The ABC's of Autism | 40 Terms You Should Know as an Autistic Adult
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- čas přidán 17. 08. 2023
- This video includes definitions for 40 important terms related to life as an autistic adult.
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FOR FURTHER STUDY...
Pathological Demand Avoidance: www.pdasociety.org.uk/what-is...
Autistic Inertia: autisticinertia.com/
Double Empathy, Explained: www.spectrumnews.org/news/dou...
Autism and Eating Disorders: embrace-autism.com/autism-and...
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DISCLAIMER: Taylor Heaton is not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. Her services do not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals. Please note that Taylor can’t take any responsibility for the results of your actions, nor any harm or damage you suffer as a result of the use, or non-use of the information available through her website, CZcams Channel, or social media accounts. Please use judgment and conduct due diligence before taking any action or implementing any plan or practice suggested or recommended by Taylor Heaton or Mom on the Spectrum. Please note that Taylor doesn't make any guarantees about the results of the information you may apply from her website, CZcams channel, and/or social media accounts. Taylor shares educational and informational resources that are intended to help you succeed in navigating life as an autistic adult. You nevertheless need to know that your outcome will be the result of your own efforts, your particular situation, and innumerable other circumstances beyond Taylor's knowledge and control. Taylor is an Amazon affiliate and may receive commissions on qualifying purchases from affiliate links. Taylor is a Flare affiliate and may receive commissions on qualifying purchases from Flare links.
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You are a beautiful person worthy of love!
#actuallyautistic #momonthespectrum #autisticadult
I would add "shutdowns" to the list. They serve the same purpose as meltdowns, but with the opposite strategy. I shutdown when I'm overloaded with demands (especially the demand to mask) and stimuli. I get very quiet and terse. I try to separate myself from people and end whatever situation I'm in with as little conflict as possible. I seek out dark empty rooms. It's a survival strategy that replaced meltdowns because the "fighting back" strategy of meltdowns often made my situation worse.
Thanks for sharing this perspective!
I shutdown, I'm not going to act out, it creates problems which I don't need. Very quiet, get away !!! I run for my life.
I just suggested the same. I think it is an important term.
When I started learning about autism, the talk of meltdowns disconcerted me, as I don't have meltdowns. Then someone suggested that perhaps I had shutdowns instead. Yes, I tend to withdraw. If I can manage to get away by myself, that's the ideal. If not, I tend to get extremely grumpy.
I think a good strategy, if you're going to be with people or in a noisy, crowded place, is to locate right at the beginning a quiet area where you could take refuge for a few minutes when it gets overwhelming. You could could even arrange it beforehand with the host. The bathroom is a stopgap, but you can't be in there half an hour.
And as a last resource, mumble some inanity about catching the last bus, and run.
Taylor, you might not even be able to see the full extent (probably not) but you are doing such life-changing work for SO many people. This information is so fun to watch and easy to digest. You putting the time, care, energy, and love into these videos is creating a ripple effect that is changing this world and allowing Autistic people to, bit by bit, one by one, access self acceptance and healing and… love! It is nothing short of a miracle. I am so proud of you and in awe of you and grateful, for your thorough research and fierce leadership. I hope to be a similar kind of guide/mother/advocate, as I continue to educate myself. You’re freeing people, with the INFORMATION, and by living it all, by your beautiful example. Thank you, Taylor! 👑 💐
I am a bit speechless here... 🥹 Thank you so much for taking the time to share this with me. I think I might print this out and keep it on my desk for the tough days. I so appreciate you!
@@MomontheSpectrum ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Yes 100% agree here. :)
Well said!
01:21 - #ActuallyAutistic
01:40 - Alexithymia
01:56 - Allistic
02:04 - ARFID (Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder)
02:37 - AUDHD
02:49 - Autistic Inertia
03:17 - Burnout
03:55 - Coke Bottle Effect
04:32 - CPTSD (Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)
05:11 - Delayed Processing
05:39 - Demand Avoidance
06:05 - Double Empathy
06:58 - Dyspraxia
07:18 - Echolalia
07:39 - Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome
08:12 - Empath
08:55 - Executive Dysfunction
09:20 - Fawning
10:00 - Hyperfocus
10:12 - Infodumping
10:27 - Interoception
10:43 - Internalized Ableism
11:07 - Masking
11:31 - Meltdown
11:52 - Misdiagnosis
12:26 - Nervous System Regulation
12:48 - Neurological Difference
12:57 - Neurodivergent
13:10 - Paradoxical Effects
13:39 - Proprioception
13:51 - Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria
14:14 - Selective / Situational Mutism
14:31 - Sensitive vs. Responsive
15:03 - Sensory Overwhelm / Overstimulation
15:13 - Sensory Processing
15:23 - Special Interests
15:39 - Spoon Theory
16:00 - Stimming
16:11 - Uneven Productivity
16:51 - Unmasking
You're the best ♥️
Voice
Thank you! This is very helpful 😄∞
Thank you!!!!!
Thank you for doing this!
I spent so much time thinking my inertia was from my ADHD before I had my autism diagnosis.
