Why Most Men Fail To Attract A Quality Woman - Dr Robert Glover

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  • čas přidán 29. 06. 2024
  • Dr Robert Glover is a therapist, coach and an author.
    We’re frequently told to be less selfish in life, whether it’s in love, work, or personal matters. But what if prioritising your own needs is actually the key to unlocking a better life?
    Expect to learn how you can make your needs a priority, ways you can learn to be authentic, how men can learn to have more self compassion, what men often don’t understand about female attraction, the problem with needing approval from anyone outside of yourself, Robert’s advice for staying out of the friendzone, best tips to date after a divorce and much more...
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    00:00 Believe Your Needs Are Important
    08:40 How to Make Your Needs a Priority
    18:22 Rewriting Deeply-Set Patterns
    26:05 Preventing a Critical Inner Voice
    35:43 Believing the Story You Tell Yourself
    45:13 Men Need to Step Outside of the Cycle
    55:25 Having a Puritan View of Hard Work
    1:03:10 The Cause of Nice Guy Syndrome
    1:09:07 What it Really Means to Be an Alpha
    1:21:29 Do Women Need to Be More Receptive?
    1:36:41 How to Successfully Use Online Dating
    1:47:55 Dating After Breaking Up or Divorcing
    1:54:40 The Downsides of a Casual Sex Culture
    1:58:17 Where to Find Dr Glover
    -
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Komentáře • 416

  • @ChrisWillx
    @ChrisWillx  Před 29 dny +19

    Hello you savages. Get access to every episode 10 hours before CZcams by subscribing for free on Spotify - spoti.fi/2LSimPn or Apple Podcasts - apple.co/2MNqIgw Here's the timestamps:
    00:00 Believe Your Needs Are Important
    08:40 How to Make Your Needs a Priority
    18:22 Rewriting Deeply-Set Patterns
    26:05 Preventing a Critical Inner Voice
    35:43 Believing the Story You Tell Yourself
    45:13 Men Need to Step Outside of the Cycle
    55:25 Having a Puritan View of Hard Work
    1:03:10 The Cause of Nice Guy Syndrome
    1:09:07 What it Really Means to Be an Alpha
    1:21:29 Do Women Need to Be More Receptive?
    1:36:41 How to Successfully Use Online Dating
    1:47:55 Dating After Breaking Up or Divorcing
    1:54:40 The Downsides of a Casual Sex Culture
    1:58:17 Where to Find Dr Glover

  • @Redranddd
    @Redranddd Před 28 dny +338

    I get here because the thumbnail says "stop dating your mum" I stay because of a guy that looks like the villain of 'cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2'

  • @BGFitnessNY
    @BGFitnessNY Před 27 dny +63

    I was a client of Dr. Glover in the late 2000’s. I met my wife a year after working with him.

  • @peacepeople10
    @peacepeople10 Před 27 dny +160

    As a man I've always attracted more women minding my own business. I don't even approach women anymore. Advice I have for younger guys. Don't watch porn or look at hot women on twitch/youtube. Life changing advice

    • @wojiaobill
      @wojiaobill Před 26 dny +5

      Nobody should ever stop watching porn

    • @darint9686
      @darint9686 Před 26 dny +3

      @@wojiaobill why do you believe that?

    • @chiquinho_do_progresso
      @chiquinho_do_progresso Před 25 dny +19

      ​@@wojiaobill who let bro cook?

    • @syressx9098
      @syressx9098 Před 23 dny

      @@wojiaobill Get him out of the kitchen

    • @mrbritisher9748
      @mrbritisher9748 Před 22 dny +8

      Women don't approach men though in 90% of cases so if you don't do anything as a guy won't get anything pretty simple equation, don't care how attractive a guy is he still has to make the moves most women will do is smile & make themselves available rest is up to guys, & let's be honest any woman that's making herself super available for a guy isn't the most sought after women most guys want it's 5's 6's or worse.

  • @TheNiceGuyShow
    @TheNiceGuyShow Před 27 dny +41

    This man has changed so many lives and is on point. If you get triggered, it highlights what you need to work on.

    • @norbucso
      @norbucso Před 21 dnem +1

      A father should have done this for each child. We wouldnt need men like him to teach us if it would work naturally.

  • @kalmkoala9243
    @kalmkoala9243 Před 28 dny +153

    As a former nice guy. You gotta be direct as possible. Do not beat around the bush. Be clear with what you desire. The more clear you are, the more likely you are to attract what you're looking for. Self-fulfilling prophecies can be both positive and negative.
    Edit: You have to tell people what you want. If they give it to you, great. If they don't, that's also great. You just have to move on. Be direct, if they don't respond how you'd like, be respectful, and move on. It's not a bad thing to move on from someone when they cannot give what you want.

    • @DD-xw6uw
      @DD-xw6uw Před 28 dny +9

      I’ve found this to be true. It filters out the people who are not compatible with yourself. Essentially dating wise, if you’re upfront and say “I want this”

    • @Savvynomad225
      @Savvynomad225 Před 28 dny +8

      I want freedom from work and bills and problems. Who can I tell that to and make it be?

    • @papertiger9845
      @papertiger9845 Před 28 dny +1

      Exactly. And if they say theyre one way and act another, just tell them and break it off and move on. As a man, theyll always respect that over being their doormat

    • @janosd4nuke
      @janosd4nuke Před 28 dny +3

      ​@@Savvynomad225the guy in the mirror. Then you figure out better problems that offer more lasting solutions than the wageslave rat race. Then with your actionable steps you scale up and start looking for running mates, be it a romantic or a business partner.
      You can never escape problems, besides life would be boring and meaningless without challenges. But you can figure out how to pivot to have better problems.

    • @Savvynomad225
      @Savvynomad225 Před 28 dny +1

      @@janosd4nuke are taxes part of the “better problems” list?

  • @thesoulhash
    @thesoulhash Před 26 dny +20

    I have loved iyanla vanzant's quote for years. "My cup runneth over. What's in the cup is for me, and what runs over I have to give to everyone else."

