Understanding Tao Xu: Heartstopper Character Deep-Dive
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- čas přidán 6. 12. 2022
- Today we're talking all about Mr. Tao Xu and why he does the interesting and sometimes questionable things he does in season one of Heartstopper. Also, stick around to the end for some chaos, some Darla, and the long-awaited (?) reveal of my exact height. :P
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Tbh Tao is a great friend. He was the one Charlie cried to when he was hurt. Pple say they want loyal friends but what they actually want is placeholder friends until they get a romantic partner and then they use their friends to cry about their relationship.
“Tao deep dive” Aka “ In Defense of Tao Xu”
I have a small theory that when Tao says, “No, I’m going to stay angry at him a little bit longer” he is starting to realize that he maybe took it too far, but it’s too late now and he still needs time to process everything fully.
I'd like to point out that Tao had a legitimately bad direct experience with Nick when the rugby lads threw a ball at his head unprovoked and they all laughed (I know Nick didn't, but it would be hard to distinguish in the moment). Nick comes up to him and asks 'you ok?" but then immediately follows it up with "can I have the ball back?" so yeah, that's gonna come off as mocking, not genuine concern. I would be so heated.
Also, at the arcade, he tells Nick, "you're messing with [Charlie]" and Nick says, "Yeah. You're right." So confirmation from the horse's mouth that Nick is just stringing Charlie along.
Tao's perspective: The friendship group is falling apart...because of an unrequited crush...on an asshole.
Also, also I do think Charlie was kind of a shitty friend. He totally got swept away in his relationship with Nick and put his friends on the back burner. He says as much in episode 8 when he and Tao apologize to each other: "I should have been a better friend. I've been kind of distracted by Nick". Charlie and Nick see each other in form twice a day. They go over to each other's houses after school. Did they really need to sneak off to lunch together? Charlie couldn't at least keep up the friend group lunch routine if they are not hanging out after school as much or have Nick join the crew sometimes? Charlie knows how important the friendship group is to Tao and how hard he's taking Elle being gone, he could have made more of an effort.
To quote Tao: "THANK you!"
It's so good to see empathy and understanding for Tao. Sometimes it seemed like people couldn't see past his hair. Maybe that's the point of the hair, who knows.
PS I think he is in drama class in the comics and did a school play in the show. I don't know if that qualifies as extracurricular or a big part of his life.
Really loved this and agreed with everything you said. I will add a few thoughts of my own. Firstly we hear nothing of Tao's dad, ( does this add to abandonment issues?), also can we applaud Tao's Mum who obviously has a great attitude to the queer community and has given Tao some excellent values. I would also add that everyone has an impression of Nick that he is a very straight rugby lad and we know that Nick gives that impression to everyone even if it is a front because his mum says that Nick acts more the person she sees at home, ( the 16 yr old boy who is happy to watch Mamma Mia with his mum 4 times in six months which I bet his friend group have no idea about), around Charlie than his other friends. So no one sees the side of Nick that Charlie does, so there is no reason for Tao to trust him and there are a number of points which re enforce Tao's opinion, ( the rugby ball incident where Tao lumps Nick in with the rest of them and why wouldn't he or the bit where he looks back after a Harry incident and Nick and Imogen look thick as thieves). The 'It's all your fault' incident was painful but I understood that in the heat of the moment, when he is hurting so much, a fifteen yr old may well lash out, ( I have seen a number of adult reactors really angry at Tao for saying that but I think they are putting far too much of their adult perspective on a 15 yr old who in every other way is a very special friend and ally). I think Tao is a very special young man and I can't wait to see more of him.
Will Gao did a great job with this character.
