Living with Autism: Welcome Home Stevie

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  • čas přidán 10. 07. 2016
  • Murray and Janine Alexanders' autistic son Steven had never been violent. However, 18 months ago a change in his school and his medication triggered a journey into hell for the entire family. With no other help available, Murray and Janine were forced to have Steven removed from their home by police and committed to Waitakere’s secure mental health unit. Months of legal wrangling ensued to have Steven placed in suitable accommodation. Now he’s ready to come home.
    Murray and Janine are not alone. At present there are dozens of families with autistic children in NZ who are in desperate need of help.
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Komentáře • 840

  • @JuanOyola
    @JuanOyola Před 7 lety +322

    Mr. and Mrs. Alexander should be commended for helping their son to live a full life. The Alexander family is quite extraordinary. My love to them.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +8

      They are an amazing family Juan! Thanks for watching!

    • @JuanOyola
      @JuanOyola Před 7 lety +12

      The Alexander family is pretty amazing. Would you mind sending them my best? I do have a disability, though not as severe. This family faces a lifelong challenge, but they have a lot of courage.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +5

      Yes we can pass that on Juan! Thanks for your kind words!

  • @4SherylB
    @4SherylB Před 3 lety +64

    I so admire the caregivers in these assisted living spaces. I wish the very wealthy people of the world would direct their extra resources into housing/caregivers for the disabled. It is so needed. Sending good wishes to this family and all the families out in the world. I see myself mirrored in these parents faces - the worry, love, concern, fear.

    • @FallingGalaxy
      @FallingGalaxy Před 3 lety +4

      Unfortunately, the majority of the wealthy are too busy greedily gobbling up even more of the wealth from the rest of the world, and stomping on other humans, detached and near sociopathic in their actions anymore. We should try to regain power in our countries and take it away from the wannabe oligarchies that have taken over and want to hold onto their power to keep the huge money rolling in, at ALL costs to other human life.

    • @texasbandera7320
      @texasbandera7320 Před 2 lety

      I fully agree!

    • @reneastle8447
      @reneastle8447 Před 2 lety +2

      If I'm one of the very wealthy people, I will direct my extra resources to them, it's called being a Good Samaritan.

    • @lucyii
      @lucyii Před 7 měsíci +1

      What a lovely comment. And I agree with everything ❤

    • @daniellewallace1996
      @daniellewallace1996 Před 2 měsíci

      I couldn't do that job. It takes a special kind of person to care this much.

  • @nicoroshan
    @nicoroshan Před 7 lety +203

    the part when he said "cupcake " i cried , it was a super sweet moment

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety

      Thanks for watching Federico, we hope you enjoyed the episode

    • @lv7118
      @lv7118 Před 6 lety +4

      Federico nicolas Andreoli ...yes ,It's like the little boy from before it all went wrong came out.

    • @asabovesobelow7981
      @asabovesobelow7981 Před 5 lety

      arghhh ditto!! tlc

  • @nicolasbettger5747
    @nicolasbettger5747 Před 5 lety +695

    Who else is up at 2AM watching all of these for some weird reason

    • @deeedsworld
      @deeedsworld Před 5 lety +7

      3:35am lol

    • @resoldbaby7687
      @resoldbaby7687 Před 5 lety +1

      436

    • @riannamajzoub5241
      @riannamajzoub5241 Před 5 lety +20

      Not a weird reason. I know this type of story too well. I am like Steven but at a higher level of VC(Verbal Communication). I live in the US were here they don't care unless you can pay. I stopped trusting people and wanted to commit suicide at the age of 11 landing me in the Texas State hospital. I am 26 now living on my own. My relationship with my family is mutual but my father is a work in progress due to years of emotional abuse.

    • @curiousgeorge6921
      @curiousgeorge6921 Před 5 lety

      😂😂

    • @theoneandonlyladysmith2578
      @theoneandonlyladysmith2578 Před 5 lety +1

      Nicolas Bettger 3:54 am

  • @elmienliebenberg9145
    @elmienliebenberg9145 Před 3 lety +18

    When Steven hugged his mum it all became too much. I burst into tears. Steven is not at all responsible for what happened. He cant control Autism, the Autism controls him. You could see he looooovvvvess his mum. He is such a sweet boy💕💕💕💕🌷🌷🌷🌷

    • @daniellewallace1996
      @daniellewallace1996 Před 2 měsíci

      Poor sweet Steven is trapped in a body/mind that cannot let him express his true self. That would be so awful.

  • @np100
    @np100 Před 11 měsíci +4

    The doctor who prescribed those antipsychotics should be sued.

  • @LuckyBadger
    @LuckyBadger Před 7 lety +310

    Oh, mama. {{{hugs}}} I cried right with you. Don't let anyone judge you, EVER. Mums want to fix everything and make it OK for our kids, and it breaks out hearts when we have to admit that we don't have all the answers. You are an amazing family, and Steven is lucky to have you.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +4

      Hope you enjoyed the episode ! Thanks for watching!

    • @Barbarawr
      @Barbarawr Před 6 lety +1

      Proud Zionist j

    • @yvonnespearing
      @yvonnespearing Před 6 lety +8

      I had a son who had that..and he jumped of a cliff.dead..so sad Im mad back than we had no idea what was going on.It was a time in my life I wanted to die...now I have 3 sons one with asperbugers..hes fine.

