These MISTAKES Are Holding You Back From Healing Your Trauma
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- čas přidán 4. 02. 2023
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Here's a "best of" compilation of a series of my older videos about mistakes people make when healing Childhood PTSD and CPTSD. These are actions and attitudes that you may have been TOLD would be effective but if you're still stuck, try these five tips to move forward with healing faster.
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I just found your channel today and have subscribed.
So much of what you share I recognize in myself. I was almost 40 before a doctor diagnosed me with depression and anxiety, I've been on anti-depressants for 11 years, had most types of therapy, most recently EMDR.
I am finally realizing that I have got to a point where all of those things helped in the short term, but I have a lifelong condition. If someone breaks their nose or loses a finger people can see that, with PTSD I have found there is still a lot of ignorance around it, unless someone has experienced it themselves they dont understand it, that makes sense.
Thank you for your videos, your channel, and for shining a light on CPTSD. God bless you & everyone watching 🙏💛
Welcome! You're in the right place :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I feel the same🙏💜
Retraumatizing yourself: bad relationships, bad jobs, neglecting your needs....
Understanding narcissistic abuse was the key to my recovery.
Me too! And learning that we are injured by our own family.
Thank you for not giving up on us!
Yes. Im grateful for this as well 🙏
Thanks for not giving up on yourselves 💌🤗🙏 ur here, I'm here... we're not alone!
@@michelleward5167 Isn't it nice not to feel alone!
Molly is my daughters name I miss her terribly ❤
Can we normalise “BEING WEIRD”? Many of us are neurodivergent and having to be fakely normal uses use valuable energy. It could even be an ableist judgement. Wear what you want, chill out a bit, go slow, stop worrying what other people think! “What is normal anyway?!?” is a phrase that might be very freeing to humanity.
@51:59 .. I feel this. My boyfriend is very abrasive and curt… he comes from Baltimore Maryland and meeting his dad, I see where he got it from. His dad talks in a rant, he’s always yelling and he always seems confrontational.
I noticed it early in the relationship and commented on how I didn’t like it & he said “well this is me so if you don’t like it you don’t have to be with me”. I wanted to see the relationship through of course. But his way of being rubs me the wrong way. I like gentle, warm, easy going people… and I’m constantly just rubbed the wrong way by his personality. I know there’s someone out there who wouldn’t mind, and it’s not me. I need to set him free.
Set yourself free dear; it’ll most certainly get worse. Best wishes 😊
I caught myself getting disregulated last night and had stop myself before I said something stupid to my husband. He doesn't deserve that.
Yay! Score one for us!
This is why my CPSD hadn’t been diagnosed for so many years. I had been wandering about, thinking that my childhood had been nice, as I was „only“ beaten by immature parents who kept repeating what they had experienced in their childhood. Being a highly sensitive and intelligent little girl, the effects of this behavior on me were devastating though, and realizing that it came to me as a shock I’m still struggling with.
If you’re in the US CPTSD was not diagnosed because it is not a diagnosis yet.
@@BruhWhyDidTheyChangeThis well I am diagnosed and in treatment
@@whatsthestorymorningglory61 You aren’t diagnosed with CPTSD, it’s probably with something else, you should ask for a list of your actual diagnosis cuz as I said, IT IS NOT A DIAGNOSIS yet.
@@whatsthestorymorningglory61 tell me the CPTSD diagnostic code plz
I cannot agree enough. I am struggling tonight though, and taking an hour and a half to perfect a comment in a CZcams post, on a comment that you are purposely making short and sweet, for you that usually mean a short novel, and I'm too exhausted now to finish so going to bed, but thank you. Both of you the Opie and this Hero Of Mine. And guys quit fighting about the CPT code. That's not going to prove anything except everyone has Google. If you would like to share with us why you are so adamant, either of you on either side of the discussion, I think people would be interested and it would be more beneficial to try and see that both have different points of view, you're not going to change the other one, and there is no prize awarded to whomever holds onto their efforts to control something that makes them feel uncontrollable.
Anyway, thank you. Just finally hearing out loud that the shit in my head is not just shit in my head, but it is just in my head.
