Why Do People Commit Suicide? Director of Suicide Prevention at Mount Sinai

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  • čas přidán 10. 09. 2024
  • Dr. Igor Galynker, MD, PhD, is the Director of the Suicide Research and Prevention Laboratory at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York, where he’s developed and validated scales to determine the suicidal risk of patients. Dr. Galynker discusses the contributing factors to suicidality, prevention strategies, and his proposed suicide-specific diagnosis, Suicide Crisis Syndrome.
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Komentáře • 1,6K

  • @juliemclain5841
    @juliemclain5841 Před 6 měsíci +357

    Hopelessness, abuse, fear, no outlook of living getting better, no want or will to continue fighting

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 4 měsíci

      not try even little by more scientific thinking makes it non-easy to solve that

    • @OGreenWorId
      @OGreenWorId Před 4 měsíci +2

      @@Guys_Love_Each_Other what?

    • @starry2205
      @starry2205 Před 3 měsíci +7

      Why is it so hard for people to comprehend hopelessness?
      Its so frustrating. Like, why? Why NOT? No one does this if they feel like they have a choice

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 3 měsíci +2

      @@OGreenWorId like we don't try to feel those emotions but try to run away from those emotions, we don't try to solve those emotions logical way

    • @CesarNostradamus-wj9uq
      @CesarNostradamus-wj9uq Před 3 měsíci +2

      Being gang stalked and tortured is definitely putting me over with no loyal wife

  • @jacquibrown4271
    @jacquibrown4271 Před 6 měsíci +211

    People don't want to die, they just don't know how to go on living.

    • @joeszymanski3540
      @joeszymanski3540 Před 4 měsíci +9

      Exactly. You just want to stop existing.

    • @-_-_-_-_-...
      @-_-_-_-_-... Před 4 měsíci +2

      In a way, yeah.

    • @colemartin1168
      @colemartin1168 Před 3 měsíci +10

      I have suicidal ideation a lot of the time due to chronic pain with mental and physical illness I just want too not suffer I don’t want too die I’m scared too die equally as scared too live my whole life this way

    • @CesarNostradamus-wj9uq
      @CesarNostradamus-wj9uq Před 3 měsíci +3

      Without a loyal wife what’s the point

    • @21stCenturySpaceOdyssey
      @21stCenturySpaceOdyssey Před 3 měsíci +6

      Not necessarily. There are those who are suffering from chronic extreme pain from a terminal illness; with that condition there is simply no "going on living".

  • @alex-vs4hh
    @alex-vs4hh Před 6 měsíci +265

    Ultimately it comes down to loss of hope. Once you lose hope that better days are ahead everything loses its meaning.

    • @terryyoung857
      @terryyoung857 Před 5 měsíci +11

      That's exactly what it is

    • @joeszymanski3540
      @joeszymanski3540 Před 4 měsíci +7

      You are absolutely right. Or in my case anyway. When my girlfriend passed away hope went with her.

    • @-_-_-_-_-...
      @-_-_-_-_-... Před 4 měsíci

      Bingo

    • @dakweenlyrics409
      @dakweenlyrics409 Před 3 měsíci +4

      @@joeszymanski3540I’m so sorry for your loss, I hope you’re doing well now or atleast trying to

    • @girlwithpearls
      @girlwithpearls Před 3 měsíci +1

      Very true

  • @renzo6490
    @renzo6490 Před 5 měsíci +108

    I have no family.
    No children.
    No partner.
    No one who will inherit anything when I die.
    I have no life’s work that I need to accomplish.
    I have no fear of death.
    I have NO fear of death!
    To be kept alive is, to me, cruel…a form of torture under the guise of care.
    I MUST be allowed to end my life when I want to.
    I am not afraid to die.
    I am afraid to live diminished, incontinent, in pain, immobile, unable to gather my thoughts well enough to express them in words, unable to remember who people are., unable to expel my waste in a toilet..
    I don't want to be exploited by the geriatric BUSINESS.
    I have a RIGHT to stop when I choose !!!

  • @ronalddauro563
    @ronalddauro563 Před 6 měsíci +78

    “When the terrors of life outweigh the terrors of death, a man will put an end to his life.”
    Arthur Schopenhauer

  • @JanneKonglevoll
    @JanneKonglevoll Před 7 měsíci +403

    Being exposed to narcissism and psychopathy breaks you down and causes suicidal thoughts, parental alienation, manipulation and isolation 💔

    • @DelmaRaySmithJr
      @DelmaRaySmithJr Před 6 měsíci +4

      Certainly that is a possibility, not prophecy, interactions are inherently counterintuitive.

    • @michelekisly2535
      @michelekisly2535 Před 6 měsíci

      Yes, rare illness, physical & mental that they use against you--- smearing you in the Community, even your family is seduced by their demonic charm/lies.
      They cannot change and you are wasting your precious energy reasoning with them. They abhor Truth and refuse any invitation to Intamacy to protect themselves from it. Guard your heart ! When an Overt is done with you, a Covert comes along with a new Game. Dangerous!

    • @jenifermullin7168
      @jenifermullin7168 Před 6 měsíci +13

      Yes it does ✋. I relate.
      ❤️‍🔥

    • @katyhawkins1149
      @katyhawkins1149 Před 6 měsíci +25

      And these evil beings get everything on a silver platter

    • @peanut1001x
      @peanut1001x Před 6 měsíci +20

      exactly totally destroyed me

  • @user-it6sh1vk9m
    @user-it6sh1vk9m Před 6 měsíci +187

    When the pain is too much to bear and there's no other way out. 😢

    • @LEIGHandME
      @LEIGHandME Před 6 měsíci +2

      It isn't a way out tho. It might feel like that tho

    • @loriboufford6342
      @loriboufford6342 Před 6 měsíci +4

      And there's NO ONE there to stop you.

    • @user-it6sh1vk9m
      @user-it6sh1vk9m Před 6 měsíci +1

      Everyone can have that moment.

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 4 měsíci +3

      yeah, way too much stress chemicals just becomes way too much to handle at that time

    • @peaceofmindofpeace1650
      @peaceofmindofpeace1650 Před 4 měsíci +1

      When it feels like nobody cares about you, you worked hard all of ypur life but lost it after having some wolves in sheepclothing on your path who were out to use and.abuse and apply mental violence as well.
      I am to scared to die I won't commit suïcide bc I want to win but I do have thoughts and feelings when I feel alone and tired from worrying etc.
      I am resilient, most of us are but I learned we all have our limits.
      I am healthy and no debts but lately I have seriously been scared to lose my home.and beated myself up selling my house where I was r.ped etc. But I can't undo that decision so I tell myself to accept everything.and try my best.
      The energy is less though bc I'm not in my 30s anymore.

  • @jackiesmith2801
    @jackiesmith2801 Před 7 měsíci +315

    I think a lot of people want to go because they do not want to end up living like an animal in a tent on the streets, freezing and starving, and becoming a victim of violence. Life is too expensive and there is no other way out.

    • @iwhippedcreamcode4642
      @iwhippedcreamcode4642 Před 6 měsíci +17

      Pray for What You really need from The Almighty! And Follow through ! He Does Care!

    • @thebower8027
      @thebower8027 Před 6 měsíci +38

      Or from chronic pain. Cannot lay down on a bed because of spinal stenosis. A simple joy of laying down on a bed and getting proper rest and sleep. DENIED! Enough to make you want out.

    • @user-gn6hi3ii4i
      @user-gn6hi3ii4i Před 6 měsíci +37

      I am 64 year old man living in a one bedroom apartment. I live off of SSDi at 909.00 a month and my rent is 650.00 I work part time job and make around $200.00 a week. I feel hopeless and suicidal. I have a right ankle arthritis and loss of hearing in my Left ear. I thinking I'm going to be homeless soon again

    • @DanielPowlett
      @DanielPowlett Před 6 měsíci +21

      ​@user-gn6hi3ii4i please don't give up, keep going...I am 1000's of miles away from you yet care that you live. You choose to work, you are doing good brother. In this minute where I want to find something to say to give you hope, a truth....I know someone who knows you will care, I know the thought to end your life can pass, please stay with it, I hope that you can find someone to talk to who will help you to see that there can be more light ahead for you...

    • @thexpax
      @thexpax Před 6 měsíci

      @@user-gn6hi3ii4i dear sir, if you don't believe in praying to God this is 💚 a great time to try please

  • @Crystalquartz964
    @Crystalquartz964 Před 10 měsíci +259

    My friend died by suicide 2 weeks ago. She was having severe insomnia and was seeing a Counsellor and a Psychiatrist but nothing helped her. R.I.P. Diana ❤

    • @shellymende8174
      @shellymende8174 Před 8 měsíci +32

      My daughter died by suicide, she had a psychiatrist, 2 therapy sessions a week, had been in the hospital,(which was no help at all). Nothing seemed to help her, she had been a meth addict and was sober for over a year, she took a 3 month supply of Welbutin. Who would give an addict 3 month supply?

    • @graemegeorgeharrison2468
      @graemegeorgeharrison2468 Před 7 měsíci +9

      God bless

    • @taghazoutmoon5031
      @taghazoutmoon5031 Před 7 měsíci +24

      Xanax helps with insomnia. It's been a lifesaver for me. Insomnia can make you lose your mind.

    • @aleccullen2696
      @aleccullen2696 Před 7 měsíci

      He had his chance at that and blew it.@@graemegeorgeharrison2468

    • @michelekisly2535
      @michelekisly2535 Před 7 měsíci +12

      I am now an insomniac and it's not helping me stabilize

  • @Trace7173
    @Trace7173 Před 7 měsíci +181

    I've been without health insurance for over 20 years so I'm glad you brought up the insurance question..The lack of an answer except for a suicide hotline tells me there really is no treatment for uninsured and suicidal people like myself

    • @user-yv9fq5ym9w
      @user-yv9fq5ym9w Před 6 měsíci +4

      What about Medicaid? Apply.

    • @MetalForLife1970
      @MetalForLife1970 Před 6 měsíci +23

      Coming from experience there really is no help period for mental health. Not trying to be negative but I've been in and out of mental hospitals since my early 20's (I'm 53 now) and besides a 3 day stay which results from a point of desperation and meds there really is nothing that can be done. I got to the point that I just threw up my hands and said fuck it in gonna live this life and try to ignore my mental issues. It has helped some so just hang in there and keep living life doing the best you can!

    • @debbielefleur-gilley8976
      @debbielefleur-gilley8976 Před 6 měsíci +7

      Me too 😢 it's complete crap.

    • @JoshMaxPower
      @JoshMaxPower Před 6 měsíci +4

      You just have to eat it, like our fathers and grandfathers and great-grandfathers did. It's called "being a grownup."

    • @karenaubin325
      @karenaubin325 Před 5 měsíci +3

      I'm sorry you are feeling like this. There is hope. I did not have health insurance, either. and was suicidal after losing my husband and then one year after his passing losing most of my possessions in the Bastrop wildfire. After a psych hospital inpatient stay, I started going to the community mental health center in my area. Since my income was low enough, I did not pay anything for counseling or for visits to my psychiatrist. The clinic goes by a sliding scale for payment, which can be as low as zero. Have you looked into this option in your area? I want to add that there are also federally qualified health centers that have mental health counseling that serve clients on a sliding scale. Another possible option is to look at getting counseling services through interns who are obtaining their counseling credentials at a university clinic. That is another resource available. I am rooting for you. Sometimes it's just a matter of getting hooked up to the resources in your area. Wishing you the best.

  • @scvman992000
    @scvman992000 Před 6 měsíci +458

    People commit suicide because life is bad and they just want their suffering to end and to rest. The end.

    • @arianbyw3819
      @arianbyw3819 Před 5 měsíci +30

      Absolutely.

    • @vtwin1979
      @vtwin1979 Před 5 měsíci +32

      No treatment or psychiatrist can fix someone’s bills, homelessness etc.

