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7 Underrated Habits for a Better Life (and 7 Overrated Habits Too)
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- čas přidán 14. 08. 2024
- I just heard about the “bed rotting” trend on social media and I think I need a minute.
Because if the kids think staying in bed all day eating pizza and doom scrolling is a form of rejuvenation then I’m calling bullshit on self-care.
Today’s episode is a fun one. Drew and I have a long list of common self-improvement practices and I’m scoring them as overrated or underrated or, “it depends.”
Join in on the fun!
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00:00:00 Intro
00:01:43 Goals
00:03:50 Self-care
00:06:40 Romance
00:09:51 Friendship
00:12:23 Therapy
00:18:04 Purpose
00:20:40 Dancing/Music
00:24:46 Politics
00:28:45 Journaling
00:32:36 Cold Plunges and Saunas
00:37:15 Psychedelics
00:45:02 God
00:50:13 Gratitude
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Good self care looks identical to good parenting. Keeping yourself clean. Keeping your environment clean. Making yourself eat your vegatables. Forcing yourself to do things that are in your best interest, regardless of whether you feel like it. Self care = self parenting.
I’ve never thought about that before but that is so true!
💯💯💯💯
women!!
She doesn't even realize it but she just made everyone a child, so you are at her level.... Of course it has "to be JUST LIKE parenting, IDENTICAL".
😂😂😂😂😂😂
Silly silly comparison!!
@@ggrthemostgodless8713 Chill bro
@@a.m.h.2819
No... YOU grow the hell up. Stop infantilizing the world and grown men in general, always trying to make them children so YOU can deal with them.
“Self discipline is self-love” I love that
Older than my grandma
it means doing positive things like Mark ask
Self help is masturbation
Same
@@thetrickster9885 chill bro u don't have to go that hard😂
Finland here. If you can email in the sauna, you are doing it wrong. Optimal sauna temperature is between 160°F and 210°F, depending on the size of the room. Also, as you throw water on the stove, the steam will fill your device. There is also a difference between an electric sauna, and the traditional wood and fire-type, but I won't get into that.
One of the best things in sauna is the fact that you are unreachable, it's quiet (and preferably softly lit) and you fill your lungs with the warm air, relaxing your mind and your whole body.
If you're ever in Finland, traditional sauna is the best thing you can experience.
Thank you for saying this! When he said "email in the sauna", I thought "what the heck? How can you be doing that? Way too hot & slippery to be emailing!".
Korean, loves sauna. Hope one day I could visit there for original
I live in Florida. I don't Need a sauna.😎
We have an electric sauna at my gym. It's definitely not steamy like a real sauna but it is VERY hot and sweaty and every time I am in there, every other woman in with me is sitting there doing stuff on her phone. I do not understand it.
İ😊
I think friendship is underrated but acquaintances are even more underrated. In the last few years I've developed maybe 20 people in my life that I have consistently positive interactions with (even though I wouldn't consider them "friends" per se) and those relationships have improved my life exponentially.
Hi, I agree with your opinion, and networking is indeed such an important aspect of our lives. I wonder how you maintain relationships to remain as acquaintances. Should I keep checking in on them, or do I need to offer them something...
I agree. I love my neighbors. I don't want to hang out with most of them, but I love to wave hello and they look out for each other. It makes me feel safe.
The threshold between friendship and acquaintances is not clearly defined and fluent. There is also a highest number of people with whom you can have a valuable personal relationship (Dunbar number). In the range of this number, differentiation between friends and acquaintances might be fun, but not useful.
Want to congratulate you on this accomplishment - it's significant.
I'm 27 never had BEST FRIENDS like _I'll call someone and go for movies or a travel or go out shopping OR call for medical help_
I never even had a gf... Nor female friends
I only had Acquaintances.
I think there's a issue in me
Title: 7 Underrated Habits for a Better Life (and 7 Overrated Ones Too)
In today's episode, Mark and Drew explore commonly recommended habits for happiness and productivity, categorizing them as overrated or underrated based on their insights and experiences.
Underrated Habits:
1. Self-Discipline: Mark emphasizes the importance of self-discipline as a form of self-love. This involves doing things that may be challenging but beneficial in the long run, akin to parenting oneself.
