Why These Millennial Brides Say A Wedding Isn't Worth The Money
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- čas přidán 23. 07. 2022
- The wedding industry often sells couples a fantasy: This is the best, happiest or most important day of your life. It's how some couples justify spending tens of thousands of dollars on one day. But millennials and Gen Z are increasingly questioning whether a traditional wedding is worth the money.
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Why These Millennial Brides Say A Wedding Isn't Worth The Money
Imagine the vacation you and your spouse can have for $28k (or even half that) and not for just 1 day. Now *that* would be memorable.
Thank you! I've been saying this well before I was marriage age lol
@@SusannaJ It's obvious really. What's interesting is why some people don't get it.
Down payment on a house, too. So many tangible things that otherwise would be hard to afford.
Over 5 year every year
Exactly!
Spent about $120 on our wedding, and that was mostly the cost of the marriage certificate. Feel great about the money saved.
I love this so much.
Well Done!
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
I'd rather spend money on an AWESOME honeymoon than a wedding.
@@robertdahammer4850 My friend did this for her 2nd wedding. She learned the hard way, got divorced after 6 years on her first marriage (HUGE EXPENSIVE WEDDING). Her 2nd wedding was courthouse, then all of us 12 people went to the private room in this awesome restaurant that had alcoholic boba and amazing Chinese fusion food. Then 2 months later, she and her hubby went on their honeymoon for 3 weeks to like 4 different European countries drinking and eating whatever they wanted.
My bestie got married at the courthouse, they both invited their closest friends (15), we had a fantastic lunch together and the next day she and her husband started their adventure with a 6 week honeymoon!! 🤩😍 #lifegoals.
That's what my parents did. They've been to many countries. Never occurred to me to do it any other way.
That is awesome! That's all you need.
we did the same thing. Spent EUR 1000 for the whole thing including the dress and had a really nice time
That's similar to my plan in the future!
Me and my man are going to do it the same way and I can’t wait 😊. Use the money,energy,love and time on the marriage itself and not just a silly party 😊.
Recently, one of my coworkers went to buy a wedding ring. When he told the salesman that his budget for a ring was $6000, the salesman's response was "Man, do you even love this girl?"
It seems to me there's a lot of pressure to spend more on your wedding than you can actually afford.
thats how they pressure you to make bigger purchase and the salesman or woman try and make money.
In a case like that I would walk out and find another Jeweler. AND write the owner of the first Jeweler why he forever lost a customer
I hope he complained to the owner and left... so rude!!!
Your profile picture sums up my reaction 😂
That’s crazy. You can get a beautiful ring for 6k. I don’t believe in going into debt over a wedding
Weddings seem rather embarrassing in a way. Not everyone wants such special moments displayed for others to observe.
This. I’m not paying $30k to be embarrassed all day
I think it depends the person, but if a couple really don't want a wedding, they legally don't need to have one. People do it for the community as much as for themselves
I hate being the center of attention so a wedding would definitely be out of the question for me. I would rather spend or save that money for something else.
As a wedding photographer, I TOTALLY stand behind the message of this video. Something that's been lost over time I feel like is the pomp and circumstance of weddings. Having to have everything be perfect and paying so much for your guests generally leaves couples missing out on exactly what they wanted. Just to have a good time. I'm ALL FOR smaller weddings and eloping. I did it myself. It makes more sense depending on your financial situation. Also, as long as you have great photos for memories and your closest friends and family it doesn't really need to be so big. Half the time I'd say 80% of the guest only show up to eat and dance and then leave.
I spent $5000 on our wedding and just had a small group at the registrar office followed by a small party. A bunch of people on husband's side of the family got their knickers in a twist. They were convinced I invited my family and not theirs. My family were on another continent, there were twice as many people from husband's family. I just didn't invite cousins husband hasn't seen in years etc... Best decision, no regrets.
@@runningfromabear8354 That's wise to keep it small and intimate. Who cares if people that didn't get invited get mad. No matter what someone whether invited or not will have something to say was not right, so just do what's right for you.
its all too fake now.
Yew but it's the couple's fault for planning a party where they left out their own interests. Always remember yourself. ❤️ u planned the party, u should like it! Don't plan things u don't like or want to do.
Only to dance, eat, drink, and leave? That is the most perfect description of Polish weddings I have ever encountered.
Literally, my nation loves big family parties and I know the main reason for that is to become heavily drunk.😮 Becasue we don't sip little shots we just overdose alcohol. I am not for it. I am really sad knowing people wouldn't come for me but for all the party...😢 Even wouldn't speak to stars of the day but to another people because they mainly come to meet X ot Y but not me...
My husband and I got married in our apartment in 2020 mostly due to Covid shutting things down. We took pictures in a nice location. We spent about $1500 total including my dress and photos. We saved a ton of money we were able to buy our first home and went on a honeymoon and spent a week traveling Europe. I think it was the right call considering what we gained in the end. People need to do what is right for them, not because of familial pressure.
Wow my husband and I got married in July 3rd 2019 . We spent $1,600. We were just going to elope. My dress was only $45. My ring like $600. His was less. I am sad to say I lost my ring last year in March. We told the family and friends last minute. Our last second reception was at our tiny duplex. We bought a home now. And we have 2.5 kids now. Lol
@@blaqt107 2.5 kids?