    • @karenaubin325
      @karenaubin325 Před 4 měsíci

      @@vtwin1979 There are resources for the homeless. In Texas, there are specific programs for those who are homeless and are being discharged from a psychiatric hospital. It truly is about getting connected to the right resources for your situation.

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 4 měsíci +9

      yeah, nothing confusing as doctor making our to be its simple as that

    • @synchronicity1470
      @synchronicity1470 Před 4 měsíci +9

      additionally, most are locked inside of their own thoughts isolating
      and most either are not having the benefit of a nice little therapist to talk with or are not emotionally strong enough to call around getting an appt for someone to talk to. plus; good luck with that, as it is impossible to get an immediate emergency doctor's appt. And what suicide candidate is going to drive themselves to the ER in their dreadful last hours or moments?

  • @coltthestarsheriff3544
    @coltthestarsheriff3544 Před 6 měsíci +81

    That lady is one talented interviewer, who asks questions that are not suggestive, who lets her guest speak. Excellent interview.

    • @markash12
      @markash12 Před 6 měsíci +4

      She just knows that topic, she is awesome

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for it’s not too late he have it all for us the least you can do is let him in your life and be strong till heaven! Don’t feel sorry for yourself get eternal life trust in Gods free gift ! Life forever ! You’re a child of God don’t miss this ONE in a lifetime opportunity to FOLLOW GOD THROUGH JESUS HE DIED SO YOU CAN LIVE.
      Read John 3:16 in the Bible

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      @@markash12. Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for it’s not too late he have it all for us the least you can do is let him in your life and be strong till heaven! Don’t feel sorry for yourself get eternal life trust in Gods free gift ! Life forever ! You’re a child of God don’t miss this ONE in a lifetime opportunity to FOLLOW GOD THROUGH JESUS HE DIED SO YOU CAN LIVE.
      Read John 3:16 in the Bible

  • @MrCrowsight
    @MrCrowsight Před 7 měsíci +250

    It’s like being on a loop of inner turmoil you can’t escape from .

    • @ohkay7418
      @ohkay7418 Před 7 měsíci +9

      Every memory in ones inner monologue is negative

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      @@ohkay7418 Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci +1

      Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 4 měsíci +2

      we can try to control that loop, we are not totally powerless probably

  • @johnimburgia4321
    @johnimburgia4321 Před 9 měsíci +156

    No money no treatment. He was stumped when asked where the poor or uninsured can go. The suicide hotlines are a waste. They just want you to go to the ER and from there you will be sent to the psyche ward where you will get NO treatment for your problem. You will likely get sent out with a bogus treatment plan if you have no friends, family, or doctor on the outside. The psyche wards are horrible places with cold inhuman personnel

    • @Elizabeth-ef2mm
      @Elizabeth-ef2mm Před 7 měsíci +36

      💯 on point. I called the hotline on December 17th because I was about to shoot myself, the woman on the line sounded like I annoyed her and her suggestion was to take a cold bath. Effin useless.
      I work 2 jobs, live paycheck to paycheck, have 2 children but don’t have insurance and don’t qualify for Medicaid. Psychologists/psychiatrist fees start at $150 per session. At this point I’m just hanging on by a thread. Mental health is a luxury for wealthy people in this country.

    • @johnimburgia4321
      @johnimburgia4321 Před 7 měsíci +21

      @@Elizabeth-ef2mm You are absolutely right. These so-called doctors won't see anyone without money or private insurance. These hotlines give you numbers to call that just run you around in circles and get you nothing. The system sucks!

    • @Janevelyn
      @Janevelyn Před 7 měsíci +10

      I was highly disenchanted by his response (or lack thereof) as well

    • @aleccullen2696
      @aleccullen2696 Před 7 měsíci

      No money no treatment. A sure sign of a barbarous state. And people scramble to get there. What more proof do we need of Voltaire's and Goethe's view that Earth is the lunatic asylum of the universe? George Bernard Shaw agreed with them. So do I.

    • @lisalasers
      @lisalasers Před 6 měsíci +9

      100%

  • @maryannekelly217
    @maryannekelly217 Před 9 měsíci +558

    A major cause of suicide in people over 50 is financial ruin

    • @seanodwyer4322
      @seanodwyer4322 Před 7 měsíci +12

      mary- A case in Auckland City.- 3 men flaating together- one a kung fu atrtist.- everything okay in thier shared house until a Bill came- They ended upp killing each other and burning the house down from the pressure off who was going too paye upp that bill''.

    • @hfrt29
      @hfrt29 Před 7 měsíci +6

      agreed

    • @joharland5332
      @joharland5332 Před 6 měsíci +8

      Absolutely

    • @NYCBigBull
      @NYCBigBull Před 6 měsíci +2

      Nobody cares about people over 50..the young therapists are clueless.

    • @basicprogrammer6147
      @basicprogrammer6147 Před 6 měsíci +47

      Do you think a Universal Basic Income would help people?

  • @themetalprincess
    @themetalprincess Před 8 měsíci +362

    We do it because this world is horrible, and we dont want to live in it anymore. Some people are magnets for poverty and tragedy. People who have storybook lives could never understand. 😢

    • @bekeneel
      @bekeneel Před 7 měsíci +25

      Yes I've never rly come close to doing something like that but even I understand how this goes to happen, how is that even a question you have to study for 15years lol.. I mean in most cases it's so obvious why ppl make that choice. And the biggest reason imo is simply the lack of care or not getting the treatment or whatever you need in this world (love too for example, maybe most of all).

    • @enatp6448
      @enatp6448 Před 7 měsíci +27

      I think there are very few people that live storybook lives but unfortunately people can present their lives as storybook. I think for most of us our lives have both significantly painful and some Beautiful Moments. If you love nature and animals there's so much to get from that or if you love listening to music or whatever it is. Find what you feel is beautiful in this world and try to put some attention to that. Sending care and compassion to find the beauty in your world.

    • @kirav2536
      @kirav2536 Před 7 měsíci +15

      I came to America with $40 in my pocket. I worked as cleaning lady while going to college and paying for it myself. I am still only one from my family who came here. My life was very difficult and can be look at like horrible for some. As for me I see it as successful. It is all in your mind. You may find a good sides to any situation you are in. Money has nothing to do with happiness. It is plenty to do in this country without money.

    • @skyblue-df2od
      @skyblue-df2od Před 7 měsíci +5

      ​@@enatp6448well said👍

    • @Janevelyn
      @Janevelyn Před 7 měsíci +3

      @@bekeneel the ‘care’ even though lacking- maybe it’s a blessing that it is lacking many times bc it’s so harmful it’s a joke

  • @hilarylaw8415
    @hilarylaw8415 Před 6 měsíci +132

    Sadness with no hope that life will improve.

    • @iwhippedcreamcode4642
      @iwhippedcreamcode4642 Před 6 měsíci

      It Will! There Is A Very Bright Hopeful Future Coming Soon! That's Way Everything Is Getting Expose Now!

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci +2

      Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for it’s not too late he have it all for us the least you can do is let him in your life and be strong till heaven! Don’t feel sorry for yourself get eternal life trust in Gods free gift ! Life forever !

    • @peaceofmindofpeace1650
      @peaceofmindofpeace1650 Před 4 měsíci

      ​@@joelm4847 religious abuse made many ppl suicidal too.

    • @lightofathousand
      @lightofathousand Před 6 dny

      ​@@joelm4847Thank you. I feel so much better now.

  • @SuomyNonaNuo
    @SuomyNonaNuo Před 8 měsíci +181

    Wow, that doctor brought me to tears because he really understands the issue. When I've told my Dr about my suicidal plans, and all the health care professionals that would ask me, they all tell me to call the national suicide line.
    I tell them that that's not going to work because my problem is that I don't feel loved enough, so having to talk to a stranger who doesn't know me, and doesn't care or know anything about me is really not the solution.
    My problem can't be fixed with pills or a few appointments with a psychologist.
    My problem is within myself, and I need to work on the core issue.
    And I had to tell my Dr that if I were seriously suicidal, I wouldn't call him, because if I'm actually planning on going through with it, I don't want to be talked out of it, let alone risk being institutionalised...
    Thank you doctor for getting it.
    I wish I wouldn't have to tell my health care carers about basic thought processes

    • @chrismunoz4936
      @chrismunoz4936 Před 8 měsíci +25

      Word for word how My experience of being suicidal is like. Im happy you’re still with us. I think I know exactly what you’re going through because I have the same thoughts. I hope you’re able to find a way through it.

    • @Beeppoop
      @Beeppoop Před 7 měsíci +19

      I don’t want to live but I’m scared to die. I understand wanting to get help opposed to doing it. My depression tells me do it, but then my anxiety reaches for help

    • @mrnice7570
      @mrnice7570 Před 7 měsíci +8

      Not feeling loved enough - requiring to much validation from external sources. Up your self love. Expect nothing from anyone else. I have found the Buddha answers these questions best of all. Namhu Amida Buttsu

    • @teliza32
      @teliza32 Před 7 měsíci

      God loves you, life is beautiful and I love you.keep living and help others ​@Beeppoop

    • @ControversialChristian
      @ControversialChristian Před 7 měsíci +16

      I understand this completely. I have had major depressive since it was diagnosable, usually around 18, though I remember looking for ways to die as early as 6 years old. Each time a depression would hit, it would be much worse than the last. After a 2 year period of several major losses, I honestly ran out of reasons to live. I have adult kids who I didn't want to harm, and I have my faith, but during that time, i lost sight of both. So I made my plan, gathered my things, and prayed, mostly for forgiveness. A couple hours later, I camecto the realization that I had walked several miles from home. Ironically, that realization came when a car hit me on the side of the road and sped off as I fell down a short hill. The anger is what brought me to the present moment. Long story short, I ended up at an ER, and they evaluated me. They did a psych consult while they had me because I had no idea why I left and because I simply said there was nothing to live for. They said I was fine and were going to send me home. That was maybe the only time I wanted actual help, but I was uneinsured. When they asked if I understood the discharge, I said I did and that if they didn't do anything to help me the next time I came in, they would either resuscitate me or pronounce me either way I didn't care. They decided to help me. I'm pretty sure if they sent me home, I would never have seen this. The reason I talk about it is because we need to put this out in the open so people can discuss it and ask for help before it takes over and kills them. Anything we leave in the dark can grow big enough to swallow us hole. For me, medications don't help. Therapy does some good, but minimally, so I have looks into alternatives like binaural beats and diet. I am also fortunate enough to have both a psychiatrist and therapist who understand why hospitalization is not usually the best answer for someone like me. It is so hard to advocate for your own wellbeing when all you want to do is die, but if you come out of such a crisis alive, you will find more strength than you believe is possible. Also, the best antidepressant for me is meeting people in those dark places, honestly listening to them, looking directly at their pain, and walking beside them on their way out. Most importantly, understanding that if they lose the fight even as you are there for them that the outcome was never yours to determine. There are many reasons why people choose to die, but I have found that people with honest connections to others make the choice to live a lot easier.

  • @Kwood10
    @Kwood10 Před 7 měsíci +86

    I have been very depressed throughout my life & have had success with changing my diet & getting physical exercise & getting out in nature . Avoiding certain people that cause you stress & anxiety also helps . I think it is very hard for people to cope in the day to day life & feeling hope to ever feel normal & happy can feel like an impossibility . Training myself to stop negative thoughts in your head & meditating & doing things like painting & certain art projects has helped me allot.

    • @windwhisprz
      @windwhisprz Před 6 měsíci +6

      What if someone can't force themselves to do any of those things anymore? Where can one find strength when all they have inside is weak and collapsing?