2. Friendship over Romance: Despite societal emphasis on romantic relationships, Mark highlights the underrated value of friendships for mental health and happiness. Single individuals with strong social networks tend to be happier and healthier.
3. Therapy with Caution: While therapy is valuable, Mark warns against its over-reliance and emphasizes the need for compatibility with therapists. Therapy can worsen conditions if not properly managed, and finding the right fit is crucial.
4. Purpose: While having a sense of purpose is essential, Mark suggests that not everything needs to feel purposeful all the time. Mundane tasks can have profound meanings, and not everything requires a deeper purpose.
5. Dance as Therapy: Mark discusses the mood-elevating effects of dancing, suggesting it as an underrated form of therapy. Dancing can significantly improve mood and is an under-discussed method of self-care.
6. Realistic Expectations: Mark advises against idealizing solutions to complex societal issues. Understanding the messiness and imperfections of human systems can prevent disappointment and foster realistic change.
7. Gratitude Journaling: Drew reflects on the benefits of journaling, particularly gratitude journaling, in providing insight and perspective over time. While sporadic, journaling offers valuable self-reflection and personal growth.
Overrated Habits:
1. Goal Setting: Mark challenges the emphasis on specific goals, highlighting the importance of the journey over the destination. The value lies in the habits and actions taken, rather than achieving a predefined outcome.
2. Self-Indulgent Self-Care: While self-care is vital, Mark criticizes its portrayal as indulgent activities like spa weekends or extravagant trips. True self-care involves setting boundaries and prioritizing genuine well-being over superficial indulgence.
3. Romance over Friendship: Mark questions the overestimation of romantic relationships compared to friendships. Strong social connections with friends often contribute more to overall happiness and well-being.
4. Cold Plunges: Mark expresses skepticism towards the trend of cold plunges, citing limited long-term data on its benefits. While enjoyable and endorphin-releasing, the scientific evidence supporting its efficacy is questionable.
5. Overuse of Psychedelics: Mark cautions against the overuse of psychedelics for optimization purposes. While they may offer profound experiences, their transformative effects are not guaranteed, and their risks are often overlooked.
6. Overemphasis on Manifestation: Mark critiques the overemphasis on manifestation as a solution to life's challenges. While setting intentions is valuable, unrealistic expectations can lead to disappointment and disillusionment.
7. Superficial Gratitude Practices: Mark discusses the limitations of structured gratitude practices that feel self-indulgent or insincere. While gratitude is beneficial, genuine appreciation should be cultivated rather than forced.
Conclusion:
Mark and Drew conclude by encouraging listeners to critically evaluate commonly promoted habits and prioritize those that align with personal values and well-being. By distinguishing between overrated and underrated practices, individuals can cultivate a more balanced and fulfilling life.
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This summary captures the main points and supporting details from the provided transcript, highlighting the underrated and overrated habits discussed by Mark and Drew. Let me know if you need more information or further elaboration on any specific point!
You are absolutely thanked
Great summary 👌🏾
I love you for doing this
Thank you and bless you
Chat gpt. Altough it's still nice from him. @@barlowamandaful
Romance has derailed more relationships than railed them. That should be the quote of the century
Men don't like romance that doesn't lead to railing.
If you have found this in your relationships I see why it would come across as very transactional. If your partner does this now I think it would be worth a conversation. It might open up why they use it as a transaction.
@@neilrandle161 the juice isn't worth the squeeze my friend. I'm good.
I love quitting my goals; it’s my favorite part of the day.
😂😂😂
''all of your worst decisions were made while on romance.'' yep that checks out 100%.
when the little head stands up the big head turns off ....
1. Don't mistake self-care with self-indulgence
2. Goals should work for you not other way around
3. Nothing works for everyone and forever
5:23 I wasn't into going to the gym, but after you said self-care is like going to the gym when you don't want to go, it made my day.
100% agree about therapy, my first therapist was shockingly awful, so judgemental. I reckon she got her qualification from a cornflake packet. Never thought therapy would do any good after my experience with her. Then tried again and was lucky to be allocated an amazing, empathetic therapist, who changed my life.
