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Losing a dog is like losing a family member
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- čas přidán 15. 08. 2024
- Why does losing a dog feel like losing a family member? The way we attach to dogs is similar to the way we attach to humans. The challenge is to mourn the loss of a dog the same way we mourn the loss of a human. I try to do that here by remembering Mwaji.
Special thanks to Elizabeth S., Tyler D., Anna H., Arnt J., Collin P., Evan A., Imran M., Sam D., Ryan L., Sophie Y., Ahmed Y, Israel P., Neuro Transmissions, Eric E., Eve P., Lauren K., BrainCraft, Aaron F., Samuel H., Marisa H.,Tae T., Steve M.,, Bryan T., Nicky C., Samuel A., Anton T., Jennifer C., Shanda W., Saleem H. P., Sri S., and Alex N. for making this episode possible! Learn how you can help me make The Psych Show and get exclusive behind the scenes access in return at / thepsychshow .
Topics discussed:
* Mourning the loss of a dog
* Disenfranchised grief
* Attachment to dogs
* Bereavement
Learn more:
* The death of pet can hurt as much as the loss of a relative: www.washington...
* A pet’s death can hurt more than losing a fellow human: www.popsci.com...
* Oxytocin-gaze positive loop and the coevolution of human-dog bonds: science.scienc...
* Grieving Pet Death: Normative, Gender, and Attachment Issues: journals.sagep...
* Pet loss: Issues and implications for the psychologist: psycnet.apa.or...
* Why losing a dog feels like losing a family member: • Why losing a dog feels...
* When my dog died, I didn’t understand why it felt like a human had died. Then I read the research: www.vox.com/20...
* Coping with the loss of a pet: www.avma.org/p...
Connect with Ali:
Twitter ► / alimattu
Facebook ► / thepsychshow
Instagram ► / alimattu
Snapchat ► / alimattu
Patreon ► / thepsychshow
Email ► ali@thepsychshow.com
Website ► alimattu.com/
THE PSYCH SHOW! Creating mental health videos that educate, entertain, and empower! Produced, written, and edited by clinical psychologist Ali Mattu, Ph.D. All videos are provided for informational purposes only and do not constitute clinical advice.
If you or someone you know needs help immediately, you should take one of the following actions:
- call 9-1-1 in the United States or your country's emergency number: en.wikipedia.o....
- call the Lifeline at 1-800-273 TALK (8255) in the United States or a global crisis hotlines: www.iasp.info/r....
- text START to 741-741 in the United States or visit chat.suicidepre......
- go to your nearest hospital emergency room
Lost my do last week. I’m a 42 year old 200 pound man, and I cried for 2 days. No shame in grieving for your fur babies. I miss her more than I can stand.
So sorry for your loss, does it ever get better? I just lost my best friend two days ago and I can’t stop crying my heart is completely broken.
If you are struggling with the loss of a dog, please look at the resources in the description to this video.
First of, I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you so much for sharing your story, you have no idea how much I needed to hear this. I had to put down my 15 year old pup three months ago. I'm devastated but she inspired me, even after she is gone, and I'm am planning on making awareness of this topic. I'm cuently studying psychology and I've noticed that even in this field there is still not enough attention brought to pet's grief. Again, thank you for your words. You gave me reminded why I want to make my final thesis on this particular subject. RIP Sniffy 2004-2019, you will always be loved and remembered.
I’m fixing to have to put my baby to rest. I am a nervous heartbroken wreck. He’s been by my side for the last 13 years. Idk what to do
My childhood dog passed away last year during the height of the pandemic and it just felt wrong to be upset about her death (she was 12 almost 13 years old) when thousands of people were dying from Covid. I went to my online graduate school zoom class the next day, did not say anything even when people ask how my weekend was. I did not tell anyone for a long time. The only other people (my family) who understood and were also grieving lived far away. So I repressed and ignored all my feelings because it seemed insensitive and over blown to what was happening in world. Anytime I would start to feel things about her death, I would almost automatically feel guilty. I'm not sure if this is disenfranchised grief? but might explain this past year for me. Thank you.
My dog died in 2016, a month after my sixteenth birthday and three monthss before his eighteenth birthday. He was older than me but younger than my sister and my family and I often joked that he was the middle child, my older brother. It truly felt that way.
With his age his health obviously started getting worse and we've been trying to ready ourselves for his death for years prior to it. He finally got a fairly harmless stomach virus but because of his age it really got to him. He had trouble simply walking, he couldn't sometimes even get up by himself.
We always spent so much money on him - the vet, items, food, medicine - because he was part of our family. We obviously tried our best to get him back to health but he was too old to survive this. So we decided to put him down because we knew just in how much pain he was even if he tried to hide it and keep on wagging his tail.
