people get banned from image boards all the time, there are so many tutorials to go around a range ban for example. 4chan is the most normie known chan, there aren’t criminals and degenerates posting illegal stuff and bomb tutorials. You can get banned for simple spam, for example.
@@bendykid4908 literally just for being an attention whore and not posting on topic. calm down. She was postig about personal issues and venting on /f/ - a board for flash, not for anyones personal issues. Just read the rules and you will know why you might get banned
Tbf NSFW doesn't always mean porn, it's just a term for content with elements unsuitable for a social setting, like blood and gore, so Vivzie really did follow her advice.
I seriously doubt Viv would just blindly take the advice of an artist who was clearly off her rocker. Plus she previously stated that her dirty and dark sense of humor mostly comes from watching shows like South Park growing up.
@@Cure_Hanathey mean that it’s just ironic, and let’s not forget that emily was still a minor during her early fame and (maybe?) magcon days. it was kinda disappointing to not see viv stand up for a kid:/
the alfred's playhouse "fandom" is a slippery slope. it goes from people enjoying the art, but despising the artist, to literal nazis and necrophiliacs. it's especially bad on tiktok, once i found someone who made alfreds playhouse self insert ocs and had drawings of them doing stuff to dead bodies. it's jarring to see how quickly people can fall down these rabbitholes because of the internet, though i understand what it's like because it has almost happened to me. the internet is an awful place.
I’m in the fandom and Ofcourse like any fandom it has it’s fair share of really bad people but I honestly love the community. people in the community are really kind and have a lot of mutals on tiktok aswell as I’m in a few discord servers (don’t recommend though since I’ve heard gr00ming is common there since there are easy target since mainly the reason why people like aph is because they relate or find comfort within the show (Mainly SA which is one of the things I experienced as a kid)
@@creamcakecoffee what do ppl in the fandom rlly do tho? I’ve seen a few ocs, but what’s the appeal of making ocs for media that is very dark in nature like this? No hate, genuinely curious!
@@puckkrz01I'd image they make that art either to be edgy, out of random interest in doing so, or because they genuinely as bad as what they like and genuinely want to express for attention or something along those lines, which in my opinion makes sense because if you like something or someone fucked up you yourself have to be fucked up just as badly or nearly as badly.
@@user-nz2bp8xk5l why would you reply this. I am genuinely so confused how does it tie to the comment 😭😭😭😭 why did you make me remember they fucking comic 😭😭😭
Dude I'm just starting the video and this comment is getting me ready, where the dead go to die, something i haven't heard in years unless it's me talking about it
Alfred Alfer is my favorite niche internet thing. It’s terrible but important to learn about the rabbit hole that made Emily what she is today and how her ignored cries for help drove her to seek community with alt right weirdos, it’s a lot more common nowadays than people would like to admit
I went down the alt-right pipeline but it spat me out for being a degenerate but I still hate a lot of the same kind of stuff I did at the Shen Bapiro stage so I'm pretty much sandwiched in between two groups I hate, interacting with members of both and trying to ignore my acute awareness that they are what they are, occasionally being pleasantly surprised when someone isn't as bad as I thought they were or are even like me. I don't have trauma, though, which is probably why I haven't gone full stormfront daught kom
This is why therapy should be readily accessible. Anyway somehow I'm reminded of something I heard a long time ago. "To a simple-minded child, all support comes from good people, with good intentions. They cannot understand that someone can reach out to cure their loneliness, but poison them in a thousand other ways."
It's a bit horrifying how similar my situation was to Emily's. I fell into the alt-right pipeline at around the same time because I had childhood trauma and undiagnosed mental illness, and I felt isolated from progressive spaces because I felt that they ignored me and my struggles. I got the help I needed and got out, but it's scary seeing a video essay of the type of person who I would have been if I weren't so lucky. As irredeemable as she has become, a small part of me still hopes she comes out of it eventually.
The alt left pipeline exists too though, but can be more toxic bc it’s so enabled and denied as similarly destructive . Detransitioners are some of the few who discuss it sanely.
Same, but I seriously doubt it she is in too deep. Even if she left her baby daddy is still a devout nazi and she herself was pretty influential in that community, so I doubt they'd ever let her live that down.
From the beginning she has been attempting to appease and gain acceptance/fans among extremely edgy communities online. I think she has fully immersed herself in newgrounds, 4chan, etc. the entire time she has been online and molded her personality to impress them so much and so by extension the extreme political beliefs of those circles are now core a part of her personality. It's the only place that will accept her at this point, so she will double down forever and eternally spiral into her conspiracies and hatred for minorities along with the rest of those in that space. I have a personal theory based on her posts, behavior, and things I've seen in her animations that her sense of self is heavily tied to her relationships to others and she has an obsession with getting positive attention from hateful and edgy individuals. It's kind of sad and pathetic in a way. The people she wants approval from often look down on her, don't respect her, and treat her like a joke. I think in her mind, if she can get people who are so insensitive and give praise and love so conditionally to like her that must mean something and make her special.
Emily’s story is just really upsetting, because I feel like if more people stepped in or if she reached out for professional help, maybe things would have been different. All I can say is that I feel bad for the children of Emily and her gross husband. Thinking about how those kids could very likely have similar views to their parents once they grow up really scares me. Edit: Regarding the “if more people stepped in or if she reached out for professional help” portion, while I can’t say for latter, for the former, I have been informed people did actually. (I suggest reading the comment thread below this).
The children are highly likely to also be abused and Emily will call it "tough love" or "traditional discipline". Worse is if the very traumatic things that happened to Emily also happen to her children, creating a harmful cycle.
Yeah. I left another comment. I'm sorry I absolutely sounded hostile but I really, really wish people would try to seek out victims of people before doing vids. She knew me as "Stripe" on Facebook. I was close friends w/ her for years (Though she did also groom me.)
It's so weird to me that even though Emily doesn't have DID, she had protrayed a few things that happened to me in terms of alters or switching and being hazy. Dicator Pickles is a (very glorified) version of a persecutor. And, even though people say that they are the evil alter, they can cause you to trust them through a means of lovebombing. They are seemed to be misunderstood and use their way of getting things as a means of protection. When i first watched the three episodes of Alfred's Playhouse, i felt an odd sense of comfort in just Alfred. Not the rest of the show, not the creator. Just Alfred. He acted like me as a kid when i had to deal with some triggering topics no kid should have gone through. Sure, i didn't cause a murder but in terms of outbursts in emotion, it was on the T. Its hard to explain really.
Emilys saga has always been so interesting to me. Her animations of Alfred are scarily accurate to how people (such as myself) feel during these kinds of mental breakdowns. She was surprisingly in touch with herself and her emotions (albeit sometimes negatively) and I think it’s a shame she went down the path she did. She clearly wasn’t in the right mindset, and I think that community took advantage of that. Also, the tiktok “fandom” enrages me so much, but I digress.
i absolutely agree, I think that having a fandom over what's basically vent art for someone who's dealing with a lot is just really weird. It's odd to see that they're making a fandom out of something like this, and even if there's reasons such as finding a community that you can confine in, a rabbit hole like this isn't actually going to be a place MEANT to find help but rather dwell and fester in ones own mental spiral. I've been in groups similar, and even if it's good to find people who understand, you're not actually getting help because they're just as troubled as you are. in reality, you're just surrounded by a community that's not healthy and you're not getting the help you need. Plus, some people are just into it for the sake of liking the "edgy content", and that's a whole other topic that specifically makes me frustrated to think about. Yikes overall
@@mushroomphrogs3941 I guess i should be glad that im in a fandom that isn't based around something disturbing, even if the fandom im in is about a popular comment thread. I usually joke about how the hell did a youtube argument thread gained a fandom of its own, but i agree with the fact that a fandom that comes from a vent art is kind of... too odd to say the least. No offense to the ones who are in the fandom, this is just my opinion. Making a fandom out of very disturbing vent art is a whole another level, although i wouldn't generalize every person in that fandom is terrible, since i could understand that theres going to be some people that finds genuine comfort in it. However, if a fandom is made out of something disturbing, then i think its doomed to have more creeps that will take advantage of that fact.