  • @SantiagoA.Wright
    @SantiagoA.Wright Před 26 dny +241

    This is a great Video. This brings back painful memories which i have been enduring. My relationship of 5 years ended 3 months ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.

    • @RoyJ.Tillison-tq5ed
      @RoyJ.Tillison-tq5ed Před 26 dny +4

      I am sorry about what you have been through. I have been through something similar and was almost depressed, till I contacted a spiritual counsellor who helped me get my ex back and hence my life back.

    • @SantiagoA.Wright
      @SantiagoA.Wright Před 26 dny +1

      Interesting. Who is this counsellor, and how do I meet the person?

    • @RoyJ.Tillison-tq5ed
      @RoyJ.Tillison-tq5ed Před 26 dny +2

      Online, you'll find shelly renee white, revered for her expertise as a spiritual counsellor. She has the ability to reunite couples and promote holistic well-being.

    • @SantiagoA.Wright
      @SantiagoA.Wright Před 26 dny +3

      Thanks a lot. I just did. Impressive.

    • @grannyannie2948
      @grannyannie2948 Před 26 dny +3

      You may not want advice from women. But I was in your place when I was 21. There was no internet then. I wrote down why I loved him. And what was wrong, why we didn't stay together. And I kid you not within a month I met the perfect man, and we have both been happy together (except when we were sad. Happy ever after is a joke. Friends and family still die) for nearly 40 years.

  • @AreteTrading
    @AreteTrading Před 14 dny +5

    The quote is:
    "How long are you going to wait before you demand the best for yourself and in no instance bypass the discriminations of reason?
    - Epictetus
    Great podcast.

  • @tomcoop9750
    @tomcoop9750 Před 28 dny +93

    After working on my career, building muscle in the gym, and becoming more confident- I started attracting great women. I’ve been in 2-5 year long relationships.
    However, during the dating stages, about 40-50% of the women didn’t show up to dates on time. They had amazing personalities, but they didn’t seem to respect my time. Many other men have experienced this too. I blocked them and moved on because we can’t reward rude behavior.
    It’s hard to vet dating prospects before you meet them in person. The blame doesn’t solely fall on men- and the anti-male sentiments in the media haven’t helped. Men’s issues deserve to be addressed with the same urgency that women’s issues are addressed.

    • @leedlbagginshield8492
      @leedlbagginshield8492 Před 28 dny +2

      how late is late in your opinion?

    • @tomcoop9750
      @tomcoop9750 Před 28 dny

      @@leedlbagginshield8492 20 minutes to an hour without giving me any notice. I don’t mind them being late if they let me know they’re running late. Life happens.

    • @leedlbagginshield8492
      @leedlbagginshield8492 Před 28 dny +6

      @@tomcoop9750 ok that’s rude. I think 5-10 minutes are acceptable. I usually give a text when I know that I‘m gonna be a bit late. I live in Germany and we value being on time here

    • @debbiebartolo
      @debbiebartolo Před 28 dny +13

      I don’t know your age but find that’s not a acceptable. I guess certain women behave that way. Time is our most precious commodity and everyone should respect everyone’s time. Communication is so easy these days.

    • @Mr_Penguins_Pet_Human
      @Mr_Penguins_Pet_Human Před 28 dny +9

      The problem with dating Apps is they give you all the facts but nothing about the person, like if their respectful to be on time or of there's any chemistry between you.
      When you meet in person socially, your instinct will tell you what you need to know without a date
      Maybe it's a generation thing (I'm mid 40s) but I never dated. I met girls while out socially and if there was attraction either they asked me out or I them. When girls asked me it was for a one night thing. I only I asked two, 1 lasted 5 years, the other I married and been with for 25 years.

  • @FalcaoXTZ
    @FalcaoXTZ Před 28 dny +98

    One my favourite guests ever, his book changed my life

    • @Lynx_Mercury
      @Lynx_Mercury Před 28 dny

      You should check out integration Nation. It's a life changer

    • @unconventional_health
      @unconventional_health Před 28 dny +2

      calming voice

    • @Stilo95
      @Stilo95 Před 28 dny

      How did his book changed your life?

    • @alexheise110
      @alexheise110 Před 27 dny

      he wrote a book?

    • @roc-88
      @roc-88 Před 26 dny +4

      No more mr nice guy. You can listen to it on CZcams

  • @dianesalisbury2
    @dianesalisbury2 Před 27 dny +20

    In situations where I've dated men who openly tell me from the beginning that they just want "casual" Deep down I'm always telling myself or rather hoping... that although I heard him my brain say..."but once he gets to know me maybe that will change if we are great together" "He might fall in love with me if im amazing". My head and heart ALWAYS over rides the fact that he said... "I just want casual" With this last situationship that I kept saying yes to. It carried on and off for 3 and a half years. It's was a total waste of my time and heart and I've learned a HUGE leason from it. And I own big time that I kept saying "yes" to basically alot of sex with a small friendship and nothing deeper... it left me empty. I will, WILL NOT do that to me again.

    • @kimdavis5403
      @kimdavis5403 Před 27 dny +1

      Decenter men and develop self. You will bring peace and contentment into your life.

    • @grannyannie2948
      @grannyannie2948 Před 26 dny +4

      Long ago I knew a man like that. He was ten years older than I, and quite wealthy. He wined and dined me. He made me feel like a princess. And then he wouldn't phone for two days. He broke my heart.
      It was the 80s and we believed in listening to audio tapes. I bought one called Find Your Perfect Partner. It involved writing down what you wanted in a man and the type of relationship you wanted, I wanted marriage, a house and children. I kid you not within weeks I met my perfect man. And we've been married for nearly forty years.
      PS. This perfect partner stuff is so childish. No matter how wonderful your partner. Friends and family will die, economic times will change, children will fight with each other, etc etc

    • @polysaturated
      @polysaturated Před 25 dny +3

      It also seems sort of ass-backwards to have sex first and then attempt to connect on another level. Dating is really an odd artifice.

