This Is How Trauma Bond With The Narcissist Look Like

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  • čas přidán 21. 09. 2023

Komentáře • 46

  • @user-oo1hj6jy6w
    @user-oo1hj6jy6w Před 9 měsíci +17

    It's so hard to wrap your mind around the fact that people are capable of such torment and evilness. I've lived threw it, 3 years out now, literally have had my body broken, from my head to my toe, MRI:s, X-rays and CT scans to prove it, but no real test to show the damage to my person, my character, emotionally and phycology to my heart and soul, they suck all your good qualities out under the disguise of interest and care for you, only to leave you broken in every possible way. Physical, mentally, emotionally, financially and spiritually. These people roam the earth, traveling to and from, seeking to devour good. Intent from the very start...to destroy😢

    • @kayisess
      @kayisess Před 9 měsíci +2

      May you get the healing

    • @warangel4389
      @warangel4389 Před 8 měsíci

      Demons - absolutely true.

  • @Indrani_Mukherjee19
    @Indrani_Mukherjee19 Před 9 měsíci +2

    I thought my actions were wrong but I was behaving from trauma, now I'm healing,your videos are working best in my journey.

  • @user-ds5uj6mj9n
    @user-ds5uj6mj9n Před 9 měsíci +14

    do narcissists know they have trauma bonded you.
    or dont they know?

    • @arhafrench5319
      @arhafrench5319 Před 9 měsíci +9

      The other word for _trauma bond_ is "love addiction, " and that's the best way I've studied that explains it. There is absolutely nothing healthy about an addiction, and while love is perfectly wonderful, in a situation with a narcissist, THEIR version of love is not uplifting and bettering for their partners. To them, love is about power and control, the ability to manipulate and extort all the love you give them while giving you abuse, insecurity, trauma and mistreatment in return, mixed in with little moments of time where they are kind and nice to you to confuse you into staying, thinking that things will get better. When someone is addicted to something, they will continually seek to partake in it, even when it's not good anymore, even when it's expensive, even when it is taking control of them and getting them into trouble, even when they need truly important things like food, healthy connections, gainful employment, good health, etc. Narcissistic/toxic people want EXACTLY that from their partners. It boosts their ego and their self-esteem to have someone in a position where they literally choose abuse from them instead of love for themselves. They won't tell you straight out that they have twisted intentions to make you crazy about them like that, but all their actions picture directly to that. Every time there is peace, they get bored and stir up contention and chaos to "make things interesting" and "keep you on your toes so that you don't get too comfortable." When you blow up or start crying and trying to reassure them that you still love them, they just poked at you to see if you are still willing to keep yourself in that "love addiction hell" with them to prove it. When you don't react to them, it makes them nervous, anxious and irritable because they feel like they don't have the proper attention for them that they need to feel empowered and in control of you. They absolutely know what they are trying to establish with a trauma bond.

    • @user-ds5uj6mj9n
      @user-ds5uj6mj9n Před 9 měsíci

      @@arhafrench5319 so when everything was going good with my malignant husband buy good i mean calm for a day or two, one day i was watching tv he come in my back was turned i was lieing on floor he peed on me than went straight to bathroom it happened so fast i went crazy he had this silly childish look on his face. why!!!

    • @Smiley_Boi76
      @Smiley_Boi76 Před 9 měsíci +6

      Most narcissists don’t care why you’re hooked as long as they know how to keep you hooked.

    • @dianaunderwood9807
      @dianaunderwood9807 Před 9 měsíci +6

      Oh yes they know it's intentional!!!!😢

  • @connie9492
    @connie9492 Před 9 měsíci +3

    SADLY SO!

  • @reshmabhatnagar4024
    @reshmabhatnagar4024 Před 9 měsíci +4

    Correct

  • @kaboom4986
    @kaboom4986 Před 9 měsíci +3

    Boxing classes are so empowering. Soon lm also starting martial arts. I will not be punched again without punching back.

