What Animals Could I Beat In A Fight?
Vložit
- čas přidán 20. 04. 2024
- ☆Socials:
➥ Gaming Channel: / @joebartgames
➥ Vod Channel: / @joebartvod
➥Twitch: / joe_bartolozzi
➥Instagram: joe.bartolo...
➥TikTok:www.tiktok.com/@joe.bartolozz...
➥Twitter: joebartolozzi_?la...
Editor: @Jdyo
☆Discord:
➥ / discord
Outro Song: @PlayaPhonkOfficial • SHOOTING STARS - Zábava
Poison: Bite it, you die
Venom: It bites you, you die
not all the time
@@uncanny4038 uh yeah that’s the definitions
@@uncanny4038 yes, die is an exaggeration but it's good to keep in mind
But isn't Venom an alien symbiote he can basically help you to fight all of em🤔?
@@yourstrulyraina not all the time
even though he put it at 0%, if anyone were to try and fight a bear it'd be Joe out of sheer confidence
According to Joe it helps if it's hairless
@@chubbycheeks593 I mean it’d make it harder to like grab on to it
@@Phantomxvzsay pause or else your gay 🏳️🌈
No
@@mehb0ss73yes he would
Not the Chat screaming *GYATTTT!!* while joe Flexing💀
fr
This new generation is f**ed
When it was i only edged 🤫
Shut up
can you blame them?
Orangutan being lower than 0% is insane. They could tear people apart out of curiosity.
The people weren’t Joe
@@CasualCat64 it doesn't matter you give joe a machete and he would get absolutly bodied by an orangutan
@CasualCat64 yeah Joe can take it. Even though they are almost as brutal as gorilla's.
There has never been a documented attack by sn orangutan in the wild Like ever. And in captivity there were still very few attacks and the injuries weren't bad. You may be thinking of chimps
@@AxlSharp Ok? Theyre naturally not aggressive toward humans but that is not what this video is about. Theyre 5+ times stronger than humans, and documented fights with them has not ended up with the human winning
33:58 it won a war against the Australian military, and the Australian military called it better, stronger, and faster than a tank. The emus took multiple bullets and still ran at full speed.
I would bet my life he would destroy a emu please tell me how an emu could kill plz tell me
You know it has sharper claws and sharper beck than a ostriches
He can still beat it bird bones are vulnerable to blunt attacks like kicks and punches if he breaks a limb which isn’t hard it’s over.
@@brandonmorrison5158 can kill a person through evisceration if it corners them and kicks with its big three-toed feet. The toe claws of emus are capable of inflicting serious injuries or even death under the right conditions. Reports of injuries from encounters with emus in Australia and other parts of the world are not uncommon, particularly in wild-animal parks, emu farms, and zoos. Emus can dash away at nearly 50 km (30 miles) per hour and kick with their powerful legs when threatened. I think Joe could probably take one but that is how an emu would kill. Now if it were a cassowary Joe is dead as hell.
@@brandonmorrison5158 one kick to your gut would have its foot coming out of your back
joe acting like he wouldn't tear every animal to shreds for the whole video🙏🙏
The bear would tear him open
The crocodile would rip his limbs off
Kangaroos have sharp claws so if you strangle it, it can rip your hands
Joe could toss a goose away
@@lightlingzooma-69 He underestimated kangaroos, they are way stronger than a human is. Not only can their kicks break your fucking ribb cage open, they also can strike you with their tail.
Him silently moving kangaroos from 50% to 20% after the chatter is hilarious 💀🤣
This video tells me Joe has not watched casual geographic
i love casual geo ohemgee
16:30 I just want to mention the difference between a moose and a deer to just show how strong a moose actually is.
What i mean by that is that if there was a deer on the road, its safer to hit it than to try and dodge it, however if a moose is on the road, its safer to dodge it, as driving into a moose has been described as “driving into a brick wall.”
