Autism Elopement | What Do Our Nights look like Now??
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- čas přidán 29. 08. 2024
- The worst, most terrifying experience I've had being a parent was the night Kaidale escaped. I would give anything to make sure that never happens again. I worry about it, I loose sleep about it, it haunts me every day. This video recaps that night and the important topic of autism elopement. I want to bring awareness to this subject because it is so very important from a safety perspective.
Links for safety items!
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Kaitlyn, please dont say that u failed as a mom. A failed mom wouldnt buy any safety locks right after that. A failed mom wouldnt put his pic on the police database. Ur a great mom who loves kaidale, who will do anything to protect him. Ur not a failure. Ur a great awsomeness mom who succeded.
For example life is about learning from ur mistakes. We all made mistakes in the past. My big mistake was that i met this idiotic ex fiance who dved me. I dont consider myself as a failure. Which my mom does, but thats another story. I consider it a learning experience who i dont trust guys too fast.
Wakako Tsujita Agreed! She’s an amazing mother!
My son is almost 4 years old and frequently elopes.. so I definitely feel your struggle. He also doesn’t keep clothes on... ever. It’s very difficult for him, even at preschool. One morning I woke up and he had opened his window and climbed out and shut the window behind him. I’ve got security locks on all doors and windows now too, but definitely not taking any more chances either. The guilt and shame is hard to overcome, I’m still working through it.. just doing the best I can and your videos definitely help just knowing someone else understands and feeling like I can relate to your stories. Thank you for what you do ❤️
I have a 10 year old on the spectrum and when we were on holidays in spain (we are Irish) we lost him on a packed beach. He was missing for 45 mins until my husband found him about 4 kms up the beach. The fear and dread is hard to explain to anyone else. I still get bad anxiety about it 5 years later. You might have a bit of PTSD from it
You did not fail your son. You are the best mum ever for him.
That's why in Kaidale's case Florida's 'stand your ground' immunity is so very scary.
I saw Kaidale on FA today with his amazing caregiver G! Mean kids making fun of his Stims! So maddening! I sure hope you have some rest after a 24!
That is totally terrifying, my autistic son is 22 now and was doing sleepwalking and trying to elope from the house at night when he was about 7 or 8, but thankfully I had alarms on the doors and he only tried it once when he was awake and once when he was sleepwalking, but not since. My son is verbal now but he has a fear of the police so I'm terrified every day he'll be shot for noncompliance if he's ever stopped. I'm a single mom too and still working to support us since he will always live at home, there are times when he's not with me that I'm the most scared, he's a big guy at 6'3' and I worry the police won't recognize he's just a gentle giant that will freeze and shut down if someone yells at him. We have practiced how to give his wallet with his ID and a card I made that explains his condition and who to call in an emergency. I've been blessed that he's been able to take classes part-time at our local college and that keeps him busy while I'm at work but this fall is his last semester so I have no idea what the future will hold for him then? He doesn't hit the milestones like everyone else but he's still hitting them in his own time. Our life is different than others but it works for us because it works for him. You're a great mom and exactly the mom Kaidale needed to make it in this world, he's wonderful and I appreciate you sharing these stories with the younger parents out there going through this, 22 years ago I had no help, no services, and no support outside of my parents.
I can only imagine how hard it is to have an eloper. When my son was younger he wouldn’t wear clothes either even now in the middle of winter in shorts and tshirt. This is so hard I cry for you at these horrible thoughts. No wonder you have anxious times 🥺❤️
Kaitlyn, not even close to be a failed mom. You are honestly one of the most Amazing special need kid mom I know. You care for your son beyond words. You inspire me everyday. FYI, I have a 5 year old son on Autism spectrum. He is my 🌎 I feel your pain 💯 percent every time you talk about the night your son went missing.
Ur great mom don't ever think any different
As a mom you did NOT fail. Honestly children have this crazy way of scaring the living daylights out of us. My son is grown and when he was about 4yo we were cleaning our fish tank. We were draining the water outside, our son decided to follow the water. As a mom I freaked out. All the crazy, horrible things went through my head. You are doing everything you can to protect him. Keep doing that and you will always be a successful mother.
What a really horrible thing to go through, I tried to contact our local police force over here in England to give them my twins details just as a precaution and they wouldn't take them. I wish our police were as pro active as yours. I'm petrified this will happen with mine as ones a massive elopement risk :(
My heart hurts for you. I have anxiety at night completely revolved around my son eloping. He’s slipped out the garage in the middle of the day (through the laundry room-opened the garage door and sat in the drive way) I heard the garage door open and I ran across the house trying to find him. That one little incident terrified me of what he’s capable of. We have baby proof latches on all our appliances and exterior doors. We are moving to a less busy neighborhood so I’m not terrified of him running in the street and getting hit by someone speeding by. We have a deadbolt on our front door that is up high and hard to open in general. Noah hasn’t tried to open windows or unlock the baby locks yet. I’m sure he will one day but we are having an alarm system installed specifically for keeping him IN.
