What Goes on in a Narcissist's Mind When They Miss You
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- čas přidán 28. 06. 2024
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chapters
00:00 introduction
00:38 what do you do when you miss some one ?
01:35 A thought in Narcissists head !
03:14 They expect you to give up on your pain
05:13 They may directly try to contact you !
05:55 How do I know this ?
06:49 The Narcissists brain is a brain of a Predator
07:46 NEVER BELIEVE THEIR WORDS
narcissist: "i miss you".
me: i don't blame you. i did more for you than you deserved, and more than i should have done. i gave you 120% and you gave me zero in return. i was so good to you despite all the bullshit you put me thru....
AND ALSO, i miss me too. i miss the "me" i used to be, before ever meeting you.
so yah, if i were you, i would miss the f*ck out of me too.
at least the power, control and benefits that you used to enjoy lol.
cheers from southern ontario, canada 🍁
That was great!!!!😂😂 and so true!💙💪🔥
Spot on! 100% Exactly what I've always wanted to say to "them" but choose not to! Especially the part about "I MISS ME TOO"!
@@Sadbuttrue-ThatSwedishGirl thanks. glad you found some benefit and enjoyment. 😉
-all the best, steven
@@bean606 it's nice if you can, but overall, let karma do the dirty work. rotten fruits eventually fall off by themselves.
-cheers, steven
Zero is not the truth because they give you so much to stay on their tables. (Breadcrumbs...). But the fact is: You CAN (are able to) do much more than them. I would advise everyone here - don´t put in them put in you!
They miss the Role you play in their game life 😢😢😢😢😢
Exactly they play games with you
Amen 🎉🎉🎉🎉
And they want the show to go on no matter what.
Yes , they call it " The narcissists playbook " !!
Narcissistic abuse is wrong and the victims deserve justice and peace.
Narcissistic abuse should be considered a crime.
Perhaps peace is the main thing i want till the end of my life but having this simple thing seems just impossible
@@yuu_miran It’s possible if you go no contact. I’ve been no contact for twenty years and for twenty years I have had peace. However I do have a lot of bad memories.
Vengeance is the Lords Amen
@@JesuisLord Yes and I’m glad.
Thanks for confirming what I already knew. Never go back because they'll double down on your punishment.
Each time I took this person back, the devalue cycle came faster than the previous one.
It’s really like they’re running a program.
The narcissists only miss the supply, for love forget about its.
He says hes still mourning! Over what!!!??? Treating me horrible
Exactly! They have selective memory
They gotta be ‘the victim’ even if they kill a puppy they’d play the victim ‘. I ruined my new clothes’ poor poor me ‘ sick sick twisted demonic self centered black holes.
Mourning ? Isn´t that in context of burials ?
Narcs can´t even get words right, they just test their effects like toddlers try buttons on a toy.
Exactly! They miss using you and manipulating you! My own mother would say "I miss you" and I never understood why it sounded wrong when she said it but your video explained it very clearly.
Mine has contracted me telling me he is sorry and misses me every day. Said I was the best person he has ever known and wants to start over. I now no longer feel the same abt him, so he is very depressed, sleeping all day he says.
Sorry, but I am enjoying being alone.
My ex narc had been trying to contact me every year around March/April since 2022. In 2022 he contacts me through LinkedIn. I vaguely remember the conversation, in 2023 he contacted me through Facebook and then showed up at my residence saying he would give me a ride to work (drunk as usual), I told him no because I knew he'd been drinking, March 2024, he sends me a photo of himself graduating from college (62 years old lol) and that's when I drew the line. Only contacts me every year around March and April for whatever reason? I told him if he contacts me one more time, a restraining order will be issued. Alcoholic sob and verbally abusive
My person after breakup does not feel like contacting or talking to me as we work toghter...I think I miss him but he has no feelings..
😢
"I miss you and love you." Are empty words.
