Episode 07: Why do I keep doing this? Breaking Free from Coping Mechanisms

A coping mechanism is a strategy or behavior that people use to deal with stress, pain, or difficult emotions. It helps them manage or avoid feelings that are uncomfortable or overwhelming. These can show up as addictions, overworking, or distractions that keep us from facing our true emotions, especially the ones we’d rather not feel.
This is how we get into never-ending cycles and patterns in our lives, wondering why the same situations happen over and over again when what we truly want is a resolution and a different outcome.
Understanding the different parts of ourselves that keep these cycles going is crucial. These parts, like the achiever, the victim, or the protector, all have one goal - to shield us from painful feelings. But here's the catch: avoiding those feelings means we never truly heal. We just keep relying on coping mechanisms that block us from accessing, acknowledging, and transforming our pain.
So, let's make it a habit to constantly question why certain patterns exist and what we're hiding from. What don't we want to feel?
Finding a balance between protecting ourselves and staying open to new experiences and relationships is key. This means recognizing and addressing the walls we've built from past traumas, allowing those hidden parts of us to finally be seen and heard.
In this episode, Ivana also shares a personal experience of traveling to Arizona alone to confront personal limitations, putting herself in situations that would normally trigger loneliness, to actually face those uncomfortable feelings.