It's upsetting this still happens but I'm glad your experience turnt around for you in the end. I'd highly recommend Lauralynn if anyone happens to go to the salon. I've attended her salon twice (before it closed) for a treatment/ silk press and I can honestly say it was a 10/10 experience. I left feeling full of joy, she was so attentive and knowledgeable in her craft, a true gem.
And this is precisely why I've become a DIY girl when it comes to hair (and nails). Even my mom now asks me to do her hair, since mine is healthy. These women are ridiculous, my hair was ruined twice, by 2 BW. The 2nd one did it purposely. Some of these YT hair care enthusiasts know FAR MORE about hair than most of these hairstylists. I screenshotted a comment from a black cosmetologist who said herself that she would never get her hair done by any professional ever in her life. Because afro hair is an afterthought in the industry (including for BP themselves). That was confirmation to me.
this is why so many of us think our kinky hair is “unmanageable” when it was just a matter of: -drenching each section in water -finger detangling, starting at the ends -then finishing it off with the brush. the end. but instead they insisted on making her hair feel like an overly complicated burden and like *she* was the one neglecting it. 🙄
I have silky 3b 3c type hair and I was STILL gaslighted about the "health" of my hair being told it was dry and needed better care and that's why she couldn't do my hair properly when the truth of the matter was she was salty and a hater because I care for my hair at home and come already blown out to the salon because the only thing I don't like doing at home too often is trimming. I'm just here for a trim and you STILL have a problem?? 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
The SAME EXACT thing happened to me! I was told my hair was "frizzy" and my cuticles were "all over the place" and I should book a silk press and olaplex treatment to start to "train" my hair. PS - My hair is waist length and would be classified as 4a. The shampoo girl detangled my hair just as terribly with a detangling brush. She told me that the hair that she veryyy clearlyyy broke off, was the hair that's supposed to come out during the detangling process >_>
@@MelenaSoleilI’m 3c/4a and won’t step foot in a salon unless I need a trim and even then you have to be careful cause they will try to cut all of your hair off.
@tgsg858 that's what happened to me! Even tho I told her my hair goals, mentioned that I was on a hair growth journey and asked her not to trim more than necessary. Then after she chicken chopped my hair she blamed ME saying I was just trying to bring drama to the salon like NO ma'am it can be clearly SEEN that I am justifiably upset about the awful chop job you did to my hair! That whole experience was honestly ridiculous. She and the salon owner need they azzes beat smh
it’s almost easier to stomach when the salon is anti black with their chest… but when they claim to be natural hair specialists and still traumatise you… yoh :(
omg I have the exact same sentiment 😭 I went to a natural hair specialist and they completely destroyed my hair by ripping through it with a small comb. I had to cut off about 6 inches 😔
None of these people can do hair....shampoo girl can’t detangle, was rough, also blow dried terribly. The blond who trimmed ur hair....u said u were willing to cut at the demarcation and SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE SOME SPLITS?! who does that? Stylists want their clients to take off all the unhealthy bits if willing. The woman who was speaking negative about her own hair is just showing that she can’t do her own hair.
Exactly and I would of politely asked her to stop and tell her it's bcus your ripping my hair out. I enjoyed the last lady she was confident knowledgeable and careful not to take to much off and explained why. The lady watching needed to do just that bcus her comments were horrific.
Every time I hear a black woman say their texture “isn’t for them” or “doesn’t work for me”, I get sad because I think that’s how they feel about my hair. I can understand if weave was for convenience, but not liking your own hair is completely different. Maybe don’t work with anyone’s hair until you heal that?
I get so stressed going to salons. I have thick long hair and i can break into 4-8 sections and have my entire head detangled from any state with a good detangling product and the proper brush in less than 15 minutes..just did it taking out braids a month old. I’m tired of the stylist gaslighting. Finger detangle large clumps, use a detangling product with slip, start at the ends, go to root. She didn’t do that....it especially makes me upset when it’s clear the stylist either doesn’t have healthy hair or never deals with their real hair.
@@mrod87Exactly!! I have super coily hair too and detangling is never an issue. Like justttt say you don't know what you're doing and give me the brush!
@@weirdwurld girl my last professional styling i had a sew in take down, the stylist was combing thru my mid back thick ass hair with a rat tail comb as she took the braids down, then tried to use a wide tooth comb from the root after all the braids were out. I was hurting so bad that after i recommended she break my hair into sections, i just said “hey i brought my tangle teaser i can do it if u don’t mind”...her energy changed and i knew she was pissed. She then took me to the shampoo bowl, only shampoo’d me ONCE after having a sew in for 6 weeks and then once again went to detangle my hair all at once....once i was towel dried i just told her i had somewhere to go, she put my hair in two braids and i left. I paid for the full service and even tipped her $20 bc it was obvious to me and everyone in that salon i was upset and she was upset and i wanted to cool the temperature in the salon. I was so pissed.
@@mrod87Wow! Sorry you had such a terrible experience, I’m shocked at just how bad some of these so called professional, black hair salon stylists are.😮
@@kadinelindsayart That has nothing to do with anti Blackness and everything ain't anti Blackness. It is not a requirement in cosmetology school to learn about Black hair. There's a minimum amount of information in those books dealing with textured hair. There are some stylists who don't care enough to further their education by paying to learn about Black hair care. The same way y'all get stuck on old remedies that granny taught you is the same way some of these stylists get stuck in doing things the way that they learned. That's how she detangles her own hair because that's how she was taught when she was younger. No one taught her to detangle hair like that.
@@amira_shmirayou’re right, some stylists only focus on what they’re taught and don’t try to learn further, so why aren’t we teaching about every hair texture? And why do think it’s okay to focus teaching on some rather than others? Every place will get multiple people with different race and textured hair, so why tf do yall think it’s okay for folks to pay for yall to half ass learn about some women’s hair. like this video states it’s a traumatizing experience that most women experience.
@@amira_shmirathat women was taught to detangle hair because she is in the job position of a professional who should be able to preform that simple beginning step. Im not sure if this is a sponsored hairstyle thang from a brand but they should atleast be listening and reading their customers comfort and taking their advice cause they’re in another person’s head.
As a stylist, she could have at least made her wig look a little more natural, and purchased one that did not look so cheap. I mean it’s her profession. Put some effort into it lol
I’ve walk out before mid appointment because the girl was so rough. Funny thing is she kept complimenting the health and length of my hair whilst simultaneously ripping it out. Yeah love it’s healthy because I treat it gently 😤
This is why I do my hair on my own. I’ve always had bad experiences with hair stylists. Infact i stopped getting braids done because of this. It’s 2024, but some stylists keep disappointing us
It took broken edges for me to finally take my hair into my own hands. Haven't been to the salon more than 5 times in the last 7 years, and even then I do my treatments and trimming myself, and only allow them to braid
@@c4tac133 I've shifted to shorter braids which aren't as heavy, and when I take them out I put my hair in twists instead of styling daily. This is a recent switch so hope to see some changes in length and thickness soon (always staying moisturising of course)
Damn, I felt that on the “prepping your hair before the appointment” section. I always fully detangle my hair before going to even a salon that I trust to blow out and trim my hair. But you’re so right, we shouldn’t have to do that. ESPECIALLY at these salon prices…
Hairstylist here....I think people SHOULD comb through their hair, not because I dint want to but because some people come with matted hair and want us to derange all that and compromise the time that was scheduled. Also, I do my best to consult with the client beforehand to know what I'm working with and the time needed to accomplish the service....
I feel your frustration 😮. This is suppose to be relaxing and enjoyable but, anytime you go to a 'specialist' and you have to teach them how to do their job, that's a problem. 😬
I’ve left in the middle of an appointment because the hairdresser was so rough. Thankfully, I’ve now found someone that actually knows what they’re doing.
s/o to you for honouring yourself and your head top! even more happy you’ve found someone you feel safe to do your hair with 🥹 why is finding a good stylist harder than dating????
Ive found a natural hair salon that I loved. But booking is a nightmare. You have to call on the first of the month. At a specific time until you get through. Nonsense.
Thanks for the trigger warning, because this is not a joke. This is actually making me so angry i could cry. I went natural because i hated the salon experience and i have only been to the salon a handful of times in the 15 years I have been natural. Even when i go to a natural salon, they always want me to have my hair prepped and detangled and charge a detangling fee for my very tightly coiled hair if it is not "detangled enough" (or "properly blown out" for braids). I am paying for a luxury service, I shouldn't have to do my hair before i get there and be treated like my hair texture is making their job so hard that i should be grateful with whatever experience/results. And i would never trust my natural hair to someone who is wearing a wig, degrading afros, looking at my hair confused while telling me to trust them and acting like I am the problem. (I know you didn't have a choice but it is making me so angry.) OK Lauralyn was a complete 180. What a great experience. She saved the day.
I'm so sorry this happened! I am truly amazed at your composure! I feel like I would've asked for the brush to show her how it's done. Why was she afraid of product???? Water and a product with some slip! Our hair is not unmanageable!! I detangle my super coily hair without any problems what the heck! I'm so glad you posted this. Is suchhhhh a real thing. I've heard so many wild stories. I'm glad it ended on a high note.
This also makes me think of a popular hair creator that hired someone for their wedding - not only did they switch their flight time (hella unprofessional) they were unprepared, andddddd used glue when it was requested several times that they not. Like they pushed the creators WHOLE WEDDING back...she didn't get to take photos with her soon to be hubby and bridesmaids because her hair stylist wasn't there! Ridiculous.
I don't think of detaingling my hair is making the salon comfortable but more about making me comfortable. I do it bcus I want to not bcus they asked or need it done. It's kinda like rinsing dishes b4 putting them in a dish washer.
Let me just say I am SO proud of you for speaking up and having the confidence to communicate how you want you hair handled because this is why I don’t let stylist touch my hair. I’m extremely particular about detangling and not ripping through my hair. My hair is extremely coily and butt length and I have mastered how to detangle my hair so it makes perfect sense to tell the stylist how to handle MY hair. Some of them lead with egos and don’t was to be “told what to do” or corrected since they have a license. It’s a shame they are like this because it take ONE session to set you back years of growth. They are quick to blame you for their screw ups and is ready to cut all your hair off.
Mannnn...a word!....my last stylist blocked me didnt want to do it anymore!...my hair is headed to butt length and very thick...I used to get silk presses...its been 5yrs since I had one and my hair is sooo much more healthy doing it myself!..I miss my silky press but its ok...and im saving sooo much $$$.
Never go to a stylist with a weave/wig if you have natural hair. I don't care if they swear on the Bible that they can do natural hair. LOL. Thank you for sharing your experience and exposing this place!! Your hair is so bomb on its own - they just don't know how to do our hair.
You know what. As someone who wears wigs mostly, I have to agree. When you wear wigs, you’re just not used to maintaining your natural hair texture on a day to day basis.
@@aisha691 💯 I’ve been natural for years but wore wigs and braids exclusively. It wasn’t until I ditched them this year and started to wear my hair out that I really began to understand it. It’s a completely different ballgame. I would never trust my hair to someone who was like I was wearing wigs and weaves all the time.
