00:00 INTRO 00:21 10 Having Terrifying Dreams Or Flashbacks About The Abuse. 01:06 09 Never Being Able To Relax. 02:01 08 Being Constantly Jumpy And Nervous. 03:02 07 Experiencing Physical Symptoms Or Reactions. 04:02 06 Avoiding Trigger Places, People, Or Activities. 05:01 05 Not Allowing Oneself To Become Vulnerable. 05:52 04 Being Unable To Regulate Emotions. 06:48 03 Having An Overwhelming Preoccupation With Their Abuser. 07:47 02 Feeling An Unshakeable Sense Of Guilt And Shame Over What Happened. 08:38 01 Believing Themselves To Be Unworthy Of Happiness. Do You Have Topics In Mind? Comment Below... Share This Video Right NOW: czcams.com/video/8WiC9wlXSkQ/video.html ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks for Watching! Are you an Empath? What more would you like to add? We would definitely love to know! DROP A LIKE, SHARE, Click the SUBSCRIBE Button and HIT that notification bell to get the latest updates! SUBSCRIBE to our CHANNEL NOW 👉👉👉 bit.ly/2U7fnZW Help Our Channel Reach Awareness Share it With your Friends and Family. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Videos You May Also Like: 10 Signs You're A Super Empath czcams.com/video/v3t6RO8hvoQ/video.html 10 Spiritual Gifts of The Empath czcams.com/video/wOK_DPZ9Eyk/video.html 10 Signs You're A Heyoka Empath czcams.com/video/7ZB9YW2Z20k/video.html 10 Reasons The Empath Struggles In A Relationship czcams.com/video/bHJM0obySg0/video.html 10 Things The Empath Needs In A Relationship czcams.com/video/NDKBmFzQKLs/video.html 10 Things That Set The Empath Apart From The Rest czcams.com/video/yUP2nRgcWgg/video.html Here's Why YOU SHOULD NEVER MESS With An EMPATH czcams.com/video/42CKb6wGZr4/video.html 10 Signs of the EMPATH RAGE czcams.com/video/AtKyC45edFI/video.html 10 Signs You're An Intimidating EMPATH czcams.com/video/6M8bvsBjqAM/video.html 10 SIGNS You're An INFJ EMPATH czcams.com/video/cWOh_1L0eIs/video.html Why Is The INFJ So Rare? czcams.com/video/ngbZmWJ6fi4/video.html How Do People View The INFJ? czcams.com/video/2O43CbjEk9s/video.html How INFJ Are You? | The INFJ TEST czcams.com/video/EOFHZMKNjBY/video.html One-Word That Describes The INFJ czcams.com/video/MwXmpR8W1QM/video.html
CPTSD sufferers have been hard-wired during the imprint period (in childhood) to abandon their own needs in favour of their abuser's. I had to tell myself that I can't keep setting myself on fire in order to keep others warm before I could convince myself to leave. In the past, every time I tried, I always got hoovered back in by the promise of change or a temporary improvement in their behaviour. The gaslighting can make it hard to trust and open up in the future but I'm so glad I did, there are many beautiful people out there and it's important to try and surround yourself with people who love and support you. Sending healing vibes to all fellow empaths. 💜
@@ZLLi661 I'm so sorry you went through this experience and that you lost your mother. I think maintaining no contact with him is definitely the best course. Stay strong friend.
Like many people both my parents were/are narcissists. Never apologizing and always beating down people around them to feel better about themselves. I've been fortunate to have a lot of good friends that showed me that narcissists are the exception, not the norm. You can't fix a narcissist. They have to try for themselves. The healthiest thing is to keep a lot of distance for both your sakes.
@@ZLLi661 Wow my god. There are so many evil people in this world.. Some people even say these people are obsessed by demons. I know/knew many bad people who treated me wrong all the time too, sadly they will always find a victim but not me anymore. Your story is heart breaking and i bet these people will get their karma.
The difference between CPTSD and PTSD is that with CPTSD, your core belief about yourself has been altered for the worse. Even after you've physically separated yourself from the narc, you still suffer and self-sabotage because of the distorted perspective that your abuser has made you believe about yourself. What really helped my hyper awareness is exercise. I think it's because it changed my breathing and it helped me live in the moment. I imagine yoga and meditation would also have the same effect. Also, it really helps get rid of those stress hormones (adrenaline, cortisol) and replaces them with endorphins. I wish all survivors of this insidious type of abuse extended periods of genuine happiness and bliss.
I swim. Long distance. Open water. Saved me. Grounded me. When a therapist diagnosed my ex as a covert, I read the #1 thing to do was guard your health. Apparently lots of targets get sick and die, or commit suicide. We need a functioning mental health care system for all.
@@AGenerationJones That's so cool. I love open water diving. I haven't gotten to do it much in recent years since I live in a city but I'd love to get back into it. I'm glad you're doing well. I hope your journey is blessed with healing and happiness.
When you’ve been traumatized over years, from a very early age, terror is woven into everyday life, so that almost anything can be a trigger. It’s so confusing, because you’re just going about your life, and suddenly, you feel overwhelmed and terrified, for no apparent reason. Dissociative amnesia occurs when I encounter triggering situations. I simply cannot remember that the event ever happened. It’s a protective mechanism, but when I first realized what was happening, I wondered what else I couldn’t remember. This is a trauma response, and even though it’s scary, it’s not abnormal in such situations. What we experience after being subjected to long-term trauma are normal responses to monstrous experiences.
EXACTLY! My friend is always asking me what's wrong I can't explain what the fuck is wrong with me. After every second, something triggers me and my stomach starts hurting i feel nauseous and i feel like crying. I hate this so much it's hard being this way at a young age oooooffff it doesn't feel good. What's the point in living, what if i died tomorrow? Would my parents realize their wrong? Would my bff break down? Would my brother be worried? Would my bullies even care at all? 😭💔 Sometimes i look at a knife and wonder what it'd be like to shove it as hard as fuck into my chest.
@@Killua_Zoldyck3407 Write everything down. It's safe to let it go when it's on paper. You don't need to remember all the things you want to say or discribe, right now. I have written my whole life. The trauma even ruined my ability to spell, to express myself. Still, being able to deal with your own thoughts after you are calm, in a better state of mind is going to help you to make sence of your life. You do need to talk to a person that can give you feedback. 1 visit to a counselor in the 7th grade changed my life. I told him about my fathers abuse. The counselor told me that my father was sick and there was nothing wrong with me. 50 years later, my Parents needed me. Hell became my life again. My abuser now was both my father and brother as they also abused Moma. See, you need to get this lesson figured out! You don't want to relive it! Forgot to mention, I did have a few abusive Bfs. Sorry if I am not a good writer. I care about you, you are hurting too much. Take Care.
I'm so relieved to see those words... thank you kind soul. For so long u feel alone It was all a mind game for a sick individual. I thank God for sparing me, my life and my children. Those were some very scary situations I was in. I'm so very grateful and blessed 🙌
Yes ma'am. I actually can't remember anything from before I was 13, but a lot of things set me off. Sometimes I've wondered if I were crazy because of the smallest things that can cause a panic attack or that will make my happy go lucky mood change to defensive pissed off faster than the speed of light.
Finally a video that makes sense. CPTSD from NPD mother. Traumatized as a child, re-victimized over and over again in relationships for 30+ years. It's ok to be alone now.
Glad for you that you discovered what was going on !! Pretty much the same here. Malignant narcs are the worst. You have to deal with 'm for years and after that you have to deal with the issues they cause, for longer than you've known them-- . It sucks... Hope you are recovering well. I took up surfing. Wasn't THAT much fun at first and wanted to quit but it's starting to work its magic on me. There's probably something out there for you as well, what ever it may be ! 😀
I agreed with it till the end when he said”let the narcissist know you are bruised but far from broken “… I disagree- don’t let the narcissist know 💩 lol If you have successfully detached from a narcissist, don’t tell them ANYTHING about how you feel or think. PERIOD. if you can manage it, don’t talk to them AT ALL.
This is what my family did to me. I lost my child and my friends because an elder thought it was a good idea to teach me a lesson. The lies and comparing was getting to be a bit much. The bad thing is, she doesnt believe she did anything wrong. May her sister handle her.
I also have CPTSD same situation. It does suck. Triggers seem to be everywhere these days. Prayers and Love to all. May Christ Keep Us Strong, Safe and give us the Peace beyond understanding that you have Promised.
My pastor mentions the end times every week during the preach. This gives me anxiety and it causes overwhelm and overthinking. Does this happen to you also?
@@TJBear ~ while it is good to preach on that topic, it shouldn't be the only subject he teaches on. I would suggest reading from the Psalms every day. I also believe that born again believers will be raptured to Christ and will not experience what the rest of the world will endure. We will be enjoying the benefits of Heaven with no more abuse, no more pain, no more anxiety! God bless you TJ! I will be praying for you!!
I know but we are what God said and not the abuse remember jesus Christ is always with you and he taught you through the abuse not to be the abuse much love and light
Suggest getting professional therapy sooner than later. If this hangs on it can definitely get worse, much worse. Isolation, depression, lack of trust in new relationships and a general flat line of your personality. No, I'm not a doctor, I know from experience.
55 years of trauma was finally cured by listening to frequency music, bi-neural tones. It was a bumpy ride and it took 3 years but it was worth it! Just start by saying 'I forgive myself' and the mind will do the rest, trust me! Also, what helped me was the realisation that I was addicted to my own stress hormones! Crazy I know but it was true. I had been living with stress for so long that my body had become addicted to the chemicals stress produced. Always putting myself in stressful situations and not understanding why??? That revelation really helped. Also, pass the judgment over to God. It's God's business now. He/Karma will deal with it. Love and light to us all. Good luck! Xxx
It's been years and I'm still not recovered from the abuse.. I can't even be me, the real me.. I'm so guarded I can't be around people without thinking that everyone is going to abuse me all over again
I actually have a high pain tolerance…but very low tolerance to stimuli. I was told I don’t have PTSD but severe case of C-PTSD and that’s hurtful. I don’t like being around people for too long. Everyone has the ability to trigger me. Isolation for now is best since I was diagnosed with MS.
@@sonialawton4010 I remember how I felt a year ago. This moment. Wishing you the best! Life does get better…but the MS well hopefully you’re pushing through it! 🧡
What are you doing empaths???what are you doing??Rise up from crows!!crows are only for dead food!!Rise up,take your power back,take responsibilities of you!!remaining on these pathological badly treated behaviours??Who are they??Who are they??Rise up ,turn the page of your life,make a new beginning!!it is evident!!stay humble,be courageous,be silent but be strong,too strong inside you!!you have to see their stepping back soon!!with commitment,with patience, with clear mind,with honesty,with presence!!❤️❤️🌟✌️
This is a very good general overview to share with people who are around the person who's been abused to this state, to perhaps help them understand better. Most, unknowingly, contribute more trauma to the already broken down self perspective of a person who's isolated, often socially challenged after years of isolation and gaslighting, and seeking someone to see them after all that they've been through, yet are often met with more invalidation.
I have copied your words to my journal, so very real! Thank you. Invalidation.. like a bad conversation no matter what you say, you are bested and invalidated by THEIR more valid experience. Also jealousy. The neglected, abused and invalidated child is abused for their beauty, body, brains, achievements, talents. I find it hard to realise that my own achievements are not celebrated but derided. You would think they'd be proud of you as it increases their standing, but no. They hate and attack. Zero contact for 23 yrs now, have left them behind, but still suffer in social situations, hyper vigilant to any disrespect towards me.
I educated myself on my abuse meditated listen to music journaled slowly found myself with alone time everyday and only responded to him if it had to deal with the kids it's been a long hard road but I can honestly say iv had more peace and happiness now ❤️
Here! I was diagnosed years ago as being bipolar but in the past year while working with professionals diagnosed as have PTSD and a highly sensitive person. So genetics and the environment we are all raised both play parts in our development. I’ve been labeled many things through life. I dislike labels on one hand but in the other hand it helps me understand more about myself and become a better me. I used to think it was just a burden but as I age I find peace and safety in the personality I’ve been given and can see lessons in my trails. I feel blessed and feel less of a need to fit in find those I have even more valuable.
I'm not sure, but I'm leaning this way. In fact, I'm wondering if a narcissist wasn't involved in my diagnosis, now. I don't know. My diagnosis, and original problems, etc. Came when I was single, though. Before my first relationship. So, it's really not possible. Though, I'm sure that problems from relationships that were caused to fail didn't help my situation, they aren't at all my primary issue.
To live a life alone is so appealing to me. I’ve had two conventional doctors in my life, to remind me at the end, “Dana, you’re an empath.” What they’ve always said without words : “why are you with him”
I have recently ended my 12 year relationship with a narcissist. He ended up isolating me away(over 1200mi) from everyone(friends , family, and then any coworker I would get close to.) He would say things like..."What are you telling them about me now(when he was the furthest thing of being the topic of our conversation.) Or you care about them more than you do me(when all I did was work and come home.)" It was cool for me to work 12 to 16hr a day to support us(cuz he refused to work-cuz he was "sick & dying.") Meanwhile, come to find out he wanted me at work(without a vehicle, or when I had one, wanted me to let him know when Ieft work), cuz he was hooking up with the neighbor methhead, prostitute(literally), along with at least 20 other women. When I found out everything and he could no longer deny it or manipulate me, he exploded. He sold our house, everything in it, and took off with our vehicle-leaving me stranded and homeless within 12 days. He had been in Florida(having an affair with his mother's 60+ year old hairdresser), which has become his next victim, for 4 months. He had been telling me his gma was dying and he had to take care of her or the state would come after him. I guess he thought I was dumb too. I studied family law for years in the state of FL. I told him that he needed to come home and face me like a man, see my face and the damage he did to me. Well he did, doing what I mentioned as soon as he got there. Meanwhile, crying, begging, & pleading with me to forgive him, that he loved me, etc. I literally laughed at him. Telling him someone that loves someone doesn't do the things you did to a person. I moved back home to South FL last August. It's me and my kitty baby. That's it will ever be from here on out. Ppl try saying...In time you'll be in another relationship. Ummmm, NO, I WONT! The abuse he put me through and what I endured from him, I will live and be alone for the rest of my days. I NEVER want to experience that again. The only way to make sure that doesn't happen is for me to be alone. I work and come home. I don't trust anyone. I've also realized the narcissistic abuse began with my mother. I left home at 15 because of it. Unfortunately, I subjected myself to numerous abusive relationship because of it.