For anyone searching, I’d recommend phd clinical psychologists as a starting point. There are so many social workers and others who call themselves therapists but haven’t undergone nearly as much training. I’m not saying you HAVE to have a PhD to be good, I’m saying that as a patient searching randomly online, your chances are much higher of not getting someone who exacerbates your problem if you find a real psychologist, particularly one who specializes in your particular problem. This is just simply by the virtue of the fact that the breadth and depth of their education and training more than doubled that of other licensures.
Psychiatrists can also be very hit or miss as their training focuses a lot on neurobiology and medication. And they’re crazy expensive because they spent hundreds of thousands on medical school, which teaches them virtually nothing about being a therapist.
Dancing, 100% mood booster! I go to a one hour YMCA Zumba class in the middle of my work week, every week, and it truly boosts my mood. Not only is it a great workout, I'm talking 800+ calories burned in the hour, but I have never been happier since I started doing it seven years ago. Underrated habit, everyone should dance!
Bought a projector and dance with the videos haha... Best morning routine ...ever
Yes 😊 😊😊 dancing is the best.
Hell yeah
Yes!
My 77 year old mother dances in her apartment every day as one of her forms of exercise. She loves it.
I'm so blessed to live a mile from the Salish Sea. My "terminal" cancer diagnosis was in 2004. I've had an infrared sauna in my garage since 2006 and spent 1-2 hours a day, 6 days a week for the first 18 months. Once I was healthy enough to work again, my use dropped to 3 hours a week. I continued to have new cancer every month. When 2020 rolled around, I was ready to give up on life. Praying that Mount Saint Helens would blow up when I climbed to the summit didn't work, so a week later, I walked into the Salish Sea, hoping a sea creature would take me out. 10 minutes in the cold, eliminated my desire to end everything...for a day. I went back. I now swim 20 minutes to an hour every day. I've had no new cancer since November 2020, a month after my daily cold water immersion started. As you said, just because it works for me, doesn't mean it'll work for everyone. Teaching the lessons I've learned along the way, were only possible due to getting my head on straight from the cold. I plan on always living close enough to cold saltwater to not need a cold plunge tub at home. Swimming with seals, sea lions, orcas and gray whales has given me so much joy! So much gratitude and appreciation!
Glad to hear no new progression. Peace 🕊️🕊️🕊️
@@urban_phantom7750 Thank you!! I learned so much from it though!
In Sweden you typically want to place the sauna right next to the sea/lake. As if the sauna were a boat house. Seconds after you exit the hot sauna, you enter the cold water. So, sauna and cold plunge is one activity, not separate ones. I would not bring an electronic device into a sauna; it's too hot in there and I'm too sweaty.
Cold plunge - cold water for rich people (Caroline Winkler).
Cold showers are just as beneficial.
Came for the advice, stayed for the Caroline Winkler shout out
Boiling hot showers ftw
Both work @@Vivi_9
Or do it the scandinavian way: Go to the sauna and then take a deep into the sea. Repeat. It is the most amazing and relaxing experience ever. It costs very little.
Or, if you are very courageous, just go for winter swimming, no sauna before. It is free.
theres no peer reviewed literature on the benefits of cold showers
18:40 19:17 this hit me like a punch in the stomach. I’m obsessed with philosophy and finding the path toward the best possible life and learning all the right things to know and do and how to make every day of my few short decades on earth as meaningful as possible, so much so that it’s made me miserable. I think it’s time to chill out a bit and focus on my one main purpose, which is just being present for my kids. Thank you.
For every like I'll study for 1 hour
3 hours
Show proof before I like this comment :)
Get to work😊
We believe in you👏👏👏👏👏
🤘🏻
As a person who went through a psychosis episode due to psychedelics, I'm glad you talk about the dangers of those drugs. I have never suffered from any mental illness before that episode and I followed the majority saying that there is no risk at all with this kind of drugs and took them without awareness of what I was exposing myself. I spent months in psychiatric hospital and 4 years after this, I'm still suffering from post traumatic disorder from this episode. I follow now a spiritual path without any drugs and always get really upset by the number of people I meet on my way who promote drugs as a way to elevate yourself and "awake", it is dangerous and also a very consumerist and indulgent way of seeing drugs and spiritual awakening. Paying to take a magic pill to solve all your problems is not a sustainable solution, the only way to grow is to work on yourself and it is a constitent and sometimes uncomfortable work of a lifetime.