I'm a person that doesn't really cry - it's not that I hold the tears in, I just simply don't react so strongly to negative emotions and I usually physically can't get out more than two tears. I never cried so much and so hard as in the moment our dad came back without him and telling us that he's resting now. I didn't even cry at any of the funerals of my other family members but after our dog's death I was crying nonstop for three days straight. I'm close to crying again as I'm typing this and I have cried many times before whenever I thought about him too much or had a dream with him in it.
I think that it hit me so hard since he was the closest *person* in my life that I had left. My family could never give me the same level of comfort as he did and I never had any friends in real life ever since after we moved cities.
People that never had pets or never had a strong connection with them can't understand what it's like when you're mourning the death of yours. They think it's so easy to just replace them or that all they were was a teddy bear that you had to feed and clean after. I never had the chance to properly deal with my grief which is probably why I'm still so emotional and sensitive to the topic.
I can still remember the day when we put him down, just a few hours before that, he was laying on the carpet in my room while facing the mirror. He opened his eyes, looked up and saw my reflection and weakly wagged his tail. He was so happy to see me there with him, he loved me so much and I loved him equally as much back.
I hope you, your wife and your friends can mourn Mwaji's death in peace and comfort and I hope you get better.
Thank you for sharing your experience, Cameron. I identify with a lot of what you experienced as well. A lot of people can also have a hard time with end of life care for dogs as there just aren't as many options as humans and so often the only option is putting them down. Mwaji might have benefited from heart surgery but that wasn't an option for her in New York City. I hope this video also brought back some fond memories of your dog. Thank you again for being so forthcoming in your comment. Reading it made me feel less alone.
In a strange way it makes it even harder when you've seen combat and you loose an animal. You've seen people who are less deserving to be on this planet than your dog but your dog is given such a short time here on earth. We had to put my service dog down and it nearly killed me. My heart genuinely goes out to you and your friends over the loss of your beloved fury friend. All dogs go to heaven 😭
Michael Caudle so true man!! In my opinion it hurts much worse. I lost my Buckee my 8 year old dachshund to renal failure back in September 2018. Making the decision to put him to sleep was the hardest thing I've ever dealt with. Living alone my dogs were always there for me, through the worst of times, even when my own human family members weren't. It was by far the hardest grief pain I've ever experienced.
Last night I lost my dog, Max. He was 12 years old and in 4 months would have been 13. This video really did help me feel not alone during my grieving process. Thank you so much
I always heard that it's harder to lose an animal we love than a person because pets are givers of unconditional love. My husband and I lost our sweet kitty cat little bit after our daughter was born. My husband got hit with it way harder than me. It helped him navigate some repressed emotions of his grandmother who had passed earlier that year. We still in some ways grieve our Sterling and talk of him fondly. I hope your hearts are get some healing ❤️
I'm sorry for your loss as well. You're right - pets give such unconditional love AND they're so dependent and innocent. I'm glad to hear your husband was able to grow from the experience and also work through other grief he had been struggling with. Glad to hear you are keeping the memory of Sterling alive ❤
Brother I just lost my lady... 7 years together and today she was hit by a truck. My god my heart is broken... Thank you for sharing this. When people say dogs or cats don't have a soul... I can tell you that they do I saw the lights go out in her eyes... It was like her spirit left. We will see them again I believe...
Losing a pet is not "like" losing a family member. It just "IS" losing an immediate family member. Whether other people understands it, or not, does not matter. And the longer you have lived together, the more devastating losing them becomes. My condolences.
Thank you for your rawness, honesty, and unmasked reality. My immediate reaction, within the first 3 minutes was to offer a hug...comfort. Perhaps not the best reaction from a clinical perspective, but the most human response I can muster without turning into a sobbing mess myself.
Thanks for your support and the virtual hug, Michael!
I think hug is one of the response! Hug Ali!
Losing a beloved pet is no different to losing a human being that you love, the pain is exactly the same & it never goes away.
Going through that grief right now. Our beloved Coco passed away very suddenly. I found her on the floor, shaking as if she were having a seizure, and gasping for breath. This just happened a couple of weeks ago. Our hearts are completely broken. She was the greatest dog we have ever owned. She was our child, since we are empty nesters. I'm sorry for your loss. Listening to your story and your feeling of grief was like you knew my story, too. Thanks for sharing. It made me feel less alone to know someone truly understands.
Thank you for making this video. When my cat passed away a few years ago, my friends and family made my insufferable grief feel invalidated. Your video brought some peace to mind: pets really are family and it's perfectly normal to mourn for them.
It means a lot to me that this video brought you some peace. Thank you for sharing this in your comment!
@@drali Why do you say only losing a dog is like losing a family member? I lost my cat and my grief is painful beyond belief. Dogs are not the only kind of pet, you know.
I lost my cat last week he was only 3 from a blood clot I’m so upset sad lost heartbroken 💔
@@mcmlxii4419lost my beloved cat 🐈 can’t go on without him
I feel your pain... we miss our Pennie every single day and it’s gonna be a year in June since she’s crossed the rainbow bridge. Hope you all get the comfort you need to get through at this tough time. Much much love.
