My Fiancé Wants Me To Sign A Prenup

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  • čas pƙidĂĄn 18. 02. 2022
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Komentáƙe • 723

  • @nolimitation7350
    @nolimitation7350 Pƙed 2 lety +82

    Another option that Dave doesn't mention is, she can sign a life estate. She gets to live there for the remaining of her life, but the property goes to the kids when she pass.

    • @heff434
      @heff434 Pƙed 5 měsĂ­ci +3

      My thoughts exactly

    • @joeylee9809
      @joeylee9809 Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci +3

      This option sounds pretty good to me, I believe the kids are not living in that house with them and they are living somewhere else, as soon as the wife passes away then the house goes to the kids.

    • @cbtam4333
      @cbtam4333 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +1

      Good compromise.

    • @suebotchie4167
      @suebotchie4167 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +2

      Life estate? Make sure it's a good one. Make sure she doesn't lose her rights to live there, because she spent 30 days in the hospital.

    • @laurao8099
      @laurao8099 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +1

      That sounds like a good idea at first but it seems like there could be a lot of loopholes and ways for the kids to mistreat the wife obviously there's no way for us to know if that would happen but doesn't mean the kids will like her and respect her as the years go on especially after he passes away

  • @fhuber7507
    @fhuber7507 Pƙed 2 lety +250

    After one divorce, any man who does not get a pre-nup is a fool.

    • @FaintAura
      @FaintAura Pƙed 2 lety +27

      Any man who gets married in the West is a fool.

    • @Ernster86
      @Ernster86 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      @@FaintAura What do you mean? Most women appreciate their man, are loyal and will stick with you unil you die? LOOOL...

    • @Gingy2002
      @Gingy2002 Pƙed 2 lety +13

      Women should definitely do this too. So many women are making bank and not thinking about these things smh

    • @kagnewcobra5228
      @kagnewcobra5228 Pƙed 2 lety +11

      @@Ernster86 Most? More than 50% . Doubt the veracity of that.

    • @littleripper312
      @littleripper312 Pƙed 2 lety +5

      Any man or woman*

  • @Patriotintexas
    @Patriotintexas Pƙed 2 lety +219

    My experience: my fathers (deceased) wife took EVERYTHING. Left me, the only descendant, absolutely nothing. Don't take chances. My story is not unique.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +22

      That’s happened to my dad’s lady friend. Father’s new wife took everything, leaving his children nothing. If you die first, there’s a good possibility your children will be disinherited.

    • @Excalibur2
      @Excalibur2 Pƙed 2 lety +20

      Happened to my grandparents, home ended up going to unrelated people and nothing went to the kids

    • @guyrose2350
      @guyrose2350 Pƙed 2 lety +12

      Yep happened to a good friend of mine, dad set up funds so they could buy a house and for college funds with a few hundred thousands each, he’s still alive but she made him spend it on holidays for her and wiped them all clean!

    • @DavidRamseyIII
      @DavidRamseyIII Pƙed 2 lety +7

      Why were you entitled to anything? She should have got everything

    • @guyrose2350
      @guyrose2350 Pƙed 2 lety +9

      @@DavidRamseyIII most parents want their kids to get something, parents don’t put money extra money away for the after life, often it’s to help family to move forward and build their lives after the death. Most step parents marry and also care for the children (in childhood and adulthood) in this case, usually that also means the step parent would help if they are able too. Nobody is entitled to anybodies money, but that is usually how it goes, it’s easier with biological parents staying together, as many step parents only play a parenting roll until their partner dies, which is disgusting in itself, I would be so hurt if my step mother did that to me.

  • @TheNORegretShow
    @TheNORegretShow Pƙed 2 lety +215

    People who say people shouldn't get married if they ask for a prenuptial agreement have nothing to lose. If you have built an empire by yourself, love is not worth losing half of everything. Some people have motives that you will never see until it happens, and it's too late. Always protect your assets.

    • @Argedis
      @Argedis Pƙed 2 lety +6

      Just look at what happened to people like Robin Williams or Branden Fraser. It's heartbreaking.

    • @justme87999
      @justme87999 Pƙed 2 lety +13

      Often times more than half. I really dont understand why people get married anymore. Too much to risk for 17.5% chance of happiness.

    • @kagnewcobra5228
      @kagnewcobra5228 Pƙed 2 lety +9

      Always, always protect yourself and your assets first. The wisest comment I've read so far! Male or female.

    • @dimediamond
      @dimediamond Pƙed 2 lety +6

      This is very very very very true. You never fully know people's intentions down the road. Be careful.

    • @MooMoo69556
      @MooMoo69556 Pƙed 2 lety +4

      You don’t understand the biblical definition of love then. Therefore you’re wrong. đŸ€·đŸœâ€â™‚ïž

  • @sk.n.9302
    @sk.n.9302 Pƙed 2 lety +35

    My Dad gave my stepmother the house (she had no children) thinking that upon her passing, it would go back to us, but to our surprise (despite a good relationship) she left the house to her sister!

    • @FabriceLabako
      @FabriceLabako Pƙed 6 měsĂ­ci

      That's a good one 😂

    • @chetmyers7041
      @chetmyers7041 Pƙed 3 měsĂ­ci +2

      "Understandings" need to be spelled out in legal documents. Promises and memories can get fuzzy with time.

    • @JudePi-jx7yo
      @JudePi-jx7yo Pƙed měsĂ­cem +1

      Of course. Our's promised us (when everyone was shocked after 2 years together she got the house) the attached farmland to the house she got. That lasted less than 18 months and she sold it. She decided she deserved it. Never worked again after 40.