I journal, but it rhymes and I put it to music - songwriting is a cool way to journal!
I have to completely agree regarding saunas. The studies show dramatic drops in all cause death. And that's great, but a sauna feels like a fucking warm blanket, a superior hot tub. I bought a cheap Amazon sauna and it's amazing, lowered my blood pressure, and sleep better. Totally underrated and under used.
About 5 years ago I destroyed my journals from 1997 to 2018. I had decided that my sporadic heartbreak, outbursts of self-hatred and a year of intense gaslighting and emotional abuse by my husband would never be historically valuable enough to continue carrying around. And I must say that I do not regret that decision. Getting rid of those books freed me of a lot of emotions that kept dragging me back to regret and guilt and frustration.
This is a great tip 😊
"The second the goal stops being the optimal thing for you to do, that's when you quit, and set a new goal." As a neurodivergent person, very prone to "black and white"/"All or nothing" thinking, the idea that I can change my mind about, or give up on something I wanted, without it meaning I'm a "failure" and that "X goal is just one more thing I tried for and didn't get", is blowing my mind.
I agree. It's what I've been learning instinctively but it's so great to hear someone successful at life say it. 😊
Can you make a condensed version of these videos instead of podcast style? Miss your old ones
Yeah 😕
I think their answer to this is to chop up the interview into CZcams shorts
Bro, start your own channel then
No not everything should and can be bite sized always 😅 depth and attention are also very important
By cutting it down, they might have to take out good peices and valuable information all because people are impatient. Some people want both the details and the humor.
Keep these long form discussions coming!
never liked the idea of podcasts until he made one! he’s the only podcast i listen to
Underrated, walking my dogs everyday and watching their joy, getting exercise and fresh air and natural vitamin D and enjoying nature, having some lovely interactions with other dog walkers in my community. Never take my phone with me, it’s my special time with my furry boys and I feel so great after that magic hour daily.
""you don't have to love every minute of your job" is such a powerful statement nowadays. I've seen a lot of people leave amazing jobs for minutiae, then regretting it.
Thanks!
I'm watching this while forcing myself to get on the turbo trainer - it's only a 35 minute workout tonight, but this is me showing up for me
The perspective on self care was mind blowing. Self care is paying your bills exercising. I was stupid enough to think that once a while bed rotting will give me complete rest no it just made the next day working even harder
Thank you Mark !! I may be fat now, but I'm gonna keep on dancing 💃 myself back into shape !
Can't you just stand in a cold shower? I have a hard time with gratitude, and I found that it came down to language. When I think of gratitude, all I can hear in my head is "You should be grateful" and my brain associates it with "undeserving". It can often be used by parents in scolding. "You should be grateful for everything they and everyone on the plant has done for you." I understand that reveals my eff'd upness, but whatever. My word is thankful. Loved the conversation. Thank you!
You can just rephrase gratitude for another word like thankful or I am glad. I am blessed etc. The point is to actually try to think of why you are grateful what good does this thing give you.
You could be grateful about a pen because it helped you finish the assignment. Or a book because it helps you study your course.
Your eyes which can see the material and allow you to see the world and it's colours.
You can be grateful or consciousness itself because it allows you to experience the vast diversity of life.
The point is writing these things down does boost your mood provided that you put some thought into why you are grateful.
The first couple of therapists i had were very into patient led practices. Which I found myself going blank before the end of the session. I would stress out and try to remember what to talk about or try to write it down. Did not get very far with them. My therapist I really liked, would just ask simple hows "blank" and we would just conversate and I would end up realizing and remembering things throughout the session. I loved going to her even though I would cry a lot. She was still calm. When my goals we talked in the beginning about were satisfied. I ended my time with her, cause I know how to find help and I believe in myself unlike before.