Thank you so much! I'm sorry to hear we both share this pain. I don't think there's anything that will fill in the absence she's left behind. But I will do everything I can to keep her memory alive.
Put my dog down today. Looking for videos tonight to help me heal. I love your other videos and was so happy to watch this one. Thank you for your honesty.....we’re all in the same boat here, aren’t we? Much love to you, brother.
I lost my best friend Brooklyn on May 8, 2023 and he was the best dog ever. I cry several times a day and I lack sleep. It is hard to come home after work to an empty apartment. I am employed in the mental health field as well. We need to support our friends, family members and colleagues who have said goodbye to their pets. Companies need to include time off for employees when their trusted pet has died.
Oh my god... I tried to not cry... It didn't work... This is beautiful. Sending love and positive vibes.
Thank you for validating the intense pain of losing someone who meant so much. Just last week we made the gut wrenching decision to spare our dog, Pooh the pain and suffering he was going through from dementia and terrible arthritis and neurological issues. Hardest decision of my life, so far anyway! No one asked when my brother died if I would get another one. I have another dog. I also have another brother. Though I love and adore them, the fact that I still have them does nothing to diminish the pain of losing the ones that are gone. They were both irreplaceable loved ones who will be missed forever.
When I lost my dad it didn’t hurt like when I lost my pup. I would trade anyone for me
Thank you. Needed this today. 😢 Lost my pet soul mate four days ago an so am struggling. Others do not understand my heartbreak or grief. I felt yours, connected with it and allowed mine to feel normal. 💔
Thank you, Ali for making this video.
I know my comment is a little late compared to your video but your video just speaks to me on a personal level.
Just today evening the 6th of September 2023 I lost my beloved 4-year-old toy poodle Joshua. Out of all the videos about pet loss I could find yours was the most detrimental and the most real for me.
Joshua was my world ,he was my boy and I loved him like a mother would love her child. He was given to me as a gift on my 10th birthday and I remembered when I first got him he was the light of my life, when I first held him up in my hands I just knew it was love at first sight.
Just this evening he had passed away because of a random out of nowhere illness and I am still in the process of grieving him.
When he was taken into surgery, the Vets had warned us that the mortality rate would be very very low and the fact that his death is a very very real possibility ,and made sure that we would have to make mental preparations if the worst does happen. For the first couple of days after his surgery he was on track for a study recovery, but around the fourth day after surgery he had weekend significantly and the Vets had also told us that he was showing signs that his life might come to an end sooner or later. We went to visit him daily because we knew at the back of our heads that he wouldn't be on this Earth for maybe 2 weeks and it just broke me.
On the day of his death I got a text from my father that Joshua had passed away in his sleep during one of my classes. Although I had already made some preparations for his death I was still somewhat shocked, I wouldn't say I was exactly sad or upset I just felt, at that moment, so, empty and Hollow.
I wouldn't say his death was sudden but his illness did spread out of the blue it was at first quite a normal digestive problem that could be easily fixed but it turns out it was much, much worse than expected. When we drove him to the vet we really just expected to get him some medicine maybe let him stay there for a couple days and all would be fine and go back to normal. But now sitting here typing this 2 weeks later after his first vet visit and now 9 hours after his death. This is very very surreal. To say I am at peace or to terms with his death would be a lie because I am not. This might be the worst feeling I have ever experienced in my 14 years of living. Although I was prepared to expect that loss and grieving would be hard, I had never it would have imagined to it to be this empty and Hollow and the worst of all without my support with me.
Out of all the videos about pet loss that I could find, your video, Ali spoke to me on a personal level especially about Mogi and your experience with her at the vet. Even though I'm aware that nothing could have possibly helped Joshua from his fate, I am still very upset at myself for letting him live such a short life. Most videos that I have watched were about childhood pets, which are usually 9 years old and above, which makes me doubt my ability as an owner and doubt my ability to love Joshua. Your video has still given me a small amount of closure about his death. I still have a long way on my journey to come to terms with the passing of my best friend but you has given me a small part of closure and for that I thank you so so much. Rest in peace ,Joshua , you will always be my sweetest boy
Thank You for sharing this. Our sweet Boxer Boy Mic passed away on Friday...he was 12 years and 9 months old to the day...most boxers only live 8-10 years, so we are VERY grateful for the extra time we got with him...but, man...we've been married 16 years and he was part of our family for nearly 13 of those. We moved into this house when we was a few months old...he was a HUGE part of this family...our history in this home always included him. My son said "Mic was our constant...if you moved the furniture or painted walls or people changed rooms, moved in and out(I have four sons and as they grew they fledged and things changed)...Mic would always be the same...always greeted us at the door when we came home...always there. As he got older he slowed down, but still...you could count on his presence...Now, every day I wake up and expect to hear his toenails at the top of the stairs waiting for us to come up...and he's not there. Our other pets are grieving...my younger kids are grieving. My heart hurts. Yet, tonight when cancelling(or rather just letting them know I would not be there) a typical weekly group we gather with...I felt silly telling them I just needed to be home and quiet. I'm grieving...honestly, in some ways this is WORSE than when I lost my Dad because I didn't LIVE with my Dad...we lived states apart and I didn't see him much...this is an every day constant loss. So hard. Anyway, thank you for sharing.
