Interpersonal Effectiveness Extras: I-It vs. I-Thou Relationships

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  • čas přidán 6. 09. 2024
  • Dr. May discusses the difference between Martin Buber's concepts of I-It relationships (superficial, need-based) and I-Thou relationships (seeing and accepting someone as a whole person). She also talks about ways we can work toward moving some of our one-dimensional relationships into deeper ones.
    **This channel contains videos of ALL the Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills, Radically Open DBT skills, and the full Sensorimotor Psychotherapy curriculum (*designed to help with attachment and trauma problems). For updates and easy access to content, feel free to SUBSCRIBE.

Komentáře • 70

  • @allritchclermont221
    @allritchclermont221 Před 6 měsíci +2

    "Remember what we have in common rather than what separates us".
    This quote is so deep; it says it all. Thank you so much!!

  • @nare9149
    @nare9149 Před 2 lety +8

    I think everyone should watch this video, better yet it should be a part of the education curriculum. Instead of yelling at each other we explore why we are the way that we are and what we can do about it.

    • @Plasmafox
      @Plasmafox Před 3 měsíci

      We tried that until people cut from the same cloth as the originator of this idea decided some people don't get a voice in that conversation.

  • @victoriacoronado1631
    @victoriacoronado1631 Před rokem +2

    I came into this video with an I-it relationship and felt like I left with an I-thou relationship. Thank you very much for putting this video on the internet available for people like me learn.

  • @atheistyoda8915
    @atheistyoda8915 Před 2 lety +3

    Thanks! My teacher couldn't explain this quite well due to their internet connection not being good. These explanations allowed me to understand the concept pretty easily.

  • @valeriabustillos2719
    @valeriabustillos2719 Před 11 měsíci +1

    You helped me in ways I didn't know I needed. Thanks!

  • @MoneyMagnetHacks
    @MoneyMagnetHacks Před 3 lety +7

    This really helped me to understand it easier so thank you so much :)

  • @LeonTsao
    @LeonTsao Před 3 lety +2

    This is beautiful. A worthwhile lesson! Especially summed up well with the Buddhist quote, I'll remember that one.

  • @jeremiahsmarketing
    @jeremiahsmarketing Před 2 lety

    This is real Practical Dr.May....thanks alot. I Learnt something valuable from this and not not that alone but understanding

  • @alldentulayba5806
    @alldentulayba5806 Před 2 lety +1

    this really helped me to understand better these two concept

  • @study3145
    @study3145 Před 2 lety +1

    Thank you so much for this comprehensive explanation. Helps me a lot.

  • @theresaoclarit6746
    @theresaoclarit6746 Před 2 lety +1

    thank you for this informative video. It helped me understand our Philosophy lesson.

  • @princessvuyolwethumntonint4490

    Very valuable lesson, thank you.

  • @kylepatrickmurphy4058
    @kylepatrickmurphy4058 Před 3 lety +1

    Very good work Dr! Thank you! 🥰🥰🥰

  • @aleecheekhong
    @aleecheekhong Před 4 lety

    Thanks a lot Dr. Jennifer May for your teaching on the difference between Buber's concepts of I-IT relationships and I-Thou relationships. Reflection: Do I relate someone as it or as thou?

  • @mariapena6483
    @mariapena6483 Před rokem +1

    Thank you for a thorough explanation of both concepts. It has certainly helped me understand it better for a graduate class I'm taking. Can you give us an example of how the "I-Thou" relationship/perspective could help improve the workplace?

    • @jennifermayph.d.2761
      @jennifermayph.d.2761  Před rokem +1

      Hi Maria,
      That's a good question!
      I would say that examples of I-It in the workplace include when we see people just as their roles rather than whole people. So the housekeeper is just a one-dimensional person in a low position cleaning up around the office. A boss is some jerk in authority telling me what to do to drive me crazy doing a lot of unnecessary things. The salesperson is just a guy who helps to bring in money to help the company's bottom line.
      When we see these people as one-dimensional, we may end up being rude, biased, stereotyped, or disrespectful. But if we start to remember that all of those people are whole human beings with feelings, a life outside the workplace, and a family, it helps us interact with them more compassionately. When people at work feel more appreciated and respected, less like a "number," they tend to have higher job satisfaction. They might put more effort into their work and feel more invested in the company rather than just doing the bare minimum to scrape by and get a paycheck.
      Hope that helps!
      Dr. May :-)

    • @mariapena6483
      @mariapena6483 Před rokem +1

      @@jennifermayph.d.2761 Thank you. These were very good examples!