"Am I ever going to know who I am" just hits so hard! I was diagnosed at 42, I'm 46 now, and everything I know about Autism I have taught myself (or learned from people like you!) Nobody is teaching adults how to deal with this stuff, especially in MY area, I can't even find a therapist with actual training in Autism. I feel like I've been masking for so long, putting forward the face other people want to see, that I don't know who I am at all anymore. Good to know others feel the same way - it's less lonely that way.
Another one is 'Shutdowns'. Shutdowns are similar to meltdowns, they are caused by the same things. However, shutdowns include being unable to communicate (verbal shutdown), unable to think, holding your emotions in instead of letting them out, crying etc. They are basically less severe versions of meltdowns and more severe versions of panic attacks. When I shutdown, I often lose my ability to speak. It's very important to be able to tell meltdowns and shutdowns apart! /gen
16:00 - Stimming - I bought an electronic drum kit and OOOOH MYYYY GAAAWWDDD...... I get to hit things with ALL my limbs, move around alot and there are PATTERNS! It's literally the greatest thing in the world for me right now...
Newly self diagnosed female with autism. Your videos help me so much! Thank you for doing what you do! ❤
You're so welcome! Thank you for the comment and welcome to the community.
I'm a male who is on the spectrum but according to the laws of social media I shouldn't be because ONLY FEMALES are allowed to be diagnosed with any illness/injury or disorder of any kind. I'm SO SICK of seeing females on social media presenting the negative stereotype that EVERY SINGLE ILLNESS OR CHRONIC CONDITION known to humanity is exclusive to the female gender when this is not truly the case.
"You don't know.your own strength." HOW MANY TIMES have I heard that ??? I use so much FORCE !!! OMG !!! I'm the polar opposite of lacking muscle tone. I throw my whole body into things and it feels good.
I don’t normally comment on videos but I stopped dead in my tracks when you said Ehlers-Danlos. If anyone would have seen me, they probably would have thought I saw a ghost. I recently was diagnosed with a close genetic defect cousin of Ehlers Danlos, called Loyes Dietz. It is also a connective tissue disorder and causes hyper mobility, amongst other things. All of a sudden, you flipped my world. The journey of wondering if I’m autistic came to a close. That helps me soooo much with my advocacy for my daughter to have my mind completely settled. Thank you x100!
Thanks for putting out these resources. as a late (self) diagnosed autistic, one of the things i struggle with is the 'lost' 50 years of my life. Hopefully, with resources like these, fewer people will have to deal with this heartache as they can find out they are autistic and adapt to it at a much younger age. (and I was misdiagnosed as not autistic 10 to 15 years ago ... which makes me really angry and sad)
Thank you for sharing your experience here. I know what it feels like to grieve those "lost" years...
irlens syndrome, POTS, MCAS, mixed connective tissue disease. Dr. Mel Houser in Vermont at All Brains Belong just put out a resource for autistic people and our health challenges.
Thanks for the suggestions!
5ha k you for your helping 🎉❤
I had to hug myself and rock back and forth to make it through this video. I very rarely do that.
Hey, thank you so much for this! Definitions and descriptions that are relatable are absolutely critical when seeking help. I literally cannot overemphasize the importance of knowing which terms to use.
Unfortunately, we live in a world of "tell me what you need, otherwise I can't help you", instead of "talk to me about your difficulties, and I will help you compare those to the resources we offer". I have literally given up on professional help because I don't know how to communicate what I need with the correct terms.
Yes this! I'm going to screen shot this and put it in the list of things that could markedly improve in the world ❤❤❤ Maybe with any luck I'll be able to scratch out as positively contributing to at least one of them off the list. ❤❤❤❤
Thank you for this. It's such a good point that reading it has made me realise how being AutiHD has played a role in my difficulties getting support for my other (more obvious / visible) impairments down the years.
Fawning 1000%! Internalized ableism 100% as well! also hypermobility and being an empath Thank you so much for all those terms!!!
You're so welcome! Glad they are helpful to you.
I was diagnosed with PDD-NOS in my 20s and mostly ignored it because I was unaware of how Autism worked at the time. Until my friend noticed I was I jumped into the rabbit hole
Thanks for sharing! PDD-NOS would be another great addition to the list... I'm thinking of doing a part 2 so I'm glad you shared this.
@@MomontheSpectrummy diagnosis is the very same one as theirs said with respect and kindness 🙂 I got my diagnosis at around 4 years old..
That was in the 90's but in Australia the specialists had less understanding of autism and knowledge of it back then
Same here.
I OWN being sensitive, and I stopped doubting my intuition. Its saved my life several times. When people are asking Whats wrong with you, why are you so hyper (bosses love it, lol), why do you speak so fast, why do you cry so easily, how come you can't plan things out, why are you so disorganized, why are you so naive, why do you test high in intelligence but get f's in math (my bugaboo subject), why do you talk so much, overshare, and you KNOW youre not this and that dx (abusive mother thought she could dx me-arrogance-SHE had me pegged as bipolar, and I know I'm not), then you start searching deeply. The lightbulb moment for discovering being autistic opened up a whole world.
I was officially diagnosed with PDD-NOS at age 19 but before that, I was diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome at 17 and before that, when I was a toddler, I was diagnosed with Severe Autism, Severe Mental Retardation (now known as Intellectual Disability) and Speech Delay.
Really helpful, thanks Tay. CPTSD is an official diagnosis in the ICD 11, which is the international version of the DSM produced by the WHO. I would also add Monotropism and person first/identity first language.
