue to heal from within, you don’t deserve what you went through, don’t leave the “victim door” open…
I agree with you sometimes we need to forget about finding closure but heal and move forward 🙏
At least he deserves to know the truth from her 😔. My heart is bleeding for both men (the guest and the son). Nobody deserves what she’s done to both of you 💔. What a loving 🥰 soul the guest is.
This guy is one of those sweet, gentlemen, good guy. Women will toy with him, he must toughen up, put him self first
This is a real gent. At no time during this interview does this man bad mouth this women. He takes accountability for he's decisions in addition to facing his childhood trauma. Sending him love and light!!!
Such good man you are healing. Proud of being open about this private personal and attending couselling you hero
This is so heartbreaking I can just imagine what goes through this guy's mind and what it does to him I really hope he finds the closure that he needs.
Some women are wicked wicked. Imagine taking the child away from his father and then demand maintenance. WHYWhy? Kele may that guy find all the help he needs to heal. Not all men are trash indeed. God bless him and may his future be brighter and beautiful.
What a Matured Gentle Man👌👌
I wish you more strength Bro. Stay strong😊✌
Wow, loved this episode, thank you so much for the amazing conversations you bring to us and how well you present them .🥺🥺 I wish him healing and happiness .
The way he cares about the boy bethuna😭
Ewe maan 🥺🥺
I know hey! The bond he had with the boy and was broken when the little guy treated him like a stranger.
Eisshh, he must find a way to move on.
No such thing as finding closure these days...
It’s his child, any man can be a father but few can be called dads, he’s a daddy type
What an amazing guy, may he find the closure he needs🙏🏾
Men like you are rare to find, you are such a gem, God bless you my guy so much so 🙏🏿🙏🏿
This girl choose him because of his financial stability.She knew ALL along that he’s not the father.
Ncncnc abafazi
According to the Children's Act, you can actually still contest for shared parenting.
Personally, I think this whole thing will be an emotional wound to the boy for the rest of his life.
I am so sorry about all this
Sending love and light to you sir. May you 1 day have a family of your own ♥️
He's such a good guy, I'm in tears Lord 😭😭😭
I’ve been waiting the whole day
Me too
Ryttttt😀
Me too hey
Me 2
me too 🥺
Big ups my brother, coming to think that Father's out there run away from their responsibilities, it's a shame... I understand your pain, everything happens for a reason. Soldier on my brother.
Am truly hurting right now....hope u heal bhudwami and know u the best father ever and may God bless you with a wonderful family and more children that will be a blessing to you on a daily basis... And u don't have to be a biological father to be a father.. I love u and am so extremely proud of u...
Your loving sister,
Sbo...
I feel for this man. May he find healing. Whatever you have gone through, don't let it take your good and caring heart. ❤
Sending you strength Seleka ❤️
Just after watching the first part.....I'm glad to be here
Kunini
Love and big hugs to this man ♥️.. be well my brother.
I love the interviewer, the guest will find closure the boy will come looking for him, his positive energy will draw him towards rather than against, just keep the energy alive.
BLESSINGS- my brother. May God Bless you always.
You know what in every situation God has something to say.
This guy has been a cheater for so long yet he had a faithful girlfriend. So sometimes ladies we pray to God so that he can take over everything.
And I believe he was not a man up so God decided to build him up .
Now he will never cheat
I can relate and am in this situation now.
God knows how to handle a cheater . Now and forever I fight my battles on my knees
Awww this is so sad, I mean she knew all along that they boy was not his that’s why she kept on treating him like shit, her time will come one day and she will regret why she treated this guy like that. I pray that he find peace and God give him someone he deserve and children of his.
So sorry brother for what you going through , hope you find healing and that your dreams for the family in the future come through
So sad that always good ppl get burned.I applaud you sir you are one of the responsible and kind man our nation need.
Heart wrenching 💔
What a great young man. Men like him are not easy to come by. I hope he meets a woman who will complement his character by taking good care of him❤️
Such sadness you must feel. Keep asking God to help you thru this and pray one day you re-unite with your son again (the bond is both in your son/your heart); he would never forget! Keep praying for him daily
Wow what a beautiful man.i wish you everything of the best for the future and hope you are reunited with your boy you are amazing
The world needs man like you
NO, the world needs men who are trustworthy , not cheaters. impregnating another woman while dating someone else is not what we need as whole nation.
There are still good men out there Shame he has a good heart ❤️
What a beautiful soul❤❤
This is so sad that good guys actually exist and they too go through such unfortunate situations. So sad how much for a child that's not his
Yho this is such a painful story...honestly hope this man gets all the happiness he deserves in life.
Oh goodness now he's making me cry.
Why don't we meet good guys like this closeby
You such a good guy and definitely good father, God will bless u