    • @melissakalmbach4518
      @melissakalmbach4518 Před 5 lety

      Ellie v toys

    • @Ltasty
      @Ltasty Před 5 lety +4

      Free Palestine

  • @62roxana
    @62roxana Před 5 lety +131

    My heart went out to this family. Poor mum getting cancer while all this was going on. What strength this lady has. I hope she's doing really well today with her health.
    Such a loving family..
    I was scared when he started shouting in the corner of his room. I really feel for both parents, what it must have been like living with a aggressive big man, smashing holes in all the walls of their house. It must have been terrifying for them, hurtful, extremely sad. Loving the man who was doing it all. Knowing he only had the mind of a 3 year old. God bless this family

    • @TheOfficial_YoItSJaKe4091
      @TheOfficial_YoItSJaKe4091 Před 3 lety +7

      Yes, especially since my family is also an Autism family. In fact, my severely autistic bro had these problems. Thank GOODNESS he’s doing better. I thought his label wouldn’t lie to him in terms of extreme behavior. He is much more calm, kind, gentle, sincere, so much more. I love him to death and hope he has a great rest of life, if I do eventually move out in my 20s to 30s, but of course, I’ve still got a long way to go! Still got the rest of High School.

  • @cyrene7784
    @cyrene7784 Před 4 lety +14

    Jeez that poor mother is just terrified of him. This is just wrong.

  • @friendoftherese1
    @friendoftherese1 Před 7 lety +183

    Wow. I could so relate to all of this. My 24-year old son has been in a group living situation for two years now. We have had all sorts of self injurious behaviors, as well as aggressive ones. He tends to lash out mostly toward women, and pulls hair, head butts, and hits. He kicked me across the room once. We are so very grateful to have him in a loving home that is quite close to us, and I visit him an average of every other day. I feel safe, he feels safe, and he is cared for. Funds do need to be made for available for situations such as these, and the caregivers need to be paid a living wage.

    • @cassidyhampton4028
      @cassidyhampton4028 Před 7 lety +21

      Blobby Blob
      Seriously... do you think anyone hopes for an autistic child? You have no idea how incredibly hard this is.. Where is your compassion? I'm sorry for you, to you to be so shallow and judgmental of someone else's hardships in life.. it really speaks volumes of who YOU are.. I am an autistic parent and I didn't choose to be one. I have learned so many life lessons from my child.. I am a better person because of it. Pity you obviously aren't..

    • @friendoftherese1
      @friendoftherese1 Před 7 lety +22

      Thank you Momo R. Well said. It is hard to understand what it is like to raise a seriously disabled child unless you are in the thick of it, so I am not angry at Blobby Blob's comments. He or she just doesn't understand, and it DOES sound like my son is horrible. He isn't. He actually IS a charmer, and I love him with all my heart. He doesn't lash out very often; only when he is in pain, or frightened, or overwhelmed. Most of the time he is a lovely young man. I appreciate your kind comment and support.

    • @cassidyhampton4028
      @cassidyhampton4028 Před 7 lety +12

      friendoftherese1
      Oh how blessed we are to be a part of such tremendous unconditional love! Of course your son isn't bad, nor is mine.. lashing out is usually a way of trying to communicate in some way.. It's very hard to deal with. Everyone always says "How do you do it, being the parent of an autistic child must be so hard" And it really is, but it is harder on my son than anyone! He is my hero! The lows can be very low, but oh the highs are so much higher than parenting a NT child.. I have both. Just wanted to speak up, you are not alone! God bless you and your son 💕

    • @blobbyblob2573
      @blobbyblob2573 Před 7 lety +8

      Momo R yes it speaks volumes of who I am. It also speaks volumes of who you are - selfish. You are ok others being hurt because a person has a condition? Selfish is what are. When a schizophrenic doesn't medicate and kills someone in your book it's ok. Let anyone lash out at me for no reason that I have caused...they'll see who I am. Typical self entitled fool - that's what you are! Doesn't sound as if you've become a better person - you sound bitter and judgemental. I guess you feel short changed - do not take it out on others and fuck your feelings I don't care!

    • @blobbyblob2573
      @blobbyblob2573 Před 7 lety +1

      friendoftherese1 I can only go by what you had written/shown and sounded like a contradiction to me. Maybe I don't understand but there is no way anyone and I repeat ...anyone can understands every conditions it's impossible. If I was out and about and for no reason I was attacked do people really think I'll say...nah it's fine carry on. My comment was a realistic one.

  • @x4at197
    @x4at197 Před 2 lety +6

    I feel badly for the dog

    • @jnieswartz4878
      @jnieswartz4878 Před 2 lety +1

      Omg me too! I can’t imagine how scared the dog is

  • @brushoff098
    @brushoff098 Před 7 lety +134

    god bless the men taking care of him .. as if he is family. such kind souls

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +5

      Thanks for watching jk la! Hope you enjoyed and stay tuned!

    • @stevenbuell5387
      @stevenbuell5387 Před 4 lety +2

      God bless you sir am proud of you guy. We need more people like you .

  • @cedarwho7
    @cedarwho7 Před 4 lety +34

    My son is the same way. I'm a single mom though so I do it all. It's hard, I've got a lot of bruises, but there is no one to do it. Imagine having to be a full time care giver 24 hrs a day and never hearing "I love you" or even getting a hug..

  • @SarahAnthonyNarouski
    @SarahAnthonyNarouski Před 9 měsíci +2

    The sad thing is that this is the same thing that’s still happening now in 2023… autism NEEDS MORE RESEARCH AND MORE RESOURCES!!!

  • @hotgirladjacent
    @hotgirladjacent Před 5 lety +29

    Seeing him so happy in his family pool made me get teary!

  • @vggv1394
    @vggv1394 Před 6 lety +17

    I have a friend, and she has 3 boys with autism. I admire her very much!
    God bless you all!

  • @donnabassetti7299
    @donnabassetti7299 Před 5 lety +19

    Steven’s caretakers are heroes

  • @miscellaneouscell
    @miscellaneouscell Před 4 lety +20

    Autism during the adolescent years is probably the toughest time.