@@Wolfiexero It gained a massive modding community after week 6 and attains that to this day, reached critical mass, became cringe in the eyes of the public, lots of people known in its community did horrible things.
@@heavygunner4039 it's really just spread out way past the confines of the original game and it's been more or less coopted by kids to make their own stuff. which is fine, honestly, people just see kids making stuff and think its cringe lol, we did the same stuff in like 2010.
Quick note, her mentioning her excessive usage of weed is scary, as weed is known to induce psychosis in people with severe mental disorders such as schizophrenia.
as a csa victim, the playhouse is extremely and painfully relatable, even pretending having a different person in your place, or pretend nothing ever happened, though triggers completely collide your world again. I was also a victim of my father, and some of the deranged things shown in Alfred’s playhouse (sh to get attention and thinking that it was deserved) I find in myself. I do not condone Emily’s behavior, but I can sympathize for her. As of now, I am still trying to heal, and I hope I can learn from this and hopefully grow.
What is upsetting is that this series is a genuinely troubling psychological horror, with a lot of artistic choices genuinely being good at portraying panic attacks, overstimulation, trauma, Dissociation, SA, and even DID at times.
I’ve scrolled through the comments, but haven’t seen anyone mention it, so: the warning about the movie’s depiction of necro**ilia, gore, and SA is at 44:54, but recommends to skip to 35:37, which is earlier in the video. To skip the entire movie segment, go to 50:46.
I feel like I could make a joke connecting Emily with H.P. Lovecraft, but my Yithian partner says that it is too soon. I'll come back in a century to say it.
It's so disheartening to see people like Emily; as someone who was in a similar situation as her, it's also a bit horrifying how I might have turned out like her if the dice rolled a bit differently and I didn't get the help I needed.
its always terrifying seeing internet cases that really resonate with you at the beginning before diving into the deep end. really gives a lot of perspective about how some small key things can completely change your trajectory in life.
I just hope people who are similarly traumatized and don't have access to the resources they need, know that they don't have to turn out like her. They can choose to be better people than her, in spite of all of the suffering they endured. The cycle of trauma doesn't have to be continued.
Learning about a infamous person the internet and their derogatory webtoon which involved some of the worst subject matter I've ever heard of while simultaneously witnessing the pyrocynical tf2 clip for the 34th time. THIS.. is the content I signed up for, thanks Quinnamon
Another detail I’d like to add is that Emily was once in a relationship with Jimmy Screamerclauz, and made Alfred’s Surprise after their breakup, which is probably why she used his character Labby in that animation who is depicted abandoning Alfred. She uses the soundtrack from the Land before Time in that video too, which she says was the last movie she watched with Jimmy. Further proof that the Alfred animations are probably just a projection of herself. Heres the podcast where she says all this: czcams.com/video/gBbzigrHt_E/video.htmlsi=EPDj4O5qjFjD1uAb
i almost cried midway through the video bc of 1. the whole "i hurt myself because this is the only way people show concern about me" thing, and the bit about pickles taking over everytime something traumatic happens so that alfred may live without it. im not a trauma holder myself, but i am an alter in a system, and i am not the og host. so i get it, sort of. and the whole s/h thing. i dont really self harm, havent for 2 years. but i understand the feeling that you have to have something major happen for people to show concern. because you're isolated, and you get so used to the people around you just knowing the carefully curated version of you who has no problems, and is much more mentally stable than you actually are. you start to believe that the people around you arent going to care unless you find a way to make them see how much you're suffering. i dont ever plan on actually enacting any harm on myself. but i get the urge sometimes.
I absolutely can understand this feeling, even if our experiences are different. The urge is always going to linger, but I promise it gets better. Sometimes you're in a place where you don't realize that, but I promise as someone who was once there that things do change and you do grow bigger around that circle of grief, pain, and isolation. I wish you well, and thank you for sharing this even if you just wanted to get something out there. It's a vulnerable thing to admit
As someone with DID (formerly called Multiple Personality Disorder) this is unfortunately not much worse than the average media depiction of it which is usually just "oo scary serial killer alter"
Hey fellow system! I’m hopeful we can get some positive did rep soon, even the best did rep I’ve seen in the majoritypublic (moonknight) involves an alter who kills people fora living. Did systems literally just CHILL and VIBE I don’t understand why people are so convinced we beat ass for a living 😭😭😭 do they realize that the severe childhood trauma we experience will most likely prevent us from being abusive, and the cases like this are so rare that it shouldn’t even be considered for the entire did community. I could talk about this allday lmao 😭😭😭 nice to meet you!
@@mj-sw2nh Yeah, its wild. Ultimately I know it's just reflective of the typical ableist trope of oo mentally ill person is evil and crazy but still its like. We're the way we are because of trauma, why would we want to impart that kinda pain onto others out of nowhere?
@@Senkoki I don’t have DID, but I can say that sometimes people overlook how offensive something is because it doesn’t affect them, or they won’t see it from the other groups perspective. Have you seen how we treated Japanese people back in the early days of the internet, a lot of people were just treating them as extension of themselves into “Japanese culture”, by that I mean anime. Sorry that we represent you in that way, but we would never do it intentionally
The way i paused what i was drawing when you called out artists who use these types of videos for background ambience like ive never been so scared drawing objects on ibispaintx
Yes, I’m able to understand the Alfred’s Playhouse trilogy for what it is while acknowledging that it’s also just terrible and disgusting and the actual worst thing ever. But it’s so real and just so raw in an unforgiving way that I’m disgusted with myself for how much I can relate to such an awful thing. It messed me up bad for like a week after seeing it and still messes with me to this day and I regret ever watching it and learning more, but I feel that I needed to in a way. It’s helped me understand myself a bit better but of course, that’s not enough to justify its existence or make it ok. But still.
@@aesiro13 Completely valid concern and I appreciate you saying it but just to clarify I do NOT relate in any way to the terrible things she’s done/said and only ever related to theme of trauma from childhood SA in I do NOT agree with any of her opinions or think they’re ok ❌
This video has been so weird and disheartening to watch. I grew up on newgrounds and I remember watching Emily’s animations. I never dug deep into who she was and just let my too edgy and desensitized teenage boy brain laugh at what was on the screen. It’s so jarring seeing someone I used to watch have such horrible and bigoted beliefs, but I understand how it happens. Being in those spaces can easily lead to falling down the alt right pipeline, especially at that time. I made it out, but it’s a reminder that a lot of others didn’t. Keep in touch with your friends guys, isolation and seeking validation leaves you *very* open to bad actors. Ask them how they’re doing, be a good actor in their life, your support and voice can be all the difference sometimes. ❤️
I feel... God I feel horrible finding out about this. I nearly, NEARLY fell down the same rabbit hole she did and I'm so relieved I avoided it in the end. As a result though I can't help but wish she would have been able to avoid it too. There's something about that sort of absurdly over-the-top offensive way of making art I enjoy, how someone can just let loose and be as vile and gross as they want to be to make a point. It almost guarantees the people who may need to see it will stick around and people who don't will leave quickly. Knowing just a little of what happened to her and of how that came out through her work... It tears me up.
This was fantastically done and I hope this gets far more views. If it helps, the algorithm actually recommended it to me so you're doing something right! Subscribed because of it
@@amusingmoose9924 There's a lot of other debased works like this out there, they're just understandably not talked about often. It's a valid method of expression and can be done in a healthy way, just not one that's liked by a lot of people haha
The audible "oh no..." I let out as CZcams recommended me this... I used to love her work, because it really did portray just how isolation and being easily overstimulated can feel just... like a nightmare. I drew her some fanart back in the day, she even asked me hey I love this, do you do animation because I'm looking for volunteers for the Alfred Alfer movie, I told her that sadly not but I can contribute some drawings; she never got back to me. Sure wouldn't want to work with her nowadays... "I needed to do some research, so I went on /pol" oh nooo...
I am currently aggressively drawing The Binding of Isaac characters (and a lot of mlp) Thank you so very much. Though that was scary being acknowledged.