    • @rationalcase
      @rationalcase Před 6 měsíci +7

      ⁠​⁠@@windwhisprz Hi, I’m sad to think that you may be referring to yourself, or someone very close, here.
      I have deep personal/family experience of suicide (both ‘successful’ and attempted).
      For what it’s worth, my view on your question is this: At times of extreme suicide risk, regardless of other considerations, you owe it to yourself (whether you ‘feel’ like it or not) to try to survive.
      We know that some people can’t see things this way when they really need to the most.
      But, just like if there was another person, to whom you felt you owed love, protection and care (now, not in the past) - you would do something (anything) to go the extra mile for them, or at least try to find the will and the resource to do so …whether you happened to ‘feel’ value or reward in the action(s) or not, you’d do whatever you thought might be best for them, wouldn’t you?
      In terms of getting to feel like it (surviving) i.e. allowing yourself to emerge from the crisis, I agree with Kwood10 here, on the measures they found beneficial. Not an exhaustive list, by any means, but (from experience) the principle that such physical stimuli do alter one’s internal state for the better (maybe not dramatically….but significantly enough to make a difference …and cumulatively) is sound.
      One key nutrition tip: Professor Dr Stephen Ilardi stated that “a depressed brain is an inflamed brain” and, as such, likely deficient in Omega3 (so diet may need augmentation by Omega3 supplement). Also, don't neglect gut-biome diversity, as deficiency in this is proven to have detrimental neurological effects and reduce resilience to mental stress.
      One physical exercise tip: Anna Ashby is a skilled and gentle yoga teacher, who’s brilliant double DVD is available for a few $/£ (I have no affiliation with her whatsoever, but my suicide-survivor wife and I think this DVD is worth its weight in gold). We’ve used it regularly for the past 12 years and it works both to prevent physical decline when housebound and to build/maintain physical capacity for when you do get outdoors, not to mention there’s also a little bit of meditation involved.
      When a person feels themselves to be in utter despair, such ideas as these can seem (or ‘feel’) superficial and devoid of value.…but you would do whatever you could come up with, to help that ‘other’ person, wouldn’t you? Well your inner child deserves the same …that you try anything to survive; my wife went on to find significant value (and protection) in some things which, at first, seemed pointless to her.
      Worrying and feeling anxious can feel like a duty …like it’s the conscientious, caring way to be …like we’d be selfish to not do it. This is a false rationale, which evolves from a maladjusted fight or flight response, which doesn’t switch off after a few seconds or minutes (as nature intended), but goes on and on and leads to mental and physical exhaustion …and depletion of neurochemicals that would otherwise keep you resilient to mental stressors. It is not conscientious to burn out your threat-response system, nor is it your duty to constantly check-in on it; learn to enjoy any time it settles down (don’t worry, it’ll kick back in for you any time it’s ‘really’ needed).
      Ruminating over past events interferes with focus on the present and can rob you of pleasure in the here and now. But allowing yourself to engage in and therefore focus on activities in the present (preferably with others), even if you have no enjoyment in doing so, absolutely WILL lead to less rumination and, over time, even more focus on the present and ultimately enjoyment in it (fake it till you make it).
      Also, in my experience, it is necessary to distrust any ‘feelings’ which, if believed and followed, would lead to harm - because ‘feelings’ are not facts.
      I hope this helps in some way, God bless you.

    • @windwhisprz
      @windwhisprz Před 6 měsíci +3

      @@rationalcase thank you for your reply. I am going to check out Anna Ashby because yoga is something that I used to enjoy. Physically I've been declining because im.not moving my body. I will also try the omega 3 you mentioned. Thank you for sharing your suggestions with me. I appreciate you answering my question. Blessings 🙏☘

    • @elizaescalante5277
      @elizaescalante5277 Před 6 měsíci

      I totally agree with you!

    • @tammyg8031
      @tammyg8031 Před 6 měsíci +2

      Being able to stay active mentally and physically is very essential to fighting the battle of depression. I agree with your comment 👍

  • @betsyadams2825
    @betsyadams2825 Před 8 měsíci +118

    My son in 2011 shot himself I was in shock for 7 or so years this is the very best video and doctor I have ever seen I hope he succeeded I getting it in DMS ❤

    • @hannesRSA
      @hannesRSA Před 7 měsíci +20

      Sorry to hear, I had a similar loss recently.

    • @kurtgandenberger6139
      @kurtgandenberger6139 Před 7 měsíci +15

      i am crying for your loss. i know you will meet again in the next life. love to you.

    • @ZFern9390
      @ZFern9390 Před 6 měsíci +9

    • @stevewise1656
      @stevewise1656 Před 6 měsíci +10

      I'm so sorry for your loss. My cousin is dealing with the same loss of his son.

    • @trulyyoursish
      @trulyyoursish Před 6 měsíci +5

      So sorry!

  • @Anotherhumanexisting
    @Anotherhumanexisting Před 6 měsíci +31

    Chronic physical illness and pain, a childhood bereft of love and community… everyday is pain.

    • @janetklumper6048
      @janetklumper6048 Před 5 měsíci +3

      This is me, i am still hoping it gets better, i give it to the end of the year.

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for it’s not too late he have it all for us the least you can do is let him in your life and be strong till heaven! Don’t feel sorry for yourself get eternal life trust in Gods free gift ! Life forever !

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      @@janetklumper6048. Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for it’s not too late he have it all for us the least you can do is let him in your life and be strong till heaven! Don’t feel sorry for yourself get eternal life trust in Gods free gift ! Life forever ! You’re a child of God don’t miss this ONE in a lifetime opportunity to FOLLOW GOD THROUGH JESUS HE DIED SO YOU CAN LIVE.
      Read John 3:16 in the Bible

    • @erikbjornson6496
      @erikbjornson6496 Před 2 měsíci

      Absolutely yes I can relate honestly

  • @DAClub-uf3br
    @DAClub-uf3br Před 5 měsíci +13

    People commit suicide when life is full of pain, there is nothing more to do and there is no hope of change.

  • @tracyengle7829
    @tracyengle7829 Před 26 dny +6

    Severe chronic pain should be put on the list as well. Thank you and God Bless

  • @renaelynn6376
    @renaelynn6376 Před 9 měsíci +192

    Family says talk to professionals. Professionals say talk to family My family is a complete negative support system. And is the cause of my suicidal thoughts.

    • @dmski2323
      @dmski2323 Před 7 měsíci +9

      It’s all a loophole. The truth is you can either let those professionals assign you “pills” or go gym. Get a good body, confidence, meet people, money and improve your life that way. We can’t always do the same shit or else nothing will change and we will feel worthless and under appreciated

    • @graemegeorgeharrison2468
      @graemegeorgeharrison2468 Před 7 měsíci +23

      I’ve had great fitness and body and money and it still didn’t help my mental well being, some pain can’t be beaten

    • @KumariKumari-fw7nc
      @KumariKumari-fw7nc Před 7 měsíci +22

      Get away from the family...

    • @seanodwyer4322
      @seanodwyer4322 Před 7 měsíci

      been born intoo a insane mad irish family is suicide.

    • @daniEllaSforza
      @daniEllaSforza Před 7 měsíci +2

      Exactly

  • @hfrt29
    @hfrt29 Před 7 měsíci +90

    i feel like a broken heart comes just above financial.broken heart,by betrayal is by far THE WORST PAIN EVER

    • @katyhawkins1149
      @katyhawkins1149 Před 6 měsíci

      Try being made to feel like you aren't a woman by more than one man because they have an evil attachment but you're made to believe that's the norm like you're hypnotised and you're ugly if you're not skin and bone and feel like God can't even save you then you go stand next to the cut open fence next to the train tracks like I'm thinking of doing now

    • @peanut1001x
      @peanut1001x Před 6 měsíci +10

      no home's worse than anything

    • @paulharrisonadventuregearm5457
      @paulharrisonadventuregearm5457 Před 6 měsíci +7

      Health is number one. All other things give you a chance to start again.. really bad health doesn't necessarily

    • @randommess6667
      @randommess6667 Před 6 měsíci +5

      @@paulharrisonadventuregearm5457 Thats true if you dont have health you dont have anything

    • @angelabluebird609
      @angelabluebird609 Před 6 měsíci +9

      Yes, betrayal is horribly painful, still, I think the death of a child is the worst pain, I believe.

  • @Bloated_Tony_Danza
    @Bloated_Tony_Danza Před 7 měsíci +33

    Never has someone reflected my thoughts and feelings back at me so completely and so accurately. This is exactly it, this is exactly how i feel.

  • @gregprince5283
    @gregprince5283 Před 6 měsíci +37

    You can sum it up in one sentence. They lose hope.

  • @antoniobabb1938
    @antoniobabb1938 Před 9 měsíci +33

    Many things , financial limitations, societal expectations, terrible supposed family dynamics. I can say a lot because I’m still going through it.

  • @davidkeller6282
    @davidkeller6282 Před 9 měsíci +97

    I love this dr.
    You rarely see this degree of empathy in medicine.

    • @YvonneLyons
      @YvonneLyons Před 8 měsíci +4

      My own experience has been ignorance in medicine.

    • @jplum7708
      @jplum7708 Před 8 měsíci +12

      Most drs are very type A personalities. Type A people have very little empathy and think your problems are because you aren't trying hard enough. Many think their success is solely because of their hard work and not because of advantages they may have had or just being in the right place at the right time. I'm not saying someone can't work their way up, but it is amazing that someone who is in medicine can lack self awareness and empathy. I write this as a suicidal type A person. My inner dialog is ridiculous.

    • @YvonneLyons
      @YvonneLyons Před 7 měsíci +6

      @@jplum7708 I find the majority of mental health workers, not just Drs, to have extremely limited empathy or understanding and as you say, think you aren't trying hard enough is an actual symptom of the illness and in my experience judge and punish you for it. Perhaps the mhws should just realise that they are unable to understand and have enough to help and stop taking a wage for their incompetence.

    • @YvonneLyons
      @YvonneLyons Před 7 měsíci +5

      Sorry the grammer isn't great above but I hope the gist is understandable

    • @mrnice7570
      @mrnice7570 Před 7 měsíci +2

      The majority of MH professionals are hugely overworked, overwhelmed and underpaid ( here in UK at least) this leads to jadedness and a drop in empathy and care

  • @mares3841
    @mares3841 Před 6 měsíci +41

    I've started applying Maslow's hierarchy of needs, such as working on housekeeping before expecting myself to drive to a yoga class. Self-care includes self-allowance to do what works.

    • @joelm4847
      @joelm4847 Před 4 měsíci

      Jesus is Lord give your life to God he’s worth living for it’s not too late he have it all for us the least you can do is let him in your life and be strong till heaven! Don’t feel sorry for yourself get eternal life trust in Gods free gift ! Life forever ! You’re a child of God don’t miss this ONE in a lifetime opportunity to FOLLOW GOD THROUGH JESUS HE DIED SO YOU CAN LIVE. GOD HAS A PLAN FOR YOUR LIFE seriously.
      Read John 3:16 in the Bible
      Your decision to accept Jesus is EVERYTHING and your LIFE depends on it not just on this earth.

  • @bibilee4247
    @bibilee4247 Před 3 měsíci +9

    I wish people talked more about how having autism can be a suicide risk. We experience a lot of trauma, stress and anxiety due to our condition and feel emotions so much more deeply. It’s also harder for us to keep jobs and function in society. I’ve been suicidal my whole life and was misdiagnosed with BPD and bipolar, I didn’t find out that I was autistic until I was 27. Hopefully there will be more research done on this. It could save lives.

    • @wingnut71
      @wingnut71 Před 2 měsíci

      My daughter is autistic and struggles to make friends. I've suffered depression for 38 years (since 14). It's all caused by STRESS. I always had a problem dealing with stress and tried to avoid it, but things like bullying are hard to avoid.
      If stress is too intense or goes on too long it causes changes in the brain that lead to depression. I was very stressed and unhappy for 4 years but I was able to function socially in that time. In the fourth year I started to feel a "different" sadness that was debilitating and made me unable to get out of bed.
      The medical community would do better to find a way to block the stress hormones to prevent depression from happening in the first place. After all prevention is better than cure. Surely they have the technology now to create a nonaddictive anti-stress drug that people could take when they are struggling?

