I know what makes men hot, and I’m as straight as floridan politicians want all kids to be. Did I just comment purely to make a joke on how dumb floridan (or is it floridian?) politicians are? Yes. But the statement is true.
I think it comes from old generations of people, who comes from times were speaking about that was considered weird so they are just a little ignorant like my parents, I don't blame them tho
Maybe that is coming from confusion with different sexualities. I am demi (and pan) and I do not really know who is attractive, attraction comes with feelings for me, so it is a weird concept to see someone unknown as attractive to me :D including like actors and other public figures others find often attractive, never understood that.
I find funny that a lot of people think that lesbians are lesbians because they hate men because it has nothing to with that, i am just attracted to women but i am okay with having platonic relationships with men it's just that i'm not romantically attracted to men that's all. The same way straight men aren't attracted to men but they still like men don't they, they like them as friends so it's the same thing for me! also yep straight women are always the ones complaining about men in my fyp lol
@ville__dude you’ve commented this so many times on this video at that point you are a lesbian for keeping up with this comment section so much 😂 Jesus
Some men really see "woman who doesn't want to f*ck/date me" and interpret that as hatred, which...imagine living the kind of life that lets you think that
@ville__ youve taken time out of your life to reply to a load comments that says they r a lesbian with... this, please get a hobby 🫶🫶 i promise your life will become so much more fufilling when your not so full of hate
Yes!! As an nb with a more masc look (ie short hair and men's clothes) I have always felt the eyes of women in public washrooms but the past few years have been so much worse. I've been trying to explain this to my cis male partner and he's kind about it but doesn't notice it at all.
I loved seeing them debunk common misconceptions and seeing their perspectives. So many people, even in the LGBT community, make weird assumptions about lesbians or are downright weird about us.
Masc lesbian representation is so important. There are plenty of lesbians that have preference for masc lesbians and there can be confusion around attraction to masculinity and that making it easier to fall into comp het. My lesbian awakening was Vi from Arcane, she made me realize that I was attracted to masculine women and it helped me fully come out of the closet as lesbian. Also let's not forget about androgynous lesbians, not everyone has to fit into masc or femme and I love being in that in-between. Happy Pride month to all the lesbians out there, there is no right time or age to realize you are lesbian!🧡🤍💓
its all thats spoken about. women that are slightly masc are always joked about being sterotypes for lesbians. all the time. and even with this, all the lesbians are on the tomboy side. i always have people telling me theyre shocked im a lebian because im so feminine (😭) not only am i very feminine, but im also only attracted to very feminine. to me, tomboys and the like are very unattractive. its a very simple preference that so many people fit under, BUT YOU ONLY SEE MASC LESBIANS EVERYWHERE with bisexual girls, theyre more fem BUT THEYRE ALWAYS WITH A GUY??? like is it something about more feminine girls and and being shy with their gayness or something???? im gonna be single forever idk why this comment turned into a rant. i dont evben remember why i was replying.
@@byunrosie You are confusing representation with real world stereotypes. As far as representation in media goes it is almost entirely femme lesbians or femme bi women, or maybe one is slightly androgynous. Masc lesbians are almost entirely absent from any romantic plot lines in media. There is validity to how you feel about being a femme lesbian in real life, those frustrations are valid and I wish this interview would have had a femme lesbian to give her perspective. But in my comment I am talking about lesbian representation IN MEDIA and how it is lacking masc lesbians.
@@byunrosie My comment is not showing up I am not sure why, so just in case I will leave another comment. You are valid in your feelings and I wish they had a femme on this episode to bring up the unique perspective that femme lesbians have. However, I am talking about representation in media not real life stereotypes or community, and that is almost entirely femme presenting people or maybe a little androgynous. Masc is severely lacking in media representation.
10:38 this is why I am sooo adamant about bringing back bi-curious as a label and not just bisexual. For the longest time ppl would use bi-curious and it should be more of the norm of your someone who is experimenting and doesn’t really know what you like yet. It would cause EVERYONE involved less trouble
@@offshot1st I think it's more that some younger people don't know about the term. I've heard of it myself, as a Gen Z, but even then that was fairly recently. But I don't see it in use much, but then again, I know I'm a gay trans guy so I keep to my friends or people who already know if they're queer or not. (Not out of hate for people experimenting, a lot of them is just younger and I'm older gen z so it just happens naturally) Think I've seen people use "questioning" a lot more or maybe even "queer" since it's not a definitive label.
Though, to add: I do remember a guy in class who called himself bi who turned out to just have been questioning and later found out he was straight. So I guess some people do just use the label even if they're a bit unsure.
@@offshot1st it is but ppl will just say bisexual usually. Not everyone does this, but I know quite a few who have and I think I know why. I say this as a young person myself (22) so I hope I don’t offend. But I think it stems from lots of young ppl, especially young girls, not fully understanding their sexuality yet but wanting to find community because let’s be real, being a teen and young adult in this day and age is hard enough as it is, so ofc you want to find likeminded ppl and basically a built in friend group. It’s something you can easily bond over with ppl and expand your friend group and social scene. Like it comes down to wanting that community that the lgbtq+ community brings even tho they might still be unsure. To clarify I’m specifically referring to people who are bicurious, don’t fully know how they feel sexually, but will still label themselves as bi
@@moonchild971 nah you're good. I just wish when i was your age I had more older gays to talk to. The generations above me were hit with the aids crisis so I honestly only met a few older gays. One of which was at a really crucial time and Ill forever be thankful. My experience of the lgbt community was the only place you could be out and garantee your safety. And even then I had flatmates dragged inside a car and beaten up - outside gay clubs all kinds of stuff. Can't imagine anyone from my era (do you realise how olde you are making me feel rn lol) calling themselves anything remotely queer until they knew at least 95% for sure because of the risks. And frankly it wasnt anywhere near as bad as the generation above. I honestly cannot comprehend what they went through . But back on point - I guess in hidesight most "bi-curious" people usually ended up being closeted bisexuals anyway. Because I honestly cannot remember any guys ID as bi-curious. There was alot attitude that bisexual men = gay, and bisexual girls are just doing it for the male gaze from wider society. *eyerolls* It was mostly girls in and out of relationships with guys calling themselves bi-curious. Maybe it was more digestable for their partner idk. So i guess it makes sense its died out. But I reaaaalllh get what OP is saying. Noone wants to be stung by the "I wasnt sure so I was experimenting" as a breakup discussion. If you ID as curious everyone knows the score going in just from that.
