Wanda Sykes: I'ma be me- Doctor's Fruit Diagnosis/Edu System

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  • čas přidán 5. 07. 2010
  • Disclaimer: Copyrights reserved to HBO, Wanda Sykes talks about the doctor's fruit diagnosis and the education system.
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Komentáře • 268

  • @wendysgobbo1638
    @wendysgobbo1638 Před 7 lety +739

    This makes me laugh because when I was diagnosed with cancer the oncologist said that my tumor was the size of a mango...I had to go to the grocery store and see how big a mango was lol!

    • @edwardoerhunmwunsee3993
      @edwardoerhunmwunsee3993 Před 7 lety +9

      Wendy Sgobbo HAHAHAHA

    • @Euroviking86
      @Euroviking86 Před 6 lety +96

      That is funny, but I'm sorry to hear about your cancer. Hope you're doing alright.

    • @uchihahikaku1630
      @uchihahikaku1630 Před 6 lety +39

      I hope no one swapped the mango and watermelon signs that day

    • @popazz1
      @popazz1 Před 6 lety +30

      Wendy Sgobbo ... a year on from your comment and I hope you're in the clear.

    • @JaneDoe-ci3gj
      @JaneDoe-ci3gj Před 6 lety +14

      Wendy Sgobbo I hope you're doing better🙏

  • @beautifulellie1223
    @beautifulellie1223 Před 12 lety +349

    "If someone broke into my house and vacumed................I might be a little confused but I aint calling the cops hahahahaha excellent one haha

    • @birdchoyce1268
      @birdchoyce1268 Před 4 lety +12

      If someone broke into my home and cleaned I would be confused and then kindly escort them to the door🤔

    • @arturo6780
      @arturo6780 Před 2 lety

      @@birdchoyce1268 way to kill a joke

  • @Amagi1010
    @Amagi1010 Před 11 lety +226

    "We don't comprehend we just retain to spit that shit right out when the test comes" THANK YOU. My point why grades don't mean you're smart.

    • @Hyperplaterine
      @Hyperplaterine Před 6 lety +2

      Melyzza Med But poor grades are probably a good indicator that you are stupid, or lazy.

    • @victoriousvic2733
      @victoriousvic2733 Před 6 lety +2

      Bethan (Beth) Henshaw Not only do you learn something new you keep the neurons in your brain working so your brain grows new ones because later on in life our brains dry out. It's called brain atrophy, so the more you use it the longer your brain will remain sharp. The other thing is, you learn about discipline! It takes a lot of discipline and dedication to bust yo ass studying on the weekend when everyone else is out getting fkd up, or getting to class on time everyday and staying awake because paying attention in school teaches you to stay on top of the things you need to do at work. You also learn to follow directions which is a skill anyone needs when they go to work. without catching an attitude. It teaches you to think Independently and teaches you to work in groups to get projects done. It teaches you to speak properly and have good spelling and grammer skills. And at the end of it all you Finally Graduate and when you start looking for a job, your CV or Resume will list your accomplishments and how well you did so not only will you be able to have a Career that pays well, you will also be a Role Model to your kids! After all, how do you expect them to listen to you telling them to do their homework or get up for school when you never finished the 8th Grade. You can have a Career and make a lot of money doing nothing instead of busting your back just to make ends meet! It doesn't matter how long it takes, you don't have to do it overnight, but if you Truly want to be Independent and be able to afford Nice things, you gotta do it! Hope you change your view on this topic. I know it sucks and yes, it's true what she said, but that Dr had to remember the name of the tumor she had, don't you want a Dr who knows the termanology to every little thing inside your body so that he can communicate it to another Dr. Or would you rather your Dr talk in Fruit talk?