    • @dianaunderwood9807
      @dianaunderwood9807 Před 9 měsíci +3

      Good for you, you have to take your time and know when a person is toxic now that you have all the signs. Be careful and you never have to fight the right person. God is with you, know that to be true. God put his warriors through the hardest test. I feel that we are chosen for this mission in our lives for a reason, don't fail your test. I believe God has something in store really good for us Be patient and get out anything that is hurting you, physically mentally emotionally spiritually and financial. From her on out like they say protect your meat -your money, e-Your energy, a-attention, T- time. God have blessed you with all this so don't give it to nobody absolutely nobody it's yours not theirs in Jesus mighty name Amen 🙏😇💗🫂

  • @toritori5835
    @toritori5835 Před 9 měsíci +4

    Could you post that link to the course again, please? Thank you, Danish. 😊

  • @AveMaria_GratiaPlena
    @AveMaria_GratiaPlena Před 9 měsíci +2

    This is what i'm into😢A trauma bond that is very difficult to break. Oh God, i just wish I could break this and be free.

    • @dianaunderwood9807
      @dianaunderwood9807 Před 9 měsíci +1

      You can and you will, hold real talk to your faith and be strong 💪, This is only a test darling pass it. Show yourself what you really made of Amen pray and ask the Lord to lead you, 👣👣 have confidence in yourself. It would take that in a whole lot more to make it through the other side 💃💃💃, I'm definitely on my way. You're not going through this by chance everything is for a reason not that we chose wrong we were fooled. God is testing your sincerity and faith before taking you to the next level. This you will have to do for yourself with the help of God himself sending my love 😘🫂

  • @shanusingh2433
    @shanusingh2433 Před 9 měsíci +1

    Nice timing of this on screen. Just had the same chapter.

  • @kikikoko607
    @kikikoko607 Před 8 měsíci

    Told my husband yesterday, that I just recently realized, what I've actually been through, with him all these years. Also, because of videos, like yours, Danish! And he still can't understand, that even though it's six years ago, I can not forgive. He always says: ,,Why can't you just forgive me? Why are you angry now??" It's because, I had the time to reflect and care for myself and to remember. I always surpressed my experiences and moved on to care for my children.

  • @keddy5627
    @keddy5627 Před 9 měsíci +4

    😳😳😳 soooooooo true! Gulp! 😢

  • @saje007
    @saje007 Před 9 měsíci

    Said better than an expert psychologist, knowledge but with compassion. Danish you have a gift! Thank you for speaking on this!

  • @JJ-pf3ok
    @JJ-pf3ok Před 9 měsíci

    It is horrifying. I never pretended to be ok. I let him know I was furious

  • @khoakdoan
    @khoakdoan Před 3 měsíci

    Dang, she checked all of the boxes in this one. It was the worst 6 months of my life, I thought the cycle would never end. I couldn't leave either because she'd make suicidal threats and other things.

  • @mishaanton5436
    @mishaanton5436 Před 9 měsíci

    The few I knew wanted the narccs validation. They meke you think they live you. Then when abusing comes you want to have your feelings validared. You want the love and respect you gave to be retturned.

  • @streamlineperformance6028
    @streamlineperformance6028 Před 9 měsíci +10

    I'm a male, working in VIP protection actually and both my ex wife physically hit me and now my current GF whom I can't pull away from for the literally life of me, has broken my eye socket by smacking it broken with the lower palm of her hand, broke the voltaren injection I got for the insane amount of pain and the other night she whipped me across my face with her bra calling it an accident before hitting me right in the chest. The following day I told her, I used to think you accidentally hit me with your elbow or knee because you're naturally clumsy. It's stopped now and she used to do it 4-5 times a day. Was she physically abusing me everyday without me even realising it? How is this even possible????