  • @chelseahealingtoheal
    @chelseahealingtoheal Před 6 měsíci +42

    In my experience, leaving the hospital after being suicidal only added to the hopelessness I was feeling. I felt like I was a number for profit, then thrown out back to the same problems with not one real resource. This was so informative, thank you Doctor! 🙏🏻 Great interview! ❤

    • @petsmart1000
      @petsmart1000 Před 6 měsíci +1

      I recently was in the hospital and ya, I feel worse than when I went in. even after telling them how beyond depressed I was and am, and how I was severely suicidal, yet no one was listening, or noticed, so I was let out after 3 weeks, on no medication, and feeling unbelievably worse, which I still can't understand is possible. but I'm at the point where I literally have no one, no friends, no family, and not even the small handful of people that I was able to talk to, that I trusted, and that knew me, were no longer at the hospital, so I didn't even have anyone in there. I have absolutely no one anywhere, and nothing matters to me anymore. I'm done with everything and everyone.

    • @justmadeit2
      @justmadeit2 Před 3 měsíci

      @@petsmart1000How are you doing now?

  • @dmski2323
    @dmski2323 Před 10 měsíci +58

    For me it’s financial! I’m a pretty jovial person in all, but because of debts, finances and student loans it’s draining me and making me depressed to go in the real world. Suicide just seems as an escape! And that escape brings me hope to an end of financial burden. We only getting older, time is only going forward with things being more expensive each day wtf. Realistically I can’t see myself owning a home. Let alone enjoy life.. I’m ready to die but i will pray for y’all’s happiness before I leave ❤

    • @ellalopez3358
      @ellalopez3358 Před 9 měsíci +7

      I resonate with u.

    • @MrMay442
      @MrMay442 Před 9 měsíci +13

      I feel the exact same way. I want to end it all but I'm afraid to do it. I know one day I will end it all.

    • @cristianm7097
      @cristianm7097 Před 7 měsíci +11

      Same here. Too poor to continue living.

    • @taghazoutmoon5031
      @taghazoutmoon5031 Před 7 měsíci +4

      There are brand new construction homes near Houston Texas and other areas for only 200k. Just move to a lower cost state to buy a house.

    • @OurTube_TheOriginal
      @OurTube_TheOriginal Před 6 měsíci +9

      Rented my whole life…”Owning” a home is often just an external general goal…better to find a passion, or just something you feel in flow doing…also try volunteering perhaps. I know times are tough financially and there a places where people are poor but have good realtionships, music, humor and make it through.

  • @steceymorgan814
    @steceymorgan814 Před 6 měsíci +216

    Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

    • @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU
      @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU Před 6 měsíci +5

      Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!

    • @Jennifer-bw7ku
      @Jennifer-bw7ku Před 6 měsíci +8

      Yes, dr.sporesss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.

    • @elizabethwilliams6651
      @elizabethwilliams6651 Před 6 měsíci +5

      I wish they were readily available in my place.
      Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac.
      He's constantly talking about killing someone.
      He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.

    • @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU
      @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU Před 6 měsíci

      Is he on instagram?

    • @Jennifer-bw7ku
      @Jennifer-bw7ku Před 6 měsíci +1

      Yes he is. dr.sporesss

  • @someone2021
    @someone2021 Před 6 měsíci +56

    If you have to ask the question, then you have lived a charmed, fortunate life. It is no mystery, life sucks for many people

    • @TenaciousSLG
      @TenaciousSLG Před 3 měsíci +1

      Best comment. Sadly, very true.

    • @someone2021
      @someone2021 Před 3 měsíci +3

      @@TenaciousSLG I have seen several people who have attempted and now claim to have received treatment and are "better" These people have been white, attractive men. They have simply been reminded of that fact and now feel better about themselves. For those of us not so fortunate, we continue to wallow in self pity whilst being subjected to the cruel stares, the laughter and the whispers.

    • @darylfoster7944
      @darylfoster7944 Před 10 dny

      Mostly of their own doing. Bad choices result in bad consequences.

  • @user-bq6ek7lz7h
    @user-bq6ek7lz7h Před 7 měsíci +47

    If your life sucks and has sucked for years and you see no possibility of ever having it change in any significant way. Once you know everything about who you are how can a stranger listen to you for a couple hours and change the things you already know about yourself. It is everyone's God given agency to choose when and how we leave this world.

    • @Olehenry
      @Olehenry Před 6 měsíci

      I think of suicide as an interesting contradictory conundrum. An agent with desire to kill (oneself, or another) by definition wants *to act* and make a positive difference. In your account, @user-bq6ek7lz7h the desire for change is strong, violent even; however, you cannot now, and will never be able to predict the future. (Mid-script: I agree that you & I would not benefit from a stranger listening.) Therefore, I would seek other options that incorporate violence and see how that goes. Think about FightClub. Get your energy & pain out, and start doing some wildly Tyler Durden-esque activities!

    • @chickedee1085
      @chickedee1085 Před 6 měsíci +4

      True, they make out suicide is a mental illness, um no, if someone’s life is in Shite Street for years on end, then yea-h, the normal response is to want to escape. Daaa

  • @wanderingIvy67
    @wanderingIvy67 Před 6 měsíci +48

    I think it's an awful thing to try to prevent suicide. There is too much suffering and we should just let people go when they want to. It is selfish to want to keep someone here and let them continue to suffer for our own selfish desires.

    • @ricardogarcia427
      @ricardogarcia427 Před 4 měsíci +6

      Some people who have tried or have thought to end their lives and received treatment go on to have normal lives. Don't You think they deserved that second chance?

    • @ChakkyCharizard
      @ChakkyCharizard Před 3 měsíci +3

      i would agree with this if most suicides weren't based purely on impulse and not actually what the person wants

    • @thebaysix
      @thebaysix Před 3 měsíci +5

      A healthy society should make room for both suicide prevention and sanctioned suicide. Sometimes people have suicidal episodes that they can move beyond and lead happy fulfilled lives afterward, but also sometimes people have prolonged/life-long depression or terminal illness and such people must be able to choose what is best for them. It can be tricky because it is sometimes unclear which bucket a suicidal person falls into. Ultimately though the decision should be left up to the individual. We should give people many opportunities to help pull them out of suicidal ideation if they wish to recover, but forcing an always unhappy person to choose life is immoral. I think the dominant culture falls a bit too heavily on the suicide-prevention-only side of this, and the rights of the individual are prone to being ignored. However, giving up on suicide prevention all together is not the right thing either. If you're reading this, I want you to be happy and, to the extent possible, I want your suffering to be limited. Best to you ❤

  • @ControversialChristian
    @ControversialChristian Před 7 měsíci +32

    When I left hospital after a suicidal episode I had a 101-degree fever and was told to report I t to the discharging doctor. His reply was that this was not a homeless shelter. I left angry, and if not, for family around me may not have survived the week.

    • @aleccullen2696
      @aleccullen2696 Před 7 měsíci +15

      That doctor should have been discharged. Unfortunately, hospital work acts as a magnet to assholes as well as good people.

    • @seanodwyer4322
      @seanodwyer4322 Před 7 měsíci

      @@aleccullen2696 ahh had same troubles with Doctors at Auckland City hospital- n.z. - they kept me Homeless for 30 years. - They now have me in new city mission which since it opened for the extreme insane homeless 2023 has had 77 fire allarms at mostly night time when hard too walk down stairs as elevators shut off pronto when allrms go off.- 9 floors high is the modern tech building.

    • @OurTube_TheOriginal
      @OurTube_TheOriginal Před 6 měsíci +8

      Thank you for acknowledging family as so many have none or worse. I am so sorry that happened to you.

    • @heide-raquelfuss5580
      @heide-raquelfuss5580 Před 6 měsíci +2

      Horrible experience.
      What a 'care- less' answer of that doctor.
      An @sshole of a doctor.

    • @ControversialChristian
      @ControversialChristian Před 6 měsíci +5

      @OurTube_TheOriginal I tell my story not to cause pity but to hopefully help others. In all honesty, I believe helping others recover we heal our own lives. I did report that doctor as did other clients. That doctor no longer works at that facility. The importance of family and friends is so important to mental health. Fur family has also made so much of a difference in surviving and thriving.

  • @JennyZetterstrom
    @JennyZetterstrom Před rokem +118

    As someone who had attempted twice before and who does still think about it from time to time, I loved this episode. Like it was mentioned, there's so much stigma around talking about suicide and especially when one has attempted. ❤

    • @CamronWilliams-ii4tl
      @CamronWilliams-ii4tl Před rokem +20

      The only reason I’m alive is because of my 6 year old daughter

    • @sharonendler1467
      @sharonendler1467 Před 11 měsíci +7

      Please stay alive and keep reaching out to people.

    • @Karla-yi5ld
      @Karla-yi5ld Před 10 měsíci +5

      We’re all here for each other. Keep reaching out. ❤

    • @steinhvik3057
      @steinhvik3057 Před 10 měsíci +1

      I am always confused when I read about suicidal women. Youre a woman, you are important, you can create life, people want you to exist, you are welcome anywhere.

    • @seaglasscolor
      @seaglasscolor Před 8 měsíci +2

      Please stay with us; we need you! ❤️

  • @MrBungle900
    @MrBungle900 Před 9 měsíci +44

    I’ve had four attempts on my life. And I have no family to support me. How would this doctor treat me, I wonder. I am wholly responsible for all of my suffering and recovery. And yet I am still just waiting for death to relieve me.

    • @alyssacoyle4845
      @alyssacoyle4845 Před 7 měsíci +10

      The world is better with you here I promise.

    • @MrBungle900
      @MrBungle900 Před 7 měsíci +12

      @@alyssacoyle4845 This made me cry. Thank you for sharing that with me. I am not so sure I believe it but I appreciate your kindness.

    • @juliebryant3968
      @juliebryant3968 Před 7 měsíci +7

      ​@@alyssacoyle4845I know you are trying to be kind ...but people that feel very depressed and suicidal don't believe this patronising nonsense

    • @nancyhanscom1374
      @nancyhanscom1374 Před 6 měsíci +2

      It will come. Life is short when you look back. I'm 75 and when my husband got a motorcycle we were 65 and I loved it. I asked him " please go SLOW down this road. He didn't 45 miles an hour is not slow in my eyes. He hit a stray dog and he wasn't injured but I fell off going into a comma for a month, learning to eat, drink, swallow walk. 10 years ago. I suffer everyday of my life. TBI pain, blame, so much!! My stomach ruptured 6 months later!! I'd be gone if I wasn't a coward. Afraid it won't work. Pills I do believe but maybe pills and rope but don't want them to know I did it.

    • @trinleywangmo
      @trinleywangmo Před 6 měsíci +2

      @@juliebryant3968 You are very right. And the reason is, that it's a platitude. Nothing about such a statement actually makes the person hearing it feel better about themselves or their lives.
      It's like when you praise a child for "being good"! That actually causes anxiety over time, because the child doesn't actually KNOW or learn how it's behavior is "good" or how that child can improve, even. Saying the child sings in key, always plays fairly, kindly helps her little brother with his school work unasked, etc., those are very specific things to say. That will help her reflect and learn to differentiate better, and grow up to be emotionally and mentally sound/even-keeled, because she can know what her part/role is in every interaction. If she grows up to not know how she contributes, or what it is that people like or dislike about her behaviors, she's always going to remain ignorant of the control she actually has over her own life...
      People, like children, need you to say WHY they make the world better... if you don't know that person, or try to get to know them... how can you?
      All I know about this person, is that they are suffering, possibly to the same degree that I'm suffering, but it's not a competition! At least, I know this person CARES about suffering, or @MrBungle900 wouldn't have watched the video (idk if they did or not) or take the time to write a comment (possibly reading many of the comments like I have, too).
      It shows that @MrBungle900 is compassionate. And that's a good reason to say they "make the world a better place," because there are far too few compassionate people as far as I'm concerned. But, I'm just speculating. Basing it off my own _dramedy;_ my own "cave allegory".
      Man, I hate sounding like a know it all, but I've survived some real hard $h!t in my lifetime. I ain't holding back any more... and learning how to give and receive feedback, helped me learn how to find something nice (and specific to the person) to say about anyone. I'm really good at throwing insults at people, too, though. So, forgive me if I've insulted anyone here!