Monotropism is a great suggestion! I wanted to include it this time around but it didn't make the first cut... very interested in studying this term further!
Being a male empath is the big thing that kept me from seriously considering autism as an option to explain my experience. I knew I had a lot of oddities that lined up with autism and sensory processing issues, but as soon as I learned that hyper-empathy can actually be part of the whole package everything clicked. No official diagnosis yet (just exploring this possibility in the last couple of weeks). Thanks for all the info!
You’re welcome! Thanks for the comment. Would be super interesting to hear more from the perspective of a male empath!
@@MomontheSpectrum heh. It’s been a journey in accepting that society’s definition of masculinity is bollocks 😁 A lot of “more easy to relate to women” where emotional sensitivity is more accepted. Mild gender dysphoria in teens/young adult, though eventually came to the conclusion that I am quite happy with being male, other people’s expectations are just a bit misguided at times (to be kind…). Difficulty in figuring out when/if it’s appropriate to address things other people are obviously feeling.
It’s actually helpful knowing that other people are upset before they may realize it as it gives me time to prepare mentally for the eventual confrontation. It’s overwhelming for sure to feel everybody all the time, but it gives me a way to maybe help people or mention things to other people who could help better. Many cases of “hey Mindy, Margaret looks like they could use someone right now. Would you be willing to go check in with them?”
It means I’m rarely surprised by people (even if I don’t know how to respond well to the situation) and have been able to become a “safe” person for a number of people over my life.
Kinda rambly, but there’s some thoughts.
EDS girly that’s newly realizing she’s autistic as well - THANK YOU for including that linkage! Both diagnoses are incredibly hard to come by and there are SO many people out there caught at the crossroads/likely unsure why they feel like they’re struggling so much. I hope advocating for the comorbidity helps folks live with grace. Also - chronic pain and overstimulation?? It’s a nightmare combo; zebras with a touch of the ‘tism are badass and deserve to be seen as such 🔥
There’s a lot of terms that I didn’t know. Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria is one that is pretty accurate for me because I sometimes have trouble accepting criticism and I believe that my form of stimming is talking to myself.
Newly self diagnosed autistic female. I find this list really helpful! Thank you!
You're very welcome! Thank you for your comment.
I'm 66, have been on a 30+ year journey to find out who I really am. Four years ago I began writing a memoir, and as I was putting together some vivid memories of childhood I was like, holy crap, I bet I have asperger's. Now I'm learning more about the spectrum and am considering getting a professional assessment. I don't so much need medication, but strategies for becoming more my true self are much needed. I appreciate your page and this video in particular. :-)
Autistic inertia.....I was soooooo hard on myself with this. I just called myself lazy, or unmotivated. It took getting hurt seriously (mean person), to give myself permission to rest when tired.
Having language to describe my life experiences has been a game changer! Definitely saving this video! 💞
💓
Yeah, I don’t think I had any of these words three months ago. Sure, I’ve caught up, but only because of three months of special interest research mode.
Thank you for creating this channel. I'm 25 and just now realising that I could be autistic. I have now persued a diagnosis and have been referred for an assessment, and I'm doing all the research I can to see if I resonate with anything that explains me more to present to the psychologist. This was soooooo useful to put myself into words. Xx
Thank you for this glossary/dictionary! I will revisit many times. I like to rewatch your videos when I'm having feelings (big feels). One of your early ones you talked about grieving as part of the process of a late diagnosis. I really appreciate the acknowledgment of that stage. I think my grief is more of the "who am I really" strain at this moment. So the Unmasking course is perfect for me right now!!! Working my way through it at my own pace...which I love. Watched all the videos, read all the info, and now I'm going back to work in detail. Cannot say enough about the helpfulness!!!
So glad to hear this! Thank you so much for the feedback.
Lisa may I please use the last part of your comment as a testimony about the course on my website? I can publish it anonymously.
@@MomontheSpectrum yes absolutely! I’d be honored!!!!
I'd be honored!!! Yes, absolutely. And feel free to use my name.@@MomontheSpectrum
W, Wall-walking or walking close to buildings, sometimes happens when I have to go outside and i didn't plan to and I'm thrown into the task vs transitioning into it.
Z, zoning out. Different from transitioning or blank staring but more like when the brain stops racing from subject to random memory but just sitting there "being" not as intentional as mindfulness but if that helps you "picture it" ...oh and
P Punctuation lol because of the (parentheses to further explain, the quotes to give clarity, and proper use of !,?etc)
Thanks for the suggestions!
Great video! Uneven productivity and the spiky profile go together. We can very much confuse others (and ourselves) by our varying ability levels, depending on so many variables discussed in this video.