    • @Dev-zd3rx
      @Dev-zd3rx Před 4 lety +2

      @@Hyperplaterine I wouldn't say stupid..... maybe lazy

  • @themaggattack
    @themaggattack Před 6 lety +286

    "I'd take two Guatemalans, A Mexican and a boatload of Haitians for Octomom any day." 😆👍

    • @glenstinson1254
      @glenstinson1254 Před 6 lety +4

      tell us to our face and like the Matrix our ears won't let us read into it, because of what we have been taught in government Indoctrination camp that is K through 12. It's no wonder Europe thinks that Americans are the dumbest people on the plane. If you have any one of their degrees and most of it comes from an institution called the liebrary. What does this say about your iq NASA saying 2+2=5 and people believe that. I been taking a knee since second grade. When I actually found out the national anthems third verse cause they thought it might be a tad racist if you don't believe look up the missing third verse. It's for black and brown people. You won't believe it if I tell you, mabe you'll believe the writer Francis Scott key and if you do look up his other remarks in a publication named the intercept

    • @tidesofsilk4730
      @tidesofsilk4730 Před 4 lety

      WhatAWorld Literally AS I was reading this she was saying it lol

    • @sheilakatende8788
      @sheilakatende8788 Před 3 lety +1

      who is octomom?

  • @lisaaddas5282
    @lisaaddas5282 Před 5 lety +52

    I never get tired of you Wanda!!!!!!!

  • @michaeldallmeyer7557
    @michaeldallmeyer7557 Před 5 lety +37

    Wanda Sykes is the BEST comedian of all time! Omg! Absolutely love you Wanda Sykes! God bless you and your family always!

  • @billcordell9797
    @billcordell9797 Před 8 lety +148

    God I love Wanda Sykes!

    • @barbcarey383
      @barbcarey383 Před 4 lety +1

      I love this woman!!!

    • @Kate-fi8oh
      @Kate-fi8oh Před 4 lety +2

      I’ve been depressed as hell lately, and she is making me laugh out loud.

  • @kcwbar
    @kcwbar Před 9 lety +169

    Etch a sketch is about right.

  • @rawrxchristina
    @rawrxchristina Před 11 lety +152

    this reminds me before i had my surgery my doctor came in and tried to explain everything all technical and stuff. i let him finish and asked with a straight face, "now, can you dumb that down for me?" he laughed and said, "basically we're gonna cut you across the abdomen and peel you open like a banana." oh i cracked up lol.

    • @fivecitydirttracker4776
      @fivecitydirttracker4776 Před 4 lety

      Got to laugh......right ? Hope you're well.

    • @epdlp4506
      @epdlp4506 Před 3 lety +6

      I hope you are well. I had a pea sized one but it was in the deepest part of my brain. The doctors gave me small chances of survival. I was in a coma for 2 months. Now, I am totally aware and can walk with a walker.

  • @erinvaughn3739
    @erinvaughn3739 Před 6 lety +148

    Broke into my house and vacuumed ! 🖒💪👏🤣🤣

  • @sandradi7845
    @sandradi7845 Před 4 lety +45

    Probably the best immigration joke/description I ve ever heard.

  • @kensinkolongwane7012
    @kensinkolongwane7012 Před 7 lety +99

    love this woman she is very funny to watch

  • @popazz1
    @popazz1 Před 6 lety +32

    Oh now that line is just hilarious, brain like an Etch-A-Sketch!

  • @cindycompton7178
    @cindycompton7178 Před 2 lety +6

    Recently had surgery and developed a lump..the doctor said it was the size of a grapefruit... absolute truth..
    Thought of Wanda Sykes immediately..so funny

  • @Spliter546
    @Spliter546 Před 12 lety +51

    2:33 LMAO! "Done with that our brain is like a big etch n sketch......NEXT SUBJECT!"

  • @angelacuthill4067
    @angelacuthill4067 Před 4 lety +7

    Wanda , love you , you make the world better , your a really fantastic human being !!

  • @alexiscarrington-colby733
    @alexiscarrington-colby733 Před 5 lety +33

    I JUST URINATED ON MYSELF FROM LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY! SHE CAN MAKE YOU GO DELIRIOUS!