Honestly I just feel really bad for Emily as dark as her art is she really did have a talent If only she could have got the help she needed who knows what her art would be like by now.
Call me a sensitive content viewer or extremely sympathetic/empathetic person, but I'm starting to realize my biggest trigger is cartoon dog characters being portrayed as necrophiles/serial killers/evil people. Ever since seeing "Ren Seeks Help", this type of portrayal in cartoon dogs just makes my stomach churn. Like obviously I don't mind seeing a cartoon dog be a villain like in a kid friendly cartoon way, but once they start doing visually unpleasant things, I draw a line.
@@torytellstales I'm not an easily triggered person, but I totally get where you're coming from. I watched Ren Seeks Help at a young age since I was (and still kinda am) a Ren & Stimpy fan, but that episode really rubbed me the wrong way back then, even now it really freaks me out
I completely get it,as a child those "haunted" animatronic toy dolls/teddy bears used to send me straight to tears and they still make me uneasy idk what it is about seeing such cute things made evil for the sake of it makes me uncomfortable
Ah yes, Emily: The classic cautionary tale on how edge can go too far Honestly, the internet was probably the worst environment for her to be in general, let alone the Wild West era where slurs and bile were being thrown around like candy. The internet was always a dumpster fire, even long before social media made it worse.
emily and alfred fascinate me. emily might not *have* d.i.d.- but as someone who was diagnosed late in life that also projected through art long before that diagnosis was ever considered, it. is very reminiscent of that. alfred is very very clearly a vessel for something emily is dealing with, whether or not She is aware of the depths of it all.
The way Emily talked about making the Albert movie almost reminds me of how Grant Morrison talks about the making of a hypersigil but in reverse, refusing to let it out so that the power remains until the moment its released. Interesting to learn about a creator going down a very bad rabbit hole of nonsense and how it can latch onto ones' mental illness, especially in echo chambers of other weirdos like /pol/, looking forward to seeing more content!
The craziest part of Emily’s life to me is how she managed to get kicked out of a friend group that included both the co-creator of Smiling Friends and fucking shadman???
With the way she writes, emily is clearly a smart person, and the clear air of intelligence present in each passage we get from her adds so much to her story
I relate to Alfred so much that he was somewhat comforting to me, and unfortunately I still somewhat do. Knowing about Emily has ruined it for me and made it impossible for me to find solace in Alfred, all I can feel is guilt for my draw to him and the series. I’m deeply ashamed of how I feel towards Alfred and wish Emily got help
There is nothing wrong with relating to the work a creator creates, no matter how twisted and heinous that creator is. We're all humans, and it's easy to see ourselves even in horrible people. But does that mean we are them? Not at all. I understand what it's like to feel ashamed and embarrassed when you find yourself deeply relating to the creations that someone terrible produces. But that doesn't mean you yourself are a terrible person. Nor does it mean you are supporting their toxicity. What's important, above all else, is knowing to not go down the path that the creator did. Seeking comfort in toxic, cult ideologies that slowly drag you in until you're completely enveloped. As long as you're aware of that: there will never be anything wrong with consuming and relating to media created by terrible people that you acknowledge are horrible.
Weird shit aside its actually incredible how quick she picked up animation and how good she got at it for 15. Teens in the 2000s/2010s were built different when it came to animation
The "hi you who just puts my videos on the background while drawing" called me out so hard that I subbed (I am drawing some graffiti to decorate my sketchbook, thanks for the acknowledgement it scared me
I feel like I could’ve ended up like Emily. I was really edgy since the age 12 because of past traumatic experiences and things got worse after 13 with lockdown and other traumas. I was falling off the deep end and I often found comfort in being over the top edgy. Looking back at myself I can tell that I wasn’t a good person, I wasn’t a bad one either but I did some stuff I’m not proud of, I was very manipulative. The thing that saved me was my phone and my IPad breaking at the same time, not even joking. For a whole year I had little to no access to the internet due to my family not doing too great financially, but in that time I think I discovered myself, a better version of me. On one hand I’m really sorry for Emily and how her trauma turned in the worst version of herself, on the other I know that wasn’t the only possible outcome, I may be childish but I hope she gets some senses back, and I hope her kids grow up better.
It’s really a shame, I actually like a lot of the jokes for what they are in these animations. Like the movie having “Where the Dead Go To Die” and “Where the Dead Go To Drink” is honestly really funny
There’s a ton of comments, so I doubt this one will be noticed, but as somebody who has watched Alfred’s Playhouse I’d like to thank you for not completely demonizing it and its fans. I have Partial DID, which is essentially regular DID but lacking consisting switching. We(me and other alters) switch hosts(main alters), very rarely and few others front often unless they preform an important task or have some incentive to do so. Our past host watched the series around two years ago, and it definitely resonates with us a lot. None of us know what trauma we’ve gone through, just the consequences of it. But obviously somebody had to take the fall for it, just like Pickles in Alfred’s Playhouse. We have an inner world that doesn’t follow real world logic and there’s a lot of violence and harmful actions though not anywhere near the severity or seriousness as portrayed in AP. We haven’t watched the series itself since the first time and don’t plan on it, but it’s honestly even easier to relate now. The same past host after switching off has grown very self isolating and borderline abusive. He was involved closely in an online cult that convinced him he was a godlike figure, which while sounding not so serious was incredibly harmful to us as an already traumatized system at 14. My last interaction with him was downright scary and I wish never to repeat it. It is very important to know this is not normal for people with dissociative disorders, and it was most likely just our unique circumstances resulting in this. But the image of a power hungry, hateful, and abusive alter who was effectively locked away in an inner world of sorts definitely is relatable to us. Though thankfully most of it is completely irrelevant to our own experiences. I doubt Emily meant to make an accurate representation of dissociative disorders, but this is definitely better than most purposeful representation. I do feel like AP and Alfred as a character himself can be “enjoyed” without being necessarily nazis like a lot of people say. Most likely just view it as shock material while others like myself oddly see themselves in it. It’s horribly grotesque and disgusting media, but sometimes people need that to actually find solace with their own trauma. I do feel weird about having a fandom center around it whether it was meant to be enjoyable or not, but the fans aren’t inherently bad people. I’m not a fan of it myself, but many are just flawed and hurt people who benefit seeing a character this absurdly crazy and traumatized. Thank you.
I panicked when i heard “jesus christ (corn) star”, i’m a huge fan of Jesus Christ Superstar (even planning on watching it live in Australia) and my goodness that shooked me to my core 😭
As a older gen whos been around on the internet for a long time. It saddening how many young people- shit people in general. I will come across, making some of the most awful art (not as in style but as in substance.) An how some of the people are actually just screaming into the void from pain. Needing some form of help that will not come until way later or not at all.( An other are just hateful and spitting nothing but venom.) I had hoped Emily would get help. Its so easy for people with bad intentions or bad ideals to root themsleves into the minds of someone who fragile. Her actions now are unforgivable she a full adult. An while I'll mourn the child making edgy cartoons online. I have no sympathy for the adult alt righter. Who dislike poc like myself. In a way she got what she so desperatly was crying out for.
At one point I talked to her and commissioned art from her. This is how my pitbull fursona came to be. I do NOT and NEVER will share the same political views as her. My character was created by chance. I have no plan on getting rid of her. I am separating the art from the artist. And no, this art in my profile pic is not what Emily drew. But what she DID draw was just a cute picture of Blueberry and Alfred sitting by a fireplace. That's it. No politics or anything disgusting. I stopped talking to Emily and will not engage with her again.
@@codeinexrist Yeah, I guess. To be honest I was afraid of mentioning any of this because people tend to like to take things out of proportion. They like to go over the top and assume things of people who had interacted with certain people in the past. As I said before, I do not share the same views as her. In fact, sometimes I want to go to her socials and tell her that she is wrong and she should really reconsider her views. But it is better to not poke the bear. (So to speak).
