Clear Expectations for Yourself and Your Partner in a Strong Relationship
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- čas přidán 29. 09. 2020
- Thank you for watching this powerful interview with Matthew Hussey!
Check out the show notes here: www.lewishowes.com/811
Matthew Hussey is a speaker, New York Times Bestselling author, columnist for Cosmopolitan Magazine, and dating expert on ABC’s digital series What To Text Him Back. His corporate clients include Hugo Boss, The Perfume Shop, Virgin Gyms, Procter & Gamble, Bare Escentuals, U.S. legal giant Weil Gotshal & Manges, and global management consultants Accenture. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online.
Matthew says that the “activation energy” for starting relationships is lower than ever. This causes ghosting. People are less invested in relationships. But there are ways you can meet people indirectly. So get ready to learn the three things you need to build a great relationship on Episode 811.
Follow Matthew Hussey here:
www.matthewhussey.com/
/ matthewhussey
/ thematthewhussey
/ gettheguyteam
You can follow Lewis at:
Website: lewishowes.com/
Instagram: / lewishowes
Facebook: / lewishowes
Twitter: / lewishowes
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Lewis Howes' New Book - The Mask of Masculinity
lewishowes.com/man
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Lewis Howes is a NY Times Bestselling author, entrepreneur, and former professional Arena League football player. He hosts The School of Greatness, a talk show distributed as a podcast. Learn and hear the stories of various successful people around the world, become inspired, motivated and educated with the SCHOOL OF GREATNESS. lewishowes.com/book
I love that every time I watch one of your videos, I value my time and my self development more than stressing about dating someone that's not compatable for my life goals and desires.
How are you doing 😊😊👋☺️
I really need to think about breaking up rn, 3 months in I invested so much and he barely put any effort in, and I just stupidly thought “once he’s not this busy, once he got the time”, I’m not able to treat him like a king anymore if he doesn’t treat me like a queen.. we definitely need to have a conversation
This is a wonderful analogy...My husband and I have been through thick and thin together....debts, starting over financially, illness, adult children and his cognitive decline and we made a commitment to each other over and over. That is a committed relationship.
Beautiful Donna 💝
This is unbelievable advice. We get lost in the idea of how perfect a person is within the first date and overlook the relationship of highest value which is a process, a commitment to building together. This is not an overnight romantic relationship. Its probably not one full of exciting dates and endless nights of hot sex. It’s one of confidence, struggle, support, bare honesty and emotional availability. The commitment to a person without conditions and with trust to see whether you both can, and want to build together. No overnight perfect partner here. This is a rare and true love. Excellent advice also to pacing relationships. This kind of relationship may take months/years. But the persistence and consistency of that person will trump any fuck boy that comes into your life. Thank you.
This literally brought me to tears. I cannot even tell you how much this portrays exactly how I feel about relationships. Thank you thank you so very much for these incredibly inspiring words. ❤️
Hi kelley how are you today im ibrahim from egypt and im 36 years old I admire for your comment and It really thrills me to see a beautiful and adorable woman like you with such an amazing smile, I really would love to learn more about you but that is if you don't mind sending me a friend request.thank😍👍❤️🌹🇪🇬
11:26 mark hit me hard. He hit it on the nail for how I felt in my last relationship. You can be in love but not necessarily happy. It’s hard to differentiate true happiness when you are in love. Your body and mind is giving you all the feel good hormones (dopamine, oxytocin,etc).. So, your body and mind are convincing you that you’re happy but your heart feels heavy and weighted. I didn’t feel like my partner respected me. I often felt overlooked or undervalued but my defense mechanism is denial. I would convince myself of all the “space mountain” moments and the things that he did that showed me that he loved me. The micro experiences . The sentiment override but every time he interrupted me, withheld communication, pitted me against one of his friends or created this narrative that I was unreasonable or stubborn, or convinced me that the conversation never happened... my heart sank. It felt heavy. It’s hard when you finally get to that vulnerability to realize that you fell in love with the wrong person.
Wow, this shit is life changing. I'm having painful flash backs to, coincidentally, an Orlando holiday with my ex but at the end of day, he wasn't there when I just needed a god damn hug.
I was always in love, the whole 7 years, up until the day he left, but my God, I was so sad.
Your so right after lock down I really hope people will start to truly appreciate things like the supermarket, shops and even you tube, people taking the time to try and help and advise,the time and trouble that has been put into just about everything in life that we all everyday take for granted thank you Matthew you ve helped me in so many ways xxx
WoW Matthew!! That is beautiful feedback about getting down to what's really real in human dynamics, and what has the most depth and meaning... raising everyone up is how we all get there eventually....
I would say it’s the space mountains and the trash cans in a successful relationship. Definitely agree with the builders analogy - that is genius. So many see the potential and not build with you. But building with the right compatible match who’s blue prints match yours, is so much easier and much more enjoyable on the journey
Great analogy! Couldn't agree more! Thank you!
I really needed to listen that. All my regrets have gone away.
So true... it made me think. Thank you!
I also think of it as like the fabric of life, as opposed to the logo (the highlights).
You can focus on having a flashy logo, but paying attention to having quality fabric makes it last longer
Our beautiful TAPESTRY 💝
This was perfect. Thank you so much.
I really want to meet matthew one day as he seems intellectual person with deep knowledge who will always teach me something new
This blew my mind. I was left building the castle during my 7year marriage.
Hold on tight & bring a Cap't on
I was married for 20 yrs to someone who showed his true colors- a controlling manipulative person. It was hard and now I’m free! The man I’m with now I fell in love with him at first sight... it’s not bullshit! We have a son and are engaged :) just wanted to share guys♥️🤟🏻 I’ve never been this happy 😊
I love the depth of this 💕
The best advice and so true! Reality and the basis of really loving someone.