  • @amyrenee3896
    @amyrenee3896 Před 5 lety +15

    It's like our brains are a big etch a sketch 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @freddiemontanez8461
    @freddiemontanez8461 Před 4 lety +8

    Wanda Sykes, you made my day. You had laughing in tears. This comedy was so good. That I'm going to eat h it again. God bless you.

  • @psI6
    @psI6 Před 13 lety +58

    "Ewww i think i know this one... Your suppose to, your 32 u dumb mothawfu*ka" Hahahaha... awesome

  • @skylinebright9059
    @skylinebright9059 Před 6 lety +12

    I love this woman so sassy n hilarious 😄😂

  • @seanluzdeluna8153
    @seanluzdeluna8153 Před 3 lety +5

    Love this! 'Oh I think I know this one'
    "You're supposed to! You're 32 u dumb Motherfucker!"
    LMFAO! 😁😂🤣🤣
    And that immigration bit was clever. Octomom! Ha! 😁

  • @erichodges2218
    @erichodges2218 Před 7 lety +24

    love her

  • @uwsgrrrl9981
    @uwsgrrrl9981 Před 4 lety +2

    Love, love Wanda🥰

  • @negakirine
    @negakirine Před 6 lety +26

    Lol, true! My doc said the cysts on my kidney are... just like a grape. 😂 They‘re benign.

  • @AnyahBby
    @AnyahBby Před 12 lety +40

    America is one of the only countries that doesn't use the metric system.

    • @epdlp4506
      @epdlp4506 Před 4 lety +1

      Yes we are together with Canada, Australia and New Zealand.

    • @lenawagenfuehr53
      @lenawagenfuehr53 Před 4 lety +9

      @@epdlp4506 wrong. Australia and New Zealand use the metric system. USA is keeping company with Myanmar and Liberia. 🙄

    • @epdlp4506
      @epdlp4506 Před 3 lety +1

      @@lenawagenfuehr53 So we are less than we thought we were. Thank you

    • @annfields2429
      @annfields2429 Před 3 lety

      So

    • @xiaoqiaoxie
      @xiaoqiaoxie Před 2 lety

      Canada also switched to metric systems in the 70s. Although due to the heavy business exchange between US and Canada, the raw material is often measured using both systems.

  • @estellaedwards7120
    @estellaedwards7120 Před 4 lety +3

    She’s the best

  • @bp7792
    @bp7792 Před 4 lety +3

    I've always liked her voice

  • @DC-GAMER-202
    @DC-GAMER-202 Před 4 lety +2

    😆🤣😂 its almost 4am, im less than 2mins in and im biting the shit out my inner bottom lip to keep screaming out in laughter and waking the whole house!
    OMG i cant.. Man i should've gave wanda a chance sooner, she funny AF!

  • @itsjxomusic
    @itsjxomusic Před 4 lety +2

    Love Wanda 😭❤️

  • @malbmndayi5862
    @malbmndayi5862 Před 6 lety +70

    No, I still don't understand why Americans don't use the Metric system. Conversions are so much easier, all of life really! 😫

    • @darkwriter_xx94
      @darkwriter_xx94 Před 5 lety +5

      MalB Mndayi the weird thing is we use it for somethings and not others. Like 2 liters of soda or a 200 mg pill.

    • @dw999
      @dw999 Před 3 lety +1

      30g is about 1 ounce. 5ml is 1 tsp. 10cm is about 4". How hard is that? I (an American) use grams in the kitchen bc it's more precise -- better for baking.
      This country stinks bc radical, power-mad GOPs defund education -- bc, as #scumP himself has said, the poorly educated are its base. Anyone with even the most rudimentary critical-thinking skills wd see that the GOP serves only the wealthiest 5-10% of the population, and that a vote for the GOP is a vote for self-destruction.