I love when Mark makes education so fun
YES !!
Confession time,every time that I get way too into myself or my feelings or start thinking a certain way. All I have to do is listen to you and it's like that friend who always makes you accountable. Who tells you the truth and says the hard things. I hear my own words of desperation come out of your mouth So clear and confident.
Thank you.
I've been taking cold showers every morning, and it's helped me get ready for the day ahead. Thought about getting a proper cold plunge system but I think I'll stick to the 🚿 and avoid all the maintenance!
Mark Manson's fresh take on personal development practices is a valuable reminder that personal growth is not one-size-fits-all. It’s important to tailor self-care and goal-setting to fit your unique lifestyle and values, rather than blindly following popular trends. 👍
Dance goes back to our first forms of civilization and early tribes. It is natural for it to affect our brains because our brains probably feel innate motivation to move to rhythmic beats. It’s not surprising that dance is at the top of the list, I sometimes feel as if it could be as natural to us as sex and community. 💃🕺
As a therapist, I've gotta give you so much credit for breaking down the complexity of what good therapy looks like, & how bad therapy can make things worse. Yes, please, see multiple therapists before you center on one, & be honest about it. You're not going to hurt our feelings by telling us we're not the one for you! Also, one of the other complexities affecting people (at least here in the US) is the problem of accessing mental health treatment. So many people are unable to get good therapy because of low income, bad insurance/no insurance at all, low population-density areas with bad mental health infrastructure etc. I know you don't like to get political, Mark, but I'm gonna encourage people to vote for public officials at the local & federal level who are serious about increasing funding for increased access to mental health services. They're not gonna give it to you unless you tell them how upset you are about not getting it.
Love this channel! Made me laugh a lot, and laughter is good health! Laughter is underrated. 😊Thank you for a great channel!
Your quote friendship and role or the importance that they play in one’s life is absolutely spot on. I would add that being ‘with’ them ultimately requires little to no real effort, AND that you’re still ‘with’ them even if/when you’re not literally ‘with’ them. IOW - these friends are the people in your life whom you can hang out and/or speak to once a day, once a week, once a month, once a year, etc., and yet it’s always cool, and never weird, awkward or uncomfortable. When I encounter & connect with these people, I marvel….and I take heed. TBH, it always requires a genuine investment of time & effort to truly get to know someone. However, there is usually this inflection point, whereby it becomes fluid and organic and natural. IOW - it simply happens. Too, it is both reciprocal & mutually rewarding and beneficial. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become far more self aware and equally grateful of how unique and rewarding these particular friendships are, and the crucial role that they play in creating and living a life of purpose, fulfillment and yes, happiness. XOXO
I live in Reno NV which has 4 season but nothing too crazy. Maybe a little hotter than I’d like in the summer but winters are pretty mild in my opinion (granted, I’m from southern Maine so my opinion might be considered moot). For cold exposure I tell people to not wear too many layers during the winter time. Just wear a thick hoodie over your tee shirt and cozy socks and pants. Don’t constantly keep your apartment or house at a perfect 70 all day everyday and you will naturally get a healthy amount of cold exposure. We spend most of our time indoors under insulated roofs and walls. You’re gonna be warm enough. You’re not gonna die. Boom, there’s your cold exposure without having to spend a cent.
This was insightful. Made me think. Loved it.
You should move to Canada, you can just do a cold plunge in a nearby lake lol
Overated: Goals, Romance, Politics, Cold-Plunges
Underated: Friendship, Dancing, Music, Saunas, God
Depends: Self-care, Therapy, Purpose, Journalling, Psychedelics, Gratitude
Good afternoon. Thank you Mark for everything you do. I put myself on a self help binge last year. A lot of your videos with meditation. My life turned around. I have doubled my salary live on my own and may get a promotion tonight.
Ny baby and wife are happy and healthy. Life is good.