This is a sick game
I didn’t know they had feelings! Who would’ve known🤷🏿♂️
They miss seeing the pain they cause.
you're so right. It's all a manipulative game. After i went no contact and the narcissist realized I was really done, he sent me a long text about how he went into a deep dark depression and was now coming out of it and feeling better. Of course an empath like me would typically fall for that and offer support. No more. I didn't respond. Depression doesn't make you mean and horrible to people for years like he was to me. Im done with this sick individual.
"weaponize empathy" , "sympathy vampires" - you are so spot on Danish, I am impressed every time.
They miss how you in their life made them have a good reputation in society.
That’s exactly what happened in my relation. He was getting respect because of me,because I had reputation, without me he is trash . Now after 9 months he wants me back 🤮🤮🤮
Another ploy of theirs is that after years of no communication nor contact, they will email you "heartfelt" birthday greetings, remarking what an irreplaceable, amazing person you are! It's enough to turn ur stomach! Delete!
Non sequiter: June 5 (tomorrow) is Danish's birthday!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DANISH! 🎉 Enjoy this special day and thank u for all you have gifted this community!! You have improved our lives beyond all expectations because of your rare and raw truth and authenticity! 100% genuine❤.
Thank you so much for remembering my birthday. It means a lot 🙂
Happy Birthday! Surviving our narcissists is another Birth’ing experience! Thanks Danish.
@@narcabusecoach 🎂
@@narcabusecoach - Many more happy returns of the day, This is SundarRaj from Southern part of India, your videos really enlighten me a lot, how i have suffered becoz of my narcissitic dad and grandma, Its so terrible experience with them,, my grandma died 10 years ago, i was younger at that time, but now my mind is recollecting all my trauma memories and healing.. Thanks a ton to you.. your videos must have helped a lot of souls.. Thanks a ton for ur teaching and all videos
@@narcabusecoach Happy Birthday Danish , 🎂🎂🎂 from one who finds your words validating , Thank-you 😊
Months ago, my narc discarded me, no contact, blocked me and all. And just today, message me giving his new mobile number just in case "I miss him" he said, then I can contact him and reconnect to him
🥴
So, this content is very timely and on point!!!
I asked my ex fince a week.or so after discard if he missed me (i was still very much trauma bonded and felt i needed his validation that what we shared was real).
His answer: "yes, I miss some things about you". Even while we were together it was clear he only appreciated, wanted, craved what I could GIVE him, not who I really AM. Im convinced, this is all the narc REALLY misses.
My ex literally sat me down and told me she misses me and still loves me while in a relationship with someone else 🤦🏼♂️
I went No Contact a few months ago from a friend that has always been manipulative and controlling. She did the smear campaign and now she keeps trying to reach out to me in several ways, like nothing happened. It’s like they’re stalkers, obsessed with trying to get you back. They just can’t accept that you want them out of your life for good. Creepy.
Could narcs go so far as contacting you covertly on the internet ? Something like that happened me last week, I was chatting personally with some anonymous user on a forum. Then a second user turned up, as if trying to get to know me. After a few rounds of asking, she gave herself away, that we´ve met IRL. That´s all she said but I knew straight away who that meant and blocked. I told user 1 about this because I was confused at first not noticing the different username but all of a sudden user 1 became hostile alike and stopped talking. Not that this whole thing bothered me , I got things to do but could it all have been her doing ? pretending to be multiple people ?
I went on no contact and she started using my own child to say it's your child who wants to talk to you not me.... Without an apology.
@@LukaChunda these are some mental people. Always crossing the boundaries.
Narcs don't miss you. They miss what you used to do for them. If they could find someone to do the things that they made you do for free, they would never think twice about you.
Hundred percent true . After 9 months he wants me back. Because it didn’t work with the new supplier. If it did work he wouldn’t even care. Obviously he couldn’t control her or use her God knows. I am better without him still heeling 🤕🤒
I couldn't figure out what was going on in his mind during all the time I was with him !!! They're stuck in their own head and sadly, that's about as far as it goes.
Thank you, Danish
Yes, just yesterday that person called, I answered bcse I believed if he called after 8 months, he suddenly became rude , mind games, this is when we were making plans together then he escaped and also manufacturing crises, I thought I'd hear an apology and a correction from him since he called, but he just called to find out what I do and where I stay and to see if he can come into my life again, I'm glad I'm not interested.