I agree with the lesbian representation being more needed in media! I wrote a research paper years ago about how women in women love women relationships are killed off more in shows than any other sexuality.
In the 7th grade, there was a field trip, and we had to pick 3 people to room with, but only one person would be guaranteed only two of my friends were going and they both put the same girl as there third and told me I should. The day before the trip, a rumor that had started in elementary school started going around again the rumor that I was a lesbian and this time, I stopped denying it. The only person on my list that I got roomed with it was the friend of my friends that I hadn't met. And her mom, the chaperone, she was friends with all my bullies. They killed a stick bug on a bed when we first got there. Even though I warned them, it would smell, and then they tried to make me sleep there, which I refused. They freaked out anytime I wanted to shower and barakaded the. Shower room and acted like I was gonna go get in an occupied shower stall they said I couldn't until everyone else was done, but then when that came, it was too late, and I needed to let them sleep. They pushed all the beds in a cabin into one bit bed, to be as far away from me as possible. And we're loudly making fun of me on many occasions just trying to hurt my feelings. But in high school, when the more popular queer kids started coming out, all of a sudden, they were so accepting of gay people.
I wish people weren't like that to you. It hurts because I know what that's like. I was recently outed to my family and it's very similar to this. What hurts more is that my mother doesn't seem to care which is weird because she claims to be pansexual.
17:07 no cause even as a bisexual I've had moments where people would think I'm weird or a predator because I like women, like I remember one time in my school girls were changing in the restroom and my "friend" rushed me out the restroom and said "you can't watch them change cause you like girls what if you do something" as if I couldn't controll myself or something??? definitely a horrible core memory😭😭😭
Yeah, I sadly think it's sort of because that's how women expect their treatment to be from the people who are attracted to them, even though it's from other women? Plus, obviously the way queerness has been villainized in movies and TV shows, not even that long ago, plays a huge part too. Your friend might not be queerphobic but still might hold some of those beliefs. You can maybe try to educate them or at least get them to educate themselves on this. Maybe also say that; you would never do anything to hurt another woman, even if you do find them attractive. Anyways, I wish you luck and if your friend doesn't learn then I hope you find someone who doesn't treat you like you're a predator!!
It is interesting how if two guys hold hands, everyone will assume they are gay or just try to insult them as being gay, but for girls it is almost the other way around x3 And I guess biphobia is the same from lesbians as it is from gay men then, heard a lot of untrusty or insulting comments against me due to that lol
it probably has to do with gender roles and ideas ppl have abt relationships, for some reason ppl think girls are just naturally more affectionate so it's normal to see 2 girls holding hands and still be friends, but if a guy does that it's gay bc it's too feminine to show your emotions and that you care for your friends
@@chickenanddoodles Definitely! Even in school from early age we learned, that for being affectionate with another guy or showing femininity, you will get laughed at and called gay. So people are just programmed that way. I heard that it got a bit better now, with more people being open with their sexuality, young people too, so it is more and more becoming "normal", just slowly.
A big problem with the LGBTQ+ community is that some people are so deep into it, the different boxes of LGBTQ+ start fighting each other. And you can't have normal discussions anymore because if you don't have 100% the same opinion, you're a homophobe.
@@donder91 That's Because 95% of the time the argument people are having is whether or not LGBTQ people can exist and have rights/freedom/acceptance. If you disagree with that then you're a Homophobe that's just the definition of the word.
Thank god for the only lesbian video in the past 2 years that didn’t get into a debate about mtfs. Regardless of differing opinions, it’s really important that we aren’t forced to debate that every time we want to talk about lesbian culture and issues. Good job to the video creators.
as a lesbian thank you for making this video. It’s nice to see some good candid LGBTQ+ conversations that center around lived experiences as a lesbian! :)
I remember in highschool in my friendgroup we used to say “You know, 1 in 10 people are gay, who do you think in our group is the gay one?” And i always immediately picked myself (in my head)😂 “Like yea, i guess i could be the gay one”. Yet i just accepted it and moved on, didn’t spare much thought to it lol
yupppp as a bisexual I cannot stannndddd ppl who are experimenting claiming a concrete label and leading ppl on. its all cool if you're upfront and honest about your situation. if someone feels "tricked'' after that then that's on them for being delusional tbh
After 10 years of having mixed feelings about my own sexuality, I've decided to call myself bisexual even though I'm not completely sure about it myself. I know that I like women, but despite experimenting a little I still don't have it clear how I feel about men. I know there is no romantic attraction but the other stuff was not unpleasant. I definitely prefer women more that's for sure. For me it felt better to say I'm bi and possibly never do anything with it again the rest of my life. Then to say I'm straight and feel like I am hiding something. Let's be careful not to gatekeep! Let's be happy more people feel safe to experiment and experience. Perhaps one day we can drop all names and truly just say love = love.
@@donder91 i mean that’s great for you. i have a similar experience of knowing i like women and nonbinary ppl (as a “female” not necessarily a woman…idk gender is weird) but sort of going back and forth abt men. not romantically interested in them at this point, but the thing is i won’t call myself a lesbian at this time because im just not sure. so bi is fine for now. is it really gate-keeping to say there’s a difference between a bisexual and a bi-curious straigh(?) person experimenting? my whole point was as long as you’re upfront abt your situation i don’t see an issue but if you’re literally just experimenting and calling yourself bisexual then…i mean it definitely doesn’t help the stigma. 🤷🏾♀️ idk it’s complicated
@@alexciad3741 That is fair. If you get drunk some time and indeed think 'I wonder what it's like' calling yourself bi or gay is a bit much indeed. I am sometimes a bit harsh about these subjects. There is a part of the LGBTQ+ that believes they speak for everyone who is LGBTQ+ and if you don't agree 100% with it, even if you are part of LGBTQ+ you are also defined as a homophobe. And it bothers me quite a bit.