@@honeybadger178 I’ll assume the .5 kid is their pet lol
A week traveling Europe ? Did you spend a day in 7 european countries or how did it workout ?
Week traveling Europe? As Europian myself that sounds confusing. Did you go every day to a different country? That doesnt sound good. But if you enjoy it, great!
My husband and I got married in 2019. Every time we started putting the guest list together or looking at venues we would both get overwhelmed. We got a call in September 2019 that a friend couldn’t use their ocean front time share on Maui and we were welcome to use it. We jumped on it and decided to elope. Had two weeks to plan and it was just the two of us. It was perfect and since we didn’t have a wedding we were able to splurge on excursions and make the most out of our trip.
I would never cut my immediate family out of my wedding (parents & sister). We are having a wedding with about 20 guests, that’s it.
If I could redo my wedding, my husband and I would elope. To this day I regret spending thousands of dollars on a day that was over in a blink of an eye and caused me unnecessary stress.
Same! Kicking myself for not pushing back on the wedding and not eloping overseas
That’s literally my dream
i was only an emcee in a few weddings of friends and it was mega Stressful. So i can imagine how a bride feels.
@@alayhaferron1972 same. I really want to elope as my wedding. I don't like the idea of entertaining guests and worrying about how much fun everyone is having. I just want to have a micro wedding where we sign a paper and drink champagne
Our wedding was definitely for everyone else. If you're considering a traditional wedding, I recommend considering if this is what you really want deep in your soul. You can do a really cute elopement for a fraction of the cost. I was stressed the whole time
It’s def not worth it. I love going to them for the free food but I never wanted one (in my wiser years of being financially savvy) 😊
Same here!
I feel like most people who go in with the expectation that their wedding is "about me" are disappointed. Fundamentally you're throwing a lavish party that's as much about the guests as it is about the couple. If you want "about me" eloping, or something super small with just immediate family and a few close friends is a better choice.
The wedding industrial complex. Too many movies and cultural pressure, esp on straight women to have the dress and the right photos etc.
Wedding photographer here 🙋🏻♀️ I always cringe when I hear couples not feeling comfortable being honest and open about their wedding plans for fear of being taken advantage of. I personally charge the same price for a wedding vs an engagement vs a birthday party vs whatever. Choose vendors who are transparent with you.
The reason why I could see the pices being different is if the expectation of the services you will provide really are going to be different for each one of those in a way that the workload on you as a photographer changes. A wedding is likely to be longer than an engagement or birthday party especially if you are expected to come do the getting ready photos. The getting ready time is more involved for a wedding so as a photographer you usually have to arrive earlier in terms of how many hours before the event starts you have to get there. You might need a second shooter if you need to get the bride and groom getting ready shots and they are not getting ready close enough to each other that you can easily pop back and forth between them. The retouching expectations on the photos may be higher so the time you spend editing and retouching them may be increased. I would consider these all valid reasons to charge more. However if these are not considerations than I would agree simply charging more because it's a wedding vs a different event is not fair.
@@RamaSivamani Biggest solution to that is I just charge hourly for everything. But you’re certainly right about different expectations for different events too. Just want the “wedding tax” term to be gone along with the practice of it.
My parents went to the courthouse to get married. My mom never regretted it. My mom once was a brides maid at her sisters wedding and she said her sister was so stressed that it looked like she wasn’t enjoying the experience. My mom decided she’d rather just go to the courthouse when she got married. My parents have been together for more than 20 years. One of their friends took their advice and did the same thing, a courthouse wedding and then a small get together at the house afterwards, they loved it and have been together for over 10 years. Honestly i’d rather just go to the courthouse. I’d rather use 30,000 to buy a house or something big to use with my future husband
I like what my mom and stepdad did. They got permission to use a campground a church has, and got married on the beach. A lot of guests and the pastor already had cabins at the camp, so the only location fees were renting cabins for family members who flew in from other places. The flowers were all wild, a friend and I made the cake with help from my aunt, and everyone got their clothes from thrift stores or outlets, just basing it around a basic colour scheme rather than having the expensive bridesmaids dresses and such.
I personally love outdoor weddings, and there are even some public parks that let you use them for free! That's what I'd like to look into myself, and use the money to help my relatives who live across the country fly out here and visit. Family is very important to my boyfriend and I, so it would be a good excuse to meet the extended family.
I'm a pastor and have done a couple of smaller weddings, even without guests (according to my country's laws there needs to be two witnesses, that is easily arranged). I myself got married in mass with a full congregation and then had our 30 closest for dinner at a restaurant. I don't really understand why "traditional" needs to be super expensive, at least as far as ceremony goes. I never check the pricetag of bride's dresses or control their wedding venue. I doubt other religious traditions do either, or public officiators in other places than the courthouse. To me it's simple. You show up as planned (preparations+at the day), you have the paperwork, you say yes, you get married.
Have a huge wedding. Take tons of pictures and videos and have a good DJ. Try to get photos of everyone in attendance, dancing, posing, and enjoying themselves. Guaranteed, you won't regret it. Some of the attendees won't be with us for long, sadly, and the memories of them having fun at your party is so worthwhile.