@@tiffanythomas5750 I don't blame you. I finally found my Husband. But I actually had a written list of what I would not have in my life! It's been 25 years together. But if I lose him, I will be content with my dogs. Get some good hobbies. Working with your hands and the earth is good♡
I have almost recovered from most of these symptoms. Thanks to my family especially my 4 year old adorable and playful nephew. Spending time with him kept me busy and creative. He, unknowingly, restored my mental health, filled my life with happiness. I pray fervently everyday to quite my mind of any negative thought. Thank God my family and friends are my greatest supporters. God bless you all. 🙏
God bless and be with you! I can relate. I’m over the suicidal thoughts. Anxiety has become a lot more manageable. Still deal with depression more often than I would like. I think exercising and journaling most definitely helped. Even making sure I have enough vitamin D daily helps a lot. I had a life coach speaking to her helped a lot as well. I’m 37 and just understanding what’s happened to me… it definitely got worse over time, not better. I wish I had gotten some form of therapy much sooner in my adulthood. I was trying to manage it with alcohol smh.. worked for a while, but over time it only made it worse. Hang in there as hopeless as it feels at times you can put in the work to get to a more stable place. Definitely takes time, patience and determination. My kids have been my biggest source of strength to keep pushing forward and I am determined to live the life I deserve. I truly wish you the best.
Thank you. My heart truly hurts from so much abuse. I've had PTSD since I was 9 when my father passed away unexpectedly. 54 now and Im pretty sure my mother is a narcissist. A lifetime of this. I feel saness for people I don't know but want to share there life's with me. I overwhelmed and now just hide and stay t myself. . I don't want hurt anymore.
@@tashaequeen8935 I'm tired of being scared I'm tired of knowing what people think and feel... Do I have to build a wall around myself? Or shall I shine so brightly that only good genuine people can come near me 🤔.... I'm not religious but I guess everyone has there own version of the almighty..
I use to believe I was unworthy of happiness spent 25yrs fighting narcissist parents and siblings when I confronted them they backed of real quick...all thanks to the love and support of my soon to be wife who's never let me down from the day I met her,
The only reason an empath can experience PTSD is when they themselves dont know that they're super sensitive and how to handle energies around them. I suffered from PTSD and later depression just because a person who sat next to me, he was a pervert and tried to molest me. But just this little incident, just because i absorbed his energy caused PTSD and depression for 6-7 long years. I am completely healed now and know how empowered i am and so is each one of you.
Sad when you realize you have almost all these symptoms. I specifically have trauma nightmares and flashbacks, avoiding triggers, emotional dysregulation, intense shame and guilt, and ruminating about my abuser and obsessed with why they treated me this way.....
Yah, how lucky we are. Our lives could have been so much more? ...I said, “Could have.” It depends on the empath & severity of their C-PTSD. I just thought I could do anything in life. I just didn’t see people this ugly & selfish. It has been & is my biggest struggle. Trying to live (work) day to day & not show any emotion when triggered by clients or customers. Its so hard. I move forward all alone in my life. Its best this way.
Me too! I replied to someone else's comment on this thread of my experience. NOONE SHOULD EVER GO THROUGH & ENDURE WHAT I DID!!! I WILL NEVER EVER BE IN ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP AGAIN! I go to work, make my money, and come home. It's me and my big cat(he is my world.) I've decided to become an old cat lady. I have friends and acquaintances. Well really one good friend that I've known for 35 years. She begged me to leave him for years. I tried, but he pulled me back in every time. The others in my life(coworkers, customers, old friends thay I haven't seen in years-due to him isolating me from everyone), have no idea where I live, work, etc. I keep everyone at an arm's length distance now. I will not risk ever enduring that again.
@@tiffanythomas5750 I totally understand you. I have also decided now to draw away from lots of people if I can. I had a husband for 20 years, ....after divorce I quickly got married again,5 years so far, but he is a similar type of personality like the first husband( very controlling and abusive,maybe more clever) .I gave him all my trust (stupid me) only to find out it was a mistake. He just gathered information to use it against me. I left him ,we are 1 year separated now but he wants me to come back. Everything in me says No. But I got to see him once more to collect my things from his house. I need extra prayers on that day. I only left with a suitcase. I am lucky I still have kids,they are my world. And they are with me. They kept a connection to their father from my first marriage.. But they understand now much more of Abuse. I hope they will choose the proper spouses when they grow up. I decided I don't want a man anymore in my life. I need peace more than anything
@@swissherbgirl2917 I understand wanting your things. However, you've gone a year without it already. Is it truly worth it? I have all of my exes things. He took off after selling our home, leaving everything behind. He is also back in FL, but is about an hr and 20min from where I am. He harassed me about his things and wanting them. To me if they meant that much to him, he wouldn't have left them behind. He kept asking where I lived. I told him the general area which huge and has a couple million ppl in the area. I offered to get a storage unit for a week. Saying, I'd bring all his stuff there and he could retrieve afterwards. He didn't want that. It was just an excuse to try to see and manipulate me again. If u really have to go...bring someone with u.
I had cptsd from npd parents. Now, it’s back since breaking up with a guy who has npd. I’m effed up from the abuse. I cannot describe that as a relationship, more like being prey for a predator. It wasn’t until I was discarded that I even knew what npd is.
Palina Prasasouk • Unfortunately your story is oh so familiar hunny. Take good care of yourself & stay focused on doing what brings you most joy & happiness in your life. Learn to meditate & practice mindfulness & Self Love techniques. Be patient & trust your gut instincts always. You've got this!!! 💛💝😍
This same thing happened with me and went on for 7½ years until I was discarded by my now ex. She left at 1:30am new years this year so 1/1/22 and it's now end of April and I'm barely getting a tiny bit comfortable to be around anyone now. And that's pushing it. I feel for you, it really is something I never knew about either until I started researching what the hell was happening to me and discovered all of this. 7½ years too late though unfortunately. And I had known this girl for 9 years before we decided to even date...so what I thought was an amazing friendship then turned relationship of 16-17 years in total...to nothingness and a complete waste.
Common myth is nightmares repeating like a movie. If you have ptsd your more likely having nightmares with holes or most commonly feelings and emotions tied to those things. You can have dreams about say spiders that kicks you flight freeze or fight emotions. Dreams don't have to be a repeat of the situation, but a repeat of the feelings experienced. Your more likely to have flashbacks or reminders to triggers.
I can, unfortunately, relate! You’ve also explained a lot I didn’t understand. I have not help produce children due to the fear that I could never be a good parent. I was called too sensitive, among other things, and still struggle to this day. Thanks for sharing this information.
Sometimes sensitive people are the best parents! Obviously, they didn't really know you calling you so sensitive! Don't believe the propagation! All the best moving forward! ❤
Oh my God, you have no idea how hard this was for me to watch. I really really struggled to get through this, stopping and breathing many times. I am in a very DV situation on top of everything else and this was too much. EDIT I literally cried and tried to hold back this entire video. *THIS IS ONE OF THE HARDEST VIDEOS I'VE EVER SUBJECTED MYSELF TO.....Because if this is true, I'm NOT crazy, and the abuse is more real than I can emotionally handle* , and that's *TERRIFYING* .. I'm a worthless PoS, and I don't deserve to be, nor have I earned the luxury, to be happy. Some of us are just too far gone, and that's a reality that toxic positivity preachers have to learn. Some of us are truly 100% *ALONE IN THIS WORLD.*
I'm very sorry to read these words from you! My heart hurts to think that you truly believe this about yourself. Please know that you're at least not 100% alone, I'll try and be here to help, even if it's just to listen... My thoughts and prayers are with you! God bless.
You absolutely are mistaken to believe those things about yourself. There's so much out there, you have to have enough faith that you can reach some of those things and take control of your life. Get counseling and if it doesn't seem to help get another counselor. Counselors are free in most municipalities, depending on income. Take a few steps. That's how you start. Get out of the house more. Get away from abusers. Don't believe their cruel verbal garbage which they fling at sensitive people because they themselves are such insecure losers who want to control and gaslight to feel better about themselves. You were not born to be abused or tormented. Understand that and get help to move towards freedom. You can recover. Been there and still working on it.
I think the hardest thing is to learn (relearn) that it's not you. You didn't do anything wrong. It wasn't your fault. And then break the cycle of abuse (ie go from Narcissist parents to Narcissist partner.)
My mother survived divorce from one alcoholic narcissist pnly to be "rescued" by another. She didn't know what a healthy relationship was like because her father shut down after a family tragedy and was emotionally dead -- and became an alcoholic(!). My mother got me counseling at a very young age because I was quiet, sad, distant. My male role models were sick. My best and only friend in high school was a narcissist, I now realize. My stepfather found a bigger narcissist than he was after my mom died. She made him her victim and took everything. He was vicious toward us kids to the end. I always thought *I* was the emotionally sick one. Watch out for that trap.
I was my dad with dementia’s only caregiver for 6 years. My dad was the most kind gentleman I’ve ever known. He became the total opposite! Violent, abusive, delusional, and paranoid. I was just diagnosed with caregiver PTSD
Stay strong, brother. It is always darkest before the dawn, and the tides are turning in the spiritual way. I wish you the best in your future endeavors.
Go to court fight for them kids I had to take it there. Let your son know you’re fighting for him . She twist his brain to hate you even if you explain to him ur tried. Get the LAW Ain’t No Bitch over the law.
@@ASE_Avenue well it's more complicated than that because she has got me in so much trouble I will likely get more time. She threw the cops at me again after we split and her new guy was accusing her of seeing me. I want even talking to her. She just did it to pull him in and show that she's over me and to get me at the same time and Im not on the birth certificate because we had a n.c.o. when he was born. I'm pretty much at her mercy. She an evil genius and planned this the whole time and even told me and used it to threaten me and keep me in abusive relationship. The court just takes the females side and with my priors and no money for a decent lawyer I don't think there's any chance to get them to accept the truth that I'm the victim. She has done far more I just never reported anything.
She had been f****** with me since her first child. She told me it was my kid and then right before she had it disappeared and got married to some other guy and it ended up not being my kid and I was stupid and got back with her and she said that she wanted to have a kid with me and then she's going to love me forever and all this stuff and we all know how that goes. So there's a chance to kid might not even be mine I mean it looks like me but the other guy she was seeing also looks similar.
This is so true !! I'm living on my survival mode all the time . Walking on egg shells . Watching my words . Being very careful and living on my nerves constantly. . My gut feeling hadn't let me down yet .! .
So now I know why I am why I am. . . I have every single one of those symptoms. It's awful. . I can't watch tv cos tv triggers it off. .I can't go home to my place of birth cos of triggers and flashbacks . . Being c-ptsd makes life hard . Emotionally and physically so I hermitise . I shut myself away from life . I isolate . .
Yes this is a response of our bodies and mind to protect us. I know that after some time with therapy and a 12 step recovery program we can, at times lower our guard. I started trying this out alone in my house. I would say to my self " I am safe here, I am alone and no one can hurt me in this moment" I kept adding more time to this practice. I then walked around the block and had no triggers thank god . We can heal. We are good people. We deserve good things, great things In life. Bless you and keep moving forward. z
No one has ever explained my life with this level of accuracy. Thank you so much for making this video. It revealed why I feel so stuck in my journey towards healing from narcissistic abuse. I always ponder about what happened and it has become a habit. I should stop it now. Also narcissist is not my standard. I am yet to discover who I am and define my own standards. Once again thank you.♥️
My ex GF gave me second hand PTSD, she would tell me stories of her past lovers and the abuse she received endlessly! I started to realise she was doing it to hurt me. She would tell horrific stories that broke me then when I tried to help her or comfort her she would push me away and act like I was being overbearing. She would tell the same stories over and over in gory detail and always chose the stories that she knew bothered me the most, I just wanted to help her so badly but never could. I have nightmares about the things I heard! I loved her so much but she broke me and now I can't move on and I'm too scared to start any new relationship now. 😒
Only you can end it. YOU have too learn more about the real you and take time too cultivate quiet seas . I had a thought every morning what gear am I in and what can I do too bring it down good 👍
Recognize unhealthy thoughts and change your reaction or response to them. For example, I struggled with this one in particular "I miss the person they used to be, they can't possibly be all bad right?" Recognize that thought and replace it with "That person was not real and their unacceptable behavior negates whatever good I saw in them." You literally have to change the rhetoric of your internal monologue. Takes a lot of practice. You have to convince yourself that this is the truth... Because it IS. Sending 💕
It’s important to force yourself to embark on self care, start small, make sure you are eating well and getting enough sleep. And learn about yourself and your traumas, it’s the most empowering way to move through the dark time. Good luck xo
Some days I'm good and others I'm completely lost and completely lost and confused. Wondering why I didn't leave b4 I was thrown away and wondering why I ignored all of the red flags. The gaslighting and the push pull dynamic. It's been almost 3yrs since it ended and I'm still trying to fund a way to heal and get through it.
Welcome to the reality of the “show”, it’s textbook their behaviors and our destruction. I am 3 years out and finding my good days are more than my bad. I am big on the own your own part mentality. I overlooked things being off, believed Love and example concurs all! I have a new, well earned mindset. Evil is evil, there are those who desire to serve such. I am not one of those. I wish/pray you healing and restoration. As with Iron when broken and welded back in place, that becomes its strongest point! Sending Hope your way….🌸🎯
Yes. I periodically blame myself. I knew my “friend” was bad. I knew something was off. But I blue thru all the red flags for35 yrs simply because she was ‘fun’.