Thank you for all this clarity!! I have many signs of neurodivergence and many on the lists of ASD, but I don’t want to dishonor those who actually have been diagnosed by self-diagnosing. Hearing your definitions and many stories you have shared in other videos has shed light on many parts of my life that have never made sense. Even if I do not get an ASD diagnosis, you have helped me greatly to understand and have compassion on myself for being different and not able to keep up with others’ expectations. I’m just starting to notice my own needs, how much I’ve ignored them over the decades, how that has led to too many meltdowns and burnouts and confused friends and family. I can’t imagine not masking, and know it will still come in handy sometimes, but I’m looking forward to the relief of letting down my guard in safe places and learning how to rest and recover. Thank you for the inspiration and invitation to get to know the real me, and find joy and wonder in the way I’m made!!
in the book Unmasking Autism, the author goes to great length validating self-diagnosis. If you strongly relate to the ASD definitions, your assessment of yourself is totally valid, and as I have come to understand, valued also in the autistic community. You are not taking anything away from us professionally diagnosed by seeing yourself as autistic. Your feelings are valid
I can’t even begin to describe how grateful I am for the information that you provide & the insight into my own self that you have made possible. I’m 43, and a few months down the neurodivergent rabbit hole, but I’ve found some of myself again through your work. When I say I feel like you’re saving my life a little at a time, I truly mean it. I’m inspired by you. Thank you for all you are doing!!!
Even after watching yours and others' videos on ASD to understand my daughter's diagnosis, then my own, this video showed me that there's still so much I don't know, even after going into research mode on autism for the past few months - your videos are always so well researched and informative, and your delivery is wonderfully articulate and engaging. Thank you for everything you do.
Hey Taylor, YES, YES, YES! Autism and empathic abilities, or more to the point, ESP, or extra-sensory perception, go hand in hand. In other words, it is the physiological difference between autistic and holistic brains, which gives the fully developed autistic brains, abilities. The "experts" try to say that ESP abilities are not real or possible, but that is rubbish. It is real, and, in my humble opinion, is what causes things such as, exhaustion after social situations, and "mind blindness", or as I call it, "spatial distraction "
Also, I just realized, after you mentioned your son, that the little boy in the opening of the movie, 'Mimic', directed by Giullermo Del Toro, who mimics the sound of the creature with spoons, is autistic. You can easily CZcams this particular scene if interested.
I acknowledge my problems with Autistic Inertia, Burnout, Delayed Processing, Demand Avoidance, Dyspraxia, Echolalia, Executive Dysfunction, Fawning (especially when it came to my ex), Hyperfocus, Infodumping (have learned to curtail it a bit as an adult), Internalized Ableism, Masking (but not as much lately), Meltdowns, Proprioception, Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, Situational Mutism (at least when it comes to situations that cause high anxiety), Sensory Overwhelm, and Uneven Productivity.
Wow Taylor! This was a truly brilliant video, I have watched a few times over. What an amazingly useful video. I love how much thought and effort you put in to the stuff you create, it really shows. You are doing a fantastic job helping so many people. Thank you so much ❤🎉
Thank you for saying this. I haven't put a video out in a while and I was down on myself because a lot of others creators put stuff out weekly, but I've been taking a lot of time on this because I wanted it to be really meaningful. Thank you for sharing this with me it means a lot.
I think you make absolutely fantastic videos for newly diagnosed individuals. This seems like a difficult video to make because they're not all medical terms or found in the dictionary and therefor their definitions are debatable and often personal. There were a few things that I really wanted to add to/give feedback on,
Alexithmia is not only having trouble putting words to emotions but also (and/or) being aware of having them at all/identifying how you're feeling even before having to put words to those feelings.
Autistic burnout, specifically, is not the same as as an allistic person's burnout. That is not to say either is less/more serious than the other, but they are two very different experiences in very different brains that come from different places, and I think it's important to differentiate between the two. (You did describe an autistic burnout but didn't refer to it as an autistic burnout, and I'm annoying like that)
I think, when talking about executive dysfunction, it's important to mention that it is the task-starting driving force of the brain, to the point where it can make you physically lose control over your body when attempting to "go do something" or even move a muscle, which absolutely destroys lives, and there is a truly impressive amount of ableism surrounding it and has autistic people ending up in very abusive situations with ignorant allistics. I understand that this video had to be condensed in some manner but I don't think we can afford not to address that.
Tbh my definition of a meltdown is literally a completely different thing from your definition. But I have the same problem with how other autistic people describe shutdowns, this sometimes feels invalidating to my very extreme experiences with autistic catatonia but I suppose it's very individual and I wouldn't want to invalidate others so we should probably just stick to the idea that people experience these things differently and there isn't a set definition.
My most important missing terms are shutdowns, auditory processing disorder, and sensory processing disorder. Though you did mention sensory overwhelm and (delayed) processing, SPD and APD are legitimate conditions of their own that are huge part of autism, and people should know about them so they can advocate for themselves.
Edit: reading comments and realizing this video indeed also did not address functioning labels and learning disabilities.
Thanks for the feedback!
Shared with sister 65, I'm 58. It's Cliff's Notes key for Neurodivergence for Dummies. Rock On
I think this is going to be a video that I am going to be watching and re-watching again and again!! Thank you Taylor, you are an inspiration for me in my journey of discovering my auDHD, my husband's auDHD and my two teens 19 and 18 (in 4 days). We had no idea and now we are discovering a language and coping skills and a deeper understanding of not only ourselves but each other. We give each other a lot more grace now we are starting to understand why we feel and behave the way we do and not feel shame over it.
YES!!! That's what I love to hear. Always give yourself and others as much grace as possible! So glad to hear you're learning vocabulary to better support yourselves. Thanks for sharing.
that is wholesome to hear (that u can work together on it).