    • @FilthyMcNasty69
      @FilthyMcNasty69 Pƙed 25 dny

      What an idiot

  • @FabienneSP
    @FabienneSP Pƙed 2 lety +12

    My parents have had to sign a prenup, my grandmother insisted. It came in handy when my father had to declare bankruptcy but the business was in my mothers name. They are married this year 50 years.

  • @kirkraszman7998
    @kirkraszman7998 Pƙed 2 lety +141

    Easy answer. Don't get remarried. This has disaster written all over it.

    • @John3.36
      @John3.36 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      This is exactly what the Bible teaches, but no one listens.

    • @JDAfrica
      @JDAfrica Pƙed 2 lety +2

      I got married - only way out is in a box. Would never get remarried, had a bad experience once

    • @lauvonfr9222
      @lauvonfr9222 Pƙed 2 lety

      Right, sounds like a hot mess!đŸ”„đŸ”„

    • @suebotchie4167
      @suebotchie4167 Pƙed měsĂ­cem

      @@John3.36 yep no wiggle room around that one.

    • @suebotchie4167
      @suebotchie4167 Pƙed měsĂ­cem +1

      @@John3.36 oh forgot to add, neither does the Word give any slack concerning s3x outside of marriage between one man and one woman. Any wonder the heathen rage.

  • @KSCzap360
    @KSCzap360 Pƙed 2 lety +54

    Always protect your children. She has no right to the property. If she wants a property than they need to buy one on their income together.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +10

      💯 Without the house he didn’t buy, and with only what they can purchase together, he may become less attractive as a spouse. 😆

    • @cm5394
      @cm5394 Pƙed 2 lety +3

      They’re adults

    • @bobbyb7672
      @bobbyb7672 Pƙed 2 lety

      Exactly!

    • @salaciousBastard
      @salaciousBastard Pƙed 3 měsĂ­ci

      @@genxx2724 _"💯 Without the house he didn’t buy, and with only what they can purchase together, he may become less attractive as a spouse. 😆"_
      If that's the case, then the front door leading her to her car in the driveway should be the sexiest thing in the room to a man with a brain.

  • @andiclemenza6476
    @andiclemenza6476 Pƙed 2 lety +275

    I love Dave’s idea: get a new house for them, do a prenup for the old house and let his kids deal with it when they are grown up. Please stop bringing past relationship’s pain to the new ones đŸ˜©đŸ˜©đŸ˜©đŸ˜©

    • @stevenporter863
      @stevenporter863 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      That is playing games. Defeats the whole point of the prenup. I wouldn't be surprised if he calls BS.

    • @patriciabradford1304
      @patriciabradford1304 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      I like this idea too. But can't he just make a will and give them that house in it. Is the prenup necessary if its just the house.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      @@patriciabradford1304 A Will requires Probate,
      best to title the house so it just changes ownership.
      The house is Titled Unmarried man, sole and separate property (got from parents)
      $175 change the Title to a Beneficiary Title
      (Transfer upon death).

    • @johnSmith-uz8nl
      @johnSmith-uz8nl Pƙed 2 lety +6

      Do you think they have money to pay property tax, insurance, heating for two homes? Dave failed big time on this one.

    • @andiclemenza6476
      @andiclemenza6476 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@patriciabradford1304 i think she said she didn’t want the Will part because then she would have spent her money in a house that in the long run would belong to his kids and not partially to her.

  • @David-wo9un
    @David-wo9un Pƙed 2 lety +31

    Why get married at this point? He is a fool.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      SSA survivor benefits,
      Retirement medical
      ease of asset distribution upon death

    • @anthonywebster8638
      @anthonywebster8638 Pƙed 2 lety +12

      @@aolvaar8792 in other words, all benefits for the woman.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@anthonywebster8638
      ????? No
      She could be the one with the governmental job that pays retirement family healthcare,
      He might not have SSA or lower, self-employed and not making contribution.
      Asset distribution goes both ways.

    • @clarifyingquestions
      @clarifyingquestions Pƙed 2 lety +2

      More like she is the fool to marry him.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@clarifyingquestions House rent is $3K/mo in my hood.
      "Free rent"

  • @JasonCarmichael
    @JasonCarmichael Pƙed 2 lety +59

    "Life Estate"
    The kids will get the house, the wife has the house until her death.

    • @robertbarron7017
      @robertbarron7017 Pƙed 2 lety +9

      YUP!!! My solution as well.

    • @mikkibates7854
      @mikkibates7854 Pƙed 2 lety +3

      WITH life insurance, in case she needs ot move into another home, or eventually assisted care.

    • @JasonCarmichael
      @JasonCarmichael Pƙed 2 lety

      @@Matthias_Fischer that is what a "life estate deed" is.

    • @trexxy9628
      @trexxy9628 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Yes! A beneficiary or TOD deed to the kids, life estate with limited powers to the wife

    • @pilotboy3328
      @pilotboy3328 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      I agree with giving the wife a life estate. Simple and inexpensive.

  • @elizlom
    @elizlom Pƙed 2 lety +8

    That happened to my very elderly aunt, step kids kicked her out as soon as the husband died to sell the house, she had nothing. A very bad situation.