I am intrigued by a Nick-Tao relationship as well. They are each “stars” in their respective friend groups, and both big-time Charlie fans. Charlie’s group seems to be able to accommodate “big” personalities, i.e. Tao, Elle and even Charlie himself. Alice Osman writes wonderful friend relationships, so maybe a Tao-Nick one can have traction. I do appreciate the Nick-Tara friendship as well. She and Darcy are as instrumental as Charlie in being there for Nicks journey, answering his questions and supporting him at every turn. When my own psyche steps back from a Nick and Charlie focus, I can really appreciate Alice’s lovely job of character development. Thanks for this Tao-centric feature!
Great video! A small scene that really shows us the difference between what Charlie sees and what Tao sees is when Nick and Imogen are standing together outside the school. When Charlie looks over at Nick, Nick looks back at Charlie and smiles, but then when Tao looks over at Nick he and Imogen are standing really close with their heads together and it looks really intimate. If I was Tao and saw that I would think the worst too. This show is so good at the little details! Also I had to laugh when you talked about your height because I do the exact same thing: I’m 5’2” and 3/4 so I round up to 5’3” 😂
I don’t think Tao made many mistakes. It’s just he wasn’t trusted to be let in on everything that was going on, so he did the best he could with the intel he had. Yes, the ‘this is all your fault’ comment was harsh, but in a way it was partly Charlie’s fault that Harry was picking on Tao. If Tao had known that Charlie was actually dating Nick, and they sat down and said we don’t want to draw attention to Nick because he’s not ready to come out yet, I think Tao would have respected it. Bottom line, Charlie should have told Tao once he knew Nick was okay with Tao knowing. But these are all teens… people need to give them all a pass for not making perfect decisions.
I think your analysis is spot on. Tao does the best he can with the information he has at the time. He's always looking out for his friends, although he has his flaws.
I can't wait to see how his character develops in season 2 when he realizes that Charlie being with Nick isn't going to destroy their friend group. And when he figures out that Elle hid her feelings from him after he made her promise their friendship would never change. Will he have regrets?
There's a lot of growing for him to do.
Ps. That tornado siren is terrifying! You don't seem too fazed though 😅
Pps. I was so close! I guessed you were 5'5''. The mystery is finally solved.
I've never had another character that reminds me of myself as much as Tao does. He is so special to me. He is a bit scarily accurate to how I was as a teenager with (at the time undiagnosed) BPD. (I was worse though.) I feel like I talk about this too much and I'm not comfortable "diagnosing" fictional characters but he's just so incredibly relatable to me. I feel like I understand him 100%. I know he's not supposed to be representation for me in that way but he's so comforting to me because he's such a good person despite his issues. He's definitely the love-him-or-hate-him type but I find so much comfort in seeing so much of myself in a character lots of people love and are willing to understand. I would be beyond thrilled to have him as a friend. He cares so much.
Also I feel like everyone who's so baffled by Tao's hair has never gone to art school. I swear half of the people in all of my art classes had something like that going on. Like in my experience there's always people like the guy with the tiny hat, the girl who wears a scarf on her leg every day, the girl with 2 belts, the girl who wears grandma clothes, the guy who refuses to wear shoes or socks, me with my ridiculous makeup and... a beanie. Oh. I guess I was also the beanie person? 😅
YES. as an autistic teenager who, similarly, cares about my friends more than anything else, tao really reminds me of myself. he clearly has unaddressed problems with abandonment and is working with the information he has and the things that he prioritizes. i would die for him!
Hi Thom, I have always felt that Tao's character adds an essential touch of realism, making an essential contrast to all the others in the show. Your analysis is terrific. You said everything I was thinking and much more. Thanks so much for this video. So glad to hear your sense of smell and taste have returned! This is a very good sign of recovery.
For me, Tao was the most interesting character of the group. I appreciate that some of the conflict comes from him making grey (but understandable) decisions rather than having bad things happen to him (like for Charlie, Elle, Tara and arguably Nick). As others have said, his father’s absence may play a part in his character, but I feel Tao’s heritage should also play into this - I doubt that the rugby lads are allies to poc, and it would add a layer to his and Elle’s relationship.