You did some really impressive work putting this together.
I personally would like to see the medical community do more research to diagnosis those with less physical symptoms (ie Aspies) sooner. I'd also like to see neurologists and psychiatry development a guide to use as apposed to one for mental health.
Just my typed out thoughts.
Thanks for sharing!
Auditory Processing Disorder, Sensory Processing Disorder, Dyscalculia, Vasovagal Syncope, and one that may seem odd, but important- Boundaries.
(...i know there's more!)
This video is very helpful, thank you. I'm very glad that there are Closed Captions options for Deaf & Hard of Hearing & Auditory Processing Disorder & the like.
Thank you for this feedback! I appreciate your time.
EDS runs in my family.
I also believe I’m an empath, as well as many other things you mentioned…
Same here
Fawning is used to get through the over attention we get from bullies in order not to be bullied , I think. It sounds like what I had to learn to do.
add in dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia
Great suggestions! Thank you.
@@MomontheSpectrum
And NVLD, too. Even though NVLD isn't yet an official DSM diagnosis, it is an important phenotype. I have both ASD and NVLD.
So I actually was recommended for an autism evaluation after an EDS diagnosis. My symptoms of ADHD are similar enough to Autism they think it might be a combination and it was only figured out because I was finally diagnosed with EDS. I had to seek out a world leading doctor on the disease to get a diagnosis because when I was getting diagnosed only about 10 years ago it was unheard of and never talked about. I'm finding a lot more primary care physicians familiar with it now. It's great that your brought it up in your video.
For the double empathy bit - my thoughts on this are that Non Autistic people can tell what others are feeling, unless the other person is Autistic. Then they can't read the person's facial expression and know them instantly, so maybe they don't trust them or fear them.
This is a great video that will be super helpful for anyone getting up to speed with the lingo. Thank you once again for the content!
You're very welcome!
Hyperfocus - acquiring ME/CFS has put a concrete end to that.
Fawning. As you talk about this on the video, I'm like... she's describing me.
Moment of revelation. I just deconstructed my life.
Bullied, so you try to be normal, you try to become someone else, you try to show that you're a good little boy, force a smile, aren't I just such a nice person? Defense mechanism. Not that it works, the bullying doesn't stop, but you give it your best, and it becomes ingrained, baked into your persona. William? Yeah, that guy who's so nice, so pleasant, so polite, always smiles when he says hello.
I just realized that I'm really crying out in terror: "Please don't bully me".
Just seeing it face to face exposes the Wizard as the little man behind the curtain. No, that's not me, it never was.
Thank you, so much, for sharing & caring so deeply for the neurodivergent community ❤
you are very welcome. it is truly my pleasure and I am grateful every day to do what I do!
Thank you for Your channel...now at 32, self diagnosed everything make so much sense in my life and what has been going on for whole of my life...i feel tremendous new space and new energy in me...Thanks again for making these videos, these are life changing and helps a lot. Thank You one more time 💚💚💚
Pausing mid video to check the goblin thing was an excellent choice, and holy cow this thing is so freaking cool
I've had Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome for a while and had no idea that there was a connection with Autism! Newly diagnosed at the very late age of 56, after my kids, both on the spectrum, kept telling me that I definitely was also on the spectrum! Thank you for all the great information. :)
It's funny, never made the connection with EDS, CPTSD, and being an empath to autism before. Just realized this year that I'm autistic and I'm still stunned. Thank you for being one of the resources I've found that clicks well with me!
Thank you Taylor, this is a wonderful video and a perfect description of how we are, see things, do things and have to operate in order to get through the day.
Yep. Just had trouble with a coworker and couldn't even explain why or voice my problem. Just walked away. Can't wait to hear from the managers.
You're a literal Goddess for these vocabulary words and definitions!
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
😇😇😇 glad they are helpful!
Nah, I'm not autistic...........holy crap that list is my LIFE !!!!
I liked this. I like solid facts and not just stories of experiences. I am working towards getting a diagnosis myself (professionaly), which is probably both autism and adhd. I am sure I'm high masking too because gosh knows my family didn't want anything to reflect badly on them. I also hated all the diasnosis that keep getting thrown at me. Like their hoping for something to stick.
Im rambling. Sorry. Thanks for the video.
This is a video that I will have to keep coming back to over and over again. Very informative and had multiple aha moments for me. Now I'm about to do what I always do and that is to excessively research. I just can't stop being me. 😅😅
Thank you so much Taylor, recently diagnosed AUDHD I have been soaking up a lot of info about it, and apparently, there is still a lot I need to figure out, and it does help! There is so little info for adults, it is disconcerting! But thanks to youtubers like you, we can get helpful information and support!
thank you so much for these videos - they are so helpful on my journey to understanding myself. the misdiagnosis is real - I gifted-kid’ed and masked my way through school, spiraled downward in college, and burnt out so hard in early adulthood I had to seek treatment. I was diagnosed with GAD/ED at 25, it was refined to OCD at 29, and got my ADHD diagnosis a year ago at 30.
the only one I ever felt like actually fit my lived experience was ADHD. on the outside, a lot of the things I do look like OCD behaviors, but I never connected to the way other diagnosed OCD folks described their internal experience at all. learning the ASD terms “perseveration” and “IS (insistence of sameness)” was like a lightbulb going off - finally, an explanation that perfectly captures what I’m doing AND how I’m feeling internally when it’s happening! and explains all my extreme sensory issues that doctors just point to ADHD about! and the communication issues in my relationship because of my rejection sensitivity! and how I take everything literally, and struggle with ambiguity, and sequencing, and on and on!
it’s honestly exhilarating to realize I’m not broken. my therapist and psychiatrist are supporting me in referring me to a psychologist to get the formal evaluation/diagnosis next week. it’s scary, but exciting. I’m very thankful for you and other AFAB folks on the spectrum for sharing your experience.