I also blame myself. Doesn't matter that my brain knows that he is totally evil, still I have some very strong bond towards him and always come forward the feeling that it is my fault and blame and ruin myself....its a so much deep pain...
@@johnd.2803 I quicly checked it but no. In the first period he was very nice with me. Gave me a lot of compliments. We talked a lot and shared with each other a lot of personal things, mutually. This period created a strong bond inside me towards him. But after this he started a triangulation, mentioning and appreciating that other woman did hurt me so much. And when I showed it to him he said that it is not normal, its a "red flag" from me, and started to ignore my messages and me...
I've gotten over most of these. I have a great psychologist, and I'm realizing I'm most likely not an INFJ. I notice patterns. I noticed the narc's patterns and I did not buy into a lot of it. Perhaps I'm an INTP, because I notice my own patterns as well. These are, of course, personal patterns. The difficulty I am still dealing with, is the inability to regulate emotions, at least, to a certain extent. But, yes. Even that is getting better. Just give yourself your own space, I never look back, and I'm so-o-o-o glad I left--never going back.
I am an ENFJ, and know that being with a Narcissist “jacked” up my old self…. Getting back to my Protagonist ways, but with better boundaries. Wishing you well, joy, and peace. I have taken up new hobbies, and am trying not to look back at the prior destructive force which I allowed to change me. My life is MINE to live and I’m damn determined to live My Best Life, that is the best outcome for all of us🌸🙌
I guess I just found out I have C-PTSD. Half surprised, half not surprised. My biggest problems are an inability to relax, though I’m getting better at it, and getting stuck thinking about WHY. I’m learning more about my abuser and none of it is good. I wish I could cut my mother some slack, but she really did my head in with all her BS.
Wow. This is me. Every word. I've been diagnosed for a little over 2.5 years. My first trauma series of events began when I was 13 (sexual and emotional abuse by a close family relative that was also a narcissist- he was married to my narcissistic mother. Nothing was ever good enough- grades, my weight (I was an average sized teenager, even my friends- if I made a new friend and let's say had a sleepover like most kids do, as soon as the friend would leave, they'd rip them apart like I was hanging out with the dregs of society. Nevermind that they were honor students, extremely talented athletes, or the most important one- that they genuinely cared about me. My biological dad was my escape. He was my best friend- my parents divorced when I was 3. I never bonded with my mother, but my dad was everything to me. He was an empath too. So we related and understood each other. I visited him as much as possible even going against the custody orders. For some sick reason, noone told me he was sick, I had no idea that he was dying and on borrowed time til the last 2 weeks of his life when my mom and I went to where he was in the hospital, for 3 days, I hung out with him in his room, he'd scoot over in bed so we could watch TV together. Then on the 4th day, he made the final turn and was on a ventilator for 9 days. I still had no idea he was dying. I thought he was in for something minor. So walking into his room and seeing him on life support was one of the worst things I've ever seen from an emotional standpoint. I didn't know if I'd ever see his eyes open again. He had the most beautiful blue eyes I'd ever seen. He also had a terrible stutter- think like Mel Tillis the country singer. But I never viewed it as a "disorder", to me it actually him apart from other dads. He was so kind, and funny, and loving to everyone. I dream about him alot. He passed at 45 years old. I'm 46 and it still feels fresh. My escape and my happy place were gone when he passed 4 days after my 15th birthday. I actually hate my birthday because it takes me back to turning 15 and I know what comes next. By the way. I told my mom what was going on with my stepdad after the first time, she didn't believe me and even said "if its true. you probably did something to instigate it" at 13, in 1988, we didn't wear skimpy clothes, I never did because my mom and stepdad were obsessed with my weight- they equated it to my worth- like a washer or dryer at a scratch and dent store on discount. Image and status was everything. By the time I was 20, I couldn't take it at my parents house between a drunk stepfather that was chasing me around the house when my mom wasn't around , to the constant fights every day between them or both against me, I had to get out and start a life somewhere. I'd been dating someone about a 8 months, we moved in together, my parents drama abuse made me not focus on this guy. I let alot slide rather than seeing him for what he was- a MONSTER. I've only referred to him as The Devil since I escaped after 4 years of some of the worst abuse- physical, sexual, and mental warfare and gas lighting. Noone ever looked for me. I may have only seen my parents once a year and I wasn't allowed to have friends- they'd divert from him, yes. Seriously. I made peace every day that I might not wake up. He did things to smother, asphyxiate, and strangle me til I'd pass out. I had to accept that this was how I'd get out as in died. I'd never seen them at all button pererfect and finally going to me dying and just accept and disconnect from myself. I finally left in 1999 after being held at knife point for about 12 hours because I told him I was leaving and just let me go. He tore up EVERY stich of clothing, shoes, and even down to undergarments. I only had some pj's on so I waited for him to get to sleep and then I left. I had to drive over an hour and a half over to my parents house but I couldn't shake the guy stalked me for over a year. He died of rectal and Colon cancer about 2 months ago it was the happiest and most cathartic moment I've ever had. Happy that I was no longer watching out for him but cathartic because everything that he'd done came back at once. 4 years of all 3vtypes of abuse daily. I was 20 when it started. 24 when it ended. I'm 46. That's how long I've still been looking over my shoulder. The trauma that' came back made me reevaluate the situation. I don't even remember the day we met. But if there really is a hell, I hope they've started to bust out the big shit that they save for special cases, because he certainly had me in hell on earth.
Narcissist psychopaths have an instinct to find people like us who have been abused. They actively look and find us. Somehow we give off that vibe that we've been abused and they pick up on it. They sure seem to find me
@sophieallen6334 I have. Sometimes it takes walking away and realizing that we do have worth and that the only person who can truly love us the way we need to be loved is ourselves. I'm very careful about who I keep in my inner circle. We CAN choose our own families. Maybe not by blood, but definitely as far as a support system.
I'm so glad someone has finally done a video that covers CPTSD and being an empath. It's a totally different playing field than just being one or the other. Trying to blend the two together, even with years of therapy can be extremely tricky.
Thank you so much for this great video. One thing I love is that your closed caption sticks around a bit longer than any other video. It helps me because as a person with ADHD I have to really focus, especially while trying to think straight because of this nasty, miserable, Covert Narcissistic man that I am dealing with. It's not a healthy relationship. He is very bad for me. I need to get out of this house because it's more work to get by everyday by just being cordial to him. Everything is work and stress for me and he won't cooperate with me on anything. He will torture me mentally and more so emotionally. He will provoke me and he will blame me for anything he can gets his hands on. I am tired of this bulls-t. I want to move on and grow. I have grown and changed a bit because I see so much of his deliberate nonsense going on and stand up for myself and I will say how I feel and stand my ground. He acts like I am supposed to be with him forever and should heal him, fix him and take his sh-t all the time and he puts so much stress on me that everything is my duty in the relationship. Please pray for me. Thanks again.
Please also get therapy. As you can see there is a growing community of support. Id suggest you reach out and plan your escape as being around narcs is highly harmful including to you and can lead to you being exploited and severe mental health issues.God will help you and take your problems from you, so we'll all pray for peace and peace of mind XXX take care xxx
@@julietcrowson3503 Try finding a therapist or doctor that knows about Narcissism. They couldn't understand the detail of the behavior for the life of them. Where do you see a sign that says therapy that specializes in Narcissistic abuse? I haven't seen one in 4 years after educating myself about Narcissists and in my case the Covert Narcissist man that tears your insides out. Luckily I survived from sinking down to the bottom of the sea and him tormenting me down to make me go there again. Nice help I got from therapist's that said rethink your marriage blah blah blah and that's what almost made me do myself in because not one mentioned his behavior and recognizing it after explaining this over and over to one therapist after another.
@@nd612 - Narcissism is psychology 101. I found a therapist who specializes in narc abuse by using the Google search. Didn't like her - she pushed my buttons. I needed someone to be gentle and freaking accept me after all the $hi- I'd been through. Ended up going to a community health therapist. She was great. Also started working on my trauma with a peer support person. She is AMAZING. Now I'm working with a private therapist who specializes in trauma. I really like her. She's calming, soothing.
See you tube channels Dr. Ramani (Durvasula) plus she hosts webinars Surviving Narcissism channel by Dr. Les Carter Watch them so you know what therapists are crap.
This is all true..my narcisstic ex wife of 31 years..always had affairs some I found out about but there were many I could never prove but she always wanted to give me enough signs to show me that she was cheating while lying till she was blue in the face saying she wasn't..knowing she was tearing me up inside....certain songs,words,places etc take me right back and relive that pain. It happens weekly..i felt forced to go live alone and not bother with people.. I thought I was alone feeling this way but listening to these videos made me realize I'm not.. They tear you down slowly..even the strongest ppl can be aaffected.. And she was always trying to destroy my good name in front of my friends,family and the whole community in general because she couldn't stand the fact that I was liked and respected
Turning loss into gain. Knowing what my worth is and never insecure about my TRUTH. And actually doing the opposite to what the narsacist wanted or expected through their demoralising of the empatheticly sensative intuitive minds and facing up leaning in and owning my self like the BOSS OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND RESPECT I HAVE EARNED LONG AND HARD FOR EONS OF LIFETIMES. This disarms and destroys the the methodology of a narsacist. Because when an empatheticly sensative intuitive can understand about how they are and not allow anyone to steal their light they become destroyers of the world of NARSASISTIC PATHETIC EVIL SELF SERVICING FOOL'S. LOVE IS THE GREATEST POWER ON EARTH AND IN THIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE. OWN YOUR GIFTS LIKE A DAMN UNSHAKABLE BOSS RARE BLESSED ONE'S!!!🌹🙏💝🌹🙏💎🙏🌹 NAMASTE.
That LAST PART HIT 🎯. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE LOST EVERYTHING. I MEAN LITERALLY HAVE. NO vehicle, no $, no home, no relationship, no trust in myself to detect good people from bad, I feel I am bad. I am stuck taking care of two dogs, dogs he wanted during our relationship because I know they wouldn't make it if they were with him, but I am not doing so great myself but I want to give them stability. I am already sad about them not being able to live forever so I get resentful about everything. I am not getting the help I deserve it is making things worse
I am sorry to hear that ..i feel alot the some but i try to fight for keep on living ..i have a dog too ...hatd for me to take care but i am doing all i can..couse is realy love of my life ..
YES.. this is me exactly but I have a cat not a dog. See if you can find my post up above because I can't type it all out again. But this is exactly my living hell too. So sorry we have to go through this. Noone will help me either. 😢
Dude I can’t find a single day of peace even small moments of happiness goes away quick af . I hate this bruh she just living her bests life while slandering me and using my kids as a weapons.
Kids have their rights to choose too so should be able to choose when to see you. All kids need both/ all loving parents. Parents just have to be civil to each other after their relationship breaks up. Masculinism is better known these days.
Idk... Maybe when I just woke up right now literally... Turned on this video. Cried the whole time though the video.... Maybe this right now, this moment I realize, I might have cpstd because everyone of these is my life, every day.... That's when.
What you guys are calling empaths, other people call autism spectrum. I'm taking in 100% of everything from all my senses all the time and some of them can be very annoying. But because I'm taking in so much, when people talk to me I'm assessing their body language, their tone, and everything about them; picking up on emotions and all kinds of things. So conversations always mean so much more to me than just what was said. Have been separated from my narcissistic wife for a few months now and finally starting to come out of the cloud of chaos that I have been in the midst of for some years now. Having to learn who I am all over again.
Likely in 2016 once I started gaining traction towards my independence from old life and being betrayed by a former friend who ended up being a narcissist in their own way due to abuse from their families too. Wouldn't say I'm quite over it yet but definitely better progress than years ago
I have so many of these signs. I'm sometimes jumpy, don't allow myself to be vulnerable until I really get to know people, I avoid places where I have felt triggered in the past and am unable to regulate emotions sometimes, especially when I feel sadness, fear or anger due to ptsd.
After dad died, I was diagnosed with PTSD. It was traumatic due to the fact that I had lost my best friend (the one who understood me most). He and my mom were narcissists (despite themselves). Wonderful people, just terrible at letting me be freer to live my life. I do get jumpy and it doesn't help I work in a warehouse (LOL). I've overcome quite a few things. I have decided at this point that if I am supposed to be alone without a family I'll be alright. Maybe that's how it is supposed to be ? I'll never know.
So on point. I must be an empath. I experienced this 100%. However, the narcissist is brewing up a new attack and I see his plan. I am going to unmask him this time. Yes, it is time to unmask the narcissist. Bring whatever it may.
I hear you, though calling out the narc usually goes badly for the empathy. You may want to check out Dr Ramani on why not to call them out, especially if you're still with them.
When they said I lost everything, that's absolutely true, I've lost my confidence, opportunities haven't came my way and I'm literally homeless 😞 I don't have any type of health
And me thinking I was cured from not one but hundreds of narcissists in my life. Thank you for the video! Now I can merrily go on and get the remaining 6 symptoms away as well! Keep up the good work 👌🏽🏆🏆🏆🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🎉
I'm not broken...society is.... After decades of abuse...what happens to the very livid and pissed off empaths who don't want violence, but yes a voice !?!?! I demand it so !!!
17 years after my relationship ended with a narcissist. I'm still going through this. It drives me nuts I still dream almost every night of him while I have absolutely no feelings for him anymore. I mean, 17 years... Get the hell out of my dreams and thoughts already! And I haven't had a relationship since. I'm too afraid of feeling stuck in a relationship again. I keep people at an arm distance. And also having Avoidant Personality Disorder doesn't make it easier.
If one is txting u they seem to dominate ur time and sleep deprivation. At least that’s what iv experienced. Not only twisting things but very manipulative to achieve there goal.