  • @yanwrites4984
    @yanwrites4984 Před 3 lety +1

    Thankx, it was really helpful... Appreciate your efforts

  • @davidbradley4305
    @davidbradley4305 Před 4 lety +2

    Good advice for not objectifying or going to prejudice

  • @cathrinemahwire2949
    @cathrinemahwire2949 Před rokem

    Thank you incredibly much. I learned a lot from this video because it is very detailed.🍀❤

  • @ilovecartmanz
    @ilovecartmanz Před 2 lety

    Thank you very much, ma'am! This helped me understand our lesson even more❤️

  • @SuperFaby27
    @SuperFaby27 Před 2 lety +1

    thank you, this has been very helpful.

  • @gailalexisdamilig9140
    @gailalexisdamilig9140 Před 3 lety +2

    helped me a lot! THANK U SO MUCH!

  • @aialjung7872
    @aialjung7872 Před 3 lety +1

    THIS WAS SO GOOD

  • @litonGod
    @litonGod Před 3 lety +1

    Your vids are awesome! Thanks!

  • @drdj148
    @drdj148 Před rokem

    This is great! Nice job!

  • @joshuadominiquemaaba4734
    @joshuadominiquemaaba4734 Před 2 lety +1

    Thank you ma'am!!

  • @kylepatrickmurphy4058

    Great video as always!

  • @angelibacalso306
    @angelibacalso306 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you so much for this video:)

  • @abduljarickasper1871
    @abduljarickasper1871 Před 2 lety +1

    thank u so much maam.

  • @mhikosingalawa9200
    @mhikosingalawa9200 Před rokem

    thank you po❤️❤️

  • @Mattn2819
    @Mattn2819 Před 2 lety

    This is very good thanks so much.

  • @luxcity9034
    @luxcity9034 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you so much po💛

  • @ankitupadhyay0427
    @ankitupadhyay0427 Před 2 lety

    Hi, I'm from India.
    Tommorrow is my exam 😀
    Seriously, thank you for such a wonderful session. ❤️

  • @beriawalter2391
    @beriawalter2391 Před 3 lety +1

    thank you so much

  • @gbrielle4445
    @gbrielle4445 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you!!🤍

  • @myspiritway
    @myspiritway Před 2 lety

    Namaste to all of you

  • @maryeileenhammond2940
    @maryeileenhammond2940 Před 2 lety +2

    I would love to share this with my students. Could you please turn closed captioning on? If you set the video language to English, CZcams will auto-caption it for you.

    • @jennifermayph.d.2761
      @jennifermayph.d.2761  Před 2 lety

      OK, I just tried turning on the captions. Let me know if it works!

    • @maryeileenhammond2940
      @maryeileenhammond2940 Před 2 lety

      @@jennifermayph.d.2761 I'm still not seeing the option for captions. Have you set the language for this video? CZcams won't make captions if the language isn't set (there's no default language setting). Thanks for looking into this!

    • @jennifermayph.d.2761
      @jennifermayph.d.2761  Před 2 lety

      I selected English and said to turn on captions. I'm not sure what else to do...

    • @maryeileenhammond2940
      @maryeileenhammond2940 Před 2 lety

      @@jennifermayph.d.2761 Thanks for trying!

  • @pauladayrit7240
    @pauladayrit7240 Před 3 lety

    I-thou is so beautiful it's sad to even think about that we often interact in an i-it relationship

  • @jeremyjoanes1268
    @jeremyjoanes1268 Před rokem

    hey I appreciate this video !
    😀

  • @YusukeUrameshi166
    @YusukeUrameshi166 Před 2 lety

    Thanks! That was a very good explanation Ma'am.

  • @jhaveevalencia7340
    @jhaveevalencia7340 Před 3 lety

    Thank you po God bless

  • @crizzabelle8542
    @crizzabelle8542 Před 3 lety +1

    THANKYOU SO MUCH!

  • @dronpluge3391
    @dronpluge3391 Před rokem

    Muchh lovee

  • @xinaerogalang5203
    @xinaerogalang5203 Před 3 lety

    THANKS!!!

  • @sensei3119
    @sensei3119 Před 3 lety +1

    ❤️🙏

  • @Plasmafox
    @Plasmafox Před 3 měsíci

    If a person or group treats you like an it and you insist on treating them like a thou, all you're doing is harming yourself for no reason. There's no moral high ground in sacrificing yourself for someone who hates you.

    • @jennifermayph.d.2761
      @jennifermayph.d.2761  Před 3 měsíci

      You make a good point.
      There is a time and a place for I-it relationships and a time for I-thou relationships. It is our job to discern when each type is appropriate and makes sense given the situation.
      That being said, it is also possible to recognize someone’s humanity and set a strong boundary to protect yourself.