    • @TheOfficial_YoItSJaKe4091
      @TheOfficial_YoItSJaKe4091 Před 3 lety +1

      Even the high functioning people can struggle as well as the other two levels, specifically with online learning. I’ve had, at most, moderate anxiety when I was faced with comorbid and proceeded to shutdown.

  • @spott2714
    @spott2714 Před 7 lety +146

    Would love to see a follow up or something in the future of Steven :)

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +21

      We will take that on board for our future filming Amanda! Thank you for your comment!

    • @xyz-rx1ot
      @xyz-rx1ot Před 7 lety +1

      Attitude oh so you film these ?

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +12

      Yes we do! Hope you enjoy them!

    • @xyz-rx1ot
      @xyz-rx1ot Před 7 lety +5

      yes i love them very beautiful aspect of life

    • @PonFORDS
      @PonFORDS Před 6 lety +11

      Attitude Sup Attitude!! Is there a follow up with Steven and his family? I know I’m not the only one who would love to know how they are doing. If ya have done a follow up can y’all please point me in the direction of it? Thanks in advance an please keep the great vids coming!!

  • @thedanishvapingviking8473
    @thedanishvapingviking8473 Před 6 lety +37

    To the parents.. Your doing all you can. giving all you got.. Be proud of yourselves.

  • @vikky1376
    @vikky1376 Před 4 lety +44

    Autism been around for years. You can't blame it on the Vaccinations. It runs in the family Genes. It just that the medical doctors are to late in diagnosing all these mental disabilities. Years ago they just call all of them... I won't say the word it not a nice word.. But yes I do have a 21 yrs old Autistic son. My advice is one day at a time learn his body language. Because most of the time they don't know how to express themselves or tell you what bothering them. My prays go out to you.. Stay strong

    • @Monica-gene1
      @Monica-gene1 Před rokem +1

      But do you think possibly infections like Strep for example could in some? Sort of like in PANS/PANDAS?

    • @patriciaarmstrong6601
      @patriciaarmstrong6601 Před rokem +2

      I don’t think its inherited for a second unless you marry your brother or sister or first maybe second cousin. What i do believe is god don’t make mistake same goes for Down syndrome. Things happen in life all baby’s don’t develop the same in there mommas tummy all you can do is love them and take one day at a time and you guys have no need to apologize for anything yaw did your best because if you don’t take care of yourself first you wont be able to help anyone.

    • @lauraweiss7875
      @lauraweiss7875 Před 11 měsíci

      @@patriciaarmstrong6601Google “Rett Syndrome” and tell me it’s not genetic. Ignorance is no excuse for repeating lies.

  • @janfilbeck6376
    @janfilbeck6376 Před 6 lety +40

    I want to assure parents that as their child matures the outbursts decrease. My brother-in-law was diagnosed with schizophrenia and probable Asperger's, onset age 18, and as a young adult man he was aggressive and violent as times. Though women can also be violent I believe that testosterone plays a huge part in aggressive behavior. As these men age they grow calmer. As an RN in a school for students with development challenges my favorite kids had autism. This video shows the best and worst of times these families deal with. Well done!

  • @rcpetty16
    @rcpetty16 Před 4 lety +5

    You did your best mum. You boy needed more help than your home could provide. I'm in shock seeing all the holes in the wall. I pray you heal from this and Steven gets help.

  • @KCsFunHouse
    @KCsFunHouse Před 7 lety +52

    What a great family, I just wanted to hug them all! I really wish they had a show like this in the states.

  • @Jchristgirl4284
    @Jchristgirl4284 Před 2 lety +3

    I'd never bring them back home

  • @EyesOnIlia
    @EyesOnIlia Před 5 lety +6

    I'm a mother of an Autistic 4.5 year old in Los Angeles, and this video really speaks to me and the issues that other people ignore or don't understand. Thank you for making this.

    • @Goatslide
      @Goatslide Před 3 lety +1

      I have an autistic son who is 11 years old. It worries me about his getting older/stronger as he is quite big now. This family is amazing with showing how difficult things can be,heartbreaking for them.

  • @rdu239
    @rdu239 Před rokem +2

    Its a very heartbreaking moment for any parent and family members when they see their child undergoes regression transitioning to severe autism; all the social connections and speech they gained, all of a sudden disappeared in just one day or in a few days. Its like the "soul" of a child has been taken out of its body, and whats left in its husk tightly placed in box or bubble

  • @kimberleymcdonald1663
    @kimberleymcdonald1663 Před 6 lety +24

    What a beautiful family, parenting at its finest.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 6 lety

      Thanks for watching kimberley! Hope you enjoyed 😊

  • @amarcy6
    @amarcy6 Před 7 lety +183

    I'm a teacher in Nevada from the United States. I've done most of my work in Special Education with focus on students who have Autism. I was also diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis almost exactly one year ago.
    I have the interesting perspective of having worked for years with people who have various disabilities (intellectual, emotional, physical) and now as I'm losing mobility and getting sicker, I find that I am now a part of the disability community myself. As such, I want to tell you how much I adore Attitude TV and wish we had something similar in America.
    Especially now that our country is divided, Attitude TV would be incredibly advantageous to use to spread compassion and encourage empathy. I can see it being an important tool in the classroom as school bullies are feeling emboldened and those who experience life from a "peripheral" aspect could find solidarity with others from across the globe who experience life similarly. Thank you so much for all you do!

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +11

      Hi Allison, thanks for your lovely comment! It's great to hear feedback like yours from the community. We hope you stay tuned and keep watching our videos!