You have a better survival chance if you get hit with a fat man (atomic bomb) than if you hit a moose going like 80 mph
Joe said this in the video but yes exactly
“My odds are better against a wildebeest than a zebra” is crazy
Yep, 0.01% to 0.011% 😂
Not Joe mounting the ostrich like a lynel 💀
Ostrich is a 0 too. Those things are psychos
ostrich's can sometimes kill lions, joe is not winning 💀
@@drk166cap
@@duduberd it’s true in Australia I’ve seen ostriches kill a lion, they are very powerful animals and there ain’t no way he’s winning
@Condorkeysyou just gotta scare the ostrich and if you do(not unlikely), then he'll just put his head into the ground and stay there while u can kill it
Man only took like 2 years to do this, man was edging us 🙏💀
Bro what!?💀
Putting mark and a silverback gorilla in the same category is just not right😭
I can’t stop thinking of how Joe would have a goofy ass family guy fight with these animals
Nobody talking about him dismissing the boar so quickly, but a lot of the time boars manage to kill or at least greatly injure prepared armed men. His ass is not beating a boar once in a hundred times with his bare hands 💀💀
Nah I saw him do it
Joe putting a baboon in the 100% category is crazy
Yo.. i think the octopus is you're twin Joe.. no way!!
3:44 “If I get on and I grip” 😳😨🤤
Brother. An orangutan will tear your face apart. Literally. They aim for the nose, ears and all non fatal areas to cause the most pain before they kill you. Thats with most apes too. They are scary bro.
Joe stop just looking at weight and height u gotta look up how many people they've injured or killed and their bite force. Sorry u have no chance against a hyena or emu😭🙏🏼💀
what nah hed def have a chance against an emu. hyena nah but emu ya fs
@@ChickenNugget-nv2cg, Emus are basically modern day dinosaurs. He has no chance.
Bro forgot that kangaroos have claws that can rip through concrete.
They also forget they’re 7ft tall and built like powerlifters 😂
bruh you not hitting an eagle with a rock when it's dive bombing you xD
I think the mark Zuckerberg one just represents humans.
hey! the person who made the tier list here. Mark represents the lizard family.
🤓
nononononono he's mark MARK Mark Zuckerberg has raised internet eyebrows after revealing he has taken part in an intensive challenge in which he ran a mile, completed 100 pull-ups, 200 press-ups and 300 squats, before running a further mile, all while wearing a 9kg weighted vest.
The only animals Joe could possibly beat is the animals Val.
Bet he’s going to use this tier list as a way to gloat
what gloat💀
@@alessandraperez3081English?
joe was just too focused on the weight class
2:28 everyone in chat started saying *”GYATT”* 💀💀💀💀
I was on the stream, I was one of them 😭🙏
It ok I did it to 😂😂😂
joe: ladybug 0% chance
also joe: wolf, hyena, snake, ostrich, kangaroo 20% chance
Nah the Tasmanian tiger wild kratts episode went hard
This video was actually one of my favorites great job Joe
17:00 fun fact, mose eyes dont reflect light so u cant see them on the road at night thats why so many people hit them and die
"What Joe fails to grasp is the sheer insanity of humanity! Adrenaline, my friend, it's a potent drug. Picture this: a human, fueled by adrenaline, thrust into a life-or-death struggle. It's not just terrifying; it's a glimpse into our primal nature. The strength, the ferocity-it's enough to turn a person into a force of nature, capable of feats that defy belief. Adrenaline transforms us, for better or for worse, into beings of pure instinct, where the line between man and machine blurs."
Animals have adrenaline aswell buddy just completly cancels out that point...
@@thelargegirth473 "Hey buddy, except an animal wouldn't charge at you with missing arms and a chunk taken out of them!"
@@zachwilson6124 Why are you speaking like that??? And yes, some animals absolutely would... While we may go into shock. Adrenaline isn't a fucking superpower.
@@Bane520
"Hey, do you not realize what hysterical strength is? No, it's not some anime power-up. I'm not an idiot, but humans are incredibly strong. Our brains have to impose limits on us, or we could literally break our own bones and tear our muscles by mistake!"
@@zachwilson6124he isn’t disagreeing with you but he’s saying that every other animal also has that shit
Now do "Which horror villains could I beat in a fight"
The crazy thing is him putting the wild boar at 100 percent. He has no idea lol
those Kangaroos can quite literally disembowel with a single kick
Ez parry intelligence diff
One goober acc rolled a 1 and got 1 shotted
Not a single kick. They can be dangerous sure but the "average joe" could fuck them up. Their legs are the only real issue, and I can't imagine they're that hard to outmaneuver. I don't know why people are so heavily overestimating kangaroos.
@@Bane520bluds delusional
@@cloudyskies9897 How?
Yoo Joe love the content stay strong brother stay safe
Fun fact: Platypuses have a spure on their ankle that contain venom and can kill you with 1 sting.