@@theskitty27 It's the same thing as only having ace women discussing asexuality as a whole, there are different experiences for different people and styles.
thank you so much for making this episode!! as someone closeted and without a community of other wlw right now it can get lonely but it was really great to hear other lesbians talk about their experiences.
@ville__ Do you have some kind of humiliation kink? You make these stupid comments all over youtube but never have anything to say when you are called out. If you want to troll be better at it because it just gives pathetic.😂😂😂
Bi- curious < Bisexual there is a difference. Bi-curious is a dl girl that has or wants to be with a women. Bisexual women are certain that they can and have been in long term relationships with men and same sex!
No you are wrong. 'sexual' and 'romantic' are two different things. You can be biromantic and asexual. Meaning you could have a relationship with either gender, but don't want to have intercourse with them. Or you could be bisexual and aromantic, or bisexual and hetroromantic. There are many different forms. Bi-curious would indeed mean you just don't know how you feel about it while bisexual you do know. But in the end both are part of being 'bi'. The most important thing is that people can just choose whatever they want to call themselves. LGBTQ is not an instution, there are no rules or laws as to how people should identify themselves. Let's not do gatekeeping.
As a lesbian I don't find men attractive but you can see that even a dog is pretty without being attracted it, this applies to any human being as well. I'm gay it mos Definitely disqualifies my opinion because I'm not phyiscally attracted to men duh. 0 dudes are attractive but sure I can set my sister up on a date with a handsome man. U get it
If I was on a first date and one of the first questions would be about astrology, girl i’m outta there. It’s not an ice-breaker, it’s a deal-breaker for me
i’m excited to watch this but i’m confused as to why this is on the anthony padilla channel without anthony padilla in it just asking, i don’t mean that i need to see anthony padilla
on the "Experimenter" bit; s3xual attraction and romantic attraction are not the same, and need not match in a given individual. If someone identifies as a woman and is attracted _sexually_ to women, but also to men etc., then she's Bi- _sexual._ claiming otherwise is stereotypical Bi Erasure. However; she may find that she doesn't want to be in long-term relationships with anyone except someone id'ing as a man. This would classify her as _Hetero-romantic._ but she's _still_ bi-s3xual. conversely, if she is s3xually attracted to both basic genders, but only romantically attracted to women, she'd be bi-s3xual and _homo-romantic._ NOTE: (I tried to keep it simple here, and wasn't aiming for pan/trans erasure, as i'd be erasing myself! I personally consider Pan to be attraction to most/all gender id's, not just the basic ones, and Bi to be focused on the basic ones, but that choice in terminology is a personal one, you do you and use the terms that feel right to you and express yourself!)
@@jijitters I do. You understand that I was explaining the accepted definitions and terms regarding the difference between S3xual and Romantic attraction baselines, right?
@@jijitters respectfully disagree. Most people, _apparently including this guest,_ do not know that s3xual attraction and romantic attraction _are not the same._ Especially since it's extremely unlikely to occur in people who aren't bi/pan. so pooing on "experimenters' who don't know that, and haven't yet figured it out, while also not know it oneself: or claiming/insinuating that someone isn't actually _bis3xual_ *because* they're not also _bi-romantic,_ which is a common misunderstanding amongst people who's s3xual and romantic attractions match: constitutes *Bi/pan Erasure* (even though it's not intentional, nor malicious, it's _just_ a misunderstanding). her hurt is fully valid, but would be mitigated if she understood more of what those people: who're different from herself: are experiencing. People who're not bi/pan are constantly denying or erasing the identity, deliberately or otherwise, and it's through misunderstandings like that that much of it happens (when it isn't malicious). it's like that meme of 2 buff arms clasping hands: one says "Straights" the other says "Lesbians & Gays" and the clasp says "thinking Bi/Pan are just confused (gays) in denial". The more we understand a thing, the less upsetting that thing will be, in general.
I don’t fully understand the idea of a homosexual individual being necessary to act as a homosexual in a show or movie. Acting is the act of being something you’re not. But I can understand bringing a homosexual person in for an accuracy check to make sure the representation is more accurate
@@rala8051 I suppose then we should advocate for no discrimination in the industry. I guess from my perspective there are better ways to make things equitable for people of all backgrounds and races if you focus on discrimination rather than solely representation. Like I have autism and I suppose I’m more worried about accuracy of the representation more so than having someone on the spectrum to gain the role, and that if an autistic person is capable of acting that I would want them to not be discriminated against because they are on the spectrum. I think representation is important, just how it’s gone about doing that representation I think is equally important.
@ville__ Being an asshole is a choice, but since you insist, try kissing someone from the same sex *and liking it*, or just tell me that it's like kissing a brick wall or worse, like it probably is for you. And if you refuse, that's your problem, you're too afraid to admit that you're wrong, and know that you don't want to kiss someone of the same sex already. It's pure hypocrisy.
@ville__ Your ignorance is fucking vile. Absolutely abhorrent. You're comparing child molesting and abuse to adults liking other adults romantically and/or sexually in a way that doesn't perfectly align with the way you're attracted to people, in content aimed towards adult and late-teen audiences that are not even new to sexual topics. If you truthfully watched this video, realized what the audience's ages are, and still hold these views, please don't come anywhere near children again. And maybe get castrated, because what the actual fuck. At that point you're basically saying that the vile content you mentioned is preferable to consensual adult relationships. I know a lot of people that lost their virginity around 15 years old to other people their age consensually without an adult even knowing about it. So if you're gonna play pretend and argue that people around 15 and older(up to 18) shouldn't know about sexual topics, at least know that I'm happy that I didn't experience any teen pregnancy, because I actually got educated and knew how to stay safe.
You all should have asked bout recent assumptions that lesbians are transphobic, more specifically, to clear the air. But they are right about being harassed at bathrooms for being more masc. I had a colleague that was reported for going to women's bathroom even though she is a cis woman. She just looked more masc.