Yes, it can be costly, so basically ask people to cover their costs and invite everyone who can afford it.
$120/ person is reasonable and affordable to have a once in a lifetime opportunity.
No one will regret it. Trust.
We eloped. We'll be married 25 years in August. We wanted a marriage, not a wedding. Zero regrets, and I could see at least our oldest daughter and her boyfriend following suit.
👏👏👏
Our wedding cost $12k but we had the cash for it. It was an amazing day to start off an amazing marriage. We had about 110 guests and a wonderful time. Did we go into debt? Not at all. My advice do what YOU want and what you can afford.
😍😍😍😍
This 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Same for us. We are in our 30s and are funding our own wedding. It is themed, because I hate weddings and think they are stupid, HOWEVER, a THEMED wedding is more like a fun party. This is totally on me though, I don't like normal weddings cause I'm a twin and hate the focus on myself.
Yes! We paid $12k for wedding and honeymoon! It was the best decision.
My wedding WAS one of the happiest days of my life. It was worth it. No regrets. I enjoyed the planning. I felt like a queen. Everyone we love together in one place. It makes me smile every time I think about it. But we stuck to a budget reasonable for us and paid CASH money.
Happy to hear that sis! The most important thing is to have a Guest count that you can manage, be transparent about what you can and cannot afford, and hire a coordinator for the day of.
How much? Something within $5k to $10k?
@@phoenix5054 We spent a little over 11k. Not counting dress/tux and extras like make up, hair, etc. I was shooting for 10k so I was okay with how we did.
@@mahoganydrive so with dress/tux hair and make up it was around 15K
@@AlexiusS okay I went to check! Lol. Wedding $11,275, My dress and shoes including alterations $750 (my dress was $491 and we got a free tux for groom deal, inexpensive flat sandals was good enough for me), Hair/mani/pedi $135. I was gifted make up artist by my mom. $12,445 total.
This is my last year as a wedding photographer. I’ve fallen out of love with shooting them. I used to love it but something’s happened and I just see them as silly now. The amount of brides that are so stressed about the dumbest things is just one of many reasons why I’m burnt out. Wedding tax from a photographers point is justified for many reasons. We photograph from 10 am to 11pm. Even if there’s a wedding planner we are planning the day and being asked to do a lot more than just photograph the day. We’re day of psychiatrist for stressful brides/mothers. Ask any videographer, they just document the day and sit in our shadow. We bring 20k worth of gear that’s moved from getting ready to church to reception, we’re shooting detail shots, family, wedding party the list is vast. Thousands of images and at least 8-16 hours of editing. I’m leaving out a ton of other things,having a solid/talented second shooter, having backup photographers in case we get Covid. This list goes on and on and I’m glad to be finished.
Wedding planner's assistant and wedding photographer here!🙋🏼♀ I've worked countless weddings with budgets ranging from $75k to $1 million. At the end of the day, it's just one day and SO many details are overlooked/under appreciated by guests. The wedding goes by so fast! If you can afford it and want it, I say go for it! Otherwise, it's not worth putting yourself in financial strain for.
Covid saved our marriage, we used the money my parents gifted me to buy a house before the housing market skyrocketed in 2020/ 2021. Thankful for my home and the husband I have!!!
As a Muslim we're encouraged to be as modest as possible and honestly that's what I want to do. People spend so much money trying to outdo previous brides or impress people they don't know and won't be able to impress. People will always talk horribly about your wedding. Might as well save your money and spend it as a married couple on a house or future children or whatever makes your life easier as a couple.
That's funny because all the Muslim weddings I've been to had obscene budgets
@@syawkcab 😂😂😂 I know but it’s better if it’s modest most don’t care and ball out
Funily enough weddings originally in the West were modest for the majority of people of it being a small ceremony, followed by a pot-luck party. It was not until there where huge advertisements to the public that you must do the same as the royal family which is where the white wedding idea came from, where the price wars of weddings came from.
Did a small wedding about 10 years ago for $5,000. It was one of the happiest days of my life.
I had a micro wedding with 25 guests for about 6 grand and it was amazing! I got to actually enjoy my day and spend time with all the guests. We invited about 50 people to the evening reception and to me that was prefect
Too much still
Planning 100 guests for $7.5k
Got married in early 2022 in a community hall that we decorated ourselves. Cost about $6000 Australian dollars. I would have been happy having it even smaller. Don’t let the wedding industry pressure you. Let your life with the one you love bring you joy. A wedding is just a party.
My wife and I got married at her place of business with about 20 friends. Total cost was $200, love my wife with all my heart.
Ngl hearing about the girl who’s dad passed made me bawl my eyes out. I’m not married but as I approach my 30s in a stable relationship with the man I love I often get sad when I think about how my father passed and won’t be there for daughter/dad dance and what not. I’m glad she was able to spend that moment with him.