Joe: im gonna be rubbing his neck, im gonna be chokin it
Bro has a 0 % chance against an bald eagle coming at you at 99 mph💀
You wouldn't stand a chance in a hand-to-hand fight with an eagle. Eagles are powerful birds with sharp talons and beaks designed for hunting. Their grip strength is immense, and their agility in the air far surpasses anything a human can achieve. Even if you managed to grab an eagle, it would likely slash or peck you with its beak before you could overpower it.
@@Bryceonsteroidsu can just shatter its bones with ur grip alone
@@Bryceonsteroidsdude their like 1/3 the size of humans
@@Bigbob508 Are you serious dude? Break all the bones in your body in one hit? Eagles are not pragrene falcons,they do not divebomb and if the eagle even tried that, the thing that would be heard from impact would be a splash and the eagle turned unrecognizable even if the human is severely injured afterwards (always depending on the point of contact ofc). At the end of the day,as long as you keep both if your hands in front of your face the eagle can't do anything.
@@Bryceonsteroids You say birds are designed for hunting forgetting humans are literally the top animal at hunting.
Joe is not killing a wolf 😭
Saw the thumbnail and appreciate that we men just universally agree that we CAN defeat a Lion in a fist fight
This man's upload schedule is perfect. Always right before I go take a shower
You guys think Joe still thinks he could beam an eagle dive bombing him with a rock? He’s still not easily beating an eagle tbh. Joe really think he’s a baseball pitcher and could snipe an eagle dive bombing at him with a small rock with ease.
100% Joe is built different
Def not sniping it out of the sky but definitely beating it once you get a hold of it.
It’s 14 pounds he’s winning at least 75% of the time
I give human vs eagle a 50/50, if the eagle is smart it dive bombs while using its talons to tear me apart. If its stupid, it will most likely launch a frontal assault by clawing at my face with its claws while flapping its wings, at which point as long as you tank the damage from the claws, you should be able to get a hold of the bird and end it. But depends on the bird, if it does bird things you gotta get lucky or die
@@EeveetoUmbreon25as if i couldnt weave that mf thats comming from miles away
V good video, very logical thinking too, n good stats that put context to the situation
blessed be thou when joe uploads
bear back-shots is crazy
Fr but what’s with the timestamp?
35:58 a Wildebeest at 20%? Do you know how strong they are, they kill big cats and many other carnivores. That’s an instant 0%
same with hyena and zebra
20 is fair all it takes is a lucky stick shot which is exactly what 20% is
@@CasualCat64no a single lucky stick shot is hurting a wildebeast they would fuck you up
@@CasualCat64 yeah but even 20% is a stretch, maybe like 5%
@@user-sy2gh6vm8v I’d say 5% is an average teens chances with an average adult male fairing a little better at 10% assuming they both have weapons to puncture skin. Joe is 2x that of the average man strength wise.
Getting kicked by a kangaroo is like getting hit by a small car
Love u joe ! Happy 420 w video thank you for making content.
Joe always lookin mad cute bro 😭
wild
@@yazschow
doing a push up for every like this gets 😂😢
Like bait
ur ass wont do a single one 😂😢
Wtf is a push up?
@@Cybrsp6 when you push upwards or smth
Glad you still making content 👍
Hello! Australian here about the kangaroos. I would say if you fought a kangaroo it would be a 50/50 because kangaroos don't enjoy murdering creatures bigger than itself. Unless your fighting a fully grown male (2m tall) the kangaroo is probably going to stay away from you because you appear larger. If it's a fight to the death, you're probably gonna get a 20/80 chance. Kangaroos tails are so strong they can stay up on top of them to kick. Their legs are strong enough to get you on the ground in one kick, and their claws are sharp enough to rip apart your skin in one slash. It really depends what kind of kangaroo you're fighting. If you're fighting fully grown males then you have about a 0% survival chance (to the death). If it's average sized you'd have a 20% and if it's small you'd probably get off with a solid 75. Male kangaroos are very deadly, and are extremely intimidating.
nah the wolf one is valid, there was a big ass german shepherd coming at me and i flipped that mf
..and with large dogs as long as u try to keep ur arteries safe and stay up off the floor you will most likely be able to concuss the dog i would get a rock in this situation so ye
True but wolves tend to be bigger than German shepherds especially the North American ones.
@@johnhilbert9130dawg you not beating no wolf. a wolf would punk a german shepherd. these kids need to stay off the internet
@@lilminty3067 A lot of people are delusional here including the guy that made the video . Wolves can reach 75 kg of mass , have such a strong bite that they can break your bones . Maybe a guy like Brian Shaw has a chance but for most men fighting a wolf is a death sentence .