After the abuse of a narc the feeling of betrayal and disrespect are overwhelming this is not going to get better with out counseling and time but the narc is gone and the worst is over stay no contact get on with your life and be the person who you want to be that narc creature will never change but you can move on and be free of that toxic childish behavior God bless
It happened to me when I last my mom as a young boy and again as an adult meeting a manic bipolar guy who was abusive, or tried to be. By then, my boundaries were too good. Thanks for the video.
I found out about my C-PTSD from a phycologist. I havent moved passed jt, i still feel like im there. Memories still pleage my mind and nightmares still keep me up. Atleast im over the Stockholm syndrome
My mother is an extreme covert narcissist, and Ive been no contact with her for two and a half years. I fear running into her, and I cannot wait until I get the news that she has gone from this earth. The longer I am away from her, the worse the flashbacks get. My memories of all of the thirty years of dismissal, baiting, shaming, gaslighting and physical abuse just keep flooding back onto me. Im not sure if Im going to survive, but the knly reason I don't unalive myself is because it would give her great pleasure. So.
I have C-PTSD, and a sigma empath. I have shut down, and stay away from people, Now I welcome the flash backs,nightmares, I understand them, and they no longer bother me. I have faced my past, and am healing. That's how you can stop it.
First they diagnosed me with borderline Which was no treatment for It would just pass over time So that was really reassuring and motivating (not) So i went back and asked for a new one and than it became PTSD And both diagnosis is because of Abuse or neglect That was explanation from the so-called exper I have no family no support whatsoever Even the police told me I was a punching bag For people to mess with And i had to get used to it So that made me feel also so much better So never go there again I handle the narcs my way now I'm tired of not being able to defend myself and just call the police when I'm half-dead cause only then they may be able to help you but usually not Cause you need to prove the abuse And then one time i was in court And the judge told me i wasn't allowed to cross my legs Is that a law ? I didn't know that So if judge decides what i should do with my own body There's no chance So i understand this woman who killed 7 men And was executed for it Even though they abused her So it's ok to torture people as long as you don't kill them Great justice system
I have PTSD ...to a lesser degree now - but inadvertently, I have found myself in triggering places sometimes and heard somewhere that the way to get through it - is to steel yourself and create good memories..in those places. ;)
It's been 10 years. Still didn't recover. I tried to trust the wrong people along the way. That made it much worse. I still don't trust anyone. Every time I let my guard down, people take advantage of my kindness, assume it's weakness, and I become a money dispensing doormat. So at least for right now, it's better to be alone.
The prt2 channel is the only channel I use the first few links are for the prt1 channel. I've been feeling suicidal I have had depression ever since I was 8 and now I am ready to give up completely cause of narcissistic family abuse the same constant gaslighting,being framed for stuff,lied on,having to lie on myself and even put on acts for people like my parents and getting locked up to fit other peoples agendas.i will put the second video evidence channel links after the ones for the prt1 channel. (Do not report this i will not get helped and my family will just make up a lie on me and I'll get locked up in a mental hospital Which is worse than prison.) I have been going through abuse my whole life and now i'm nearly 16.Now my parents can get away with it even more easily.Cause my mom has false diagnoses all over me 14 That i know of but I am sure there's more.Which I didn't actually start getting diagnoses put on me ever in my life untill I moved in with my mom for the first time when I was 10 the summer before 5th grade in 2016.which I moved back and forth so when I was 12 that's when she started getting serious diagnoses put on me.my family takes advantage of those diagnoses so now when someone makes a DSS report or the police get involved my parents can just bring up the diagnoses and the social worker or police won't even talk to me or look at my video evidence going back to when I WAS 8 I HAVE OVER 897 VIDEOS OF EVIDENCE IN TOTAL FOR BOTH DAILY ABUSE EVIDENCE CHANNELS .My parents just say I am "hallucinating,delusional,manipulative,lying" the list goes on with excuses they can make.here are the people that are calling me crazy (PRT1 CHANNEL) (MY MOM she is first cause she is the one who got all the diagnoses put on me mostly by her self but with the help of Steven when he eventually came along) czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHxHdpwnsxPLoIc0ySGqo1t2.html (MY DAD🌟) czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHxRDG9ajRU5Np94Xhco5HXW.html (MY MOM'S BOYFRIEND) czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHxvOn_PGnjpgkW0cL5REW56.html (MY SISTER although she is not the cause of the diagnoses and had no say so in it she does try to make it seem like I am the crazy one well plane out lying and that things aren't as bad as i think they are.#gaslighting) czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHzG5KucsJdpwQPsJX4DckQl.html (Videos in correct order prt1 channel) Videos in correct order: czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHzaFRmkDx4pj9Fk0Kq5IVqr.html (THE FILES OF 52 PRT2 CHANNEL) (school situation also the School has noticed red flags recently) School situation: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da-eb5W9k5dOlHxh7LNjJgaE.html (My mom's abuse 2) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9tN6gRiUv2ENfX_9MNOmhZ.html (Steve's abuse 2) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da8lHtFO11rbYZGOi-M6Kv3F.html (My sisters enabling 2) My sisters enabling 2: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da-UcU5yFKr-BTpokm-qgkP3.html (Situation with getting a job so I can save up) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9s_1gFEfK9dtl5LG2KtZy8.html (This is why I have to watch my surroundings the playlist is dedicated To my "family" telling life threatening lies on me) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9jHyjFYnM5mEF1c1x-8QNg.html (The dog situation.Steve's extreme animal abuse.the dog still has it better than me though) 1.czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHwn6Y3z87EWmNfCcYrKDswI.html (steves animal abuse prt2) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da-zvxKtIRTSDqHsrXEWURvG.html (My family says I disrespectful and never clean up 2) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9okWytM9pihLSpXcZIuJfu.html (Prt1) I get accused of never cleaning up or paying attention to how the house looks: czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHzGguacJjuheBZTLNrmpbAb.html (The ongoing lie my mom made up in 2016 that I don't shower) czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da86z7XOV4uTsdkH2_aFye8F.html Steve making a scene outside: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da_3dDSZJ7MG7OExJmjg8PwZ.html (This includes my mom also not just her boyfriend) Steve acting crazy in the car: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da_aGLVkhvxQujnbBdZRCVi_.html
it was already bingo with the first sign, but not the nightmares, but the more severe result of having a comlete insomnia ... that's why I do not speak about C-PTSD, but CTSD - a chronical traumatic stress disorder ... nobody saw what I saw and the others had an easy disclaim on reserve - because I already had determined my high sensitivity and had declared that it was NOT a disorder, but a different type of processing, it was so much easier to insinuate a mental disorder and play down the obvious signs that there had to be a source outside of my control. It was only recently that I became interested in the narcissistic patterns and saw that we are very careless with the not so obvious patterns, certainly when it is a slow process. It was not only the understanding that I had to go back into the burning house (he made me financially codependent), but that he got all the credits and I only got the critique. That's the reason why it is appropriate to speak about a *narcissistic labyrinth* - at a certain point, you are enclosed by 4 walls and don't have the energy to climb over them. When it becomes really dangerous, it becomes clear to you that nobody can help you, the bullies are always three steps ahead of you and when you put the legal decisions on a timeline, you see that every judgement had to support an earlier one - you go deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole. I compare this with being punished by 30 whippings, but, instead of giving them all at once, they give you only one and let you be cured before they give you the next one - it's the expectation that empties you from inside out. I know, what's done can't be undone, but it's time for upper courts starting to use the Humane Codex (you possess your life and only your own life) to reinforce good behaviour. I wanted to get out of the mess, but had no money to pay the ferryman, if you know what I mean.
Ive turned into a crazy person dealing with narc abuse. Lord help me. My emotions are hot and cold and i have to keep the hatred that's in my heart under control. I was messed over!!!!! Yalll pray for me.
I especially loved the ending of this video. Although mine is gone now, since the narcissist was my "father", I have carried this through my whole life (I will be 65 next month). Thank you for helping me let go and to get to know myself the way I knew I always was but wasn't really allowed to. I knew I was right and he was wrong by the time I got into my teens, and I was seriously rebellious, but even taking that into consideration, it really didn't help my psyche as I continued to age because it basically started from birth.
Oh yes, thank you. I so needed this today. A lovely piece of timing. There’s nothing like being reminded of trauma, when you have trauma and are currently in the middle trying to stay relatively sane as your mind breaking is breaking down. Yay yay yay. If you thought you might possibly, but probably not, keeping the glue in place after 60 years of compartmentalised relative success..then ha ha ha bish, good luck with that……’we’re back, just to make sure that we’re still f*cking you over, even tho most of us a dead,good morning.’ And am I going through the bitter and f*cking angry stage of C-PTSD? Too f*cking right. And did it take forever to get here? Also… too f*cking right. And do I even see any point to enduring one more day on this god forsaken planet? Nope. But I’m trying.
O.K. I know I'm on the c-ptsd fringe, It is interesting watching as my words are quickly mocked. I really don't mind, I know what is coming as the stupid can't rule forever.
For myself, Since childhood, My Issue is, that the Narcissist that surrounds me & has since was born, happens to be my Mother, who is and always has been physically, verbally, emotionally and mentally Abusive to Me and my siblings and is whom of which I am Currently living with, while searching for another apartment, Unfortunately. This was the last place I wanted to have to come to, and it has been a living 24/7 nightmare, like I knew it would be, for past few years now, and it has totally brought me down & broken me once again. I Stay in the room I sometimes Sleep in, most of the time I'm awake, and I don't have friends anymore, I don't go anywhere anymore. I have also come to the point of having to barricade my bedroom door for over a year or more now, sadly. It will be a struggle for me, once I leave, to find myself again, but I know it's a struggle worth fighting for and I pray I achieve it again. I need to make my Own Happiness more worth while than like I've always done, which is, Always putting Everyone Else's Happiness first, that's a daily struggle in itself for me, one day the word NO will come outta my mouth way more often than it Currently does. Until then, I'm Now the Girl in the Window up in the Tower of the Evil Witches Castle hidden amongst the forest.
I’m in the process of making sense of my trauma, coming from an overly religious and traditional Mexican household. I first started to regain self awareness when I was 19. Prior to that I kept getting myself into trouble because I would be attracted to people like my abusers (parental figure) I honestly went my entire life thinking everything was normal and it’s just how my traditions are. I never felt safe in my own home. I often feared my family excommunicating me which almost happened when my mom found out I was smoking weed. Psychedelics opened my eyes to my reality. I thank my empathetic abilities for bringing me close to this. I can’t help but wonder where I’d be if it wasn’t for psychedelics. I’m still powering through it and often feel alone because my family has always made me feel less for many reasons. I remember the first time I tried to explain this to my dad. He was insulted that would question his abilities. I’m also in the process of getting an autism diagnosis. I’m 26 and my mom is embarrassed that I would even entertain the thought.
00:00 INTRO
00:21 10 Having Terrifying Dreams Or Flashbacks About The Abuse.
01:06 09 Never Being Able To Relax.
02:01 08 Being Constantly Jumpy And Nervous.
03:02 07 Experiencing Physical Symptoms Or Reactions.
04:02 06 Avoiding Trigger Places, People, Or Activities.
05:01 05 Not Allowing Oneself To Become Vulnerable.
05:52 04 Being Unable To Regulate Emotions.
06:48 03 Having An Overwhelming Preoccupation With Their Abuser.
07:47 02 Feeling An Unshakeable Sense Of Guilt And Shame Over What Happened.
08:38 01 Believing Themselves To Be Unworthy Of Happiness.
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Thank u for Finally explaining extremely well, my type of PTSD. It will help me greatly as I get help. God bless you!
In Love & Light 💗🌟
Was
Ooopooo
How can I get better.
This video helped me a lot in understand how a person gets Borderline Disorder... because of the Narcissist abuse from their parents, or on them.👍
CPTSD sufferers have been hard-wired during the imprint period (in childhood) to abandon their own needs in favour of their abuser's. I had to tell myself that I can't keep setting myself on fire in order to keep others warm before I could convince myself to leave. In the past, every time I tried, I always got hoovered back in by the promise of change or a temporary improvement in their behaviour. The gaslighting can make it hard to trust and open up in the future but I'm so glad I did, there are many beautiful people out there and it's important to try and surround yourself with people who love and support you. Sending healing vibes to all fellow empaths. 💜
@@ZLLi661 I'm so sorry you went through this experience and that you lost your mother. I think maintaining no contact with him is definitely the best course. Stay strong friend.
Like many people both my parents were/are narcissists. Never apologizing and always beating down people around them to feel better about themselves. I've been fortunate to have a lot of good friends that showed me that narcissists are the exception, not the norm. You can't fix a narcissist. They have to try for themselves. The healthiest thing is to keep a lot of distance for both your sakes.
@@ZLLi661 Wow my god. There are so many evil people in this world.. Some people even say these people are obsessed by demons. I know/knew many bad people who treated me wrong all the time too, sadly they will always find a victim but not me anymore. Your story is heart breaking and i bet these people will get their karma.
It's worse when your father is a narc and my life a living hell
.
The difference between CPTSD and PTSD is that with CPTSD, your core belief about yourself has been altered for the worse. Even after you've physically separated yourself from the narc, you still suffer and self-sabotage because of the distorted perspective that your abuser has made you believe about yourself. What really helped my hyper awareness is exercise. I think it's because it changed my breathing and it helped me live in the moment. I imagine yoga and meditation would also have the same effect. Also, it really helps get rid of those stress hormones (adrenaline, cortisol) and replaces them with endorphins. I wish all survivors of this insidious type of abuse extended periods of genuine happiness and bliss.
I swim. Long distance. Open water. Saved me. Grounded me. When a therapist diagnosed my ex as a covert, I read the #1 thing to do was guard your health. Apparently lots of targets get sick and die, or commit suicide. We need a functioning mental health care system for all.
@@AGenerationJones That's so cool. I love open water diving. I haven't gotten to do it much in recent years since I live in a city but I'd love to get back into it. I'm glad you're doing well. I hope your journey is blessed with healing and happiness.
