Are You Avoiding This in Therapy?
Vložit
- čas přidán 14. 08. 2019
- Dodging questions may be something we have done our whole lives in order to stay safe and okay. This could have been by lying in order to not be abused or mistreated, or even by side stepping questions that could make a parent or friend mad by distracting them with something else.
It’s very normal to dodge questions that are difficult or uncomfortable, it’s like a defense mechanism. And I say all of this so you know it’s not bad that you do this, it’s actually perfectly normal, and part of self preservation. I have patients change the subject, try to ask about me and my life, give me information or share a story that has nothing to do with what we are working on, and overall try to avoid talking about real issues in therapy.
Honestly, overcoming these defenses is a lot of the work that I do every day with my patients. It could be trying to ask a question in a different way, or starting with someone more recent that isn’t as emotionally charged. It could even be taking a step back and building up resources first. It’s really not very common that I have a patient come into my office and be so open and honest and have no issue talking about anything I ask.
But remember that defense mechanisms and self preservation techniques don’t really have a place in therapy because the goal is to push through those as much as we can and open up. Which I know is really really hard, but is really the core of therapy, because our therapist can’t help us or offer helpful tools if they don’t know what’s really going on.
12 Defense Mechanisms
• Do You Know Your 12 DE...
I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
#katimorton #therapist #therapy
MY BOOKS (in stores now)
Traumatized geni.us/Bfak0j
Are u ok? bit.ly/2s0mULy
ONLINE THERAPY
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: betterhelp.com/kati
Join this channel to get access to perks:
/ @katimorton
PATREON www.katimorton.com/kati-morto...
YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS
Instacart: www.instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB
Amazon: www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton
PARTNERSHIP
Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com
PLEASE READ
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room.
Absolutely 😊
I'm going to use this on my exam...
Anytime I start shutting down in therapy my therapist will either start asking me about my dog or talking about hers and I really appreciate.
Therapist: “....so why do u think ur marriage wasn’t successful?”
As always, your advice overflows with love and patience. Kati, you are a genuinely good person, through and through! When I notice I'm avoiding a question, I will oftentimes force myself to consciously grimace or nonverbally signal to my therapist that there is more to say, even if I can't say it yet. She always picks up on these cues. 🙂
i'm super honest with my therapist. if i'm not comfortable, i just straight up say "I don't want to answer that. Sorry"
My therapist is sooooo good at seeing when I’m avoiding an answer, and knowing when to try to push me, and when to leave it alone for now.
reads title
I needed to hear her voice today. Been crazy.
This is me!!!! I avoid questions and conflict like the plague! 100% because of abuse. Working on this exactly with my therapist!
I hope to be as loving, caring, open-minded as you to help everyone I can when I graduate as a Clinical Psychologist.
I am SOOO guilty of this. Trying to hide how i'm really doing to my friends and family by deflecting, asking about them and changing the subject etc etc. Anything to have the attention on me. It's something i've been trying to work on for monthsssss. We STAN an honest queeeeen
"Are you avoiding this in therapy?"
Kati, thank you so much! These tactics are what I really needed right now. Thanks a ton. You're helping thousands of people
I use to be like this, but I am very open with my therapist now. There were times when I would just ask for a pad of paper to write stuff down because I just could not say things out loud. SO thankful I have an amazing therapist.
I just started therapy yesterday. This is going to be rough but I know it is needed. Your videos have helped me be more comfortable with the idea of therapy. Thank you.
I didn't know I needed this video but you've really changed my entire perspective, because this is one of my biggest issues in therapy!
I know I dodge questions in my everyday life, but I try really hard not to because if I can’t open up to my therapist, who can I open up to? I’m wasting my time and not going to get any better.
Your videos always feel very calming and helpful to me! Just hearing your "happy Thursday!" puts me in a good mood. Thank you for all the work you put into your videos, they're very wonderful!
Wow, thanks, it was exactly the video I needed because I'm always dodging questions because I don't wanna feel bad and cry in front of others, and your video just helped me realize that. I will try to do all your exercices, they look really helpful ! And you're right, therapy is incredibly hard.