This is so sad, because unfortunately a lot of them don’t want to confront their own anti blackness. A lot of people will think I’m weird for this…but a girl in a wig or with a relaxer could never do my natural…that’s a BIG rule of thumb for me. Also that lady with Red hair, has nasty energy, your not supposed do any hot oil treatment. It’s sad seeing things like this, because im à at home braider and constantly people down play the work I do and tell us how all the salon are better, when I remember going to salon, most of the aunties are anti black and out of touch. No matter if they washing your hair or not. Also people forgot we stopped washing peoples hair, because many naturals prefer to wash their own hair and use their own products. But we’re being demonized for it. Even though we’re doing braids for 12+ hours and not a damn relaxer. Even all the relaxers and stuff coming back, is showing that ALOT of people NEVER dealt with their internalize anti blackness. The way people act like they’re taking this heavy weight off their shoulder by going to straight hair. Like people can keep gaslighting themselves that it’s just hair…but it isn’t really. When she said she doesn’t think her hair texture suit her…I would’ve walked out tbh. I’m so sorry you had this experience.
Hair trauma at the hands of other black women hits so different 😭. It’s 2024, there’s no excuse for hairstylists RIPPING out type 4 hair due to ignorance and or impatience . Then have the audacity to try and educate YOU in the midst of causing breakage and tangling. So sorry you had to go through that. Your new cut looks absolutely stunning ❤️
I love your attitude lmao, you were making them pick their self awareness/low self esteem issues apart, while you barely said anything at all. True definition of, silence speaks better than words😭 she was over explaining while she wouldn't wear her " natural hair at all" and you allowed that open space for her to vent almost to her self.
Yeah, this is why I don't do hair salons lol. One traumatizing experience is enough. My last one was at a Dominican hair salon (I'm in NY) and that was over 10 years ago. Haven't been since. One other thing I noticed is that the stylist who was most knowledgable and gentle rocked her natural hair herself. Big key. The other two had weave / wigs and expressed some disdain for natural hair themselves. These women tend to have a lane and it's not natural hair.
i am also vexed she said "trust me" whilst playing in your head. honestly i'm watching this video through my fingers. i wish there was a known resouce where we could share reviews on salons nationwide so we could avoid "just trust me" people
this is the first time i’ve EVER seen a video of a black woman speaking up for herself in the salon and actively challenging anti-black & negative natural hair sentiments… YOU’RE AMAZING GIRL 🤎🤎🤎
The number of times I've had to tell hairdressers not to brush my hair with a rat tail comb is so crazy to me. And just like in the video I'm often dismissed " you know you have natural hair" huh!? And it's more appalling because this is in Nigeria.
I was just thinking - come to Nigeria. Then I saw the end of your comment 😂😂😂 Before I got microlocs, I was a solicitor and advocate everytime I went to a "natural" hair salon in Nigeria. But that was way back in 2017. Many are much more knowledgeable now. Back then it was something else. I ended up avoiding all hair salons and then installed microlocs for myself and my daughter. Peace like a river 😅
This video displays such an important conversation I’ve found myself having in many salons. From having to advocate for myself to someone complimenting my texture and going on to telling me they themselves could never wear their own hair out because it doesn’t look “good”. Ugh, this video made me feel so many feelings but I am so happy you allowed us to have this conversation. Continue to advocate for yourself always. We love these types of conversations, even when they are hard ones to have.
It boggles my mind when people say their own hair doesn't suit them! Whaaaat!? How can that be? How cool it would have been for that lady to rock her afro, instead of dead-ass telling a client "my hair doesn't work for me"! Time to decolonize your hair baby!
I am so glad you recorded this 👏 It’s so sad because as black women we already get invalidated a lot by the world, but to get invalidated in black spaces by another black woman is another level of trauma and pain. But i was happy to see how the session ended and how you highlighted the positives!
Considering the mindset of the workers at the salon in regards to type 4 hair lowkey it's no wonder your experience was so triggering and they ripped your hair out. I hope one day we can leave these harmful mindsets in the past, it's 2024 :(
It truly is so upsetting when they gaslight you by giving you ‘tips’ assuming you don’t know how to take care of your own hair and insinuating that their lack of training is actually your fault. So uncomfortable.
I'm in a cosmetology school with predominantly Black student serving a predominantly Black community and I running into the same issues. Students and instructors not knowing how to handle natural hair, making snide comments, losing patience and being aggressive when detangling, etc. I feel like as Black people servicing Black clients we should do/know better.
I noticed how uncomfortable she was getting after realising you were standing your ground with not agreeing with her when she said an Afro/natural hair didn’t suit some people.
Stories like these are why I do my own hair. I have never been to a salon in my life. And if I ever decide to go to one, and the stylists are wearing wigs and talking about not liking their natural hair texture, I'm walking right out. They ain't laying a finger on me.
Yeah that big wig with a hat on top?? We can't even see what you're working with sis...shouldn't you be your own advertisement? Like, I'm definitely not getting a facial from someone who looks like they neglect their skin.
The tangle teezer is NOT for your hair. She could have dropped it and just used that denman. And where was the moisture!!! In many regards YOU were the expert on your hair! Also the final hairstylist needs to RETRAIN the other staff because that was unacceptable. You gave the appropriate trigger warning 😭
🥲🥲🥲 i actually really love the tangle teezer brush she was using, but i’m a lot more thorough with my detangling before using it + i don’t tug through ❤️🩹 it’s okay though, we live, we learn + we talk about it 🫂
No it's not hard to stick up for yourself in a salon. Just as you would not let someone you feel uncomfortable with continue to make you feel uncomfortable and gaslight you bcus they fall short, it's the same with your hair, it's not separate from your body it's grown from it.
@@aquafina6544 It IS hard when you're in an unfamiliar environment and outnumbered, just look at the video! They teamed up to gaslight her instead of listening!
I have had this experience many times and felt so defeated. I could be getting praised for my texture/length/thickness etc and in the same breath have my hair ripped out and see their visible frustration. Even though we are in 2024 I still don’t see a full force of change in salon experiences with textured hair. I wondered if maybe we need another viral phenomenon where you get asked “ curly babes what’s one thing you wanna tell your “natural hairstylist”?” I’ll start “ stop detangling my hair from the roots with a rest rail comb, stop praising and then self deprecating our natural hair in the same breath, stop saying you can do something when you, in fact, can not…”
I visited two "natural hair" salons in my home country and left with a throbbing scalp and my hair all over the floor. When I complained they tried to make me feel like I was being difficult.
Wow, this video was so triggering. I can relate MASSIVELY, as I've been dismissed similarly. It's so good that you shared this video, as it happens all the time but is not discussed enough. Plus, I agree re the comment about needing to prep before going to the salon -like why!!!! I'm paying for my hair to be done!!!
Felt really proud of you for advocating for yourself. It was funny hearing them talk without realizing they have ways to go but I like that she apoligized at the end at the very least. At last, you looked gorgeous, imagine looking that beautiful in cornrows
@@SkyeID I didn't get that vibe in the moment but I know what you mean. My standards are really low when it comes to black hair salons lol, but you right thats not even a good apology
This is SOOO relatable. I feel like I lose hair every time I go to a black salon. And to make it worse, they have the nerveeeeee to get upset and rude when you speak up about them destroying your hairrrr! Whewwwwww. Im triggered lol but your hair style at the end was so beautiful though
I'm going to keep it one hundred with you. The fact that most hair salons aren't gentle during detangling (or at all) is the very reason that I don't go to hair salons anymore. There are only 2 people who touch my hair. Me and my mom. Me because I will be gentle. My mom because she will listen to me if I tell her something hurts. I wholeheartedly agree that it's a problem in salons and it should change and improve. But because I know how it is, I'm not about to give anyone the opportunity to jack my hair up. I think as much as it sucks (and as uncomfortable as it may be), there may be situations where you literally have to get up from the chair and not let them finish or just don't go to them in the 1st place. But that's my two cents though. 🤷
The girl with the red hair letting you know that you should “prep” your hair before going to the salon is crazy!!! And the “stylist” testing out your hair, using all these fantasy gadgets on your hair with no clue… ahhhh they really irritated me. That’s why I haven’t been to a salon for 7 years (I had locs). Glad all turned out great in the end 💖💐
I am just going to say this and get a lot of hate. Most black woman hate their hair. They prefer 4 hours of taking care of a curly/straight wig than taking care of their natural hair. Even the esthetic of the natural hair is not appealing to them. I understand blaming it on society and all, but at some point, we need to take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves if the expensive wigs, the glue, some of the so-called "protective styles" and all the other things that we do are just to protect or hide our hair.
No hate here. I agree that most blk women would prefer a different texture of hair (myself included) and I'll go along with the hiding aspect also. I don't think anybody has to like everything about themself. I hate spending hours to detangle my hair and opening my wallet for the pint of conditioner I need to put on it every time just to make that process less damaging. I love the look and the silkiness of my wavy wigs and the effortless way I can style them with water and mousse and be out the door without fearing if my products are gonna hold up or flake up. I don't have to squint nor reach for a needle because there's no single strand knots to seek and destroy. Personally, the time, money and effort needed to achieve a look with my 4c hair that I'm actually pleased with don't compare. And I say this without any shame as I'd rather be doing any activity that brings me happiness or teaches me something rather than the grudge matches I have to regularly endure just to maintain basic grooming. There are some who are completely opposite-- they revel in the self-care element/ love doing hair/are able to execute beautiful styles... and that's wonderful. It only becomes a problem when one side of the coin tries to belittle the other. I say wear your hair (or the hair you bought) however you like it, period.
@riceandramen I completely respect your viewpoint. Thanks for sharing. Do you think you prefer other textures because taking care of your hair was not a skill you were taught at a young age?
@@kharcasse5303as a reformed wig wearer, her comment is very painful to read. wigs are not more convenient or cheaper than natural hair, it’s just a widely accepted way to be lazy and not take care of yourself. if we be honest, you wouldn’t need a needle to detangle if you didn’t abandon your hair for 3 months under a wig.
@@riceandramenyou don’t want to open your wallet for a pint of £10 conditioner, but you can open it to pay hundreds for a wig, construction and installation, glue, mousse and hot tools?
I've seen this conversation happening online regarding US stylists, especially about hair braiders. Surprised but not surprised this is happening overseas as well. I feel like black stylists wish black women would go back to relaxers. My hair is very easy to detangle but it takes patience and knowledge.
I also think some wish we would go back to relaxers, so they try to discourage us. It doesn’t work on me. I’ve started doing my own hair; I just need to learn to trim it 😊
Not them gaslighting you when the problem was NOT your hair it was her detangling method 🫠🫠🫠... Well done for speaking up in such a graceful yet assertive way. Sorry this was your experience. This really just highlights the difference between the actual hair stylists and the inconsistency in training. Salons need to vet who they have working for them more because based off of this video, I would never go there! But I went to the same salon with different hair stylists and loved my experience and actually somewhat restored my trust in the black hair salon experience. But, now I'm right back where I was. Such a shame!
really glad you had a positive experience, which was definitely my cause with Lauralyn 🥹 it’s clear that the stylist ≠ the salon, so i’ll be definitely vetting out my stylists more in future 🫰🏾
I'm so sorry Michie this happened to you, you didn't deserve any of it. I wished she would have actually listened to you and adjusted accordingly. I am glad that in the end, you had a different experience. Thank you for sharing this video I hope you continue to flourish. 💜
i can feel your pain sis, i just stopped going to the salon all together, because if you tell hem how to handle your hair properly, they are just gonna start giving you an attitude and the experience gets worse from there.
