Besides the personal failure of these two believers , it's also a failure of the local church or ministry to which they belonged. It would be best if they approached their church and were guided from there on. Parental support may not come but the church and its members have to shut up their whispers and murmurs. They have to collectively stand together in prayer and wise Godly counsel to uplift these two.
Biren Singh yea absolutely. The hardest thing when I went through trials is when my church either judges me for not being godly enough to choose Christ at all times, or straightly tell me what God wants me to do without listening to me. It’s not that Im ungrateful to have a church that thrives for Christ and challenges people to grow, but that I wished my fellowship could feel more like brothers and sisters who know me and want to know me (that horizontal connection), than professors for Christ-like 101. Two months ago I went in a deep spiritual struggle on top of working two jobs taking seven classes in college and traveling frequently, so I couldn’t attend church as much (and I eventually realized my life priority was false and did what was necessary to prioritize church). Over those days no one reached out to me to ask how I was doing despite them knowing i have a huge mess going on in my life. I thought people just didn’t notice and I didn’t mind that. But two days ago I heard from my friends that people are talking behind me abt how much I haven’t been serving and maybe my fruit of being a Christian was but for a moment. That really hurt. People chose to have no time to text me a “how can i pray for u”, but they had time discussing abt my salvation.
@@kittylover4974 you know sister , we serve a Holy God being represented by men and women who are in flesh in sin. It's a pity many turn away from faith by seeing the hypocrisy of believers. Looking at someone who fell should ignite the passion of prayer for them in everyone in the church.
Good news is we have a God who is always faithful. Look to God and God alone and keep asking God for more revelations for your life. He is a faithful Father ever compassionate to our needs. One thing which despite a lack of time I may suggest is a daily personal time with God. Even if it is for 15-20 mins. Open your heart to God in that time.
Ha, bad reasoning. I could equally say, " I was in a situation like this once, but that's why God wants us to take the pill before marriage". Its only good due to the supposed economic comfort and maturation that is assumed to come with marriage. Marriage is just a symbol. And a new symbol at that. Even hundreds of years after biblical times, marriages werent for love, but were for economic stability by merging two families. The moral is, just make sure its the right time to bring a kid into this world. Otherwise, the kid along with the parents are going to have a hard time.
To William. Listen to Pastor John 100%! You are standing up as a true man. Stay strong!!! If you if need pray please PM me and I will stop what I’m doing and pray for you when ever it is. You can call, text, email or PM. I’m praying for you brother. God bless you. 💪🏻🙏🏻❤️
I would like to hear the pastor's advice. I had a similar situation, my girlfriend got pregnant when we where only 4 months of dating. I went to live with her for a year, because I wanted to help her in all this process. My daughter was born and I was still living with her and my daughter, but suddenly I started feelling I didn't love her the way to get married to her, so I decided to leave. I went back to my parents house, I haven't stopped supporting my daughter, I go visit her 3 times a week and bring her once a week to my parents house. I feel very bad of being in this situation and I don't know if the correct thing is to restore my relationship with my ex-girlfriend, and slowly build up things only as boyfriend and girlfriend, not living together or any other thing that is more marriage like, to see if it works or not. Or to stay this way, and next time I enter a new relationship, do things more wisely, never permit this type of things happen, and build things slowly to see if things work before getting into more serious stages. The only problem in this is that I don't feel attracted anymore to my girlfriend, neither I feel a strong love for her. It wasn't hard for me to end the relationship, and it didn't hurt me much, what really hurt me was thinking about my daughter and how her life in the future would be. What would you recommend me on doing, I am a Christian and love God, and want to do something righteous and good, even though this situation is very painful and has had me struggling for various months
I have to say that being in love or emotional in a relationship it's not all and it's not necessary to enjoy it with gratitude to God, pray to God and ask for His guidance.
I would recommend for God to show you the way, whatever way it is. I would just suggest to be in your daughter life as much as you can, and work to be on good terms with the mother, even if you don’t have feelings towards her.