    • @trigcat3107
      @trigcat3107 Před 23 dny +1

      Females discovering traditional rules in modern times be like-

    • @ClaireGreen-wd2gm
      @ClaireGreen-wd2gm Před 14 dny +1

      I was about done with the idea of love so I did something casual with a man. I felt like I got attached but I was actually going through alot. (Being moms caregiver, her slowly dying, trying to figure out what to do with a too big run down house) and he was a distraction. Anyway he lied to me a lot and now years later he's calling me wanting me to give something real a chance and I'm so thoroughly done with men I haven't let one touch me in 3 years. I say all that to say he will likely regret treating you like you were one of many. They play with good women and then they end up with a bad woman who plays the game better than they do and they get beaten and wanna crawl back to you. Never let them

  • @adelb7897
    @adelb7897 Před 28 dny +22

    100% train yourself to be good at reading social cues and then you'll know how to observe the signs that a woman is interested in you. Don't give attention to women who don't value you or people in general. Actually this shouldn't just be about dating, it's about life. Obviously this doesn't mean get upset at people who show you signs that they dislike you, it just helps you to know who values you and ultimately who you want in your life.

  • @albertlevins9191
    @albertlevins9191 Před 28 dny +20

    Coming straight out with it.
    This episode is WAY better than I was expecting.
    Hugely information dense.
    Talking about how to think.
    This is the kind of content that I find useful.
    Will be rewatching this. Probably a lot of times.

  • @shakespearemonologue
    @shakespearemonologue Před 27 dny +9

    Love this guest - he comes across as so authentic- a breath of fresh air.

  • @mapsdot9223
    @mapsdot9223 Před 28 dny +39

    They get the Biblical maxim wrong too. It's not put yourself last, its 'love your neighbor as yourself ' if you don't love yourself, it will manifest as using other people as a surrogate for loving yourself a la the woman at the well. This ends well for no one.

  • @XfilerD
    @XfilerD Před 26 dny +14

    Chris: "I'm now back to the dating scene, which is scary and the whole new world for me". An athletic looking Brit with 2 million subscribers that has just moved to US is trying to sound humble :D

    • @stevecooper7883
      @stevecooper7883 Před 26 dny +2

      Honestly if he fails then we know society is done for 😅

    • @Gaspar40
      @Gaspar40 Před 25 dny +9

      Having lots of options is paradoxically harder than having few. If you can be with anyone then how do you choose to be with any one person in particular. Look at the dumpster fire celebrity marriages. Cheating, divorce, bitter legal battles - it’s nowhere near as cool as people think.

    • @dahliaherrod4301
      @dahliaherrod4301 Před 20 dny +9

      Different kind of hard. He's doing well for himself and has set a certain standard for his life. I can't imagine there are too many women who can come close to matching it and being a good complement for him. Plus he's gotta worry about gold diggers and groupies. Never fun.

    • @fs5775
      @fs5775 Před 14 dny +1

      immature bro energy, he thinks he's pulling off the humility successfully 🤣🤣

  • @v9b23j
    @v9b23j Před 28 dny +9

    When we approach women without being focused on our goal of securing a particular outcome, it's easier to build a connection with them. Even if the outcome wasn't what we hoped for, we built a connection with them and that's the joy of life.

  • @fishinforfun3359
    @fishinforfun3359 Před 28 dny +14

    The mindsets glover presents have legit changed my life. Great insight and podcast

  • @DTreatz
    @DTreatz Před 28 dny +13

    _Unwin also stated "In the past, too, the greatest energy has been displayed only by those societies which have reduced their sexual opportunity to a minimum by the adoption of absolute monogamy (para. 168). _*_In every case the women and children were reduced to the level of legal nonentities, sometimes also to the level of chattels, always to the level of mere appendages of the male estate._*_ Eventually they were freed from their disadvantages, but at the same time the sexual opportunity of the society was extended. Sexual desires could then be satisfied in a direct or perverted manner... _*_So the energy of the society decreased, and then disappeared."_*_ He points out that "No society has yet to succeeded in regulating the relations between the sexes in such a Way as to enable sexual opportunity to remain at a minimum for an extended period." - _*_and thus all societies have collapsed._*
    - J. D. Unwin, _Sex and Culture_ circa 1930s 💊

    • @amuroray9115
      @amuroray9115 Před 25 dny

      What is your solution to the men who cheat on their wives?

    • @matthewnorris203
      @matthewnorris203 Před 22 dny

      I agree with him.

    • @matthewnorris203
      @matthewnorris203 Před 22 dny

      @@amuroray9115You can accept that men want sexual variety and that’s simple male nature or divorce them. Do you see another option from your point of view?

    • @amuroray9115
      @amuroray9115 Před 22 dny

      @@matthewnorris203 then they shouldn’t get married. That way, they’re free to sleep around. Divorces are common though, so it looks like that’s already taken care of.

  • @user-wj3bn1yi8f
    @user-wj3bn1yi8f Před 28 dny +5

    Loved what he said about starting to give to yourself - the examples of buying something for himself once he bought for someone else was great because it's a conscious pattern he set up for himself. Love that.

  • @matthewnorris203
    @matthewnorris203 Před 22 dny

    Mr. Glover has helped me in soo many ways along with Coach Corey Wayne. I’m a stronger, clearer man because of their work. Thank you!

  • @PaigeSabedra
    @PaigeSabedra Před 25 dny +1

    What a fun guest, i enjoyed all his stories and lessons.I could listen for hours. Again, Communication is key for any relationship.

  • @smith899
    @smith899 Před 28 dny +55

    So, who are the “brothers” having sex with? 🙄 Is everyone having sex with the same woman so that when you finally grow up and get married, YOU can get a virgin?
    Yes, the hook-up culture is awful, but is awful for both sides, NOT just the women. It damages both men and women.

    • @billusher2265
      @billusher2265 Před 28 dny +9

      These comments are funny because they imply all these women would remain chaste if a guy didn’t sleep around and that women see, virgin partners rather than what they actually do, avoid them.

