La Bise vs The Hug I Who Does It Better? France vs USA Cultural Differences
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 1. 07. 2024
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I don't know what you guys think about la bise vs le hug, but i hate to admit when it comes to these different French vs USA cultural greetings, i'm all about the HUG! Today's video dives deep into the differences and similarities between the different greetings and what makes them sometimes awkward and sometimes easy to understand and do! Can't wait to here in the comments what you guys think and which greeting you prefer!
Bisous! Kate â
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I wonder if, at a deeper level, we just love the little "quiprocos" as it lighten the mood
We've been doing the elbow bump thing since COVID and I like it. It won't replace hugging or anything but I'll keep using it since I don't enjoy to be touched.
Super nice video as always.
As a frenchy, "la bise" is indeed super natural and part of my culture. So very natural with close female and male friends and family. But, I also totally get how it can be unconformtable for foreigners.
As I work in an international company, it's definitely handshake with everyone.
When it comes to hugging, on the opposite and maybe because it's pretty unusual, I'm not comfortable with it at all (like your husband).
Finally, I'm in the 2 bises team (not 3 nor 4). Kisses on the chick is only for my beloved kids: I agree with you that this is super not ok in a different situation.
Bises Kate đ
No hug/smashing at all. I am Canadian so we hand shake or hug. But never this body pressing hug that your husband is talking about đ
Yes! Some of these kisses I have had leave my cheeks wet from their lips. Itâs to much. So overwhelming. I feel stressed when I know I have to kiss ppl I donât know. If I had it my way I would just wave and say hey to ppl that are not my friends.
Yes! I'd be quite happy to stick with the handshake in formal situations and a nice wave and friendly smile for less formal situations. I'm not sure even when hugging became a thing in Canada - certainly not till I was an adult. The first time someone hugged me in a social situation wasn't until I was at university and I was so taken aback I couldn't speak for a few seconds. (I think I covered it ok, but oth, my friend didn't try that again for a loooong time haha).
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đđđThis was so funny! I STRONGLY have to contest Robin's description of the hug. I definitely hug the way you described - really just the shoulders. Also, I don't hug friends unless it's been awhile since I've seen them. If I saw them recently I won't do anything except say hi. Like you, I don't think I've ever felt anyone cop a feel during a hug, but I've DEFINITELY had guys linger way too long with their lips on my cheek doing the bise, yuck.
One of my French friends laughs at the way I do the bise -- too aggressive in the head bobs apparently. đ
Iâm AmericanâŠdown south where we are very friendly. If itâs someone we are close to or havenât seen in years, then we hug. Sometimes, we kiss on the cheek but itâs one cheek. If itâs someone weâve never met, we shake hands if the female wants to. GentlemenâŠwait for the lady to put her hand to go out first. If she doesnât, then you donât.
I'm a Frenchman who lives in Belgium, actually in Wallonia, the French-speaking part of Belgium. The Belgian - or at least the Walloons - practice "la bise" even more than the French, except that it's one kiss on one cheek only. Especially among men. Usually in France the cheek kiss between guys is only between men of the family or really close friends. Here in Belgium, you only know someone, man or woman, you start kissing. I remember that, when I started living in Belgium 22 years ago, it was really weird for me to kiss a man that I hardly knew. Now, I'm used to it, when I meet my neighbors it's bonjour with "la bise", including other men; when I go to France I sometimes have to remember that "la bise" to other men is for my cousins and in-laws only (I have no brother).
Correction... "you ONLY know someone"... I mean "you HARDLY know someone"...
Not related to this video but general question: I've recently found your channel and love your content as someone who is planning a move from the US to France. Thanks for what you share! When I try to go to your blog, though, it says it is private. Did it move or get taken down or something?
In the States, I hug hello the people I know, and if I'm being introduced to someone, I will either smile and say hello or give a little wave and say hello. Hand shakes are for business settings. I lived in South America for several years, and the bise is common there, too. You present the right cheek for the kiss. I now live in the south of France, in Montpellier, where not only are there three kisses, they start by presenting the left cheek, which I am slowly getting used to. What I have seen to avoid the two or three kisses dance is to lightly place your hand on the other person's shoulder and basically hold them in place until the greeting is done.
In my country we do "la bise".
I gladly do it with my family and friends, but I don't like it once it comes to large groups or people I don't know very well... Then I'd try a global "hand gesture" to avoid the assle.
Often, people who insist to kiss you or being kissed are the most annoying, because once you start with one you HAVE TO go around and kiss everyone.
I strongly agree with those who say a hug is more intimate than la bise.
For people I'm not AS acquainted with, they sorta get a half hug/side hug. If I'm just meeting you, just a handshake, fist bump or a wave, depending on the circumstance. Good friends and family get full shoulder hugs. My son looms over me, so his hugs are from above and my husband is the only one that gets the full body press. Some friends, if I haven't seen them for a while, they get the rocking hug (lasts longer. Maybe a back pat). My husband does the bro hug with his friend. The hand clapped together then pull in for a one armed hug with an arm in between, keeping any bits from touching. My nieces give me the run up, jump on Auntie with legs, Monkey hug. đ. I'm NOT into kisses from friends and not my immediate family. Kinda grosses me out. It's not la bise, it's big cheek smacks and some people are just too in my face. When I'm in France, it's all la bise!!! Our family exchange student is bise then hugs, because he's family. In England, meeting friends I'd only corresponded with over Facebook and email, I was unsure what to do, but they came running towards us with wide open arms and big biggy hugs!! When in Rome, as they say. đ
The U.S. is extremely culturally divided by regions. I'm from south Florida and there, you are immersed in Latino culture. So in general, everyone touches their right cheeks together and makes the kiss sound.