  • @marieclark4609
    @marieclark4609 Před 5 lety +7

    I really love this one because it's so true she's so funny

  • @maxinebrody4988
    @maxinebrody4988 Před 3 lety +1

    Not too many comedians make me laugh out loud. I’m a strict judge. But I’m laughing out loud with this lady!

  • @sullivan2339
    @sullivan2339 Před 5 lety +2

    So Spot on in 2010- now in 2019.

  • @hammer-r
    @hammer-r Před 3 lety +1

    She is incredible.

  • @magsbayou
    @magsbayou Před 3 lety +1

    I have lived in Europe for 12 years and I am still not used to the metric system! I have a table that is 100 x 200. I usually try to guage from there :).

  • @msgeorgiaannettefranklin5493

    MS SYKES💕🥇😭

  • @GimGardashian
    @GimGardashian Před 6 lety +74

    Metric system is GREAT. Imperial system? BYE

  • @ared-ainu
    @ared-ainu Před 6 lety +36

    In Germany we call that "bulimia studying".

  • @Euroviking86
    @Euroviking86 Před 6 lety +45

    9 Centimeters is one TINY grapefruit. Grapes are barely that size.
    EDIT: I was so wrong about that and I'm sorry.

    • @AP-xb4tv
      @AP-xb4tv Před 6 lety +2

      setheurovision94 what?

    • @Euroviking86
      @Euroviking86 Před 6 lety +1

      ...well, do I feel foolish. Why did I think that? Lol!

    • @AP-xb4tv
      @AP-xb4tv Před 6 lety +2

      Ahahah. Happens. :)

    • @isaacdibbens8018
      @isaacdibbens8018 Před 5 lety

      Wtf? This was the most useless comment.

    • @corinnefrusciante3706
      @corinnefrusciante3706 Před 5 lety +2

      I think you were thinking millimeters rather than centimetres 😊

  • @kenroman2977
    @kenroman2977 Před 4 lety +2

    I'M A VETERAN AND P RICAN BORN IN NEW YORK AND I LOVE YOU WANDA.

  • @oceandabney3498
    @oceandabney3498 Před 4 lety

    AWESOME

  • @shaylawashington7700
    @shaylawashington7700 Před 2 lety +2

    She straight said" if someone broke in my house and vacuumed, I wouldn't call the police but be conused" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @victorevanssr.5034
    @victorevanssr.5034 Před 3 měsíci

    The eye roll was perfect 😅

  • @freddiemontanez8461
    @freddiemontanez8461 Před 4 lety

    Mksrookies, I agree 💯 with you.

  • @johnmtonga2710
    @johnmtonga2710 Před 4 lety

    Awesome.......

  • @vanessaspencer4940
    @vanessaspencer4940 Před 4 lety +2

    I have watched this so many time,s i still die laughing ,she is too funny

  • @morrighan02
    @morrighan02 Před 5 lety +1

    damn I'm just listening to this and looking at another screen at work, and I keep picturing Sid's granny on stage :))))

  • @Bobsworld76
    @Bobsworld76 Před 12 lety +13

    How about Octo-Mom, the Kardashians, and the cast of Jersey Shore?

  • @vllncor
    @vllncor Před 12 lety +2

    LOLOLOL omg, her shaking her head!
    Love Wanda!

  • @judetarkoh3966
    @judetarkoh3966 Před 4 lety +1

    True dat

  • @brunoandlukas2994
    @brunoandlukas2994 Před 4 lety +2

    Lawd she had me rolling !