  • @yhckelly
    @yhckelly Pƙed 2 lety +122

    I have seen this with very valuable farms. A widow and a widower in their 70s decide to marry, one side is poor and the other side is very wealthy. Suddenly, because of an elderly marriage, family farms are broken up. It creates huge, huge amounts of resentment and distress. Because of the previous marriages, a prenup should be signed and the house should go to the kids. It's nobody's fault, but making clean lines in messy situations and alleviates a lot of resentment in the long run.

    • @joycejudd5109
      @joycejudd5109 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      in your scenario, give the property to the children and start your new life in a new home. Personally, I would never sign - or ask someone else - to sign a prenup. You either trust, or you don't.

    • @johnSmith-uz8nl
      @johnSmith-uz8nl Pƙed 2 lety

      This happens with big and small estates.

    • @mkirules
      @mkirules Pƙed 2 lety +4

      @@joycejudd5109 I say prenups are only needed in situations with kids from previous marriages. That is a different situation that marrying the first time. First marriages I think are never needed.

    • @justinfitzgerald6581
      @justinfitzgerald6581 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      You should not have another wife if you can’t love your children more, of course they matter more that women can come and go wherever she wants your kids can’t.

    • @chetmyers7041
      @chetmyers7041 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@joycejudd5109 If your suggestion is "give the property to the kids today," then you have never been burdened with the task of preserving wealth and have a poor understanding of taxes and estate planning.

  • @defman85
    @defman85 Pƙed 2 lety +7

    Prenup. Chances of divorce are too high and the inheritance should stay with the family.

  • @1HandME
    @1HandME Pƙed 2 lety +27

    The will can be set up so that once he dies, she can live in the house for the rest of her life. When she dies, the house goes to the kids, back to his family.

    • @skincareceo
      @skincareceo Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Then the kids can pay property taxes on it.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      That may be many decades. They could be old before they receive their family home.

    • @raallen1468
      @raallen1468 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@skincareceo Property taxes & paying for ALL maintenance & replacement of ALL appliances, furnace, ac, roof, etc etc etc.

    • @Ryan_Woods7
      @Ryan_Woods7 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @J Mark Evans This is the way.

    • @1HandME
      @1HandME Pƙed 2 lety +2

      Actually according to the law, the wife has to pay property taxes, and for utilities and bills while she lives there.

  • @brad885
    @brad885 Pƙed 2 lety +58

    I could see if it was your second property. I agree with Dave-rent, sell, or give it to the children now.

    • @stevenporter863
      @stevenporter863 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Me too. If it is a second property, yes. As it stands, no.

    • @SSS-wo2hn
      @SSS-wo2hn Pƙed rokem +1

      đŸ€ŠđŸœâ€â™‚ïž. She seems like she is looking for the come up he needs tođŸƒđŸŸđŸƒđŸŸ.

  • @Charismafire
    @Charismafire Pƙed 2 lety +62

    He should give the house to the kids now and move on with his life with his wife.

    • @angelg3642
      @angelg3642 Pƙed 2 lety +3

      Yeah bro, just up a HOUSE like its not worth anything (especially in 2022)

    • @joycew.6531
      @joycew.6531 Pƙed 2 lety

      Yup

    • @obiflex
      @obiflex Pƙed 2 lety +6

      If he gives up all his assets then the woman will disappear instantly. She's just marrying his property but he's too dum.b to know it

    • @andrew8168
      @andrew8168 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@obiflex exactly.

    • @JohnDoe-gc1kt
      @JohnDoe-gc1kt Pƙed 2 lety

      @@obiflex actually he isn't hence the prenup

  • @stareagle5000
    @stareagle5000 Pƙed 2 lety +17

    Answer is simple. Property goes into a trust, the trust allows her to remain in the property and have control of the property but not sell it as long as she is alive if her husband passes on before her, but reverts to his children once she dies.
    This is literally the type of situation that trusts were made for. The whole “fortress” protecting your asserts from liability scenario you hear about with the Uber wealthy is just a byproduct of their existence not what they were invented for.

    • @JustinCase780
      @JustinCase780 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      She's only 45 years old for f'n sake. The guy wants the kids to have the house and Papa Dave gave the answer.

    • @sk.n.9302
      @sk.n.9302 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      This is a very good approach. Because my Dad oversaw this detail, when my stepmother passed, the family home & business went to her sister! We were all shocked.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@sk.n.9302 That’s the worst. Overlooked, not oversaw. Overseeing means supervising. What was the detail that wasn’t handled properly?

    • @sk.n.9302
      @sk.n.9302 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@genxx2724 Sorry, I grew up having to speak three languages & sometimes things get garbled. My Dad should have added a “clause” in his Will stating stepmom has the “use” the house & a generous monthly income, but when she would pass, it would all revert back to the family. This clause was ommitted, and her sister got everything. Apparently, this happens often.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@sk.n.9302 I’m sorry that happened. Why don’t people THINK??? Why didn’t his attorney discuss his intentions and draft the document accordingly?

  • @shawmeck9323
    @shawmeck9323 Pƙed 2 lety +14

    The gentleman just has to outlive her, problem solved.😂

    • @alp.9672
      @alp.9672 Pƙed 2 lety

      Yea why is she assuming she won’t die before him?

    • @a.h.2667
      @a.h.2667 Pƙed 2 lety +4

      Statistically women live longer and he's 10 years older.

  • @evanserickson
    @evanserickson Pƙed 2 lety +107

    Always do the prenup. Iron out custody arrangements and how to split assets before a divorce. That way lawyers don’t get any money. In a regular divorce, the man gets a third (or less), the woman gets a third, and the lawyers get a third. They pit you against each other to try to keep the case going so that they make more on fees.