It was like a magic wand just released tension on some things I didn't know I was cleaning to for dear life and they were pulling me down.
Tomorrow is another one of those it's a new day you're going to see the new me, but staying with the theme of my life, tomorrow actually is the day because of the breakthrough I was able to have from listening to you stay there is a way to explain it. See, even now I don't feel like I'm part of the team.
Sorry I'm putting this under your comment, trying to not overthink things. Don't feel like I'm doing a great job, lol but I get my strength back tomorrow after school.
Night everyone. Be kind, it matters.
"Horrible mosh pit of emotions..."
I cracked up laughing at that because it reminded me of a job I held 10 years ago with an online travel agency. It was the most mentally exhausting job I ever held. Management was disorganized, the booking software was glitchy and HR didn't vet employees with enough care. I was so glad to get laid off when the company had a huge downsizing. I spent the first 30 days sleeping up to 12 hours at a stretch due to dysregulation.
People say, "You should see someone. You really should." Yeah, but a person needs to do the work, too.
Never in the history of calm down has anyone calmed down when told to calm down!
So true!! lol.
Thank you lol i find “do you need a break?” and “heres some food” to work as a better prompt for me. 😂
Finally, at some point i found info around cptsd, childhood trauma, nervous system (dis)regulation.. and pieces of the puzzle started to come together.. earlier i listened to all this advice "just forgive n forget", "just focus on the positive", "just go for ur dreams" etc.. tried to follow all that.. it never helped 🤣 omg 🥴 finally there is this info of what actually has happened to me. Explanation. Validation. Solutions. Ah-mazing 😌
So glad you're a part of our community now! -Calista@TeamFairy
I can’t talk about my child hood life to anyone. It’s too difficult to go back to my past. Hated my childhood for several reasons. I isolate myself don’t feel comfortable around crowds or other people.
Maybe The Daily Practice would help? It's free.
Solitude can be very healing. Many people don’t see that. All the best.
I hear you I'm the same as you.
Woman! I send you my love. Thank you so much for the work you do. 🙏🙏🙏
You are most welcome! -Calista@TeamFairy
@9:00 … I’d love to meet one of those doctors! I had a doctor yell and storm out at me because I said I wouldn’t fill the anxiety prescription she prescribed me for ANOREXIA… she said “if you don’t get this prescription, you will never get better, and you can never come back to see me” … I healed all by myself, with the help of an amazing friend… 6 years later and I’m fully recovered
Grrrr. I hear you.
The daily practice is amazing. I have a master degree in strategic communication and deal with cptsd... this daily practice lifts my vibration big time. I know it from heart now and can say it in my mind now if I dont have pen and paper nearby... the release part is so strong for the brain and I am so grateful you have it here for everybody , thank you 🙌❤💎❤
Thanks so much for sharing this!
-Cara@TeamFairy
I'm struggling after years of thinking I was over my childhood trauma of being bullied, until I worked at a youth correctional facility where I was essentially bullied off of the unit almost 5 month's ago, I'm in therapy, doing somatic work. I'm a Mindset and Mindfulness coach who has spent years in therapy along my journey. I've forgiven my bullies from childhood. I'm not mad at them. I can feel myself back in those moments every time I experience flashbacks of what happened to me 5 months ago. The mental pain is deep. I'm tired of mentally struggling. Thank you for this. I'm going to try
Ps. My mama just passed away from dementia and this situation is probably mixed in with this too, I'm aware, however, I'm not triggered or having panic attacks around the loss or memory of my mama.
That sounds hard! You're in the right place. I know trauma-driven thinking can be discouraging, but never forget: Healing is possible! -Calista@TeamFairy
I love your supportive advise! I'm a 61 yr old man and my own worst enemy... Bless you!
I have avoidant personality disorder because of cpstd can you maybe speak on how we are affected by personality disorders and if they can be cured
The news part is especially true for me. To avoid yelling at the TV. I have to leave the room.
I think there's value in therapy. I can tell when you talked about the relief you felt that there was some benefit because your face lit up. The feeling you're not alone. Just someone to talk to without judgement. Its like all healing. Triage, treatment and therapy. We all know when it's time to go to something else.