Thank you xxxx you too x
@@julietcrowson3503 💓
great idea - and thank you for confirming what i silently felt about the core belief - something i tackle everyday
When you’ve been traumatized over years, from a very early age, terror is woven into everyday life, so that almost anything can be a trigger. It’s so confusing, because you’re just going about your life, and suddenly, you feel overwhelmed and terrified, for no apparent reason. Dissociative amnesia occurs when I encounter triggering situations. I simply cannot remember that the event ever happened. It’s a protective mechanism, but when I first realized what was happening, I wondered what else I couldn’t remember. This is a trauma response, and even though it’s scary, it’s not abnormal in such situations. What we experience after being subjected to long-term trauma are normal responses to monstrous experiences.
You articulated this very well.
EXACTLY! My friend is always asking me what's wrong I can't explain what the fuck is wrong with me. After every second, something triggers me and my stomach starts hurting i feel nauseous and i feel like crying. I hate this so much it's hard being this way at a young age oooooffff it doesn't feel good. What's the point in living, what if i died tomorrow? Would my parents realize their wrong? Would my bff break down? Would my brother be worried? Would my bullies even care at all? 😭💔 Sometimes i look at a knife and wonder what it'd be like to shove it as hard as fuck into my chest.
@@Killua_Zoldyck3407 Write everything down. It's safe to let it go when it's on paper. You don't need to remember all the things you want to say or discribe, right now. I have written my whole life. The trauma even ruined my ability to spell, to express myself. Still, being able to deal with your own thoughts after you are calm, in a better state of mind is going to help you to make sence of your life. You do need to talk to a person that can give you feedback. 1 visit to a counselor in the 7th grade changed my life. I told him about my fathers abuse. The counselor told me that my father was sick and there was nothing wrong with me. 50 years later, my Parents needed me. Hell became my life again. My abuser now was both my father and brother as they also abused Moma. See, you need to get this lesson figured out! You don't want to relive it!
Forgot to mention, I did have a few abusive Bfs. Sorry if I am not a good writer. I care about you, you are hurting too much. Take Care.
I'm so relieved to see those words... thank you kind soul. For so long u feel alone It was all a mind game for a sick individual. I thank God for sparing me, my life and my children. Those were some very scary situations I was in. I'm so very grateful and blessed 🙌
Yes ma'am. I actually can't remember anything from before I was 13, but a lot of things set me off. Sometimes I've wondered if I were crazy because of the smallest things that can cause a panic attack or that will make my happy go lucky mood change to defensive pissed off faster than the speed of light.
I rarely dream, but do have emotional flashbacks, cannot trust anymore
Finally a video that makes sense. CPTSD from NPD mother. Traumatized as a child, re-victimized over and over again in relationships for 30+ years. It's ok to be alone now.
I agree. I'm fine chillin by myself w my cat😂❤
@@daniaannme too
Glad for you that you discovered what was going on !! Pretty much the same here. Malignant narcs are the worst. You have to deal with 'm for years and after that you have to deal with the issues they cause, for longer than you've known them-- . It sucks...
Hope you are recovering well. I took up surfing. Wasn't THAT much fun at first and wanted to quit but it's starting to work its magic on me. There's probably something out there for you as well, what ever it may be ! 😀
I have cats ❤
Hang in there, Kiddo’; you’re not alone!
I literally said to myself, "you have gone through hell and survived" !!!
Thank you for the push 💗
Kuddos!!!!!
Reading this gave me goosebumps! I always say "Wow Im a Walking Miracle!!!"
"Mother, tell your children not to walk my way, tell your children not to hear my words, what they mean what they say, Mother"
I here you big time hagn in there
My therapist keeps reminding me I’ve been abused. I’m like but I’m still here so it couldn’t have been that bad
@@spiegeltnDanzig is a great band
I agreed with it till the end when he said”let the narcissist know you are bruised but far from broken “…
I disagree- don’t let the narcissist know 💩 lol
If you have successfully detached from a narcissist, don’t tell them ANYTHING about how you feel or think. PERIOD.
if you can manage it, don’t talk to them AT ALL.
Breaking all contact PERMANENTLY tells them exactly that. And it drives the message home in the harshest way possible.
agree 100%
Don't tell them. Show them.
Xxxx🩷🩷🩷
Exactly. Write them off & go no contact
I can’t even write a coherent comment..nine years of abuse.. I’m destroyed.. every point is me.. I’m so broken.
This is what my family did to me. I lost my child and my friends because an elder thought it was a good idea to teach me a lesson. The lies and comparing was getting to be a bit much. The bad thing is, she doesnt believe she did anything wrong. May her sister handle her.
It's a shame when your own family does it to you. And because they have no conscience so they don't believe they've done anything done
I also have CPTSD same situation. It does suck. Triggers seem to be everywhere these days. Prayers and Love to all. May Christ Keep Us Strong, Safe and give us the Peace beyond understanding that you have Promised.
Amen 🤍
Amen 🙏
My pastor mentions the end times every week during the preach. This gives me anxiety and it causes overwhelm and overthinking. Does this happen to you also?
@@TJBear ~ while it is good to preach on that topic, it shouldn't be the only subject he teaches on. I would suggest reading from the Psalms every day. I also believe that born again believers will be raptured to Christ and will not experience what the rest of the world will endure. We will be enjoying the benefits of Heaven with no more abuse, no more pain, no more anxiety! God bless you TJ! I will be praying for you!!
Amen
This is me. I cannot believe it some days . I can’t believe this confirmed my abuse and what I suffer from today all in a video.
I know but we are what God said and not the abuse remember jesus Christ is always with you and he taught you through the abuse not to be the abuse much love and light
@@aprilyoung3903 ..Amen Sis ! To quote Todd White - ' Don't allow the sin done against you - become the sin - in you.' ;)
Suggest getting professional therapy sooner than later. If this hangs on it can definitely get worse, much worse. Isolation, depression, lack of trust in new relationships and a general flat line of your personality. No, I'm not a doctor, I know from experience.
@@nickf9392 the Dr couldn't help me ,I did it on my own don't need professional help
@@aprilyoung3903 Excellent, have a nice week end!
55 years of trauma was finally cured by listening to frequency music, bi-neural tones. It was a bumpy ride and it took 3 years but it was worth it!
Just start by saying 'I forgive myself' and the mind will do the rest, trust me!
Also, what helped me was the realisation that I was addicted to my own stress hormones!
Crazy I know but it was true.
I had been living with stress for so long that my body had become addicted to the chemicals stress produced.
Always putting myself in stressful situations and not understanding why???
That revelation really helped.
Also, pass the judgment over to God. It's God's business now. He/Karma will deal with it. Love and light to us all. Good luck! Xxx
It's been years and I'm still not recovered from the abuse.. I can't even be me, the real me.. I'm so guarded I can't be around people without thinking that everyone is going to abuse me all over again
I actually have a high pain tolerance…but very low tolerance to stimuli. I was told I don’t have PTSD but severe case of C-PTSD and that’s hurtful. I don’t like being around people for too long. Everyone has the ability to trigger me. Isolation for now is best since I was diagnosed with MS.
Me as well. Physical pain is doable. Emotional pain still scars and haunts me.
I send you love
I have my own hypothesis about MS and would love to connect with you because of this thing we have in common. You don't need MS ... Do you want it?
Me too ms, c-ptsd
@@sonialawton4010 I remember how I felt a year ago. This moment. Wishing you the best! Life does get better…but the MS well hopefully you’re pushing through it! 🧡
What are you doing empaths???what are you doing??Rise up from crows!!crows are only for dead food!!Rise up,take your power back,take responsibilities of you!!remaining on these pathological badly treated behaviours??Who are they??Who are they??Rise up ,turn the page of your life,make a new beginning!!it is evident!!stay humble,be courageous,be silent but be strong,too strong inside you!!you have to see their stepping back soon!!with commitment,with patience, with clear mind,with honesty,with presence!!❤️❤️🌟✌️
This is a very good general overview to share with people who are around the person who's been abused to this state, to perhaps help them understand better. Most, unknowingly, contribute more trauma to the already broken down self perspective of a person who's isolated, often socially challenged after years of isolation and gaslighting, and seeking someone to see them after all that they've been through, yet are often met with more invalidation.
excellent comment ! agree 100% especially with the social isolation
I have copied your words to my journal, so very real! Thank you. Invalidation.. like a bad conversation no matter what you say, you are bested and invalidated by THEIR more valid experience. Also jealousy. The neglected, abused and invalidated child is abused for their beauty, body, brains, achievements, talents. I find it hard to realise that my own achievements are not celebrated but derided. You would think they'd be proud of you as it increases their standing, but no. They hate and attack. Zero contact for 23 yrs now, have left them behind, but still suffer in social situations, hyper vigilant to any disrespect towards me.
So true, sadly. This awareness needs to spread.💜
🎯
Never being able to relax. That hit home. Went to doctor today. Do find some relief in knowing I'm not alone
I educated myself on my abuse meditated listen to music journaled slowly found myself with alone time everyday and only responded to him if it had to deal with the kids it's been a long hard road but I can honestly say iv had more peace and happiness now ❤️
Here! I was diagnosed years ago as being bipolar but in the past year while working with professionals diagnosed as have PTSD and a highly sensitive person. So genetics and the environment we are all raised both play parts in our development. I’ve been labeled many things through life. I dislike labels on one hand but in the other hand it helps me understand more about myself and become a better me. I used to think it was just a burden but as I age I find peace and safety in the personality I’ve been given and can see lessons in my trails. I feel blessed and feel less of a need to fit in find those I have even more valuable.
Many times persons with c-ptsd, ptsd, are mislabeled as bi-polar.
I'm not sure, but I'm leaning this way. In fact, I'm wondering if a narcissist wasn't involved in my diagnosis, now. I don't know. My diagnosis, and original problems, etc. Came when I was single, though. Before my first relationship. So, it's really not possible. Though, I'm sure that problems from relationships that were caused to fail didn't help my situation, they aren't at all my primary issue.
Good points here. I can relate to being bipolar
My story Exactly ✔️
maybe you're just loopy
The problem with narcissists is their emotions and desires are so LOUD it drowns out your own thoughts and feelings and swallows you up.
To live a life alone is so appealing to me.
I’ve had two conventional doctors in my life, to remind me at the end, “Dana, you’re an empath.”
What they’ve always said without words : “why are you with him”
I have recently ended my 12 year relationship with a narcissist. He ended up isolating me away(over 1200mi) from everyone(friends , family, and then any coworker I would get close to.) He would say things like..."What are you telling them about me now(when he was the furthest thing of being the topic of our conversation.) Or you care about them more than you do me(when all I did was work and come home.)" It was cool for me to work 12 to 16hr a day to support us(cuz he refused to work-cuz he was "sick & dying.") Meanwhile, come to find out he wanted me at work(without a vehicle, or when I had one, wanted me to let him know when Ieft work), cuz he was hooking up with the neighbor methhead, prostitute(literally), along with at least 20 other women. When I found out everything and he could no longer deny it or manipulate me, he exploded. He sold our house, everything in it, and took off with our vehicle-leaving me stranded and homeless within 12 days. He had been in Florida(having an affair with his mother's 60+ year old hairdresser), which has become his next victim, for 4 months. He had been telling me his gma was dying and he had to take care of her or the state would come after him. I guess he thought I was dumb too. I studied family law for years in the state of FL. I told him that he needed to come home and face me like a man, see my face and the damage he did to me. Well he did, doing what I mentioned as soon as he got there. Meanwhile, crying, begging, & pleading with me to forgive him, that he loved me, etc. I literally laughed at him. Telling him someone that loves someone doesn't do the things you did to a person. I moved back home to South FL last August. It's me and my kitty baby. That's it will ever be from here on out. Ppl try saying...In time you'll be in another relationship. Ummmm, NO, I WONT! The abuse he put me through and what I endured from him, I will live and be alone for the rest of my days. I NEVER want to experience that again. The only way to make sure that doesn't happen is for me to be alone. I work and come home. I don't trust anyone. I've also realized the narcissistic abuse began with my mother. I left home at 15 because of it. Unfortunately, I subjected myself to numerous abusive relationship because of it.
@@tiffanythomas5750 I don't blame you. I finally found my Husband. But I actually had a written list of what I would not have in my life! It's been 25 years together. But if I lose him, I will be content with my dogs. Get some good hobbies. Working with your hands and the earth is good♡
It is wonderful & peaceful at times. Im glad i am alone everyday forever, by my choice
I have almost recovered from most of these symptoms. Thanks to my family especially my 4 year old adorable and playful nephew. Spending time with him kept me busy and creative. He, unknowingly, restored my mental health, filled my life with happiness. I pray fervently everyday to quite my mind of any negative thought. Thank God my family and friends are my greatest supporters. God bless you all. 🙏
Jesus pulled me out of this nd bcoz of him i m born again.Although insomnia still hits me sumtimes.
Rest on his peace. May God bless you
try taking melatonin at night it helped me relax.
Jesus is the truth, the way and the life. So happy for you. He has given me the love and peace no doctor, treatment or medication could.
Jesus is the only reason I’m still alive😢
This is 100% me. I ticked every box. I'm still suffering as a result of what my abuser did to me, almost 2 years later.
This is so me..have neurological issues mixed with depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts.
I’m sorry 😢 please ask for professional help you deserve peace and happiness. What can I do to help?
Me too!
God bless and be with you! I can relate. I’m over the suicidal thoughts. Anxiety has become a lot more manageable. Still deal with depression more often than I would like. I think exercising and journaling most definitely helped. Even making sure I have enough vitamin D daily helps a lot. I had a life coach speaking to her helped a lot as well. I’m 37 and just understanding what’s happened to me… it definitely got worse over time, not better. I wish I had gotten some form of therapy much sooner in my adulthood. I was trying to manage it with alcohol smh.. worked for a while, but over time it only made it worse. Hang in there as hopeless as it feels at times you can put in the work to get to a more stable place. Definitely takes time, patience and determination. My kids have been my biggest source of strength to keep pushing forward and I am determined to live the life I deserve. I truly wish you the best.