After 12 years of no contact, my narc former sister sent me an e-mail complimenting me saying "everybody I know always thought you
looked like Catherine Zeta Jones". I immediately deleted the e-mail and did not respond, nothing good could come of contact. If I
respond with anger or with an insult (which I really WANT TO DO) she would love it. That's the supply she needs. I have no family
because of her. You are spot on.
Wow she's beautiful though
I am in the same boat... a nasty heartless sister who feels entitled to destroy my reputation and my own family. It is nauseating to be sure!
Absolutely! ANY response at all = SUPPLY. If you are nice, then they can reel you in to discard you later. If you are not nice, then they can have a pity party and play the victim. I have a narc younger sister with whom I'm also No Contact. I would love to have an actual relationship with a real sister, but it's not her. My parents are/were narcs (my mother has passed), and I suppose she learned from them. The three of them Scapegoated me my entire life, and that would promptly restart if I reinitiated contact. I also have no family, including most, if not all, of my extended family. I really do understand you. It sucks sometimes, but I have to believe we are happier and healthier. We got out! Take care, my friend. 🙏💜
Danish, aa I write this my daughter is trying yet again to pop right back in my life. She and my three beautiful granddaughters,8mths to 8yrs, showed up at my apartment yesterday after I had not text nor called her in a few months. Steering clear after she just took them away from me March before last. She got a car and no longer needed me. With her, stress left, confusion left. And I gained peace of mind, more money in my bank account and a new love in my life that was never expected nor looked for. God is so good and at 58, took 35 years of narcissist abuse I never knew I was experiencing. I knew I was above the limit on abuse, physical, mental, psychological and emotional but you put a name and all the other elements in place. I'm not stupid, I knew the word but I equated that with prideful and egotistical people. My daughter far exceeds her dad, my ex-husband. Bless you and thank you. You are a blessing and whether you know it or not.. you are a gift from God and He is pleased... Peace and Blessings to you, your family and All your subscribers 🙏🙏🙏💖😊🌞
I know! I went though all that shit!
I've cut off with him at least 5 times & he exactly did this kind of weird activities to come back! But this time I'd try my best leaving him forever. I know it’s difficult for a victim to run away from a narc partner but no other way to survive!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANISH YOU ARE A GIFT TO SO MANY SO GLAD GOD MADE WONDERFUL YOU ! THANK YOU SO MUCH ! 🤍🎂🌸🤍
Thank you so much 😀
Thanks ❤you’re helping me getting through my pain 😢
We will get thru it together, the person that I was dealing with has really disappointed me once I realized what was really going on.
Thank you so much for your help. it help me to understand narcissist ❤.
Thanks so much for sharing your knowledge and experience 🙏🏻
They miss abusing you and controlling you. My miss and their Miss is 2 different ways
Danish, you literally explained all the nasty narcs in my life.
🎉 Truly never gave that much thought, hope that's my sign I've healed, busy convincing myself not to be obsessed with them, I know it's to stay no contact keeping me free for better vibes!😊❤😅
They miss you for what they could use you for and will lie, pretend to change, make all kind of promises to try to get you back
Wow , That hit home …..
When i miss someone i get sad, but once i reach them i feel fine again, narcisist dont miss you, once i went 5 years with out seeing my oldest narcisist brother and when i got to see him he told that It was about 5 years the last time we saw each other, i didnt had a clue how much time had past.
My X questioned one time if I was breaking up with her. All I said was thank you for being with me all these years and making memorable moments, I appreciate you. In the end, she broke up with me in a text. I responded, "One day you will realize that you have down- graded and there is no coming back. Good luck." LOL
They miss you as their tool.
💯
Danish in Pakistan every second person is NPD patient please give us the plan to survive married life with narcissistic husband. Coz we can't leave them.