Feelings can change after a child. Feelings are subjective. Pray for discernment.. you aren’t supposed to abandon unless you are asked to leave. I think they both need you. Personally I believe the reason why marriage is meant to come before a child is because of that change of feelings that can happen especially in the early stages when dating happens less.
According to Paul we’re not under the law of Moses (Romans 6:14) but I thought Pastor John would have mentioned it... “If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.” Deuteronomy 22:28-29 KJV
That passage does not mean we should necessarily throw out the judicial law of Israel. It serves an excellent (the best actually because it was designed by God) model for the way a government and nation should function. The passage you referenced in Deuteronomy is not a moral commandment but a judicial and legal commandment. Paul was saying that we are not held accountable to the perfect standard set by the law(moral) due to the justification of Christ.
Knowing that it takes ~3 months for Pastor John to get around to answering some of the inboxed questions, I hope this man got this wise counsel in time to make a well-informed decision.
Wait, so he doesn’t even know if his girlfriend truly is pregnant? Either way, he should not rush into a relationship, particularly marriage, if he does not truly love her.
No, he has to take responsibility for his actions. Love is not a feeling but a commitment. He must choose to love and cherish her everyday for the rest of his life, because he has to take responsibility.
We are not to condemn but help those who are weak. Set your paths straight with the Lord and know that you will recover from this. The fact that he is downcast implies a repentant heart. God is Love and choose to be holy.
Or it could be one that is upset over his consequences not his actions. But I do pray that He is repentant. And I praise God that He is the Redeemer of all things that when we turn to him and repent He will never cast us aside!
It really just depends on what you can do to put God first. It would be wrong to assume you live in a state that isn't pagan or that she is a christian or that your impact on the child's life will be a work of holiness in every circumstance. Ideally she is and it would be but that doesn't mean it can and if it can't then I don't think it is right to cost anything of Christ and there should be more to gain in Him in life. But that doesn't mean there is with her if you're sure there isn't. There are a lot of factors involved and john is right that it should be the case. She could have a generally evil horrible family that wants to be overly involved with raising the child and that shouldn't be the case ever but that isn't what the case always is. Especially given how some women and their families are these days, like Blasey Ford and Hillary.. and there attempted covert cession from the Union with Christ notwithstanding the Constitution as in the Constitution (as in the Articles of Confederacy) that this is all above all to the end of the Kingdom of Our Lord Jesus Christ. So you have to understand that if it were never the case then it would be a vulnerability not to learn unless it were secured never to be absolutely always, but all to much it is and it never should be and shall not be the case by that merit that it is not a vulnerability that it isn't ever the case. Just like it should never be the case that the church doesn't want people to be better christians even if they are poor and underprivileged and thereby society, for Christ should never be imposing a necessity or push people in the direction of not being Christian and so it should be the case that there is more in being Christian, but that people's motives are not genuine as wanting to be Christian and that they just want more. This brings up suffering and how there is suffering and that this life is not fun, which brings us back to the child. You should never not want to follow through with the raising and life of the child as a matter of convenience or wealth and that is very much unchristian and abortion is murder in most cases although it may not be if both the mother and the child are in danger of dying. If she was going to die and the child be healthy and live i think it should not be an option. I would even go as far as to say that knowing there is a 50% chance the child be healthy and she die then her on artificial life support is a better option and also that the child should not be indebted to the medical cost nor should you. And that she should agree to it even as a wife in marriage and you shouldn't as her husband which under the law means that you should not have to pay for her agreement upon finding out that she has decided to your indebtedness. That doesn't mean I'm happy or think it's fair that you're having a child for sin while I've been waiting most of my life to marry and have kids and turn thirty in under three weeks, which is more favorable with God but also less not on my part, and I don't need a litch, but life shouldn't cost anything and should benefit the Lord's Kingdom.
Nathan Genesee it's not undoing it, it's still been done. All you're doing is forcing the woman to miscarry or come on to her period early. It isn't *poof* and it's all gone.
Nathan Genesee no, I don't think you understand how it works. The woman has contractions and period-like symptoms to break down the uterine lining to flush everything out so that she doesn't become impregnated/egg is destroyed if it is impregnated. It is the same as a miscarriage, which, if you miscarry at like 4-6 weeks, can feel like a really bad period. You're making it sound simple, when it isn't. You're electively making the decision to destroy something that is composed of you and the person you love (or should love, since you're having sex with them). It is very disrespectful.