    • @MultiMates7
      @MultiMates7 Pƙed 2 lety +5

      They can still go to court even with a prenup you can dispute prenups if they were signed a long time ago and just say I dont feel the same way.

    • @evanserickson
      @evanserickson Pƙed 2 lety +9

      @@MultiMates7 They can, but any lawyer worth his salt can defend a prenup. Especially if it is fair.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety

      How is the house Titled, Unmarried man. sole and separate property

    • @wbae1340
      @wbae1340 Pƙed 2 lety +5

      This is so sad that it’s something you would have to consider before marrying somebody. Doesn’t seem like you should be getting married in the first place

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +4

      @@wbae1340 You can stick your head in the sand and decline consider it all you want because you’re too pious for that. The fact remains, that’s what happens.

  • @fsmoura
    @fsmoura Pƙed 2 lety +40

    _"Dear Dave, my future ex-husband has been burned in the past and now he's all jumpy, wary, and cautious, therefore making the process of my acquisition of his assets substantially harder than it needs to be. Please advise."_

  • @joshuathompson4162
    @joshuathompson4162 Pƙed 2 lety +12

    Prenuptial agreements are for divorce not death.

  • @SasSaga
    @SasSaga Pƙed 2 lety +2

    I walked through the exact situation. It causes RESENTMENT. Do not sign this. It will never be your home


  • @rosariabirrane2373
    @rosariabirrane2373 Pƙed 2 lety +4

    The question is, her being 45, is she not bringing anything in this union? Or does she only want security for her old age from this man? She should already own a house of her own...

  • @teresajasoo2853
    @teresajasoo2853 Pƙed 2 lety +3

    I am not a millionaire, but I have a pre nup because the inheritance of my father left us belongs to our family not to our significant other, is very clear between us, what ever we built together is together and we can decided what to do with it. So i do not disagree with a pre nup.

  • @dancebrittany23
    @dancebrittany23 Pƙed 2 lety +4

    You don't see many questions on this channel that really stump Dave. This was a GREAT question!

  • @2005papillon
    @2005papillon Pƙed 2 lety +37

    There is a setup where she is allowed to live in the home for the duration of her life. She has to maintain the house and pay the taxes. But when she passes, or if she remarries, the house becomes the property of the children.

    • @racpatrice
      @racpatrice Pƙed 2 lety +1

      That's a good idea! I also thought about what if stepmom and dad have a child but I suppose they can just create an account so that the new baby would get money or stocks instead of the property.

    • @sharalli3112
      @sharalli3112 Pƙed 2 lety +7

      Life estate. My thoughts exactly.

    • @2005papillon
      @2005papillon Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@sharalli3112 Thank you. I forgot the legal terminology.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      Life estate. That was my first thought. But if the kids have a sentimental attachment to the house, one of them might want to live in it and raise their children there, and not have to wait until she’s gone. Giving her a life estate defeats the purpose of keeping the house in the family. That’s why I suggested Ed Slott’s idea of life insurance for her. If he dies, she moves out and uses the insurance to get another place and supplement Social Security.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      Life estate also allows her to rent it out. I don’t think that’s the intention here.

  • @melissal7984
    @melissal7984 Pƙed 2 lety +6

    I really like Dave's answer to this awkward situation

  • @kristinam2719
    @kristinam2719 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +1

    She doesn’t say if she has kids, but why not let her live in the house for her lifetime? Then when she passes, the property can go to the kids.

  • @olstar18
    @olstar18 Pƙed 2 lety +14

    Strangely enough I've heard of more issues with the second wife causing problems with inheritance. Like one guy I used to work with told about the issues they had with his fathers second wife. When his father passed away they read the will and there were several trusts he had setup for his kids that had all been drained the day after the man passed away. There were also references to jewelery and heirlooms that were supposed to go to specific kids that all disapeared including his wedding ring which she had destroyed so the jewel could be put into a ring for herself. They couldn't do anything about it because no one had the money to get a lawyer.

  • @mikewright2858
    @mikewright2858 Pƙed 2 lety +2

    Agree that if SHE outlives him, she has to leave the property to the kids? I wouldn't sign something that kicks me out of my home if my spouse dies.

  • @davidlkleinman
    @davidlkleinman Pƙed 2 lety +7

    Leave the property to her without the ability to sell and it goes to his kids upon her death. She said she understood his view. This solves both issues. She lives in the house until she dies or chooses to leave. Then the kids get it.

  • @216trixie
    @216trixie Pƙed 2 lety +48

    So glad to hear this. I'm in a similar situation although not married yet. My girlfriend and I are in our 50s and 60s. I inherited a house and I'd like to leave it to my kids as it is most of the wealth they might get from me. But you're right what does my future wife do if I die and she needs a place to live what does she do all this time having no ownership in the house? Good question! I have a lot to think about. Separate house for us sounds like the way to go.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      Place the house in a Trust.
      when she dies the trustee can dispose of the trust. Simple

    • @John3.36
      @John3.36 Pƙed 2 lety +11

      Leave it to your wife. Let the kids take care of themselves, they are adults now.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Pƙed 2 lety +4

      @@John3.36 You inherit a multi-million $ house,
      And put a beneficiary deed on it for the wife.
      Can you say Target.