My best friend got married in January 2022 and spent $8,000 for her wedding. However, most of that cost went towards booking a small 15 room motel in the CA desert for a 2 night 3 day stay. This desert was a meaningful part of her relationship with her now husband so naturally the destination wedding location made sense. She also wanted to remove the cost barrier of making her guests pay for the hotel rooms. The total wedding party was about 25-30 people. I knew most of the people who attended so it felt special to me. In other weddings, I usually don't know most of the people in attendance. Most of the food was contributed by both families. We ate at a local restaurant for the "reception" and their families pitched in to cook the rest of the meals. They also rented a nearby campsite for an alternative location to gather together. We did an easy hike, used the motel pool, had a campfire. It felt like a retreat! Best wedding I've ever attended.
The wedding industry specifically inflates the cost for every aspect of wedding planning. Huge markups if it's related to a wedding.
I come from a huge extended family. If my mom wants to host a traditional Chinese reception for our 200+ relatives, she is totally welcome to pay for it. Since Chinese people traditionally give money as a wedding gift, she'll likely get most of her money back for hosting the banquet. Meanwhile, I'll put my money towards crafting an intimate gathering of my closest friends and relatives for a casual wedding that reflects my relationship with my future husband. But first, need to find a man. Lol
Sounds like my dream wedding too! If my reception includes my husband and I along with our friends and family eating pizza on the couch and talking about life, I would call that a success.
THIS!!! Your friends wedding sounds so special for everyone involved. I'd much prefer this scenario than a big wedding with a "hi" "bye" mentality. If my special people are going to take time out of their busy lives to celebrate my special day, I want to be able to spend memorable time with them.
I had a DIY backyard wedding. We’re fortunate to have a large yard, nearly an acre that easily accommodated 75 guests. We wholesaled, spent weekends fabricating the arch, painting wood flowers, etc. Out of pocket, we came in just under 10k but was able to resell 4k worth.
It all came out beautifully and my only regret is not spending the money for a videographer.
That's what my boyfriend wants to do. We have grandparents with nice sized yards, he wants to make the arch, and I can sew to make my own outfit and use extra of the same fabric to make decor. It's a lot cheaper to buy fabric by the bolt (usually 25 yards or more) when it comes to ordering stuff, so it could make some nice curtains, walkway markers, or whatever is needed. We have a mutual friend who took cinematography in college, so we'd definitely ask him to do video. I've done some video work, and it's something a lot of people overlook. Some photographers do both, but it depends.
Ooooh videographer is sooo worth it!
I think backyard weddings are dying as apartment living and small block sizes increase
Some time ago, an article I read stated that people spent around on average 40k on a wedding, which at the time the article was written was about equal to the money spent on a college degree. Dropping 40k on one day is mind blowing.
One of the last weddings I went to almost 20 years ago, a very wealthy relative boasted that he paid the band 50,000 USD. It was hard not to worry about having something that topped that band because they actually performed at other high profile celebrity weddings before. I decided pretty much on that day, there is too much attached to the prestige and being a flaunting kind of person so I got over it. And they never cared that I did not invite them either! LOL
Spending money on my wedding was worth it to me. Made amazing memories with family and friends that I’ll cherish forever!
We spent ~ $300 on our wedding (backyard wedding) in 2020. And used that $25,000 for a down payment on a house. It was a fun day but most importantly we’re married and we’re able to use that money to build a future together.
You guys should have interviewed people like me who had small, cheap weddings or eloped instead of these women who had 100+ guests at their traditional weddings.
Or maybe interviewed people with 500 guests at their wedding that they could afford and really enjoyed every minute of it!
I went to a wedding of my cousin. It was extravagant, the most extra I have seen in my 30 plus yrs of my life. But more than the wedding itself, our memories with our family was so memorable! We had games, funny programs and the whole family had fun. To each their own. If they can afford it, if the friends and family are close, who are we to judge?
PS Calm down people. Im just an Asian who appreciates a good family wedding😁 Plus weddings give jobs for your friends-- from food industry, to creatives and artisans.
I’m glad you had a great time and you’re truly blessed and I agree with you! If my family was as great as yours I would also invest in a gorgeous wedding why not? I specially love looking at wedding photos!
To each their own
This is what I love to hear! These are the highlights that families remember for a lifetime.
Voicing out an opinion means judging nowadays? Wow! Good luck with your way of thinking.
Exactly
I am 33, single, never been married and at this point I can not imagine having a wedding. I would much rather have a nice honeymoon. Mostly as I have gotten older there are only like a handful of people I would truly care if they were there. Now if my future husband wanted one, then I may compromise. But I would rather have a small courthouse wedding and just get a photographer to take nice pictures.
You said everything!!
Hi
I agree. I recently turned 43 and I don't care to have a big wedding as I might have when I was in my 20's. No thanks!
You go!
Yes I agree, when I was younger I had a desire to have a wedding, but now that I'm much older now 44 "engaged" I'm planning on having a Courthouse ceremony, getting a photographer, and going on a honeymoon❣️
Honestly, my ideal wedding is close family and friends at the courthouse (or something similar). Short and sweet ceremony, a nice place to take pics and budget more money for a nice trip.
Extravagant weddings really are like putting on a show and I’m more of a private/reserved person. I’ve always imagined having a small/frugal wedding.
My fellow Millennials have student loans to pay-off ... and that $35,000 marriage price tag does not help at all.