This is the exact reason why I have avoided salons my whole life. I went to a ‘black’ hair salon 2 years ago and it was clear they didn’t have a lot of experience with my hair texture. I asked for a wash and go and left with an undefined afro with HELLA flakes. Would love for the uk to have a RELIABLE and TRUSTED hair salon for 4c and 4b hair! I feel like the USA I’d defo leading in this space 😭
I relate SO HARD. There is definitely a lack of natural hair salons that are solely focused on natural haircare in the UK. I've honestly had to hold my tears in during some appointments😭. Most stylists here only care about styling (wigs, sew ins etc). I've my learned my lesson the hard way unfortunately.
I wish that were true about the US. I’ve had this very same experience in different states in various cities. I have found, if the stylists is wearing their own natural hair and it’s type 4 hair, the experience is much better.
I resonate so heavily with the video. I had a horrible experience with a black hairdresser in Manchester (would love to name and shame but I’ll bite my tongue) a few months ago. She tore through my hair, caused pain to my scalp and even left me with a style costing over £100 but lasting less than 48 hours. I didn’t speak out then but I’m determined to never let myself go through something like that again
Im a stylist in Virginia, non-black latino and I love that you did this video because it really helps me understand the black experience behind the chair with so much more nuance. I dont have your texture, so I can't ever fully understand, but it helps me understand better the things I can do to give my tight curl clients an overall better experience.
If my hairdresser tell me That they Afro doesn’t work for her , I am leaving , she clearly doesn’t like to use her hair, so why I would let her touch mine , the only people will touch my hair are the people o love 4c hair
So glad you created this video Michie! The salon experience across the globe is a shame for us. When I went to Nigeria (where my family is originally from), they charged me EXTRA for being natural. It was absurd!!
This is why I detangle my hair at home before going to the salon😭😭I rarely go because black hair stylists don't care about your hair (At least the stylist I've encountered)...they don't care about how much work you put into your hair for it to look the way it looks they simply don't! They don't even listen when u try to tell them how you want your hair to be handled....I remember crying myself to sleep when a stylist damaged my hair beyond recognition🤢🤮 and did she ever apologize?, nope all she did was mock me about how I've lost my length.....I only go to stylist when I'm too lazy to to do my own hair or when a girl just wants to be pampered... anyway I'm happy that you're back I missed your content 🖤
As a professional within this industry, I will begin by saying that, if you had to wait until the styling stage of your appointment to have an elevated experience, you have been failed. This is because the preparation, the cleansing, treating and drying are the most fundamental elements of your appointment. If your hair needs aren’t addressed at that stage, it is too late. Those are the stages for hair loss / damage prevention. There is still no curriculum for Afro hair within the National Vocational Qualification in the UK and it is at best inadequate level of education worldwide. Every professional needs to have the basic levels of qualification, the NVQ level 1,2 and 3 before touching anyone’s hair. In the UK, you do not need a license to practice in hairdressing . If you can obtain some sort of insurance policy, the local council will allow you to trade. There is an argument for those who learn on the job, some have learned from the best but have no scientific or formal underpinnings knowledge. The two elements, theory and practical, must be present to achieve high hair care outcomes. It is also unfortunate that we have come to accept such low standards of practice because our expectations have adjusted. If a professional hairdresser wants to, they can become exceptional at caring for Afro hair. They MUST have the desire to be committed, diligent and be prepared to invest heavily in the craft and clients must be prepared to pay for the skill and value. So long as we keep accepting such low standards of care for our hair, people will continue to provide to meet those low standards. I will be making lots of content for the hair care service users soon. I will be looking at some of the things to watch out for when visiting a professional, what their qualifications translate to for the client, how to find out if they have all the professional prerequisites to practice. I do sincerely hope my comment helps someone and as a proud member of this industry who is committed to driving excellence within this field, I’m sorry for your experience. 💚
Girllll your facial expressions dealing with these women😂😂😂 your hair is absolutely beautiful! I'm currently back home in South Sudan, and I'm really annoyed right now. I went natural last year and I found a wonderful salon in London. They did such a wonderful job with my natural hair and helped me appreciate my hair again. I recently braided my hair and one side has broken off....because this silly tart of a woman tugged at the hair and twisted my hair, so when i tried to undo the braids, my hair broke. I've been avoiding going to the salon here for a few days because i need someone who will be gentle on my hair. Usually, South sudanese are gentle on the hair, but the woman who did my hair wasn't South sudanese. When i braided my hair last time, the braids were well done with no issues whatsoever. Wish me luck, i hope i find someone who is gentle on my hair tomorrow. Our hair requires a gentle touch, i honestly don't know why people are so rough! For those who live in London, the salon that I go to is PurelyNatural in Stratford. It's amazing.
I've decided to just blow dry my hair before going to a stylist. I literally had 1 salon I trusted to wash my hair & the owner greeted my partner, but NOT me when I ran into her. Then posted a subliminal about "I only greet people I know, I don't owe you anything" on FB within the hour. I stopped going to her after that. I was a regular at her place! I haven't had a professional trim since (2019). I've taught myself to do it. But it sucks that we cannot relax at a random salon because of our type 4 hair.
I remember my experience of multiple people tugging on my hair from different sides, getting oil in my eyes, and feeling overstimulated and ignored. Not to mention they laughed when I cried 🥲 the hair salon is definitely the last choice for me now
You are absolutely beautiful. For me, I purposely find beautiful black women who embrace their natural features (like you) and I imitate them - instead of those who frequent long weaves, lashes, and loads of makeup. Because of this, I continue find new and innovate ways to upkeep my natural beauty. Blessings to you.
I'm loced; had microlocs for 5 years now, so I don't know how CZcams decided this was a good video suggestion, but when I saw the SKIN!!! 😍😍😍 I clicked with the speed 😂 Sis needs to take that pro-tip and shove it where the sun don't shine. MY first trigger was seeing two black women standing around you with straight hair (that isn't theirs) but servicing another black woman in a "natural hair salon". Let's just say that after having to take care of my own hair and advocate for myself in black-owned NATURAL hair salons for 2 years, discovering microlocs was a blessing.
Wish I could send a VM instead of typing, cos this will be long. Take this from the mother of a genuine 4c black little girl - save your coins, go buy you the biggest tub of raw shea butter you can find on the market, buy a bag of frozen okra (or fresh, doesn't matter) chop it up, boil it till it bubbles over and thickens, strain the juice add it to a blender with the shea butter and whip till it's smooth and fluffy. That's all the pre-poo and post shampoo treatment you need. Your hair is about half the length and three quarters the fullness my daughter's hair was before I installed her microlocs. I swear by the RAW shea butter and okra juice combo. Your comb will glide through. If it doesn't, come back here and call me any names you can think of 😂😂😂
@antoinettenyuurnibe3302 okro has no smell really. Think the smell of parsley kind of. Raw shea butter smells kinda earthy and might take getting used to. But a way around it is to add a few drops of your favourite essential oils.
Fellow loc girly 🫶🏾that was also triggered by this video 😢 even starting my locs in a natural hair salon was traumatic. I’ve gotten two professional retwists in the four years since and thankfully both were better but I definitely wish this was not a norm for black women.
Fr though i would cry when i get home. The attitude alone! It's giving " you are yapping too much so therefore i won't detangle that section anymore" Short story but a true experience Years back when i knew nothing of natural hair care, i went to a salon to get my hair done. The lady kept combing my hair roughly (mind you i was 17) and it was hurting me badly. I pleaded with her that she should be gentle, it was giving me a headache and guess what she told me Let me type it in her words "Its not my fault. You are the one that want to keep natural hair so deal with it" She said this to my face. Back then i was still young and clueless. Did a big chop at 18 I'm 21 now, my hair close to waist length and i haven't been to the salon in 2+ years. Everything i know now, it was self learning. Till date, i do not allow anyone with negative energy touch my hair. Because at the end of the day, no one really cares about you the way you do. Never had a good salon experience.i wish i would but I'm way past that now. I'm pretty sure no hairstylist will be able to tolerate me giving them corrections lol someone's gonna get mad and rip out my hair. So I'm just staying clear🙂
5:39 no ma’am. I’ve been in the salon, and actually told them I was detangling my hair myself. I am very, very particular about my hair and I’m blessed to have a wonderful hairdresser, but even with her, I’m very particular. Even if she misses rinsing my hair with cold water, I speak up and say something. Advocate for yourself!
I think … I’m going to normalize mustering courage to just get up out of hair stylists chair and thank them for trying ; but advise that they are damaging my hair and I will not be continuing with the service … this will be a challenge for me and this will be hard but I will work to do it if this salon experience ever happens to me as well again (it had happened many a time to me) thank you for taking one for the team but I am so sorry this happened to you . Why do brown hairstylist girlies think tangle teaser brushes are made and magic for detangling all hair types !! 😭😭 use wide tooth combs and small sections! Why in the world would I come to the hair salon with a hot oil treatment the day before ? You are absolutely right! That’s just laziness on the stylist part. I would never come here. They should have detangling agents on deck after identifying the texture of the client like castor oil water , pattern beauty detangling nectar maybe or miche beauty’s pre poo .. this is so crazy…
I have actually done this. Or just brushed my own hair in the salon and asked for a discount. That was 3 years ago and I haven't been back. I've only been 4 or 5 times in my life and hated every time bar one and that was a white textured hair specialist...
@@koyaharvey-walker3794 oh wow ! I’m proud of you for doing that! I never thought to ask for a discount that makes sense ! And Thats crazy sis 😭 im sorry that happened to you . Its a shame majority of us cant have good . experiences with our own people in salons. I have only had good experiences at the Ouidad salon in NYC which my sister put me on to in my mid 20s . But before being loyal to Ouidad ? Same horrible experience of not properly detangling at the ends first verses starting mid shaft . A mess ! I always wondered if these stylists are losing money because more naturals are opting to just doing their own hair or buying their own wigs .
Michie, I am so sorry this happened to you. I have never wanted to jump through a screen and just slap someone's hand so much. The stylist was so condescending. If you have to do your hair before the appointment, why go? That's a waste of money. All she needed to do was water your hair, use a detangler, emulsify and comb from the bottom upward. How can they be saying on one hand that its wild how many people have horror stories but in the same breath disregard your concerns and handle your hair so terribly. It's literally triggering to watch. Black hairstylists perpetuate so much texturism and anti-blackness, I am tired of it. Many deserve to be out of business and/or boycotted. Maybe this makes me strict, but I will not go to any natural hairstylist who does not wear their natural hair exclusively. Because if you do not like your hair or wear it, why would you treat mine with kindness or care? Also, the lady with the red hair saying she has no hair texture - she needs a hair detox and her hair is over oiled. (But that's neither here nor there) And natural hair suits everyones head which it comes out of. PLus there are many quality kinky wigs, so the point about if she can find a good one is non-existent because she is not look for those wigs. The lead hair stylist ate. She needs to rehire some new stylists though.
My stomach was hurting watching the way she was raking through your hair. I cut off my locks after 20 odd years and went to the salon. The way the woman was SNATCHING through my virgin hair solidified why I never returned. Recently I went to a small salon where the sink was in the broom closet and I had to step over a dirty mop and since I had removed my glasses, I wasn’t sure if the bowl sink was clean. They stylist also kept stepping over a plug of hair on the floor instead of sweeping it up. I was the only client there so she wasn’t swamped. I’ve never really felt a real transformative salon experience tbh.