    • @John3.36
      @John3.36 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@aolvaar8792 Target

    • @travisbrueckner4457
      @travisbrueckner4457 Pƙed 2 lety +6

      Put it in the will that she can live their until she passes, if you pass first.she can't sell the place, but gets to stay their the same way she always would. It a simple solution

  • @Outrageousconduct
    @Outrageousconduct Pƙed 2 lety +6

    I'd run as fast as I can

  • @lischatham7771
    @lischatham7771 Pƙed 11 dny

    My mom did this. The home my father built is not going to her new husband. My sister rents it and they got a new one.

  • @kathyhaynes6818
    @kathyhaynes6818 Pƙed 2 lety +60

    Only my kids will reap the rewards from my hard work. I've met too many people who are not serious about saving money or being debt free like I have. It seems fair to me that you have the right to pass what is yours, through hard work and/or inheritance, to your own kids. Expect a lot of drama otherwise. If the other person doesn't understand that, they can move on.

    • @DavidRamseyIII
      @DavidRamseyIII Pƙed 2 lety +10

      Good luck finding a partner desperate enough to put up with that insane line of thinking

    • @daffydlwellen1270
      @daffydlwellen1270 Pƙed 2 lety +10

      So, nothing for the new wife, even if she contributes to the upgrade of the property?
      Having someone give you something for nothing is not a great idea

    • @davidleavitt3804
      @davidleavitt3804 Pƙed 2 lety +7

      @@daffydlwellen1270 then she doesn't need to contribute.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +4

      @@davidleavitt3804 I’d agree with that. She contributes nothing to the house, and leaves when he dies. That’s not much of a way to live, though.

    • @obiflex
      @obiflex Pƙed 2 lety +3

      I wish most men can reason like this. Dave is setting men up for failure, he can't tell this to women, they won't even let him finish the sentence

  • @HisLove4You
    @HisLove4You Pƙed 2 lety +15

    If they want to stay: A trust! Indicating that if he passes the house goes to her for the remainder of her life ( life estate), and to his children upon her death.

  • @mysterio1570
    @mysterio1570 Pƙed 2 lety +3

    Good one Dave. The Past is arguing with the Future.

  • @yesno8204
    @yesno8204 Pƙed 2 lety

    I have seen this happen a few times. It reminds me of those old homes you would sometimes come across as it become empty and nobody lives there - so it just stand there rotting away. I always thought why this phenomenon would happen. Now I have a better understanding...

  • @karimbennett5651
    @karimbennett5651 Pƙed 2 lety +8

    I agree with Dave. Buy another home that can be theirs and, ultimately hers. Rent out the house he wants to go to the kids.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Tenants won’t take good care of it. The house the kids receive will bear no resemblance to the house they grew up in. Every sentimental detail will be destroyed..

    • @SSS-wo2hn
      @SSS-wo2hn Pƙed rokem

      Yeah that way she can pay half on the mortgage, insurance, taxes, upgrades etc etc.

  • @HXCORNERSTONE
    @HXCORNERSTONE Pƙed 2 lety +13

    Statistically women leave relationships more so, I don’t blame him at all.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      I think men instigate it.

  • @astrea79
    @astrea79 Pƙed 2 lety +5

    As long as both parties have their own lawyers to look over the prenup agreement, there's nothing wrong with it.

  • @patty109109
    @patty109109 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Good advice from dave today!

  • @upgradednigga
    @upgradednigga Pƙed 2 lety +23

    Sounds like she wants a piece of the house as well

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      If she lives in it and her earnings, efforts, and taste contribute to the upkeep and improvements over the years, I understand her feelings. But something has to be worked out so the house goes to the kids.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      @Prey R Exactly. And the kids shouldn’t have to wait until her death, which could be 50 years from now, to take possession and enjoy their family home.

  • @johnkelley5654
    @johnkelley5654 Pƙed 2 lety +10

    Just have the house go to the kids when she dies. She gets to stay in the house and the house still stays in the family.

    • @jacobhinsey
      @jacobhinsey Pƙed 2 lety +5

      This is a terrible suggestion
      Who pays the property taxes in this arrangement? Who covers the cost of future repairs? The person who squats there with no future equity in the home or the person who owns it but can’t use it?
      Imagine inheriting a house that someone else lives in and you may never have access to use or sell. He is in his 50’s and she is in her 40’s so it’s not unreasonable the children are in their 30’s. She may outlive the children

    • @karimbennett5651
      @karimbennett5651 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      I think she needs to be up and out of that house upon her husband’s death. Why make the kids wait around for, possibly, decades after he’s gone?

    • @skincareceo
      @skincareceo Pƙed 2 lety

      And I assume they pay the property taxes and any upkeep then?

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@karimbennett5651 💯

  • @kiraharris919
    @kiraharris919 Pƙed rokem +1

    Why not just put the house in a trust with directions that she gets to keep it and live in it for the remainder of her life and then it goes to his kids once they're both gone? Takes care of her, the house, and the kids

  • @janstolk486
    @janstolk486 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    she wants a reward for divorcing him !

  • @charliedallachie3539
    @charliedallachie3539 Pƙed 2 lety +7

    A prenup is the smart move but .. most frown upon it lol 😂

    • @perotal
      @perotal Pƙed 2 lety +5

      "Women frown upon it"
      There, fixed it for you

    • @fluffyduffyasmr3861
      @fluffyduffyasmr3861 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@perotal wrong.

    • @joecooper8527
      @joecooper8527 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@fluffyduffyasmr3861 No most of the time it's women.