@@ayupwhatsthis8339 Symptoms are real, and so is the ability to undo. Undo is simplified, yes, but you don't have to be pregnant if you don't want to be. I fail to see where your insertion of, "it is disrespectful"/"should love" is anything but speculative and subjective.
Why does this have to be the end of the world? Why not own it and get married? I know - it can't work out that way in every situation. But that baby deserves parents who step up - not some coward who cries about "sin" and runs away.
I don´t like how you criticize the fact that they sinned "terribly" by having sex. Of course, the right thing to do now is not to have an abortion. But they didn´t do any serious sin by having sex. You speak to him as if he did I don´t know what. What is important to adress is his huge fear. That is the cause of his thought of abortion. But he wrote to you because he doesn´t want to have it, because his conscience tells him it is wrong, and that is good and worth only supporting him.
@@Dairunt1 Ok, well, you're incorrect about the whole, "God will restore thing". That's crap, but i agree with your premise - that the kid is better off with one good parent in this situation. The reality is, kids dont need role models of race or gender, they need role models of character. Yes, perhaps it would be easiest for a MAN to be strong and a woman to be gentle. But cut the crap Christianity with the supposed concretedness to gender roles. Whatever youre good at, marry someone who can be good at the things youre not. This is not dependent on GENDER. This is dependent of character - which is why many people find perfect mates of the same gender, even.
The Lent Maybe a good thing a little later, but sober judgement is the key here. Right now emotions are high and people dont't know. First establish honestly, transperency, sober judgement, wisdom via local church community, than after things are secure and know, maybe marriage is a good move or not, up to their wisdom depending on the circumstances.
What ever happened to, "It takes a whole village to raise one child"? We see ourselves as creatures who marry for life and who are meant for only 1 other person. This is ignorant. There are plenty of people out there who are going to be better for your child at something than you are.
@@ayupwhatsthis8339 ? You don't understand what I said. Many people will be better at something, the villiage, the people in it, those people can help. This idea that only 1 man and 1 woman shoukd raise a kid is stupid
Nathan Genesee no one is saying people out side of the nuclear family can't help raise a kid, but it is statistically proven that children fair better in the nuclear family (married mother and father) than they do without.
+Nathan Genesee Nothing about that quote is Biblical; that's called communism. Is that what you tell yourself to justify your kid being raised by daycare and the public school system?
@@matthewtube7 ? Hahaha, what? No.. I'm not arguing to ignore my child, that I do not have btw. I'm arguing to say, sure the nuclear family is likely to produce better results than a broken one. This is obvious. But just imagine the possibilities outside of this dichotomy.
What a tough situation. Praying for peace, healing, and restoration over the man and woman. Great advice Pastor John.
Praise God for the wisdom that He gave you, Pastor John! Great advice.
The pregnancy isn’t the sin. Man up and support the woman and child
Yes
Man up and Woman up and take care the child . It takes 2 to make A baby . Not 1
Thank you for being humble aa you edify others in word of knowledge and wisdom. God bless you Mr.Piper! God be glorifed! Thank you pastor!
Hi ashley i think i've fallen inlove.
Besides the personal failure of these two believers , it's also a failure of the local church or ministry to which they belonged. It would be best if they approached their church and were guided from there on. Parental support may not come but the church and its members have to shut up their whispers and murmurs. They have to collectively stand together in prayer and wise Godly counsel to uplift these two.
Biren Singh yea absolutely. The hardest thing when I went through trials is when my church either judges me for not being godly enough to choose Christ at all times, or straightly tell me what God wants me to do without listening to me. It’s not that Im ungrateful to have a church that thrives for Christ and challenges people to grow, but that I wished my fellowship could feel more like brothers and sisters who know me and want to know me (that horizontal connection), than professors for Christ-like 101. Two months ago I went in a deep spiritual struggle on top of working two jobs taking seven classes in college and traveling frequently, so I couldn’t attend church as much (and I eventually realized my life priority was false and did what was necessary to prioritize church). Over those days no one reached out to me to ask how I was doing despite them knowing i have a huge mess going on in my life. I thought people just didn’t notice and I didn’t mind that. But two days ago I heard from my friends that people are talking behind me abt how much I haven’t been serving and maybe my fruit of being a Christian was but for a moment. That really hurt. People chose to have no time to text me a “how can i pray for u”, but they had time discussing abt my salvation.