I’ve definitely seen an anecdotal correlation between the people who did extravagant weddings and the people who end up getting divorced. Also, I know for a fact vendors bump their prices up when they know it’s a wedding.
There was a study done in this and it corroborates your observation.
True. It depends on the culture too tho. That’s a big factor.
@@ugotserved911 yeah some cultures have extravagant weddings but divorce is rare because its taboo
I think this is very true! I was pretty young getting married right in the smack of the great recession. I would tell my people ask anyone who stays married after this kind of economy how because the times will show you if it is for real or a short term arrangement. Now, I am about to stay married longer than my own Parents because it was for love and all the right reasons! My outlook has always been many people are too interested in the bells and whistles of the wedding and the picture perfect images but is that really necessary? Back then, we were nearly broke so our wedding was like 400 bucks but we still enjoyed ourselves.
Thing is...most times when people are genuinely in love & want to get married for the right reasons, they don't attach a whole lot of importance to things like the flowers, table arrangements, bride's maid dresses etc. They just wanna get married. on the other hand, when people are not really sure there's usually a certain emptiness that needs to be filled with something else. So they try to distract from that uncertainty by making sure other things are perfect hoping that it can give them a semblance of happiness.
This is why I eloped for 2k to pay for the venue, photography and dress, etc in total, and I got BOMB photos from it...that's all I really cared about. It was my day, and people got to "see it" on social media. Very happy with my decision.
^ This is the way to go.
Great job!
Loved my wedding! It was smaller to keep me less stressed, but my husband and I never felt more love for us in one room 😍
We spent $5,000 on our wedding (a small ceremony only) and felt great about it 😊
My husband and I are 24 turning 25, we got married on May 7th, 2022 at an big Airbnb house nearby Niagara Falls. We spent around $5800. This includes the 2-night Airbnb house where we had our venue, MC host, buffet catering, friend photographer, wedding cake, and our wedding attire. If we had spent more, we wouldn't have been able to buy a car. We had no bridesmaids or groomsmen, no bridal shower or bachelor parties, just the wedding and the fun night. The Airbnb hosts provided a wedding arbour (and assembled it for us), 2 tents for the reception, and enough chairs for 40 people. They even helped us by returning our rental chair covers for us. Also, we bought our ceremonial wedding rings on Amazon because we just couldn't care less about real rings!
I feel like we pleased both our parents but at the same time we didn't let ourselves get consumed by impressing everyone. I have no regrets at all.
There is a happy medium between a blow out, “conventional” wedding and eloping. We had a fancy brunch and ceremonies and a cool dinner party in the city after. Cost half or less of a traditional wedding. The party bus to take us, was the highlight. I got a dress at a mall store. It’s a party, and we have to rethink of this as a party/celebration. No one handed a mandate to do “all things”. People need to break free and be creative. What do YOU really enjoy? Have a BBQ on the beach, have a theme park or Irish pub reception. Our grandparents and great grandparents had weddings in church halls and dining rooms. Tell the wedding industry where to shove it!
Got married in a beautiful white chapel overlooking the sea in Australia just my husband and I. Never regretted eloping. The day was so special, just us two. I wouldn’t like the stress of a big wedding thinking if my guests are having fun. I also wanted to concentrate on a happy marriage rather than just one day.
I also wouldn’t get into debt for a wedding. That’s just me though. Still married 7 years later, still happy with the decision and the marriage! 💗
My sister spent around $30k on her wedding and she got all that back in gifts.
It’s not about impressing and pleasing people on your wedding. It’s about having fun with your family and friends and sharing the love you have.
Just do you!
wow. your family is incredibly lucky
It's very rare to get it all back in gifts. If you spend thirty grand to invite 200+ people that's doable, but if you want to "get it all back in gifts" you realistically have to really scrimp on details. My wedding was about the same price, but for about sixty people. I didn't remotely expect to get it all back in gifts, and it's frankly tacky to expect that.
Unless she got several gifts that costs thousands of bucks there is no way she got that much back in gifts.
@@lacee7494 It's possible to recoup what you spent if you have either a very large or very cheap wedding. (And by very cheap, I mean per person cheap. 30K is quite inexpensive if you're having like 200 people.)
We decided to do the most simple wedding ever, we didn't spent almost anything and everyone was so surprised about how much fun could they have in a simple wedding. Thanks to the money we didn't spent doing a big wedding, we were able to go on a 2 month roadtrip as our honeymoon. All of our friends who had done big wedding parties told us that they regret it so much, that they wish they had used that money for something else such as traveling, saving it for a house or an apartment, etc.
Wow this is NEEDED these outside expectations have to stop thank you
I had a much beautiful wedding. It was put together in less than A-day. The most expensive thing was my wedding dress I already had for $60. I stopped by the dollar store picked up some purple and blue glow sticks. I put the glow sticks in Mason jars with water and put them along a path away to a hill. I put some little electric tea lights and other jars and put them in a semi circle at the top of the hill. And I got married on top of the hill under a full moon. My brother brought fireworks. And my aunt was a notary married us.
Love it!