Thank you Abby, I love your channel because it's all about balance. When I first learned about my CPTSD about 2 weeks ago it was such a relief and I felt like a huge burden was lifted. So I started learning all I could and reaching out to every resource I could find. I noticed, however, some of the channels I've looked at from other individuals who speak on CPTSD, almost seemed to come from a place of identifying with CPTSD and identifying with trauma. I noticed my nervous system feeling dysregulated because I started feeling really overwhelmed. I realized this was retraumatizing me unintentionally. Your first statement was don't identify with your trauma. You are not your trauma, it's an injury and you can heal from trauma..., Perfect timing! Thank you 😊.
This lovely lady’s name is Anna Runkle.
@Agaricus lol, my bad. In my head I meant Anna, just didn't translate very well to my comment. Thanks for pointing it out 😊
It reminds me of swapping stories before or after an exam. The more you hear about what everyone else has been thinking or how they messed up the more overwhelming it feels
You always Tell us To write down our fears& resentment and all but I find myself sooooo confused that every time I try to do this, I don’t know what to write on that paper 😢 😢😢
I found your channel a few weeks ago and it has helped me learn more strategies for my emotional dysregulation than in my regular therapy sessions. I've learned from your videos about the isolation factor and my therapist hasn't brought that up and it's something that I have done periodically all my life when I'm too overwhelmed with my emotions. I am currently self isolating because I can't bring myself to be close to anyone right now because my energy is so up and down on a daily basis. I have also been diagnosed with BPD, MDD and PMDD. Although now I think I have been misdiagnosed which has been common in my lifetime.
I am currently pursuing my Psych degree and plan to then apply for the PHD program to be a clinical psychologist. I think that having the experiences and struggles of facing my symptoms, and learning/studying it at the same time will make me a better therapist. Only time will tell.
I'm shocked that you aren't a therapist! You know a lot of information and strategies. But then again people who live through such things are the best teachers. I love that you are straight up and don't hold back. I feel like a lot of therapist are very weary about being to blunt and direct as to not hurt the patients feelings or push them to hard but I prefer for my therapist to hold me accountable and tell me like it is.
Thank you SOOO much for your research and dedication to help others like yourself. We need it. I am implementing your techniques to see how it works for me. I also plan on becoming a member soon once I get the funds together. I appreciate you!
Remember "Grasshoper" when Kwai Chang Caine was asked by a Christian lady what he wanted from his religion Grasshoper replied to be an empty cup. A part of us fears emptiness but grasshoper realised the value of it.
I've learned so much and gained so much more emotional stability from your teaching and dating course. I thank you again for this. One area that particularly intrigues me is the question you've raised about ADHD: is it always inherited, or is it the result of neurological dysregulation from childhood trauma? Because both my parents showed signs of ADHD, and BOTH families had loads of material to produce ADHD, or CPTSD: chronic parental conflict; blatant, chronic parental infidelity; divorce; hostile, abusive in-laws as caregivers; parental death in early childhood; extreme poverty; home loss by fire; drastic displacement from environmental disaster (the Dust Bowl); loss of loved ones from war; PTSD from combat (my dad was 18 years old, in the Navy at Pearl Harbor). When I think about it, it's breath-taking what they've all accomplished in spite of all the hits they took. And yes, we've no time to lose being pissed off because establishment medicine is just barely starting to "get it." We are their teachers.
I have a similar observation about autism. Observing my son and some other children that are healing from autistic traits, also doing a lot of research to help my son with his development, I see that autism comes from injury, there's a lot of trauma response going on, but in many cases it's treatable. It's made an identity, but it doesn't have to be. When I see it as a brain response, I can look for solutions to make it work again. And it is working, specialists say it's a "miracle", he's no longer autistic, no delays.. But a lot of work has been done, and I always saw his healthy self, not only disturbed, regressed non-verbal child in his own world. He's now speaking fully appropriate to his age 6, having friends, learning, managing emotions, everything is getting together.
How is he healing and what is working to help him! Very interesting and wonderful!