@@kittylover4974 you know sister , we serve a Holy God being represented by men and women who are in flesh in sin. It's a pity many turn away from faith by seeing the hypocrisy of believers. Looking at someone who fell should ignite the passion of prayer for them in everyone in the church.
Good news is we have a God who is always faithful. Look to God and God alone and keep asking God for more revelations for your life. He is a faithful Father ever compassionate to our needs. One thing which despite a lack of time I may suggest is a daily personal time with God. Even if it is for 15-20 mins. Open your heart to God in that time.
I was in a situation like this but she wasn't pregnant its not easy to deal with thats why God wants us to wait until marriage until sex to avoid this
Ha, bad reasoning.
I could equally say,
" I was in a situation like this once, but that's why God wants us to take the pill before marriage".
Its only good due to the supposed economic comfort and maturation that is assumed to come with marriage.
Marriage is just a symbol. And a new symbol at that. Even hundreds of years after biblical times, marriages werent for love, but were for economic stability by merging two families.
The moral is, just make sure its the right time to bring a kid into this world. Otherwise, the kid along with the parents are going to have a hard time.
This was good.
What episode was that one mentioned at the beginning?
To William. Listen to Pastor John 100%! You are standing up as a true man. Stay strong!!! If you if need pray please PM me and I will stop what I’m doing and pray for you when ever it is. You can call, text, email or PM. I’m praying for you brother. God bless you. 💪🏻🙏🏻❤️
Most would rush into marriage which is not good always
Yeah that would be a silly way to be married
Be a father .I sure knew what the hell I was going to do when I made my lady big in the belly.Be a Man.
I would like to hear the pastor's advice. I had a similar situation, my girlfriend got pregnant when we where only 4 months of dating. I went to live with her for a year, because I wanted to help her in all this process. My daughter was born and I was still living with her and my daughter, but suddenly I started feelling I didn't love her the way to get married to her, so I decided to leave. I went back to my parents house, I haven't stopped supporting my daughter, I go visit her 3 times a week and bring her once a week to my parents house. I feel very bad of being in this situation and I don't know if the correct thing is to restore my relationship with my ex-girlfriend, and slowly build up things only as boyfriend and girlfriend, not living together or any other thing that is more marriage like, to see if it works or not. Or to stay this way, and next time I enter a new relationship, do things more wisely, never permit this type of things happen, and build things slowly to see if things work before getting into more serious stages. The only problem in this is that I don't feel attracted anymore to my girlfriend, neither I feel a strong love for her. It wasn't hard for me to end the relationship, and it didn't hurt me much, what really hurt me was thinking about my daughter and how her life in the future would be. What would you recommend me on doing, I am a Christian and love God, and want to do something righteous and good, even though this situation is very painful and has had me struggling for various months
I have to say that being in love or emotional in a relationship it's not all and it's not necessary to enjoy it with gratitude to God, pray to God and ask for His guidance.
I would recommend for God to show you the way, whatever way it is. I would just suggest to be in your daughter life as much as you can, and work to be on good terms with the mother, even if you don’t have feelings towards her.
Feelings can change after a child. Feelings are subjective. Pray for discernment.. you aren’t supposed to abandon unless you are asked to leave. I think they both need you. Personally I believe the reason why marriage is meant to come before a child is because of that change of feelings that can happen especially in the early stages when dating happens less.
According to Paul we’re not under the law of Moses (Romans 6:14) but I thought Pastor John would have mentioned it...
“If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.”