My husband and I had a budget of $17,000 and we had a guest list of 170. We both come from big families and have many people we care about and love, so our guest list got big pretty quickly. Nonetheless, we were able to pay for everything out of pocket with diligent budgeting and we had the wedding of our dreams and made so many great memories. ♡♡♡ Everyone..just do you!! :)
OMG Great job!
When was that?
@youparejo it was last year! Lol. Btw it's important to know that all our decorations were done by ourselves and we had to look for a venue that allowed us to use our own vendors. Some venues want you to use their chose of vendors which can add up. But our vendors were mostly our friends who had their mini side business such as photography
My wedding was amazing in 2021 but we had a smaller destination wedding with 65 guests and overall it was $18k with a honeymoon suite included 😊. It was one of the best days ever with people I love and danced so much. Simply loved it! 💛
do you mind sharing where you held your destination wedding? I am slowly leaning more toward that with less people than a local traditional one
I spent less than 20k for 2 honeymoons, one day dedicated to the ceremony with 25ppl and one day dedicated to the reception with around 120 ppl...we had an amazing time! And this includes decor, dresses suits etc.
Where did you get married?
I couldn’t imagine inviting/spending money on people I barely know to attend my wedding or attending a wedding of someone I barely know 🤷🏽♀️
Why would you be inviting people you barely know to your wedding in the first place though?
people who have big weddings usually have BIG families and LOTS of friends
@@lacee7494 there’s a big difference between friends and acquaintances and between actual family and family whom are just family because of blood but not because they are actually there for you. For some big weddings are just to show off.
@@TomikaKelly well its also a cultural thing. A traditional wedding in India always has a lot of people! the more the better. and you end up seeing people you have never seen before
My brother took the wedding money and started a business for his wife, she's A LOT happier now with realizing her dream than a waste of money for a single day. Also, friends and family' happiness doesn't always equate to your own.
I think this opened my eyes to what I want for our wedding, and I’m going to talk to my fiancé about it. The part where the brides felt the day was for others rather than the couple, opened my eyes to “I want our actual day to be our day.” Might just elope and celebrate with our family still later on down the line when we have the actual money. One day for us and one day for our family.
I was 20 when I got married. I’m now 34. I really enjoyed my day, we had a very small venue, I made my own very simple center pieces, we paid a friend to take pictures… I had a blast and we kept it super simple… a few things I would have done different would have been a smaller guest list and definitely would have had an after party !!! We started our life’s together debt free and we continue to make smart financial choices. No need to impress anyone or get Into debt to please others!!!
Im getting married in September and so far we are 15k in. We have been together 7 years and I don’t regret it at all. I am Catholic and We are having a traditional wedding through church and all. We don’t have any other debt and we saved all of this money through the pandemic. I love that all my family and friends will be there together and I cant wait 🥰
Congratulations 🍾
We spent 7k on our wedding with 40 guests and I made most things - my dress, the cake, decorations myself and I miss my wedding almost everyday!
If you want to love your wedding have as few guests as possible, only people you know well, and make something for the day yourself, even if you can afford not to!
My wedding in 1984 cost less than $2000 out of our pocket, including my dress, and both our daughter's dresses, his tux, minimal flowers, the photographer & pictures, and a cake. We didn't have an engagement ring. My mother bought beer and soft drinks, and my father and stepmother homecooked a cold buffet that was really good. We had about 75 guests. I didn't get to eat or drink. We had a good time, but it was a blur. We were grown ups so didn't register for gifts anywhere. We specifically told people we didn't need gifts, but we did a lot of very personal things, and enough cash to pay for our week on the beach. In 1984 dollars. I would not have done it any differently, I was in my 20s and think we did a good job of controlling costs.
If I may ask why didn't you have an engagement ring? I'm currently engaged and I don't have an engagement ring either. I know most women who are engaged always have an engagement ring.
I've never personally known someone that had that much money for a wedding. My most expensive item for our wedding was my wedding dress from David's Bridal and our rings. It wasn't the happiest day of my life but I remember the feeling of love while walking down the aisle and seeing friends and family that came to our special day.
The people who care for you were there on your special day and made you feel special is what matters.
I think the best wedding planing advice I ever received- and that I constantly tell others- just make sure you just enjoy the day. Screw your guest- are you and your partner happy? That’s it. Nothing else matters.
Just got married 3 weeks ago - all in about $2000 - and it was a wonderful time! The majority of our costs were the venue, insurance and food. Guest list was about 30 people. We DIY’ed much of it and we are very thankful to our friends and family who were awesomely helpful. We wore clothes we already owned and the entire day was imperfectly perfect. Best part, I have the most lovely man as my husband.
I would have been happy without a wedding, but it was important to him because his grandparents are in their late 80’s/early 90’s so it was incredible to celebrate for them.
My wedding was $15,000 in 2016. My dad paid $10,000 of it. And we got about $2000 in our honeymoon fund. We picked a venue that was for the ceremony and reception together and they offered everything like a Dj , cake and set up with an open bar! My day was great!! I’m happy I didn’t spend too much
Do you mean your FATHER?
@@darlinspaces yes
@@darlinspaces how rude.