Situations like this are the reason that I do my own hair: I try my best to create my own luxury salon experience at home (gentle defanging, top tier products, relaxing environment, etc). I’ve watched so many “head spa” treatments from Japan and other Asian countries that I thought to myself, “Why can’t type 4 and 3C ladies have these types of salon experiences, where every move is comforting and the goal is to make you & your hair feel elevated during your entire time in the chair?” So I do that for myself: wash day is around 3+ hours for me, but I feel fabulous and my hair looks really great in the end. True self-care … It’s worth the time & effort.
watching the first part and then the part with Laurelynn was so lovely cause whew i was stressed outt and then the way you can tell she cares for your hair and your opinions, first lady was like she needed it done asap but with Laurelynn she genuinely took her time and in the long run that is how customers stay not from speed but from the quality
i have always said this - how i hate people feeling like they should make me pay them hundreds of dollars to PLAY in my hair!? idgi!? the anxiety of going to a salon is of its own entity bro. i see you. i understand you. this is a valid and real experience and you're right - so many of us have endured this for way too long. black women are expected to "endure" even what's sold as a "luxury" experience and it brings me to literal tears. ily.
You are sooo gorgeous. Your hair and dimples 😍😍😍. With that said, im sooooo sorry about your experience. The detangling was atrocious, she was just raking it was harshly and not even listening 🙁 i had my hair professional colored by my very close friend’s sister (she is Black and Creole but it wasn’t an all Black salon). It came out amazing. The following year I came to do my roots and she destroyed my hair with bleach to then dumped dark brown on it (i went for blonde highlights). This was at a very nice and higher end salon. She did this because she wanted me to divulge her in gossip about her sister’s dating life which i refused to participate in. It was so traumatizing to see my curls so damaged and tangled and at the same fkn brown color. 💔 But that experience led me to a new type of stylist and salon. I go to ceremonial hairstylist who fuses well-being, love, and culturally relatable space for me - she’s Indigenous Mexican and she cleanses me with copal incense and I can speak to her about how I feel about my hair and the spiritual relationship I have with my hair. First time I wasn’t laughed at or had eyes rolled at me by a stylist for discussing this. You actually have the entire salon to yourself so that it’s very private and intimate. My first visit, i cried my heart to her and she told me i am beautiful and she is honored help me feel the beauty in my hair again. I had to chop off inches and i rocked a shorter cut which i thought didn’t suit me but that journey made me realize i could have very short or even no hair and I’m still beautiful. The salon is “Keep Your Crown Right” in SoCal and that amazing woman was gifted by God to shape ALL, waves, curls, coils, and kinks Anyways, i am happy to see you smile and enjoy your style at the end of the video💖🫶🏾
This was traumatising to watch. I actually had tears in my eyes. Brought back bad memories. I’ve not stepped foot inside a hair salon in time and this reminded me why. Thanks for posting the video. It needs to be shown to all trainees. Also, you looked beautiful with your canerows. ❤
Thanks for shedding light on this real life issue. As a Canadian, the hunt for finding a proper natural hair stylist is rough out here. I had to learn the hard way- If the stylist herself doesn't have healthy hair, dont even bother sitting in that chair. I've had stylist CUT inches off my hair when I requested only a trim, over bleached my hair on multiple occasions, over processed my kertain treatment which lead to chunks of my hair falling out! Braided too tight that it caused the strands to prematurely fall out... all while expecting you to still pay and overcharge for their mishaps! These days, im so traumatized and disappointed in the level of unprofessionalism and lack of quality among black hair stylist. Also I want women to be VERY CAREFUL of hair envy among these hair stylist- they will butcher you on purpose. It's just wise at this point, to learn to style and do your hair yourself 😮💨
Yeah this video reminded why I also don't like to go to the hair salon. Why is is so common for hair stylists to expect us to prep our hair beforehand. And then leave feeling bad about your hair. Ahhh yeah this video triggered me. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experience
Omg, I'm only halfway through and this is making my skin crawl. I'm so sorry you had to experience this! I have been there several times and have also felt the apprehension of needing to speak up for myself. But yes, I hate when salons claim to do natural hair and then you get there, and it's clear they are so far removed working with highly-textured strands that they have no idea what they're doing. It's awful when you feel your hair is worse off after going than before you went in.
OMG! the woman at the end was fantastic, we def need more of her to help us with healing from and trusting black hair salons because every experience I have had has been like the first 3 quarters of the video... I am unfortunately used to being dismissed and experiencing texturism esp in natural hair salons, very disheartening
I’m from nyc and I used to go to the Dominicans to get my hair done but as I got older I had to stop going. It felt like they didn’t know how to properly treat hair (but if you speak Spanish or they personally like you, they’ll definitely give you a better experience), the lack of care that goes into properly detangling hair is beyond me. I’ve been doing my own hair for about 10 year now and only occasionally go to a salon to get my ends trimmed when I can’t do it myself. It’s either you find a hairdresser you truly trust or just do your own hair, there’s no in between honestly. Your hair is beautiful and I’m sorry you had to go through this, it’s so frustrating for us natural hair girlies to get proper treatment at salons.
Thank you for sharing this video. I stopped relaxing my hair in the 90s; and bad salon experiences are still the norm. The need for us to educate our stylists, followed by their refusal to accept that we're more knowledgeable about our hair than them, then having to recover from damage created by the salon is so frustrating, such a waste of time, and sickingly expensive that we're better off prepping our hair ourselves and only paying for the services we're confident in their ability to execute. Stylists need to invest time and money in learning how to care for our hair with the same degree of intentionality and commitment they dedicate to learning eye-catching or trendy hairstyles. Thanks again for sharing.
6:50 10000% correct...I've been to alot of salons and I don't take back chatter. I tell them what I want and if they can't they know I'm not afraid to start stepping because I'm the customer. If I was not a 4c gal then they wouldn't be saying anything....
Good for you for addressing this. I would say directly and absolutely, if the stylist doesn't wear HER hair in a natural style, STAY AWAY from her. They ALL say they know what they are doing. It's a lie and they are too embarrassed to admit it. A stylist who wears a natural hair style either knows how to do it or knows someone who does. Someone on the street wearing their natural hair the way you like is the best person to get recommendations from. Random doesn't work for us. Hint, Black men don't do that much to their hair, Black women shouldn't either. Salons are cute, but they aren't our jam. Consider how they make their money. The more they do to your hair, the more they get paid. BEWARE. Stay beautiful, stay natural. Much love!
This is so unfortunate. Why are black customers expected to à la carte and DIY most of their haircare BEFORE going to the salon? I’m getting married next weekend and people keep asking why I’m not going to a stylist. This is why. It would be cool to visit a salon if I were recommended a particular stylist who was really tender and gentle with 4c hair.
Truly truly bless you for the bravery it took to 1. speak up for yourself in such a scary moment 2. bring us into this super vulnerable, very relatable, not talked about enough moment and 3! To be brave enough to hold oneself accountable with grace to say "This was a moment where I didn't advocate for myself, but with self love, I know better." The growth is inspiring and this was truly a mirror into how I would sit in the chair just soooo sure they knew MY HAIR more than me. Whew! Keep being great love. So proud of you.
I learned many years ago to have a consultation with the hairdresser and look at their hair before letting them proceed with any shampooing, conditioning,etc. 🧐
This just shows the reality of “speaking up” as a black woman,. They tell us to self advocate and that people cannot read our minds. Okay sure. Then when you do you may still be ignored or dismissed. That doesn’t mean don’t speak up, but when giving that advice provide the caveat that you may be completely disregarded anyway.
Thanks for uploading and highlighting this issue. I’ve had bad experiences at the salon for the longest time. I stopped going and did my own hair for 11 years . Last year I did a lot of research on a particular salon for natural hair. I left with my hair damaged despite me constantly interjecting to advise them on how I handle my hair as they had no clue!!! I was ignored and left with damaged hair and £100’s of pounds lighter. The salon ignored me when I told them they’d damaged my hair and I wanted a conversation on what went wrong and a full refund. 10 months later I am currently negotiating a settlement after taking my case to a solicitor. I’m never going to a salon again it’s going to take years to get my hair back to the same health & length.
It's upsetting this still happens but I'm glad your experience turnt around for you in the end. I'd highly recommend Lauralynn if anyone happens to go to the salon. I've attended her salon twice (before it closed) for a treatment/ silk press and I can honestly say it was a 10/10 experience. I left feeling full of joy, she was so attentive and knowledgeable in her craft, a true gem.
Them talking about the misfortune of bad salon experiences while ripping through your hair is INSANE.
🥲
That was wild
And this is precisely why I've become a DIY girl when it comes to hair (and nails). Even my mom now asks me to do her hair, since mine is healthy.
These women are ridiculous, my hair was ruined twice, by 2 BW. The 2nd one did it purposely. Some of these YT hair care enthusiasts know FAR MORE about hair than most of these hairstylists.
I screenshotted a comment from a black cosmetologist who said herself that she would never get her hair done by any professional ever in her life. Because afro hair is an afterthought in the industry (including for BP themselves). That was confirmation to me.
@RooHue unfortunately that’s what they do
Exactly…I’d really like to chit-chat with that owner - LOL-ish!
Not the two professionals tag-teaming to gaslight you into thinking your hair is unhealthy hence the tugging and breakage
this is why so many of us think our kinky hair is “unmanageable” when it was just a matter of:
-drenching each section in water
-finger detangling, starting at the ends
-then finishing it off with the brush.
the end.
but instead they insisted on making her hair feel like an overly complicated burden and like *she* was the one neglecting it. 🙄
I have silky 3b 3c type hair and I was STILL gaslighted about the "health" of my hair being told it was dry and needed better care and that's why she couldn't do my hair properly when the truth of the matter was she was salty and a hater because I care for my hair at home and come already blown out to the salon because the only thing I don't like doing at home too often is trimming. I'm just here for a trim and you STILL have a problem?? 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
The SAME EXACT thing happened to me! I was told my hair was "frizzy" and my cuticles were "all over the place" and I should book a silk press and olaplex treatment to start to "train" my hair.
PS - My hair is waist length and would be classified as 4a. The shampoo girl detangled my hair just as terribly with a detangling brush. She told me that the hair that she veryyy clearlyyy broke off, was the hair that's supposed to come out during the detangling process >_>
@@MelenaSoleilI’m 3c/4a and won’t step foot in a salon unless I need a trim and even then you have to be careful cause they will try to cut all of your hair off.
@tgsg858 that's what happened to me! Even tho I told her my hair goals, mentioned that I was on a hair growth journey and asked her not to trim more than necessary. Then after she chicken chopped my hair she blamed ME saying I was just trying to bring drama to the salon like NO ma'am it can be clearly SEEN that I am justifiably upset about the awful chop job you did to my hair! That whole experience was honestly ridiculous. She and the salon owner need they azzes beat smh
it’s almost easier to stomach when the salon is anti black with their chest… but when they claim to be natural hair specialists and still traumatise you… yoh :(
omg I have the exact same sentiment 😭 I went to a natural hair specialist and they completely destroyed my hair by ripping through it with a small comb. I had to cut off about 6 inches 😔
@@tmimochasmh! sad
Right 😫😫😫
The way she was detangling gave “unqualified”
None of these people can do hair....shampoo girl can’t detangle, was rough, also blow dried terribly. The blond who trimmed ur hair....u said u were willing to cut at the demarcation and SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE SOME SPLITS?! who does that? Stylists want their clients to take off all the unhealthy bits if willing. The woman who was speaking negative about her own hair is just showing that she can’t do her own hair.