Omg I’ve actually watched another CZcams video about this so it’s very interesting to see someone else talking about it, just started but know this is gonna be a dozy
Love your videos, it’s a kind I can’t find anywhere else where it goes over an entire series and pops in on the creator themself to give both sides full context
Emily did not deserve this....Alfred did not deserve this...and honestly despite how awful he might be and how painful his voice is to listen to...i kind of liked him...he is tragic...his creator is tragic...everything is tragic...
I first watched alfred back in high school and its kind of stuck with me since. my art ive come to realize has some traits in common with youcis and its something I would think about every once in a while. I find it thematically ironic that emily ended up falling into the worst crowd and saying horrible things for, lets me real now, attention and affection. The far right offered her a place of praise and attention as long as she does and says bad shit, and she ate the figurative dog bone; ruining her life and reputation for the sake of feeling seen and loved (even if its not genuine affection).
@@ShyloTheFox I mean if you want you can no one can really police what you watch, for me it portrays distress and trauma pretty accurately, (for me) and that’s what makes it really nerve wracking
Out of all videos I've seen about this topic, this is by far the best one, a full on telling of all the events and the past of Emily herself well explained and a hell of a great edition, great job
This doesn't have anything to do with Emily or her work but I've watched two of your videos so far and I'm really glad that you're not secretive about being a victim of sexual trauma, especially CSA. I hate that I can't even talk about my experiences without being seen as venting or trauma dumping, even if I just mention my trauma where it's relevant and in a completely neutral manner. It makes people so uncomfortable that CSA victims (at least in my experience/with people I've talked to) are frequently told (directly or indirectly, intentionally or unintentionally) to not talk about their trauma, which just leads to more of us feeling isolated, unsupported, and alone. So, it's good to hear someone else casually mentioning/talking about their own trauma, especially on a widely public video. More people need to talk about it, so more people realize how sickeningly common it actually is, and more can be done to stop it. I hate how it happens to you when you don't have a voice, and then by the time you're old enough to finally talk about it, people ask you why you aren't over it yet, it was so many years ago...
exactly, mental breakdowns leave you so susceptible to falling into alt right stuff. some people also theorized that he went crazy after seeing a specific therapist 1 time. Who knows what happened. The same thing happened to a former soldier who was court assigned a therapist and he went crazy after 1 session.
Hearing someone talk about Alfred’s playhouse makes me so sad because you can see glimpses of a good idea. I was assaulted as a child and while I’ve never actually watched Alfred’s playhouse, seeing you describe it sounds so familiar. Being forced to rely on media to dissociate and separate yourself from the reality of what happened or regressing into a childlike state to stifle a panic attack is exactly what I do all the time. It’s really on point and it’s a shame that the idea wasn’t used differently. It could have ended up being really therapeutic for some many people. More so than it already is.
Be sure to get your very own Quinn plush!!! After two weeks he’s GONE FOREVER!!! www.ownaj.com/collections/plushies/products/quinn-plush
Ok
I'm sorry but how do you get banned from fucking 4chan.
That's kinda impressive
@@obnoxious_efe420 seriously, it is
people get banned from image boards all the time, there are so many tutorials to go around a range ban for example. 4chan is the most normie known chan, there aren’t criminals and degenerates posting illegal stuff and bomb tutorials. You can get banned for simple spam, for example.
I don't know but it must've been something awful.
@@bendykid4908 literally just for being an attention whore and not posting on topic. calm down. She was postig about personal issues and venting on /f/ - a board for flash, not for anyones personal issues. Just read the rules and you will know why you might get banned
the fear when i put this on in the background while i draw and being acknowledged for it
I'm drawing right now too 👁👄👁 Although I actually often watch while drawing (I have my phone nearby as I listen, so I can glance and see it slightly)
same
Mood
ME FR
actual jumpscare-
i was drawing and when quinn said that i got startled
In all this, her telling Vivziepop to make NSFW to boost her career is just peak comedy. In a way she ended up taking that advice, which is hysterical
Tbf NSFW doesn't always mean porn, it's just a term for content with elements unsuitable for a social setting, like blood and gore, so Vivzie really did follow her advice.
@@aesiro13 im sorry but vivzie's works have got NOTHING on Emily Youcis in terms of fucked up-ness
@@mingotproductions1335 Doesn't really change my point but ok :|
I seriously doubt Viv would just blindly take the advice of an artist who was clearly off her rocker. Plus she previously stated that her dirty and dark sense of humor mostly comes from watching shows like South Park growing up.
@@Cure_Hanathey mean that it’s just ironic, and let’s not forget that emily was still a minor during her early fame and (maybe?) magcon days. it was kinda disappointing to not see viv stand up for a kid:/
the alfred's playhouse "fandom" is a slippery slope. it goes from people enjoying the art, but despising the artist, to literal nazis and necrophiliacs. it's especially bad on tiktok, once i found someone who made alfreds playhouse self insert ocs and had drawings of them doing stuff to dead bodies. it's jarring to see how quickly people can fall down these rabbitholes because of the internet, though i understand what it's like because it has almost happened to me. the internet is an awful place.
youtube animator ANALBONES is a good example of this 😬 im very worried about him.
the internet boosts the hell out of a whole lot of voices that should absolutely not be in the limelight
I’m in the fandom and Ofcourse like any fandom it has it’s fair share of really bad people but I honestly love the community. people in the community are really kind and have a lot of mutals on tiktok aswell as I’m in a few discord servers (don’t recommend though since I’ve heard gr00ming is common there since there are easy target since mainly the reason why people like aph is because they relate or find comfort within the show (Mainly SA which is one of the things I experienced as a kid)
@@creamcakecoffee what do ppl in the fandom rlly do tho? I’ve seen a few ocs, but what’s the appeal of making ocs for media that is very dark in nature like this? No hate, genuinely curious!
@@puckkrz01I'd image they make that art either to be edgy, out of random interest in doing so, or because they genuinely as bad as what they like and genuinely want to express for attention or something along those lines, which in my opinion makes sense because if you like something or someone fucked up you yourself have to be fucked up just as badly or nearly as badly.
Did not expect to see that many warnings at the start then a minute later hear Skibidi toilet
Gotta catch 'em all
there shouldve been a warning for that aswell /j
yeah
@@alankiittyHello there Dave Strider from the hit webcomic Homestuck
fnaf blueycapsules AU
So the person that made Where the Dead go to Die was friends with Emily who made Alfred Alfer... Not gonna lie this literally explains EVERYTHING.
He was actually her ex.
Oh that movie was freakin nuts got it for my brothers birthday
fnaf blueycapsules AU
@@user-nz2bp8xk5l why would you reply this. I am genuinely so confused how does it tie to the comment 😭😭😭😭 why did you make me remember they fucking comic 😭😭😭
Dude I'm just starting the video and this comment is getting me ready, where the dead go to die, something i haven't heard in years unless it's me talking about it
Alfred Alfer is my favorite niche internet thing. It’s terrible but important to learn about the rabbit hole that made Emily what she is today and how her ignored cries for help drove her to seek community with alt right weirdos, it’s a lot more common nowadays than people would like to admit
I hate it.
for real, especially for lonely young men
Its almost like they're normal.
@@GameGuy667 if you're normal why don't you have 100 subscribers at least
I went down the alt-right pipeline but it spat me out for being a degenerate but I still hate a lot of the same kind of stuff I did at the Shen Bapiro stage so I'm pretty much sandwiched in between two groups I hate, interacting with members of both and trying to ignore my acute awareness that they are what they are, occasionally being pleasantly surprised when someone isn't as bad as I thought they were or are even like me.
I don't have trauma, though, which is probably why I haven't gone full stormfront daught kom
This is why therapy should be readily accessible.
Anyway somehow I'm reminded of something I heard a long time ago.
"To a simple-minded child, all support comes from good people, with good intentions. They cannot understand that someone can reach out to cure their loneliness, but poison them in a thousand other ways."
Therapy isn't a *fix* when all it is a tool to beat people into a mold. It's fascist and racist and ablist.
@@Emperor-Quill
She's fine.