    • @randalldraco3822
      @randalldraco3822 Před 28 dny +11

      No, its not the same. Women and men are different. Men are suppose to spred their seed, women should focus and find safety.

    • @carolallison9685
      @carolallison9685 Před 28 dny +10

      ​@randalldraco3822 haha what? Oh sweetie no. Actually, according to anthropologists, both men and women should sleep around when young, then settle down when older. Perhistoric humans slept around so much that none of the men knew whose child was whose. This led to everyone caring for all of the children. Thats that village. Monogamy didnt come around until agriculture became widespread. Men no longer had the village, so they were now farming and only had their own resources. This meant he had to make damn sure those kids were his because if not, no one is coming to help him. The fact is we are primates, and now im only an ecologist, so what would i know, but last time i was studying other great ape species, i didnt notice any monogamy. Now maybe im just a crackpot scientist, but im pretty sure no species of prinate is monogamous.

    • @albertlevins9191
      @albertlevins9191 Před 28 dny +4

      I didn't understand a single one of these comments.
      Honestly.
      What are you people saying?
      Is this some kind of code?

    • @fs5775
      @fs5775 Před 14 dny +1

      @@albertlevins9191it’s a Chris Williamson podcast, keep your standards low

  • @PeterBarber
    @PeterBarber Před 27 dny

    One of my favorites ever -- awesome chat

  • @wojohowitz5432
    @wojohowitz5432 Před 28 dny +11

    Wow. This conversation landed somewhere between a throat punch and a hug! Mr. Williamson you are rocking the podcast world. Mr. Glover you are pushing the limits of the human condition. Thank-you both.

  • @ameliereinhart9482
    @ameliereinhart9482 Před 28 dny +6

    Chasing the hot woman = approval seeking., pounding on closed doors, making her the Alpha.
    In this case men exploit the beauty of that woman to signal to other men their „status“. Which is the status of a approval seeking guy. I think he is spot on with the mother analogy.
    Choose a woman who chooses you! Go through the open door. And learn to live alone before you enter a relationship. If you can’t stand hearing your own heartbeat you can’t be in a relationship.

  • @MASKM333
    @MASKM333 Před 27 dny +2

    Smart work is working on what really matters , on improving yourself everyday , even if just by 1%. Kudos to you 👏.

  • @raphaelantoine7331
    @raphaelantoine7331 Před 24 dny +2

    This is a really great interview, loved every minute of it ❤️

  • @Msal19
    @Msal19 Před 26 dny +1

    One of my favourite episodes from this show. No More Mr Nice Guy is a really good book from Robert

  • @Sam-bm7gs
    @Sam-bm7gs Před 21 dnem

    Dr Glover is the best. Glad you had him in again Chris, love this episode

  • @hendryxtracey2708
    @hendryxtracey2708 Před 27 dny +1

    This was full of little quotes that would make great possible episode titles. I really enjoyed this one 👌🏽

  • @Kate-rv6kx
    @Kate-rv6kx Před 25 dny

    Your insights about women's experiences were spot on. Couldn't have loved this episode more, unless you gave specific examples of modern handkerchief dropping. Spell it out. What do I need to do?

  • @guapepenguin
    @guapepenguin Před 28 dny +43

    We needed another episode with him, thanks Chris!

  • @DANJEDI
    @DANJEDI Před 26 dny

    Wise, Insightful!! Good Show 👍

  • @artofevan4699
    @artofevan4699 Před 9 dny

    It almost never happens that a woman I’m attracted to knocks on my door to meet me. So I go out and approach. It can be intimidating to approach a woman I’m attracted to. Relying on subtle indicators of interest too much can be self defeating. I feel a guy just has to go for what he wants within social norms, feel the fear & do it anyway, and frequently get rejected.

  • @thomashotton
    @thomashotton Před 26 dny +1

    I love how Dc GLover put finally the real deal with hardwork and frame it for what really is not like all pseudos entrpreneurs.

    • @valentynkhaman7688
      @valentynkhaman7688 Před 26 dny

      Yes, not just blindly work hard which sounds like bash your head of the wall

  • @eduardoquiroga9666
    @eduardoquiroga9666 Před 25 dny +1

    Great Podcast! Terrrible ending point. It was getting so gooood, why end it thereee brother!!?? hahahaha Legends anyway

  • @levalas91
    @levalas91 Před 28 dny +8

    Another great episode with him, thank you Chris!
    I find the title awkward though. It is maybe just my impression but the title makes it seem as if there would be a surplus of high quality women that lack their high quality male counterpart. This idea or notion is apparent in a lot of content these days and it puts the blame on men. So if all men would just level up, the bidirectional supply would meet the demand. Looking at my social circle and the people I know/knew from uni and work, I feel like both genders are both equally changelled to be quality partners and I wouldn't say that either side is in a nicer position then the other. Everybody likes to point at the cavedweller with cheetodust on his chest who watches porn and plays games all day. Nobody seems to admit that a neurotic, avoidant and manipulative 30yo female lawyer who is emotionally immature, has her mother do the cleaning and laundry, who has an alcoholproblem and who is deep into astrology and tarot-cards is equally undateable. "Adult-Failure-ism" has a female archetype just aswell.

    • @Kate-rv6kx
      @Kate-rv6kx Před 25 dny

      I think because Chris and most of his guests are men, they tend to give advice to men, not women. I agree that women have just as many issues, and I'd like some advice too, but it seems like the whole genre of philosophy and self-improvement podcasts is by men for men. Or maybe it's just that women's podcasts seem so extreme to me.

    • @dahliaherrod4301
      @dahliaherrod4301 Před 20 dny

      @@Kate-rv6kx There are some good podcasts marketed to women but they do terrible numbers which is probably why they don't hit your feed.

  • @user-wj3bn1yi8f
    @user-wj3bn1yi8f Před 28 dny +22

    Hmm. Listening to him a little more, I suddenly realised why this man has so many failed marriages behind him.