Your videos are helping me heal. I had given up on getting better. Thank you.
You are most welcome! I'm so glad you found the channel, you deserve to heal :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I'm in a 12-step program with a children of Alcoholics and it's not the first step that gets you well it's all the 12 and the fourth step is where you deal with your resentment and your fears and your exact nature of your wrongs it works it's a wonderful program and there's millions of people now getting help in these programs
I understand my Cptsd I had it managed but it's only when I relapsed and discovered it went hand and hand with narcissist abuse that I understood how people were using it against me. I hear the letters and that's what I see from it....they always want to blame you....telling you how you feel or think and make it your fault they treat you bad or don't respect you. My therapist called it crazy making since it always makes you question your own thoughts, feelings and actions while they play their little games with you and the only way to stop it is stop it with them. Maybe that is just from having a duel diagnosis.
It sucks how it gets used against us folks with a diagnosis. It says so much about their issues and lack of empathy and flexibility and less about ours
That's how someone with narcissistic traits does. Gaslight, so you question yourself. They get your family on their side and triangulate against you. Get your family on their side so that your family disregard you; so your family stop believing you.
Such good teaching, Anna. You have helped me immensely for well over a year. Thank you for your love and care over the hurting and helping us heal and learn to manage our lives well. You are a blessing.
Hey, Crappy Childhood Fairy! I've been following you for a couple years now and your job is wonderful. I can truly say you've charged my life and I've never been better!
Also, have you thought about working it all out into a podcast? I bet it'll be easier for all of us to bring you along with us when we go out. Thanks!🙏🥰
Yours is about getting angry but MINE is about feeling HURT !!! and it ruins my day/week/life. I collapse into a fetal position, get paralyzed and cannot function until someone reaches IN and HELPS me HEAL it. Please HELP with this. Thanks.
You are amazing.
You are so appreciated!
-Cara@TeamFairy
Your page has been more helpful that the 3 therapists I saw to heal my cptsd🙏🏻🤍
I wonder if others deal with this:
Every year, I've noticed that I struggle emotionally with my C-PTSD symptoms during certain months
For example, the months of October and February are the worst. Halloween season, I can understand, but February?
Also, Saturday, especially Saturday night, the worst. Sundays are almost always the best day.
Certain regions are big triggers for my dysregulation. San Francisco is and was the worst.
SF is the birthplace and headquarters for the church of Satan. Deviant sexual and social behaviors are normalized there. It's too much for my emotions.
My early childhood, growing up in coastal Californian regions, was the most traumatic and destructive. Once we moved inland to a conservative community, did our family dynamics stabilize.
Anyone else notice these dynamics?
@aprilmay1700 if God called me to the SF area, I'd go, of course, but not on my own initiative.
Last year, we had a pastor from the Tenderloin section of S.F. come speak at our church in Boise, Idaho.
He said, tongue in cheek, "you people wouldn't fit into the Tenderloin. They look sad and depressed. You all look like Olympic skaters, and you look too happy".
The congregation, of about one thousand people, guffawed. But we clearly understood it was not a place to call home.
I know S.F. has upscale neighborhoods, but the political, social, and spiritual atmosphere would be too oppressive to flourish for me.
I applaud that Asian pastor from SF. He has a real heart for the outcasts of the Tenderloin.
Yes I've noticed. Certain places I visit in big cities in Florida like Miami and Orlando feel so spiritually depleting. I visit bc family is there but it's difficult. I was raised in Orlando and never want to return. I live in a much more conservative area in Florida now and I feel so much better.
@blisshayes5320 This is way out there, but hear this out.
Bob Larson, who is supposedly an expert on cults and the occult, says that coastal cities are notoriously the most wicked, crime-ridden, and socially deviant because of the "spirit of Leviathan" from the scriptures and I'm guessing mythology.
In USA, the most troublesome cities lie around large bodies of water: Seattle, Portland, SF, coastal Los Angeles, Miami, New Orleans, Detroit, Chicago, NYC, Baltimore, Boston, and other smaller coastal cities.