You are a great mom and your love for your child shines through and through..you mentioned something though that scared me to death and made me burst into tears just thinking of all the what ifs when he gets older. Hopefully elopement slows down the older the child gets, right ? Maybe by that time everyone in your community will know Kaidale and he will stay safe. All I know is the love you have for each other will guide you and give you the strength to accomplish anything with and for your beautiful boy. My oldest son is also on the spectrum with aspergers and he got married last year...I'm in Florida too and if you ever do a meet & greet I would come meet y'all.
I don’t think a Mom ever stops worrying. I still worry about my adult kiddos.
Your a wonderful mom, we don't have instructions nor a crystal ball with children , even more so for special needs . You rock.
Your an awesome mom. You did the right thing by getting those locks for Windows. Your doing great. I know it's hard but you got this. You can see how much he is loved
I feel for you Kaitlyn...keep reaching out, and relying on friends, family and aba therapists. My heart broke for you that post😥but, stop blaming yourself (it will only add to your stress)
Glad he's safe and happy, hopefully this is just a phase and they can work on it at school so you can get some rest knowing he's safe in the apartment. For now just keep doing what you're doing cause your an amazing mama and its noticeable that your son loves you dearly.
Your baby has challenges no one has imagined, you kiddo is safe autsim is hard your doing amazing for him keep ur head up you got this and i love you and ur family and here for you as support
I know you will carry that night with you for a long, long time. You are an amazing mom and you have taken every precaution you can. Just trust in yourself sweetheart. Kaidale couldn't ask for a better mommy.
I wonder if you’ve heard of of Sleep Safe beds, especially as an option as he gets bigger and stronger, so that even if he wakes up while you are asleep, he’s safely enclosed and can’t try the doors and windows (and locks).
Girl you are a wonderful selfless momma!!!!
I can relate to everything you said. And my kid is 16, and is a big kid. He's "man-sized," as we said the other day. We have had to install a special deadbolt for the door (it's only one door, as it's an apartment) that can be only opened with a key, and use a safety device called SafetyNet. It was definitely a huge reality check the first time he did it.
My husband had altimeter's.He was always taking off down the road.I would wake up to people bringing him home.So yes I know the fear! My sleep pattern is still messed up! He has been gone six months .love you all!
Wow I am sorry for your hard times together at last and for your loss also. Hope you can enjoy life again/soon. You seem to be super strong!
I feel your pain, Kaitlin.🙏🏾♥️
Alpha stim works wonders for me. It got me through being widowed unexpectedly with a 2 year old without drugs. Or alcohol for that matter. I highly recommend it.
Hello Kaitlin and kaidale 😘🥰🙏
LOVE you guys to the MOON & BACK❤
GIRL YOU ROCK AT BEING A MOM.😘
Hey thanks for sharing your stories. My son has autism he is 6, he likes to run at times and he’s getting faster. My answer to that is to get a service dog... but I would really like get your thoughts on service dogs and why you would or wouldn’t get one. I want to make sure I can protect my child as he get older and faster, but getting a service dog is a large commitment. So if you get this message and wouldn’t mind sharing your thoughts on service dogs I would love hear your thoughts. Thank you!
Kristine
You have no reason to feel bad or feel shame, Like you said you didn't know the windows could even open and he has never done that before. But I cannot even imagine how you live day-by-day with that amount of fear not only about him running off but with everything, You know as a mom of course we fear a lot of different things with our kids, But I could not imagine having to add all that extra fear of a child with special needs. He Is one lucky kiddo To have such an amazing mom like you.
You may have seen this already but try safetytat.com. Temporary custom made and write on tattoos that last for awhile specifically for kids, particularly with special needs. I'm a behavior health RN and had a family that used something similar for their little eloper. Best wishes ❤
Kaitlin you are amazing x stay safe guys x
Hey Kaitlyn, yes those stories sound very traumatizing, I can’t imagine. You did not finish telling the second story when the alarm went off and you tripped. So what happened that time, did he get out? Or was he rattling with the windows? I’m curious to know what happened that night. Thanks
Made me really sad hearing this but you got this what doesn't brake ya makes you stronger
💞HUGS💞
I know it's not a pleasant prospect but have you considered locking him in his room at night he will still get up at night but he will be safe in his room he could get into danger wondering around the apartment at night.
You ate an amazing mom, Kaitlin!
I know you are probably too busy to answer, but I’d love to know what age eloping becomes a big issue, my son takes of in public and every time we try to play outside (we try a baby leash, but he will just fight and fight to take off toward the road instead of playing most of the time, so we don’t even get to play outside often) but he is little enough that is more an extra effort than a concern because I can just scoop him up when needed and he can’t open door knobs yet because of his fine motor delay. But I don’t want to be unprepared and something happen because of that either,
I just wonder at what age I start taking extra precautions I guess if this behavior continues
Can I point you to the videos of fathering autism I think thay might be able to help advise you
We’re close friends💕 thank you for supporting them as well as my channel!
service dog may be option
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
🤗
Ali Max. Z