Probably healthier than you
It's a bit horrifying how similar my situation was to Emily's. I fell into the alt-right pipeline at around the same time because I had childhood trauma and undiagnosed mental illness, and I felt isolated from progressive spaces because I felt that they ignored me and my struggles. I got the help I needed and got out, but it's scary seeing a video essay of the type of person who I would have been if I weren't so lucky. As irredeemable as she has become, a small part of me still hopes she comes out of it eventually.
The alt left pipeline exists too though, but can be more toxic bc it’s so enabled and denied as similarly destructive . Detransitioners are some of the few who discuss it sanely.
@tablescissors67 JESUS CHRIST you're spamming comments dude 😭 get better soon
Same, but I seriously doubt it she is in too deep. Even if she left her baby daddy is still a devout nazi and she herself was pretty influential in that community, so I doubt they'd ever let her live that down.
From the beginning she has been attempting to appease and gain acceptance/fans among extremely edgy communities online. I think she has fully immersed herself in newgrounds, 4chan, etc. the entire time she has been online and molded her personality to impress them so much and so by extension the extreme political beliefs of those circles are now core a part of her personality.
It's the only place that will accept her at this point, so she will double down forever and eternally spiral into her conspiracies and hatred for minorities along with the rest of those in that space.
I have a personal theory based on her posts, behavior, and things I've seen in her animations that her sense of self is heavily tied to her relationships to others and she has an obsession with getting positive attention from hateful and edgy individuals. It's kind of sad and pathetic in a way. The people she wants approval from often look down on her, don't respect her, and treat her like a joke. I think in her mind, if she can get people who are so insensitive and give praise and love so conditionally to like her that must mean something and make her special.
Other people mentioned she was already like that beforehand; she chose to become worse
i do actually have you playing in the background while i draw. you cant just call me out like this
real
halyar
# of people who care
👇
@@christophercampbell6884 382 people and counting clearly.
@@-PanPan- I liked the comment too
Emily’s story is just really upsetting, because I feel like if more people stepped in or if she reached out for professional help, maybe things would have been different. All I can say is that I feel bad for the children of Emily and her gross husband. Thinking about how those kids could very likely have similar views to their parents once they grow up really scares me.
Edit: Regarding the “if more people stepped in or if she reached out for professional help” portion, while I can’t say for latter, for the former, I have been informed people did actually. (I suggest reading the comment thread below this).
The children are highly likely to also be abused and Emily will call it "tough love" or "traditional discipline". Worse is if the very traumatic things that happened to Emily also happen to her children, creating a harmful cycle.
@@devofficialchannel That possibility is just as scary to think about too.
We did. We tried to pull her out. She promised she'd stop reading alt right stuff and get out of the pipline but didnt. She chose to be racist.
@@Wulfums Jesus, I’m so sorry, dumb question but are you a former friend of hers?
Yeah. I left another comment. I'm sorry I absolutely sounded hostile but I really, really wish people would try to seek out victims of people before doing vids.
She knew me as "Stripe" on Facebook. I was close friends w/ her for years (Though she did also groom me.)
It's so weird to me that even though Emily doesn't have DID, she had protrayed a few things that happened to me in terms of alters or switching and being hazy.
Dicator Pickles is a (very glorified) version of a persecutor. And, even though people say that they are the evil alter, they can cause you to trust them through a means of lovebombing. They are seemed to be misunderstood and use their way of getting things as a means of protection.
When i first watched the three episodes of Alfred's Playhouse, i felt an odd sense of comfort in just Alfred. Not the rest of the show, not the creator. Just Alfred. He acted like me as a kid when i had to deal with some triggering topics no kid should have gone through. Sure, i didn't cause a murder but in terms of outbursts in emotion, it was on the T.
Its hard to explain really.
You know what they say, "The bigger they are, the harder they fall"
I thought this saying was about cocks lmao
Unless your ukulele girl
This biggidy boy’s a diggity dog
@@Wroar2020s true
fnaf blueycapsules AU
Emilys saga has always been so interesting to me. Her animations of Alfred are scarily accurate to how people (such as myself) feel during these kinds of mental breakdowns. She was surprisingly in touch with herself and her emotions (albeit sometimes negatively) and I think it’s a shame she went down the path she did. She clearly wasn’t in the right mindset, and I think that community took advantage of that.
Also, the tiktok “fandom” enrages me so much, but I digress.
Yeah, Alfred's playhouse is not something that should have a fandom...
It really made me so shocked on how accurate the breakdowns and other things were, especially the sa depiction. It’s so on point.
i absolutely agree, I think that having a fandom over what's basically vent art for someone who's dealing with a lot is just really weird. It's odd to see that they're making a fandom out of something like this, and even if there's reasons such as finding a community that you can confine in, a rabbit hole like this isn't actually going to be a place MEANT to find help but rather dwell and fester in ones own mental spiral. I've been in groups similar, and even if it's good to find people who understand, you're not actually getting help because they're just as troubled as you are. in reality, you're just surrounded by a community that's not healthy and you're not getting the help you need. Plus, some people are just into it for the sake of liking the "edgy content", and that's a whole other topic that specifically makes me frustrated to think about. Yikes overall
Community? What neo-nazi community? If you were on /POL/ you’d realize no one there can agree on anything.
@@mushroomphrogs3941 I guess i should be glad that im in a fandom that isn't based around something disturbing, even if the fandom im in is about a popular comment thread. I usually joke about how the hell did a youtube argument thread gained a fandom of its own, but i agree with the fact that a fandom that comes from a vent art is kind of... too odd to say the least. No offense to the ones who are in the fandom, this is just my opinion.
Making a fandom out of very disturbing vent art is a whole another level, although i wouldn't generalize every person in that fandom is terrible, since i could understand that theres going to be some people that finds genuine comfort in it.
However, if a fandom is made out of something disturbing, then i think its doomed to have more creeps that will take advantage of that fact.
"The wreched rhythm game" is fucking hillarious
I'm out of the loop, I played up to week 5, what happened with said wretched rhythm game?
@@Wolfiexerobasically most of the developers and mod makers for the game are horrible people and groomers
@@Wolfiexero It gained a massive modding community after week 6 and attains that to this day, reached critical mass, became cringe in the eyes of the public, lots of people known in its community did horrible things.
@@heavygunner4039 it's really just spread out way past the confines of the original game and it's been more or less coopted by kids to make their own stuff. which is fine, honestly, people just see kids making stuff and think its cringe lol, we did the same stuff in like 2010.
I heard her say that, and was like "Eeeh... Them's fightin' words". 😹
Quick note, her mentioning her excessive usage of weed is scary, as weed is known to induce psychosis in people with severe mental disorders such as schizophrenia.
Rip Daggz for having to edit all of this. I hope his eyes and mind are in peace
It was definitely an experience 😭
@@Daggz
Hope you’re okay after this. Thank you for your contribute 🫡
@@Daggz Hopefully, you weren't too stressed out. Wish you the best.
what an absolute soldier. i wouldn't want my worse enemy to watch any of this shit.
@@Daggz you we're a good one comrade
I love watching hour-long videos on things I haven't heard of, thank you Quinnamon
Wendy icon based
Wendy fan!!!!
Same (South park pfp 😋)
as a csa victim, the playhouse is extremely and painfully relatable, even pretending having a different person in your place, or pretend nothing ever happened, though triggers completely collide your world again. I was also a victim of my father, and some of the deranged things shown in Alfred’s playhouse (sh to get attention and thinking that it was deserved) I find in myself. I do not condone Emily’s behavior, but I can sympathize for her. As of now, I am still trying to heal, and I hope I can learn from this and hopefully grow.
Especially the popsicle scene.
What is upsetting is that this series is a genuinely troubling psychological horror, with a lot of artistic choices genuinely being good at portraying panic attacks, overstimulation, trauma, Dissociation, SA, and even DID at times.
You know it's really crazy when there's a warning
Oh Absolutely, the warning is warranted... Said warning was given once this time too.
Hi Unknowningly :D
Gulp
whats going on pap fam!
Gulp 3
zoinks
Jinkies
@@Glub-46 Ruh-roh
I’ve scrolled through the comments, but haven’t seen anyone mention it, so: the warning about the movie’s depiction of necro**ilia, gore, and SA is at 44:54, but recommends to skip to 35:37, which is earlier in the video. To skip the entire movie segment, go to 50:46.