  • @h34p
    @h34p Před 7 měsíci +34

    Thank you very much for this video.
    My lifelong best friend ended his life yesterday and i am so devastated, but also feeling completely numb.
    This video explained a lot, even if i will never truly understand why, thank you.

  • @renaelynn6376
    @renaelynn6376 Před 9 měsíci +31

    THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE HEARD A PROFESSIONAL SAY THE FAMILY IS THE CAUSE OF THE SUICIDE. MY FAMILY HAVE BEEN THE CAUSE.

    • @VaughanMcCue
      @VaughanMcCue Před 7 měsíci +2

      They certainly have most likely played a part, and your thinking about it is going to be a significant factor.
      Ponder this over the next four days.
      Instead of focusing on what you are thinking about, acknowledge, without evaluating it, that you are thinking.
      For example. "Here I am thinking."
      That is it.
      It does not mean you necessarily stop the thought because the content could be useful.
      Will I have a coffee now, or will I wait until after I shower?
      Decide, then act.
      If you're thinking about the coffee, and it requires a cascade of possibilities, such as whether I have a cookie, too, whether I should hang the laundry on the line now or later, and whether it is likely to rain soon, blah blah, STOP.
      If the thought is not serving you well, use that moment to recognise that you are thinking. "Here I am thinking."
      You are in charge of your thoughts and to test this now. Imagine a well-balanced car driving along the road, but the front left wheel is missing. Other than that, it has no other issues. I wish the best for you and hope I have contributed something you can use.

  • @mores5780
    @mores5780 Před 2 měsíci +16

    Living is more terrifying than dying. we can't figure out a way to live without fear and pain.

  • @jes2276
    @jes2276 Před 7 měsíci +29

    I like that he brings up that you can not trust a person who wants to leave this life. My friend lied to me too. She said she was staying for her brother, animals, and kids .We were making future plans, and then she was gone.
    I helped stop her before, but this time, she never said anything. I knew her for 30 years since elementary school.

    • @OurTube_TheOriginal
      @OurTube_TheOriginal Před 6 měsíci +12

      Lied? Perhaps it was true until one more thing pushed her over. That you would say she “Lied” speaks to anger turned towards the one who gave up their life, the victim. Maybe there was more mistreatment of her in her life by friends and family than we will ever know

    • @jes2276
      @jes2276 Před 6 měsíci +2

      @OurTube_TheOriginal His patient in the video said he was fine when it wasn't. If you make up your mind to finally leave this life, wouldn't you lie to prevent people from stopping you,.
      In the past, she made half-hearted attempts and would tell people via Facebook or phone calls. We could usually catch her before she did anything. The last time was different. She made up her mind and told no one.
      There is anger because of the guilt. The if I paid more attention guilt. You're right. People did not treat her well. Her boyfriends did her no favors. I did my best to influence her away from abusive people, but all I could do was give my observations and advice and hope she at least thought about them.

    • @lisalasers
      @lisalasers Před 6 měsíci +4

      i’m not kying when i say i stay for my kids but that may not be enough in the end when i’m struggling and they have adult lives. why should i suffer painfully every day so my friends won’t be hurt but then move on?

    • @jes2276
      @jes2276 Před 6 měsíci +1

      @lisalasers It's good to have reasons like kids to stay. I don't know if you have a similar experience as mine, but the thoughts and darkness overwhelm and are very intense for a short time. It overrides the reasoning for staying. I just try to get through it. Those short times are the most dangerous.
      I think that is what happened to my friend. She had overwhelming feelings and finally decided to do it.
      No one ever truly moves on after. I have to work and live life, but she is always in my thoughts. I still feel guilty. Her brother feels guilty, too, and we still talk about her to this day. She was a big part of our lives. We still talk about the good times we had with her.
      I hope you keep trying to get better. I'm not a professional, so the above comment is just based on personal experience. Don't give up.

    • @joyjones2376
      @joyjones2376 Před 6 měsíci +2

      The shock and guilt stay for a long time , a decade or more , but eventually it is livable with . You make peace with the trauma and the happy memories do return . A scar definately but not raw ...

  • @antoniarolls
    @antoniarolls Před 8 dny +1

    I lost 2 sons to suicide in the last 18 months. It's painful to understand in retrospect how they chose to die, but so helpful and important. The most helpful thing is to hear our love and presence probably kept our loved ones alive for longer than if we weren't there. Thank you.

  • @user-kb5zm9jb8k
    @user-kb5zm9jb8k Před 7 měsíci +62

    One of my college professors said, during a class discussion, that she wasn't interested in studying why people commit suicide. She said she understands why some people commit suicide. She was interested in why some chose not to do it. I found her thoughts profound. That discussion changed my own questions and the focus of my own research, eventual theories, and focus of care.

    • @cristianm7097
      @cristianm7097 Před 7 měsíci +7

      Survivorship bias. If we understand why people keep on trucking, we can prevent suicide.

    • @OurTube_TheOriginal
      @OurTube_TheOriginal Před 6 měsíci +6

      LOL…PROFOUND? Ah, yeah cause that is easier to study. What a sad lazy species sometimes…when it comes to killing others we are so ready relatively and saving people who bash themselves and other driving drunk or whatever and yet a depressed person gets nothing…50 min a week “Therapy” and meds or lock up and if one is poor that is for 72 hours sitting around doing nothing.

    • @JEBBY123IFY
      @JEBBY123IFY Před 6 měsíci +7

      I'll do it to prevent going into a nursing home! If I can because as a nurse I've seen too many bodies with no quality just rot away. It's so sad.

    • @chilloften
      @chilloften Před 6 měsíci +1

      @@JEBBY123IFYYes, miserable, on all of these meds, incontinent, all alone, dirty glasses. On & on they live. I started to feel that people are like roaches, and no matter what, they live on & on.

  • @brianna094
    @brianna094 Před 10 měsíci +36

    I think some people live with an extreme amount of guilt and even thinking certain negative thoughts can spiral them into a never ending guilt trip. I can imagine in that state of mind, one feels there is no escape. OCD is a mental illness that can be very debilitating in this way. Some people may think their brain will never be corrected, so the only way out is to "re-start". It's extremely painful to not be able to escape one's mind. Circumstantial depression is one thing, but to be fighting one's mind every day with clinical depression is a death sentence on it's own. It's as if one is already dead

    • @justmadeit2
      @justmadeit2 Před 8 měsíci +8

      Well said, that’s exactly it. Feeling extreme guilt and worry combined with feeling extreme despair and depression with a mind that is fixating on something and you can’t get out of it, plus not eating properly and feeling dread upon early morning waking is unbelievably painful

    • @graemegeorgeharrison2468
      @graemegeorgeharrison2468 Před 7 měsíci

      Yes so true

    • @GrenadaInternational
      @GrenadaInternational Před 6 měsíci +1

      ​@@justmadeit2 Forgive and focus on the positive word of God for your mental healing.

  • @bw4025
    @bw4025 Před 6 měsíci +6

    I was a teacher in the Peace Corps in 2000-01 to 8th graders. One young girl in one of my classes committed suicide by drinking poison. The class she was part of was one of my worst behavior classes- just rude and mean as a whole. She was sweet, sensitive and caring. So a universal; sensitive, out of place, affected by the collective, having no outlet to express and when attempted mocked or ridiculed [ word ] a suicidal person is far from narcissistic. The tribe will say so thogh.

  • @autumngrace8541
    @autumngrace8541 Před 6 měsíci +25

    Notice of symptoms:
    -Feeling of entrapment
    -Frantic helplessness
    -Desire for escape from unbearable situation, all routes seem blocked and /or unescapable
    -State of Emotional Pain
    -Loss of control over your thoughts
    -Insomnia
    -Withdrawl
    -Hypervigilant
    - Strange sensations in body

    • @MN-ri8lg
      @MN-ri8lg Před měsícem +1

      My son had every one of these symptoms..now he's gone.😢

    • @autumngrace8541
      @autumngrace8541 Před měsícem

      @@MN-ri8lg much love your way.

  • @janiemiller825
    @janiemiller825 Před 6 měsíci +19

    It’s the pain verses pleasure theory ..
    More pain than positivity or pleasure in life

  • @toddsmith4327
    @toddsmith4327 Před 7 měsíci +27

    Ty Ty Ty 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 You are the first doctor and/or professional who has actually confirmed what I believed and attempted to advocate for my son many many times to clinicians and providers...that "he will lie to you!" My son had Schizoaffective Disorder, had 8 attempts before completing suicide on the 9th. You wouldn't believe the number of professionals that dismissed my input as his mother, full time caregiver and the person who held a medical POA for him. I was actually told once by a disability advocate and social worker that "He" was her client not me, when I told her that he had been in and out of psychosis and may not tell her the truth (or didn't actually know what was the truth) We have been to ER's when the doc would admit my son only to have the psych dept refuse to accept him because he responded " No" when asked if he wanted to kill himself right then. This being at the same hospital where he had been treated and released a few months earlier due to his first and nearly fatal suicide attempt. It seems as though I became the "bad guy" in every interaction because I emphasized and reemphasized that my son would most surely not tell the truth. He had been in 9 or 10 facilities at this point and clearly he did not want to be institutionalized again. DUH?!! It seems like such common sense to me to believe and understand, yet the medical personnel seemed to dismiss anything I told them as an annoyance or unimportant. We never were able to get my son the level of care he required to get well because his caseworker along with the nurses and social workers at the hospital would not give him a referral anywhere since he was not actively suicidal (in their opinion) Yet there were medical records and documented proof I had compiled that said otherwise.To say that the system let my son down, let our family down, is a gross understatement. During the two years he was living in this horrible state, I became consumed with trying everything I could to keep him alive. I would spend hours researching at night, trying to find a place or organization that could get us the help he needed. I hardly slept, I barely ate, and I became discouraged and lost my usual optimism and positivity. On April 22, 2021 my son left his life of pain and suffering to go back to Source, the Divine Creator. I have experienced so much guilt and regret that words cannot even describe. Logically I know I did everything I could to get him help. However the fact that the medical community had denied and ignored the facts I kept giving them, I couldn't help but feel like I had done something wrong, or just not enough. They made me feel like a paranoid overprotective mother who didn't know what she was talking about and needed to be shut up so they could do their job. (I am a certified substance abuse counselor and a student of psychology so I'm not a complete idiot) The cost to our family for their arrogance and set in stone methodologies are too much for any human being to bear, let alone a mother who has to bury a child. Please please please continue this amazing work you are doing doctor. To say our healthcare system needs someone like you to shake things up and change the status quo, is saying it mildly. Good luck and God bless you!

    • @David-js5yk
      @David-js5yk Před 7 měsíci +2

      Very sorry to hear this, but it happens and we need effective sensible management that works . Surely if we look well enough we will find some help. In the UK we are just launching a major trial in this regard and hope we will save lives , Time will tell!

    • @toddsmith4327
      @toddsmith4327 Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@David-js5yk Ty sir, I wish you the very best of luck with this new type of patient care model trial. These precious people who are in so much pain and suffering deserve it. I would love to hear some kind of update in the future about this from you. Best wishes and God bless!