I kind of hope there’s a deeper delve into Issac’s connection to the group. Even for someone with no focus or plotline, I feel like Issac was especially detached (I get not wanting to be involved in drama but he doesn’t seem have any thoughts on the group as a whole which... idk how I feel about that).
Off topic but I, as a 59 yr old only came later to Heartstopper and it had a profound affect on me so it is nice to have discovered your channel and to engage on it. One of the things I loved about the series was the music( none of which i was familiar with as an old fart). Then I thought about the power of music and songs and singers that have meant something to myself over the years so I put a Heartstopper inspired playlist together. ( Not something that I had done before and I wish I had the skills to do more with it but there you are) which i hope is not to presumptuous to share.
Each song kind of goes with a scene in my head. 1. They say Hi for the first time. 2 Nick grabs Charlie's hand. 3. Charlie talks about ben to Mr Ajayi. 4. Tara speaks to Elle for the first time. 5. Tao tells Charlie that Nick loves Tara. 6. The friend group hug 7. Nick at Charlie's house. 8. The Kiss. 9. Charlie comforts Nick at his house post kiss. 10. Nick hugs Charlie after overhearing in the bathroom. ( though any Nick hug really) 11. Charlie and Nick at the claw machine post declarations of like. 12. Tara and Darcy kiss in the music room. 13. Harry the bully's song. 14. The horrible split screen when Nick is reaching out to Charlie over instagram. 15. Nicks song in the corridor when he has taken Charlie there from the sports day. 16 Charlie's song at the same moment. 17. The Kiss in the corridor. 18. Nick comes out to mum and the montage. 19 They lie on the beach together at the end.
czcams.com/play/PL1nP3yxP3minESg8hsWvWpPmYq3gr_28d.html.
Oh, I love this!
@@snoopy_J Thank you.:)
THANK YOU!!!!!! Tao is so misunderstood by so many fans. You and I are on the same page.
Thom is wise and mature beyond his tears. Thanks for the analysis.
Your videos pick out so many of the same little things I notice.
I wasn't going to comment but now you've pointed out that NICK was the one who came out to everyone in the group, I was so close to just screaming "YES! THAT!"
Then I decided that I wanted you to know that I appreciate your analyses.
(I will still say though that (most of) the Tao portions are the only parts I still have to skip through and not deal with. As much as he likes to think he's protecting and thinking of others, he only views things through a self-centered lens -- his friend group, his feelings. I'm hoping Tao will be a lot better in future seasons.)
I think it would be great if you did a focused look at Elle, too!
I hope you decide to do this for all the characters!
Excellent insights all, but one thing you didn't mention, one thing many defenders and detractors don't mention or gloss over, what in my mind is the paramount point: Tao is 14 years old. Perhaps our perceptions are clouded by Nick in particular having the emotional maturity of a man in his 20s or 30s, but the greatest variation in emotional maturity amongst males is between the ages of say 13 and 25. And that's just the average experience, not taking into account extreme variations in family dynamics. I was 24 when I met my first Nick and came out and it was only through that 8 year relationship that I discovered how emotionally stunted I was, and years of therapy to understand how much emotionally invasive and abusive parenting (and extreme parental conservatism) had radically shaped my emotional maturation. Like you said, this is not to defend Tao's behavior, rather to temper extremes of reaction. Being an emotional fuck up at 14 is likely the rule, not the exception. While ham-handedness shouldn't be excused or dismissed, it should at least be expected at 14.
Happy day - Heartstopper video from you plus Darla appearances! 😻
I appreciate your Tau insights and am also looking forward to seeing what they do with his and Nick's relationship in season 2. And of course him and Elle kissing in the museum.
I forget what I guessed about your height, but am totally on board for rounding up. I'm 5'4&1/2" but always say I'm 5'5".