In the book of Revelation, "the beast" comes out of the sea. The sea was usually referenced as a place of torment, unsettled tides, violent storms, and grotesque sea creatures with no emotions or soul.
Me, personally, coastal regions, though beautiful, have been places of spiritual oppression, while inland areas more conductive to tranquility in my spirit. Hwy 395, in inland California, is my go-to oasis.
Even Anna Runkle has stated as a child that a dripping faucet was a trigger of emotional agitation. Water is a powerful element, both physically and spiritually.
Thank you Anna, you have helped me so much in my journey of healing.
Watching from Yosemite Kentucky. Thank you for the advice. This helps me a lot.
Ugh, the anxiety can ramp up so quick with just a wee nudge from others. Yes, complicates. Thank you for your hope.
We're all rooting for you! -Calista@TeamFairy
With all my gratitude thank you for sharing your knowledge. It is so very helpful at this time in my life and of course I will pay it forward. Many blessings to you 🙏 thank you for being you!
Thank you for your kind words :) -Calista@TeamFairy
Anna,
Wanted to thank u. I hive trouble figuring out getting into links below because of me. But, thank u. I have been getting understanding here. I have passed u to so many friends. One being a friend ill call tina. She died last week. She was young and suffered w s schizophrenia, and bipolar. She fought it like a trooper by serving many people. She was amazing, but watching your program helped her more than I can explain, and I want to thank you she would use the word dysregulation I’m just regulated can you pray for me. I just wanna thank you God bless you.
I'm so sorry for your loss, that is heartbreaking. We're all sending you support and will keep you in our thoughts. -Calista@TeamFairy
Did anyone find the "Things I Wish My Doctor Knew" list?
Probably you have heard about the barber who is suffering from a deep secret in his heart and couldn't free his gut from its pain. Then he went to the forest and screamed with the loudest voice he could and got it out of his system. But the story did not end there; the person who is related to that secret was walking at the time in the same part of the forest. The story ended by the forgiveness given to him from THE KING WHO THIS BARBER GIVES HIS HAIRCUT AND HIS EARS WERE LONG AND DEFORMED. The therapy you described Anna of treating one's self and sifting is heuristic. Thank you for this PEACHFUL video young lady.
Thank you so much because I have an appointment with my doctor in 6 days and I've started preparing for it today :) I haven't even opened the file yet and I know it will be exactly what I need because it was made by you! 😍🌌💫
Thank you for your kind words! Sending you encouragement :) -Calista@TeamFairy
This is a brilliant compilation of your talks covering so much ground. It has been so informative and helpful. Thanks so much, once again. Keep up the great work!
So nice of you
When I listen to you I finally understand all the overwhelm I've always been feeling, why some simple things have been so difficult for me. I come back here again and again. You provide solution and solace. Thankyou 😊🙏 you really seem like a fairy 😇🤍
At about 15.17 in - you are talking about the worry of discarding the troubling memories and that the critical ones, perhaps initially rinsed out by the practice, will reinstate themselves really quickly. What if a troubling memory is maintaining the resentment we need for protection because we know that, without the protection, we'd be sitting ducks for it to happen again? The family and relationship dynamics, that led to the trauma, are a lot more complex and take a lot longer to learn than the memories which are acting as placeholders. They're shorthand.
Is it not like taking the labels off our frozen leftovers? We can open the tub up, look at the contents, and it's kind of familiar but some ingredients are really, potentially injurious if what they are in is not properly processed. We put labels/memories on things so we don't need to rely on short term memory - if we've only just cooked something we know what we have put in the tub. We don't, though, want it getting mixed up with all the other unlabeled potential hazards.
I'm quite protective of my bad memories. They're quite protective of me. I may be a mess but I still have my life. My son has his life. Both of those things could be extinguished if I don't remember who must never find out that the slate has been wiped clean and the way is open, again.
We are trying to live without resentment, it is not my experience that means I forget how to keep myself safe. In fact, with a clear head, it's easier :)
-Cara@TeamFairy
During DBT I learned that I was stuck in the identity of a traumatised person. If I let some of it go, then what? It was terryfying.