Deuteronomy 22:28-29 KJV
That passage does not mean we should necessarily throw out the judicial law of Israel. It serves an excellent (the best actually because it was designed by God) model for the way a government and nation should function. The passage you referenced in Deuteronomy is not a moral commandment but a judicial and legal commandment. Paul was saying that we are not held accountable to the perfect standard set by the law(moral) due to the justification of Christ.
That was a manly and wise response. I can respect this.
Amen!
Knowing that it takes ~3 months for Pastor John to get around to answering some of the inboxed questions, I hope this man got this wise counsel in time to make a well-informed decision.
Wait, so he doesn’t even know if his girlfriend truly is pregnant? Either way, he should not rush into a relationship, particularly marriage, if he does not truly love her.
No, he has to take responsibility for his actions. Love is not a feeling but a commitment. He must choose to love and cherish her everyday for the rest of his life, because he has to take responsibility.
AMEN
We are not to condemn but help those who are weak. Set your paths straight with the Lord and know that you will recover from this. The fact that he is downcast implies a repentant heart. God is Love and choose to be holy.
Or it could be one that is upset over his consequences not his actions. But I do pray that He is repentant. And I praise God that He is the Redeemer of all things that when we turn to him and repent He will never cast us aside!
Thank you. I'll call my parents tomorrow.
Brasil here, estou tentando entender, parece muito interessante, mas meu inglês tá péssimo kkkk
😢😭
It really just depends on what you can do to put God first. It would be wrong to assume you live in a state that isn't pagan or that she is a christian or that your impact on the child's life will be a work of holiness in every circumstance. Ideally she is and it would be but that doesn't mean it can and if it can't then I don't think it is right to cost anything of Christ and there should be more to gain in Him in life. But that doesn't mean there is with her if you're sure there isn't. There are a lot of factors involved and john is right that it should be the case. She could have a generally evil horrible family that wants to be overly involved with raising the child and that shouldn't be the case ever but that isn't what the case always is. Especially given how some women and their families are these days, like Blasey Ford and Hillary.. and there attempted covert cession from the Union with Christ notwithstanding the Constitution as in the Constitution (as in the Articles of Confederacy) that this is all above all to the end of the Kingdom of Our Lord Jesus Christ. So you have to understand that if it were never the case then it would be a vulnerability not to learn unless it were secured never to be absolutely always, but all to much it is and it never should be and shall not be the case by that merit that it is not a vulnerability that it isn't ever the case. Just like it should never be the case that the church doesn't want people to be better christians even if they are poor and underprivileged and thereby society, for Christ should never be imposing a necessity or push people in the direction of not being Christian and so it should be the case that there is more in being Christian, but that people's motives are not genuine as wanting to be Christian and that they just want more. This brings up suffering and how there is suffering and that this life is not fun, which brings us back to the child. You should never not want to follow through with the raising and life of the child as a matter of convenience or wealth and that is very much unchristian and abortion is murder in most cases although it may not be if both the mother and the child are in danger of dying. If she was going to die and the child be healthy and live i think it should not be an option. I would even go as far as to say that knowing there is a 50% chance the child be healthy and she die then her on artificial life support is a better option and also that the child should not be indebted to the medical cost nor should you. And that she should agree to it even as a wife in marriage and you shouldn't as her husband which under the law means that you should not have to pay for her agreement upon finding out that she has decided to your indebtedness. That doesn't mean I'm happy or think it's fair that you're having a child for sin while I've been waiting most of my life to marry and have kids and turn thirty in under three weeks, which is more favorable with God but also less not on my part, and I don't need a litch, but life shouldn't cost anything and should benefit the Lord's Kingdom.
I am now engaged into a unmarried man who had a one child with his ex gf. Should i pursue our marriage? Will i commit a sin if i marry him?
so what if one is a believer and one is not, but the woman is pregnant? wouldn't marriage be wrong because one is an unbeliever?
The previous podcast addresses this question.
Get married, preferably before the baby is born. You can't undo what has been done. Marry and raise him/her together.
Haha, you can undo it, just like how you undo the semen by taking birth control. Just take the pill, and it's, "undone"
Nathan Genesee it's not undoing it, it's still been done. All you're doing is forcing the woman to miscarry or come on to her period early. It isn't *poof* and it's all gone.