  • @randomutubr222
    @randomutubr222 Pƙed 2 lety +5

    I’m going to push back here: if she loves him, he should understand why he wants to leave the house that is in his name to his children. Ideally, this woman will also come to love his children as well and understand his desire to help them.
    I think some sort of equity share makes the most sense. If she puts in a lot of money along with her husband to improve the value of the house, she should get something out of it when/if this husband dies before her. Essentially the kids can keep the property but buy her out of her equity. Something like that is a fair compromise in my mind.
    I have the same issue. My parents divorced, and my mother kept the house we grew up in and her new husband lives there and has also put a lot of money into improving the house. He has kids too. My brother and I’s general position is “that’s our house
”
    But if I am being realistic, the increased value of that house has a lot to do with the money and work he has put into it. So why shouldn’t his kids get some benefit out of it too?
    I have no idea what their plans in terms of willing away this house. I don’t ask and I don’t care. I care about my mom, not the house. If I get absolutely nothing, then I’ll still live my life just fine. But if his kids are entitled to part of the equity commensurate with what he’s put into it / the value the house has increased from those specific measures, while my brother and I retain the majority of it, then I really don’t have a problem with that. In an ideal world, my parents would have never split and this wouldn’t be an issue. The house would go to me and my brother and that’s the end of it. But we don’t live in an ideal world


  • @MorrisonDavid94
    @MorrisonDavid94 Pƙed 2 lety

    A trust rather than a will and prenup with bylaws stating she can't remove the kids would solve that

  • @derekpascal3749
    @derekpascal3749 Pƙed 2 lety

    The most vital duty of parents is to spoil their children rotten. This woman acts like homelessness is shameful.

  • @Eveningbreeze721
    @Eveningbreeze721 Pƙed 2 lety +7

    My future husband are I are in a similar situation but the opposite. I have the home. We are fixing it up now to rent it out and buying our own. Immediately now though there is a family need for it on my side. He respects this and is actually supportive of it. Interestingly his accountant suggested that HE get a prenup. Meanwhile, this accountant has no idea about my assets yet. Lol

    • @littleripper312
      @littleripper312 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      That's because people are often sexist and still assume that it's always the man who has more money and assets. I've made good money and what annoys me is people assume I didn't make it myself and must have had some husband or boyfriend who bought me things.

    • @SSS-wo2hn
      @SSS-wo2hn Pƙed rokem

      @@littleripper312 because its like that in the MAJORITY of cases. Woman just now are obtaining assets but are holding most the student loan and consumer debt.

  • @GrumblesM4
    @GrumblesM4 Pƙed 2 lety +2

    I agree 100% Dave!!! Make it a rental and move on

  • @grantguy8933
    @grantguy8933 Pƙed 2 lety +2

    How does she know he will pass first?

  • @too-da-loo
    @too-da-loo Pƙed 2 lety +2

    This is easy to solve. On his death she is allowed to continue to live there until she passes or remarries.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Pƙed 2 lety

      So she moves a guy in and doesn’t marry him. His family and friends enjoy the house for decades while the kids drive by, fuming.

  • @Mr_Fairdale
    @Mr_Fairdale Pƙed 2 lety +29

    How does Dave know that the past caller who wanted a prenup for his classic car didn’t want to leave it for his kids? Making assumptions without the proper info. Feels like Dave and Co. take the women’s side as the default correct one, no matter what.

    • @LubosMudrak
      @LubosMudrak Pƙed 2 lety +14

      I also noticed this some time ago. He is good with basic money advice but no one should listen to his advice regarding relationships with women. Times have changed and he obviously did not get an update.

    • @raallen1468
      @raallen1468 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@LubosMudrak Dave is a control freak. I'll bet, he is a peach to live with.
      It's Dave's way or the highway. 😡

    • @boston312
      @boston312 Pƙed 2 lety +3

      Dave should never advise men to get married in this day and age. No event will destroy a man's life more than modern marriage

    • @AllynHin
      @AllynHin Pƙed 2 lety

      Dave knows because he took the call and that was discussed. The guy wanted the prenup because he was afraid if his marriage ended in divorce that the wife would want the car. He loved the car so much he didn't want to lose it.

    • @Mr_Fairdale
      @Mr_Fairdale Pƙed 2 lety

      @@AllynHin no. The woman called in. We never heard the man’s side of the story.

  • @the_truth21
    @the_truth21 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Why get insurance on your new car? You’re already setting up your self for a car accident if you buy car insurance.

  • @helenecable7846
    @helenecable7846 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Very good answer

  • @elitefitness341
    @elitefitness341 Pƙed rokem

    How about this? Prenup stating if he dies first, she can remain in the house until her death as well, at which time it goes to the children. OR, in the event of his death, the house is sold and profit is split between her and the children.

  • @pmw3839
    @pmw3839 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci

    The property should be hers for as long as she lives, but then be passed to his kids.

  • @synelpt2927
    @synelpt2927 Pƙed rokem +1

    What about living a will that she can live there until she dies, and then after she passes, it can go to the kids?

  • @fcosta94
    @fcosta94 Pƙed 19 dny

    I feel that if the man solely owns the property, he should be the only one to maintain the property with his own money. But I agree with Dave’s suggestion to buy a new property together and rent out the other property. Another option could be that the woman could buy a property and rent it out as her own.

  • @Paull71937
    @Paull71937 Pƙed 2 lety +5

    Unless you plan on leaving sign it

    • @JBCookies8885
      @JBCookies8885 Pƙed 2 lety

      Not true. If he dies before her, she will be made homeless. She could put in thousands of dollars into the house and it wouldn't matter. His kids could evict her and she would only have what she could grab before they changed the locks. It would be easy for them to claim all the furniture too. Too risky. I wouldn't sign it.
      Of course, I have heard of prenups that allow the spouse to live out the rest of their days there. And only after the spouse's death will the kids get it. She's not made homeless. His kids get the house. Everyone wins.