Thank you. My heart truly hurts from so much abuse. I've had PTSD since I was 9 when my father passed away unexpectedly. 54 now and Im pretty sure my mother is a narcissist. A lifetime of this. I feel saness for people I don't know but want to share there life's with me. I overwhelmed and now just hide and stay t myself. . I don't want hurt anymore.
@Honey Booboo thank you for your words. I feel the same as Patricia Johnson.
Yep!
@Honey Booboo definitely believe removing certain people makes the progress easier
Does anyone else feel lonely and unhappy with being empathic?
Yep we suffer the most! 😳
@@tashaequeen8935 do you find solace in nature? The older I get the more I'm finding I want to isolate myself
@@lotus6268 yes it's scary to and sometimes I don't feel like living I'm just that tired..my heart is so sore..but God got us..
@@tashaequeen8935 I'm tired of being scared I'm tired of knowing what people think and feel... Do I have to build a wall around myself? Or shall I shine so brightly that only good genuine people can come near me 🤔.... I'm not religious but I guess everyone has there own version of the almighty..
Yes
I use to believe I was unworthy of happiness spent 25yrs fighting narcissist parents and siblings when I confronted them they backed of real quick...all thanks to the love and support of my soon to be wife who's never let me down from the day I met her,
Great you have an Allie with open eyes👀
The only reason an empath can experience PTSD is when they themselves dont know that they're super sensitive and how to handle energies around them. I suffered from PTSD and later depression just because a person who sat next to me, he was a pervert and tried to molest me. But just this little incident, just because i absorbed his energy caused PTSD and depression for 6-7 long years. I am completely healed now and know how empowered i am and so is each one of you.
Sad when you realize you have almost all these symptoms. I specifically have trauma nightmares and flashbacks, avoiding triggers, emotional dysregulation, intense shame and guilt, and ruminating about my abuser and obsessed with why they treated me this way.....
Yah, how lucky we are. Our lives could have been so much more? ...I said, “Could have.” It depends on the empath & severity of their C-PTSD. I just thought I could do anything in life. I just didn’t see people this ugly & selfish. It has been & is my biggest struggle. Trying to live (work) day to day & not show any emotion when triggered by clients or customers. Its so hard. I move forward all alone in my life. Its best this way.
Me too! I replied to someone else's comment on this thread of my experience. NOONE SHOULD EVER GO THROUGH & ENDURE WHAT I DID!!! I WILL NEVER EVER BE IN ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP AGAIN! I go to work, make my money, and come home. It's me and my big cat(he is my world.) I've decided to become an old cat lady. I have friends and acquaintances. Well really one good friend that I've known for 35 years. She begged me to leave him for years. I tried, but he pulled me back in every time. The others in my life(coworkers, customers, old friends thay I haven't seen in years-due to him isolating me from everyone), have no idea where I live, work, etc. I keep everyone at an arm's length distance now. I will not risk ever enduring that again.
@@tiffanythomas5750 I totally understand you. I have also decided now to draw away from lots of people if I can. I had a husband for 20 years, ....after divorce I quickly got married again,5 years so far, but he is a similar type of personality like the first husband( very controlling and abusive,maybe more clever) .I gave him all my trust (stupid me) only to find out it was a mistake. He just gathered information to use it against me. I left him ,we are 1 year separated now but he wants me to come back. Everything in me says No. But I got to see him once more to collect my things from his house. I need extra prayers on that day. I only left with a suitcase.
I am lucky I still have kids,they are my world. And they are with me. They kept a connection to their father from my first marriage.. But they understand now much more of Abuse. I hope they will choose the proper spouses when they grow up. I decided I don't want a man anymore in my life. I need peace more than anything
@@swissherbgirl2917 I understand wanting your things. However, you've gone a year without it already. Is it truly worth it? I have all of my exes things. He took off after selling our home, leaving everything behind. He is also back in FL, but is about an hr and 20min from where I am. He harassed me about his things and wanting them. To me if they meant that much to him, he wouldn't have left them behind. He kept asking where I lived. I told him the general area which huge and has a couple million ppl in the area. I offered to get a storage unit for a week. Saying, I'd bring all his stuff there and he could retrieve afterwards. He didn't want that. It was just an excuse to try to see and manipulate me again. If u really have to go...bring someone with u.
@@tiffanythomas5750 yea my kids want to move back to the same city and collect their things. Let's see what we get. I hope he stays calm
I had cptsd from npd parents. Now, it’s back since breaking up with a guy who has npd. I’m effed up from the abuse. I cannot describe that as a relationship, more like being prey for a predator. It wasn’t until I was discarded that I even knew what npd is.
Palina Prasasouk •
Unfortunately your story is oh so familiar hunny.
Take good care of yourself & stay focused on doing what brings you most joy & happiness in your life. Learn to meditate & practice mindfulness & Self Love techniques. Be patient & trust your gut instincts always.
You've got this!!! 💛💝😍
This same thing happened with me and went on for 7½ years until I was discarded by my now ex. She left at 1:30am new years this year so 1/1/22 and it's now end of April and I'm barely getting a tiny bit comfortable to be around anyone now. And that's pushing it. I feel for you, it really is something I never knew about either until I started researching what the hell was happening to me and discovered all of this. 7½ years too late though unfortunately. And I had known this girl for 9 years before we decided to even date...so what I thought was an amazing friendship then turned relationship of 16-17 years in total...to nothingness and a complete waste.
Yes 🙏🏽🙌💯✊🏽
What is npd?
You are blessed to be discarded. They don't set free ppl that easily.
Common myth is nightmares repeating like a movie. If you have ptsd your more likely having nightmares with holes or most commonly feelings and emotions tied to those things. You can have dreams about say spiders that kicks you flight freeze or fight emotions. Dreams don't have to be a repeat of the situation, but a repeat of the feelings experienced. Your more likely to have flashbacks or reminders to triggers.
I can, unfortunately, relate! You’ve also explained a lot I didn’t understand. I have not help produce children due to the fear that I could never be a good parent. I was called too sensitive, among other things, and still struggle to this day. Thanks for sharing this information.
Sometimes sensitive people are the best parents! Obviously, they didn't really know you calling you so sensitive! Don't believe the propagation! All the best moving forward! ❤
Same here. I never had children either
Oh my God, you have no idea how hard this was for me to watch. I really really struggled to get through this, stopping and breathing many times. I am in a very DV situation on top of everything else and this was too much.
EDIT I literally cried and tried to hold back this entire video. *THIS IS ONE OF THE HARDEST VIDEOS I'VE EVER SUBJECTED MYSELF TO.....Because if this is true, I'm NOT crazy, and the abuse is more real than I can emotionally handle* , and that's *TERRIFYING* .. I'm a worthless PoS, and I don't deserve to be, nor have I earned the luxury, to be happy. Some of us are just too far gone, and that's a reality that toxic positivity preachers have to learn. Some of us are truly 100% *ALONE IN THIS WORLD.*
I'm very sorry to read these words from you! My heart hurts to think that you truly believe this about yourself. Please know that you're at least not 100% alone, I'll try and be here to help, even if it's just to listen... My thoughts and prayers are with you! God bless.
Plz stop thinking like that,your gaslighting your own self.Start with change the way you think about yourself.
It's been almost a year since your comment.I hope your feeling better about yourself now.
You absolutely are mistaken to believe those things about yourself. There's so much out there, you have to have enough faith that you can reach some of those things and take control of your life. Get counseling and if it doesn't seem to help get another counselor. Counselors are free in most municipalities, depending on income. Take a few steps. That's how you start. Get out of the house more. Get away from abusers. Don't believe their cruel verbal garbage which they fling at sensitive people because they themselves are such insecure losers who want to control and gaslight to feel better about themselves. You were not born to be abused or tormented. Understand that and get help to move towards freedom. You can recover. Been there and still working on it.
I think the hardest thing is to learn (relearn) that it's not you. You didn't do anything wrong. It wasn't your fault. And then break the cycle of abuse (ie go from Narcissist parents to Narcissist partner.)
My mother survived divorce from one alcoholic narcissist pnly to be "rescued" by another. She didn't know what a healthy relationship was like because her father shut down after a family tragedy and was emotionally dead -- and became an alcoholic(!).
My mother got me counseling at a very young age because I was quiet, sad, distant. My male role models were sick. My best and only friend in high school was a narcissist, I now realize.
My stepfather found a bigger narcissist than he was after my mom died. She made him her victim and took everything. He was vicious toward us kids to the end.
I always thought *I* was the emotionally sick one.
Watch out for that trap.
I was my dad with dementia’s only caregiver for 6 years. My dad was the most kind gentleman I’ve ever known. He became the total opposite! Violent, abusive, delusional, and paranoid. I was just diagnosed with caregiver PTSD
I'm sorry you went through this experience. It sounds very hard.
❤️🙏🌹 Wishing you good things now xx
I admire your heart strength.
@@carolcasey5441 thank you for your very kind words ☮️💗🙏
Most of all I hate sleeping because I can't stand having dreams of my son that she took from me and has not let my see in 2 years.
Stay strong, brother. It is always darkest before the dawn, and the tides are turning in the spiritual way. I wish you the best in your future endeavors.
Go to court fight for them kids I had to take it there. Let your son know you’re fighting for him . She twist his brain to hate you even if you explain to him ur tried. Get the LAW Ain’t No Bitch over the law.
@@ASE_Avenue well it's more complicated than that because she has got me in so much trouble I will likely get more time. She threw the cops at me again after we split and her new guy was accusing her of seeing me. I want even talking to her. She just did it to pull him in and show that she's over me and to get me at the same time and Im not on the birth certificate because we had a n.c.o. when he was born. I'm pretty much at her mercy. She an evil genius and planned this the whole time and even told me and used it to threaten me and keep me in abusive relationship. The court just takes the females side and with my priors and no money for a decent lawyer I don't think there's any chance to get them to accept the truth that I'm the victim. She has done far more I just never reported anything.
She had been f****** with me since her first child. She told me it was my kid and then right before she had it disappeared and got married to some other guy and it ended up not being my kid and I was stupid and got back with her and she said that she wanted to have a kid with me and then she's going to love me forever and all this stuff and we all know how that goes. So there's a chance to kid might not even be mine I mean it looks like me but the other guy she was seeing also looks similar.
The best thing you can do is get your shit together and be calm. Project yourself into the future, and who you want to be - who this child will need.
This is so true !! I'm living on my survival mode all the time . Walking on egg shells . Watching my words . Being very careful and living on my nerves constantly. . My gut feeling hadn't let me down yet .! .
So now I know why I am why I am. . . I have every single one of those symptoms. It's awful. . I can't watch tv cos tv triggers it off. .I can't go home to my place of birth cos of triggers and flashbacks . . Being c-ptsd makes life hard . Emotionally and physically so I hermitise . I shut myself away from life . I isolate . .
@@tinajennings1202 omg .same 🥺🙌
@@tinajennings1202 Don't worry dear, Jesus will heal all the wounds. Hugs💛🤗
Yes this is a response of our bodies and mind to protect us. I know that after some time with therapy and a 12 step recovery program we can, at times lower our guard. I started trying this out alone in my house. I would say to my self " I am safe here, I am alone and no one can hurt me in this moment" I kept adding more time to this practice. I then walked around the block and had no triggers thank god . We can heal. We are good people. We deserve good things, great things In life. Bless you and keep moving forward. z
No one has ever explained my life with this level of accuracy. Thank you so much for making this video. It revealed why I feel so stuck in my journey towards healing from narcissistic abuse. I always ponder about what happened and it has become a habit. I should stop it now. Also narcissist is not my standard. I am yet to discover who I am and define my own standards. Once again thank you.♥️
My ex GF gave me second hand PTSD, she would tell me stories of her past lovers and the abuse she received endlessly! I started to realise she was doing it to hurt me. She would tell horrific stories that broke me then when I tried to help her or comfort her she would push me away and act like I was being overbearing. She would tell the same stories over and over in gory detail and always chose the stories that she knew bothered me the most, I just wanted to help her so badly but never could. I have nightmares about the things I heard! I loved her so much but she broke me and now I can't move on and I'm too scared to start any new relationship now. 😒
If she is a narc she lied to you
🙏🏽🙌💯✊🏽
Lol i have the same story . My ex gf was the most evil person ive seen in my life. The gashliting was crazy brother i feel you.
I survived 20 years of 2 narcissist relationships, but after this video I realize that mentally am not where I want to be or even emotionally,
So very true… I’ve been living in autopilot for almost a year… when will the thoughts and pain end.
Only you can end it. YOU have too learn more about the real you and take time too cultivate quiet seas . I had a thought every morning what gear am I in and what can I do too bring it down good 👍
Matthew, I understand that.
Recognize unhealthy thoughts and change your reaction or response to them. For example, I struggled with this one in particular "I miss the person they used to be, they can't possibly be all bad right?" Recognize that thought and replace it with "That person was not real and their unacceptable behavior negates whatever good I saw in them." You literally have to change the rhetoric of your internal monologue. Takes a lot of practice. You have to convince yourself that this is the truth... Because it IS. Sending 💕
It’s important to force yourself to embark on self care, start small, make sure you are eating well and getting enough sleep. And learn about yourself and your traumas, it’s the most empowering way to move through the dark time. Good luck xo
@@ncoast9111 good advice - thank you
Some days I'm good and others I'm completely lost and completely lost and confused. Wondering why I didn't leave b4 I was thrown away and wondering why I ignored all of the red flags. The gaslighting and the push pull dynamic. It's been almost 3yrs since it ended and I'm still trying to fund a way to heal and get through it.