@@mrod87 I agree. I wouldn’t want a stylist doing my natural hair but hates her own natural hair. Our community has work to do.
I literally screamed at the phone screen. INSANITYYYY!!!!
I went there and you are correct based on the conversation the person I had was not qualified for the amount I paid. Nice girl though.
Exactly and I would of politely asked her to stop and tell her it's bcus your ripping my hair out. I enjoyed the last lady she was confident knowledgeable and careful not to take to much off and explained why. The lady watching needed to do just that bcus her comments were horrific.
Every time I hear a black woman say their texture “isn’t for them” or “doesn’t work for me”, I get sad because I think that’s how they feel about my hair. I can understand if weave was for convenience, but not liking your own hair is completely different. Maybe don’t work with anyone’s hair until you heal that?
they really be putting bad energy and unhealed trauma into your hair
"Sorry if you felt like I was tugging your hair". Is that an apology?!
😅
I get so stressed going to salons. I have thick long hair and i can break into 4-8 sections and have my entire head detangled from any state with a good detangling product and the proper brush in less than 15 minutes..just did it taking out braids a month old. I’m tired of the stylist gaslighting.
Finger detangle large clumps, use a detangling product with slip, start at the ends, go to root. She didn’t do that....it especially makes me upset when it’s clear the stylist either doesn’t have healthy hair or never deals with their real hair.
@@mrod87Exactly!! I have super coily hair too and detangling is never an issue. Like justttt say you don't know what you're doing and give me the brush!
@@weirdwurld girl my last professional styling i had a sew in take down, the stylist was combing thru my mid back thick ass hair with a rat tail comb as she took the braids down, then tried to use a wide tooth comb from the root after all the braids were out. I was hurting so bad that after i recommended she break my hair into sections, i just said “hey i brought my tangle teaser i can do it if u don’t mind”...her energy changed and i knew she was pissed. She then took me to the shampoo bowl, only shampoo’d me ONCE after having a sew in for 6 weeks and then once again went to detangle my hair all at once....once i was towel dried i just told her i had somewhere to go, she put my hair in two braids and i left. I paid for the full service and even tipped her $20 bc it was obvious to me and everyone in that salon i was upset and she was upset and i wanted to cool the temperature in the salon. I was so pissed.
@@mrod87Wow! Sorry you had such a terrible experience, I’m shocked at just how bad some of these so called professional, black hair salon stylists are.😮
I totally agree with you on this! Black hairdressers need more training on afro hair.
They honestly need to keep themselves updated regulay.
But a lot of them don’t want to confront their anti blackness unfortunately
@@kadinelindsayartwell even in current cosmetology they don’t teach anything about Afro textured hair
@@kadinelindsayart That has nothing to do with anti Blackness and everything ain't anti Blackness. It is not a requirement in cosmetology school to learn about Black hair. There's a minimum amount of information in those books dealing with textured hair. There are some stylists who don't care enough to further their education by paying to learn about Black hair care. The same way y'all get stuck on old remedies that granny taught you is the same way some of these stylists get stuck in doing things the way that they learned. That's how she detangles her own hair because that's how she was taught when she was younger. No one taught her to detangle hair like that.
@@amira_shmirayou’re right, some stylists only focus on what they’re taught and don’t try to learn further, so why aren’t we teaching about every hair texture? And why do think it’s okay to focus teaching on some rather than others? Every place will get multiple people with different race and textured hair, so why tf do yall think it’s okay for folks to pay for yall to half ass learn about some women’s hair. like this video states it’s a traumatizing experience that most women experience.
@@amira_shmirathat women was taught to detangle hair because she is in the job position of a professional who should be able to preform that simple beginning step. Im not sure if this is a sponsored hairstyle thang from a brand but they should atleast be listening and reading their customers comfort and taking their advice cause they’re in another person’s head.
Andddd if the stylist doesn't like her natural hair there's no way I'm going to let her in my head I don't trust people like that
This is the part that’s extremely important.
Am I crazy or is it crazy that redwig was saying they no longer conform to what is acceptable but was bewigged.
As a stylist, she could have at least made her wig look a little more natural, and purchased one that did not look so cheap. I mean it’s her profession. Put some effort into it lol
@@jenn4593 but she 'never found a curly wig she likes' . . even though she makes wigs herself.
The wig blindness on these two is insane!
I’ve walk out before mid appointment because the girl was so rough. Funny thing is she kept complimenting the health and length of my hair whilst simultaneously ripping it out. Yeah love it’s healthy because I treat it gently 😤
ok. I'm starting to feel better. I have walked out of a couple of salons. One time my hair was soaking wet, and I left. I was not embarrassed at all.
@@michelleeja412as have I. and would do it ahhh-friggin'-gain
the same exact thing happened to me. I left with soaking wet hair and 6 inches of breakage & split ends 😭
You are so stunning . Skin ✔️ bone structure ✔️ natural beauty ✔️
Right!! Her face is both beautiful and interesting.
This is why I do my hair on my own. I’ve always had bad experiences with hair stylists. Infact i stopped getting braids done because of this. It’s 2024, but some stylists keep disappointing us
It took broken edges for me to finally take my hair into my own hands. Haven't been to the salon more than 5 times in the last 7 years, and even then I do my treatments and trimming myself, and only allow them to braid
Same!!!
Same I stopped getting braids
@@c4tac133 I've shifted to shorter braids which aren't as heavy, and when I take them out I put my hair in twists instead of styling daily. This is a recent switch so hope to see some changes in length and thickness soon (always staying moisturising of course)
Damn, I felt that on the “prepping your hair before the appointment” section. I always fully detangle my hair before going to even a salon that I trust to blow out and trim my hair. But you’re so right, we shouldn’t have to do that. ESPECIALLY at these salon prices…
Hairstylist here....I think people SHOULD comb through their hair, not because I dint want to but because some people come with matted hair and want us to derange all that and compromise the time that was scheduled. Also, I do my best to consult with the client beforehand to know what I'm working with and the time needed to accomplish the service....
@@dkadwoa4114 correct. Some women come with hair that they haven’t detangled in weeks. And the detangling can go from a 20min service to an hour plus.
I feel your frustration 😮.
This is suppose to be relaxing and enjoyable but,
anytime you go to a 'specialist' and you have to teach them how to do their job, that's a problem. 😬
😭😭😭 girl… one thing i’m not doing anymore is silently suffering at the hands of others ❤️🩹
Exactly. I wish you would've not let them use you like a test dummy and get paid for it.
It's never the trustworthy people who feel the need to tell people "just trust me," because their actions do it for them.
I’ve left in the middle of an appointment because the hairdresser was so rough. Thankfully, I’ve now found someone that actually knows what they’re doing.
s/o to you for honouring yourself and your head top! even more happy you’ve found someone you feel safe to do your hair with 🥹 why is finding a good stylist harder than dating????
If in London, please share the details!
Please share the deets!
Ive found a natural hair salon that I loved. But booking is a nightmare. You have to call on the first of the month. At a specific time until you get through. Nonsense.
The way she's brushing you hair. YIKESS!!
🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲 yeah girl i had to cut it ✂️
When I was a loose natural, I never used a brush, just my fingers and a wide tooth comb.
She is starting from root to end as if she's ridding your ancestors' genetics from the follicle.
@@sharonmiller7213😂
@sharonmiller7213
That comment took me all the way out 💀 😂😂
Thanks for the trigger warning, because this is not a joke. This is actually making me so angry i could cry. I went natural because i hated the salon experience and i have only been to the salon a handful of times in the 15 years I have been natural. Even when i go to a natural salon, they always want me to have my hair prepped and detangled and charge a detangling fee for my very tightly coiled hair if it is not "detangled enough" (or "properly blown out" for braids). I am paying for a luxury service, I shouldn't have to do my hair before i get there and be treated like my hair texture is making their job so hard that i should be grateful with whatever experience/results. And i would never trust my natural hair to someone who is wearing a wig, degrading afros, looking at my hair confused while telling me to trust them and acting like I am the problem. (I know you didn't have a choice but it is making me so angry.)
OK Lauralyn was a complete 180. What a great experience. She saved the day.
S E E N 🩷
I'm so sorry this happened! I am truly amazed at your composure! I feel like I would've asked for the brush to show her how it's done. Why was she afraid of product???? Water and a product with some slip! Our hair is not unmanageable!! I detangle my super coily hair without any problems what the heck! I'm so glad you posted this. Is suchhhhh a real thing. I've heard so many wild stories. I'm glad it ended on a high note.
This also makes me think of a popular hair creator that hired someone for their wedding - not only did they switch their flight time (hella unprofessional) they were unprepared, andddddd used glue when it was requested several times that they not. Like they pushed the creators WHOLE WEDDING back...she didn't get to take photos with her soon to be hubby and bridesmaids because her hair stylist wasn't there! Ridiculous.
P.s I wanted to add I'm not suggesting what you should have done - only saying I would have been FEDDDDDD up omg. So sorry again 😩😩
I don't think of detaingling my hair is making the salon comfortable but more about making me comfortable. I do it bcus I want to not bcus they asked or need it done. It's kinda like rinsing dishes b4 putting them in a dish washer.
Let me just say I am SO proud of you for speaking up and having the confidence to communicate how you want you hair handled because this is why I don’t let stylist touch my hair. I’m extremely particular about detangling and not ripping through my hair. My hair is extremely coily and butt length and I have mastered how to detangle my hair so it makes perfect sense to tell the stylist how to handle MY hair. Some of them lead with egos and don’t was to be “told what to do” or corrected since they have a license. It’s a shame they are like this because it take ONE session to set you back years of growth. They are quick to blame you for their screw ups and is ready to cut all your hair off.
Mannnn...a word!....my last stylist blocked me didnt want to do it anymore!...my hair is headed to butt length and very thick...I used to get silk presses...its been 5yrs since I had one and my hair is sooo much more healthy doing it myself!..I miss my silky press but its ok...and im saving sooo much $$$.
I agree 100%
Never go to a stylist with a weave/wig if you have natural hair. I don't care if they swear on the Bible that they can do natural hair. LOL. Thank you for sharing your experience and exposing this place!! Your hair is so bomb on its own - they just don't know how to do our hair.
The entirety of thisssss 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
All of my clients are natural. You can still wear weave.
This is my rule in regards to my hair as well.
You know what. As someone who wears wigs mostly, I have to agree. When you wear wigs, you’re just not used to maintaining your natural hair texture on a day to day basis.
@@aisha691 💯 I’ve been natural for years but wore wigs and braids exclusively. It wasn’t until I ditched them this year and started to wear my hair out that I really began to understand it. It’s a completely different ballgame. I would never trust my hair to someone who was like I was wearing wigs and weaves all the time.
This is so sad, because unfortunately a lot of them don’t want to confront their own anti blackness. A lot of people will think I’m weird for this…but a girl in a wig or with a relaxer could never do my natural…that’s a BIG rule of thumb for me.
Also that lady with Red hair, has nasty energy, your not supposed do any hot oil treatment. It’s sad seeing things like this, because im à at home braider and constantly people down play the work I do and tell us how all the salon are better, when I remember going to salon, most of the aunties are anti black and out of touch. No matter if they washing your hair or not. Also people forgot we stopped washing peoples hair, because many naturals prefer to wash their own hair and use their own products. But we’re being demonized for it. Even though we’re doing braids for 12+ hours and not a damn relaxer.