  • @sarahburggraf907
    @sarahburggraf907 Pƙed 2 lety

    Dave's laugh at the end sounded like the count from Sesame Street

  • @jaehwan123
    @jaehwan123 Pƙed 2 lety

    Great answer.

  • @takeitback-financial2808
    @takeitback-financial2808 Pƙed 2 lety +2

    I’m curious of how her relationship is to the kids.
    Seems like they may need a provision on the proceeds going to the children on the sale of the home, but it can’t be sold without her permission or passing.

  • @marshall2.015
    @marshall2.015 Pƙed 2 lety +9

    She's going to live there for free until her husband dies. That might give her 40 years to save to buy anything she wants. What's the problem? If she doesn't want to live there, then get married and buy a house together like everyone else does.

    • @Draega007
      @Draega007 Pƙed 2 lety +7

      She seems pretty sure that he's dying first. That right there seems like a red flag to me lol.

    • @ErwinSchrodinger64
      @ErwinSchrodinger64 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      That's what I immediately concluded, as well. It's the entitlement here that is beyond absurd.

    • @marshall2.015
      @marshall2.015 Pƙed 2 lety +7

      @@Draega007 she's doing inventory of it all before the marriage, scary.

    • @Draega007
      @Draega007 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      @@marshall2.015 yea it seems highly suspicious that she's already planning a life without her future husband. Kinda scary to be honest. I mean I know we can go at anytime but to be planning before the marriage has even happened is a little wild to me.

    • @Itsdjsigi
      @Itsdjsigi Pƙed 2 lety

      The problem is you're blind and aren't seeing the bigger picture lol

  • @AbileneRN
    @AbileneRN Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I'm a new widow. Dave is spot on.

  • @teresah.6696
    @teresah.6696 Pƙed 3 měsĂ­ci +1

    If he dies before her, he doesn't want her to remarry and have another man living there.

    • @suebotchie4167
      @suebotchie4167 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +1

      Don't understand how a widow could stand having the sort of man who doesn't have the motivation to own his own house. Guys like that, probably just as lame in the bedroom.

  • @richricogranada9647
    @richricogranada9647 Pƙed 2 lety +8

    A couple should be married for at least 10 years to be illegible for 50% rights, in case of a divorce.

  • @rosspimental8384
    @rosspimental8384 Pƙed 2 lety +7

    Poor advice. She can get a life estate in the property meaning she has right to occupy after his death and until hers but has no right to transfer, sell, encumber, or leave the property for anyone else. Her estate can also be credited for improvements to the property that were made during her lifetime/with her funds. Some states automatically make this legal assumption in these type of situations but it’s best to have a wills and estates attorney draft a will and prenuptial agreement.

  • @bones549
    @bones549 Pƙed 2 lety +9

    ....forsaking all others. My wife and I said that 37 years ago. I'm with Dave on this one. Sad today marriage has become a bus partnership.

    • @bones549
      @bones549 Pƙed 2 lety

      @Joshua Bailey sad Outlook on life son. Bless your heart.

  • @DavidRamseyIII
    @DavidRamseyIII Pƙed 2 lety +2

    I got mega rich off a business young and married a broke uni student. I cannot imagine the damage that would have been done trying to keep things seperate with a prenup. Yuck

  • @suebotchie4167
    @suebotchie4167 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +1

    Unless you are prepared to put your spouse as your number one earthly priority, stay the heck single.

    • @whatevergoesforme5129
      @whatevergoesforme5129 Pƙed 2 dny

      They're both divorced right? The first spouse is the one referred to in the bible because God hates divorce but nowadays, divorce is so common even among Christians that what you say no longer holds true. Did they put the first spouse as their number one priority? Why did they get divorced?

    • @suebotchie4167
      @suebotchie4167 Pƙed 2 dny

      @@whatevergoesforme5129 big difference between pew-sitters and Christians - the sitters are way greater in number than the for-real remnant.

  • @RJRussoVids
    @RJRussoVids Pƙed 2 lety +25

    They’re not even married yet and she’s already thinking about her inheritance from the guy’s wealth. See what’s going on there?

    • @sariah2425
      @sariah2425 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      You have to sign before you get married so why wouldn’t she think about it

    • @Price8903
      @Price8903 Pƙed 2 lety +4

      It sounds like he brought it up to her first, by saying this house that we’re going to live in is going to my kids; so if I die first sorry not sorry

  • @rositagocoo1932
    @rositagocoo1932 Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci +1

    If the agreement is fair and reasonable the. Sign it if its unfair then dont sign it

  • @agriope2334
    @agriope2334 Pƙed rokem +1

    In Agatha Christie's books, if the dad died, the stepmother would get to live there for the rest of her life, and upon her death, the kids would then inherit it. Don't know if that is a real-life thing though.

  • @mikevera9867
    @mikevera9867 Pƙed 2 lety +24

    Here's the solution: DO NOT GET MARRIED!!!

    • @Charlie-gv3zt
      @Charlie-gv3zt Pƙed 2 lety +5

      Yes!