    • @karenmcardle142
      @karenmcardle142 Před 7 měsíci +3

      You are a great mum . Sending prayers of love ❤

    • @toddsmith4327
      @toddsmith4327 Před 7 měsíci +2

      @@karenmcardle142 Ty so much, really. I struggle with believing that at times (which is pretty normal for suicide mom survivors) so hearing that really helps me with the guilt and regret I experience. So I appreciate that. As survivors we need as much positive energy and prayers we can get. This is an almost impossible road to travel as a mother. Take care my friend ❣️✌🏻

    • @velviteenrabbitt
      @velviteenrabbitt Před 6 měsíci +2

      My mum heart hurts for what you and your son went through and what you are still experiencing. I would like to give you the biggest hug. Thank goodness for people like this working to shift the landscape, update the DSM and educate professionals. It’s much needed. Sending love to you. You are the best mum your son could have had. He must have felt your love so strongly ♥️✨

  • @joannedobkin3363
    @joannedobkin3363 Před 7 měsíci +13

    I sought out therapists for the loss of my mom and even with good insurance you can’t find qualified help . One asked for $300 45 mins out of pocket another $175. Weekly. I make min wage. The $175 guy said he has no time for charity cases and needs his night time slots for the wealthy clients that can afford his time. I pay almost $2,000 a month for good health insurance. My entire paycheck. It’s hopeless to find good help. People say move on. I can’t move on having flash backs on how my mom was treated by my family. 😢

    • @elainer8288
      @elainer8288 Před 6 měsíci +2

      I lost my dad in the most horrible way, but I have faith that we will see our loved ones again. Whatever created us had a plan for us to live a good life and it doesn't make sense if we never see them again. I really think we will. Life is so much more than we can see and know. How can so many people be so sure they will never see their loved ones again? Why would it be this way? People tell me "let him go" etc and I find this is a ridiculous piece of advice. I have faith in my heart that we will see them again. Imagine that you are suffering so much and don't even know that you will actually meet again? She wants you to do the best possible now and my dad wants the same thing for me. Fill your life with a good friend. I think this is the best thing we could do. I don't know if these professionals can really help if they just care about money, and not really about helping people. I think people in our situation need human warmth. You can talk to me if you want. 😊

  • @emmaab888
    @emmaab888 Před rokem +49

    Just watching this can actually gives some the knowledge they need to prevent their own suicide, for me it has been gratitude and remembering life isnt about the goals and reaching them but about the entire journey and the most important relationship is the one with yourself. Helping others may actually help you help yourself and can be healing in itself. Taking accountability for your own life and focusing on what you can control and letting go of what you can't. Detachment - not allowing anything to own you.

    • @Karla-yi5ld
      @Karla-yi5ld Před 10 měsíci +1

      Yes. I agree. That’s the first time I heard anything about goals and failing especially when failing with a family. That clicked with me, also with being a perfectionist and trauma in childhood. I’m have several of those.

    • @mitch5222
      @mitch5222 Před 9 měsíci +3

      That is true. But living in constant fear, traumas, pain, in such a society is also not ok. I wish i had courage.

    • @TheFracturedfuture
      @TheFracturedfuture Před 8 měsíci +1

      This comment has been regurgitated a million times.

    • @donnabuscarello450
      @donnabuscarello450 Před 8 měsíci

      I hear you​@@mitch5222

    • @peanut1001x
      @peanut1001x Před 6 měsíci

      excellent well said

  • @taffycat93
    @taffycat93 Před 6 měsíci +33

    Simple answer, I believe suicide is caused by lack of hope. That things won't get better.

  • @AGCT8
    @AGCT8 Před 6 měsíci +6

    OMG ! What a remarkable, special doctor he is. The world needs more professionals with a heart and compassion like he has. The interviewer was excellent too! Thank you both!

  • @delializarraga9638
    @delializarraga9638 Před 7 měsíci +21

    Here’s an expert telling us that since 1999 suicide has increased in the United States significantly. The reason… Screen time social media.
    I think we’ve all known the changes to our society social media, and being sucked into that existence was dangerous, but who knew it could be this dangerous. God help our children.

    • @trinleywangmo
      @trinleywangmo Před 6 měsíci +4

      Actually, there has been a sharp increase the world over since during and post-pandemic. Children and the elderly the world over are offing themselves like never before. The world is bleak and desolate (wait! That's my depression speaking!).

    • @delializarraga9638
      @delializarraga9638 Před 6 měsíci

      @@trinleywangmo
      Interestingly enough, this doc says and believes that suicide is almost 100% preventable… 🤔🤔🤔
      I guess it’s about intervention and the timing therein…

    • @trinleywangmo
      @trinleywangmo Před 6 měsíci +1

      @@delializarraga9638 It's about connections. People felt/feel isolated and lonely. In those moments, and when you truly ARE alone, and if you have seemingly insurmountable life/health problems, it's hard to resist.

    • @GHO5tMod3
      @GHO5tMod3 Před 6 měsíci +1

      I’ve noticed when I take a break from my phone I feel a lot better

  • @justmadeit2
    @justmadeit2 Před 7 měsíci +28

    I’m on a psychiatric unit now with severe depression. It’s torment

    • @mylittlekittens
      @mylittlekittens Před 7 měsíci +3

      They allow cell phones there?

    • @justmadeit2
      @justmadeit2 Před 7 měsíci +4

      @@mylittlekittens I’m in England. Yes, the unit im in does

    • @aleccullen2696
      @aleccullen2696 Před 7 měsíci

      If you're in England, you have a lot to be depressed about. Sign yourself out and move to a place that isn't f___d. Maybe Portugal. Anywhere but the UK. You'll feel like living again. I did it. It worked. @@justmadeit2

    • @juliebryant3968
      @juliebryant3968 Před 7 měsíci +1

      ​@@mylittlekittenswell its not prison is it...

    • @mylittlekittens
      @mylittlekittens Před 7 měsíci +3

      @@juliebryant3968 In US, psych hospitals do not allow cell phones to patients or visitors as they feel that they may be used for photography and a patients identity is very private during a psych admission. Not sure about cell phones in prison.

  • @rknoxmusic
    @rknoxmusic Před 5 měsíci +4

    Constant severe pain without relief will make you suicidal. Timely treatment is important and when that doesn't happen and your mental and physical state is getting worse people reach their limit in what they can handle.

  • @shosho4real
    @shosho4real Před rokem +38

    This is the most insightful episode on this podcast. I gained lots of value. Most people are going through these issues but have no source of expression.

  • @mischahowell5775
    @mischahowell5775 Před 10 měsíci +14

    I'm interning in NY Health and Hospitals in mental health and substance abuse. I'm a CRPA and my job is to advocate for change within the system. This video was very valuable to see. Thank you for your work!

    • @angelabluebird609
      @angelabluebird609 Před 6 měsíci

      Thank you for your work! Hope you have a long and successful career.

  • @Agnet_Faze
    @Agnet_Faze Před 6 měsíci +79

    Everyone gets hurt in life....But you have people who get hurt and become strong and emotionless...and you have people who get hurt but they become tired and emotional... Too emotional that they feel down like a drained battery....And they just want to sleep forever...

    • @ChrisTian-co4oc
      @ChrisTian-co4oc Před 5 měsíci +2

      So are there just these two ways? Strong AND emotionless or tired AND emotional? Don't think so. Strong and emotional in a positive way could be the right path.

    • @Agnet_Faze
      @Agnet_Faze Před 4 měsíci +2

      ​@@ChrisTian-co4ocUnfortunately that's not how it works....

    • @ChrisTian-co4oc
      @ChrisTian-co4oc Před 4 měsíci

      @@Agnet_Faze Oh well? Never followed a good coach/ therapist? For example Dr. Scott Eilers or Therapy in a nutshell? Do you really think overcoming your demons means to become like a stone? No way☹️

    • @Agnet_Faze
      @Agnet_Faze Před 4 měsíci

      @@ChrisTian-co4oc no it is not really like a stone that J mean... It's just that you understand your emotions and know how to use them wisely ... But when you appear in front of people it will only give people the impression that you are emotionless...
      When you are hurt you just understand how to value yourself and your emotions and you tend to not care about people...You learn how to not trust easily...Which is a good thing...Because people will not be able to break you that easily...

  • @luckystrike8547
    @luckystrike8547 Před 6 měsíci +12

    I just can't fathom a society that requires so much to live. I can't even get treatment in my country (the US) because I am uninsured. How are we supposed to hang on when we are disposable at our jobs, everything is so expensive and literally nobody cares whether you get housing or starve. Everything is about profit and if you can't conform to the wishes and desires of this economy, they treat you like trash!

    • @wulfsorenson8859
      @wulfsorenson8859 Před 2 měsíci +1

      Well you all got what you voted for. Suck it up x

  • @robyntatelman7233
    @robyntatelman7233 Před 6 měsíci +11

    Thank you for making this video. I am so alone. I want to be alone, I think, I certainly don’t want anyone to help me or try to help me or see me, because no one understands except you. This is the first time I’ve ever experienced the feeling of being really understood, and cared about in so long. Probably at least since my mother died almost 20 years ago and that is my hole, I still felt it when she was alive, but it gave me purpose to make her happy because she loved me, she loved me as much as she could. But I never showed her my real self because I didn’t want her to be sad. There’s nothing she could’ve done and to make her sad would’ve been horrible. Now I am just a burden to myself and my husband, who doesn’t really understand me and never will. I don’t really think he loves me. He goes through the motions, but his best friend is the television, even if I am begging him to look at me or talk to me, but I am afraid to be completely alone, so even though he’s cruel, it’s better than being alone with my thoughts and I’m always scared to death and I don’t know what I’m waiting for. Anyway, thank you, I have never experienced someone who is so empathetic and knowledgeable. I just wish you were here. Thank you thank you thank you.🙏🏼 ❤

    • @nancyhanscom1374
      @nancyhanscom1374 Před 6 měsíci

      I feel you. Everyone makes my husband happy but me. 56 years and have been thru so many heartaches of always doing what he wants. People would never believe the man I live with. 😢

  • @laurieberry162
    @laurieberry162 Před 7 měsíci +14

    Healing. I have hypothyroidism and I wasn’t on the therapeutic dosage of levothyroxine so I was feeling depressed and crappy. I had a long crying spell in the hospital. Now I take a higher dosage of levothyroxine and I feel better. Medical problems like hypothyroidism, cancer, and Alzheimer’s disease can cause people to do away with themselves. If you find out that you have Alzheimer’s quickly, there’s medication that you can take to slow down the forgetfulness.

  • @Cuban_Mala
    @Cuban_Mala Před 7 měsíci +10

    I work for 988 and I am going to send this video to my team

    • @lisalasers
      @lisalasers Před 6 měsíci +2

      someone on your team hung up on me. i tell people not to trust this hotline.

    • @Cuban_Mala
      @Cuban_Mala Před 6 měsíci +4

      @@lisalasers So one bad apple huh? I'd never hang up. And the ones surrounding me would never.. I am sorry that happened to you but to tell others not to use the line that has saved so many lives is careless of you

  • @sharonendler1467
    @sharonendler1467 Před 11 měsíci +46

    How can you not include unrelenting physical pain, intractable insomnia for over a year , loss of all relationships;, loss of home, loss of ability to financially support oneself and decades of trauma that medicine does nothing for and complete loss of hope in the Lord and profound shame

    • @katygirl9221
      @katygirl9221 Před 9 měsíci +2

      Exactly what I was thinking. I've had same as you. Chronic 24/7 backpain for 4 years. The meds don't work. I'm sleeping better now but now I'll sleep for 3 or 4 days no food or water. I'm so sorry.

    • @Sg-de9wo
      @Sg-de9wo Před 7 měsíci +3

      they did.

    • @taghazoutmoon5031
      @taghazoutmoon5031 Před 7 měsíci +2

      I lost job, home, divorce, separation in new romantic relationship. At least I have some savings. Xanax helps with insomnia, but I ran out, so not sleeping for a week now. I'm planning to move and look for a job and buy a house. That's stressful too.