Even all the relaxers and stuff coming back, is showing that ALOT of people NEVER dealt with their internalize anti blackness. The way people act like they’re taking this heavy weight off their shoulder by going to straight hair. Like people can keep gaslighting themselves that it’s just hair…but it isn’t really.
When she said she doesn’t think her hair texture suit her…I would’ve walked out tbh.
I’m so sorry you had this experience.
Lady in Red definitely has a negative vibe. It is triggering and reminds me of the times I endured it as a child.
IMO, the red weave woman was a little jealous of her healthy curly natural hair.
Hair trauma at the hands of other black women hits so different 😭. It’s 2024, there’s no excuse for hairstylists RIPPING out type 4 hair due to ignorance and or impatience . Then have the audacity to try and educate YOU in the midst of causing breakage and tangling. So sorry you had to go through that. Your new cut looks absolutely stunning ❤️
I love your attitude lmao, you were making them pick their self awareness/low self esteem issues apart, while you barely said anything at all. True definition of, silence speaks better than words😭 she was over explaining while she wouldn't wear her " natural hair at all" and you allowed that open space for her to vent almost to her self.
what an observation 🩷
Yeah, this is why I don't do hair salons lol. One traumatizing experience is enough. My last one was at a Dominican hair salon (I'm in NY) and that was over 10 years ago. Haven't been since. One other thing I noticed is that the stylist who was most knowledgable and gentle rocked her natural hair herself. Big key. The other two had weave / wigs and expressed some disdain for natural hair themselves. These women tend to have a lane and it's not natural hair.
soooo true!!!
The same here. I've been doing my hair now going on fifteen years.
i am also vexed she said "trust me" whilst playing in your head. honestly i'm watching this video through my fingers. i wish there was a known resouce where we could share reviews on salons nationwide so we could avoid "just trust me" people
yikes. where the tech gworls @??
The person in the back standing with her arms folded has me heated!!
this is the first time i’ve EVER seen a video of a black woman speaking up for herself in the salon and actively challenging anti-black & negative natural hair sentiments… YOU’RE AMAZING GIRL 🤎🤎🤎
The number of times I've had to tell hairdressers not to brush my hair with a rat tail comb is so crazy to me. And just like in the video I'm often dismissed " you know you have natural hair" huh!?
And it's more appalling because this is in Nigeria.
🫂🫂🫂 WE SEE YOU BABE 🩷
I was just thinking - come to Nigeria. Then I saw the end of your comment 😂😂😂
Before I got microlocs, I was a solicitor and advocate everytime I went to a "natural" hair salon in Nigeria. But that was way back in 2017. Many are much more knowledgeable now. Back then it was something else. I ended up avoiding all hair salons and then installed microlocs for myself and my daughter. Peace like a river 😅
This video displays such an important conversation I’ve found myself having in many salons. From having to advocate for myself to someone complimenting my texture and going on to telling me they themselves could never wear their own hair out because it doesn’t look “good”. Ugh, this video made me feel so many feelings but I am so happy you allowed us to have this conversation. Continue to advocate for yourself always. We love these types of conversations, even when they are hard ones to have.
🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷 can’t tell you how i procrastinated on this video in fear of having these types of conversations, but your comment makes it all worth it 🫂
It boggles my mind when people say their own hair doesn't suit them! Whaaaat!? How can that be? How cool it would have been for that lady to rock her afro, instead of dead-ass telling a client "my hair doesn't work for me"! Time to decolonize your hair baby!
I am so glad you recorded this 👏 It’s so sad because as black women we already get invalidated a lot by the world, but to get invalidated in black spaces by another black woman is another level of trauma and pain. But i was happy to see how the session ended and how you highlighted the positives!
Considering the mindset of the workers at the salon in regards to type 4 hair lowkey it's no wonder your experience was so triggering and they ripped your hair out. I hope one day we can leave these harmful mindsets in the past, it's 2024 :(
It truly is so upsetting when they gaslight you by giving you ‘tips’ assuming you don’t know how to take care of your own hair and insinuating that their lack of training is actually your fault. So uncomfortable.
It's crazy of them to act like your hair is a problem when it's just heaven-sent. You are absolutely gorgeous and that includes your hair.
I'm in a cosmetology school with predominantly Black student serving a predominantly Black community and I running into the same issues. Students and instructors not knowing how to handle natural hair, making snide comments, losing patience and being aggressive when detangling, etc. I feel like as Black people servicing Black clients we should do/know better.
I noticed how uncomfortable she was getting after realising you were standing your ground with not agreeing with her when she said an Afro/natural hair didn’t suit some people.
Stories like these are why I do my own hair. I have never been to a salon in my life. And if I ever decide to go to one, and the stylists are wearing wigs and talking about not liking their natural hair texture, I'm walking right out. They ain't laying a finger on me.
Yeah that big wig with a hat on top?? We can't even see what you're working with sis...shouldn't you be your own advertisement? Like, I'm definitely not getting a facial from someone who looks like they neglect their skin.
The tangle teezer is NOT for your hair. She could have dropped it and just used that denman. And where was the moisture!!! In many regards YOU were the expert on your hair! Also the final hairstylist needs to RETRAIN the other staff because that was unacceptable. You gave the appropriate trigger warning 😭
🥲🥲🥲
i actually really love the tangle teezer brush she was using, but i’m a lot more thorough with my detangling before using it + i don’t tug through ❤️🩹 it’s okay though, we live, we learn + we talk about it 🫂
@@MelaninMichie yes beautifully done and lesson filled video
I love a tangle teezer but I think she needed to add more product. Something creamy, not just water 😭
that part
The tangle teezer is a good tool on properly saturated hair. Where's the water? The conditioner?!
Ooooooh and they are professionals. Ooooh wow. The detangling man. It is so hard to stick up for yourself in a salon
No it's not hard to stick up for yourself in a salon. Just as you would not let someone you feel uncomfortable with continue to make you feel uncomfortable and gaslight you bcus they fall short, it's the same with your hair, it's not separate from your body it's grown from it.
@@aquafina6544 It IS hard when you're in an unfamiliar environment and outnumbered, just look at the video! They teamed up to gaslight her instead of listening!
I have had this experience many times and felt so defeated. I could be getting praised for my texture/length/thickness etc and in the same breath have my hair ripped out and see their visible frustration. Even though we are in 2024 I still don’t see a full force of change in salon experiences with textured hair. I wondered if maybe we need another viral phenomenon where you get asked “ curly babes what’s one thing you wanna tell your “natural hairstylist”?” I’ll start “ stop detangling my hair from the roots with a rest rail comb, stop praising and then self deprecating our natural hair in the same breath, stop saying you can do something when you, in fact, can not…”
I visited two "natural hair" salons in my home country and left with a throbbing scalp and my hair all over the floor. When I complained they tried to make me feel like I was being difficult.
🩷🩷 i hope you have had some positive experiences mixed in there somewhere too 🫂
Yes good ol gaslighting. I hate when they do that!
The title is all I needed to see to click immediately lol
😮💨😮💨😮💨😮💨😮💨😮💨😮💨
immejiately lol
Wow, this video was so triggering. I can relate MASSIVELY, as I've been dismissed similarly. It's so good that you shared this video, as it happens all the time but is not discussed enough. Plus, I agree re the comment about needing to prep before going to the salon -like why!!!! I'm paying for my hair to be done!!!
😮💨😮💨😮💨 i’m glad i put the trigger warning 🩷 safe safe on these STREETS, find yourself a good stylist and stick with her 🫂
Felt really proud of you for advocating for yourself. It was funny hearing them talk without realizing they have ways to go but I like that she apoligized at the end at the very least. At last, you looked gorgeous, imagine looking that beautiful in cornrows
Some apology! It gave "I'm sorry if you were offended" vibes IMO
@@SkyeID I didn't get that vibe in the moment but I know what you mean. My standards are really low when it comes to black hair salons lol, but you right thats not even a good apology
This is SOOO relatable. I feel like I lose hair every time I go to a black salon. And to make it worse, they have the nerveeeeee to get upset and rude when you speak up about them destroying your hairrrr! Whewwwwww. Im triggered lol but your hair style at the end was so beautiful though
the hair braider made me nostalgic of my old hair salon days 💗 now I do my hair myself because I cannot.
I'm going to keep it one hundred with you. The fact that most hair salons aren't gentle during detangling (or at all) is the very reason that I don't go to hair salons anymore. There are only 2 people who touch my hair. Me and my mom. Me because I will be gentle. My mom because she will listen to me if I tell her something hurts.
I wholeheartedly agree that it's a problem in salons and it should change and improve. But because I know how it is, I'm not about to give anyone the opportunity to jack my hair up. I think as much as it sucks (and as uncomfortable as it may be), there may be situations where you literally have to get up from the chair and not let them finish or just don't go to them in the 1st place. But that's my two cents though. 🤷
The girl with the red hair letting you know that you should “prep” your hair before going to the salon is crazy!!! And the “stylist” testing out your hair, using all these fantasy gadgets on your hair with no clue… ahhhh they really irritated me. That’s why I haven’t been to a salon for 7 years (I had locs). Glad all turned out great in the end 💖💐
I am just going to say this and get a lot of hate. Most black woman hate their hair. They prefer 4 hours of taking care of a curly/straight wig than taking care of their natural hair. Even the esthetic of the natural hair is not appealing to them. I understand blaming it on society and all, but at some point, we need to take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves if the expensive wigs, the glue, some of the so-called "protective styles" and all the other things that we do are just to protect or hide our hair.
No hate here. I agree that most blk women would prefer a different texture of hair (myself included) and I'll go along with the hiding aspect also. I don't think anybody has to like everything about themself. I hate spending hours to detangle my hair and opening my wallet for the pint of conditioner I need to put on it every time just to make that process less damaging. I love the look and the silkiness of my wavy wigs and the effortless way I can style them with water and mousse and be out the door without fearing if my products are gonna hold up or flake up. I don't have to squint nor reach for a needle because there's no single strand knots to seek and destroy. Personally, the time, money and effort needed to achieve a look with my 4c hair that I'm actually pleased with don't compare. And I say this without any shame as I'd rather be doing any activity that brings me happiness or teaches me something rather than the grudge matches I have to regularly endure just to maintain basic grooming. There are some who are completely opposite-- they revel in the self-care element/ love doing hair/are able to execute beautiful styles... and that's wonderful. It only becomes a problem when one side of the coin tries to belittle the other. I say wear your hair (or the hair you bought) however you like it, period.
@riceandramen I completely respect your viewpoint. Thanks for sharing. Do you think you prefer other textures because taking care of your hair was not a skill you were taught at a young age?
@@kharcasse5303as a reformed wig wearer, her comment is very painful to read. wigs are not more convenient or cheaper than natural hair, it’s just a widely accepted way to be lazy and not take care of yourself. if we be honest, you wouldn’t need a needle to detangle if you didn’t abandon your hair for 3 months under a wig.
@@riceandramenyou don’t want to open your wallet for a pint of £10 conditioner, but you can open it to pay hundreds for a wig, construction and installation, glue, mousse and hot tools?
@@tmimochaexactly. I think it’s that some people don’t see natural hair as worth investing time and money into.