Top notch, as always! And thanks for bringing back the poop pillow LOL
For cold plunges, you need at least 11 and 1/2 minutes per week for there to show any benefit. It also increases the number of brown adipose tissue (fat cells) which are good fat cells. They specifically work to warm you up when you're cold, among other things. Stress also gets reduced quite a bit with cold plunging. It reduces the release of cortisol (stress hormone) in the short term and can make you more resilient to stressful conditions in the long run. Don't get this confused with cryotherapy, however, because it shows little to no evidence-based benefit and is extremely expensive (what do you mean you have to do like 30 minutes of cleaning for the cold plunge containers. You can literally just take cold showers and that'll probably add up to the beneficial time, and if you don't like that, just fill your bathtub up with cold water and add a bit of ice to keep it cold. No cleaning required. Now, I'm not a medical professional, but I I am a medical/health fanatic and I always encourage you to double-check the information you read anyway (especially online).
Self- care is having boundaries and not accepting abuse from others in any form. One of the best ways to have self-care in an abusive situation is to simply quietly walk away, block, delete. No drama. ( if possible of course)
And we just need to ask ourselves "is this self-care or self-indulgence? And self-discipline IS self-care. Mark is wise. Love this podcast. 🩷
I really enjoy the stuff that you guys share and the way you guys discuss and present. Big fan of you Mark Manson!
Dancing is my ONLY drug of choice... it's social, it's exercise, it is amazing. Do swing dancing, tango, salsa, blues, fusion, hip hop, there are so many good types of dancing. Find the one that works for you!
I’d rather doing nothing else but dance! I’m 70 and still go out dancing! I love doing my own thing and still get people coming up to me saying how much they love watching me dance! 🤯
A day of bed rotting is amazing and resets my energy if ive had a particularly tough week or month. After moving, a heavy project at work, a lot of back to back birthdays/events etc. theres def care and health to rest and sometimes a whole day of rest
Exactly! If you have a heavy work load it can be super helpful!
one day of "bed rotting" i wouldn't call bed rotting lol
This is awesome, I got alot of value out of this. I like this format, great breakdown.
Gratitude is useful so you don’t take your wins for granted, it helps me to continue and focus on positive behaviour that got me to win in the first place.
@immarkmanson I would love to change your opinion on microdosing. I can't speak to psychedelics yet but I'm a cannabis educator and I believe that microdosing can be a life changing practice for some people. The plant chemicals in cannabis work at a different physiological level than pharmaceutical drugs so microdosing is the best way to supplement what is already happening in the body and brain without overwhelming our body's natural ecosystem. The overwhelming high we associate with natural medicine exists because generally humans are using or abusing it in higher doses than we need to experience the benefits. As you said several times, not everything works for everyone all the time, but I couldn't to hear you dismiss what I consider to be a valuable tool for mental health without chiming in.
Friday night was Disco night in our house during Covid lockdown - it definitely got me through!
Mark! I have the subtle art journal. I love it. I need to write in it more. But wanted to say - thank you for creating that journal. It is incredibly useful to me. As a single parent i often keep a lot in my head so this has been a tool for me in unpacking everything.
Mark you keep give us a very good material very good. Thanks ❤
This was great! I’m old in age but new to your work. I’m enjoying finding your thoughts on this channel and in your writing. A sense of purpose is overrated…. COVID shutdown taught me how unnecessary I am to the world. A great forced social experiment.
Thank you for the honesty. The kick in the butt I needed, instead of the talking points people think you need.
Different perspective on the selfcare part: i am worth it, thats why i am taking care of myself. Good habits form from self love. You cant discipline yourself into loving yourself.
Having discipline is self-respect for your time and such. Disciplining yourself is definitely a dark path, as you suggest. Being objective and doing a little better next time is a better approach.
Best self improvement experience, get really high, and watch adaptation starring Nick Cage twice. I had a connection with my future wife, whom I haven't met yet. Would 100% recommend
As a family medicine physician, I can honestly say that mental disease is completely mistreated, under-diagnosed, and stigmatized with the current medical system in place.
Just the thought of using Will Ferrell as overrated was going to have me stick around the full hour
Much of it I agree with especially you can’t dance and be unhappy. Leaving Las Vegas sucks IMHO. Loved Con Air and Raising Arizona. One of my favorites is The Weatherman but almost no one has seen it 😅
In a world filled with crazy, this chanel always makes me feel down to earth and inspired to keep up with discipline even if its not fancy every day. Thanks for sharing ❤
I just recently was able to listen to a part of your Subtle Art audiobook, and NOW I am hooked on your videos. This stuff is GREAT. This is about being the best YOU for YOUR sake, not others.