It would have been cool to see different types of lesbians represented. It's all really masculine androgynous types here. I also don't mean to be rude either. I think any representation is great, and they all deserve to have a voice.
Im in rural Australia, where Im sorry to say this kind of thinking is alive and well arrgghh I went through a stage where I wanted to be out and proud to be in my community. I was ready to squash all the myths. The worst comment was from a well meaning relation. I know she loves me, but she still says...we know a few gays, and you are nothing like them ?? If you dont keep looking for a man, you will miss out on having a baby !! And the worst came from a girl I was interested in. We didnt work out. More than 10 years later, she still knows who Im seeing, and tries to warn the women away from me...grr...theres not even any reason I know of that she does this. I am a lesbian, a WLW, femme, a little bit Alpha, and proud to be ❤❤ Irish Australians REPRESENT!
My thoughts on the "girls experimenting calling themselves bisexual " thing: As a bisexual woman i have mixed feelings about this. On one hand i have been "used" as an experiment , lead on etc just to be told that "oh i dont date women " or "i dont like women like that" and that sucks. As much as it sucks though i also have understanding that some people dont know their sexuality and some people do actually believe they may be bisexual or lesbian but then somewhere along the way they figure out "oh shit this wasnt for me" i think the important thing is how you communicate it amongst the people involved.
The assumption that lesbians don't know when men are attractive is so weird. Like I'm a straight girl but I know when another woman is attractive
I know what makes men hot, and I’m as straight as floridan politicians want all kids to be. Did I just comment purely to make a joke on how dumb floridan (or is it floridian?) politicians are? Yes. But the statement is true.
I think it comes from old generations of people, who comes from times were speaking about that was considered weird so they are just a little ignorant like my parents, I don't blame them tho
I think it's bc a lot of straight men are still pretending that they never acknowledge other dudes as being attractive
Maybe that is coming from confusion with different sexualities. I am demi (and pan) and I do not really know who is attractive, attraction comes with feelings for me, so it is a weird concept to see someone unknown as attractive to me :D including like actors and other public figures others find often attractive, never understood that.
I'm straight and I find it hard to recognise when men are handsome, unless it's super obvious. I think some guys think it works both ways
These girls got me over here giggling and twirling my hair
Good for you👍
Omg same 😭
SAME OMG
@ville__get a job, or go do your homework please.. you're chronically online
@ville__ we all make bad choices sometimes like your parents for example when they chose to have you. Have some understanding please 🙏
Ironically, I've never met a lesbian that hated men, while I've met two straight married women (both now divorced) who definitely did, though 😅.
honestly the number of heterosexual women out there is proof in it of itself that sexuality is not a choice lmao
@ville__ so is hating gay people
@ville__even if it was I'm gonna choose it every time
@ville__Every woman rejecting you is a choice. A good choice.
For real! The only women I've ever met that hate men are the women that date them 😂
I find funny that a lot of people think that lesbians are lesbians because they hate men because it has nothing to with that, i am just attracted to women but i am okay with having platonic relationships with men it's just that i'm not romantically attracted to men that's all. The same way straight men aren't attracted to men but they still like men don't they, they like them as friends so it's the same thing for me! also yep straight women are always the ones complaining about men in my fyp lol
@@miroh8 felt
@ville__dude you’ve commented this so many times on this video at that point you are a lesbian for keeping up with this comment section so much 😂 Jesus
@ville__ being stupid is a choice 🦄
@@Rubythereaper pls they need to get real problems so they can leave us alone
Some men really see "woman who doesn't want to f*ck/date me" and interpret that as hatred, which...imagine living the kind of life that lets you think that
as a lesbian, I love this selection of lesbians ❤
@ville__ youve taken time out of your life to reply to a load comments that says they r a lesbian with... this, please get a hobby 🫶🫶 i promise your life will become so much more fufilling when your not so full of hate
Wish there was a femme tho :(
@ville__ Being a fucking moron is a choice. I see you've made that decision and are great at it.
@@00droo00 yeah, kinda missed that too. All 3 of them were more in the masculine direction.
@ville__ And if it was a choice, I would choose to be gayer
Dude, I'm butch and I can tell you that I've always had issues in public bathrooms but over the last five years it's gotten way, way worse.
I'm Masc and it has actually gotten alot better for me. Sorry bruh could just be the city you live in
I have short hair and I'm just very broad looking and even as a cis woman I've gotten attacked for using the women's washroom.
Yes!! As an nb with a more masc look (ie short hair and men's clothes) I have always felt the eyes of women in public washrooms but the past few years have been so much worse. I've been trying to explain this to my cis male partner and he's kind about it but doesn't notice it at all.
I loved seeing them debunk common misconceptions and seeing their perspectives. So many people, even in the LGBT community, make weird assumptions about lesbians or are downright weird about us.
Masc lesbian representation is so important. There are plenty of lesbians that have preference for masc lesbians and there can be confusion around attraction to masculinity and that making it easier to fall into comp het. My lesbian awakening was Vi from Arcane, she made me realize that I was attracted to masculine women and it helped me fully come out of the closet as lesbian. Also let's not forget about androgynous lesbians, not everyone has to fit into masc or femme and I love being in that in-between. Happy Pride month to all the lesbians out there, there is no right time or age to realize you are lesbian!🧡🤍💓
Vi is so hot fr. I'm bi but she's like the best lol
@@courtneywatson797 She really is the best! I am glad you think so too
its all thats spoken about. women that are slightly masc are always joked about being sterotypes for lesbians. all the time. and even with this, all the lesbians are on the tomboy side. i always have people telling me theyre shocked im a lebian because im so feminine (😭) not only am i very feminine, but im also only attracted to very feminine. to me, tomboys and the like are very unattractive. its a very simple preference that so many people fit under, BUT YOU ONLY SEE MASC LESBIANS EVERYWHERE
with bisexual girls, theyre more fem BUT THEYRE ALWAYS WITH A GUY??? like is it something about more feminine girls and and being shy with their gayness or something???? im gonna be single forever
idk why this comment turned into a rant. i dont evben remember why i was replying.