    • @diane9247
      @diane9247 Před 6 lety +9

      Alley, you are so right about the turn the US has taken with public nastiness and blatant discrimination. Programs like Attitude make me long for our compassionate side to bloom again. I wish you all the best and send warm greetings and a hug from
      Oregon. 🌷
      I also want to thank the producers of Attitude for their outstanding work. I watch these programs with great pleasure!

    • @ViniSocramSaint
      @ViniSocramSaint Před 5 lety +1

      I know it has been 2 years, that spreading negativity is not good and that's an interesting point of view you got there (wanna know more by the way)... but you know why the country is divided, don't you?
      Taking your example about school bullies to make an analogy, some americans think that bullying is normal as it is just nature taking it's course under the natural law of the jungle favoring the strong and the victims are just losers and should just deal with this fact and stop complaining and blaming others for their shortcommings, which by the way are always their fault.
      Other americans say that bullying is just cruel to victims as they usually are in a situation were they can't defend themselves (not only the "naturally weak") and gives nothing in return to bullies, we should separate the involved into 3 categories as bullies, bully-victims (which get the worse treatment) and victims, try to understand why it happens, help all kids involved based on the categories, teach them from the start that trying to accert superiority by turning somebody else's life into hell is bad and all of this is responsability of the entire society, not just the involved or just the family.
      I bet you agree with 1 of these 2 types of americans and don't want to deal with the nonsense the other type of americans spew, because it is.. well... blatant nonsense. That is why america is divided. It's not about lack of love, it's about who is lying to advance a political agenda and who is telling truths to advance society.
      Anyways, I agree. Videos like that help kids understand "the different people", and understanding leads to compassion... but not if kids are told they should bully the different people to death and never be accepting though, these videos would only show them the face of the fair game, if you catch my drift. But that is not really bad depending on which side you chose.
      So... ideals should we teach our kids about bullying? Pick a side

    • @riannamajzoub5241
      @riannamajzoub5241 Před 5 lety

      Thank you for your service to our country and our community. -Sincerly a Self Advocate.

    • @josephbarleta3373
      @josephbarleta3373 Před 5 lety +5

      Rest assured, Alley, that the more action Trump and his supporters take to bully and terrorize people, there is an opposite reaction. I find compassion everywhere! I find people doing everything in their power to 'make it right' with the people that are being HURT. It is amazingly brave and beautiful. Our next president will be a 'diamond' instead of this piece of coal.

  • @saskiagoh5851
    @saskiagoh5851 Před 3 lety +3

    This is like my son, when hes 1 1/2 yo, he caught a virus with rash all over the body. Before that he was all normal. After the virus he started exhibiting various autistic behaviours. Not overnight, but gradually

  • @jwalt8019
    @jwalt8019 Před 6 lety +21

    Unconditional love is powerful. I wish them the absolute best.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 6 lety +2

      Thanks for watching Jaii! Hope you enjoyed 😊

    • @janetdechiara9462
      @janetdechiara9462 Před 2 lety +1

      I have a grandson with same problem he also is in a home for about 4 years now we see him often we love him with all are heart God love these children

  • @Ku_xiaohai
    @Ku_xiaohai Před 5 měsíci +1

    Respect and ❤. That’s what I can give this family. I can feel their despair, hope, pain,joy and love for their son. I really hope everything is ok these 7 years later.

  • @jerialmendarez7480
    @jerialmendarez7480 Před 3 lety +2

    So very sorry for this young man and also his family. Autism is a cruel nightmare for these fractured families.

  • @kateg9302
    @kateg9302 Před 4 lety +4

    I worked with a man and family in a similar situation. I hope that dog was well protected too.

  • @meandthetribe2988
    @meandthetribe2988 Před 7 lety +225

    I'm really shocked the parents and the child had to go through being taken away in handcuffs to get 'help'. It is so wrong but far from your fault. What were the options? There were no options for these people. Why?

    • @sharonristau2475
      @sharonristau2475 Před 5 lety +16

      Well, I am more scared of them put in with adults when his mind is only 4yrs old. The others will take advantage
      of him and you will lose him forever. I don't worry about handcuffs they just don't want to be hurt temporarily
      to get him under control. He is a big boy and can really punch so you don't want doctor or caretakers
      to be hurt. There could a system for people you have what he has. But America government would have
      to set up a system and they are incapable to follow laws. They don't understand these kids, adults have
      mental illness and they should be handled differently

    • @michaelcaza-schonberger9282
      @michaelcaza-schonberger9282 Před 5 lety +14

      Me and the tribe unfortunately it happens at times. I had severe rage issues, and in my teen years I had a few arrests. It’s not that there’s no options, it’s sometimes the only option. I’m 32 years old and autistic.

    • @ShaggzVB
      @ShaggzVB Před 5 lety

      @paul8kangas No life and have to troll?

    • @summerdawn6777
      @summerdawn6777 Před 5 lety +5

      @paul8kangas YES. MY SON DEVELOPED AUTISM RIGHT AFTER THE VACCINATIONS.

    • @koisneurotypical
      @koisneurotypical Před 4 lety +8

      In the States, where I live with my autistic daughter, there just aren't adequate resources or support. It all starts w/in the educational system, but our system is deeply flawed. It's a really sad state of affairs, and I really commend this family for doing whatever it took to help their son.

  • @sakinahahmad197
    @sakinahahmad197 Před 7 lety +130

    Brave parents that did what's best. All the best with your bright future ahead

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +3

      Thanks for your kind words Sakinah!

    • @gameshowguy2000
      @gameshowguy2000 Před 6 lety

      Hey, you need to really watch your mouth. And calling autistic people that word is gonna get you in big trouble someday.

    • @aa-vk6hd
      @aa-vk6hd Před 5 lety +4

      @@gameshowguy2000 ???