    • @Johnny-Cage
      @Johnny-Cage Před 27 dny +3

      Please elaborate

    • @pamcollins2178
      @pamcollins2178 Před 26 dny +1

      I’m 30 minutes in & hes a likable fella, but I don’t know if a fella who’s been divorced twice is a viable life coach. Both divorces could be the wives’ fault, I guess? Or I guess he might be a ‘do as I say, not as I do’ coach 🤔

    • @ralphfraz
      @ralphfraz Před 26 dny +5

      As I've gotten older I realize that although some may have valuable insight, no one has all the answers or should be viewed as a guru. Even if someone found all THEIR answers, there's little chance they will all be perfectly applicable to you

    • @jamin12342
      @jamin12342 Před 24 dny +1

      Of course, since you are the expert on failed marriages.

  • @huntersmith8477
    @huntersmith8477 Před 12 dny

    One of the OG’s of the OG’s! I appreciate your work Dr Glover!

  • @scproinc
    @scproinc Před 28 dny +7

    "I was able to get it better, therefore anyone can be as lucky as I am!!"

  • @antonioreed5974
    @antonioreed5974 Před 27 dny

    Hey Chris, long time listener of the podcast. I just finished listening to this episode on Apple Podcasts, and I thought I’d recommend some guests who I think you’d enjoy discussing ideas with.
    List of potential interviewees on the podcast:
    Sisyphus 55, FD Signifier, Gerbert Johnson (all CZcamsrs)

  • @timr8456
    @timr8456 Před 24 dny +2

    16:51 had to pause and reflect after that one
    30:36 yuuuuup.
    1:10:08-1:20:24 great segment

  • @jaredmello
    @jaredmello Před 28 dny +5

    Always good to see Dr. Robert Glover!

  • @orenm1454
    @orenm1454 Před 26 dny +1

    I really loved the book and all. I also appreciate all the content he’s given for free . On the other end the guy has a PHD ofcourse that will impress women . The guy is in a transactional relationship with a much younger woman which he allowed her to sleep around & he is basically paying for everything. Once he will stop paying for everything he won’t have a wife. Not much different from passport bros mentality. Not really practicing what he preaches. Just took the shortcut. Picking up a woman from the slums when you are a “billioner” in her book is basically renting a girlfriend.

  • @sadiapsychology
    @sadiapsychology Před 20 dny +1

    Robert is fantastic !

  • @danielalbornoz2441
    @danielalbornoz2441 Před 27 dny +3

    this episode was SOO freacking helpful and digestable. thank you Chris for having the Dr. Glover

  • @robyncohen8542
    @robyncohen8542 Před 28 dny +4

    Thank you Chris, its so wonderful to listen to your deep, interesting discussions.

  • @nackedgrils9302
    @nackedgrils9302 Před 7 dny

    I'll admit that the ''walking through open doors'' approach does work better because I've never taken the risk to do a cold approach, the few girls I've dated had all given me a sign that they were interested beforehand and, looking back on it, I don't really feel good about it because it made me feel like a predator choosing the easiest prey, I'd get into her just because I knew that she was into me first. Also, the girls/women that will too easily give you strong signs of interest might not be the healthiest, I've learned that at my own expense, there has to be some elegance to it.

  • @kimchimasala
    @kimchimasala Před 28 dny +7

    Thank you so much Chris for bringing him back in person. His book was very helpful to me at a challenging time of my life.

  • @JinglesPfeff
    @JinglesPfeff Před 27 dny +17

    My guy has been married like a half dozen times and he's here to give relationship advice. Got it. I'll tune in after I get back from my financial advising meeting with a guy who lives in a cardboard box.

    • @JinglesPfeff
      @JinglesPfeff Před 26 dny +2

      Yes dude 100% you are right, this guy mangled his relationships until he was 50 and then married a gal he met at a resort spa. I'll listen to him if I want tips on how to completely fuck up my life until I become a seedy old man who gals dig because of their daddy complex.

    • @revkallisto
      @revkallisto Před 25 dny

      ​@@thecordialistapparently not

    • @fs5775
      @fs5775 Před 14 dny

      🤣👊

    • @15fear18
      @15fear18 Před dnem

      he's much older than you are and sharing his own experiences. he didnt fuck up his life because at the end hes exactly where he's want to be. he realized his errors too late and youre young, if you listen to what he has to tell you after living a life of 50 years, you can easily avoid all the "fuck-ups" he went through.

  • @mattanderson6672
    @mattanderson6672 Před 19 dny

    Thank you both

  • @polyticks04
    @polyticks04 Před 28 dny +1

    Such a great episode - thank you both for taking the time to put this out.

  • @Rawmel84
    @Rawmel84 Před 28 dny +4

    It’s all about enlightened self interest ! Doesn’t mean don’t help people but that I can better help others when I take care of myself first . When the airplane ✈️ loses cabin pressure you’re supposed to put on your oxygen mask on before your child .

  • @hablabamosa
    @hablabamosa Před 28 dny +3

    Glover's book is one of the best books on the matter. He goes beyond the superficial RP talking points.

  • @AcidburnxVx195
    @AcidburnxVx195 Před 28 dny +47

    6:28 uhhh no.. maybe in the early 2000’s but the last few school shooters have have been mixed race and a trans person.. idk if this bodes well for the ep but inaccurate broad strokes doesn’t seem like the best thing to use when your trying to preach.

    • @zimzob
      @zimzob Před 28 dny +9

      There’s been three trans-identifying school shooters in recent years, Aurora CO, Moscow ID , Nashville TN

    • @senpai_dolph7873
      @senpai_dolph7873 Před 28 dny

      🙄

    • @lukemacon1
      @lukemacon1 Před 28 dny +7

      He was clearly speaking in general terms. Don’t nit pick like that it’s a friggin 2h pod cast

    • @TheDanielLivingston
      @TheDanielLivingston Před 28 dny +4

      @@lukemacon1Exactly. It's making a mountain out of a molehill

  • @Secretname951
    @Secretname951 Před 23 dny

    I’m enjoying your recent arc!