@@byunrosie You are confusing representation with real world stereotypes. As far as representation in media goes it is almost entirely femme lesbians or femme bi women, or maybe one is slightly androgynous. Masc lesbians are almost entirely absent from any romantic plot lines in media. There is validity to how you feel about being a femme lesbian in real life, those frustrations are valid and I wish this interview would have had a femme lesbian to give her perspective. But in my comment I am talking about lesbian representation IN MEDIA and how it is lacking masc lesbians.
@@byunrosie My comment is not showing up I am not sure why, so just in case I will leave another comment. You are valid in your feelings and I wish they had a femme on this episode to bring up the unique perspective that femme lesbians have. However, I am talking about representation in media not real life stereotypes or community, and that is almost entirely femme presenting people or maybe a little androgynous. Masc is severely lacking in media representation.
Jen was my first youtube crush back when Buzzfeed was alive omggggg
no but same!!
omg i was wondering where i recognized her from
I met her back in those days, I even got a pic! I love to see how much she has grown since then.
@ville__ Being a fucking moron is a choice. I see you've made that decision and are great at it.
In case youre not up to date with her, she still makes content on the Kitchen and Jorn channel ❤
I see Jen, I click.
Same!
10:38 this is why I am sooo adamant about bringing back bi-curious as a label and not just bisexual. For the longest time ppl would use bi-curious and it should be more of the norm of your someone who is experimenting and doesn’t really know what you like yet. It would cause EVERYONE involved less trouble
wait... bicurious isnt used any more? I guess I must be olde lol
@@offshot1st I think it's more that some younger people don't know about the term. I've heard of it myself, as a Gen Z, but even then that was fairly recently.
But I don't see it in use much, but then again, I know I'm a gay trans guy so I keep to my friends or people who already know if they're queer or not. (Not out of hate for people experimenting, a lot of them is just younger and I'm older gen z so it just happens naturally)
Think I've seen people use "questioning" a lot more or maybe even "queer" since it's not a definitive label.
Though, to add: I do remember a guy in class who called himself bi who turned out to just have been questioning and later found out he was straight. So I guess some people do just use the label even if they're a bit unsure.
@@offshot1st it is but ppl will just say bisexual usually. Not everyone does this, but I know quite a few who have and I think I know why.
I say this as a young person myself (22) so I hope I don’t offend.
But I think it stems from lots of young ppl, especially young girls, not fully understanding their sexuality yet but wanting to find community because let’s be real, being a teen and young adult in this day and age is hard enough as it is, so ofc you want to find likeminded ppl and basically a built in friend group. It’s something you can easily bond over with ppl and expand your friend group and social scene. Like it comes down to wanting that community that the lgbtq+ community brings even tho they might still be unsure.
To clarify I’m specifically referring to people who are bicurious, don’t fully know how they feel sexually, but will still label themselves as bi
@@moonchild971 nah you're good. I just wish when i was your age I had more older gays to talk to. The generations above me were hit with the aids crisis so I honestly only met a few older gays. One of which was at a really crucial time and Ill forever be thankful.
My experience of the lgbt community was the only place you could be out and garantee your safety. And even then I had flatmates dragged inside a car and beaten up - outside gay clubs all kinds of stuff.
Can't imagine anyone from my era (do you realise how olde you are making me feel rn lol) calling themselves anything remotely queer until they knew at least 95% for sure because of the risks. And frankly it wasnt anywhere near as bad as the generation above. I honestly cannot comprehend what they went through .
But back on point - I guess in hidesight most "bi-curious" people usually ended up being closeted bisexuals anyway.
Because I honestly cannot remember any guys ID as bi-curious. There was alot attitude that bisexual men = gay, and bisexual girls are just doing it for the male gaze from wider society. *eyerolls*
It was mostly girls in and out of relationships with guys calling themselves bi-curious. Maybe it was more digestable for their partner idk.
So i guess it makes sense its died out.
But I reaaaalllh get what OP is saying. Noone wants to be stung by the "I wasnt sure so I was experimenting" as a breakup discussion. If you ID as curious everyone knows the score going in just from that.
Not Jen aging like a fine wine 😭
In case youre not up to date with her, she still makes content on the Kitchen and Jorn channel ❤
I agree with the lesbian representation being more needed in media! I wrote a research paper years ago about how women in women love women relationships are killed off more in shows than any other sexuality.
AOT SPOILER
*cough* ymir
Where can I read it?
Yooooo that girl on the right with the green hat 😩😩 SHE’S SO PRETTY
Reallll she’s actually stunning
Way too butch and mean.
Goooooorrrgeous ❤❤❤
In the 7th grade, there was a field trip, and we had to pick 3 people to room with, but only one person would be guaranteed only two of my friends were going and they both put the same girl as there third and told me I should. The day before the trip, a rumor that had started in elementary school started going around again the rumor that I was a lesbian and this time, I stopped denying it. The only person on my list that I got roomed with it was the friend of my friends that I hadn't met. And her mom, the chaperone, she was friends with all my bullies. They killed a stick bug on a bed when we first got there. Even though I warned them, it would smell, and then they tried to make me sleep there, which I refused. They freaked out anytime I wanted to shower and barakaded the. Shower room and acted like I was gonna go get in an occupied shower stall they said I couldn't until everyone else was done, but then when that came, it was too late, and I needed to let them sleep. They pushed all the beds in a cabin into one bit bed, to be as far away from me as possible. And we're loudly making fun of me on many occasions just trying to hurt my feelings. But in high school, when the more popular queer kids started coming out, all of a sudden, they were so accepting of gay people.
ugh, that’s horrible :( so sorry they did that to u!
Sorry that happened to you. It's terrible how some people behave.
@bubgerkirg @donder91 thanks I wish I stood up for myself more as a kid. Tho I shrill struggle to.
I wish people weren't like that to you. It hurts because I know what that's like. I was recently outed to my family and it's very similar to this. What hurts more is that my mother doesn't seem to care which is weird because she claims to be pansexual.