    • @peanut1001x
      @peanut1001x Před 6 měsíci

      that'll do it

    • @user-pv4vq8ni4q
      @user-pv4vq8ni4q Před 6 měsíci

      You sound as if UV fibromyalgia.insommia tramua

  • @GodHelpMe369
    @GodHelpMe369 Před 8 měsíci +9

    The noble mirage:
    Enlightenment...
    To end all suffering!
    To bypass all emotional pain and trauma…
    Until...
    My body or my mind remind me they are there!
    I then feel like a failure-I need to seek more, try harder or even:
    “I am already enlightened I just have to be it.”
    More trips around the transcendence mountain...
    The only way off the trail is inside out!
    I must face my pain, look at my repressed emotions, and rediscover my authentic self...

  • @joannedobkin3363
    @joannedobkin3363 Před 7 měsíci +17

    My mother had dementia. I tried everything to help and my siblings couldn’t care. When my mother passed away 10 days after I begged family to step in and do their part it was my son’s birthday that she departed. I can’t move on and some days I just want to be with my mom. My siblings abandoned me alone I said goodbye at my mother’s casket. I go to two bereavement groups but neither can erase the trauma. I cry every day and it’s going to be 2 years in July. 😢

    • @kathyfrancis9229
      @kathyfrancis9229 Před 6 měsíci

      Please hang in there. I stayed with my m as many through the active dying . I thanked God when it was over. I had no one. You have to keep fighting. I am suffering major depression. This happened three weeks ago. Two things have helped. Talking to a therapist and writing. I write all the time. Most times I can't understand what I've written. The road seems relentless. Please don't give up. You sound like you are vert special

    • @diane5522
      @diane5522 Před 6 měsíci

      So sorry 😢. Take heart that you was the only one there for her and stood by her til the end. Fuxk them xx

    • @Threadbow
      @Threadbow Před 6 měsíci

      Your mother loved you v much as much as you did her.
      Thank goodness mum had you with her.
      Family are v bad to do this to you.
      Ot took me years to get over my father's death.
      I think your mum would want you to stay here and try to find some pleasant thing to do in your life.
      Something one day to make you happy
      She brought you up and gave you love and would want you to live.
      Much as she wants to see you again
      I'm.sure of it that she doesn't want you to go to her yet.
      Sending a big hug 🫂
      Your mum must've been a v v special lady.

    • @rodshore2242
      @rodshore2242 Před 5 měsíci +2

      You were the loyal one, the brave and the few.

    • @penniewyatt9391
      @penniewyatt9391 Před 5 měsíci

      You are her savior when she needed you. You are the strongest, you are the most brave. You did the hard thing when no one else would. You are the most important, selfless person in your circle and you now have to do the next hard thing and advocate for your own self care for your child. Support group. I am in a caregivers support group put on by the Alzheimer’s association, my husband has dementia and he cannot fathom what I am going through learning how to care for him and recover from breast cancer. I feel so validated by these other people going through the caregiver role, or lost their person after caregiving. The fact that they still attend after loss and still help us with tips and tricks and general advice speaks volumes about how compassionate other people are when they know exactly what we are going through. My group started with just one other lady in attendance, but it was better than my last entire year of conventional therapy because we were healing each other, not just complaining to a counselor.

  • @rdnkenki
    @rdnkenki Před 7 měsíci +8

    I have chronic pain and it has crossed my mind. I'm fine now

    • @ej_8888
      @ej_8888 Před 6 měsíci +1

      That's wonderful 🙏🏻✨

  • @geraldcrippen1649
    @geraldcrippen1649 Před 6 měsíci +16

    An extremely fatigued mind and body from years of suffering.

  • @normanmacfarlane6724
    @normanmacfarlane6724 Před 10 měsíci +28

    A terrific podcast
    I live with suicidal thoughts constantly. It is a thought that lives inside my brain.
    I have a counsellor and I constantly mention my suicidal thoughts with him.
    I do not want to die by suicide but the issues I am dealing with have the simplest of answers . . . to end it all.

    • @Crystalquartz964
      @Crystalquartz964 Před 10 měsíci +6

      Please stay Norman, you are wanted here

    • @user-ls5ik1vm3k
      @user-ls5ik1vm3k Před 9 měsíci +3

      I can relate. I speak to my therapist twice a week. Still trying to find the right meds, if any will help. Starting from square one, it seems. With a family history of mental illness on my father's side, I feel additional pressure not to just end it. My brother, father, and great-grandfather all committed suicide, and wow, have I wanted to for a long time. Yet, I feel as though I actually should not promise anyone, including myself, that I will not do it. Rather, make a promise to work and work on it, if one truly wants to live - not 'just survive.' The promise could be too much of that pressure. Sorry to say this, but my brother was the last to die in that manner (2001) and he promised and swore to our mom that he wouldn't. So, I will take it as easy as possible, though not too slow that I stop. How will I do that? Talk to my therapist (she's WONDERFUL) and be active in some way and promise only to try each day. Slowly, but surely, I will climb out of that dark pit, and perhaps make it out the woods.

    • @user-ls5ik1vm3k
      @user-ls5ik1vm3k Před 9 měsíci +1

      You deserve to live as well. Please keep trying.

    • @robinantonio8870
      @robinantonio8870 Před 9 měsíci

      Do not trust any one. Do not tell them you want to die. They will drag you away, lock you up ,forcibly drug you, and your circumstances will get worse not better. If they can't do something practical to change your circumstances, drugs and talking will not help .If you are going to do it shut your mouth and keep it to yourself.

    • @ts3858
      @ts3858 Před 8 měsíci +3

      I understand...for me it's the result of unresolved trauma...
      We must deal with the stuck pain/hurt trauma to heal ...you're not alone. 💕🙏For me also it's partly genetic ...generational trauma causing chemical imbalance in the brain ...depression n CPTSD .
      💕🙏

  • @BritzieR74
    @BritzieR74 Před 9 měsíci +17

    Try all of this in one year. Betrayed by a life partner who left me because 'Im getting older and need peace in my old age. I have no relatives. They all committed suicide. I lost my job because I fought FOR my tenants. Nex week will be my 3rd move for the year, I will lose my car and will soon be homeless. Give me one good reason to continue...just one

    • @deaniemack
      @deaniemack Před 7 měsíci +2

      Hi @BritzieR74 I hope you’re doing better & just want to reach out … please let me know how you’re doing & maybe I can be your “pen pal” to help with any loneliness or to try to cheer you up every once in a while 😇 Sending hugs and prayers 🙏😇❤️

    • @seanodwyer4322
      @seanodwyer4322 Před 7 měsíci

      @@deaniemack ahh hav $$$ stamps that need useing so post me att- Doctor- Sean O'Dwyer- 136- 140 Hobson street.- Auckland City. 1010. New Zealand.-

    • @kimlarso
      @kimlarso Před 7 měsíci +3

      Rock bottom is the very solid foundation in which to rebuild upon…….find a shelter close to a job opportunity area w bus transport and/or ride a bike then, get into housing you can actually afford & food stamps if u qualify 👉once in a stable job & housing 👉get you a dog & cat👉they love unconditionally 👉and a lot of time are better than human companionship ❤

    • @peanut1001x
      @peanut1001x Před 6 měsíci +2

      how are you going to do it? only thing stopping me is finding a method.

    • @wulfsorenson8859
      @wulfsorenson8859 Před 2 měsíci +1

      @@peanut1001xyeah same. Look into the dark net markets.

  • @reneeanthony73
    @reneeanthony73 Před rokem +44

    I've struggled with suicide since I was 8 years old, surviving incest by my father who shared me with a couple of friends and our neighbor, neglect by my mother and never getting me the help I needed.
    A abusive marriage,we worked really hard to make it better then he was killed in a car accident leaving me with three children, and now I've lost my 20 year old son to suicide 4 days after my birthday! I'm also a recovered addict who got addicted to pain medicine, and I'm now on methadone.
    I fight every minute of the day to not take my life, when I go on a walk It's really hard not to walk in front of a car, when I am trying to go to sleep it's so hard to stop thoughts in my head,I have to hurt myself to try and stop the thoughts in my head I've punched my arms and legs cut myself small ones so it's okay pinch the back of my arms, I've always had thoughts to stab myself with a pencil or pen but luckily I've not done it!
    I fought so hard for so long then my son beat me to it and he always told me he could not live without me that I would really disappoint him, but he turns around and does it, how do you come back from something like this?
    It's been 3 years the clock is ticking tic tok tic TOC, what do you do?
    I refuse to let him be by himself, they say when you complete suicide you don't go to heaven you stay here wandering around forever therefore how does a mother let their son walk this earth scared 😨😳😢😮 afraid lost when he could have me with him?
    I've made it almost 50 years my birthday is coming up and so is the anniversary of his death, I really would love to see my son again but I would also love to see the other side of 50 also, the reason I'm saying all of this is to try and show how much I've been through and how strong I've tried to be I'm not selfish I'm tired, I want to also see my grandchildren graduates get married have children,I want to see my son that is living have a child, so many people and so much life that hasn't been lived, it's a fight a real fight, wether I choose to or not I just want to say you don't have to be the victim you can be the victor you can be strong and right now I choose to live but if I do choose to see my son again I'm not a failure, I really did try hard!

    • @shosho4real
      @shosho4real Před rokem +6

      My dear you are not alone in the struggle. Always remember that

    • @Nothinglefttosay
      @Nothinglefttosay Před rokem +12

      Thank you for being so open. I’m 50 with a brain tumour.. and because of my illness, my entire family and friends won’t talk to me anymore.. I’ve been considering suicide but I’m such a gutless human to even try.. I have zero people in my phone contacts.. I’ve just got myself..( my own worst enemy)
      I’m sorry to hear your story.. it actually made me cry.. but I needed the reality read.. I really hope our lives get better ❤️‍🩹
      Kindest regards, James 😢

    • @shosho4real
      @shosho4real Před rokem +9

      How do Americans have all these crazy instances. In Africa our problems keep us sober. You're fighting for survival everyday. You don't have the luxury of even contemplating suicide. The hunger in your belly keeps you as alert as a watchdog.

    • @elleteablog
      @elleteablog Před rokem +3

      please choose your life, always. please.

    • @SamStone1964
      @SamStone1964 Před 11 měsíci +4

      ​@@NothinglefttosayWhy won't your family and friends talk to you?

  • @JK-yf2vl
    @JK-yf2vl Před měsícem +2

    Everyday we lose more of our humanity. And people who find it harder to cope leave permanently.

  • @EileenKelley-r3i
    @EileenKelley-r3i Před 8 měsíci +12

    Prescribing controlled substances without asking if they have an addiction or are in recovery from addiction can turn deadly. There are many physical issues not mentioned here that also cause suicidal thinking as a side effect - Sleep Apnea for example. Giving them benzos, ambien, and psychotherapy is not going to solve until the physical apnea is resolved. Hypothyroidism, Tramatic Brain Injuries, and having an addiction/alcoholism all cause suicidal ideation. It is imparitive that suicidal conditions be diagnosed with a cross-functional medical team that includes a neurologist, general practitioner, in addition to psychotherapy. It is not appropriate to address it with psychotherapy alone. And benzos should be a last resort. I recently had a suicidal client and it was Gabapentin that was the culprit. Taking her OFF the drug cleared up the suicidal symptoms within 4 days.

  • @fergusfitzgerald977
    @fergusfitzgerald977 Před 8 měsíci +9

    This is the absolute best most insightful discourse on this topic I have ever heard !
    I worked on a help line many years ago and was well trained - but could have done with this man's advice -this resonates with me !
    Hope this man's criteria becomes accepted for inclusion into the DSM !

  • @barbara5051
    @barbara5051 Před 7 měsíci +5

    He is talking truth from a person who was in that position....feeling entrapped and also fear of everything

  • @curiouslyme524
    @curiouslyme524 Před 2 měsíci +1

    This man is an angel on earth. He loves his profession & the people he treats.