Depuis le covid je fais la bise plutĂŽt rarement, seulement avec la famille et les gens tactiles qui ne peuvent pas s'en empĂȘcher. Et depuis que j'ai dĂ©couvert le "hug" amĂ©ricain je le trouve plus intime que la bise car il faut toucher la personne. Ăa ne me gĂšne pas de faire la bise Ă des inconnus, mais je ne fais mĂȘme pas le hug avec des gens de ma famille!
Paul Taylor does a whole hour of standup about la bise.
I think the difference is that native huggers never get confused about where hands go for a hug... The bisers do get confused because there is no universal standard it can differ depending on where you're from.
Furthermore, I do feel that la bise is much less intimate and is a much more efficient greeting. and I always put my left hand on their right shoulder to indicate my intentions. I don't care if its a little odd at first, I'm not trying to kiss anyone.đ
The bisers. đđđđ
@@heatherheaney4060 đ
I wish each language could be taught using common literature. That is immersion, context, tense, etc.
Hunchback, Don Quixote, etcâŠ. Sign me up.
too much invasive lips close to lips kisses are sometimes accidental , but mostly someone's passing you a message, when it's your mom it's "i love you son" when it's a girl at a party it's "i like you boy" or "i like everyone, i'm drunk woooohoooo"
edit : or a guy
Câest vrai que lorsque les deux personnes vont du mĂȘme cĂŽtĂ© il y a un cĂŽtĂ© trĂšs gĂȘnant, surtout que ça arrive toujours avec les gens quâon connaĂźt le moins ^^
I always feel like a hug is way more intrusive than a bise.
My Swiss ex-brother in law always did three kisses and I never got used to it and I always blushed đ For 33 years! But it was endearing and so different than my numerous American relatives that I loved it. Besides his endless wine supply, I probably only miss his bises (cheater!) đ
I feel violated when I have to give a hug.
je suis d'une gĂ©nĂ©ration ou la bises se faisait uniquement entre parents trĂšs proches : parents , grands-parents , sĆurs et frĂšres , cousins cousines proches , oncles et tantes maternelle et paternels . autrement les poignĂ©es aux autres personnes , et une poignet de mains ferme et la mains sur l'Ă©paule a un camarade ou collĂšgue de travaille proches . la bise est venue au dĂ©but des annĂ©es 2000
I only go in for the hug using my left hand to touch their shoulder and my right hand to block my breasts (being busty I have had the pull-in, even from a minister...I learned quickly). Thanks for your content. I'm enjoying it here in California!
Beverly Alexander Martin
I've never been very "la bise" and with the COVID, it's happening less and less. The only ones I do it to are rather the children of my family (who also hug). With a child the hug is fine, but with an adult I feel like I'm being grabbed and I stiffen up, I really don't like it.
And no it's not ok, trying to kiss someone on the lips, nor on the cheek during "la bise".
But I'm a french girl in France and it never happend to me. Not on the lips (but almost when I change of region, or country, where they do not start from the same side đ so I juste wait. And when I was an infant learning how to do "la bise".)
Funny I think that both la bise or the handshake are still not back to the pre-covid level. Far from it. Some fistbump, most just say hello with no contact. Even between friends who use to kiss each other.
Not to say I've never done it, but man do I think air bise ridiculous.
Very often when you meet someone older, it will be him/her who will initiate if it's a bise or handshake. Especially if you know someone in common like in your example. Often it will be a bise if you're a girl and a handshake if you're a man.
The worst is men who want to kiss a woman who would prefer a handshake. Some never learn.
Ideas for the next video on the subject: handshake among relatives (quite common among men, even father and son) and la bise between men.
Absolutely the opposite!! Iâm a Mexican in the US. Hugs are harder to understand!
Bon Soir. I prefer the bise to a hug even though a bise is more intimate. A full body hug is more intimate than Les bisous.
Even among those who would normally ahake hands, it has become awkward. Do we shake? Do we fist bump?
Personally, I'll keep doing what I've always done. If I get a disease from you or vice versa, it probably happened long ago and we're either both immune or both dead.
I will not live in fear. There are too many ordinary concerns without adding the extraordinary.
The natural evolutionary process of a virus is to begin as a deadly strain. Then it mutates, each time becoming less dangerous and more contagious. It is not in the virus' survival interest to kill its host. It stands the best chance to propagate if it only inflicts minimal distress to the host while it spreads. The more harmful it is, the more of a target it becomes. But if it is mild, there is less of a fight and it can spread and continue its species. This is the way of things. Each new variant is much less dangerous than the last. But once you have been conditioned to fear a thing, logic and science matter not.
I heard Two or three bises historycally depende if you were protestantes or catholics
Iâm not sure if you mentioned it or not but I can tell you left the US a long time ago. Because most people do side hugs with the conservative women.
I'm french and sorry but I feel super unconfortable with that american hug ! I just cannot do this ! For me, la bise is ok with people I know well or gay men like me in gay bars. But actually, I prefer hand shaking.
Way too complicated.
USA BEST CULTULREđșđžâ€đ
America is the most advanced and efficient country. Culture is diverse and make more sense. France is irrelevant
Americans đ
@@benjaminamis4294 USA SUPERPOWERđșđžđșđžđșđž 1