I just came across your video. Thank you for the raw emotions and your heart felt love for Mawji. I just lost my dog of 14.5 years to a heart murmur and a failing liver because of the meds….he had a special diet which I cooked, had supplements and was as holistic as I possibly could be. The last 2-3 years were difficult as I was in denial…and had to muster up my strength to be there for him. He passed on May 2, 2023 in my home. This is what I wished for and he gave it to me….I cry everyday now especially in the mornings and at night. I am heavy in bereavement and wonder how long it will last….he was my baby in this lifetime for sure! 💕🐶💕
It's been over a year now since my dog died and I thought things would be better over time. I don't think I've fully faced it yet, but seeing you tell your story has made me feel less alone in my situation. Thank you for posting this video.
I'm really sorry, Ali. I went through something similar with my sibling's cat last year, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Obviously every situation is different, and I'm not saying I know what you're going through right now, but I know how much this can hurt, and I'm sorry.
We lost our 12 year old Lhasa Apso two days ago. He wasnt himself and we took him to the vet. They discovered an abnormal mass and during surgery we had to have him put to sleep. I can say it has been the single worst experience of my life. My last memory of seeing him alive is asking him from the car to stay strong. I'll never forget the wee guy, he was like my best friend. The grief is quite overwhelming at times and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
I feel this horrific grief after losing my 14 year old Maltese Shitzu a month ago tomorrow. I actually lost my father earlier this year but nothing feels as painful as losing my baby dog. Every thing I do - i think of her. Every step i take - I can see her standing there. She looked very much like Maji.
I just lost my sweet boy Max in Sunday morning to a tragic death, the neighbor’s Pitbull attacked him and I am devastated. Not only do I feel so much guilt because I feel to blame but I keep reliving the experience.
He tried so hard to stay with us and made it through his surgery but shortly after passed away.
I love Max so much, the pain is unbearable. He was the sweetest little dog I’ve ever known and didn’t deserve this. I don’t know what I’m going to do without him. :(
I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you get better soon.
I also started crying because I started thinking about my own dog. My boyfriend also started crying... I wish you and your wife and Mwaji’s owners all the best!
Thank you so much for your support. Give your dog a big hug from me!
You’re very welcome! And I will I promise :-)
Thank you so much. This hit really close because back in February I had to put my dog down after he got really unwell all of a sudden. It literally happened within hours. In the end he lost the use of his back legs and it was progressing up his body and the vet did give us an alternate option but it had a very low success rate so we decided to do what was best for him and relieve him of his pain and let him go. I stayed with him and the vet as the vet was injecting him. My mum and sister had to leave the room. He left us at exactly 2am. The journey home was basically me reflecting back on the 7 years I had spent with my dog. He had learnt to notify my mum when I was seizing all by himself. No-one taught him. He was so clever. Scooby I miss you buddy
my dog died a year ago and my therapist told me to just get over it
yiKeS
her name was lilly she was 7 years old and so full of life
she was diagnosed with leukemia and we were told that she wouldn’t have long left and we didn’t want her to suffer so we decided to put her down
i remember it as if it was yesterday
we tried to give her the sleep injection thing and it didn’t work because she was so energetic and full of life and we had to put 3 more in her to calm her down even a little bit
my heart was literally broke the entire process and i remember her tail was wagging the entire time
i remember when i used to get in fights with my parents or friends i used to go to her and she would calm me down almost instantly even just from being there
i miss her so much still
it’s been a year and i still say goodnight to her every night
i miss you so much lilly 😔
fly high angel
Thank you for this. I lost my dog two years ago and it hurt like hell for a really long time. If any of you has a pet, spend more time with them. They bring so much happiness and joy to our lives, while you bring so much more to theirs.
I understand so well. We put Gizmo, our 17 year old rat terrier mix down yesterday. It's been one of the roughest 24 hours I've had in many years. Everywhere I go everything I do, I see and remember him. God gave us a wonderful gift. He brought so much joy into our lives. I miss him so very much.
Thank you so much for making this video. I cried along with you. It’s been almost 2 weeks since I’ve lost my darling girl. She was 11.5 years old and the absolute love of my life. I am beyond brokenhearted and find every day so difficult to face without her. I appreciate your sensitivity and can completely empathize with how you feel. Thank you again.
Thanks for sharing. I lost my fur baby this April only a few days after celebrating his gotcha day. It all happened so fast. My Samson was like Mwaji in that he loved people so much. He never met a person he didn’t love and get excited to see. He was with me for 12 years. I miss him so much.