  • @TheLatinMass
    @TheLatinMass Před 8 měsíci +16

    Asking someone if they have considered suicide, is as useful as asking a jihadist if they plan on jeopardizing the flight they are going on. It is laughable that someone would reveal plans for others to prevent.

  • @markthomas4083
    @markthomas4083 Před 22 dny +2

    19:30 mark, in my opinion, most people don’t care much about anyone other than themselves, sometimes they care about their kids. People or friends don’t appear to listen much, many people just don’t care, don’t want to be inconvenienced.

  • @urbansetter1
    @urbansetter1 Před 8 měsíci +39

    Suicide is childhood trauma so are all mental health disorders and a great deal of physical disorders and all addictions. They need to address this and start treating it

    • @joandebruin3847
      @joandebruin3847 Před 7 měsíci +4

      Human beings are more complicated-brain chemistry current social,work- and family situation ,learned behavioral patterns etc.all play a role in a person,s suicide risks.

    • @urbansetter1
      @urbansetter1 Před 7 měsíci +4

      @@joandebruin3847 ideation is anger and self hate turned inward. It is learned behavior. No one is born suicidal we are all born to love

    • @magzb2642
      @magzb2642 Před 7 měsíci +2

      Mental disorders are inherited..always with you..

    • @user-ts4rd7sv5n
      @user-ts4rd7sv5n Před 7 měsíci +3

      It cannot be only childhood trauma. Longitudinal studies are needed from before birth onwards: viruses, pregnancy conditions, babyhood, childhood etc. Multidimensional studies needed before you can attribute cause to childhood trauma. What about autism? Some addictions can be cured by good Mediterranean diet. Some mental ill health can be cured by Buddhism. To believe that "suicide is childhood trauma" is a very limited perspective.

    • @wallybingbang4350
      @wallybingbang4350 Před 6 měsíci +3

      The present cannot treat your childhood. It is in the past
      Broken people are broken for life
      Only scum hurt children - parents putting their children down are fucking horrible

  • @gailhoffmann9498
    @gailhoffmann9498 Před 16 hodinami

    Thank you for bringing Dr. Galynker on. I learned a lot from him. Our family, on both sides, has a history of suicide. Dr. Galyniker answered many questions for me. Good luck in getting your clinical trials approved sir.

  • @donniedark11677
    @donniedark11677 Před 9 měsíci +61

    Because living life is hell duh!

  • @windwhisprz
    @windwhisprz Před 6 měsíci +3

    Thank you for having Dr.Galynker as a guest. I appreciate his work and commitment and contributions to helping people with mental health issues. His knowledge and understanding set a healthy example for other professionals to strive for.

  • @renaelynn6376
    @renaelynn6376 Před 8 měsíci +15

    Rise of suicide since 1999 = social media??? Instant connection???screen time ^. income inequality, fracture of american dream. And an ^in stress.

    • @aleccullen2696
      @aleccullen2696 Před 7 měsíci

      Just watch the rise in suicides when Trump gets back into the Oval Office.

  • @delanodor
    @delanodor Před měsícem +2

    Divorce is the ruin of me. Everyone has his opinion. I can’t talk anymore. Take my heartbreak take my savings take my sanity. I’m smoking more than ever and I’ll never wish to harm anyone but all I want is to do is fix myself but it’s not easy

  • @ats-3693
    @ats-3693 Před 6 měsíci +5

    I think about suicide nearly everyday because of the horrible debilitating anxiety that I also feel nearly everyday.

  • @fourshore502
    @fourshore502 Před 8 měsíci +22

    for me part of the allure of suicide is just that its my choice, my very personal action. something that i have control over and noone else. i feel like almost everything i do is something i have to do, for someone else, whether its for the government, my boss, my family or whatever. but suicide is my own.
    well that and also just feeling very overwhelmed by internal and external stressors and seeing very little hope of things improving in the future.
    poor personal economy plays a big part in it also for me.

    • @alyssacoyle4845
      @alyssacoyle4845 Před 7 měsíci +4

      It is your choice but your choice will effect many in your life. Having found my father hanging two weeks ago I cannot forget that vision ever. I cannot stop thinking about how much I wish I told him I needed him, how much I loved him. I will never stop questioning if I could have done something different to help him with his pain

    • @fourshore502
      @fourshore502 Před 7 měsíci

      im so sorry to hear that. do you know why he did it? was it totally unexpected?
      i am not suicidal currently my situation is acceptable at the moment thank you and yes one of the reasons i havent done it before was like you said because of the famil especially my mom@@alyssacoyle4845

    • @hannesRSA
      @hannesRSA Před 7 měsíci +1

      I wish you could confide in someone and let them take the burden from you. I know that my son would have been completely fine if he confided in me. You have to accept that your mind is malfunctioning so you may be incorrectly deciding that no one can help

    • @fourshore502
      @fourshore502 Před 6 měsíci +1

      hey im so sorry to hear that and yes part of why i never seriously thought of doing it was because of the effect it would have on my family. strangely my response comment was deleted. i am currently not contemplating suicide. i just wanted to explain suicide ideation to those who may not understand it.@@alyssacoyle4845

    • @Olehenry
      @Olehenry Před 6 měsíci

      Therein lies the contradiction. You strongly desire to act, and you know you'll have efficacy. But you're not practicing action, rather passively being blown here and there, and blaming others for your experience. I'd say it's time to dig yourself out of your hole, with passion, and set sail! Watch FightClub, and then plot out your own Tyler Durden adventure. Maybe read a little Ayn Rand too ... and then you'll maybe see that suicide is both boring & anti- "your own".

  • @kassandrahart6329
    @kassandrahart6329 Před 7 měsíci +12

    Ironically, I have been plagued with C-PTSD, general depression/anxiety, disorder since 1999 when I was rear-ended by an impaired driver and my lower spine was shattered. As a result I lost everything I had worked hard for... my starter/retirement house, my grooming salon, and my brand new Honda Civic. I've had to give up just about everything I once found enjoyment in-feeling like I'm always left out. Any friends I had have vanished (if they haven't died). With the state of our healthcare, I've received ZERO connections for counseling in many years and I'm in constant pain. All I can say is that I sincerely hope that Dr. - assisted euthanasia gets passed next month. As for calling 911, my advice is 'Don't!' Police are total assholes. At your lowest point, you can be assured that it will get even WORSE if the police are involved, making you feel MORE depressed. 😡😢

    • @seanodwyer4322
      @seanodwyer4322 Před 7 měsíci

      Police keep you broken in new Zealand and Australia too. - The Power go's too their heads

    • @user-pv4vq8ni4q
      @user-pv4vq8ni4q Před 6 měsíci

      Look up fibromyalgia

  • @verastanding
    @verastanding Před 6 měsíci +2

    BRILLIANT !!!! So good to see this Doctor with a diagnosis and trying to bring it to the DSM. It all made sense to me. I never told anyone that I was going to take my life. I didn't know how I survived until ten years later when my parents said they found me and fed me salt water to vomit, and kept me awake for hours by walking me around. I was sad I survived and life has always been somethiing I didn't want, until I was diagnosed with chronic depression and ADHD and started taking medication. I'm glad I'm alive now. I have to say, I did therapy, after therapy, after group meetings, after group meetings, looking for a way out of my suicidal thoughts and sadness of life. It never stopped it. Medication is the only thing that stopped me wanting to kill myself.

  • @kateb7155
    @kateb7155 Před 6 měsíci +6

    What an excellent, excellent, EXCELLENT and informative discussion about such a very important topic. I am very grateful Dr. Galynker committed his career to figuring this out. Thank you!

  • @joannedobkin3363
    @joannedobkin3363 Před 6 měsíci +2

    Yes my mom was very very special and an artist. I was kept from having her artwork that was thrown into a dumpster by my family but I rescued it out of the dumpster just in time before the rain came. My mother was really fantastic too good to be treated the way they treated her and her life’s work. 😢

  • @Sssssss527
    @Sssssss527 Před 7 měsíci +5

    Listening to guided mindful meditations had helped more than anything I’ve tried. I can find contentment in the moment. But thinking about the past and worrying about the first is my worst trigger.

  • @pamwehking2457
    @pamwehking2457 Před 7 měsíci +4

    My 39 y.o. son w/ history of drug&alcohol experimenting in teens, high IQ yet difficulty identifying w/ peers, went on to work on MA’s at Uof Chicago,School of Social Work. He started Prozac@18 unknown to us. At age 39, after a family vacation w/ us, he took a trip alone to northern CA and committed suicide, but all along had been seeing therapist, had meds, etc, but prior to trip hearing voices…but we never knew about the voices…😢It will be 5 years in April and at age 74, I cannot get over my grief & guilt…I finally sought treatment at MAYO for which I am thankful, but it causes such sadness b/c his care was not that good…Thank you for your work…this is such an amazing interview…I only wish we had more cooperation when I tried family therapy when he was 15…As his Mom, it is not easy to overcome my guilt because I think I felt suicide was a possibility…

    • @magzb2642
      @magzb2642 Před 7 měsíci +2

      So sad for you, my son, high achiever 33yrs etc, is always on the verge of suicide..finds how he is and who he is unbearable. Most days are agony. Medications little use..he is adamant it's no ones fault but his and no one else is to blame. I imagine your son felt you would know instinctively it wasn't your fault..they are wrong here but their mindset is malfunctioning. I think it's an inherited mental disorder and I feel my son's condition was made worse by medical intervention during his birth..living with unbearable mental agony is overwhelming.

    • @lisalasers
      @lisalasers Před 6 měsíci

      this was not your fault ❤. i’m sorry he’s gone. and it must hurt so much. but he was probably in lifelong pain and you couldn’t have relieved it gor him ❤❤❤❤ much love, friend

  • @peanut1001x
    @peanut1001x Před 6 měsíci +10

    most people don't have families & they do they don't care. most "parents" caused the problem & are very sick & horrible people who hate the person.

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 4 měsíci

      probably because of non-good supports we get this suicide becomes inevitable

  • @brandonscott7524
    @brandonscott7524 Před 5 měsíci +2

    Lost someone a few years back, still healing from it. But hearing that part about how the ones who felt most guilty were generally what kept the person around a little longer actually lifted some kind of weight off my shoulders.

    • @Guys_Love_Each_Other
      @Guys_Love_Each_Other Před 4 měsíci

      why losing someone affected you, like why you affected by there death

  • @TheDdlymccluney
    @TheDdlymccluney Před 9 měsíci +11

    Excellent interview and very informative. There needs to be more discussions like this.

  • @Billy-rr7re
    @Billy-rr7re Před 3 měsíci +2

    why is it that when someone hates something, let's say, the neighborhood they live in, nobody thinks they do because they are depressed or sick in the head. nobody prescribe them any drugs but, if a person hates this existence they are automatically diagnosed with depression. they are immediately prescribed drugs. why is it that people think that hating this existence is impossible for anyone unless they are sick or that there is something wrong with them. why is it that everyone must be forced to love being alive and everyone must be forced to stay here?.

  • @amybe3
    @amybe3 Před 11 měsíci +8

    I survived an attempt at 13 and 18. I was recently dx with autism at the age of 42. I truly live with passive suicidal ideation, but becoming a mom as a teen exponentially diminished my impulsive decisions to commit suicide. I became pregnant from the very person who raped me and was manipulated into marrying him. My parents are very catholic. I’m usually not depressed unless I’m going through stressful situation or hormonal changes etc. Even if I’m not too depressed, I can be attracted to the idea so stop feelings, stress, and the constant exhaustion am in.

    • @bibilee4247
      @bibilee4247 Před 3 měsíci

      Having autism is also a huge risk for suicide that isn’t talked about enough. 😢

  • @Dolce3339
    @Dolce3339 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Feeling nothing is better than feeling pain (physical or mental).