My husband discarded me thank God
But our society is too conservative we can't be discarded. We need to survive with narcissistic husband. Please Danish help us
watch dr. Ramani too. She talks about such situations where it's difficult to leave them
I’m so sorry you had to go through that but also grateful for your videos. They’ve added pieces to my horrid puzzle making me realize I’ve been surrounded by such individuals my whole life. From father, ‘friend’🙄through my teenage years, and now I’m married to one-23 yrs together and it just keeps getting worse 😳
I Daily waits for your video thank❤you
I love the sweetness about you Danish. You explained that one so well. My ex narc boyfriend called me and said isn’t that amazing? I didn’t realize I called you. I said I don’t think it’s amazing at all and I will never ever go out with you again. He started to cry so I said , you There? And I hung up. He called back but I did not answer.
Don’t forget “but calls.” I would get them constantly from my covert mother and her new husband. Even before I went no contact. But calls are when them pretend that the phone called you on accident, so when you answer, all you hear is people talking or interacting in the background. Usually it at a gathering of people you know. No matter how many times you loudly say hello, no one will respond. Sometimes I get several in one week. They continued even after two years of no contact. Thank you.
So...narcs don't just manipulate for the good you give, but to also torture you? Yikes......D:
You're so right ✅️
I broke up with my ex 2 weeks ago because I realized he is a narc. I wonder why it took me almost 5 years to realize since my mother is the same way. Now there is a deep emptiness inside me, I have a heartache and daily crying attacks out of nowhere and find it hard to stop.
My thoughts are circling, I miss him, it hurts but I won’t contact him.
I just don’t know how to get through it.
I think I need help. 💔
Let's talk .me in same condition
If you had a narcissistic parent or both, you will then last longer in relationships with narcs. 1. Because you are groomed for it to be normal. 2. Because you have no support assuming your parents were toxic. So you stay longer.
You will get through this girl !
Trust me I didn’t know for 5 years now with help of a therapist am over it so happy peaceful
I’m really thankful for your videos! I don’t know for sure that a dear friend is a narcissist. Mainly because he is a long time alcoholic who is drinking a lot now. He certainly shows symptoms of many things. He, from past drug use that he stopped and drinking, has had either auditory hallucinations, delusions and thinks I and others played mean, cruel tricks or jokes on him. I know he can just take a word and twist it so he can make me so angry and evil. I’m hoping he will get help by detoxing. I thought he was, but, today over the phone (again) he gives it the F*** everybody. And people who try to still try to play games to hurt me like…. And of course he is talking about me. I’m grounded in who I am and know I have never treated anyone like he describes. I’ve learned not to get emotional or so angry like I have been in the past. Sorry so long. I don’t think I will ever know how he is unless he gets medical help to stop drinking. Thank you ❤
That's why my family won't send me an email (they are blocked and can't call me) not even in Christmas or New Year.
They also sent me an sms telling me my mother had a stroke but I didn't showed up. Still, a few days later I ended up in the emergency room due to intestinal spasms... that's how the induced guilt and their abuse showed in my body.
Then you know you need to leave if you care the bare minimum about yourself because they won't ever care. It's so sad when it's your family the origen of all of your misery in life and you look back seeing how you spoiled your life and soul feeding their black holes. Still, I don't agree I'm a "chosen one". I could have been better to the world if I weren't preyed upon over and over again.
They usually are so prideful they wreck the friendship and never give you any reasons and want you to miss and be harmed, they more than likely smile and feel great how they were able to drop you like an empty coke can never thinking about you ever again. Except that they can hear that you are disappointed and want you to try and apologize that they can manipulate you more. The best is to be 100% free, fix your trauma bond and see the patterns and get other great friends and look at yourself with love and know they are damaged lost demon possessed souls that only harm, the next source they have will be harmed, yet you are free and ignore the thoughts of that person and burn all connections to not ever see this person again
They are emotional sucking your essence vampires. They prey upon your kindness and play you, they poke and test and do their evil ways for fun and entertainement to not think about all their evil they have done and focus on their guilt and shame and wrongs, they busy themselves to go to the next source and take glee in the wrong gthey did to others in the past they abruptly drop. They smile and have glee for the wrong and ILL SHOW YOU attitude, they set you up to knock you down, they are jealous and resentful and dangerous, Run adn don’t look back at them, be free they are evil
Thank you well said 👍💯
I can bet - they don´t miss you - they only miss what you provide them. Because they don´t even know you in person (they never cared)... And they will replace you very fast (even in the relationship they had other supplies on the side to use - not to care - to use).