@@ayupwhatsthis8339
I don't think u understand how the emergency contraceptive pill works. It's fullproof, and if not, there are other methods
Nathan Genesee no, I don't think you understand how it works. The woman has contractions and period-like symptoms to break down the uterine lining to flush everything out so that she doesn't become impregnated/egg is destroyed if it is impregnated. It is the same as a miscarriage, which, if you miscarry at like 4-6 weeks, can feel like a really bad period.
You're making it sound simple, when it isn't. You're electively making the decision to destroy something that is composed of you and the person you love (or should love, since you're having sex with them). It is very disrespectful.
@@ayupwhatsthis8339
Symptoms are real, and so is the ability to undo. Undo is simplified, yes, but you don't have to be pregnant if you don't want to be.
I fail to see where your insertion of, "it is disrespectful"/"should love" is anything but speculative and subjective.
Why does this have to be the end of the world? Why not own it and get married?
I know - it can't work out that way in every situation. But that baby deserves parents who step up - not some coward who cries about "sin" and runs away.
🧍♂️
I don´t like how you criticize the fact that they sinned "terribly" by having sex. Of course, the right thing to do now is not to have an abortion. But they didn´t do any serious sin by having sex. You speak to him as if he did I don´t know what. What is important to adress is his huge fear. That is the cause of his thought of abortion. But he wrote to you because he doesn´t want to have it, because his conscience tells him it is wrong, and that is good and worth only supporting him.
Doesn’t make any sense to bring a child niether the parent’s ready to have. God give us brain to think we should use it
Do what's right for you William.
its evil act o my God we living in end to the world
DNA test. Id get married *but with a prenup. Otherwise its child support AND financial ruin when she leaves you.
Marriage.
Yup
@@Dairunt1
Ok, well, you're incorrect about the whole, "God will restore thing". That's crap, but i agree with your premise - that the kid is better off with one good parent in this situation.
The reality is, kids dont need role models of race or gender, they need role models of character. Yes, perhaps it would be easiest for a MAN to be strong and a woman to be gentle. But cut the crap Christianity with the supposed concretedness to gender roles.
Whatever youre good at, marry someone who can be good at the things youre not. This is not dependent on GENDER. This is dependent of character - which is why many people find perfect mates of the same gender, even.
@@Dairunt1
Yeah, went a little overboard. But the bible is the one with the presumptions about gender roles. Figured youd agree, but guess not
The Lent Maybe a good thing a little later, but sober judgement is the key here. Right now emotions are high and people dont't know. First establish honestly, transperency, sober judgement, wisdom via local church community, than after things are secure and know, maybe marriage is a good move or not, up to their wisdom depending on the circumstances.
@@lighthousenetwork.tv-media I hear you opinion and understand it.
*LeAvE*
What ever happened to, "It takes a whole village to raise one child"?
We see ourselves as creatures who marry for life and who are meant for only 1 other person.
This is ignorant.
There are plenty of people out there who are going to be better for your child at something than you are.
You're always going to think you can do better for your kid, but it doesn't mean you should give the kid up to be raised by other people.
@@ayupwhatsthis8339
? You don't understand what I said.
Many people will be better at something, the villiage, the people in it, those people can help. This idea that only 1 man and 1 woman shoukd raise a kid is stupid
Nathan Genesee no one is saying people out side of the nuclear family can't help raise a kid, but it is statistically proven that children fair better in the nuclear family (married mother and father) than they do without.
+Nathan Genesee Nothing about that quote is Biblical; that's called communism. Is that what you tell yourself to justify your kid being raised by daycare and the public school system?
@@matthewtube7
? Hahaha, what? No.. I'm not arguing to ignore my child, that I do not have btw. I'm arguing to say, sure the nuclear family is likely to produce better results than a broken one. This is obvious. But just imagine the possibilities outside of this dichotomy.
My Girlfriend Is Pregnant - What Do I Do Next? ... _blame Pastor John._
First of all we all suffer because God wants you to improve. Forgiveness lets God discipline you instead of punishment
I believe this is a joke comment