I've seen this conversation happening online regarding US stylists, especially about hair braiders. Surprised but not surprised this is happening overseas as well. I feel like black stylists wish black women would go back to relaxers. My hair is very easy to detangle but it takes patience and knowledge.
I also think some wish we would go back to relaxers, so they try to discourage us. It doesn’t work on me. I’ve started doing my own hair; I just need to learn to trim it 😊
Not them gaslighting you when the problem was NOT your hair it was her detangling method 🫠🫠🫠... Well done for speaking up in such a graceful yet assertive way. Sorry this was your experience.
This really just highlights the difference between the actual hair stylists and the inconsistency in training. Salons need to vet who they have working for them more because based off of this video, I would never go there! But I went to the same salon with different hair stylists and loved my experience and actually somewhat restored my trust in the black hair salon experience. But, now I'm right back where I was. Such a shame!
couldn’t have said it any better. thank you Abbie 🩷
really glad you had a positive experience, which was definitely my cause with Lauralyn 🥹
it’s clear that the stylist ≠ the salon, so i’ll be definitely vetting out my stylists more in future 🫰🏾
Unrelated but I enjoy your videos Abbie, but so true what u said
I'm so sorry Michie this happened to you, you didn't deserve any of it. I wished she would have actually listened to you and adjusted accordingly. I am glad that in the end, you had a different experience. Thank you for sharing this video I hope you continue to flourish. 💜
💖💖💖
i can feel your pain sis, i just stopped going to the salon all together, because if you tell hem how to handle your hair properly, they are just gonna start giving you an attitude and the experience gets worse from there.
This is the exact reason why I have avoided salons my whole life. I went to a ‘black’ hair salon 2 years ago and it was clear they didn’t have a lot of experience with my hair texture. I asked for a wash and go and left with an undefined afro with HELLA flakes. Would love for the uk to have a RELIABLE and TRUSTED hair salon for 4c and 4b hair! I feel like the USA I’d defo leading in this space 😭
I relate SO HARD. There is definitely a lack of natural hair salons that are solely focused on natural haircare in the UK. I've honestly had to hold my tears in during some appointments😭. Most stylists here only care about styling (wigs, sew ins etc). I've my learned my lesson the hard way unfortunately.
I wish that were true about the US. I’ve had this very same experience in different states in various cities. I have found, if the stylists is wearing their own natural hair and it’s type 4 hair, the experience is much better.
The end result was bombbb! Love the off centre braid pattern
I resonate so heavily with the video. I had a horrible experience with a black hairdresser in Manchester (would love to name and shame but I’ll bite my tongue) a few months ago. She tore through my hair, caused pain to my scalp and even left me with a style costing over £100 but lasting less than 48 hours. I didn’t speak out then but I’m determined to never let myself go through something like that again
Im a stylist in Virginia, non-black latino and I love that you did this video because it really helps me understand the black experience behind the chair with so much more nuance.
I dont have your texture, so I can't ever fully understand, but it helps me understand better the things I can do to give my tight curl clients an overall better experience.
you are SO welcome 🥹 thank you for taking interest - i think i speak on the behalf of the community when i say that it means the world to us 🙏🏾
If my hairdresser tell me
That they Afro doesn’t work for her , I am leaving , she clearly doesn’t like to use her hair, so why I would let her touch mine , the only people will touch my hair are the people o love 4c hair
So glad you created this video Michie! The salon experience across the globe is a shame for us. When I went to Nigeria (where my family is originally from), they charged me EXTRA for being natural. It was absurd!!
This is why I detangle my hair at home before going to the salon😭😭I rarely go because black hair stylists don't care about your hair (At least the stylist I've encountered)...they don't care about how much work you put into your hair for it to look the way it looks they simply don't! They don't even listen when u try to tell them how you want your hair to be handled....I remember crying myself to sleep when a stylist damaged my hair beyond recognition🤢🤮 and did she ever apologize?, nope all she did was mock me about how I've lost my length.....I only go to stylist when I'm too lazy to to do my own hair or when a girl just wants to be pampered... anyway I'm happy that you're back I missed your content 🖤
I always detangle my hair at home before going to the salon. It is a must now
As a professional within this industry, I will begin by saying that, if you had to wait until the styling stage of your appointment to have an elevated experience, you have been failed. This is because the preparation, the cleansing, treating and drying are the most fundamental elements of your appointment. If your hair needs aren’t addressed at that stage, it is too late. Those are the stages for hair loss / damage prevention. There is still no curriculum for Afro hair within the National Vocational Qualification in the UK and it is at best inadequate level of education worldwide. Every professional needs to have the basic levels of qualification, the NVQ level 1,2 and 3 before touching anyone’s hair. In the UK, you do not need a license to practice in hairdressing . If you can obtain some sort of insurance policy, the local council will allow you to trade. There is an argument for those who learn on the job, some have learned from the best but have no scientific or formal underpinnings knowledge. The two elements, theory and practical, must be present to achieve high hair care outcomes. It is also unfortunate that we have come to accept such low standards of practice because our expectations have adjusted. If a professional hairdresser wants to, they can become exceptional at caring for Afro hair. They MUST have the desire to be committed, diligent and be prepared to invest heavily in the craft and clients must be prepared to pay for the skill and value. So long as we keep accepting such low standards of care for our hair, people will continue to provide to meet those low standards. I will be making lots of content for the hair care service users soon. I will be looking at some of the things to watch out for when visiting a professional, what their qualifications translate to for the client, how to find out if they have all the professional prerequisites to practice. I do sincerely hope my comment helps someone and as a proud member of this industry who is committed to driving excellence within this field, I’m sorry for your experience. 💚
Girllll your facial expressions dealing with these women😂😂😂 your hair is absolutely beautiful!
I'm currently back home in South Sudan, and I'm really annoyed right now. I went natural last year and I found a wonderful salon in London. They did such a wonderful job with my natural hair and helped me appreciate my hair again. I recently braided my hair and one side has broken off....because this silly tart of a woman tugged at the hair and twisted my hair, so when i tried to undo the braids, my hair broke. I've been avoiding going to the salon here for a few days because i need someone who will be gentle on my hair. Usually, South sudanese are gentle on the hair, but the woman who did my hair wasn't South sudanese. When i braided my hair last time, the braids were well done with no issues whatsoever.
Wish me luck, i hope i find someone who is gentle on my hair tomorrow. Our hair requires a gentle touch, i honestly don't know why people are so rough!
For those who live in London, the salon that I go to is PurelyNatural in Stratford. It's amazing.
I've decided to just blow dry my hair before going to a stylist. I literally had 1 salon I trusted to wash my hair & the owner greeted my partner, but NOT me when I ran into her. Then posted a subliminal about "I only greet people I know, I don't owe you anything" on FB within the hour. I stopped going to her after that. I was a regular at her place! I haven't had a professional trim since (2019). I've taught myself to do it. But it sucks that we cannot relax at a random salon because of our type 4 hair.
Your face when she was pushing this brush through your hair is the definition of “silence talk”
Why do you have to do stuff before going to the salon. And her body language looks defensive. Just offer a good full service
I remember my experience of multiple people tugging on my hair from different sides, getting oil in my eyes, and feeling overstimulated and ignored. Not to mention they laughed when I cried 🥲 the hair salon is definitely the last choice for me now
You are absolutely beautiful. For me, I purposely find beautiful black women who embrace their natural features (like you) and I imitate them - instead of those who frequent long weaves, lashes, and loads of makeup. Because of this, I continue find new and innovate ways to upkeep my natural beauty. Blessings to you.
I'm loced; had microlocs for 5 years now, so I don't know how CZcams decided this was a good video suggestion, but when I saw the SKIN!!! 😍😍😍 I clicked with the speed 😂 Sis needs to take that pro-tip and shove it where the sun don't shine. MY first trigger was seeing two black women standing around you with straight hair (that isn't theirs) but servicing another black woman in a "natural hair salon". Let's just say that after having to take care of my own hair and advocate for myself in black-owned NATURAL hair salons for 2 years, discovering microlocs was a blessing.
Side note - girl you're freaking GORGEOUS 😍 💖 💕 ✨️
Wish I could send a VM instead of typing, cos this will be long. Take this from the mother of a genuine 4c black little girl - save your coins, go buy you the biggest tub of raw shea butter you can find on the market, buy a bag of frozen okra (or fresh, doesn't matter) chop it up, boil it till it bubbles over and thickens, strain the juice add it to a blender with the shea butter and whip till it's smooth and fluffy. That's all the pre-poo and post shampoo treatment you need. Your hair is about half the length and three quarters the fullness my daughter's hair was before I installed her microlocs. I swear by the RAW shea butter and okra juice combo. Your comb will glide through. If it doesn't, come back here and call me any names you can think of 😂😂😂
@@hawtnsweetDoes this concoction smell weird?
@antoinettenyuurnibe3302 okro has no smell really. Think the smell of parsley kind of. Raw shea butter smells kinda earthy and might take getting used to. But a way around it is to add a few drops of your favourite essential oils.
Fellow loc girly 🫶🏾that was also triggered by this video 😢 even starting my locs in a natural hair salon was traumatic. I’ve gotten two professional retwists in the four years since and thankfully both were better but I definitely wish this was not a norm for black women.
The way I would’ve got up and left the shop. I’m so glad you recorded this.
Fr though i would cry when i get home. The attitude alone! It's giving " you are yapping too much so therefore i won't detangle that section anymore"
Short story but a true experience
Years back when i knew nothing of natural hair care, i went to a salon to get my hair done. The lady kept combing my hair roughly (mind you i was 17) and it was hurting me badly. I pleaded with her that she should be gentle, it was giving me a headache and guess what she told me
Let me type it in her words
"Its not my fault. You are the one that want to keep natural hair so deal with it"
She said this to my face. Back then i was still young and clueless. Did a big chop at 18 I'm 21 now, my hair close to waist length and i haven't been to the salon in 2+ years. Everything i know now, it was self learning. Till date, i do not allow anyone with negative energy touch my hair. Because at the end of the day, no one really cares about you the way you do. Never had a good salon experience.i wish i would but I'm way past that now. I'm pretty sure no hairstylist will be able to tolerate me giving them corrections lol someone's gonna get mad and rip out my hair. So I'm just staying clear🙂
5:39 no ma’am. I’ve been in the salon, and actually told them I was detangling my hair myself. I am very, very particular about my hair and I’m blessed to have a wonderful hairdresser, but even with her, I’m very particular. Even if she misses rinsing my hair with cold water, I speak up and say something. Advocate for yourself!
I think … I’m going to normalize mustering courage to just get up out of hair stylists chair and thank them for trying ; but advise that they are damaging my hair and I will not be continuing with the service … this will be a challenge for me and this will be hard but I will work to do it if this salon experience ever happens to me as well again (it had happened many a time to me) thank you for taking one for the team but I am so sorry this happened to you .
Why do brown hairstylist girlies think tangle teaser brushes are made and magic for detangling all hair types !! 😭😭 use wide tooth combs and small sections!
Why in the world would I come to the hair salon with a hot oil treatment the day before ? You are absolutely right! That’s just laziness on the stylist part. I would never come here. They should have detangling agents on deck after identifying the texture of the client like castor oil water , pattern beauty detangling nectar maybe or miche beauty’s pre poo .. this is so crazy…
I have actually done this. Or just brushed my own hair in the salon and asked for a discount. That was 3 years ago and I haven't been back. I've only been 4 or 5 times in my life and hated every time bar one and that was a white textured hair specialist...