That's fucked
I love that you got 3 masc lebians with different backgrounds. They had such a great connection 😀 would love to see one with all femme!
it's been like ten minutes and I'm already a big fan of Josselyn 😂😂
@ville__ Being a fucking moron is a choice. I see you've made that decision and are great at it.
@ville__ u should chose it for a day then
@@raccoon_bones w response
Me too
17:07 no cause even as a bisexual I've had moments where people would think I'm weird or a predator because I like women, like I remember one time in my school girls were changing in the restroom and my "friend" rushed me out the restroom and said "you can't watch them change cause you like girls what if you do something" as if I couldn't controll myself or something??? definitely a horrible core memory😭😭😭
Yeah, I sadly think it's sort of because that's how women expect their treatment to be from the people who are attracted to them, even though it's from other women?
Plus, obviously the way queerness has been villainized in movies and TV shows, not even that long ago, plays a huge part too. Your friend might not be queerphobic but still might hold some of those beliefs.
You can maybe try to educate them or at least get them to educate themselves on this. Maybe also say that; you would never do anything to hurt another woman, even if you do find them attractive.
Anyways, I wish you luck and if your friend doesn't learn then I hope you find someone who doesn't treat you like you're a predator!!
let's go, lesbians, let's go!!!
I agree! Let’s get them out of here!
Here we go lesbians! here we go lesbians, come on!
i can‘t go, i have a cat in my lap
@ville__Ragebait
@@ToothpasteIsGettingExpensivefuck is your problem?
Honestly, thanks to this, I'm now obsessed with Mitski and can't believe I've been missing out on such gorgeous music.
Jen became the dream guest on your podcast?!
@ville__ Being a fucking moron is a choice. I see you've made that decision and are great at it.
@ville__slay i guess
this group has the best vibes & i’m pretty sure i have a crush on josselyn now lol
Lesbians need more love in the community 🗣️♥️
FACTS
They are all so angry.
So true
It is interesting how if two guys hold hands, everyone will assume they are gay or just try to insult them as being gay, but for girls it is almost the other way around x3
And I guess biphobia is the same from lesbians as it is from gay men then, heard a lot of untrusty or insulting comments against me due to that lol
@ville__ Don't you get tired of yourself? Go kiss your pillow or something because no sane man or woman would want to kiss you.
it probably has to do with gender roles and ideas ppl have abt relationships, for some reason ppl think girls are just naturally more affectionate so it's normal to see 2 girls holding hands and still be friends, but if a guy does that it's gay bc it's too feminine to show your emotions and that you care for your friends
@@chickenanddoodles Definitely!
Even in school from early age we learned, that for being affectionate with another guy or showing femininity, you will get laughed at and called gay. So people are just programmed that way.
I heard that it got a bit better now, with more people being open with their sexuality, young people too, so it is more and more becoming "normal", just slowly.
A big problem with the LGBTQ+ community is that some people are so deep into it, the different boxes of LGBTQ+ start fighting each other. And you can't have normal discussions anymore because if you don't have 100% the same opinion, you're a homophobe.
@@donder91 That's Because 95% of the time the argument people are having is whether or not LGBTQ people can exist and have rights/freedom/acceptance. If you disagree with that then you're a Homophobe that's just the definition of the word.
Thank god for the only lesbian video in the past 2 years that didn’t get into a debate about mtfs. Regardless of differing opinions, it’s really important that we aren’t forced to debate that every time we want to talk about lesbian culture and issues. Good job to the video creators.
*LET’S GO LESBIANS* ♥️🧡🤍🩷💜
hmmm, something about you makes me think u might be a lesbian…
Transphobia effects everyone! Even cis people. Love from a trans lesbian ❤
as a lesbian thank you for making this video. It’s nice to see some good candid LGBTQ+ conversations that center around lived experiences as a lesbian! :)
lets go lesbians
I remember in highschool in my friendgroup we used to say “You know, 1 in 10 people are gay, who do you think in our group is the gay one?” And i always immediately picked myself (in my head)😂 “Like yea, i guess i could be the gay one”. Yet i just accepted it and moved on, didn’t spare much thought to it lol
Love that for you
A league of their own would’ve been the perfect show. It’s so sad more people didn’t know about it 😢
Omg I’ve been wanting y’all to make this kind of video for so long, I love this discussion
Bless. This is they best cast for this topic ❤
Thank you for your service to the community Sir Anthony
Thank you!!
tysm for this happy pride
yupppp as a bisexual I cannot stannndddd ppl who are experimenting claiming a concrete label and leading ppl on. its all cool if you're upfront and honest about your situation. if someone feels "tricked'' after that then that's on them for being delusional tbh
After 10 years of having mixed feelings about my own sexuality, I've decided to call myself bisexual even though I'm not completely sure about it myself.
I know that I like women, but despite experimenting a little I still don't have it clear how I feel about men. I know there is no romantic attraction but the other stuff was not unpleasant. I definitely prefer women more that's for sure.
For me it felt better to say I'm bi and possibly never do anything with it again the rest of my life. Then to say I'm straight and feel like I am hiding something.
Let's be careful not to gatekeep! Let's be happy more people feel safe to experiment and experience. Perhaps one day we can drop all names and truly just say love = love.
@@donder91 i mean that’s great for you. i have a similar experience of knowing i like women and nonbinary ppl (as a “female” not necessarily a woman…idk gender is weird) but sort of going back and forth abt men. not romantically interested in them at this point, but the thing is i won’t call myself a lesbian at this time because im just not sure. so bi is fine for now. is it really gate-keeping to say there’s a difference between a bisexual and a bi-curious straigh(?) person experimenting? my whole point was as long as you’re upfront abt your situation i don’t see an issue but if you’re literally just experimenting and calling yourself bisexual then…i mean it definitely doesn’t help the stigma. 🤷🏾♀️ idk it’s complicated
@@alexciad3741 That is fair. If you get drunk some time and indeed think 'I wonder what it's like' calling yourself bi or gay is a bit much indeed.
I am sometimes a bit harsh about these subjects. There is a part of the LGBTQ+ that believes they speak for everyone who is LGBTQ+ and if you don't agree 100% with it, even if you are part of LGBTQ+ you are also defined as a homophobe. And it bothers me quite a bit.