We had to put our cattle dog down recently. I got him in 2012 at 2 months old. He was about to be 11. But suffered from seizures every few months. Was developing neurological issues so hind legs wouldn’t work right. Enlarged heart as well. He lived a long happy life and was smart and obedient. He was the best. But we look forward to getting another dog when we are ready. Have a baby on the way as well.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and raw emotions regarding pet loss 🤗 My sweet 12 yr old bunny passed a few days ago. He was the last survivor and sole companion that helped me get through the death of my husband and my other bunny that passed at the same time. It really bothers me how many people so easily dismiss my loss(s). The only thing that keeps me from feeling completely alone in my grief is the many spirit dream visitations and signs that I have received from my husband and our pets ❤️
I thank you for this video more than you’ll ever know. I lost my chow/retriever mix around 1am a few days ago on June 1st. A lot of highlights that stood out in this video are the same that I’m going through right now. One of the main ones that caught my attention was the fact “my schedule would revolve around my dog”. No matter what I dealt with that day, good or bad, I always look forward to coming home to “buddy”. Now every time I hear the name “buddy” either in public or working, all I think about is loosing my best friend not even 4 days ago. Another part that stood out in the video was people asking me to get a new dog, & there’s no way I could bring myself to it for a very long time, if I ever do get another dog. I’ve had “buddy” since before I started high school back in 2015. I’m already half way through tech school now and no matter what I dealt with in school, he’d always bring an enlightenment in our home & myself. My concluding statement would be, “you don’t realize how much you appreciate something until it’s gone”. I haven’t gone one second with thinking about him, I can’t even sleep without reminiscing about him. I only think about how he’s in a better place now and try to better myself than what I was before when I was with him. Anyone could use this kind of video to remind them that they’re not along. Couple days ago I watched the first Marley and Me, bad idea but I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Thank you for this heartfelt video... I am grieving the loss of my Beloved baby too. Her name was Bella. She was my World... It is the worst pain ever & I miss her so desperately & Reading & Hearing of other people's stories, are helping me through my Grieving Process. Our Society should not put shame on Grieving for our Fur Babies... They are family members...This is an unbearable pain like no other. Sorry for your loss... 😢😢💔
❤sorry for your loss, we had to say goodbye to our fur baby recently, listening to you has helped. The grief is REAL! 😢
Thank u for this video. My dog Eva died two days ago. I loved her so much. She was so beautiful. She was part of me. When she died a part me died too. I am so lonesome without her. I cry for her. I call out her name. I try to remember the person I was before. I try to think of who I am without her. I try remember who I was when she looked at me. I was connected to her. I knew what love was. I knew what joy was. I knew peace. Now, daily routines are aching, painful reminders of the person I’ll never be again.
I feel this so deeply. I lost my Brody 3 weeks ago and what you described is so similar to the thoughts and feelings I'm going through. I hope you're able to keep going with Eva in your heart. My consolation right now is that the love we shared with our sweet dogs will never die. No one can take that away from us.
Man I never thought I would cry so much in front of a CZcams video... Losing a dog you love is truly devastating, thank you for putting words on this feeling.
My dog died last week. Thankyou for showing me what Im going through is normal. I had a shih tzu x maltese so this was a tear jerker.
My dog, my best friend, just passed away 3 days ago. I'm still grieving. I had him for 11 years and he helped me with sad moments.
Thanks for the video, man.
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. The pain will ease with time but your love and their loss will always be there. You aren’t alone in this struggle.
@@drali thank you. I had him memorialized too
My Beloved dog Forest died in February 2023. I am so grief stricken. Thanks for this video sharing your grief. It helped me to feel less crazy and alone.
Thank you for this video. My childhood pet died almost 2 years ago now. The last picture I have of her is actually a selfie of me, she’s in the background, but she’s not looking at me. It’s like she was hiding the inevitable that she knew was coming. That picture was taken at 7:10 am before my college classes that day. I went to my parents that night, and that’s where her body started to give up. She died the next morning as I was rushing her to the emergency vet, at approximately 4am.
This video almost brought me to tears because it reminded me of her so much. She was my best friend since childhood (she died when I was 19), she knew me better than anyone, and she was the only one that was always there for me. I still cry about her every now and then, more than I cry about the loved ones I’ve lost. It hurts so much more. I’m glad that you’ve made this video, it makes my feelings feel so much more valid.
I had dealt with death my entire childhood, but nothing could have prepared me for losing her. I’m so sorry for your loss. Pets are our family, and our best friends. I hope you, your wife, and your friends can find peace. And again, thank you so much for this video.
I'm very sorry for your loss. I just lost my 14 year old Chihuahua 6 days ago. She had kidney failure and I had to have her put to sleep. I never knew how hard it was to lose a pet until now. Like you said, it's just like losing a close family member. I feel devastated from it.
I lost my little Prince Louie -toy poodle -5 week ago….im crying every day and can’t stop…I miss him so so much.