Absolutely true. Same happened to me. Days after discard she reached out to her ex boyfriend and saw them at a local concert. Meanwhile telling me she would stay alone after the break up. The look on her face when I exposed her that night was priceless. The thing that's hurts the most, I was doing the right steps to heal, and excepting the break up. I thought she was too....WRONG !! Stupid me for believing a w**re. Damn, I'm dumb !!!!
@@clintonnagy1662 Those people are totally different than you. You can´t trust nor believe them (sadly). And they walk on fast because they never created a deep bound with you (in fact it was never you in person they liked - it was what they can get out of you what they liked and loved...). You just have to accept that and move on (it is hard but with time it gets easier). The sadest thing is: In fact it is no loss to lose such people...
So true try the sick hospital game calling my daughter
Neverrrrr again
Have a neighbor narcissist trying to wiggle her way back in to my life right now. I am unable to move right now but I have her blocked from calling me. She walks around the corner and tries to talk to me. I calmly answer basic questions but no real information. I know she wants me to open up and let her back in or get angry and yell. She would be happy either way. When she talks all I hear are nails on a chalkboard.
I'm low and lonely without her 💔 I cried a thousand tears when she said goodbye 👋 💔 I'm balling my eyeballs out, and one of my eyes 👀 fell out from all the crying I have done since she said goodbye 👋 💔 😢
Thank you for your videos! All these things are literally happening just like in your shares! This healing is a blessing! ❤
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANISH🎉🎉🎉 certainly a blessing and a treasure you are, where would we be without you? Talk about confirmation! What am I doing that I keep drawing these ppl to me? ENOUGH!! I’m doin the work, all is well this too shall pass! Blessings on your special day Danish🙏🏾🙏🏾🎊🎉💕
Yes! When I told him to leave me alone since he's nothing but trouble, he goes on to say "all of those personalities you have were trouble". Lol! Really? If that's the case, why do you keep on contacting me every year, only once a year? That goes to show you he's up to no good. 62 years old trying to hoover me. I'm 55 years old and I ain't falling for it
This is absolutely 110% true absolutely experienced it too with a BF thank you
Show up to the hospital yeah right!😂😂😂😂
I have a narcissistic step mother we are fighting every now and then we've been on off for years but 2022 she did it again after a fight she weaponized my step siblings against me they all blocked me!
One of the sibling then unblocked me and i told her i know what's going on..she apologized but my heart was brocken 💔 i forgave her but then i blocked her !
The other siblings they suddenly keeping popping up on my WhatsApp with new phone numbers but this time around i knew it's my narcissistic step mother behind want to contact with me through my siblings, so this time i didn't fall for it i blocked them again and changed my phone number!
Danish you are always 100% accurate in every way! I couldn't help but laugh when you said they manufacture a crisis. All of a sudden they will have had an accident, broken bones, illness, etcetera. I have even been lied to about actual deaths in the family that didn't even occur!!!! It would be comical if it wasn't so pathetic. Thank You for being such a Blessing!!!
Hi Danish-I am new to your videos. I just want to thank you for taking the subject to a more critical thinking level. I’ve gained a lot of insight having listened /watched your videos. And additionally, I’m really sorry that you had to go through so much turmoil with both your Mother and Father. I share a similar story as yourself so I could relate 100%. Sending you healing energy and blessings for a brighter future.💖
The fact that you opened about your mom in this video makes this page 10x more genuine. All your content is just amazing , soo helpful ,Thank you sooo much for sharing and spreading this info.