As a queer man Lesbian bars are the best 👌🏽 best musc. Everyone is dancing, and it's positive vibes all around. ❤❤
If you’re a man don’t go to lesbian bars!
It's a shame that there isn't a super femme lesbian there. I would've loved to see that.
I’m sure you would
@ville__ it's not. being hateful is though.
@ville__ Being a fucking moron is a choice. I see you've made that decision and are great at it.
They get so much rep already
@@blackalwayspink not on a panel like this. Plus the stud just said they mostly case straight women as femme lesbians -3-
JEN OF THE KITCHEN AND JORN SHOW MY BELOVED girl you didn’t mention you’d be here 🥺 so glad to see ya here!
OMG Josselyn Morris!! I watch her speed dating lives on TikTok. I'm so glad to see her on here. I already know this video is gonna be good.
People responding to others saying being gay is a choice like their random dumbass opinion actually holds any weight is killing me lmao
They're replying to everyone like they're being paid for it 😭
we might have needed at least one femme but ah well they are all great otherwise
I agree!!
I agree! Such s bummer i feel like this video is seriously lacking without it
@@lezbhonest6592yeah im just thankful its sapphic tho and theres mascs at all fr but asf
This is a really weird thing to say to me? what does the way someone presents have to do with what they're going to discuss?
@@theskitty27 It's the same thing as only having ace women discussing asexuality as a whole, there are different experiences for different people and styles.
Not Kendahl mentioning Yellowjackets 😭😭😭
thank you so much for making this episode!! as someone closeted and without a community of other wlw right now it can get lonely but it was really great to hear other lesbians talk about their experiences.
Anthony padildo
HHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Love seeing the much needed masc representation!!!!
THIS is a lineup!!!
been wanting for this one❤❤
Let’s go lesbians 🎉
@ville__being ignorant is a choice
@ville__ Do you have some kind of humiliation kink? You make these stupid comments all over youtube but never have anything to say when you are called out. If you want to troll be better at it because it just gives pathetic.😂😂😂
@ville__ unfortunately stupidity like yours is not
@@MichelleHarris-zf6wn It's not a troll, it's a bot farming attention. Report it and move on.
“Vida” on Hulu has great queer representation 😁 I just binged the whole thing a week ago 😇💖
Bi- curious < Bisexual there is a difference. Bi-curious is a dl girl that has or wants to be with a women. Bisexual women are certain that they can and have been in long term relationships with men and same sex!
No you are wrong. 'sexual' and 'romantic' are two different things.
You can be biromantic and asexual. Meaning you could have a relationship with either gender, but don't want to have intercourse with them.
Or you could be bisexual and aromantic, or bisexual and hetroromantic.
There are many different forms.
Bi-curious would indeed mean you just don't know how you feel about it while bisexual you do know. But in the end both are part of being 'bi'.
The most important thing is that people can just choose whatever they want to call themselves. LGBTQ is not an instution, there are no rules or laws as to how people should identify themselves.
Let's not do gatekeeping.
@@donder91Nah you doing too much. That map is for asexual people. It doesn’t apply to bisexual / lesbian who aren’t ace.
i dont hate men, i just dont personally ever need to rely on any other than my dad 🤷♀
Hi Jorn!
Hi!
As a lesbian I don't find men attractive but you can see that even a dog is pretty without being attracted it, this applies to any human being as well. I'm gay it mos Definitely disqualifies my opinion because I'm not phyiscally attracted to men duh. 0 dudes are attractive but sure I can set my sister up on a date with a handsome man. U get it
There needs to be more lesbian content out there. Thank you for making this video about lesbo's! 😘
You should do assumptions on Polyamorus people!!
KENDAHLLLLL
If I was on a first date and one of the first questions would be about astrology, girl i’m outta there. It’s not an ice-breaker, it’s a deal-breaker for me
i’m excited to watch this but i’m confused as to why this is on the anthony padilla channel without anthony padilla in it
just asking, i don’t mean that i need to see anthony padilla
For my good gay representation, I watch asian gay shows.
That’s kinda fruity, don’t you think?
ong you picked some of my favorite internet lesbians 🥺 get dez the lez next time
on the "Experimenter" bit; s3xual attraction and romantic attraction are not the same, and need not match in a given individual.
If someone identifies as a woman and is attracted _sexually_ to women, but also to men etc., then she's Bi- _sexual._ claiming otherwise is stereotypical Bi Erasure.
However; she may find that she doesn't want to be in long-term relationships with anyone except someone id'ing as a man.
This would classify her as _Hetero-romantic._ but she's _still_ bi-s3xual.
conversely, if she is s3xually attracted to both basic genders, but only romantically attracted to women, she'd be bi-s3xual and _homo-romantic._
NOTE: (I tried to keep it simple here, and wasn't aiming for pan/trans erasure, as i'd be erasing myself! I personally consider Pan to be attraction to most/all gender id's, not just the basic ones, and Bi to be focused on the basic ones, but that choice in terminology is a personal one, you do you and use the terms that feel right to you and express yourself!)
Yeah I was thinking of romance vs sex split as well in that section
You understand plenty of people have sex with people they aren't attracted to for various reasons, right?
@@jijitters I do.
You understand that I was explaining the accepted definitions and terms regarding the difference between S3xual and Romantic attraction baselines, right?
@lady_draguliana784 Yes, my point is that is irrelevant information since that's obviously not what they were talking about.
@@jijitters respectfully disagree.
Most people, _apparently including this guest,_ do not know that s3xual attraction and romantic attraction _are not the same._ Especially since it's extremely unlikely to occur in people who aren't bi/pan.
so pooing on "experimenters' who don't know that, and haven't yet figured it out, while also not know it oneself: or claiming/insinuating that someone isn't actually _bis3xual_ *because* they're not also _bi-romantic,_ which is a common misunderstanding amongst people who's s3xual and romantic attractions match: constitutes *Bi/pan Erasure* (even though it's not intentional, nor malicious, it's _just_ a misunderstanding).
her hurt is fully valid, but would be mitigated if she understood more of what those people: who're different from herself: are experiencing.