So glad you're here! Thank you for your comment.
I noticed on reddit r/ADHD the following very enlightening comment from an auto-moderator when someone mentioned "hyperfocus". I have read books on flow state and I had associated it with hyperfocus, but I had never heard of "perseveration." I find the distinction rather interesting.
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"Hyperfocus" is a very poorly-defined word that, in the context of ADHD, generally refers to two superficially similar -- but fundamentally different -- mental states: flow and perseveration.
Flow is a positive, beneficial state of deep immersion and high engagement in a task or activity, and is also usually accompanied by enjoyment of the task/activity. It's something almost all people are capable of, and specifically is not a benefit imparted by ADHD.
Perseveration, on the other hand, is part of the ADHD disorder. It is the inability to switch between tasks or mental activities. It's that thing that makes you spend 10 hours doing something non-stop even when you know you need to stop and do something else.
This is very helpful!
Thank you for your part in Changing the world
❣️
Holy cow! This is an impressively clear and organized list- just how we like it!😁 It must have taken significant time and effort to compile and simplify everything so well. *Thank you* for this resource!
I’ve thought it plenty of times before, but I don’t know if I’ve ever said it out loud: You’re a talented educator; thanks for sharing all your hard work!😊
P.S. You are rockin’ the summer vibe right now! *LOVE* the hair!!
HI BOXLEY BOX. 😄👋 Thank you for all of the lovely encouragement. 💓
Dysgraphia is a term i discovered not long ago but has really help me understand stuff, though I have not been diagnosed with ASD or Dysgraphia I have both, Dysgraphia effects writing spelling and even grammer and can effect fine motor skills, writing for amounts of time causes discomfort in the wrist and fingers, it is not super common in the ASD community but common enough I think to be looked into.. but it has really helped me understand why I have such bad hand writing and can't draw a stright line, mix upper and lower case letters in words and letters are different sizes when I write... thanks.. love your videos!!
First…huge Thank you for this comprehensive list. May have added VESTIBULAR, TIME BLINDNESS, DYSGRAPHIA, SENSORY DIET, OBJECT PERMANANCE, BODY DOUBLING
So many of these hit hard but that paradoxical effects, I wish more psychiatrists knew about this and used it as the start to a search for and autism diagnosis especially in women.
"Say what you mean so that I may understand you. Mean what you say so that I may trust you." - Like... I get why people dance around things and aren't up front with how they feel, but sometimes people are honest but i have never been good at telling the difference of when its 'appropriate' to be honest and when its not. I learned early on that when someone asks a question, they don't actually want the answer, they want you to tell them that whatever they think is correct. Its exhausting, why start a conversation on something if you're not actually interested in the topic? I mean i guess i do kind of know why people do that.... its because people are afraid of what others think about them. I'm always worried people are mad or upset with me. And i think the fear comes from not being able to instinctively tell. So if I can't tell, i fear the worst :(
Wow, a few of these were huge new "clicks" with me, following on the continual flood of discoveries and realizations since my ASD epiphany in March. Funny enough, two of them came across simultaneously, that is when you got to Uneven Productivity AND your aside that you failed to really register it when you first heard it because of delayed processing. Ironically enough, when you brought up Delayed Processing in the list, it didn't really click with me, but when you described how it worked when somebody first mentioned Uneven Productivity to you, then, well, wow, BOTH categories took together off in my "recognition department" like blazing fireworks. It was, "Oh, THAT! Yes, THAT I do all the time!" And until now I never linked it (like a million other things) to ASD. I know PRECISELY what it feels like when the info/sensory input has maxed out, your cognition is just like a rubber wall that will simply repel anything else trying to get in, you know that sounds are being made, ostensible information is coming your way, you're politely nodding your head but there is simply no possible engagement left. And then, hours later, maybe days later, you re-hear something somebody said and think, "Wait, that was brilliant! Why on earth was I...'immune" to that, like it was nothing more than the clop-clop of shoes in a hallway and not intelligent human contribution--what's WRONG with me?!" And then of course you feel like a heel for "dissing" somebody. It's awful. So when you got to Uneven Productivity and put Delayed Processing in a context I immediately grasped, all the lights went on. And then there's Uneven Productivity. Fireworks again. Until now I had not connected this bane of my existence to my ASD. The revelations just keep coming. The other HUGE click was Austistic Inertia. Dear God but the sheer cascade of things that are making sense at my ripe old age. How many times have I parked the car, at home, at a supermarket, at work, at a rest stop on a long trip, in the church parking lot, and just frozen, feeling utterly unable to cope with the shift from the one mode to the next.... And then by the same token there's the driving inertia that works the other way, when I'm passionately engrossed in a creative interest and the very concept of stopping, whether to eat, go to the bathroom, go to sleep, go to WORK, is as alien and repellent as the idea to, say, stop breathing, or to start sticking needles in my eyes--like, why would I DO that? But of course reality brutally breaks in and you DO have to go to sleep, go to the bathroom, go to work, eat at least SOMETHING eventually. But it's really tough. It will be less tough now that I understand where it's coming from and why.