👍
Haven’t watched this guy for years - he’s awesome now
He was not awesome then? 🤔
Creating the CASTLE!!! YES 💝
Love how you’ve explained the core of relationships. The trash cans really connected with the understanding. Thank you! ❤️
How are you doing 😊😊👋☺️☺️
I thought the exact same thing about the bins in Disney World. And the fact that Disney world was designed so that you are never more than 6m away from one- because they cared that much about the park ☺️
Yes! The trash cans video is still my favourite.
He's amazing
This was so true to me a year ago. I was waiting for this man to build the relationship but he was hot and cold. I should've walked away sooner.
Love the co-building your castle together! 😊🙏❤
Yes! Hands on!
now this, this was a good one
The small things matter most.
How are you doing 😊😊👋☺️☺️
Love his analogies
I agree with that statement regarding arguments or disagreements in order to come to some sort of standing or compromised or disagree to disagree you can't do it and attacking way or crew way you have to just focus on what it is you don't agree with or having issues with and stress why it affects you the way it does and see if you can't come to some sort of compromise
Excellent!
This was deep.. trash cans and building a foundation really moved me.
wish I heard this earlier.. how can u fix a situation of spiteful nd unforgotten comments??
Omg I can’t agree more!!
I love the castle analogy.....my prince constantly leaves the building! 🤣
How are you doing 😊😊😊👋☺️☺️
I love this !!!
How are you doing 😊😊👋☺️☺️
That was hilarious, your correlation with the trash cans!
God I loved the video so much thankyou
Good stuff👍
I always do this to build a strong connection to a relationship...
1.have a meaningful conversation..
2. Show you care...
3.give love...
But it's nothing! Why?
Just be sure you leave room for someone to also do this for you. ❤️
I loved All this he talked about.
Thank You
improving my english in listening to mathew's speech
🧡
True Love is acceptance and not expecting the other to be like oneself. With True Love both are builders and weather all the storms in life because we are a Sanctuary for one another yet feel like we can accomplish every heart desire and dreams together. Great Castle analogy! Sad to hear he doesn’t believe in “love at first sight”... it exists and you know when it happens because you realize how all other relationships were faint, shallow, a shadow counterfeit and a compromise of the real deal some get to experience as True Love.
Love the trash can concept. I gauge the quality of a restaurant based on the level of care they put in the bathrooms! Hahaha.
My old teacher used to say "you can judge any place by the toilets" . ...xx
Yes!
Wow!!!
"Like buying a castle?" xD (yeah I wish!)
How are you doing 😊😊👋☺️👋
Lewis, please get both Matthew and Stephan L on together, that would really be something special ❤️💙
How are you doing 😊😊👋☺️
*Sooo good.*
💯 👍 💜
The plot of land is *just* potential.
#staywell everyone
💚
Being in love 😍 versus *being happy.*
♥️
Depends on a couples priorities together: We chose to have a happy marriage... to laugh, have fun and be happy every day together. When it came to occasional conflicts... My wife sometimes reminds me that she’s a happy person even though she’s not happy with something I need to make up for so I don’t get confused and need to build intimacy with her again.
Remembering the highlights is like watching the recap of a cricket match on the news lol
Those are literally the only times anything actually happened in the whole game
Hi Matt Good Nights From Singapore! How Do You Knows When A Guy Or A Man Really Likes Or Adores A Woman If He Never Approach Or ConFess His True Feeling's To A Woman? How To Knows If He Is Shy, Quiet, Charming Or AwkWard To A Commited Relationship? Can A Guy Commit & Build A Family's In The Near Future's? What Does Loyalty Means To Hold On His Needs Versus His Wants Or His Expectations Really Get His On Mind Or Soul Or Heart? Will A Guy Takes Times To Trust A Woman If He Still Harbour Bad Or Hurt From His Previous Relationship And Will Not Get A Rebound To Be Able To Stays Together & Grows Together?
Thats word
Yes there is such a thing as love at first site. Mathew Mconahy did. And others . Also marriages fall apart after 20 years. Why do you think?
I always looked into the trash cans for men, now I realize in what context I should think about trash cans
BEST PART AT 7:00
"Can it be half a$$ed" loved that💯
18 years I was building on my own.....
How are you doing 😊👋☺️☺️
Well I'm going out after this an buying a nice trashcan
see space mountain is terrifying for me. The highlight for me is sitting at the bottom of a ride with a candy floss...
Am I the only one who feels they are on a date. They can't stop looking and smiling to each other. I can imagined after their conversation. They both said. " I had a great time with you"
I think they are building a wonderful castle...
LOL. then he starts talking about trash cans LMAO, "they moved me"
I want a motor home
lol
It’s the faking trash cans duuuuudddes... lol
What if one person does all the timbers and one person does all the bricks and they complain "but *I* did all the bricklaying! You did none of it!"
Laugh about the same things. That's the Foundation. Ying has to find it's Yang.
Build your doors narrow...windows high and narrow...plenty of evergreens...fruit tree orchard...fig trees...grapevines...cover all wiring in metal tubing to keep rodents from chewing it and starting a fire...
Hello anne how are you today im ibrahim from egypt and im 36 years old i admire for your comment and It really thrills me to see a beautiful and adorable woman like you with such an amazing smile, I really would love to learn more about you but that is if you don't mind sending me a friend request.thank🌹😍❤️👍🇪🇬
@@ibrahimhamada5751 I do not mind a friend request
I am a nurse...commercial artist...studied mechanical drafting also
@@annemann9134 can you get to know each other for what's up
@@ibrahimhamada5751 clarify...are you meant ng whatsapp
#trashcans
혼자 살자
So I was right...relationships are trash 🗑
Just me or someone farted at the beginning???