@@ameliaodell9505 she did not find a question that way. Have a great day 😀
Smh
So the reporter used video of her own wedding to write it of as a business expense? xD
🤣
Probably interviewed her friends and co-workers too! LOL
Got engaged in 2020, got overwhelmed with planning a wedding during the pandemic, bought a house in 2021, had a destination elopment wedding with 2 guests in Puerto Rico in 2022. Wouldn't change a thing
We spent around $100 in total 25 years ago ($30 on the documents and the legal signing ritual ; $10 on silver wedding rings; $20 on photos and videotape and the rest was for some food/drinks; we didn’t buy any special outfits for the day). Our video tape got lost and only some photos remained…but we still remember it as if it was yesterday! :))
I lied to my makeup artist and said i am the sister of the bride. I got my makeup in 1/4th the price
I got married last week - and it was really great, I'm so glad we had the wedding party (around 130 guests). From the gifts we got we should pretty much be able to cover our expenses as well, so the cost isn't an issue. I'm glad we didn't elope, though I do wanna say that it's indeed stressful so do not underestimate that. plan for rest and maybe vacation (honeymoon) straight after.
If only couples had spent the time and money to truly get to know each other and work on their differences instead of spending it on their weddings, this world would have been a much better place to live in.
Yup! Couldn't agree more. Me and my husband eloped where we met (Grand Canyon). Took an awesome honeymoon!!
I'm so happy my girlfriend and I spent our twenties in a relationship so we can do it right in our 30s with a wedding because I would have invited 500 people when I was 25 just myself
Not with these divorce rates.
Only been married five years but absolutely happy we didn’t spend tuition on our wedding.
I agree with the wedding being about perspective, personality and your own personal needs. For me, I wouldn’t want to elope but I want to have a small, intimate wedding for friends and family
I love this video so much. Please do a part 2 to feature creative micro weddings , elopement’s, etc!
If you and your family have the luxury to afford a wedding and everything that’s comes with it without being in debt…go ahead and plan that special moment in your life but you better not file for a divorce a few years later 💯💵🤷🏻♂️
I’m an older millennial, my husband and I got married in 2016, my parents spent about $12-15k for the whole wedding. There are definitely ways to cut back on costs. We got our wedding cake from Wal-mart for about $65. One of my husband’s groomsmen was at the time the manager of a fantastic barbecue restaurant, so we got them to do our catering. We purchased our own beer and wine for our guests. My mother is very crafty and did a lot of the decorations. I was active duty at the time, went to the florist at the Navy Exchange and had them do them.
Why you let your parents pay for your wedding. Wow
@@JuancoPRoFlow because they wanted to. It wasn’t an expectation, it was something they’ve wanted to do for a long time. Goodnight.
@@jennifer.martin.48 🤣🤣🤣
@@JuancoPRoFlow Why would anyone want to pay for your wedding?
If anyone is debating if they even want a wedding, listen to your gut! My spouse and I weren't even sure we wanted to have one but succumbed to what our parents wanted. Big regret. We would have much preferred a super small ceremony at the courthouse and saved all the stress, time, and money. Big weddings made sense in our parents' day when it only cost a couple hundred, you had a "village" who raised you, and it was a potluck with little expectations. But now you gotta make your wedding "cool enough" and meet expectations of your aunts and cousins you've seen twice in your life... Screw that. The day is special because of the marriage, not the party!
Im getting married to my SO next year. We have a $600 wedding budget and a $14000 honeymoon budget. We feel like the honeymoon will have waayy better memories than a $30K wedding.
Yaaaas
👏🏽 that's awesome!
how you gonna buy booze for everyone for $600?
I can't say anything about the cost, as it fully depends on the person how much money they think is worth it, but the pressure and stress. THAT is what the wedding party is for. If you are stressed about the schedule and your guests, then your wedding party is not doing their jobs. The bridesmaids are the BRIDES MAIDS. It is their job to make your day as smooth and stress-free as possible.
As Maid of Honor at a wedding, I made sure that the bride was reminded every time she got worried that it is her day, to enjoy it with her new husband, and to send me off to fix anything she starts worrying about.
Of course, this is for a traditional western/american wedding, so I can't speak on those of other cultures, but make sure you have people you trust in your wedding party and don't be afraid to delegate.
As a Wedding Photographer I always tell brides that NOTHING is a must in your wedding. I emphasize true emotional connection, since that's what truly matters. Bring the people you really love, do the things are relevant to you.
You can see my work at wedding media mexico :)
I would not count on making the money back in gifts - to the best of my knowledge that is not the norm, especially for people who don't have a lot of wealthy friends and relatives. Many couples go into debt from wedding expenses.
no couple should go into debt for a wedding, why don't the parents pay for it anymore? we do, hubby and I are old school
Cos some parents can’t afford to pay. My husband and I are paying everything ourselves and we have no expectations of getting any more in return as most family members can’t afford to give anything.
Thank you for being honest.
Have weddings you can truly afford. Whether that’s $100 or $100,000.
Yep. Also, why do so many couples pay for their own wedding? My husband and I pay for our daughters' weddings, just like my parents paid for our wedding, old school. No young couple should go into debt for a big, fancy wedding but why don't the parents help??