    • @Rippenhengst
      @Rippenhengst Před 4 lety +3

      @@aa-vk6hd It may be he's suffering from a similar condition.

    • @pandanina
      @pandanina Před 4 lety

      @@gameshowguy2000 Can I help you? I hope you are doing better now........

  • @jenniferhargrave2181
    @jenniferhargrave2181 Před 7 lety +84

    Attitude, thanks for making these videos. They are very eye opening and educational.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +4

      Thanks for your kind words Jenifer! We really appreciate your support and I will pass on this comment on to the team. Thanks again for watching and stay tuned!

    • @62roxana
      @62roxana Před 5 lety +1

      Yes Jennifer, this has been a real eye opener for me also.. I feel so much for the families going through this.. I didn't realise they got worse as they got older.

  • @ThaBoogMan
    @ThaBoogMan Před 5 lety +7

    What a lovely kid. Even though he is battling his own demons! He still loves his mum and his family! And even through all his trauma and pain! Finds a way to cope with living away from his family. All while having a smile on his face! He is my new inspiration! God bless him 💛😊💛😊

  • @SpiritFox17
    @SpiritFox17 Před 4 lety +5

    Glad to see Steven is reintegrating back into his family’s home. I have high functioning Autism Spectrum Disorder so I feel for him and his family. Sending love and blessings to Steven and his beautiful family!

    • @BG-nm5xt
      @BG-nm5xt Před 2 měsíci

      Steven is visiting but still living in the group home, I believe.

  • @makalaka123
    @makalaka123 Před 7 lety +22

    what a beautiful story! this family is so strong to admit they need help and that they tried everything they possibly could! ☺️ bless them!

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety

      Hope you enjoyed the episode LAN 95! Thanks for watching!😀

  • @aprilrutan3608
    @aprilrutan3608 Před 7 lety +47

    Thank you for caring enough about others who may be in the same situation as your family was, to be brave enough to share your story. You did what was needed and what was best for all of you! I hope that you know in your hearts you did the right (although the hardest) thing. May you all continue to take the wonderful steps forward. I also will be praying for your cancer to be gone. You are a wonderful family. I hope to see updates.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +2

      Thank you for your kind words! Hope you enjoyed the episode and thanks for watching!

  • @carlagarrett3244
    @carlagarrett3244 Před 7 lety +24

    Thank you for your honest, and hopeful story. He has been able to grow and feel more secure in the company of others, he was very lucky to find such a place. I am glad your home was repaired too. You really put your lives into him, and I am so glad you have had the chance to spend more time with your daughter and as a couple.

  • @a.p2234
    @a.p2234 Před 5 lety +2

    I have a son with autism and I thank God every day that my son isn't an aggressive person. You have a very special boy and you are very strong, amazing parents. God bless your family 🙂

  • @MercedesStarr12
    @MercedesStarr12 Před 7 lety +43

    This one really pulled my heart strings because I know a family in those same shoes. My God I pray for this family! This was a great one Attitude!

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety

      thanks for the kind words Deborah, we hope the best for your friends and thanks for watching!

    • @brianeastman3547
      @brianeastman3547 Před 7 lety

      Deborah Noel , I do believe like I do believe like I believe we get by like I do believe in Miracles, the song by Jefferson Starship

  • @SuperMissblueeyes
    @SuperMissblueeyes Před 7 lety +12

    I'm so happy for him & his family that he now has a safe & happy home of his own, but can still visit his family.

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety +1

      Thanks for watching !Hope you enjoyed our channel and keep coming back! 😀

  • @melissabuttram6631
    @melissabuttram6631 Před 6 lety +21

    He was so very happy in the pool! ❤🤽‍♂️ That made ME so happy.😊

    • @austinwilliamson8776
      @austinwilliamson8776 Před 6 lety +2

      Melissa Buttram I have high functioning autism it has some kind of name I forgot it but i just wish people understood us better this world is a brutal and nasty place for people that have autism

  • @ObamAmerican48
    @ObamAmerican48 Před 2 lety +2

    I'm glad you have respite and placement options. I can see the weariness and sadness in your faces. You need and deserve support. That being said, autism isn't a mental illness. There's nothing a mental health professional can do to help severely autistic people except prescribe meds to sedate the aggressive behavior, which isn't treatment and isn't a long term solution.

  • @michaelcaza-schonberger9282

    To all the parents of kids (and adult kids) on the spectrum, you are my hero! As a 32 year old with autism, I know it’s not easy with us.

    • @francescocastellaneta
      @francescocastellaneta Před 4 lety

      hello I am a pediatric doctor specialized in autism, contact me by writing to the whats'app number: +393711582355, so we talk about it and I answer all the questions for the difficulties you have for your child.