Very helpful, thank you! I am going to the preliminary screening in the process to be diagnosed for ASD and ADHD and I am afraid that I forget to mention most of the synptoms that I have because they have become so invisible to me during the decades of masking. I need to make a list!
check out my video over the DSM-5 criteria for an autism diagnosis. If you go through the list and write up personal examples for each to give to the person doing your eval, it can help you get the validation you are looking for! czcams.com/video/PPY8_3a-aj8/video.html
My mom doesn't want to accept my autism diagnosis.
I was diagnosed about 6 months ago, at 29 (woman).
It has been so hard and painful knowing that she never believed in my great sensitivity to certain sounds. And she gets angry if I want to tell her about my autism, or if I want to explain my difficulties to her. He always says that I can't use autism as an excuse, and that I have to treat myself.
I never used autism as an excuse. It's an explanation. I'm really sad, but I'm going to give up talking to her about my autism for now. Today I live with my fiance. I feel safe and accepted by him.
Thank you, this video is such an important resource for me as a very recently diagnosed 38 yo
Terms to consider including:
DSM
Dysgraphia
GABA
Great information & thanks for this audio-visual dictionary!
i have just been diagnosed 1 month away from my 64th birthday. your content is educational to me. thank you. I am slowly unmasking but you can imagine if you had 30 more years to mask and burnout and the A to Z of all carnage of undiagnosed Autism in females brings. Even now I am struggling to leave the house at times so I am searching for CBT with an Autism trained therapist as the local NHS couldn’t help me. Neurodivergent CBT therapy I have had several times over the years was trying to tell a mule it is a horse ! Thank you so much for your channel. I am going to read and study every bit of it. Best wishes and God bless 🇬🇧🤓🌈
Thanks so much Kim! Glad to have you as part of the community here.
OMG!!!! The Goblin tool tip. Thank you so much! I didn't even realize I had an issue until I used this tool! This is amazing!
I'm at 9:18 and need to take a break. The EDS thing rea;lly really got me, because my joint pain was apparent to me by the age of 3 but, like the ASD and ADHD, it was entirely igtnored in favour of "She's just attention seeking/loud/spoiled." Not getting basic medical care... SUPER spoiled. And when I approached a GP in my 20s to suggest EDS and ask for a referral to look into it, that doctor looked me dead in the eyes and said "Never say that to another doctor ever again" It's the best description I can find for my hypermobility and joint pain, and I've been doing research for over 20 years now, but this physician told me to never even MENTION to possibility to another doctor. Not only is that medically abusive, it's completely illogical and discriminatory. Because of my delayed processing, I just sat there, shocked.
I still don't have an EDS diagnosis, or ANY diagnosis relating to this issue, even though I've been in pain 24 hours a day for years and it started 30 years ago. But no, I should NEVER mention this to another doctor EVER AGAIN. Because they might... what, explode?
FFS. So yeah, massively triggered, gonna go do something else for a while.
BUT I LOVE THIS VIDEO!!! THANK YOU TAYLOR!!!! I SHALL RETURN!
Yup I have ME and POTS which are clearly the same bs family, and LOADS of my friends have ME and/or EDS... and I'm like y'know what... we're all a little bit on the spectrum, aren't we?! That's why we're friends!
Oh and the side of my family that has history of post-infection neuro autoimmune disease inc. ME is the side I'm SURE I get the ASD from too lol.
Hope you're ok and really glad all this is being better recognised Xx
Thank you for sharing this and I'm so sorry to hear about the invalidation and awful things you've experienced. I hope you continue to find ways to support yourself and get the care you deserve.
This video is very lovely, thank you for taking the time to make this. However, PLEASE refrain from saying autism is a difference and not a disorder. For the majority of people on the spectrum, it disrupts daily life enough for the disorder part to be a very big reality. For me, it's also severely disabling. It's not a difference for me, it is a very persistent disorder that negatively impacts me daily, and when people say it's not a disorder or not a disability it really makes me upset.
Single best Autism video I have found !!
Connecting things: Sensory processing issues include increased or decreased perception. Decreased sense of force or orientation in space shows as dyspraxia. Increased sense of empathy shows as empath. Increased perception of mechanical food properties or taste shows as ARFID. Different signs and names, same root cause. The perception may also vary aka "but you ate this before and it was fine!", which can be confusing.
Never heard of demand avoidance before but it fits me perfectly! I never heard about that when I got my diagnosis so I thought that was just me.
yep this term made so many experiences click into place for me!
the comment about eds is so interesting. I don't have EDS but I was diagnosed with hyper-mobility and my skin is indeed quite translucent (cause it's just really fair, i guess) and i tend to get bruised easily, even when I don't remember any incident causing the bruising. never thought it can be related to neurological issues.