Thank you I was about to comment about this
THE GREATEST HERO OF ALL TIME 🗣️‼️‼️‼️
I feel like I could make a joke connecting Emily with H.P. Lovecraft, but my Yithian partner says that it is too soon. I'll come back in a century to say it.
I will hold you to this. Just don't ask how
Pretty accurate. Both of these people only got their deranged views due to mental illness, with Lovecraft denouncing them when he regained his sanity
@@Vesperad0ill stay for the journey lol
I'll be awaiting for this moment
We'll be waiting
It's so disheartening to see people like Emily; as someone who was in a similar situation as her, it's also a bit horrifying how I might have turned out like her if the dice rolled a bit differently and I didn't get the help I needed.
its always terrifying seeing internet cases that really resonate with you at the beginning before diving into the deep end. really gives a lot of perspective about how some small key things can completely change your trajectory in life.
It sucks that you had to go through a similar situation. I'm glad things worked out for you, at least.
I just hope people who are similarly traumatized and don't have access to the resources they need, know that they don't have to turn out like her. They can choose to be better people than her, in spite of all of the suffering they endured. The cycle of trauma doesn't have to be continued.
"No, not with a cookie monster magnet" CLASS OF 09 JUMP SCARE😭
FRRR
Learning about a infamous person the internet and their derogatory webtoon which involved some of the worst subject matter I've ever heard of while simultaneously witnessing the pyrocynical tf2 clip for the 34th time. THIS.. is the content I signed up for, thanks Quinnamon
The what clip?
@@AwesomeYena1:46
Another detail I’d like to add is that Emily was once in a relationship with Jimmy Screamerclauz, and made Alfred’s Surprise after their breakup, which is probably why she used his character Labby in that animation who is depicted abandoning Alfred. She uses the soundtrack from the Land before Time in that video too, which she says was the last movie she watched with Jimmy. Further proof that the Alfred animations are probably just a projection of herself.
Heres the podcast where she says all this: czcams.com/video/gBbzigrHt_E/video.htmlsi=EPDj4O5qjFjD1uAb
17:20 im so autistic i felt my phantom ears perk up when i processed the class of 09 reference
same bro. same.
VERY REAL
Me too man
ME TOO
REAL OMG
i almost cried midway through the video bc of 1. the whole "i hurt myself because this is the only way people show concern about me" thing, and the bit about pickles taking over everytime something traumatic happens so that alfred may live without it.
im not a trauma holder myself, but i am an alter in a system, and i am not the og host. so i get it, sort of.
and the whole s/h thing. i dont really self harm, havent for 2 years. but i understand the feeling that you have to have something major happen for people to show concern. because you're isolated, and you get so used to the people around you just knowing the carefully curated version of you who has no problems, and is much more mentally stable than you actually are. you start to believe that the people around you arent going to care unless you find a way to make them see how much you're suffering.
i dont ever plan on actually enacting any harm on myself. but i get the urge sometimes.
Hey. I'm just a stranger on the internet but I read all of your comment and genuinely wish you well. 🧡
i hope your doing well now
I hope you are well, fellow pilgrim of the Internet.
May the Force be with you. 💜
I absolutely can understand this feeling, even if our experiences are different. The urge is always going to linger, but I promise it gets better. Sometimes you're in a place where you don't realize that, but I promise as someone who was once there that things do change and you do grow bigger around that circle of grief, pain, and isolation. I wish you well, and thank you for sharing this even if you just wanted to get something out there. It's a vulnerable thing to admit
Much love to you and the rest of y'all in the meat mech
As someone with DID (formerly called Multiple Personality Disorder) this is unfortunately not much worse than the average media depiction of it which is usually just "oo scary serial killer alter"
Hey fellow system! I’m hopeful we can get some positive did rep soon, even the best did rep I’ve seen in the majoritypublic (moonknight) involves an alter who kills people fora living. Did systems literally just CHILL and VIBE I don’t understand why people are so convinced we beat ass for a living 😭😭😭 do they realize that the severe childhood trauma we experience will most likely prevent us from being abusive, and the cases like this are so rare that it shouldn’t even be considered for the entire did community. I could talk about this allday lmao 😭😭😭 nice to meet you!
@@mj-sw2nh Yeah, its wild. Ultimately I know it's just reflective of the typical ableist trope of oo mentally ill person is evil and crazy but still its like. We're the way we are because of trauma, why would we want to impart that kinda pain onto others out of nowhere?
@@mj-sw2nh EXACTLU WJY DO PEOPLE THINK WE KILL PEOPLE 😭😭 WHERE DID IT COME FROM???
@@Senkoki I don’t have DID, but I can say that sometimes people overlook how offensive something is because it doesn’t affect them, or they won’t see it from the other groups perspective. Have you seen how we treated Japanese people back in the early days of the internet, a lot of people were just treating them as extension of themselves into “Japanese culture”, by that I mean anime. Sorry that we represent you in that way, but we would never do it intentionally
@@smugmari Let’s be honest here, someone who has an alter that kills people, is the perfect set up to a horror movie😂(no offense)
The way i paused what i was drawing when you called out artists who use these types of videos for background ambience like ive never been so scared drawing objects on ibispaintx
That scared me too-
The warnings had me GAGGED. I DID NOT EXPECT TO SEE ALL OF THOSE WARNINGS FOR A DOG SHOW ON YT!??!?!??!!?
Yes, I’m able to understand the Alfred’s Playhouse trilogy for what it is while acknowledging that it’s also just terrible and disgusting and the actual worst thing ever. But it’s so real and just so raw in an unforgiving way that I’m disgusted with myself for how much I can relate to such an awful thing. It messed me up bad for like a week after seeing it and still messes with me to this day and I regret ever watching it and learning more, but I feel that I needed to in a way. It’s helped me understand myself a bit better but of course, that’s not enough to justify its existence or make it ok. But still.
You shouldn't feel bad for relating to the show or even the creator, just make sure you don't fall down the same dark path.
@@aesiro13I second this
I thrid this
@@aesiro13 Completely valid concern and I appreciate you saying it but just to clarify I do NOT relate in any way to the terrible things she’s done/said and only ever related to theme of trauma from childhood SA in I do NOT agree with any of her opinions or think they’re ok ❌
@@cannibalisticcereal2898 Never said you did, just glad to hear it.
This video has been so weird and disheartening to watch. I grew up on newgrounds and I remember watching Emily’s animations. I never dug deep into who she was and just let my too edgy and desensitized teenage boy brain laugh at what was on the screen. It’s so jarring seeing someone I used to watch have such horrible and bigoted beliefs, but I understand how it happens. Being in those spaces can easily lead to falling down the alt right pipeline, especially at that time. I made it out, but it’s a reminder that a lot of others didn’t.
Keep in touch with your friends guys, isolation and seeking validation leaves you *very* open to bad actors. Ask them how they’re doing, be a good actor in their life, your support and voice can be all the difference sometimes. ❤️
I love everything about this comment. Thanks for trying to put good shit out into the world, dude 👌🏽
That's good advice, man.
Watching hour long documentaries is one of my favorite passtimes
Same
I feel... God I feel horrible finding out about this. I nearly, NEARLY fell down the same rabbit hole she did and I'm so relieved I avoided it in the end. As a result though I can't help but wish she would have been able to avoid it too.
There's something about that sort of absurdly over-the-top offensive way of making art I enjoy, how someone can just let loose and be as vile and gross as they want to be to make a point. It almost guarantees the people who may need to see it will stick around and people who don't will leave quickly. Knowing just a little of what happened to her and of how that came out through her work... It tears me up.
This was fantastically done and I hope this gets far more views. If it helps, the algorithm actually recommended it to me so you're doing something right! Subscribed because of it
I agree with that second paragraph. It’s so fascinatingly raw and uninhibited, and I almost want to encourage this primal level of creation. Almost.