    • @ginny3818
      @ginny3818 Před rokem

      Bless your heart

  • @gailrodgers3079
    @gailrodgers3079 Před 3 lety +2

    So sorry to see you go through all of this with your son Steven. My son Steve just turned 37 and while we never had an official diagnosis for him for years (Most people including doctors never having heard of autism back then) I knew what he had. He did start talking at two although there were many things that he couldn't/didn't want to do. When he got into his teens and as he was high functioning and trying to 'be normal', he would give us hugs that we called Steven hugs. He is tall and skinny so could put his arms completely around us and never touch us. I knew how far he had come when he started hugging me and would squeeze me a bit and I could feel his arms all around me. When your son was hugging you near the end of the video I could see he was doing a Steven hug as well which brought back these memories for me. Partly touching and partly not touching. I read a book once by Michael Palmer where several of the characters in the book were autistic. At one point he described perfectly a 'Steven hug' and I wrote to him because I had never yet read any book that had an autistic character that in anyway showed an autistic person. I said told him it was obvious that he had been around an autistic person and he told me that his son was autistic as well. I just want to encourage you, that you are not alone and while my son is on his own, and totally responsible financially for himself, it was a long path to get him there. He still struggles daily. He would like to be married and have children but has never been on a date. I don't think he could handle being married. I love him dearly and now instead of me worrying about what would become of him, he worries about what will become of me as I have very bad arthritis and he knows I am losing many abilities to do things.
    I see that this video is from at least 4 years ago and I hope that your Steven has continued to make good progress and that your health also is okay in regards to your breast cancer. Sorry, I do get long winded, but it is nice to be in contact with someone that begins to understand in some way what you are going through. My Steve was born autistic and one of the first signs was him not taking to nursing. The nurse had to show me a special way to hold him. So 4 days after he was born he got his first meal! So much was so different about him compared to his big brother.

  • @ourstereohome
    @ourstereohome Před 5 lety +7

    This broke my heart to watch, but I wanted to say how much it meant that you shared such a painful part of your lives. Thank you, and God Bless you and your family.

  • @chopsticksforlegs
    @chopsticksforlegs Před 7 lety +34

    It tragic dealing with a child with special needs. I'm glad the family for help and I hope the mum who had the breast cancer diagnosis is well.

  • @johnsigsworth6979
    @johnsigsworth6979 Před 3 lety +2

    When I'm 19 I'm going to college and study law business and sociology and economics and social media and my autism and anxiety but people know me better than I am now because I'm just autistic and I'm just really proud of myself and I'm going to be a mcdonalds cashier and I think university is particularly good for me because I focused on my strengths and gcse I know maths was a bit difficult and challenging things that people would be a human and my family and friends and teachers and assistants and helpers are very proud of me and I'm just really happy and grateful and I'm just carrying on my own business and I'm just OK

  • @janedoebean8599
    @janedoebean8599 Před 5 lety +5

    I never cry..I watch a lot of things n I feel sympathy and worry...but this one? I cried like a baby with these parents. I feel the heartbreak, love, worry, and fear they both have for Steven. It must be so very, very difficult for everyone involved. I hope everything has improved for this loving family. Truly and from my heart. ♡ from a small town, U.S.A.

  • @kiwisweetheart71
    @kiwisweetheart71 Před 5 lety +12

    I am so sorry you have had to live through this nightmare. And it was good to see your precious son, happy in his home, and yours. There needs to be much better packages of care and funding for our most vulnerable citizens, especially the young people who have autism. There needs to be safe respite houses, that parents can freely access, and when needed, lovely houses, with the right carer support, for if/when young adults can no longer live at home, with their parents. All the best for the future, Steven and family.

    • @stevenbuell5387
      @stevenbuell5387 Před 4 lety +2

      Sure does it makes me angry that there not. I deal with some of this with my son . united states need to do a better job

    • @kiwisweetheart71
      @kiwisweetheart71 Před 4 lety

      @@stevenbuell5387 So does NZ, friend.

  • @xMariaAngelx
    @xMariaAngelx Před 4 lety +3

    I cried watching this having a child with autism myself, I will say in the United States they have committed so much time to research, doctors, new medications, therapies and actual day schools that help each individual learn coping mechanisms. Please don’t ever doubt your decisions because each one you make is out of pure love and empathy for your child looking for some kind of hope, you are wonderful parents it’s the healthcare systems that need to research and offer more options for our children.

  • @misssmarteepants3465
    @misssmarteepants3465 Před 4 lety +2

    I just cried so hard. I know she was grieving so deeply for the child she had while trying to cope the child he became.
    It shows an incredible amount of love to have to let him go. I can’t imagine the heartache.

  • @Sarah.Riedel
    @Sarah.Riedel Před 6 lety +22

    Oh my goodness, right at 20:37 you can finally see a lovely, warm, affectionate personality coming through. What a sweet guy. The frustration he must feel in being unable to properly communicate in the way you want has to be literally unbearable. I lived in NZ for two years and had no idea their mental health and social services systems had degraded to such a point. Coming from America I always felt like they'd had it figured out compared to us.

    • @francescocastellaneta
      @francescocastellaneta Před 4 lety

      hello I am a pediatric doctor specialized in autism, contact me by writing to the whats'app number: +393711582355, so we talk about it and I answer all the questions for the difficulties you have for your child.

  • @user-zx5kq6hs9d
    @user-zx5kq6hs9d Před 5 lety +2

    What an amazing family, lots of hard work and worth it. The love from his parents is bountiful, so lucky for Steven. Bless them.

  • @urigonzalez6300
    @urigonzalez6300 Před 5 lety +51

    This was really hard for me to watch without getting emotional thinking about my own son with autism .

    • @findingmyway8375
      @findingmyway8375 Před 4 lety

      Uri Gonzalez me to love but we gonna get threw it

    • @gailrodgers3079
      @gailrodgers3079 Před 3 lety

      I as well. Don't know the age of your son, but mine is 37 when autism wasn't the diagnosis on the tips of everyone's tongue like today!

  • @vanessaallan7311
    @vanessaallan7311 Před 5 lety +2

    Well, I have to say a BIG thank you for taking us into your home and sharing your family, its so good to open up the dialogue use these social media outlets for educational purposes. Mom, Dad wow such love and strength keep doing what you're doing. Regards from Timaru S Island

  • @nicolepeters6719
    @nicolepeters6719 Před 2 lety +2

    Watching this and it breaks my heart to see the pain in his mum's face as she speaks about how difficult caring for Stevie eventually got. I have a 7 year old son with autism and I worry so much about him as he gets older.