Welcome to the reality of the “show”, it’s textbook their behaviors and our destruction. I am 3 years out and finding my good days are more than my bad. I am big on the own your own part mentality. I overlooked things being off, believed Love and example concurs all! I have a new, well earned mindset. Evil is evil, there are those who desire to serve such. I am not one of those. I wish/pray you healing and restoration. As with Iron when broken and welded back in place, that becomes its strongest point! Sending Hope your way….🌸🎯
So accurate. I feel like Jesus just carried me across sand.
Yes. I periodically blame myself. I knew my “friend” was bad. I knew something was off. But I blue thru all the red flags for35 yrs simply because she was ‘fun’.
I also blame myself. Doesn't matter that my brain knows that he is totally evil, still I have some very strong bond towards him and always come forward the feeling that it is my fault and blame and ruin myself....its a so much deep pain...
@@eszterzsolnai9209 trauma bond
@@johnd.2803 How do you mean this, could you explain please?
@@eszterzsolnai9209 the bond you feel toward them is from a trauma bond… maybe… look up up info about
@@johnd.2803 I quicly checked it but no. In the first period he was very nice with me. Gave me a lot of compliments. We talked a lot and shared with each other a lot of personal things, mutually. This period created a strong bond inside me towards him.
But after this he started a triangulation, mentioning and appreciating that other woman did hurt me so much. And when I showed it to him he said that it is not normal, its a "red flag" from me, and started to ignore my messages and me...
I've gotten over most of these. I have a great psychologist, and I'm realizing I'm most likely not an INFJ. I notice patterns. I noticed the narc's patterns and I did not buy into a lot of it. Perhaps I'm an INTP, because I notice my own patterns as well. These are, of course, personal patterns. The difficulty I am still dealing with, is the inability to regulate emotions, at least, to a certain extent. But, yes. Even that is getting better. Just give yourself your own space, I never look back, and I'm so-o-o-o glad I left--never going back.
I am an ENFJ, and know that being with a Narcissist “jacked” up my old self…. Getting back to my Protagonist ways, but with better boundaries. Wishing you well, joy, and peace. I have taken up new hobbies, and am trying not to look back at the prior destructive force which I allowed to change me. My life is MINE to live and I’m damn determined to live My Best Life, that is the best outcome for all of us🌸🙌
Although I am emphatic, I have harnessed it and have brought narcissists to emotional turmoil and tears and confusion in my stoicism.
I guess I just found out I have C-PTSD. Half surprised, half not surprised. My biggest problems are an inability to relax, though I’m getting better at it, and getting stuck thinking about WHY. I’m learning more about my abuser and none of it is good. I wish I could cut my mother some slack, but she really did my head in with all her BS.
Wow. This is me. Every word. I've been diagnosed for a little over 2.5 years. My first trauma series of events began when I was 13 (sexual and emotional abuse by a close family relative that was also a narcissist- he was married to my narcissistic mother. Nothing was ever good enough- grades, my weight (I was an average sized teenager, even my friends- if I made a new friend and let's say had a sleepover like most kids do, as soon as the friend would leave, they'd rip them apart like I was hanging out with the dregs of society. Nevermind that they were honor students, extremely talented athletes, or the most important one- that they genuinely cared about me. My biological dad was my escape. He was my best friend- my parents divorced when I was 3. I never bonded with my mother, but my dad was everything to me. He was an empath too. So we related and understood each other. I visited him as much as possible even going against the custody orders. For some sick reason, noone told me he was sick, I had no idea that he was dying and on borrowed time til the last 2 weeks of his life when my mom and I went to where he was in the hospital, for 3 days, I hung out with him in his room, he'd scoot over in bed so we could watch TV together. Then on the 4th day, he made the final turn and was on a ventilator for 9 days. I still had no idea he was dying. I thought he was in for something minor. So walking into his room and seeing him on life support was one of the worst things I've ever seen from an emotional standpoint. I didn't know if I'd ever see his eyes open again. He had the most beautiful blue eyes I'd ever seen. He also had a terrible stutter- think like Mel Tillis the country singer. But I never viewed it as a "disorder", to me it actually him apart from other dads. He was so kind, and funny, and loving to everyone. I dream about him alot. He passed at 45 years old. I'm 46 and it still feels fresh. My escape and my happy place were gone when he passed 4 days after my 15th birthday. I actually hate my birthday because it takes me back to turning 15 and I know what comes next. By the way. I told my mom what was going on with my stepdad after the first time, she didn't believe me and even said "if its true. you probably did something to instigate it" at 13, in 1988, we didn't wear skimpy clothes, I never did because my mom and stepdad were obsessed with my weight- they equated it to my worth- like a washer or dryer at a scratch and dent store on discount. Image and status was everything. By the time I was 20, I couldn't take it at my parents house between a drunk stepfather that was chasing me around the house when my mom wasn't around , to the constant fights every day between them or both against me, I had to get out and start a life somewhere. I'd been dating someone about a 8 months, we moved in together, my parents drama abuse made me not focus on this guy.
I let alot slide rather than seeing him for what he was- a MONSTER. I've only referred to him as The Devil since I escaped after 4 years of some of the worst abuse- physical, sexual, and mental warfare and gas lighting. Noone ever looked for me. I may have only seen my parents once a year and I wasn't allowed to have friends- they'd divert from him, yes. Seriously. I made peace every day that I might not wake up. He did things to smother, asphyxiate, and strangle me til I'd pass out.
I had to accept that this was how I'd get out as in died. I'd never seen them at all button pererfect and finally going to me dying and just accept and disconnect from myself. I finally left in 1999 after being held at knife point for about 12 hours because I told him I was leaving and just let me go. He tore up EVERY stich of clothing, shoes, and even down to undergarments. I only had some pj's on so I waited for him to get to sleep and then I left. I had to drive over an hour and a half over to my parents house but I couldn't shake the guy stalked me for over a year. He died of rectal and Colon cancer about 2 months ago it was the happiest and most cathartic moment I've ever had. Happy that I was no longer watching out for him but cathartic because everything that he'd done came back at once. 4 years of all 3vtypes of abuse daily. I was 20 when it started. 24 when it ended. I'm 46. That's how long I've still been looking over my shoulder. The trauma that'
came back made me reevaluate the situation. I don't even remember the day we met. But if there really is a hell, I hope they've started to bust out the big shit that they save for special cases, because he certainly had me in hell on earth.
Narcissist psychopaths have an instinct to find people like us who have been abused. They actively look and find us. Somehow we give off that vibe that we've been abused and they pick up on it. They sure seem to find me
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I hope you found happiness in your life. May happiness and good luck shine over you.
@@wandabanks6756 that's so true. I think I have sucker written on my forehead.
@sophieallen6334 I have. Sometimes it takes walking away and realizing that we do have worth and that the only person who can truly love us the way we need to be loved is ourselves. I'm very careful about who I keep in my inner circle. We CAN choose our own families. Maybe not by blood, but definitely as far as a support system.
My mother was and still is my narcissistic abuser. At 83 she still hasn't forgotten how to be a complete narcissist to me. She's evil to the core.
I'm so glad someone has finally done a video that covers CPTSD and being an empath. It's a totally different playing field than just being one or the other. Trying to blend the two together, even with years of therapy can be extremely tricky.
Thank you so much for this great video. One thing I love is that your closed caption sticks around a bit longer than any other video. It helps me because as a person with ADHD I have to really focus, especially while trying to think straight because of this nasty, miserable, Covert Narcissistic man that I am dealing with. It's not a healthy relationship. He is very bad for me. I need to get out of this house because it's more work to get by everyday by just being cordial to him. Everything is work and stress for me and he won't cooperate with me on anything. He will torture me mentally and more so emotionally. He will provoke me and he will blame me for anything he can gets his hands on. I am tired of this bulls-t. I want to move on and grow. I have grown and changed a bit because I see so much of his deliberate nonsense going on and stand up for myself and I will say how I feel and stand my ground. He acts like I am supposed to be with him forever and should heal him, fix him and take his sh-t all the time and he puts so much stress on me that everything is my duty in the relationship. Please pray for me. Thanks again.
Please also get therapy.
As you can see there is a growing community of support. Id suggest you reach out and plan your escape as being around narcs is highly harmful including to you and can lead to you being exploited and severe mental health issues.God will help you and take your problems from you, so we'll all pray for peace and peace of mind XXX take care xxx
@@julietcrowson3503
Try finding a therapist or doctor that knows about Narcissism. They couldn't understand the detail of the behavior for the life of them. Where do you see a sign that says therapy that specializes in Narcissistic abuse? I haven't seen one in 4 years after educating myself about Narcissists and in my case the Covert Narcissist man that tears your insides out. Luckily I survived from sinking down to the bottom of the sea and him tormenting me down to make me go there again. Nice help I got from therapist's that said rethink your marriage blah blah blah and that's what almost made me do myself in because not one mentioned his behavior and recognizing it after explaining this over and over to one therapist after another.
@@nd612 - Narcissism is psychology 101. I found a therapist who specializes in narc abuse by using the Google search. Didn't like her - she pushed my buttons. I needed someone to be gentle and freaking accept me after all the $hi- I'd been through. Ended up going to a community health therapist. She was great. Also started working on my trauma with a peer support person. She is AMAZING. Now I'm working with a private therapist who specializes in trauma. I really like her. She's calming, soothing.
@@julietcrowson3503
Thank you.
See you tube channels
Dr. Ramani (Durvasula) plus she hosts webinars
Surviving Narcissism channel by Dr. Les Carter
Watch them so you know what therapists are crap.
This is all true..my narcisstic ex wife of 31 years..always had affairs some I found out about but there were many I could never prove but she always wanted to give me enough signs to show me that she was cheating while lying till she was blue in the face saying she wasn't..knowing she was tearing me up inside....certain songs,words,places etc take me right back and relive that pain. It happens weekly..i felt forced to go live alone and not bother with people.. I thought I was alone feeling this way but listening to these videos made me realize I'm not.. They tear you down slowly..even the strongest ppl can be aaffected.. And she was always trying to destroy my good name in front of my friends,family and the whole community in general because she couldn't stand the fact that I was liked and respected
Turning loss into gain. Knowing what my worth is and never insecure about my TRUTH. And actually doing the opposite to what the narsacist wanted or expected through their demoralising of the empatheticly sensative intuitive minds and facing up leaning in and owning my self like the BOSS OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND RESPECT I HAVE EARNED LONG AND HARD FOR EONS OF LIFETIMES. This disarms and destroys the the methodology of a narsacist. Because when an empatheticly sensative intuitive can understand about how they are and not allow anyone to steal their light they become destroyers of the world of NARSASISTIC PATHETIC EVIL SELF SERVICING FOOL'S. LOVE IS THE GREATEST POWER ON EARTH AND IN THIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE.
OWN YOUR GIFTS LIKE A DAMN UNSHAKABLE BOSS RARE BLESSED ONE'S!!!🌹🙏💝🌹🙏💎🙏🌹 NAMASTE.
Your comment is great, helped me a Lot! Thank you! Shine bright and keep yourself away fron the darkness. ❤
That LAST PART HIT 🎯. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE LOST EVERYTHING. I MEAN LITERALLY HAVE. NO vehicle, no $, no home, no relationship, no trust in myself to detect good people from bad, I feel I am bad. I am stuck taking care of two dogs, dogs he wanted during our relationship because I know they wouldn't make it if they were with him, but I am not doing so great myself but I want to give them stability. I am already sad about them not being able to live forever so I get resentful about everything. I am not getting the help I deserve it is making things worse
I am sorry to hear that ..i feel alot the some but i try to fight for keep on living ..i have a dog too ...hatd for me to take care but i am doing all i can..couse is realy love of my life ..
YES.. this is me exactly but I have a cat not a dog. See if you can find my post up above because I can't type it all out again. But this is exactly my living hell too. So sorry we have to go through this. Noone will help me either. 😢
Our pets are with us to remind us what real, unconditional love actually is.
Dude I can’t find a single day of peace even small moments of happiness goes away quick af . I hate this bruh she just living her bests life while slandering me and using my kids as a weapons.
Kids have their rights to choose too so should be able to choose when to see you. All kids need both/ all loving parents. Parents just have to be civil to each other after their relationship breaks up.
Masculinism is better known these days.
I've worked really hard for 20yrs to heal from this.
Can relate to most of the content. Currently running away from the triggers. Atlast realised peace is the best asset.
Idk... Maybe when I just woke up right now literally... Turned on this video. Cried the whole time though the video.... Maybe this right now, this moment I realize, I might have cpstd because everyone of these is my life, every day.... That's when.
You guys are awesome. I honestly don't know what I would have done without your guys insights. Keep pressing on is all we can do
What you guys are calling empaths, other people call autism spectrum. I'm taking in 100% of everything from all my senses all the time and some of them can be very annoying. But because I'm taking in so much, when people talk to me I'm assessing their body language, their tone, and everything about them; picking up on emotions and all kinds of things. So conversations always mean so much more to me than just what was said.
Have been separated from my narcissistic wife for a few months now and finally starting to come out of the cloud of chaos that I have been in the midst of for some years now. Having to learn who I am all over again.
Likely in 2016 once I started gaining traction towards my independence from old life and being betrayed by a former friend who ended up being a narcissist in their own way due to abuse from their families too. Wouldn't say I'm quite over it yet but definitely better progress than years ago
I have so many of these signs. I'm sometimes jumpy, don't allow myself to be vulnerable until I really get to know people, I avoid places where I have felt triggered in the past and am unable to regulate emotions sometimes, especially when I feel sadness, fear or anger due to ptsd.
This confirmed it. I am definitely an empathy. I have all ten of those. It was like someone was telling my whole life story.
After dad died, I was diagnosed with PTSD. It was traumatic due to the fact that I had lost my best friend (the one who understood me most). He and my mom were narcissists (despite themselves). Wonderful people, just terrible at letting me be freer to live my life. I do get jumpy and it doesn't help I work in a warehouse (LOL). I've overcome quite a few things. I have decided at this point that if I am supposed to be alone without a family I'll be alright. Maybe that's how it is supposed to be ? I'll never know.
