HEALTH AND SAFETY SCARE FILMS Volume 6

Just when you think you’ve got enough to worry about, here comes Health and Safety Vol 6 to provide you with additional horrors to drive you crazy. Such as:
HOW TO AVOID MUSCLE STRAINS (color): Cheerful music and cutesy animation tell us all about muscles, bones, "body levers," and why things hurt, with a delightful emphasis on hernias and groin injuries. Best way to avoid muscle strain: don’t move!
SNIFFLES AND SNEEZES (b&w): All your fears about germs are gleefully summed up with this hypochondriac classic in which deadly diseases are waiting to attack you from door knobs, borrowed pencils, and the very air you breathe! After discussing icky things like mucus, cilia, and eustachian tubes, the film goes right to the jugular by showing Eisenhower-era high school kids blindly infecting one another with cootie-filled saliva which is shown as Ghastly Black Blotches that appear on their hands after they rub their noses or sneeze into their palms. And those same Ghastly Black Blotches then appear on everything they touch - such as the seemingly innocent pages of a library book or the shiny white plates you’ll be eating dinner on - which, of course, will become your Ghastly Black Blotches the moment you touch them too! Ahh-choooo!
BABYSITTER'S GUIDE (color): "The babysitting business is booming," says the most hilariously monotone narrator in film history, and with it comes the promise of instant danger and death in this classic scare-a-thon from SID DAVIS, the Master of Teenage Doom. Since the very act of babysitting will automatically jeopardize your life, follow these helpful hints: fill out "your babysitting information sheet"; lock all windows and doors; bring flashlights; "if you received a suspicious phone call," notify the police immediately; "when babysitting out of doors, avoid conversations with strangers and never accept a ride"; write down the license of suspicious cars; and when the inevitable fire breaks out, run for your life, then call the Fire Department. Remember, "knowing how to avoid dangerous situations will add to your poise and confidence!"
THE PATIENT IS A PERSON (b&w): Contrasts cheerfully scary nurses with terrified, hospital-hating patients exemplified by cowardly country-fair "thrill driver" Lew Miller. Best moment: the nurse who throws a newspaper in a patient’s face.
FALLOUT: WHEN AND HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF AGAINST IT (b&w): Basically, in case of atomic attack, stay indoors and keep away from windows.
SAFETY IN THE HOME (b&w): Aware that "every 6 seconds" someone is hurt or killed in a home accident the most anal family in the U.S. tiptoes around their death-trap of a house trying in vain to safety-proof it when - Oh no! Dad carelessly steps over the "safety zone" outlined on the floor around the stove and burns himself. And, folks, if this can happen to one of these safety-obsessed fools, surely death and dismemberment await the rest of us.
ANOTHER MAN'S FAMILY (color): A typical all-American family - a mom, dad, brother & sis, who look like they could’ve stepped out of any TV show of the period - don’t pay attention to fire safety... and are all burned to death. Yup! The sofa catches on fire from one of Dad’s cigarettes and the whole house is torched. Last shot: the family dog sitting in the rubble next to a doll and "crying." Douse this in water after viewing.

[@PlasmaCoolantLeak]

Another way to detect fallout is when you hear creepy-sounding music.

[@bobsmith284]

1:41:25 The dog got the last laugh.

[@petescare13]

First comment.
Mr. Davis flips his wife and family the bird at 1:16:56
Intentional inside joke or directorial fail?
LMFAO