@@amusingmoose9924 There's a lot of other debased works like this out there, they're just understandably not talked about often. It's a valid method of expression and can be done in a healthy way, just not one that's liked by a lot of people haha
The audible "oh no..." I let out as CZcams recommended me this...
I used to love her work, because it really did portray just how isolation and being easily overstimulated can feel just... like a nightmare. I drew her some fanart back in the day, she even asked me hey I love this, do you do animation because I'm looking for volunteers for the Alfred Alfer movie, I told her that sadly not but I can contribute some drawings; she never got back to me. Sure wouldn't want to work with her nowadays...
"I needed to do some research, so I went on /pol" oh nooo...
I am currently aggressively drawing The Binding of Isaac characters (and a lot of mlp)
Thank you so very much.
Though that was scary being acknowledged.
which mlp characters i like starlight
I LOVE THE BINDING OF ISAAC THE BINDING OF ISAAAC FAN SPOTTED
@@smugmari I LOVE THE BINDING OF ISAAC TOO GRAHHHH (and omori is an masterpiece)
@@quinnamon yeah, its neat to know oyher interest you may have.
(this ain't an Bot response, I SWEAR!!)
@@smugmariOmori Profile Pic sighted.
43:17 she got banned on fucking 4chan... What the fuck how 😭
not even the site with the most nazis/racists/homophobes liked her 😭
How do you get kicked out of the internets trash can???
Honestly I just feel really bad for Emily as dark as her art is she really did have a talent If only she could have got the help she needed who knows what her art would be like by now.
Wasn't expecting you of all people to cover this person in particular.
“The Leviathans are coming for you” phrase should honestly be used more. Its so funny knowing the context XD
Call me a sensitive content viewer or extremely sympathetic/empathetic person, but I'm starting to realize my biggest trigger is cartoon dog characters being portrayed as necrophiles/serial killers/evil people.
Ever since seeing "Ren Seeks Help", this type of portrayal in cartoon dogs just makes my stomach churn.
Like obviously I don't mind seeing a cartoon dog be a villain like in a kid friendly cartoon way, but once they start doing visually unpleasant things, I draw a line.
@@torytellstales I'm not an easily triggered person, but I totally get where you're coming from. I watched Ren Seeks Help at a young age since I was (and still kinda am) a Ren & Stimpy fan, but that episode really rubbed me the wrong way back then, even now it really freaks me out
I completely get it,as a child those "haunted" animatronic toy dolls/teddy bears used to send me straight to tears and they still make me uneasy idk what it is about seeing such cute things made evil for the sake of it makes me uncomfortable
Ah yes, Emily: The classic cautionary tale on how edge can go too far
Honestly, the internet was probably the worst environment for her to be in general, let alone the Wild West era where slurs and bile were being thrown around like candy. The internet was always a dumpster fire, even long before social media made it worse.
emily and alfred fascinate me. emily might not *have* d.i.d.- but as someone who was diagnosed late in life that also projected through art long before that diagnosis was ever considered, it. is very reminiscent of that. alfred is very very clearly a vessel for something emily is dealing with, whether or not She is aware of the depths of it all.
The way Emily talked about making the Albert movie almost reminds me of how Grant Morrison talks about the making of a hypersigil but in reverse, refusing to let it out so that the power remains until the moment its released.
Interesting to learn about a creator going down a very bad rabbit hole of nonsense and how it can latch onto ones' mental illness, especially in echo chambers of other weirdos like /pol/, looking forward to seeing more content!
The craziest part of Emily’s life to me is how she managed to get kicked out of a friend group that included both the co-creator of Smiling Friends and fucking shadman???
0:48 holy shite , it’s that crazy dog girl who became a specific Austrian mustached man lover
Man with a weird, odd, ugly and even disgusting mustache.. 😰
As a German....he was NOT German ...He was an aussie ....gosh
@@hiimlaury1694 shit you’re right
7:23 that actually scared me while I was making character references for art fight😭😭
“i don’t owe you people anything, i don’t know who you are, let me be autistic in peace” *immediate subscribe*
17:21 CLASS OF '09 REFERENCE??? BASED ALERT???
This is the first video ever that made me genuinely go like "ok, that's enough Internet for today."
Yeah, this was kind of scary.
So, basically, therapy should be free to prevent this.
And yet, it's not.
Because we live in a Dystopian Society.
The Ticci Toby fit goes crazy
Great video! My computer crashed halfway through watching it and I thought it was a part of the video for a good minute 😭
This shit fire and I ain't even started yet
The disturbed are comforted by the disturbing, which disturbs the comfortable
Edit:bro wtf I do NOT remember writing this 😭😭😭
"raise your words not your voice. it is rain that grows flowers not thunder." ahh 💀💀
Please for the love of god DO NOT become a writer💀💀💀
@@Salemyousuckman Bruh shut up i was tryina sound smart
corny
@@aakzut not corny at all gang
There's a lot of gross people in this fandom. From nazis to those who make disgusting fanworks
Doesnt surprise me. Emily's one herself.
@@8-ballcoverofleftflanks633 yeah there's one writer that writes cp of the characters... It's gross
No such thing as writing cp, are you under 15 or something?@@ashfur7387
@@ashfur7387What!?
@@ashfur7387 I'm surprised no one is talking about the nazi part of it, I'm seriously horrified
I'm so glad I could finally find a version about this topic that I could actually watch without feeling really sick
you must be really weak mentally....
"What are you drawing? Let me see it."
Just a scene of the final battle of Kirby Canvas Curse. Also keep up the video essays.
With the way she writes, emily is clearly a smart person, and the clear air of intelligence present in each passage we get from her adds so much to her story
I relate to Alfred so much that he was somewhat comforting to me, and unfortunately I still somewhat do. Knowing about Emily has ruined it for me and made it impossible for me to find solace in Alfred, all I can feel is guilt for my draw to him and the series. I’m deeply ashamed of how I feel towards Alfred and wish Emily got help
I wish I could talk about the complex feelings more often but fear being misunderstood or causing trouble or attracting Emily towards me
There is nothing wrong with relating to the work a creator creates, no matter how twisted and heinous that creator is. We're all humans, and it's easy to see ourselves even in horrible people. But does that mean we are them? Not at all.
I understand what it's like to feel ashamed and embarrassed when you find yourself deeply relating to the creations that someone terrible produces. But that doesn't mean you yourself are a terrible person. Nor does it mean you are supporting their toxicity.
What's important, above all else, is knowing to not go down the path that the creator did. Seeking comfort in toxic, cult ideologies that slowly drag you in until you're completely enveloped. As long as you're aware of that: there will never be anything wrong with consuming and relating to media created by terrible people that you acknowledge are horrible.
HOW DID SOMEONE GET BANNED FROM 4CHAN?!?!!
holy shit that is an achievement like no other
I'm gonna be honest, Rise of Alfred was the only vid I was able to watch without being absolutely horrified afterwards
Weird shit aside its actually incredible how quick she picked up animation and how good she got at it for 15. Teens in the 2000s/2010s were built different when it came to animation
And flash game makers. I took a game design class fivish years ago in college, and it was so hard to for me to understand.
The "hi you who just puts my videos on the background while drawing" called me out so hard that I subbed
(I am drawing some graffiti to decorate my sketchbook, thanks for the acknowledgement it scared me
I feel like I could’ve ended up like Emily. I was really edgy since the age 12 because of past traumatic experiences and things got worse after 13 with lockdown and other traumas. I was falling off the deep end and I often found comfort in being over the top edgy. Looking back at myself I can tell that I wasn’t a good person, I wasn’t a bad one either but I did some stuff I’m not proud of, I was very manipulative. The thing that saved me was my phone and my IPad breaking at the same time, not even joking. For a whole year I had little to no access to the internet due to my family not doing too great financially, but in that time I think I discovered myself, a better version of me.
On one hand I’m really sorry for Emily and how her trauma turned in the worst version of herself, on the other I know that wasn’t the only possible outcome, I may be childish but I hope she gets some senses back, and I hope her kids grow up better.