  • @Gary-mu1bu
    @Gary-mu1bu Před 28 dny +4

    Doing a great job with your interviews thanks

  • @Walkerxy
    @Walkerxy Před 21 dnem

    I feel like self loathing is a double edge sword. It ruins a lot but it’s also the only thing that’s ever made me improve parts of myself.

    • @Walkerxy
      @Walkerxy Před 20 dny

      @@brianmeen2158 well yeah, there’s a right way and wrong way. Like I’ve done both, was stuck wallowing from 4-25 before I figured out to use it to create a better man.
      If all your self hate makes you crumble then it’s terrible; but if you learn to use it as a motivator then it’s not as bad.

  • @Morjixxo
    @Morjixxo Před 22 dny

    This is a really mature take on dating life.

  • @cheecheneg
    @cheecheneg Před 27 dny +3

    Chris is back on the dating scene? Watch out for that black pill!

  • @mnm2481
    @mnm2481 Před 21 dnem

    Great interview, would have loved to hear more about a couple of things you discuss around 1:30:00. That is, the desire for attention and the paradox of unlimited choice. I´d say these are not unique to ´men´ or ´women´, these affect everyone.

  • @JustinKieferMarine
    @JustinKieferMarine Před 28 dny +2

    Yesss another one Dr Glover!! Everybody should read his book! Changed my life

  • @braddub8145
    @braddub8145 Před 9 dny

    Love all his perspectives on being outcome-agnostic, and just exercising healthy openness. I've seen this in a female friend of mine, she will talk to AAAAAAAANYONE, and I was always very envious of how she did that because, talkative as I am, I'm also awkward as fuck, but I eventually realised the only way to not be envious was to exercise this approach myself. It's been a mixed bag, and I certainly haven't been as consistent as I like, but hearing this makes me wanna give it that little bit more effort

  • @user-ee1fn4vt8b
    @user-ee1fn4vt8b Před 28 dny +1

    8:35 I love the maneuver Chris pulls off here. When you're trying to speak for the other side but the interviewee just doesn't consider that point legitimate it's easy to get into an argument with the person you're interviewing but Chris is experienced enough to just state the interviewee's position without becoming confrontational and move on. Nicely done.

  • @djgeilerhengst7630
    @djgeilerhengst7630 Před 26 dny

    Hey Chris i love your Videos they helped so much during my life, they changed my perspective how i should pursuit life. I would like to thank you for your dedicated work to make people like me my life better. For the next Podcast i would love to hear from Mohnish Pabrai. He is in the greatest Investors during our time, who has a kind interesting perspective about life and investing and he lives in Austin Texas.

  • @andrewazouz3654
    @andrewazouz3654 Před 28 dny +3

    Amazing talk!

  • @Aquamentii
    @Aquamentii Před 28 dny +5

    Read his book last month. It gives you a lot to think about.

  • @Brndndutton
    @Brndndutton Před 28 dny +3

    Another solid episode…… wow 💙

  • @debbiebartolo
    @debbiebartolo Před 28 dny +3

    A good woman should respond to a man’s needs as well as the other way around. It’s called a relationship and especially in a marriage. Women with drama stay in drama. They probably meet physical needs but not emotional needs, and wear them down. I have been married twice, one for 17 years, and then my high school boyfriend later for 23 years. They cheated in both cases and I was there for their needs, physically and emotionally. I’m still friends with my first husband who remarried someone wonderful, and is the father of my daughter. I’m in a different age bracket that a lot doesn’t apply. I don’t really have hopes of meeting someone that has the characteristics that they are looking for, as well as myself, but that’s okay. BTW, at 64 I’m still fit and attractive, especially for my age.

    • @debbiebartolo
      @debbiebartolo Před 28 dny

      And I don’t think I’m perfect in any way. But I have always been respectful of my husband’s interests, and issues. I find that they were more interested in themselves, than me, but not as bad in my 1st marriage.

  • @DelSunflower33
    @DelSunflower33 Před 26 dny +2

    59:20 yeah poor people do hard work however they have the richest souls and most wholeheartedly living that includes family and community too. Now at 38 I do have patterns I haven’t grown out of when it comes to money however the things I miss the most and I’m consciously creating for myself are the ones of lesser material things and more connections with others, bcuz when I was poor that is what made my life so FULL

  • @PedroGomez-xf3be
    @PedroGomez-xf3be Před 28 dny +2

    Great interview 👍

  • @ShaunleeSalyers
    @ShaunleeSalyers Před 20 dny

    I realize this episode is geared for men, but most of it is good "human" advice for men, women, and anyone in between ... interesting to watch as a single mom raising two young men and wanting them to grow up to be great partners as well as secure men who do a bit of good in the world.

  • @Robert_Westwood
    @Robert_Westwood Před 28 dny +6

    Before I watch the video, no need for me to to be told this. I would never date someone who is as annoying as my mother. And i have lived in my own for the equivalent of 19 of the last 20 years, so I'm not interested in a caretaker who will do shit for me...

  • @Valiantiron
    @Valiantiron Před 28 dny +7

    As a woman whose exes felt that I should be the one doing all the cooking, cleaning, maintaining my body so it fits their image, and among other things, not a day went by that I didn't feel like I was like a mother to them. Thought it was just me because my female peers were doing the same- it's honestly validating to know that men are noticing this pattern

    • @tomcoop9750
      @tomcoop9750 Před 28 dny +7

      You shouldn’t be forced to cook and clean. But you should stay fit and maintain a healthy weight.

    • @Pikawarps
      @Pikawarps Před 28 dny +5

      You picked the jerks and complain they were jerks. Find the balance of nice guy and jerk.

    • @adriansanchez4875
      @adriansanchez4875 Před 28 dny +5

      ​@@tomcoop9750 😂😂yeah that one is different than the cooking and cleaning. getting fat is unacceptable. but then again, if you want your woman to stay fit, you should look for a gym rat, can't expect an average woman to stay in shape if they don't enjoy the lifestyle

    • @stevecooper7883
      @stevecooper7883 Před 26 dny +1

      ​@@adriansanchez4875Couples that lift together live longer together 😅

    • @fs5775
      @fs5775 Před 14 dny +1

      You summed up exactly why a high quality woman like me remains single despite all my options. You need to be bringing something to the relationship other than extra work for me. I’m financially independent and I don’t want to be a man’s mommy.