    • @arhafrench5319
      @arhafrench5319 Před 9 měsíci +5

      The game is to get you bonded to the "good times" you are staying with them for, then to slowly turn up the pressure on you. They will do stuff and stay stuff to you that you KNOW doesn't feel, sound, or look right, and then laugh it off, call it an accident, call you sensitive or crazy, and somehow have YOU apologizing for being hurt or offended to keep them from being angry or upset. Gradually you will begin to notice that there are no attempts to camouflage the malicious intent, and you will notice the lack of effort they extend in trying to make sure that everything is all right for you, because by now you've stayed with them way longer than your intuition told you you should have. They'll do something all-out wrong right in your face, and give you an attitude of "Yeah, so what? What are you going to do about it?" This is them testing out how far they've led you out on the proverbial tree limb, and how much they can be sure they have "got you tied up." It is definitely possible to see them being malicious in nature, and then turning around to tell you "I was just playing, why you gotta be so serious, can't you take a joke? Now you're ruining everything by crying, you're being weird." I hope you find a way to get away from that entanglement. If you find yourself guessing all the time about what your partner's motives and intentions are, and you find yourself frowning and making excuses for their hurtful behaviors, choosing to believe the best in spite of what they're showing you, and afraid to leave because you think you might lose something important with them if you decide not to stay around, you are on a very likely toxic situationship. If you are putting your best effort into showing them love and patience and they are acting as if it's _your job_ to do that and they are under no such similar requirements...Yeah. She's playing hot and cold with you. Get out.

    • @pompabomba1
      @pompabomba1 Před 9 měsíci

      damn

    • @MattyNelson-rs3ik
      @MattyNelson-rs3ik Před 9 měsíci

      For the literal life of you?you cannot pull away from her? Her couchy can,t surpass murdering you.a man being whipped by a woman?

    • @deela262
      @deela262 Před 9 měsíci +2

      It is abuse. Not just physically.
      Your body and mind is not for others to get a kick by intentionally hurting. Identify your boundaries my dear. You dont have to allow others to hurt you. You didnt come to this world for this shit. Far better to be alone. Move back and slide out. Come out of the box and look straight at their action.
      Bdw the excruciating back pain IS due to this drama. That itself is enough to step out. You've enabled enough.

    • @kayisess
      @kayisess Před 9 měsíci +1

      What... just run away from her. Danish Bashir is helping us a lot and I strongly agree with Ms. Arhafrench's reply.

  • @lorsange1107
    @lorsange1107 Před 9 měsíci +1

    More information about the course, please.

  • @mars1379
    @mars1379 Před 9 měsíci

    Two sentences pass and I find my thumb going to the like button. Have you been living with me??!!! Who are you? How do you know???

  • @nazimabegum9326
    @nazimabegum9326 Před 9 měsíci +3

    Pls find a way to get out of it

  • @Creativecatalyst..
    @Creativecatalyst.. Před 8 měsíci

    Be the person who breaks the cycle.If you were judged,choose understanding.If you were rejected,choose acceptance.If you were shamed, choose compassion. Be the person you needed when you were hurting,not the person who hurts you.. Please Don't suffer and die in silence as you can spy on his/her location, calls and socials to find out with proof that he's cheating.

  • @khoakdoan
    @khoakdoan Před 3 měsíci

    I knew I never loved her. I only said it because she would explode if i didnt.

  • @TheAdventuresOfCollegeGiRL
    @TheAdventuresOfCollegeGiRL Před 9 měsíci

    But how do I know for sure? What if I’m wrong and he’s not a narcissist ?

    • @dianaunderwood9807
      @dianaunderwood9807 Před 9 měsíci +1

      If you see all the other red flags that you have been taught then you know Don't doubt yourself. That's intentional as well!!! Follow your holy Spirit is there for a reason, May God bless you and your journey but he's telling you you need to get away from that, save yourself❤

    • @Joulean
      @Joulean Před 4 měsíci +1

      If you are questioning it, he is.

  • @christelleny
    @christelleny Před 9 měsíci +1

    Not unlike the Stockolm Syndrome...

    • @8all8at8once8
      @8all8at8once8 Před 9 měsíci

      That’s what I told people, how I feel. No one took me serious. When I told an episode which happened at night times, the response of a woman was: „oh, he must have felt really desperate to act this way.“
      I’m so over excusing shit behavior of others.

    • @Joulean
      @Joulean Před 4 měsíci

      ​@@8all8at8once8 most people are dumb. Traumabonding is literally Stockholm syndrome