I thought the skibidi toilet thing was a bit lmao
Quinn lock in I need more videos
The "the people who put my videos in the background of them drawing" was scary😭, I'm playing with clay while watching this!!
I genuinely gasped when you called me out for putting this on in the background to draw 😭
of course the fnaf/mascot horror fan has to explain newgrounds to their audience
the shipwrecked 64 SFX at the start threw me off... future vid topic ?!
It’s really a shame, I actually like a lot of the jokes for what they are in these animations. Like the movie having “Where the Dead Go To Die” and “Where the Dead Go To Drink” is honestly really funny
BANNED OFF 4CHAN? HOW DO YOU GET BANNED OFF 4CHAN
There’s a ton of comments, so I doubt this one will be noticed, but as somebody who has watched Alfred’s Playhouse I’d like to thank you for not completely demonizing it and its fans.
I have Partial DID, which is essentially regular DID but lacking consisting switching. We(me and other alters) switch hosts(main alters), very rarely and few others front often unless they preform an important task or have some incentive to do so. Our past host watched the series around two years ago, and it definitely resonates with us a lot. None of us know what trauma we’ve gone through, just the consequences of it. But obviously somebody had to take the fall for it, just like Pickles in Alfred’s Playhouse. We have an inner world that doesn’t follow real world logic and there’s a lot of violence and harmful actions though not anywhere near the severity or seriousness as portrayed in AP. We haven’t watched the series itself since the first time and don’t plan on it, but it’s honestly even easier to relate now. The same past host after switching off has grown very self isolating and borderline abusive. He was involved closely in an online cult that convinced him he was a godlike figure, which while sounding not so serious was incredibly harmful to us as an already traumatized system at 14. My last interaction with him was downright scary and I wish never to repeat it. It is very important to know this is not normal for people with dissociative disorders, and it was most likely just our unique circumstances resulting in this. But the image of a power hungry, hateful, and abusive alter who was effectively locked away in an inner world of sorts definitely is relatable to us. Though thankfully most of it is completely irrelevant to our own experiences. I doubt Emily meant to make an accurate representation of dissociative disorders, but this is definitely better than most purposeful representation.
I do feel like AP and Alfred as a character himself can be “enjoyed” without being necessarily nazis like a lot of people say. Most likely just view it as shock material while others like myself oddly see themselves in it. It’s horribly grotesque and disgusting media, but sometimes people need that to actually find solace with their own trauma. I do feel weird about having a fandom center around it whether it was meant to be enjoyable or not, but the fans aren’t inherently bad people. I’m not a fan of it myself, but many are just flawed and hurt people who benefit seeing a character this absurdly crazy and traumatized. Thank you.
I panicked when i heard “jesus christ (corn) star”, i’m a huge fan of Jesus Christ Superstar (even planning on watching it live in Australia) and my goodness that shooked me to my core 😭
7:21 the way I looked up from my drawing with complete horror in my face
As a older gen whos been around on the internet for a long time. It saddening how many young people- shit people in general. I will come across, making some of the most awful art (not as in style but as in substance.) An how some of the people are actually just screaming into the void from pain. Needing some form of help that will not come until way later or not at all.( An other are just hateful and spitting nothing but venom.)
I had hoped Emily would get help. Its so easy for people with bad intentions or bad ideals to root themsleves into the minds of someone who fragile. Her actions now are unforgivable she a full adult. An while I'll mourn the child making edgy cartoons online. I have no sympathy for the adult alt righter. Who dislike poc like myself.
In a way she got what she so desperatly was crying out for.
this is prob the longest video essay i’ve watched in a long time. major props, you’re so engaging! keep it up!
i’m so glad there’s more video essays on this topic, yours so far has had the most details and research which i admire so much
At one point I talked to her and commissioned art from her. This is how my pitbull fursona came to be. I do NOT and NEVER will share the same political views as her. My character was created by chance. I have no plan on getting rid of her. I am separating the art from the artist. And no, this art in my profile pic is not what Emily drew. But what she DID draw was just a cute picture of Blueberry and Alfred sitting by a fireplace. That's it. No politics or anything disgusting. I stopped talking to Emily and will not engage with her again.
how was she in conversation? id imagine at the time she was much more coherent
@@codeinexrist Yeah, I guess. To be honest I was afraid of mentioning any of this because people tend to like to take things out of proportion. They like to go over the top and assume things of people who had interacted with certain people in the past. As I said before, I do not share the same views as her. In fact, sometimes I want to go to her socials and tell her that she is wrong and she should really reconsider her views. But it is better to not poke the bear. (So to speak).
aw hell nah yo ass tweaking alfred!!!
Omg I’ve actually watched another CZcams video about this so it’s very interesting to see someone else talking about it, just started but know this is gonna be a dozy
It always sucks to see someone with potential and talent spiral down like this
You actually started at the beginning!!! Most people skip Shizzle and the old song video!
Alfred's playhouse is just an extremely edgy depressing and disturbing show but somehow it's what gives it it's charm
Love your videos, it’s a kind I can’t find anywhere else where it goes over an entire series and pops in on the creator themself to give both sides full context
i literally watch alfreds playhouse last night while baked and oh my god i was so scared and genuinely shaken
bruh i thought this was an analysis about a horror game😭😭😭
REAL
Emily did not deserve this....Alfred did not deserve this...and honestly despite how awful he might be and how painful his voice is to listen to...i kind of liked him...he is tragic...his creator is tragic...everything is tragic...
I first watched alfred back in high school and its kind of stuck with me since. my art ive come to realize has some traits in common with youcis and its something I would think about every once in a while.
I find it thematically ironic that emily ended up falling into the worst crowd and saying horrible things for, lets me real now, attention and affection. The far right offered her a place of praise and attention as long as she does and says bad shit, and she ate the figurative dog bone; ruining her life and reputation for the sake of feeling seen and loved (even if its not genuine affection).
your audience is NOT small by any means, you are killing it
Alfred Alfer is probably my most embarrassing hyperfixation
It’s times like this where we wish we could control our hyperfixations…
My curiosity is taking over.. I understand it is traumatising but should.. i watch it..? :/
@@ShyloTheFox I mean if you want you can no one can really police what you watch, for me it portrays distress and trauma pretty accurately, (for me) and that’s what makes it really nerve wracking
Oh no. (I watched it)
Out of all videos I've seen about this topic, this is by far the best one, a full on telling of all the events and the past of Emily herself well explained and a hell of a great edition, great job
This doesn't have anything to do with Emily or her work but I've watched two of your videos so far and I'm really glad that you're not secretive about being a victim of sexual trauma, especially CSA. I hate that I can't even talk about my experiences without being seen as venting or trauma dumping, even if I just mention my trauma where it's relevant and in a completely neutral manner. It makes people so uncomfortable that CSA victims (at least in my experience/with people I've talked to) are frequently told (directly or indirectly, intentionally or unintentionally) to not talk about their trauma, which just leads to more of us feeling isolated, unsupported, and alone.
So, it's good to hear someone else casually mentioning/talking about their own trauma, especially on a widely public video. More people need to talk about it, so more people realize how sickeningly common it actually is, and more can be done to stop it. I hate how it happens to you when you don't have a voice, and then by the time you're old enough to finally talk about it, people ask you why you aren't over it yet, it was so many years ago...
This reminds of kanye but imagine if kanye did all his 2022 stuff during life of pablo
exactly, mental breakdowns leave you so susceptible to falling into alt right stuff. some people also theorized that he went crazy after seeing a specific therapist 1 time. Who knows what happened. The same thing happened to a former soldier who was court assigned a therapist and he went crazy after 1 session.
*the therapist used to work on MKUltra
Hearing someone talk about Alfred’s playhouse makes me so sad because you can see glimpses of a good idea. I was assaulted as a child and while I’ve never actually watched Alfred’s playhouse, seeing you describe it sounds so familiar. Being forced to rely on media to dissociate and separate yourself from the reality of what happened or regressing into a childlike state to stifle a panic attack is exactly what I do all the time. It’s really on point and it’s a shame that the idea wasn’t used differently. It could have ended up being really therapeutic for some many people. More so than it already is.