People who're not bi/pan are constantly denying or erasing the identity, deliberately or otherwise, and it's through misunderstandings like that that much of it happens (when it isn't malicious).
it's like that meme of 2 buff arms clasping hands: one says "Straights" the other says "Lesbians & Gays" and the clasp says "thinking Bi/Pan are just confused (gays) in denial".
The more we understand a thing, the less upsetting that thing will be, in general.
I don’t fully understand the idea of a homosexual individual being necessary to act as a homosexual in a show or movie. Acting is the act of being something you’re not. But I can understand bringing a homosexual person in for an accuracy check to make sure the representation is more accurate
I think it is not about how good the performance is, but about having representation and seeing a successful person you can identify with.
@@rala8051 I suppose then we should advocate for no discrimination in the industry. I guess from my perspective there are better ways to make things equitable for people of all backgrounds and races if you focus on discrimination rather than solely representation. Like I have autism and I suppose I’m more worried about accuracy of the representation more so than having someone on the spectrum to gain the role, and that if an autistic person is capable of acting that I would want them to not be discriminated against because they are on the spectrum. I think representation is important, just how it’s gone about doing that representation I think is equally important.
wish there was a part 2
I'm loving this series so far.
Btw, I think one of these episodes involving trans people would go a long way considering all the ongoing attacks
@ville__ Being an asshole is a choice, but since you insist, try kissing someone from the same sex *and liking it*, or just tell me that it's like kissing a brick wall or worse, like it probably is for you. And if you refuse, that's your problem, you're too afraid to admit that you're wrong, and know that you don't want to kiss someone of the same sex already. It's pure hypocrisy.
@ville__ Your ignorance is fucking vile. Absolutely abhorrent. You're comparing child molesting and abuse to adults liking other adults romantically and/or sexually in a way that doesn't perfectly align with the way you're attracted to people, in content aimed towards adult and late-teen audiences that are not even new to sexual topics. If you truthfully watched this video, realized what the audience's ages are, and still hold these views, please don't come anywhere near children again. And maybe get castrated, because what the actual fuck. At that point you're basically saying that the vile content you mentioned is preferable to consensual adult relationships.
I know a lot of people that lost their virginity around 15 years old to other people their age consensually without an adult even knowing about it. So if you're gonna play pretend and argue that people around 15 and older(up to 18) shouldn't know about sexual topics, at least know that I'm happy that I didn't experience any teen pregnancy, because I actually got educated and knew how to stay safe.
Thought I was bi for years turns out I want just was a lesbian in denial 😭😭😭😭
Yay it’s Jorn!
Lesbians are cool as shit; I want some down-to-earth lesbian friends to just chill with & do normal shit that friends do
I LOVE KENDAHL
oh my god I’m realizing i haven’t seen Jen in YEARS. i missed them
The woman on the right looks really cool to me! I really like the hairstyle and the vibe!!
The censorship had me so confused for a minute. “Lesbian pff is not what be going on.” Took me a sec to catch up. 😅
I think It’d actually be really cool to see an interview with dude perfect
You all should have asked bout recent assumptions that lesbians are transphobic, more specifically, to clear the air. But they are right about being harassed at bathrooms for being more masc. I had a colleague that was reported for going to women's bathroom even though she is a cis woman. She just looked more masc.
The one thing people who study history and laymen have in common: They were roommates
I could watch them talk for hours haha. Love the vibe
It would have been cool to see different types of lesbians represented. It's all really masculine androgynous types here. I also don't mean to be rude either. I think any representation is great, and they all deserve to have a voice.
i thought i was gay - but 10 years ago i came out as asexual - lets go asexuals
Learning how others live and their experiences on this journey called life is so opening I love it💙💙
LETS GO LESBIANS HAPPY PRIDE 😝
These lesbians r so relatable 2 me as a gay guy. Like same thoughts, experiences, feelings but on the other end 😆🤭
OMG JEN😭😭😭😭
Tbf, there are some actual male creeps who try to get into the women's bathroom, esp at bars (I've had that experience)
I live in LA. And as a ledbian..i be wondering where are all the lesbians bookie is talking about😭💔
I have weed in the mans toilets. By mistake 😮. I locked the toilet door and had a pee. Big pissing deal 😂
wtf 😂
What is blood bageling about
As a Sixers fan, Oubre is gorgeous (I think Maxey is cuter but yk)
clicked at lightning speed when i saw Kendahl
Jen!! 🧡🧡🧡
jen looking HANDSOME
this how i picture northwest to look in the future.
Joss is so fucking fine
My assumption is that lesbians are in love with women. 👍🏻
how did you guys find three favorite lesbians?? esp joss
what’s the hosts name she’s so pretty 😭
Twenties is a good lesbian show.
Im in rural Australia, where Im sorry to say this kind of thinking is alive and well arrgghh I went through a stage where I wanted to be out and proud to be in my community. I was ready to squash all the myths. The worst comment was from a well meaning relation. I know she loves me, but she still says...we know a few gays, and you are nothing like them ?? If you dont keep looking for a man, you will miss out on having a baby !! And the worst came from a girl I was interested in. We didnt work out. More than 10 years later, she still knows who Im seeing, and tries to warn the women away from me...grr...theres not even any reason I know of that she does this. I am a lesbian, a WLW, femme, a little bit Alpha, and proud to be ❤❤ Irish Australians REPRESENT!
Where is Anthony?
18:19 as a lesbian crushes on straight girls were never a problem for me it was the bi girls that were way too pretty for me
My thoughts on the "girls experimenting calling themselves bisexual " thing:
As a bisexual woman i have mixed feelings about this. On one hand i have been "used" as an experiment , lead on etc just to be told that "oh i dont date women " or "i dont like women like that" and that sucks. As much as it sucks though i also have understanding that some people dont know their sexuality and some people do actually believe they may be bisexual or lesbian but then somewhere along the way they figure out "oh shit this wasnt for me" i think the important thing is how you communicate it amongst the people involved.
We're missing the biggest lesbian of all, Anthony