  • @HarryJoiner
    @HarryJoiner Před 19 dny

    20:05 - “We like the ghetto we know.” Love that.

  • @Nobody-bu7nb
    @Nobody-bu7nb Před 28 dny +8

    Big love to Chris

  • @Anonymous.User.0419
    @Anonymous.User.0419 Před 27 dny

    Yes!

  • @HomeshighlandPark
    @HomeshighlandPark Před 28 dny +4

    Most true words

  • @ryanl1987
    @ryanl1987 Před 27 dny +2

    Can’t wait to self isolate to my cabin in the woods society is a joke . Trust no one / especially a woman . Nomad life . Only me/ not me too

  •  Před 9 dny

    Hahah!!! “Particularly Slow mentally disabled golden retrievers” GOLD!

  • @roguekantian5605
    @roguekantian5605 Před 21 dnem

    I recognize that I'm a incel, but I also recognize that it is by choice. I blame no one but myself, and I'll likely be doing so until I die.

    • @THX-C
      @THX-C Před 16 dny +1

      If you choose to be celibate, wouldn’t that mean you aren’t an incel? I’m doing work on myself and am avoiding women at the moment. Part of my work is not being so harsh with myself. You can figure this out. I don’t know you if you can type an entire paragraph without a single typo, you can do this. Good luck!

  • @mathiansim8573
    @mathiansim8573 Před 19 hodinami

    Try salsa dancing with a random lady in South Africa & you're basically setting a PK timer.

  • @brianl1341
    @brianl1341 Před 28 dny +24

    Just accept that for men dating is a waste of time. Take s@x out of the so called relationship would you continue to put up with the risk, nonsense and mental gymnastics?
    My male friends that are in relationships reach out to me to do things all the time, rather hang with men than women save one thing.
    Find your peace and what makes you happy and do it.
    The narrative of late is trying to bring men back to the plantation of servitude. To many have just come to take a hard pass after realizing the cost is too many times the benefit.

    • @dhqbrandi
      @dhqbrandi Před 28 dny +2

      For now but as they get more serious as in having a family and more responsibilities they will likely drop off little by little

    • @brianl1341
      @brianl1341 Před 28 dny +8

      @brianmeen2158 Dude good points. However based on my experience and that of most of my friends in the past. Getting dates, intimacy and a relationship was pretty easy to a point I had a very high turnover when purely single.
      However over time watching women in the workplace, outside of it and watching the situations unfold it was eye opening if not shocking at times.
      It was women and thier behavior that redpilled many. Guys like me may take an offer on occasion but the calculations of risk become paramount.
      Freedom and peace is to be cherished and if someone or something has the ability to destroy that than its not worth it.
      Don't assume a number of guys can't get a date or more. Maybe just maybe it is a conscious decision to not expose oneself to the risk and turmoil.

    • @Burton3375
      @Burton3375 Před 28 dny +4

      @@brianmeen2158I see you never tried online dating that’s why men gave up…..

    • @seemlesslies
      @seemlesslies Před 28 dny +2

      @@brianmeen2158 The problem is that good women are already taken. If you had touched online dating you would know this. The only women that are really left are the dredges. Quality women are generally taken off the market almost instantly because the sheer amount of attention they get. A women of average level attraction likely gets hit on multiple times a week in public. If shes of average level attractiveness and she isn't insane she can find herself a decent man.

  • @renaissance17
    @renaissance17 Před 15 dny +2

    With all do respect, this dude is on his THIRD marriage, and it’s in Mexico, IE a passport bro marriage. He’s implying incels’ situation is self inflicted, but if the light at the end of the tunnel for them is THREE marriages, maybe the incels have the right idea

    • @fs5775
      @fs5775 Před 14 dny

      passport bro shares his "wisdom" on how to score wives 🤣🤣 Tip #1: say "yes" to the Mexican massage lady on the beach in Mexico 🤣🤣

    • @Jhawk_2k
      @Jhawk_2k Před 13 dny

      With all due respect it's *due*, not do

  • @zelice3270
    @zelice3270 Před 19 dny

    Single ? You ? 😮 that is such a beautiful coincidence and now here is my handkerchief 🎉

  • @jep3305
    @jep3305 Před 8 dny

    M. Scott Peck Genius.

  • @Xo1ot1
    @Xo1ot1 Před 28 dny +23

    The shitposter in me wants to say that I don't take dating advice from someone who looks like he's wearing a glued on Santa beard.

    • @Photik
      @Photik Před 28 dny +2

      Regardless of how he looks, his book is pretty good. It's available for free on CZcams. Definitely recommend it.

  • @nutzer5714
    @nutzer5714 Před 28 dny

    Great Conversation

  • @Slim-MMA
    @Slim-MMA Před 28 dny +34

    1. They aren’t attractive enough to do so in today’s skewed Western dating market.
    2. There’s a lack of quality women in Western society today.

    • @ec3328
      @ec3328 Před 28 dny +1

      the Loooooooox

    • @markstanding8538
      @markstanding8538 Před 28 dny +8

      No. There has always been a lack of quality men though. They're usually the ones moaning that women don't want them.

  • @WuhSuhDood
    @WuhSuhDood Před 27 dny

    No more Mr Nice Guy is a great book

  • @VampireCrusader
    @VampireCrusader Před 8 dny

    Dont leave a mum unguared around this man

  • @adelb7897
    @adelb7897 Před 28 dny +7

    A woman can improve her receptiveness, try to show signs of wanting a man to ask for her number, treat a man as a mentally disabled golden retriever. OR... simply just as the men out or ask the men for their number, it's that simple. But nah 'female nature' and all that crap, I think it's at least partially socialized. We should encourage more women to ask men out more explicitly.