I love Tao. He's the funniest character. He is very emotion driven (with Elle being the voice of reason bringing him back) but I think your analysis was spot on. I note that when Charlie and Nick had lunch in the art room Nick asked if Charlie's friends would mind and Charlie replied, 'No, they can deal with it...'.
Excellent analysis, think I might have been less than generous to him, you have forced me to reevaluate certain aspects of Tao.
Thom you make a great case for Tao's questionable behavior in season one. Good analysis.
When I think of Tao I'm always torn between the protective "big brother", the a little jealous friend and the one who hurts Charlie because he's hurt. I try to understand him while not being too angry with him 😉
I wanted to add a point that seems important to me in the development of this character and which is well summarised by the sentence of Mr Spring himself: "Bisexual people exist". As we have seen with what happened to Kit Connor, today's society (including sometimes LGBTQIA+ peoples) still tends to deny the validity of bisexuality and only see life in 2 "colours" : straight or gay. And Tao shares a bit of this pattern at first convinced that Nick is straight by his rugbymen physique 🙄 and by the fact that he has only "dated" girls (Tara, Imogen). So because of this he has trouble grasping that Nick is not making fun of Charlie. But fortunately Tao, who is a good and open-minded person, overcomes all these prejudices and preconceptions. And for that I love him sm. Tao best friend. 😍
I definitely have more empathy towards Tao now, great to see things from his perspective.
We see so much openness and understanding between the couples in this show; there's great communication and honesty. But the truest thing said in the entire series is Tao's, "I made it so hard for you to tell me." I think it's easy to forgive his foibles when we admit he's the most honest main character of the show.
So much of Tao's behavior comes from a place of the best intentions, and I actually side with him in terms of fighting back against bullies. Way too much media pushes the "ignore it and it goes away" philosophy that not only is harmful for victims of bullying, but doesn't actually work, so good on Tao for his witty comebacks and for retrieving his property from Harry as he should. Also Tao was the target of the bullying too! It's actually very unfair of Charlie to ask Tao to hold back on his response to his own bullying.
But if there's one gripe I have with Tao, it's something a lot of straight cis people do even when they're your bestest best friend and a Supreme Gold Star Ally: reinforce shame and repression. Nothing will shift my trust of a straight person more than their unsolicited opinion on any guy I might glance at for more than 2 seconds and the dreaded "He's definitely straight tho :(." Didn't ask! And all of Charlie's friends are guilty of this. Nearly everyone gets crushes. Nearly everyone should be able to experience and express those kind of feelings, it isn't fair that Charlie gets put in the corner with a dunce hat and told he should know better than to even hope or dream. You know who didn't do that to Charlie, besides Darcy and Tara (since they got to know him after Charlie and Nick started really hanging out)? His sweet sweet sister.
I would love to see an updated video of this video covering how you look at Tao after season 2
I feel like people forgot that Tao grew out his hair too show solidarity too Elle when the school complained about her hair length
So, I'm not sure this is a case of it being forgotten so much as that being not a confirmed thing but rather a fan theory that gained traction due to repetition (at least as far as I am aware??). Though of course, if there is evidence somewhere of Alice or someone confirming this, let me know! But as far as I know, this is more something that fans theorized and which makes sense rather than a confirmed fact of the show canon.
Tao Xu's fear of being alone makes him cross the line, mainly when he feels he's not in control of every1's friendship.
Also, whenever he can, he snoops into people's lives. This is not good at all. But, I must say he's an amazing friend, mainly for Charlie, because he does everything he can to protect him.
Does he overdo it? Yeah. But, that's his way to show love, care and affection.
I spot The Raven Boys over there 👀
Ok one last comment. I am a Tao defender for the most part only because his actions in the context of what he knew and witnessed make perfect sense, and he was being dragged around and kept out of the loop. HOWEVER. I have warned my friends that if I ever disappear into a relationship, I don't want to hear a gd thing from them. Not a THING. That is payback for all the straight nonsense.