  • @bxchicc7799
    @bxchicc7799 Před 5 lety +11

    This made me cry. I’m a mom of 5 and three of my boys have autism. I live in nyc. My 14 year old is very aggressive, non verbal still wears pull-ups. He is on 5 different medications for his adhd and aggressive behavior towards himself and others. He’s super strong and when he gets mad it’s not nice. But when he’s sweet he’s sooo sweet lol. I advocate hard for him. My other two are not as severe and have no behavioral issues. I LOVE all people on the spectrum. I LOVE all people who are different. I just have a soft spot for them all. Makes me so emotional. My14 year old has a 1:1 on the bus and in school at all times. I got him out of horrible special ed public school because they was just neglecting my baby. I gotta free lawyer *She’s awesome* and she helped me get him into a beautiful non public school up in westchester county. The school and people are wonderful. I know that my son is 100% safe there. I always need help always looking for more. I love 💕 my children and just want the best of the best for them all. I wish I could live forever just so I’d know they would be ok always💙💙💙💙💙

    • @Rippenhengst
      @Rippenhengst Před 4 lety +1

      You can be very lucky with all that service for your son.
      I hope you and his siblings will never be the victims of his aggressions.

    • @stevenbuell5387
      @stevenbuell5387 Před 4 lety +1

      I feel you on that my son super strong i weight 250 lbs and he can push me a little at times. I work out . i am like the only one who can handle him at times. However he loves my lady amy she weights only 105 lbs and you have to not be scared and be blunt there

    • @bxchicc7799
      @bxchicc7799 Před 4 lety +1

      @@Rippenhengst He has attacked me at times and his older brother. I know he doesn't mean it. It must be so damn hard not to be able to speak!

    • @bxchicc7799
      @bxchicc7799 Před 4 lety +1

      @@stevenbuell5387 you're absolutely right. I do try to be very stern, but i am only 5 feet tall and i feel like he thinks he can take advantage and knows he can overpower me at any given time. I hope all is well with everyone during this pandemic. God bless you all

  • @gillianbrookwell1678
    @gillianbrookwell1678 Před 5 lety +3

    I can't imagine how heart wrenching it must have been for you both, but what else could you do? You must never ever feel guilty, It wasn't your fault and you did your very best for Steven. Nobody should judge you.

  • @sarahsuero
    @sarahsuero Před 4 lety +1

    Thank you for sharing. My heart goes out to all of you.

  • @senseofwonder4734
    @senseofwonder4734 Před 4 lety +1

    This is a lovely family. I am so sorry for the pain and struggles you've had to endure. I hope it helps to know that you are admired and loved. Sending lots of prayers up for you.

  • @thekingschannel9687
    @thekingschannel9687 Před 5 lety +1

    Thank you so so so so much for posting and sharing your story!!!!

  • @johnc8659
    @johnc8659 Před 3 lety

    Thank you sharing the raw nature of your family life within autism. So impressive you were able to produce such a lovely video that opens to the world the challenges involved in caring for your son. You got courage and great heart! It inspires me to go do my best.

  • @MKpixelfan
    @MKpixelfan Před 5 lety +1

    this is just so heartbreaking and what an incredible work these people are doing...my gosh...let's all be grateful simply for having our ability to be healthy.

  • @SuperMissblueeyes
    @SuperMissblueeyes Před 5 lety +2

    Thank you for sharing your story. You're doing an awesome job!

  • @paulinemcleggan7585
    @paulinemcleggan7585 Před 7 lety +7

    My heart goes out to you. I can't imagine how you have come through this. I have never known this extreme form of autism. God bless you

    • @AttitudeLive
      @AttitudeLive  Před 7 lety

      Thanks for watching Pauline, hope you enjoyed!

  • @jaikucucu9277
    @jaikucucu9277 Před 5 lety +2

    You did the right choice! I really admire you! It could not be otherwise, his situation is impossible to judge

  • @roviannematovu8136
    @roviannematovu8136 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you. What strong brave beautiful parents. I learnt so much. Real education

  • @annnara
    @annnara Před 5 lety +1

    High respect from bottom of my heart to all parents who love and take care of their conditional kid.....

  • @janettebrooks9370
    @janettebrooks9370 Před 4 lety +3

    I’m crying at the moment, such a strong and beautiful family. I work with people on the spectrum and see this every day. More needs to be done by governments to support families in crisis because it cheeper for them in the long run. Ignoring the problem only costs more in the future with staffing, crisis intervention, mental health for families and the list goes on

    • @stevenbuell5387
      @stevenbuell5387 Před 4 lety

      It dam sure does we a parents need to speack up protest . like hell for our kids i stand in a protest on washington for all the kids with audtism and adults . lets start a protest know

  • @c_turtle
    @c_turtle Před 5 lety +1

    I have never made a comment before but this documentary is an eye opener. Thank you for sharing your story. I had no idea autism was such a huge challenge. I understand now just a little bit better.

  • @deborahbeaulieu6740
    @deborahbeaulieu6740 Před 2 lety +1

    Heartbreaking !!! ❤❤❤❤❤❤
    Thank you for sharing your story!!!

  • @annettehaygood631
    @annettehaygood631 Před 5 lety +3

    What a great and wonderful brave story.

  • @cassbarker1966
    @cassbarker1966 Před 3 lety

    Ohhhh mumma bear! You did the right thing! Look at how he is thriving he has a group of wonderful men around him he has independence and is out in the world doing life, however that may look for him 🤗 it’s terribly difficult letting your children go at ANY time! How very lucky for him and your family to have this resource in the community 💗

  • @P51D-Mustang
    @P51D-Mustang Před 4 lety +9

    Man this was hard to watch!
    Who else had a golfball in their throat throughout the entire length of this programme?