EMDR therapy helped me see that healing is about having the memory but not the awful emotional and psychological response to it. So you see the label on the food and can go, ah yes thats the lamb casserole. But you no longer see a casserole ad on the tv and go into overdrive.
Saying there must be something to therapy because of it’s prevalence and long standing isn’t actually a valid point. Lots of things withstand time that are actually harmful and detrimental. Recognizing that there are indeed people out there who have profit in mind over our best interest is important for wisdoms sake. Just wanted to say that.
I got into a bad customer service situation at work and flew off the handle and I got physically assaulted.
Best advice ever. Thank you.
How do you not have millions of subscribers?! You're awesome, thank you ❤
Ya got me...Thank you for resources to deal with this.
You are a gift from God! Thank you so very much for all of your help you so graciously give! I'm truly grateful
Learning so much from you Anna what I'm suffering feels like quite a niche in the spectrum of trauma that's why I see it as such a blessing I found your channel. Thank you
Thank you, so accurate, so helpful, so practical
Thank you so much for these videos they are so helpful
Good bless you, you've helped me become aware of what really happens to me, literally i feel iluminated ❤. Thank you!
This made me chuckle, I love peaches and I'm a little weird. I appreciate your struggle and the strength required to share this and help others. Thank you.
Love your new hair style! ❤️
Thank you, Anna. I really needed to hear you say this. stuff. I feel so frustrated everyday that I know exactly what I need, but I don't know how to make anyone understand. I have a big idea that I have been telling myself is stupid, but I'm gonna give it a shot. I have to do something to bring awareness to CPTSD
Thank you verry much My Dear. You are a true gift to this world
If we are going to stop making CPT SD our identity, we need to stop claiming it as ours! We must stop saying MY cptsd; instead we can say the trauma I am currently experiencing.
That is all! It is just a moment in time! And we can completely heal from this, contrary to what you said in a previous video.
#1 / Don't make cptsd your identity? For those who have, how do they correct that mindset?
We have SO much support in our membership for turning that ship around. bit.ly/CCF-Membership
-Cara@TeamFairy
All this information is changing my life. So grateful for this information and thank you!
I'm so happy to hear that :) -Calista@TeamFairy
injury not identity...thank god
What a relief right?!?!
-Cara@TeamFairy
Stresses and trauma has to go somewhere , if it does not go externally it would go internally and hurt your body and brain . It has to manifest in some way. Internally it will harm your body and mind, externally it would cause a lot of problems with other people you deal with.
That's why i think your way is the best ways , aka, to discharge it out on paper .
For me personally i still can not take it out on paper ( i am being spied upon all the time) , but i think i am discharging it on private groups and social media related groups , i discharge it as posts or comments.
9:12 triggers and disregulation
Thank you so very much!!! 🥹
Thank you 🙏 you have helped me tremendously with my healing journey 🌹
I'm so glad the channel has been helpful :) -Calista@TeamFairy
Thank you so much for all you do and say to help us heal and understand what really happens when experiencing trauma.❤
Thank you for your kind words! I'm sure Anna will appreciate this :) -Calista@TeamFairy
You helped me so much move on. The female person I was with. Was an opioid addict. Induced by a doctor for 30 years. Drank Vodka. Bipolar personality. Covert Narsacistic jezebel spirit. She is out of her mind. God pulled my away from this relationship. And gave me education and support. To heal me. God will have to deal with here and her sickness. The drugs she will take to her grave. Doctors have polluted the baby boomer generation.giving out all the opioid drugs.. only to destroy people and family and relationships. So sad. Later.
🎉 5:20 finding the you that can
6:12
Dear Anna, it would be so great if you made a video on the techniques of interacting with triggeribg customers when you have a childhood PTSD. I often feel that people feel my vulnerabilities and very successfully target me which triggers overwhelmingly emotional distegulation that lasts for days, prevents me from thinking cleanly, affects my decision making and worst of all winds me up to the point that I cannot sleep between shifts which only brings my functionality even more down.