I remember hearing that orienteering is better for you than running the equivalent distance on a treadmill, and the explanation was because it's combining both physical and mental attributes. It may be the case that dancing is similar, particularly if you're actually learning a routine, rather than just dancing randomly.
Interesting video. When it comes to self care for me massage is definitely self care. But I say that as someone who gets very tight and knotted back and neck muscles. In an ideal world I’d have one at least once a week but due to price that’s an impossible dream. When I was part time and would have a day off in the week I’d have one every fortnight with a local college that run its own beauty and therapy centre. All students just learning but about the fraction of the price. But now I’m full time. I need to start making the time to book a massage at least once a month them…. I’m currently sat here with my right shoulder and neck aching. (Maybe I should add I do have a connection tissue disorder)
Great takeway that nothing works all the time and being able to adapt to situations is the triumphant play style.
thank you for saying that about therapists. I feel like I have gotten more healing and positive "therapy" from your podcast/ and others on CZcams than I have ever gotten from any therapist I have been to.
Therapist quality: A significant amount of the therapists enrolled into psychology because they were already broken in the first place, in an attempt to fix themselves. They needed Therapy, and not a therapist profession
Mark: if you’re sad 😞… just dance! 🕺 😊
Good habits trounce goals in almost every way.
Nic Cage is in some great movies lately to be fair: Pig, Dream scenario, Longlegs, Renfield, ... The list goes on and on. He's such an underrated actor at this point.
Wow! Very insightful. I think the biggest challenge with gratitude is not to expect it from others.
“If you want to depress yourself start a drug problem and start watching the news” yeah 💯 truth
Half of my colleagues were watching 24/7 tracking of COVID deaths smoking weed daily during their lockdown.
This is so great and hilarious and helpful 👏
ive been to more than 13 psychologists and more than 9 psychiatrists i lost count after that i was 14 when i had that count, i went to at least ten more after the age of 14, my therapy started at 6, my first one for kids was great but she retired when i was 9, i went to therapy till i was 20 im 24 now and at 20 i gave up i just gave up out of all of them there were only two, TWO who actually helped me a bit and even then it was just a bit. at 23 due to my husbands recommendation i went and got tested for autism, turned out i had ADHD and it runs in the family, huge shock but that was the breakthrough i needed, no i discarded all my knowledge on therapy and learned about ADHD, now i started to self therapise myself and in just one year i have made such HUGE progress, MORE progress than in all the almost 15 years of therapy combined and im still going strong, learning more, teaching myself more and forgiving myself if i have a bad day, i didnt choose to have ADHD so i will no longer beat myself up for not being normal, because im not, best thing ive ever done for my mental health
I’ve seen some people just place their face in a deep bowl of cold water and just submerge their face gently. Less clean up! The person said it’s to wake the vagus nerve I believe that’s what the cold plunges are trying to do, maybe it’s less stressful but just as effective to only submerge the face?
Yeah maybe. Splashing water on your face in the morning is pretty refreshing if nothing else.
I do this, but its not a regular thing. Ill fill the sink halfway with water and half ice. I'll stick my head in as far as I can and hold it there until I can't stand it anymore, and then repeat several times with short breaks in between. I don't think it has any physiological benefits, but I believe "embracing the suck" (doing things that absolutely suck on occasion, by choice) can have positive mental health, or at least mental resiliance benefits.
Awesomely done✅ thank you.
27:25 Very true! Drugs are bad if you start a HABIT of using, trust me I KNOW from experience and now am finally of them
Really enjoyed this episode. Thank you for your effort 🙏🏻
About gratitude, they say it helps to really consider how those things you are grateful for, came to be
friendship is indeed underrated. friendships are so important and Nicholas Cage is a unique actor.....leaving las vegas awesome performance
Read a couple of your books. As a fellow atheist, I found your views on the potential benefits of organized religion on longevity and even mental health fascinating. I like being challenged to think objectively. These ideas are more complicated than "Right and Wrong". Now I'm going to have to watch "Leaving Las Vegas"!