Hello, I'd like to share a nice experience I had on a festival, where I help out at with orga and things... There was a really, really emotionally moving concert, which overwhelmed me a bit (crying), so I went away from there. I could regulate myself fine without having a melt down, but when I told another orga later about it, they said: "Oh, it's also things like this, what the Awareness-Team is there for! If you manage, go talk to them!"....which I did, later on. And they were amazing :) I told them about my neurodivergence, and...lol... they even praised me for having been able to remove myself from that situation and regulate myself again, and they very friendly asked, what I would need in case of said "melt down", because they were a bit insecure about this. So I said: "Preferably a low stimulus environment!" And they were all like: "Gotcha."
It took some courage to approach them, but I might have made this festival even more of a safe space, not just for me. Yay! :D
This video was very helpful to me in both understanding my daughter who recently diagnosed at age 18 and myself (just diagnosed at 48)! Also, thank you for mentioning sitting in the car before going into the grocery store. 😁I do that all the time and now it makes a bit more sense.
I’m enjoying your videos and learning a lot from them. Thank you and keep up the great work!
Had a good cry after this video.
I just want you to know that all your hard work is VERY much appreciated. Even if the logistics don’t reflect it properly, you are making an impact. 💖
Best wishes from Kansas 🌻
Thank you so much!!
So helpful. Ty Taylor for your continued diligence and attention on this subject. The list broken down is super helpful as well. 🙏💖🙏
Moving to a new environment from WA to AZ & NM has helped me learn how to be myself and then after several months of that I found my GF that I’ve been with for almost a year. It feels as though that when searching for a partner it is vital, but not necessarily required, to find another neurodivergent individual to have that in common with. Everything else can be the same as neurotypicals finding their partners I.e. Common Interests, Physical / Emotional attraction, etc.
Needs ?? I don't know.them, I just know when I'm in distress and it's already too late. I'm trying to learn and manage better.
7:00 Handwriting and similar drawing activities. Woodworking.
I wish there was an alternative word for course because every time I hear it feel like a high pressure stressful demand and I’m automatically repulsed 😭😭
Your channel is so helpful! I was just diagnosed this week at 32.
Aces Taylor. Aces. Thank you so much for this.
You're very welcome 🙏
It's just remarkable how well you people with autism and ADHD understand me.
Great list, I have something to add to it though. Misophonia. I learned this recently from I'm Autistic, Now What? s channel. For my whole life I could not shake the feeling of disgust and anger primarily over eating sounds (there are others, but this was the biggest trigger), so much sometimes that I had to physically remove myself before reacting outwardly.
Knowing this term has helped me immensely because I realize it's a diagnosed condition and I am not the only Misophonic person out there, hopefully it helps someone else too. Keep up the good work.
Just to throw this in here:
There’s a term I prefer to use that’s very similar to your “double empathy”.
It’s “inter-subjectivity” or “intersubjectivity”
One I would add is Prosopagnosia - Faceblindness. It seems more common among autists than allists at least. Ones I talked to who had it, were also autistic.
Another, even more important: Shutdown. Maybe not nice sounding, but neither is Meltdown and fitting as it is the opposite. Same origin, but instead of leashing out, you get completly mute or even dissociative, depending how strong the trigger was. It seems most autists have a tendency to one more than the other or even exclusively. But it can also be in the difference of how the overload happened. Sudden loud noised or a constant annoying noise is garantueed a shutdown for me. While something not working or me making a mistake tends more to meltdown or both.
Hey Taylor, I've loved your channel since stumbling across it and can imagine it's been such an amazing resource for so many others with ASD. I've recently received my diagnosis, which has been a cathartic experience. I've decided to be open with family and friends about it and have met with varying responses. Most seem accepting, but are usually accompanied by tag along comments like "you don't seem it at all" and "it's just a mental thing you'll have to get over." I was wondering if you have done a video or know of one that articulates what the "mental thing" is to my friends and family so they can better understand the struggle I've felt for so long. Thanks!
Hi! Thanks so much for your comment. Here are some videos that might help...
Meltdowns 101 for Family and Friends czcams.com/video/eUjrOBvtZLU/video.htmlsi=kMNGBMf4ig-3a9Z_
Sensitive vs. responsive: czcams.com/video/axewF2hrcJY/video.htmlsi=Yxeu-wGMtmgGoi7z
How to support autistic people: czcams.com/video/6k4W6NZQRpE/video.htmlsi=hZcZjZDE8EWWppsE
But you don't look autistic: czcams.com/video/lTqNTwDv3lk/video.htmlsi=9ZD5X5XrBsDXwEfk
Hope these help!
This list is excellent. Another term for this list is "interoception".
I hadn't heard of the goblin tools before so thank you! Because that's just amazing.
Fawning - I started doing this early on in my life because i wanted people to like me. It caused people to take advantage of me.
Autism Inertia: WOW I had no idea there was a word for this experience! I great struggling waking up each morning and from naps. Not because I am tired, but the transition is hard. At work when I'm working hard at something and I get my hyper focus on and am asked to switch tasks. It drives me nuts! This paired with executive dysfunction. I spend HOURS on the daily glued to my couch. I want so badly to do anything. But making the switch is HARD!!
Thank you for this educational video!!
So glad this term was helpful for you like it was for me! I go into more detail on this topic in this video: czcams.com/video/UmRVTHiJ4-8/video.html