Thank you so much! Your video helped me tremendously after losing my 8 year old dachshund Buckee, who passed away from renal failure back in September 2018. I felt a total disconnect from life after losing him, and struggled for many months. Luckily I had great family and friends who helped me through the massive grief.
I know the pain . I’m sorry for your loss. Love has a price and that’s grief. She’s in doggy heaven watching over you.
Thank you having the courage to show grief of which I'm too frightened to express with the loss of my pet now.
Thank you for this very beautiful expression of your pain. I find it helpful with my own grief, perhaps because grieving seems so terribly isolating. I had to put my sweet Bichon Frise down 3 weeks ago after a few months of complications from Cushings disease, then diabetes and finally, a turn for the worst which event threw the vets off. (The chief vet thought it was. probably cancer). We were together for 12 wonderful years, and what is even more precious about him (Bambi) is that he kept me going after the death of my husband just two years ago...Bambi was my lifeline, my connection to the world outside, as I have no other family, and few friends, after nursing a sick husband for years. I really expected Bambi to live at leas a few more years, which small dogs usually do, so I feel so cheated, and unfairly dealt with by the universe...two great losses in as many years is very challenging...not that I do not try to seek enlightenment and joy from appreciating what I do have. As you have indicated, there is not much support or understanding of pet loss in our culture. I am essentially alone with it, and my home feels so incredibly empty. I almost felt panicked about getting another dog, just so I would not have to bear the silence and emptiness anymore but right now I am too depleted to deal with it...the loss of a sick pet can bring many other secondary losses, especially financial ones, with oftentimes crushing vet bills.
I lost my snail a few days ago and i'm devastated she was my baby and its hard for people to understand, they say "Ooh is just a snail buy another" but she was so smart and full of personality, she used to make a pile of food so the aquarium wasn't messy she made her own schedule and loved to sleep in an apple. I took a lot of videos but now I can't see them and I've been crying a lot.
Sorry for your loss 💛
I'm sorry for your lose. Im feeling the same way. My heart is so broken 💔 my pitbull was truly my best friends my old friends. We did everything together im greiving a hard. I miss him so so much
Thank you so much for your video. I just lost my dog and this video helps a lot. Thank you
Thank you for giving words to the immeasurable pain and loneliness I feel losing my very best friend in the world, my beloved Ziggy, who was my joy, my comfort, my love and my stinker. I miss him so much it physically hurts.
Thank You for making this video, because right now our family is feeling the pain of loss. We are about to go to the veterinary hospital to have our poor 16 year old little soulmate put to sleep. The pain is overwhelming, I lost my Mother only a month ago and my husband was made redundant two months ago. If life is meant to teach you lessons and make you stronger, at the end of all this I will be able to face anything. Right now all we can do is take one step in front of us. The pain of losing a cherished little dog is equal to the pain of a human. They're there for us through all our moods, all our bad times, they really do have unconditional love, and it's the tiniest of everyday things we will miss. I'm feeling double the pain watching my heartbroken daughter, who has grown up with him, utterly inconsolable. Thank you for expressing this heartfelt emotion in this video, it really does help to connect in this way, and sorry you had the same pain of loss, it's heart wrenching Xx
I love how vulnerable you are in this video, Ali. I cry watching it. I have an old cat and seeing her grows old already hurt me, because I really love her and I want her to be always healthy and well. Thank you so much for making this video and showing us that tears of loss is not weakness and the loss we feel is real. Rest in peace, Mwaji.
I lost my little Shy last night also from heart failure...the pain is enormous..my days evolved around her..because the last few months she was on alot of meds & too weak and had to be carried out to potty.. I could never cry in front of her over it, because she would get concerned about ME..she was the sweetest love I've ever known.
Totally understand. We lost our eight year old golden 10 days ago to cancer. My husband and I held her for another three hours and I felt exactly how she went from warm to cold. I cut some her fur and I need to touch the fur every day to ease the pain in my heart.
Sadly I had to put my little doggie down 2 weeks ago. She was in my family for 16 years and I loved her so. I have been so sad not to have her in my life in the physical form anymore. I will never get over losing her. Thank you for posting this.
I just lost my 14 yr old cat last Wed. I've been thru pet loss 2 other times. It has been so difficult and gut wrenching. I've had a ton of support, which is wonderful. Grief is so individual. In time, it does lessen but the pain is real and I think worse than losing a human, tbh.
Thank you for sharing this with us. I'm so very sorry this happened to you and your extended family. It definitely hurts, and feels like you've lost a person. It's such a pure relationship. My husband and I lost our little "boy" 2 years ago and it was just devastating. Luckily, we have a wonderful animal hospice in our area and they came to our home to perform the euthanasia. They were amazing people who helped us through a horrible time. Eventually, we were able to adopt another little dog that needed us just as much as we needed her. Meanwhile, the grieving process is very hard; very hollow; very empty feeling. No other little soul can take the place of the one you've lost. My heart goes out to you. I understand. Thank you for your openess and honesty on this topic. So important! Best wishes! ❤
Thank you for making this video. My dog died almost two months ago and I am totally heartbroken. I feel like a shell of my former self. Like my entire heart is gone. I cry everyday and cry even harder when I think about my dog being gone forever.