    • @txdmsk
      @txdmsk Před 25 dny

      And we should also encourage golden retrievers to do our taxes, alas, it is in their nature not to. Like the scorpion's that stung the kind frog.

    • @adelb7897
      @adelb7897 Před 22 dny

      @@txdmsk Unfortunately, that is a very poor analogy. You are essentially saying that an impossible event is equivalent to an unlikely event.
      Not a single golden retriever in the history of the world has been able to successfully do taxes, versus in my life alone, there's been several women who asked me out or asked for my number. I also know of other guys who've also been asked out by girls. Sure it is unlikely (happens less than 50% of the time, probably closer to 10% of the time) but it happens actually way more often than you might think.
      Also, I don't think being so pessimistic and defeatist is good for one's mental health.

  • @federoffm
    @federoffm Před 27 dny +18

    Nah....it's hard to imagine the dude working on his 4th marriage has much to say on the subject of successful relationships. You can't lead others to where you've never been.

    • @AllTheUrbanLegends
      @AllTheUrbanLegends Před 27 dny +4

      Not that this guy can't give advice on anything but I'm definitely not interested in his relationship advice. It seems like he's doubling down on the selfishness that has caused him problems throughout his life - specifically giving with the expectation of reciprocity. You give because you can and because you want to and to give joy to the people you care about. Quid pro quo might be good for business but not for a man who cares for a family and friends. That doesn't mean there can't be people in your family who are selfish and try to suck you dry - but part of growing up is recognizing who those people are and keeping them at arms length.

    • @federoffm
      @federoffm Před 27 dny +3

      @@Stierenkloot Nope. A girlfriend is not a wife. A completely different level of commitment and meaning.

    • @jordanparanihi1947
      @jordanparanihi1947 Před 27 dny +6

      I hear what your saying. However instead of judging past actions, wouldn't it be more pertinent to look at the current person? Generally, the most inspiring people on the planet are that way because they've gone through/continue to practice overcoming some sort of struggle or wrong action, or their feat is just simply not that inspiring. And perhaps the inverse of what you're judging could be true. It would seem that perhaps he needed to go through everything he did and make all those choices in order to learn what he has. I mean, David Goggins spent years morbidly obese going nowhere and incapable of much, but it wouldn't be so fair to say we should judge him on those actions and say you couldn't learn a thing or two from his behaviours now to achieve some pretty great results. He was there once, and because of that he now understands what it takes to get out of it and can genuinely relate to what stops people. It seems likely Dr Glover only knows how to give advice in this arena because he failed enough times to get what doesn't work. You mustn't understand how much of the most successful people's lives are made up of failure. Generally, the majority of it. Took 10,000 failures before Edison made the lightbulb. Steve Jobs, Google, etc etc, all their achievements based around learning from failure. Did they ace some things and now lead the world? Yeah. The proof is in the pudding right? Dr Glover's work has radically transformed so many men's lives and relationships. I was just talking with one the other night - complete and utter different man and relationship. In their late 50's, decades of disconnected pain of the man behaving just like Dr Glover says, until he found this book, hit reality and changed his entire life. Now they're like two lovesick teenagers again. It's so inspiring. He doesn't stop talking about Dr Glover's book. My husband is going through that same process, and it's changing me too. Truth is truth, no mater who delivers it and how they came to see it.. The coin only drops for you when you're ready to hear it though.

    • @kieranriches1089
      @kieranriches1089 Před 26 dny

      @@jordanparanihi1947perfect response 👏

    • @thecordialist
      @thecordialist Před 26 dny +3

      This frequently made comment about his past marriages is so fucking ignorant. Do you listen? At all? He is currently on his third marriage. His first two marriages - particularly his second marriage - were the catalyst for him to go get help and figure out why there were problems his marriages. He writes very candidly about this in No More Mr. Nice Guy.
      Honestly, does anyone ACTUALLY LISTEN before they comment?

  • @aaronsmithjr.5505
    @aaronsmithjr.5505 Před 28 dny

    I’m a little confused, is being an outcome agnostic about spiritually being OK with any and every possible outcome that could happen to you, if you say yes to most things in life?

  • @jep3305
    @jep3305 Před 8 dny

    I'm a little confused, as it seems to me that Dr. Glover is calling men hypergamous (I can't be with this one bc. another, hotter one might turn up). This in my experience is not the way men (outside the infamous 5 % top guys) behave in relationships.

  • @SteveDave211
    @SteveDave211 Před 3 dny

    Not only dating yet also turning those women into Moms.

  • @therealdonaldtrump4528

    1:19:00

  • @urmanascrewed
    @urmanascrewed Před 24 dny +2

    I didn't make it too far into the podcast before deciding this is a weaker guest. The big problem when criticizing men's loneliness is HOW are you supposed to surround yourself with people that care about you? Like if it was so simple this wouldn't be an issue in the first place. You can't just order great friends and family off of a menu.

    • @MajorWookie
      @MajorWookie Před 24 dny

      I hope you keep watching. It’s not simple to surround yourself with solid men. It will likely involve you learning a new skill that men typically congregate around like combat sports, physical sports like CrossFit or basketball sports, weapons, tactics and training, “dude stuff.”
      Go to work for what you want even if it’s better relationships

    • @urmanascrewed
      @urmanascrewed Před 24 dny +1

      @@MajorWookie I like this explannation, thank you! I have done some of these, but not all stick or are kind of expensive to do consistently.
      I like playing pick up basketball and soccer, but it is usually different people there each time.

    • @MajorWookie
      @MajorWookie Před 23 dny +1

      @@urmanascrewed yeah. I think I really believe it’s harder for men to make/find quality friend group. It’s a mix of doing things we like, being able to be vulnerable with each other, proximity, consistency and more.
      I do know that men like to do things and the best male friends I’ve made have come from doing things that are hard. For me Jiujitsu was my thing. All of my male friendships are through jiujitsu but I understand that’s not for everything. There also this thing called F3 that looks cool.
      I hope your find your pack brother