I work in the nursing field and often felt that because it becomes so overwhelming recenly especially during and after pundemic, I need to do somethibg else and this field will never be better. But I am in my 50's, it brings good income and I hate to go to school and get myself in debt again just to find out that in a different field the situation is equally overwhelming and I am not coping very well.
I have been listening to you for awhile. OMG. I want to write to you because my story could be a book. In fact a friend who is writing a book and does counseling , she has used a few things I've said in her book.I need your advise in the worst way. A childhood of many kinds of abuses and their motto was children should be seen and not heard into a marriage of 52 years of a abusive and seen but not heard. My mom was married 3 times. I had done therapy 5 times through the years and I finally got an anger workbook and it helped me put it behind me. Then the abusive marriage. My health has gotten so bad. I left for week and a half very recently and felt so relaxed and strong. Didn't even have cataplexy with my narcolepsy
Something I wish more people checked for in these populations - vitamin deficiencies!
Ya a therapist 24 yrs ago paper joournal was recommended.
That makes sense my mum was an alcoholic and died our story sounds similar. Will join that you posted . Can you suggest a strategy to cope with trying to heal but still being dragged through court by ex as feel im doing amazimg but still got that ongoing ❤ and you have just answered the question giving my power away think maybe ?
Can u make us a booklist? Thanks so much for all your work.😊
crappychildhoodfairy.com/resources/
I've been using food to make myself feel better since I was @ 7 yrs old, so I'm fairly overweight. I told my therapist that I want to be half of my size. She sneered, "Yeah! Like that's gonna happen ...." 😧😧😧
I am so sorry that happened. I have had my own issues with therapist...Sadly, it doesn't surprise me.
Maybe consider shopping for anew therapist. We have to consider that therapy is like any other consumer product. If it doesn't fit you, get another one?
So sorry that happened to you. I recommend getting a new therapist. When I was obese and was diagnosed with diabetes my doctor threw up his hands and had an exasperated tone of voice. I showed him and myself that I could take control of the situation. I went on Noom (any weight loss app or program is good) which worked for me, stopped drinking, stopped sugar and white flour, started walking every day and lost 58 pounds. My mental and physical health are greatly improved. Then I got a new doctor who has totally supported me. You can do it.
OUCH!!! That's a terrible response, I can't imagine.
-Cara@TeamFairy
Please change the therapist, she is not supporting you. I had one to tell me that I will not be lucky if I lose the weight and damn was she wrong. Losing the weight itself is not going to make you solely a different and happy person if you do not deal with the other issues but your therapist seems to have her own set of issues. Did you know that 70 percent of women have some kind of disordered eating? What I find helpful are ideas from the books Binge no more and Brain over binge as well as working with a dietician to help stabilize my blood sugar levels. I also abstained almost completely from not only different sources of sugar in my diet but also additional sweeteners, higher amounts of fat and salt in my diet. Coupled with an honest private food journal and regular walks every day and hiking I am seeing amazing results. You can have them too but need to way a way that works for you and is sustainable
5:44
11:09 we're a little different, not wrong
Dont what to talk anymore about it ended up on a plane last time 😂 thats the fun side to cpsd crazy ideas and just going off ha
What do you think of EMDR?
To Anna and all people that feel ashamed/shame because of probably they were told so as kids from strange parents and other adults:
You can and will feel different from your siblings, because you went through different experiences, conciously and subconciously. And through different trauma!
Mostly siblings do not experience the same trauma, allthough they live in the same family. But there are often huge differences. As example:
You have two younger siblings...when your mother was pregnant with you, as the oldest, she was in a very bad and violant relationship to your father, where she got hit and screamed at and abused, then even you are in her whomb, you get every emotion of her and all the stresshormones like if you were her.
(From pastregression sessions IT IS known, that sometimes the soul of a baby leaves it's own body in the whomb, for a while, when it's too tough what the mother has to go through, and so the baby too! And comes back into the body while or short before birth. So this could save it's soul a bit. But the physical body was allready flooded with adrenalin and cortisol etc. The stresshormones...).
So and through a bit luck or desteny and probably a change in the mother (through inner work...and sometimes without too), she separated from that cruel father of the first child and married another, maby a bit healthier man.