I must have a bit of disenfranchised grief because while I grieve, I grieve in private. And try to be "normal" in the presence of other people.
I had to put my dog down four months ago... I had her ever since I was around 6-7 years old so it hurts so much more because I grew up with her and she's seen so me go through so many milestones in my life. I'm still hurting so much from it.
I'll always love you Pepper. I miss you sweet girl
I’m really sorry for your loss. I wish you and your loved ones peace as you move forward and reflect on your happy memories.
I admire your strength for making this. This comforted me as it's easy to feel alone during these times. My boy of 14 years passed 1 week ago. It is the hardest experience of my entire life. God bless you, sir
Hi. I watched only one video of yours before I saw this one, and I got very emotional watching this because I just lost my 17 year old dog a couple of months ago. I started crying almost as soon as you did. Thank you Soo much for making this video and sharing it with all of us!
Thank you for this video. I lost my best friend my American Bulldog Solomon this past Thursday. I'm heartbroken and miss him dearly. Connecting with those who have gone through this weather it be directly or through CZcams has definitely helped. I know its been a bit of time but I'm sorry for your loss. I hope the time has brought some healing. Thanks again
I lost my dog a little over two weeks ago, and it's amazing how some people really don't get it. I even had a help hotline worker tell me that it's an animal and that's different from a human, they understand it's a family member and you can grieve, but you need to understand that it's not like a human. And then they suggested that I just get another puppy.
I think some people really just think it's the same as telling someone when their computer breaks to just get another computer. They don't understand the bonds that we form with these amazing creatures. They might as well just tell a mother who has just lost her baby to just have another one.
I think it would be entirely appropriate to call these people out when they display insensitivity and ignorance like this. The fact that they can't understand the grief of animal lovers upon losing a pet doesn't mean that the grief is invalid. It just means that those people don't get it and are ignorant.
justmerosie : I don’t think it’s really ignorance but it definitely is a loss of empathy in them. Maybe they just can’t relate to someone else’s grief unless it affects them. People that love animals have a special gentleness about them that these people will probably never understand. So just dismiss them,& maybe we should feel sorry for them, because I’ve heard it written that. “ until one experiences the unconditional love of a dog, there is a part of their soul that has not been awakened “ I believe that 😪
I just want to thank you for making this video. I had it in my "watch later" list for two months but I watched it today, I really regret I didn't do it earlier. This video contains so many important things. First it showed a psychologist is also a human who can cry and break down. Sometimes I think that people have this weird delusion that we psychologists are perfectly fine with our emotions and nothing can get to us which is a lie. We're all humans, we cry. I'm glad you showed how important it is to not bottle up and cry when you need to. I'm glad you showed that losing a pet can hurt just as much as losing a close person. It's not just an animal, a pet. It's also a family member. They feel and understand so much more than some people think. I teared up few times during watching it and everytime I did I went to my beautiful 10 yo pupper whom i almost lost two times. These were one of the most difficult times in my life and i cant even imagine how much it hurts when you actually lose them... Thank you. Just thank you. You're amazing person, empathetic, I love your approach to life and what you tell people. I hope you're doing better now, blessings for you and your family
thank you for resonating my feelings. pets are so much like our family and the loss is irreplaceable
Thank you for this video. 2 days ago my mother lost her beloved cat. Thanks to you we can go through this time with more wisdom. Thank you.
Thank you. My baby boy, Whistler (in my photo), died Friday. We took him to be cremated today. This has been the single most difficult loss of my life.
i have experienced a lot of close family dying. my cat squeaky died yesterday morning unexpectedly at the young age of 9 and the grief i’m experiencing is incomparable. i am so heartbroken i don’t know what to do. he gave me unconditional love for 9 years. rip squeaky
Thank you so much for this! As is said, misery loves company, and to see someone share their grief like you have helps me deal with mine! 2 weeks now since euthanizing my best pal! So, so sad!
Rob Frye : Same here .I would just love someone to tell me when the crying stops. .😪
I just lost my best little furry friend for about 12 years and the pain is unbelievable it’s worse then a break up in my opinion (ZOE🐶❤️ rip I love you )
Thank you for making this video and being so openly vulnerable with your pain. I just lost the beloved cat yesterday that was part of my life for the last ten years. I had pets before which I loved dearly, but something about this connection was so unique and pure, I can't stop crying. Just today my best friend told me "to get over it" and that "it's just a cat". The video is helping to get some sense it the grief and that the emotions are legitimate
Losing a pet is one of the hardest and loneliest challenges in life. My heart goes out to you and your family as you heal. Thank you for sharing so openly.
I can’t thank you enough for this video.
That was PERFECT!!! Thank you SOOO much. I am broken but seeing you broken too has helped.