So on point. I must be an empath. I experienced this 100%. However, the narcissist is brewing up a new attack and I see his plan. I am going to unmask him this time. Yes, it is time to unmask the narcissist. Bring whatever it may.
I hear you, though calling out the narc usually goes badly for the empathy. You may want to check out Dr Ramani on why not to call them out, especially if you're still with them.
When they said I lost everything, that's absolutely true, I've lost my confidence, opportunities haven't came my way and I'm literally homeless 😞 I don't have any type of health
In therapy still looking to heal
And me thinking I was cured from not one but hundreds of narcissists in my life. Thank you for the video! Now I can merrily go on and get the remaining 6 symptoms away as well! Keep up the good work 👌🏽🏆🏆🏆🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🎉
I'm not broken...society is....
After decades of abuse...what happens to the very livid and pissed off empaths who don't want violence, but yes a voice !?!?!
I demand it so !!!
17 years after my relationship ended with a narcissist. I'm still going through this. It drives me nuts I still dream almost every night of him while I have absolutely no feelings for him anymore. I mean, 17 years... Get the hell out of my dreams and thoughts already! And I haven't had a relationship since. I'm too afraid of feeling stuck in a relationship again. I keep people at an arm distance. And also having Avoidant Personality Disorder doesn't make it easier.
If one is txting u they seem to dominate ur time and sleep deprivation. At least that’s what iv experienced. Not only twisting things but very manipulative to achieve there goal.
After the abuse of a narc the feeling of betrayal and disrespect are overwhelming this is not going to get better with out counseling and time but the narc is gone and the worst is over stay no contact get on with your life and be the person who you want to be that narc creature will never change but you can move on and be free of that toxic childish behavior God bless
It happened to me when I last my mom as a young boy and again as an adult meeting a manic bipolar guy who was abusive, or tried to be. By then, my boundaries were too good.
Thanks for the video.
It's a difficult life to learn to live after you have escaped.
Everything remembers her to me. Lots of asociations of ideas with stimulae of the world. My world has been smeared by shame and sorrow.
Lots of thorns in my mind....God help me forget her PLEASE!
I found out about my C-PTSD from a phycologist. I havent moved passed jt, i still feel like im there. Memories still pleage my mind and nightmares still keep me up. Atleast im over the Stockholm syndrome
Narcissists need to drain and stalk other narcissists. Can you imagine that? They could gaslight each other to no end while we empaths breathe free.
Stop teasing us, Elizabeth :P haha
You should see what it’s like when 4 people in a family of 7 have pretty strong to full on narcissism. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
My mother is an extreme covert narcissist, and Ive been no contact with her for two and a half years. I fear running into her, and I cannot wait until I get the news that she has gone from this earth. The longer I am away from her, the worse the flashbacks get. My memories of all of the thirty years of dismissal, baiting, shaming, gaslighting and physical abuse just keep flooding back onto me. Im not sure if Im going to survive, but the knly reason I don't unalive myself is because it would give her great pleasure. So.
Narcissists won't bother me. I have a low tolerance threshold for drama and limited social skills. I'm one of the lucky ones. Lol
I have C-PTSD, and a sigma empath. I have shut down, and stay away from people, Now I welcome the flash backs,nightmares, I understand them, and they no longer bother me. I have faced my past, and am healing. That's how you can stop it.
First they diagnosed me with borderline
Which was no treatment for
It would just pass over time
So that was really reassuring and motivating (not)
So i went back and asked for a new one and than it became PTSD
And both diagnosis is because of
Abuse or neglect
That was explanation from the so-called exper
I have no family no support whatsoever
Even the police told me
I was a punching bag
For people to mess with
And i had to get used to it
So that made me feel also so much better
So never go there again
I handle the narcs my way now
I'm tired of not being able to defend myself and just call the police when I'm half-dead cause only then they may be able to help you but usually not
Cause you need to prove the abuse
And then one time i was in court
And the judge told me i wasn't allowed to cross my legs
Is that a law ?
I didn't know that
So if judge decides what i should do with my own body
There's no chance
So i understand this woman who killed 7 men
And was executed for it
Even though they abused her
So it's ok to torture people as long as you don't kill them
Great justice system
I struggle with my complex ptsd and major depression, anxiety and ocd.
I have PTSD ...to a lesser degree now - but inadvertently, I have found myself in triggering places sometimes and heard somewhere that the way to get through it - is to steel yourself and create good memories..in those places. ;)
Soo true !!!
Reclaim the memory - of course when you're strong enough to revisit the he place....
Thanks
J
It's been 10 years. Still didn't recover.
I tried to trust the wrong people along the way. That made it much worse. I still don't trust anyone. Every time I let my guard down, people take advantage of my kindness, assume it's weakness, and I become a money dispensing doormat. So at least for right now, it's better to be alone.
It's a very disturbing pattern that is incredibly damaging.
The prt2 channel is the only channel I use the first few links are for the prt1 channel.
I've been feeling suicidal I have had depression ever since I was 8 and now I am ready to give up completely cause of narcissistic family abuse
the same constant gaslighting,being framed for stuff,lied on,having to lie on myself and even put on acts for people like my parents and getting locked up to fit other peoples agendas.i will put the second video evidence channel links after the ones for the prt1 channel.
(Do not report this i will not get helped and my family will just make up a lie on me and I'll get locked up in a mental hospital
Which is worse than prison.)
I have been going through abuse my whole life and now i'm nearly 16.Now my parents can get away with it even more easily.Cause my mom has false diagnoses all over me 14
That i know of but I am sure there's more.Which I didn't actually start getting diagnoses put on me ever in my life untill I moved in with my mom for the first time when I was 10 the summer before 5th grade in 2016.which I moved back and forth so when I was 12 that's when she started getting serious diagnoses put on me.my family takes advantage of those diagnoses so now when someone makes a DSS report or the police get involved my parents can just bring up the diagnoses and the social worker or police won't even talk to me or look at my video evidence going back to when I WAS 8 I HAVE OVER 897
VIDEOS OF EVIDENCE IN TOTAL FOR BOTH DAILY ABUSE EVIDENCE CHANNELS .My parents just say I am "hallucinating,delusional,manipulative,lying" the list goes on with excuses they can make.here are the people that are calling me crazy
(PRT1 CHANNEL)
(MY MOM she is first cause she is the one who got all the diagnoses put on me mostly by her self but with the help of Steven when he eventually came along)
czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHxHdpwnsxPLoIc0ySGqo1t2.html
(MY DAD🌟)
czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHxRDG9ajRU5Np94Xhco5HXW.html
(MY MOM'S BOYFRIEND)
czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHxvOn_PGnjpgkW0cL5REW56.html
(MY SISTER although she is not the cause of the diagnoses and had no say so in it she does try to make it seem like I am the crazy one well plane out lying and that things aren't as bad as i think they are.#gaslighting)
czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHzG5KucsJdpwQPsJX4DckQl.html
(Videos in correct order prt1 channel)
Videos in correct order: czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHzaFRmkDx4pj9Fk0Kq5IVqr.html
(THE FILES OF 52 PRT2 CHANNEL)
(school situation also the School has noticed red flags recently)
School situation: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da-eb5W9k5dOlHxh7LNjJgaE.html
(My mom's abuse 2)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9tN6gRiUv2ENfX_9MNOmhZ.html
(Steve's abuse 2)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da8lHtFO11rbYZGOi-M6Kv3F.html
(My sisters enabling 2)
My sisters enabling 2: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da-UcU5yFKr-BTpokm-qgkP3.html
(Situation with getting a job so I can save up)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9s_1gFEfK9dtl5LG2KtZy8.html
(This is why I have to watch my surroundings the playlist is dedicated
To my "family" telling life threatening lies on me)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9jHyjFYnM5mEF1c1x-8QNg.html
(The dog situation.Steve's extreme animal abuse.the dog still has it better than me though)
1.czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHwn6Y3z87EWmNfCcYrKDswI.html
(steves animal abuse prt2)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da-zvxKtIRTSDqHsrXEWURvG.html
(My family says I disrespectful and never clean up 2)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da9okWytM9pihLSpXcZIuJfu.html
(Prt1)
I get accused of never cleaning up or paying attention to how the house looks: czcams.com/play/PLnIepZjMetHzGguacJjuheBZTLNrmpbAb.html
(The ongoing lie my mom made up in 2016 that I don't shower)
czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da86z7XOV4uTsdkH2_aFye8F.html
Steve making a scene outside: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da_3dDSZJ7MG7OExJmjg8PwZ.html
(This includes my mom also not just her boyfriend)
Steve acting crazy in the car: czcams.com/play/PLWoUsQs03da_aGLVkhvxQujnbBdZRCVi_.html
it was already bingo with the first sign, but not the nightmares, but the more severe result of having a comlete insomnia ... that's why I do not speak about C-PTSD, but CTSD - a chronical traumatic stress disorder ... nobody saw what I saw and the others had an easy disclaim on reserve - because I already had determined my high sensitivity and had declared that it was NOT a disorder, but a different type of processing, it was so much easier to insinuate a mental disorder and play down the obvious signs that there had to be a source outside of my control. It was only recently that I became interested in the narcissistic patterns and saw that we are very careless with the not so obvious patterns, certainly when it is a slow process. It was not only the understanding that I had to go back into the burning house (he made me financially codependent), but that he got all the credits and I only got the critique. That's the reason why it is appropriate to speak about a *narcissistic labyrinth* - at a certain point, you are enclosed by 4 walls and don't have the energy to climb over them. When it becomes really dangerous, it becomes clear to you that nobody can help you, the bullies are always three steps ahead of you and when you put the legal decisions on a timeline, you see that every judgement had to support an earlier one - you go deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole. I compare this with being punished by 30 whippings, but, instead of giving them all at once, they give you only one and let you be cured before they give you the next one - it's the expectation that empties you from inside out. I know, what's done can't be undone, but it's time for upper courts starting to use the Humane Codex (you possess your life and only your own life) to reinforce good behaviour. I wanted to get out of the mess, but had no money to pay the ferryman, if you know what I mean.
Ive turned into a crazy person dealing with narc abuse. Lord help me. My emotions are hot and cold and i have to keep the hatred that's in my heart under control. I was messed over!!!!! Yalll pray for me.
I especially loved the ending of this video. Although mine is gone now, since the narcissist was my "father", I have carried this through my whole life (I will be 65 next month). Thank you for helping me let go and to get to know myself the way I knew I always was but wasn't really allowed to. I knew I was right and he was wrong by the time I got into my teens, and I was seriously rebellious, but even taking that into consideration, it really didn't help my psyche as I continued to age because it basically started from birth.
Oh yes, thank you. I so needed this today. A lovely piece of timing. There’s nothing like being reminded of trauma, when you have trauma and are currently in the middle trying to stay relatively sane as your mind breaking is breaking down. Yay yay yay. If you thought you might possibly, but probably not, keeping the glue in place after 60 years of compartmentalised relative success..then ha ha ha bish, good luck with that……’we’re back, just to make sure that we’re still f*cking you over, even tho most of us a dead,good morning.’ And am I going through the bitter and f*cking angry stage of C-PTSD? Too f*cking right. And did it take forever to get here? Also… too f*cking right. And do I even see any point to enduring one more day on this god forsaken planet? Nope. But I’m trying.
Right here with you on all that. May the force be with you
Men can be empaths and the ABUSIVE narcissist CAN be a woman…
Yep. Empaths lose EVERYTHING while the narcissist skips off to their next victim.
O.K. I know I'm on the c-ptsd fringe, It is interesting watching as my words are quickly mocked. I really don't mind, I know what is coming as the stupid can't rule forever.
Excellent...mother and sisters and husband TOOK EVERYTHING...AFTER I MADE HUGE SACRIFICES FOR THEM...LIFE IS HARD..
WE START AT LESS THAN 0
Completely accurate
For myself, Since childhood, My Issue is, that the Narcissist that surrounds me & has since was born, happens to be my Mother, who is and always has been physically, verbally, emotionally and mentally Abusive to Me and my siblings and is whom of which I am Currently living with, while searching for another apartment, Unfortunately. This was the last place I wanted to have to come to, and it has been a living 24/7 nightmare, like I knew it would be, for past few years now, and it has totally brought me down & broken me once again. I Stay in the room I sometimes Sleep in, most of the time I'm awake, and I don't have friends anymore, I don't go anywhere anymore. I have also come to the point of having to barricade my bedroom door for over a year or more now, sadly. It will be a struggle for me, once I leave, to find myself again, but I know it's a struggle worth fighting for and I pray I achieve it again. I need to make my Own Happiness more worth while than like I've always done, which is, Always putting Everyone Else's Happiness first, that's a daily struggle in itself for me, one day the word NO will come outta my mouth way more often than it Currently does. Until then, I'm Now the Girl in the Window up in the Tower of the Evil Witches Castle hidden amongst the forest.
I’m in the process of making sense of my trauma, coming from an overly religious and traditional Mexican household. I first started to regain self awareness when I was 19. Prior to that I kept getting myself into trouble because I would be attracted to people like my abusers (parental figure)
I honestly went my entire life thinking everything was normal and it’s just how my traditions are. I never felt safe in my own home. I often feared my family excommunicating me which almost happened when my mom found out I was smoking weed. Psychedelics opened my eyes to my reality. I thank my empathetic abilities for bringing me close to this. I can’t help but wonder where I’d be if it wasn’t for psychedelics.
I’m still powering through it and often feel alone because my family has always made me feel less for many reasons. I remember the first time I tried to explain this to my dad. He was insulted that would question his abilities.
I’m also in the process of getting an autism diagnosis. I’m 26 and my mom is embarrassed that I would even entertain the thought.
Definitely have accepted that I will be alone and that I deserve what I have and been thru… So fucked up…
Tomorrow is ALWAYS a new day!! Hang in there. Peace to you.