  • @SarahLizDoan
    @SarahLizDoan Před 5 lety +23

    Rotflmao....”our brain’s an etcha sketch”

  • @rissaa.7660
    @rissaa.7660 Před 4 lety

    I love Wanda.😊

  • @Orthodadday
    @Orthodadday Před 4 lety

    Wanda gets 5 out of 5 laugh emojis. Love her!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @leejganderson7827
    @leejganderson7827 Před 4 lety +1

    ❤💥❤💥❤💥❤💥
    BEST ADVICE EVER AT THE END OF MY 1ST BLOG OKAY..SIMPLISTIC LIFE STYLE..AND STILL
    ENRICH BY CHILLAXING!!!!
    😀😃☺🌞💥💥🌞💥😃😀☺

  • @JustAroundtheHorizon
    @JustAroundtheHorizon Před 11 lety +4

    hahaha the ending was sooo funny!

  • @yasminplata
    @yasminplata Před 6 lety +61

    She is like the female version of Chris rock

    • @miluxor2541
      @miluxor2541 Před 4 lety +6

      nah fam, Chris Rock is the male Wanda Sykes

    • @FC-hj9ub
      @FC-hj9ub Před 4 lety +1

      Different style. Chris has become too vulgar

  • @louiselasinski7623
    @louiselasinski7623 Před 3 lety

    Wanda is the best

  • @IceMetalPunk
    @IceMetalPunk Před 11 lety +18

    "Gimme a pint" sounds much better than "gimme a half a litre" XD

    • @fivecitydirttracker4776
      @fivecitydirttracker4776 Před 4 lety

      🍺🍺 cheers

    • @mikkos8636
      @mikkos8636 Před 4 lety +2

      Yea but you have to remember all the stupid names for each kinda measurement. With metric system you got one unit per type, don't have to remember and convert all shit for nothing and can focus on what really matters. I mean... imagine if you had to do more of that fucking conversion than you have now, and had more of those different units for each type. You'd go balls crazy for trying to learn all that and then apply it, just making things hard for yourself for nothing.

  • @velocitygirl8551
    @velocitygirl8551 Před 4 lety

    I love her

  • @annamcmillan2996
    @annamcmillan2996 Před 4 lety

    Loved "our brain is just a big tech a sketch". So true in our education system today.

  • @007dredger
    @007dredger Před 5 lety +2

    Hmmm!!, Jim Gaffigan used the same grape and grapefruit size tumor joke on his recent special, after Wanda Sykes originally used it on her much earlier show!!

  • @melodysanger103
    @melodysanger103 Před 4 lety

    HAPPY 56TH BIRTHDAY
    WANDA SYKES
    (MARCH 7, 2020)

  • @SoTypicallyMeh
    @SoTypicallyMeh Před 4 lety +2

    Holy fuck. I forgot about Octomom. Damn. America's come up with SO MUCH MORE heinous shit than Octomom since this special came on.

  • @quenzmo
    @quenzmo Před 11 lety +3

    We officially went metric in the 60s and 70s but the good old British public can be very stubborn and used imperial for ages. Food sellers etc were forced to go metric years ago, & at the doctor for eg you will be weighed in kgs and measured in cms, but most people, esp older generation ask for a conversion as it is not meaningful to them.
    You can still buy a pint in a pub.

  • @Mitch6697
    @Mitch6697 Před 5 lety +16

    I grew up with the metric system but I live in Canada 😂

  • @lauradewhurst2860
    @lauradewhurst2860 Před 11 měsíci

    Still hilarious!!! ❤❤

  • @MsDgarrick
    @MsDgarrick Před 11 lety +1

    Yu speak the truth..speak it sister

  • @ailanieva6895
    @ailanieva6895 Před 4 lety +1

    She soooo funny always making me laugh

  • @adeleadams8718
    @adeleadams8718 Před 3 lety

    Wanda pleeeeeese come to England

  • @russellgilbert3453
    @russellgilbert3453 Před 4 lety

    Wanda for President!

  • @BlackTransGuyParis
    @BlackTransGuyParis Před 11 lety +3

    in France too ah ah :)

  • @mokshalovely
    @mokshalovely Před 13 lety

    in Canada, we use centimetres! awww :)

  • @YamiFunny209
    @YamiFunny209 Před 12 lety

    Wanda Sykes for President!!!