@@koyaharvey-walker3794 oh wow ! I’m proud of you for doing that! I never thought to ask for a discount that makes sense ! And Thats crazy sis 😭 im sorry that happened to you . Its a shame majority of us cant have good . experiences with our own people in salons. I have only had good experiences at the Ouidad salon in NYC which my sister put me on to in my mid 20s . But before being loyal to Ouidad ? Same horrible experience of not properly detangling at the ends first verses starting mid shaft . A mess ! I always wondered if these stylists are losing money because more naturals are opting to just doing their own hair or buying their own wigs .
Michie, I am so sorry this happened to you. I have never wanted to jump through a screen and just slap someone's hand so much. The stylist was so condescending. If you have to do your hair before the appointment, why go? That's a waste of money. All she needed to do was water your hair, use a detangler, emulsify and comb from the bottom upward. How can they be saying on one hand that its wild how many people have horror stories but in the same breath disregard your concerns and handle your hair so terribly. It's literally triggering to watch. Black hairstylists perpetuate so much texturism and anti-blackness, I am tired of it. Many deserve to be out of business and/or boycotted. Maybe this makes me strict, but I will not go to any natural hairstylist who does not wear their natural hair exclusively. Because if you do not like your hair or wear it, why would you treat mine with kindness or care? Also, the lady with the red hair saying she has no hair texture - she needs a hair detox and her hair is over oiled. (But that's neither here nor there) And natural hair suits everyones head which it comes out of. PLus there are many quality kinky wigs, so the point about if she can find a good one is non-existent because she is not look for those wigs. The lead hair stylist ate. She needs to rehire some new stylists though.
My stomach was hurting watching the way she was raking through your hair. I cut off my locks after 20 odd years and went to the salon. The way the woman was SNATCHING through my virgin hair solidified why I never returned. Recently I went to a small salon where the sink was in the broom closet and I had to step over a dirty mop and since I had removed my glasses, I wasn’t sure if the bowl sink was clean. They stylist also kept stepping over a plug of hair on the floor instead of sweeping it up. I was the only client there so she wasn’t swamped. I’ve never really felt a real transformative salon experience tbh.
Is the stylist in a synthetic headband wig?
Looks like it! Yikes 😬
😢😢😢
Situations like this are the reason that I do my own hair: I try my best to create my own luxury salon experience at home (gentle defanging, top tier products, relaxing environment, etc). I’ve watched so many “head spa” treatments from Japan and other Asian countries that I thought to myself, “Why can’t type 4 and 3C ladies have these types of salon experiences, where every move is comforting and the goal is to make you & your hair feel elevated during your entire time in the chair?” So I do that for myself: wash day is around 3+ hours for me, but I feel fabulous and my hair looks really great in the end. True self-care … It’s worth the time & effort.
watching the first part and then the part with Laurelynn was so lovely cause whew i was stressed outt and then the way you can tell she cares for your hair and your opinions, first lady was like she needed it done asap but with Laurelynn she genuinely took her time and in the long run that is how customers stay not from speed but from the quality
i have always said this - how i hate people feeling like they should make me pay them hundreds of dollars to PLAY in my hair!? idgi!? the anxiety of going to a salon is of its own entity bro. i see you. i understand you. this is a valid and real experience and you're right - so many of us have endured this for way too long. black women are expected to "endure" even what's sold as a "luxury" experience and it brings me to literal tears. ily.
You are sooo gorgeous. Your hair and dimples 😍😍😍. With that said, im sooooo sorry about your experience. The detangling was atrocious, she was just raking it was harshly and not even listening 🙁
i had my hair professional colored by my very close friend’s sister (she is Black and Creole but it wasn’t an all Black salon). It came out amazing. The following year I came to do my roots and she destroyed my hair with bleach to then dumped dark brown on it (i went for blonde highlights). This was at a very nice and higher end salon. She did this because she wanted me to divulge her in gossip about her sister’s dating life which i refused to participate in. It was so traumatizing to see my curls so damaged and tangled and at the same fkn brown color. 💔
But that experience led me to a new type of stylist and salon. I go to ceremonial hairstylist who fuses well-being, love, and culturally relatable space for me - she’s Indigenous Mexican and she cleanses me with copal incense and I can speak to her about how I feel about my hair and the spiritual relationship I have with my hair. First time I wasn’t laughed at or had eyes rolled at me by a stylist for discussing this. You actually have the entire salon to yourself so that it’s very private and intimate. My first visit, i cried my heart to her and she told me i am beautiful and she is honored help me feel the beauty in my hair again. I had to chop off inches and i rocked a shorter cut which i thought didn’t suit me but that journey made me realize i could have very short or even no hair and I’m still beautiful. The salon is “Keep Your Crown Right” in SoCal and that amazing woman was gifted by God to shape ALL, waves, curls, coils, and kinks
Anyways, i am happy to see you smile and enjoy your style at the end of the video💖🫶🏾
I've literally stopped going to the hair salon because of the black hair salon experience. Glad you addressed this topic
This was traumatising to watch. I actually had tears in my eyes. Brought back bad memories. I’ve not stepped foot inside a hair salon in time and this reminded me why. Thanks for posting the video. It needs to be shown to all trainees. Also, you looked beautiful with your canerows. ❤
Kudos to you for being brave enough to share your concerns. Someone else would've kept quiet and never visited again.
Thanks for shedding light on this real life issue. As a Canadian, the hunt for finding a proper natural hair stylist is rough out here. I had to learn the hard way- If the stylist herself doesn't have healthy hair, dont even bother sitting in that chair.
I've had stylist CUT inches off my hair when I requested only a trim, over bleached my hair on multiple occasions, over processed my kertain treatment which lead to chunks of my hair falling out! Braided too tight that it caused the strands to prematurely fall out... all while expecting you to still pay and overcharge for their mishaps!
These days, im so traumatized and disappointed in the level of unprofessionalism and lack of quality among black hair stylist.
Also I want women to be VERY CAREFUL of hair envy among these hair stylist- they will butcher you on purpose. It's just wise at this point, to learn to style and do your hair yourself 😮💨
Yeah this video reminded why I also don't like to go to the hair salon. Why is is so common for hair stylists to expect us to prep our hair beforehand. And then leave feeling bad about your hair. Ahhh yeah this video triggered me. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experience
the way she was detangling your hair was sending shivers down my spine 😭 this salon is not it
Omg, I'm only halfway through and this is making my skin crawl. I'm so sorry you had to experience this! I have been there several times and have also felt the apprehension of needing to speak up for myself. But yes, I hate when salons claim to do natural hair and then you get there, and it's clear they are so far removed working with highly-textured strands that they have no idea what they're doing. It's awful when you feel your hair is worse off after going than before you went in.
OMG! the woman at the end was fantastic, we def need more of her to help us with healing from and trusting black hair salons because every experience I have had has been like the first 3 quarters of the video... I am unfortunately used to being dismissed and experiencing texturism esp in natural hair salons, very disheartening
I’m from nyc and I used to go to the Dominicans to get my hair done but as I got older I had to stop going. It felt like they didn’t know how to properly treat hair (but if you speak Spanish or they personally like you, they’ll definitely give you a better experience), the lack of care that goes into properly detangling hair is beyond me. I’ve been doing my own hair for about 10 year now and only occasionally go to a salon to get my ends trimmed when I can’t do it myself. It’s either you find a hairdresser you truly trust or just do your own hair, there’s no in between honestly. Your hair is beautiful and I’m sorry you had to go through this, it’s so frustrating for us natural hair girlies to get proper treatment at salons.
Thank you for sharing this video. I stopped relaxing my hair in the 90s; and bad salon experiences are still the norm. The need for us to educate our stylists, followed by their refusal to accept that we're more knowledgeable about our hair than them, then having to recover from damage created by the salon is so frustrating, such a waste of time, and sickingly expensive that we're better off prepping our hair ourselves and only paying for the services we're confident in their ability to execute. Stylists need to invest time and money in learning how to care for our hair with the same degree of intentionality and commitment they dedicate to learning eye-catching or trendy hairstyles. Thanks again for sharing.
6:50 10000% correct...I've been to alot of salons and I don't take back chatter. I tell them what I want and if they can't they know I'm not afraid to start stepping because I'm the customer. If I was not a 4c gal then they wouldn't be saying anything....
Good for you for addressing this. I would say directly and absolutely, if the stylist doesn't wear HER hair in a natural style, STAY AWAY from her. They ALL say they know what they are doing. It's a lie and they are too embarrassed to admit it. A stylist who wears a natural hair style either knows how to do it or knows someone who does. Someone on the street wearing their natural hair the way you like is the best person to get recommendations from. Random doesn't work for us. Hint, Black men don't do that much to their hair, Black women shouldn't either. Salons are cute, but they aren't our jam. Consider how they make their money. The more they do to your hair, the more they get paid. BEWARE. Stay beautiful, stay natural. Much love!
This is so unfortunate. Why are black customers expected to à la carte and DIY most of their haircare BEFORE going to the salon?
I’m getting married next weekend and people keep asking why I’m not going to a stylist. This is why. It would be cool to visit a salon if I were recommended a particular stylist who was really tender and gentle with 4c hair.
I can relate to this completely!! Leaving w my hair severely damaged. Tons of shedding etc and I always feel like I sit there and endure the trauma.
the place looks so lovely too🥲
Truly truly bless you for the bravery it took to 1. speak up for yourself in such a scary moment 2. bring us into this super vulnerable, very relatable, not talked about enough moment and 3! To be brave enough to hold oneself accountable with grace to say "This was a moment where I didn't advocate for myself, but with self love, I know better." The growth is inspiring and this was truly a mirror into how I would sit in the chair just soooo sure they knew MY HAIR more than me. Whew! Keep being great love. So proud of you.
🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 this means a lot 🩷 thank you
I learned many years ago to have a consultation with the hairdresser and look at their hair before letting them proceed with any shampooing, conditioning,etc. 🧐
This just shows the reality of “speaking up” as a black woman,. They tell us to self advocate and that people cannot read our minds. Okay sure. Then when you do you may still be ignored or dismissed. That doesn’t mean don’t speak up, but when giving that advice provide the caveat that you may be completely disregarded anyway.
Because we're afraid to talk about how so many of us(Black women) treat each other in general.
That's really where the conversation needs to start.
🎯 💯
No, if the energy isn't right, you're not doing my hair. Do not snatch or break my hair off. I will walk out !! And that's on period 💯
Thanks for uploading and highlighting this issue. I’ve had bad experiences at the salon for the longest time. I stopped going and did my own hair for 11 years . Last year I did a lot of research on a particular salon for natural hair. I left with my hair damaged despite me constantly interjecting to advise them on how I handle my hair as they had no clue!!! I was ignored and left with damaged hair and £100’s of pounds lighter. The salon ignored me when I told them they’d damaged my hair and I wanted a conversation on what went wrong and a full refund. 10 months later I am currently negotiating a settlement after taking my case to a solicitor. I’m never going to a salon again it’s going to take years to get my hair back to the same health & length.
Honnnnney... Lauralynn saved ALL of us. Michie, Thank you for taking us on this journey with you.
Its so sad🥲, but the last hairstylist gave me hope