Great and fun content! From a fan in brazil
Never watched your CZcams or listened to your podcast, but you had me at “I hope I don’t upset too many snowflakes…” 🤣
Self care is important, as a person with chronic pain, some days I just can't take care of myself all the time. Not being sad about it took some time, I needed to accept I have limitations.
This is my first time listening to this podcast or knowing anything about Mark. This guy gets it with a really balanced approach. Subscribed.
I heard someone I knew once say that she has not been lonlier ever since she was married. An unhealthy relationship with one particular person could be very isolating for some people.
Yes, self care for most of us is brushing our teeth and finding the energy to shower once a week. I used to bike to work everyday. But life circumstances prevail. I’m so not interested in romance and count myself fortunate to answer work emails by 10, maybe 11, every morning. I’m not an ER doc. No one will die. Re: friendship. There are those that need to be dumped. Yes. And those that are golden. The older we get, the better we know which is which. Re: therapy. Not my bag. I just felt anxiety before every session. And reverted every time after. I don’t know where I’ll go from here but… Dammit. Stop about the you get what you give. I get it. But it’s still improbable for most. FYI I dance a lot even when I’m not feeling great. I do it for myself but also for those around me.
Anyway, I could keep compounding my comments and go on forever but I will stop now and just listen 😊 Thank you Mark.
Totally agree with the therapy take. I was encouraged to attend therapy due to domestic violence, at first it was freeing to talk about it all. After 3 years I just thought why am I doing this? Stuck in sadness and past trauma. Done with therapy I’m responsible for my healing x
I think as you get older and especially if you have a family ...keeping self care goals really simple is key - like talk to your partner and say you want 1 hour a day to go to gym/etc and vice versa - even just getting used to going for a jog or walk. As I got older I found gymns less and less appealing and throwing some runners on and jogging around the block more and more appealing. Gyms can make you feel inadequate if there are too many gym bros flexing
I've spent about 30 hours building a cold plunge. I have another 10hours to go lol. Honestly, building it has been underrated for happiness
Great episode!
Love your work as always. Thank you!!!!!!!!
Thank you for you video, a lot of common sense. Kind regards
Congrats on 2M subscribers
Haven't even seen the video yet just wanted to say a big thanks for writing your books Mark real life changing shit
Hey Mark - Could you put together a list of journal prompts you feel are super helpful? I've tried several over time and I've found 2 stand out. "what did you love today?" "What did you learn?" I know there's value in journaling. But Trying to find prompts that will actually help you self reflect in an effective manner is pretty difficult.
So, agian, could you share a list of the prompts you think are the most useful?
Not Mark, but I think there’s a subtle art of not giving a f*ck journal
Can I please tell you about my "cold plunges"? I go to a rushing river for a swim. Because I bathe naked I generally only go down there when it's raining, so there's less chance of being observed. This is even better when it's below ten degrees Celsius. So, in autumn and winter. Then you really have the place to yourself. Mostly I want a river or a waterfall. I once drove to Wim Hof's house in Poland, but he wasn't home. It was 28 December. I went to his river, got into the water, breaking ice with my feet. The water was below freezing. I was alone in Poland because I don't have any fucking friends. (who would want a friend like me for crying out loud). There were some passers by, so I wore a bathing suit. A random man took photos of me with my phone. I was in for more than five minutes and only when I got out did I realise that I was just in time. Just before passing out I was able to move to my vehicle, about 100 meters away, get in, and start the engine with the heater on. And it isn't even the craziest thing I've done. I'm not sure who I am, but I'm going to write a graphic novel about all the shit I did. Traveling alone thru Africa, everything. I really suffered not having friends, so I kept myself busy.
But, I'm digressing. Ice plunges are VERY good for your body. Read up on Universiteit Radboud, Who copied Wim Hof's method. Your pulmonary system takes the strain off of the heart, making your heart last longer...
Of course you don't like your ice bath at home. It's not living, moving water. Find some wild water. I really enjoy your videos.