Thank you. I needed to hear this
Thank you for sharing this ❤
They feel and think NOTHING!!!! Just move onto the next supply. And they don't care
Your timing to create an episode about this topic can't be more appreciated! For the past few days, I've been facing a similar experience with a certain narcissistic relative and so I have been going in circles because of it, but now I finally have some answers, so thanks for explaining the mentality behind creating such chaos in people's lives. I mean, narcs are a really fascinating breed,don't you think? 😅
I don't miss the narc-mother
The narc mother is another issue. Not only was i dealing with her, her narc son, narc ex boyfriend, now her narc mother. I was in hell from all sides. It eventually ended but it haunts me, and still hurts.
I believe that BOTH the narcissist and the survivor of the narcissist miss each other for the wrong reasons! I agree that the narcissist ONLY misses whatever supply that they were receiving, BUT when a survivor of the narcissist says that they are missing the narcissist, what are "THEY" missing? Are they missing the abuse? Are they missing being treated badly? Are they missing the narcissist crazy behavior and ways? Are they missing the gaslighting? Are they missing being with an evil sadistic person? You say that the narcissist doesn't miss the REAL YOU, and I agree...BUT there is no way that a survivor of the narcissist can miss the REAL THEM either since they only fell in love with the narcissist FASLE SELF!
Backfire to narcissist, I love God thank God Amen 💖
Your expertise, delivery credentials precede you .excellent
It’s uncomfortable how accurate this is to her actions
Makes perfect sense. Thank you.
Bang on ! Cheers
Thank you Danish. I really appreciate the knowledge you share in your videos.. this one was particularly informative.
✌🏽❤️ 🇦🇺
Hello danish ...
I m female...my husband have npd
I left my home ...he beat me so hard...by belt
Your video's help me a lot to understand the narcissist
And stay away from him
Can please make video in Hindi language plz .....it will help other women/men .... those who does not understand English..... mostly the female plz
That was a life saving msg sir.......thank you so much
This is such a good video. It is correct on every level.
Tremendously accurate 💯
I do recognize that part of making strategic plans, instead of the obvious just to call and say they missed you or ask for your help. Instead everyone must be outsmarted and outplayed all the time so the simpliest task cannot be executed directly, it has to be thought over for days and then presented in such a way it is known that your cousins, her neighbours, friends and distant relatives are in line for helping her out. You may have said for years you want to help her with the heater and also have done for years, but every time you do it she brings up that all of these persons all want to help her with the heater. Every conversation is like that. When I am helping out, all I hear is this and this person also offered their help. What is going on?
Happy Birthday for tomorrow! You’re a great person!
After 9 months he indirectly contacted me to be with him again . He is really sick. Life is better without him no going back .
Yes, mine sent me an email "where is ?" I didn't answer. Yes I have the narcissistic mother, thank God I have a sister and we can go back and forth about it. Nobody else would believe it, you have to live it and I have for 70 years, still living it.
LMAO HEY miss what they used to get from you not your heart and your spirit!
Thank you Angel Danish❤❤
A Hoover from a narcissistic ex is dangerous, they miss all da you regret doing and giving, never again, I’m better than my previous vulnerable and confused self
They only miss the control they had over you. They think they own you for life. If they truly cared they’d have never miss treated you to begin with. I know from experience it only gets worse if you take them back. They will want to punish you for keeping them at bay. Just block and delete them and their attempts if you don’t have children with them!
Thank you Danish
From JANESVILLE, WISCONSIN USA
My ex used to send a text after days asking what that series was we were watching again? Or what’s the name of that park we went to im gonna take the kids there? Of course prompting me to say ok I’ll come and the next thing we’re back together with no apologies or any resolving of the reason we split.
Thank you so much sir
My ex husband had an outburst at my sons game and I know it was directed at me
Very nice 👍 respected Sir!
Everything. Their minds go everywhere.
This is so true
Hopefully after watching your videos, survivors won't go to this trap
Omg! So true🧘💯🙏
You are so accurate
Perfectly describe sir
“What happened to our forever” idk you tell me ? No accountability no apology whatsoever ! Them says he’s waited for me all these years , I know he has another girl there ! Deff not coming back correct , just more manipulation
Weaponizing empathy is the exploitation of naïveté.
I was reading it is your birthday today wish you only great things for you God bless you every day for your wisdom and helping happy birthday