    • @Price8903
      @Price8903 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      đŸ€ŁđŸ˜‚

    • @blackworldtraveler3711
      @blackworldtraveler3711 Pƙed 2 lety +5

      Yeah. I have a girlfriend with her own wealth and I have mine.
      Not getting married.
      No issues.
      This woman apparently has nothing of her own and want security at all costs being over 45.

    • @Eveningbreeze721
      @Eveningbreeze721 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      People aren't going to stop getting married.

    • @djpuplex
      @djpuplex Pƙed 2 lety

      Best solution of all keeps everyone non best behavior.

  • @bobdadruma
    @bobdadruma Pƙed rokem +1

    Simple, don't get Married.

  • @pepsiccolausa8857
    @pepsiccolausa8857 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

    A prenup also forces out the truth on both sides. No two people are going to agree on everything but the prenup will help

  • @irislaw2277
    @irislaw2277 Pƙed 2 lety

    Why can't it be written that the house to go to the kids once they both are dead? So when the husband dies, it's still her home until she died and then the kids get it.

  • @mynameisbetty1767
    @mynameisbetty1767 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    If you need a prenup then she ain’t the one lol

  • @rebeccaramirez-
    @rebeccaramirez- Pƙed 2 lety

    Right on point

  • @kathymimms5545
    @kathymimms5545 Pƙed 2 lety

    My husband and I are going through same situation. Usufruct in Louisiana. We both have a will with a usufruct inserted.

  • @djpuplex
    @djpuplex Pƙed 2 lety +5

    A prenup is better than nothing however they are thrown out all the time. If she doesn't sign they don't get married full stop.

  • @mlovespring7892
    @mlovespring7892 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Dave made a good point. I wouldn't want to live in a home that he shared with his ex.

  • @jamaicaninthekitchen4358
    @jamaicaninthekitchen4358 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    So who is the wife a stranger .Don't marry him or buy your own house and rent it out to pay the mortgage.

  • @bovinebeautymoo2884
    @bovinebeautymoo2884 Pƙed 2 lety

    A Document can be drawn up based on years of Marriage, and also assets based the home and the Land it sets on. This CAN be done and done so ALL is on the same page. Have a talk first with a Lawyer, then have a Family meeting and how things will work based on Legal Documents and the Wills. This may not stop any bad feelings but there will NEVER be a Question of what their Father/Mother wanted done when they pass.

  • @cassandracasteel4085
    @cassandracasteel4085 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    My grandmother 3rd husband wanted it to go to his kids. What they did was if he died first she had a life lease then the kids got it after her death

  • @andytaylor1588
    @andytaylor1588 Pƙed 2 lety +11

    "...to thee all worldy good I give..." is a great part of a marriage vow. Why marry someone you don't love above all others? Give the house to the kids before you get married and have a fresh home together. Do not marry someone who will not invest everything into the marriage. I personally would (if necessary) make a written agreement with my fiancee that the kids get the house after we BOTH pass on.

    • @Jim_Curtis
      @Jim_Curtis Pƙed 2 lety +1

      You would not be saying that if you have been on the other side of a divorce. It does not matter nowadays whether a woman is christian or not, they all act similar in divorce because the laws in family court heavily favor them without a valid prenup. Just doing a written agreement will not hold up in court and if he passed first, she could end up fighting with his kids over assets. And by gifting the house while he's alive, he screws himself over with gift tax to pay, no step up in cost basis on the house and higher tax bill for his kids if it later gets sold. Great idea dude!

    • @obiflex
      @obiflex Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Marriage vows are worthless and completely useless

    • @Jim_Curtis
      @Jim_Curtis Pƙed 2 lety

      @@obiflex Yeah they are only for feeling good at the ceremony. No marriage vows in family court

  • @briankowald6465
    @briankowald6465 Pƙed 2 lety

    Sounds like it should go to her if he dies, but when she dies, it goes to his children. If she has kids, then it would not go to them.

  • @nhgriff1
    @nhgriff1 Pƙed 2 lety

    When my dad died, we had to buy back my parents's property from my stepmother - property that was inherited from my mother's side of the family!

  • @bobbyb7672
    @bobbyb7672 Pƙed 2 lety

    He better Run! đŸƒđŸżâ€â™‚ïžđŸƒđŸżâ€â™‚ïžđŸƒđŸżâ€â™‚ïž

  • @lindathomas8080
    @lindathomas8080 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I had a friend that she would stay in the house after he passed until she passed then it went to his kids

  • @JD-vv2qp
    @JD-vv2qp Pƙed 2 lety

    Depends on the laws where they are, but this is where trusts can be very useful

  • @skincareceo
    @skincareceo Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Sounds like they don't need to be married.

  • @Crew4Life
    @Crew4Life Pƙed 2 lety +6

    The man is right!!!.. But I also understand her point. They shouldn't get married

  • @augustinerubio2004
    @augustinerubio2004 Pƙed 2 lety +11

    There's absolutely no benefit for him to get married at that age.

    • @jrwntctv8091
      @jrwntctv8091 Pƙed 2 lety +5

      There is absolutely no benefit to marriage at all. For anyone.

    • @greggpurviance7252
      @greggpurviance7252 Pƙed 2 lety +3

      Yes there is

    • @m.c.8877
      @m.c.8877 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@jrwntctv8091 yes and to not be living together than or be in an intimate physical relationship if no marriage. Pre- nups and wills protect people.

  • @rogersanchez9635
    @rogersanchez9635 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci

    Nothing guarantees her to live longer than him

  • @Colombia20102018
    @Colombia20102018 Pƙed 2 lety +3

    I will put the house on the kids name now to avoid any schinanigans later.