I'm in my 30s and having a wedding in December. I did not want a wedding. HOWEVER, I agreed after we turned it into a themed wedding. This made it more fun. We are paying for our own wedding. I'm excited now.
we spent 20k and we don’t regret a single moment from it. We didn’t take out any debt and just saved hard for it. We didn’t spend 20k based on outside influences but it was a collective decision between my wife and I. My point is be intentional with what you’re spending for a wedding. It was our day so it wasn’t about satisfying our guests.
Cool!
It was the best day of my life because it was simple and above everything it was about being present in the ceremony and enjoying the first moments of the rest of our life’s. I can’t comprehend these feelings too please others
My husband and I spent under 10k, and I loved our wedding! Did a lot of DIY, etc… we spent the majority of the budget on the photographer, food, and venue.
People spend 20k on weddings then only to get divorced several years later. Not sound Investment. Me and my wife got a certificate for some fees. 10 years later still married with two kids.
Divorce is the expensive part
Wedding per se is not the issue but the mindset of people. Does a wedding really have to be held in hotels? Can the reception not be held at home to save money? Should guests be in hundreds if there is a budget constraint? Having a wedding is not the issue but people having a materialistic mindset and comparing themselves with friends and peers... that so and so had a great wedding and was held at this and wore this designer dress so mine should be better or at least at par with their wedding celebration. Of course, if people can afford a big and lavish wedding, there is nothing wrong with it as well as it's just a once in a lifetime experience.
Underrated comment
If the guest list was really small, everyone could go to a nice restaurant to eat even.
@@candacedawn357 BUT, some people have big families and lots of friends. We know people who have 6 or 8 kids, add all the spouses and kids and aunts and uncles and grandparents......all special to the couple......the guest list gets big fast!
@@lacee7494 I said if the guest list was small.
WOW, your wedding looks amazing and that dress!! I hope you had a great time. Thanks for sharing those useful thoughts. xo
If I ever get married, I’m going to Vegas to a wedding chapel..lol. I’m not wasting money for one day!😂🤣
Where I’m from, weddings aren’t popular, a lot of couples are unmarried. I’m in a relationship since 21 years, we have children and we are not married and not planning to do so. We did write an agreement in cas of a separation though.
Do you mind sharing where you're from?
Where are you from?
@@shalawndudley2094 Québec 🇨🇦
@@nessparadis6948 Québec 🇨🇦
$2,000 with my flight to my wedding included. We enjoyed our wedding completely!
Where was it? How?
I work part time as a bus driver Saturdays. Just so you know booking a limo/party bus for your wedding costs more maybe even double in some cases than if you do the booking yourself than using event planner. Take it in consideration if you are debating about hiring event planner or not. I guess she will pay for herself by saving you money with everything else not just limo.
My wedding cost $28. We went to Justice for the Peace. We saved the money for the house 20% down. Best decision!!
That sounds absolutely amazing. I congratulate you to a senseful decision ✌🏼 When I think of these crazy expensive weddings and everything that comes with them, it just sounds like nonsense and a waste of money
We used the money for house down payment, the best choice in my life!
Best advice--have your wedding exactly how YOU want. However you and your fiancé want it. Spend all the money If you want. Or don’t. As long as u do it how you want it that’s all that truly matters really
It’s not so much to entertain the guests as a chance to gather your community. A chance to allow others to give and help. It creates meaning and makes your union real to those in your circle. They take ownership of your relationship and will be there for you in future. It is important to invite your loved ones, even just to the courthouse.
My husband and I are millennials and got married at 22y/o. Our wedding cost us $8k and very little of it was actually up to our doing as our family members repeatedly got carried away with themselves on our bank account. The Lutheran church for our athiest wedding cost $500 alone and was booked for a date we hadn't agreed on. We basically just chalked it up as, that was other people's wedding that we got married at.
I stayed in bed for the three weeks after it.
Finally people are realizing weddings are complete BS!!! Look up the history of weddings and your suspicions will be confirmed. I spent $300 on mine and yes granted I married my dog in my moms basement but just goes to show.
😂😂😂
Best comment.
@@orangeziggy348 why thank you kind sir lol
My husband and I spent 3k on our wedding. Ceremony at town hall, a fun party with tons of alcohol, best party ever.
I recall a conversation I had a with a woman who got married in the 1950s; she stated for their wedding it was a small church wedding, and then a reception with just fruit punch and cake served. Weddings didn't become over the top until Princess Diana and Prince Charles from her observation. They wanted to save money for a down payment on a house. She said that her wedding was typical of the day.
I had a 50 person wedding which costed $20K, we ended up getting $15K from my parents and in-laws. We got married at the Santa Barbara courthouse and rented an Inn that doubled as our stay location for some of our guests and used the backyard as the reception area! I ordered flowers online and did a DIY moment and the booze was BYOB. And we had a small wedding party, only the MOH and BM. It was intimate and sweet! And we really got quality time with all of our guests. Totally recommend a smaller wedding!
And even with all you did it still came up to 20k? Wow
@@Traveler-rf8ye Its in California.
I've never had a significant other, and I don't even get invited to weddings. This video made me feel bad 😔
Same as me!
Especially when couples are already living together, sharing bills and even kids… the wedding is only a party not even a personal milestone.