  • @kellyyork3898
    @kellyyork3898 Před 2 lety +1

    Truth...and so funny.

  • @2centsfreelancer
    @2centsfreelancer Před 5 lety +3

    😂😂😂😂😂 Wanda funny af

  • @maryrosekent8223
    @maryrosekent8223 Před 4 lety +1

    She is the funniest person on the planet! 🌎🌍🌏

  • @breezy9297
    @breezy9297 Před 4 lety

    Who did the octomom joke first? Wanda or Kathleen Madigan?

  • @rctfanatic
    @rctfanatic Před 12 lety

    @AOG93 Also, engineers worldwide.

  • @hillshepherd9444
    @hillshepherd9444 Před 6 lety

    you're done lady !!

  • @CyanFairyWren
    @CyanFairyWren Před 12 lety

    Poor Canadians X3
    I still love you guys~~~

  • @bettyhouk8727
    @bettyhouk8727 Před 5 lety

    Our. Education system is a deduction system of masses (Lower classes) As for Octo Mom right or wrong her choice to have 8 babies all at the same time ! This is America home of freedom of speech, freedom of choice, freedom of religion ! Home of the Brave ! And a Light unto the world for change and Elvis and hot dogs 🌭 Rock on Baby ! Love your sense of humor Ms Wanda Sykes !

  • @patricemariegirl
    @patricemariegirl Před 12 lety +2

    Hella funny can't stop laughing

  • @armandoruiz8963
    @armandoruiz8963 Před 10 měsíci

    She is absolutely hilarious 😎😎😎

  • @blaq_betty
    @blaq_betty Před 4 lety

    facts

  • @leejganderson7827
    @leejganderson7827 Před 4 lety +1

    A size of a kumquat..huh....
    That little orange right!!!!!?????
    🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉🥉

  • @johdorada
    @johdorada Před 13 lety

    @adalon1202 thanks

  • @MrDiablo720
    @MrDiablo720 Před 5 lety

    Halos are grapefruit in size, however not in multitude...?

  • @Jhon5200
    @Jhon5200 Před 11 lety +3

    in India and most of the World too! :P grapefruit lmao! :D

  • @VexonCross
    @VexonCross Před 12 lety +1

    9 cm is just under 4 inches, for those who are confused.

  • @epdlp4506
    @epdlp4506 Před 4 lety

    The rest of the world is on the metric system and we are still in the old system aka English or imperial system. We have not changed since the American Revolution. Also Canada, Australia and New Zealand have the same problem.

    • @MmCelliste
      @MmCelliste Před 3 lety

      NZ and Australia have used the metric system for...some time...

    • @epdlp4506
      @epdlp4506 Před 3 lety

      @@MmCelliste I did not know. Thank you

  • @deadlycrma
    @deadlycrma Před 12 lety

    2:37 SOOO TRU!!! HAHAHA

  • @Honest000w
    @Honest000w Před 4 lety +1

    I always thought Wanda was funny 😁

  • @adalon1202
    @adalon1202 Před 13 lety

    @johdorada For Octo-mom

  • @TheKorfish
    @TheKorfish Před 7 lety +28

    breaking into someone's house to clean that's a methhead.

  • @Vaeril
    @Vaeril Před 11 lety +1

    Okay, my bad. So you use both systems? I hope I don't come across as too rude, but it just seems odd to me to use two systems simultaneously. In any case, I'm only clowning around anyway. It's not like anybody's day has ever been ruined by having to convert a few inch or foot measurements into centimeters. :)

  • @jenstarling
    @jenstarling Před 3 lety

    “If somebody broke into my house and vacuumed...”
    Right???

  • @americasblackobsession8709

    There's a few Americans I would to trade out...lmao

  • @EmberHarrington
    @EmberHarrington Před 5 lety +1

    I LOOOOVEEE WANDA😊😀😙😀