    • @francescocastellaneta
      @francescocastellaneta Před 4 lety

      hello I am a pediatric doctor specialized in autism, contact me by writing to the whats'app number: +393711582355, so we talk about it and I answer all the questions for the difficulties you have for your child.

  • @jsmiley58
    @jsmiley58 Před 5 lety

    Awesome story. I'm direct support personnel in a group home for developmentally disabled. I've been watching some video's on autism, to have a better understanding of some of my clients. I'm so glad you found the help you needed, with such a wonderful group to help you. We do the same with alot of our clients, taking them out, giving them choices and positive reinforcement; supporting them through thier daily lives. Thank you for sharing, good luck, and much love :)

  • @GrannaMary
    @GrannaMary Před rokem

    I’m so glad you were able to find Stevie a wonderful place with outstanding carers. Prayers to you all.

  • @mar15545
    @mar15545 Před 13 dny

    I feel like he’s a lot smarter than a four year old, especially since EVERYONE grows and becomes wiser everyday, but he does, as a lot of autistic people do, have complications expressing himself. He can do things like plan what they’re going to make next time his mother visits, get himself ready, brush his teeth, etc, but you also see moments like when he’s being read a book and he gets distracted or just has something different going on in his brain and then gets really frustrated because he wants help with that thought (expressing it or maybe it was troubling him) and then trying his best to express it the best way he knows how. Even then, he said some words that should be paid attention to. I think this family has tried so hard and given so much and I am really proud of them. This is just me advice and thoughts as a person with an autistic brother, a person with an autism evaluation in a couple of days, and someone who has grown up with and struggled a lot with a lot of neurodivergent family members. ❤

  • @SJ-oo6km
    @SJ-oo6km Před 5 lety +2

    What wonderful parents. Truly heartbreaking for all involved.

  • @kaylapearl2332
    @kaylapearl2332 Před 5 lety +8

    What a sweet family. God bless them 💕

    • @hallowsalways4584
      @hallowsalways4584 Před 4 lety

      I know your heart might be in the right place but you have some nerve bringing “god” into this

  • @-3lory
    @-3lory Před 2 lety +1

    Bless you, for your courage and stamina and grace....amen

  • @SuperSunshinesue
    @SuperSunshinesue Před 5 lety +4

    Absolutely amazing parents. An incredible family. What a beautiful boy bearing an incredible load. You are his angels as well as his parents....I feel humbled by your example of what unconditional love is. May you be blessed always.

    • @Rippenhengst
      @Rippenhengst Před 4 lety

      His parents are the ones carrying the load. He doesn't have the mental capacities to recognize the consequences of his actions.

  • @geraldinecook7922
    @geraldinecook7922 Před 6 lety +3

    God bless you. You are loving parents .

  • @CD-vl5wr
    @CD-vl5wr Před 5 lety +2

    he reminds me of my 12 year old son he does not damage the wall and i hope he never does --keep up the good work with stevie

  • @frostfox1208
    @frostfox1208 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you for sharing your stories

  • @denni8884
    @denni8884 Před 9 měsíci

    Look how lovely Stephen is ❤ such a loving boy when he is okay, great music taste too. I’m so pleased his family have finally gotten the right support for their lovely boy.

  • @lucyortiz2009
    @lucyortiz2009 Před 2 lety +1

    Watched this video I cried like never how much we love our kids we wish we could give them the world no ,after how old they are this family is awesome go’s bless

  • @cheynestafford515
    @cheynestafford515 Před 5 lety +1

    How touching , my little boy was diagnosed with severe autism at the age of 3 , he just turned 6 ... I'm so glad I stumbled across this , as heartbreaking as it was to watch I felt so many similarities towards this beautiful family .. bless you and thankyou for sharing x

    • @MoUniqueMedia
      @MoUniqueMedia Před 5 lety

      We are in it together.. same here, my son was diagnosed at 3 with severe autism and he's 6 now..I have two other kids and I'm a single mom, divorced..dad's not around..it's truly a challenge..even though these docs make me emotional they also help me not feel alone 💙

  • @mwall8687
    @mwall8687 Před 5 lety +1

    My heart goes out to steven and his parents. I hope they are doing better

  • @Sarah.Riedel
    @Sarah.Riedel Před 4 lety +2

    I remember I had to go to A&E at the Waitakere Hospital after I turned my ankle on a hike...I was surprised that it was ostensibly an urban hospital albeit on the suburban outskirts of the city. I am not surprised they did not have the capacity to care for this young man with his needs.

  • @TheWorldisSoDivided
    @TheWorldisSoDivided Před 4 lety +2

    God Bless you guys! ❤️✌🏼

  • @nicolewooldridge9683
    @nicolewooldridge9683 Před 5 lety +2

    Oh boy how tough, I really hope things have, improved for you all. I have a 25 year old with High functioning Autism, on the spectrum but a different story. I totally agree, mental health issues occur, with main caregivers, carer fatigue, is a real issue. Good luck Stephen and Elliott.

  • @cherylsimmondsday9380
    @cherylsimmondsday9380 Před 4 lety +1

    Thank you!

  • @katharinecrumpton6314
    @katharinecrumpton6314 Před 4 lety +1

    Bless you. I understand what you have been through. Big hugs

  • @josetterobles7839
    @josetterobles7839 Před 3 lety

    Beautiful. It is sad our kids sometimes are looked at as monster for things, they are not responsible for. My son is 10 and does that now he breaks things gets mad. But not every day thank God. And I'm afraid sometimes for him but after seeing your story. In seeing Steven have his wings and be so independent that way it gives me hope. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @lisaoldwithsomanywhys5487

    God bless this family🙏 they have gone thru WAY too much