I'm so happy this was healing for you in some way.
I'm so glad I stumbled across this video. A few months ago on my birthday I lost my first dog. She'd been in my life for 15 years - I was 7 when we got her, I don't remember life without her. Now, 4 months later, I'm losing my cat of 10 years. To lose both of my pets in such a short timeframe (and where I'm not in a position to get another) is breaking my heart. I'm constantly being asked why I'm so sad, they were just a dog/cat. The pain is real, there's an empty space in my life where they were.
Thank you, Doctor Ali. I'm sorry for your loss. Moji seemed like a really sweet soul. I'm losing my dog sometime this week, and the grieving process has been extremely hard. I've mostly felt depressed, sad, confused, disbelief and numb. Frankie, the sweet sweet dog you see on my pfp, has cancer. It's extremely special, the bond you have with your pet. Especially dogs, who just are pure love.
Wow! So touching, so true. Brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for being brave enough to share this, and thank you for bringing awareness to the disenfranchised grief of losing a very special bond.💞
When our family dog passed, with me living out of state now, our family shared the grief together over the phone as a group. It is real and they are real family members. Peace to you and your family.
I'm so touched you've shared your pain with us. Take good care of yourself. If you find make videos helps to distract you away from the pain and that is helpful, do that. Equally, if your grief means making videos hinders your journey through it, then do not worry about us. Do what you need to endure the motions. You know best how to manage it and to not fall in the therapist trap where one knows enough about it so doesn't seek colleagues support and goes through it alone. All is impermanent. Much love ❤️
I am sorry for your great loss and thank you with all my heart for making this video showing the very raw emotions we can feel at the loss of our most precious companions - helped greatly to know there are others who have felt the same as i did when my iwn dogs passed 🙏⚘❤
I agree totally this pain is real. I feel the same pain as if a person died and to be honest this hurts alot more ... pets are not just a human death they are part of you every single day . Thank you your video helped me so much 😔💕
Thank you so much for sharing your story. This helps a lot with my grieving, and I also cried for your loss as well. There’s not enough videos out there that share these same feelings.
I lost my dog, im a psychiatric nurse and since Monday I have been in bits! He was there for me when life was shit, miss you Murphy dog!
Such a great video. Thank you for making it. Going through tremendous loss as well. We're not alone. Stay strong.
I just lost my pet 4 days ago, and I am just feeling lost and depressed... it was a heartwarming video... I felt your pain... and relate totally...
Thanks for sharing man. I just lost my beloved dog. I’m mourning very badly. I’m sorry about your loss as well. This shit sucks.
I just lost my best pal Bandit yesterday he was born on my bed and gave me 13 wonderful years im devastated, it helps to know im not the only one deeply greaving, i cant eat or sleep thanks for the video and god bless and comfort everyone going through this
It is going to be the 1 year anniversary of my dog's death in a couple weeks, and I still think about her every single day. Thankfully now I can think about her with happiness instead of soul crushing grief, but I still cry often over her loss and have days where I just beg the universe to give her back, even though I know it's not possible. Thank you for really validating those feelings for me, pets are so important to us
Thank you for this. I lost my dog, and best friend for 10 years, today, due to cancer. I knew it was coming but I am devastated. I hope you
have found some peace. I hope to find some peace one day.
Thank you my friend. I lost mine a week ago. You seem like someone with a lot of love to give. I hope another pet has won that love since you lost her. With time, i hope and believe i will give mine too. Take good care, Oded (Tel Aviv)
She is beautiful and thank you I was a auntie to my best friend dog Bobby, for the past 12 yrs we were buddies and this past week as I dog sat him and his older brother he suddenly passed away in front of me. I’m devastated by it and had to call my husband because my friend was out of town it would take time to get back, I was so afraid plus there was blood it was the saddest thing I ever experienced. But I’m glad Bobby wasn’t alone he was the best buddy around , my poor dear friend was so sad, I wish that would’ve happened. Thanks for sharing your experience. I’m still very shaken up.
Thank you... thank you so much for this!!! Everything you said in this I truly felt! I’m deffff going thru the disenfranchised grief thing and it sucks!! But I know I’m not alone and I’m not insane and that this is what is and if you loved a animal then your one of the lucky ones!! Again thank you!!!
I feel your pain I just lost my beloved Tuffy this week we had to put him down after 15 years of loyal companionship it's very heartbreaking I still can't get over it I wish you well
I'm sorry for your loss.
Today I lost my beloved best friend, pet dog, after having him for 17 years. It was expected of course, at his age. But the end came so suddenly, I'm in shock. He got a prolonged seizure, and didn't recover from it. I am heartbroken.
It's an awful feeling. I can relate. Lost my boy of 14 years 1 week ago. It's hard to function but we must move forward for them. I dont know who you are or where you're from but you are in my prayers. Be strong.
@@the_k_space thank you.
Thank you! I lost my precious yorkie poo two days ago and I can’t stop crying.