During the pregnancies of the two younger siblings, she didn't experience this horror and abuse against herself. So the babies didn't get these stresshormones as the First child got. So their psychic system and even their physical system is as babies much more relaxed and in peace. (Never the less, every soul brings an own character to the earth, too. It's not just how the parents are).
Anyway, later on, the second man starts drinking and gets mad to all children, so to the stepchild too. One could say, while not knowing the whole story, that it's wired that the first child has more problems in live, because they think, all siblings went through the same.
But this is false!!! The First Git all this bad start into live as unborn baby and as small child, until the mother separeted. And then it has to deal with an absent father! And probably one that is never ever mentioned by the mother again, because she wants to forget the horror. So there is a lie and denial torwards this kids parent. And there is sadness and shame, that His mom married the second father, but was never married to it's father. That's pretty hard to a child.
And according to all this, this child gets too of the anger of the second husband.
So the First child got more Bad stuff to deal with, than the two younger ones.
So we can never ever compare !!!
Allow me to ask you your opinion about EMDR and IFS (internal family systems).
Thanks 🙂
EMDR yes.
Yes that true about smoking dont enjoy it but it helps me keep to a routine. Symtom is the embarrisment and overwhelm around people feel a weirdo espectially when get certqin ideas 😂😂
Anna, when I try to do the writing when in a good mood, it kind of drags me down or I become irritable?
I have been doing so well lately, but had a big relapse last week, struggling to pick up the pieces 😞
Please join a Daily Practice call so you can get some help with your technique. I have a call coming up Monday. If you've taken the course, you'll get an e-mail reminding you to register.
Where's the cptsd list "you wished your therapist had told you about" that I can print and discuss with the therapist?
Please email us at hello@crappychildhoodfairy.com so we can assist you! -Calista@TeamFairy
Hi 👋 !!! Sorry, where is the sheet about the 12 things I wish my doctor understood about PTSD? Thanks 🙏
10:58
So if you have the same fear everyday do you write that down every day in the daily practice.
yes. whatever is on your mind when it's writing time.
I have been diagnosed with ptsd, but I believe its cptsd. I am confused when you say heal the symptoms. I'm in therapy but its making me worse. My therapist said today my progress is slow. She keeps pushing but its just making me angry. She wants me to confront my mother and tell her how the abuse stuffed me up. Mt therapist said I can't heal unless I do.
Yikes. Anything that just keeps making you feel worse is not therapeutic. The advice to confront and belief that you can only heal if you do, sounds gravely misguided. I hope you'll keep watching here and learn practical tips for feeling better, putting the past in perspective and focusing your healing efforts on your own life.
39:32 terrible treatment. Having listened to whole letter sounds as if you were not allowed to express your emotions and feelings, that they were not accepted.
How can I send her a letter?
Here's a link to our website, it explains how to send in a letter: bit.ly/CCF_Letters
-Calista@TeamFairy
Anything in Spanish?
I lost all for abuse every you tube clip is me redflas misstacs and lost a lot for my weak boundaries and people pleasing. On my bottom alone and isoleded and try to fokus with daly practice and regelation but see mu isoleded and toxic shame is trigger me to not really fokus .see i need more friend connection friends .my smoking and depression hinder my healing .what can i do . nobody to talk to that understand this .
Isolation is really hard, and it’s often a CPTSD symptom. If you’re interested, Anna has a course to help called Connection Bootcamp. bit.ly/CCF_Connection
Nika@TeamFairy
😂
I seem not to find the "12 things, I wish my doctor would know about CPTSD. May someone help me, please? ❤ Thank you. YOU ARE AMAZING, @crappychildhoodfairy
Absolutely! Here's a link: bit.ly/3ZCiZDp -Calista@TeamFairy
Wow! Thank You Anna! Thank You for All of this Personal Information! I’m working your Steps! It Helps so much- I’m Listening to my Body when Triggers- happen.
CPTSD.
Writing does Help!
So glad to hear that! Keep up the great work!
Nika@TeamFairy
Thank you for all this awareness so well appreciated ❤ @lorraineamicothemakeupartist