Joe bart is the goat of streamers 🐐
I've been waiting for this 💀💀
I love Joe’s videos they always make me laugh I’m glad I found his channel ❤
Eating 1 chicken nuggets for every like this gets
Ain’t giving a like then, for your own wellbeing
@@yusufbilmez4839it’s only 19
@@Maka753 for now
Fr, if it’s McDonald’s, that nutrition value would be absolutely bonkers.
92 bud
You’re getting destroyed by an orangutan
Boar at 100% is just Insane
Finally, he has been talking about this tier list for weeks
Under one century gang 👇
Vegan Teacher is not gonna like this one
Luv ur content Joe, hope your doing well and enjoying life ❤ 🙏
Just imagining Joe fighting a shark on land. Yknow just casually pulling up a chair sitting down, putting on some music.
The vegan teacher be like😱😱
Nah, id win
Joe loves the "jump on the back and smack em" strat
80 billion views in 1.0 seconds he fell off
You aint funny lil bro
10 views in 3 seconds fell off
Shut up, you guys are so annoying
@@SleepyLadsincoparatedfrrrr I hate people that say that
@gazerr Agreed like bro it doesn't matter if you think he fell because obviously he didnt
Bro it’s a joke
Super original fr
you can hit a boar with a metal bat, and it'll just get mad, probably 50/50 - 20%
I’m actually crying from laughter 😭😭😂
Day 5 of telling Joe he’s so cute
Actually true
0 views 1 sec Joe fell off
Aren’t you basically the first viewer 🤓👆
You’re so funny aren’t you
This was posted 9 days ago and this is 10 days ago. 😨
@@Isaacyoung123balls
the orang is gonna tear you limb from limb bru they're 7 times stronger that a human you aint beating that 💀
I’ve seen elementary schoolers fight better than those kangaroos 💀
Under 100 Views Gang
⬇
Lets go
If there are over 100 likes on this comment someone has to be lying (it's me)
I’m only under 10 minute gang :(
I was playing fncs fortnite
Under 10,000 Views Gang
Tbh joe could take on all these easily
true that
You wouldn't stand a chance in a hand-to-hand fight with an eagle. Eagles are powerful birds with sharp talons and beaks designed for hunting. Their grip strength is immense, and their agility in the air far surpasses anything a human can achieve. Even if you managed to grab an eagle, it would likely slash or peck you with its beak before you could overpower it.
@@BryceonsteroidsEagle is 50/50
My man; you would run from a determined house cat 😂
I can already tell this will be a good video
0 views in 3 years bro fell off hard
Fr
10000% Joe is beating a kangaroo, outrageous to think otherwise. Their reach is only like 3 inches (pretty average btw)
Their kick can shatter your bones
There kick is destroy your legs
They have and will dodge punches
One of the more reasonable animal vs videos I’ve seen. Bro underestimated the eagle though, look up a video of them fighting black bears.
Boars will absolutely murder you though. We have a fence on the Danish German border solely to keep wild boars out of Denmark because they kill so many people going for strolls in the forest. And the african variant obliterates lions by the way.
barnacles can grow in your lungs but since its 1v1 you'll win
Love these types of videos more joe ranks vids pls 🙏
Bro Im already predicting, that his chat will underestimate human strength
Joe keep up the good work man I discovered you 3month ago and you make my day every time you upload!
Not Joe mounting the ostrich like a lynel
Kinda want that tierlist made so everyone can use it just to see what Joes viewers make XD
Honestly joe is being pretty realistic, like except for some moments
Ostrage: Run's to joe to fight him
Joe being a jacked guy with a chizled jawline: Ehh idk if i could do it
The video I didnt't know I needed in my life
A swan is actually very powerful. They can literally break your bones by smacking you with their wings
Imagine not having the last 43 Joe Bart vids watched in a row
I love your videos bro keep it up!!
Bro thinks he’s Hercules 😭
Joe is by far one of the best streamers, I’m always left rolling around the place laughing after watching him 🫶🫶🫶
Dude the wolf and hyena kills you 100% of the time no question about it lol. Those are the 2 most absurd answers of all of them. They’re so fast and they will both bite you and rip you apart lol.
17:50 I'm crying of laughter
You should do something like this with a new random animal list and then if you think you can beat it add it 2 ur team and at the end it’s your team vs the ones you couldn’t beat
The way he kept circling back to fucking up the kangaroo had me crying
Joe is being a bit too confident 💀