I spent 40 years with him. And he almost drove me to suicide. It took every single nerve in my body to walk away. Thanks to you Danish and many others for helping me see the light. We all are in this together ❤️
A brilliant example of this is in the classic b/w (1946?) film "Gaslight" with Ingrid Bergman and Charles Boyer, where the husband slowly and deliberately drives his wife close to insanity, as Danish describes here, with his incessant hypnotic accusations that she is mentally unstable. The final scene is a riveting counterattack by the victim when she finds the evidence he used against her in front of him. The film allows the viewer to witness how gaslighting unfolds in real time. It's truly diabolical!
@@saraliburd7752 yes, the story is set in the late 1900's when oil or gas lamps were used for lighting. This cast a great deal of dark shadow in the lit space hence the name .
I lived this, it’s true. I felt hypnotized or numbed. His constant distracting on purpose, put my brain on overload. Reflecting back, it is clearer the manipulative tactics he used…I am able to articulate my experience better. Thankful to be in the road to recovery. 🙏🏼 😞
Excellent movie. So is “suspicion” with Cary Grant. I know Hitchcock meant to give the movie a happy ending, but once I escaped my narc boyfriend I see the ending as her life of hell just beginning 😢
Just walked away from a five month long relationship with a narc but he also had sociopathic tendencies. My anxiety now left 🥹 I will heal and God answered my prayers to see it for what it was and to leave. Ask God to help you heal and to show you what you need to do! He has a life and plan For you ❤✝️✨
The malignant narcissist I divorced twists , demonizes, exploits, invalidates, weaponizes your positive good qualities and all of your emotions ,and feelings against you. You become a shell of the beautiful person you once were once he’s done abusing ,corrupting , and ruining your life by infecting your soul with his dark curse.
My father used to boast about how great of a father he is because of a child psychology course he took in college....while doing all these nasty things and assuring me I'm bipolar, insane, Yada yada....thanks Danish! This video helped 🙏
This is true. Exposure to toxicity is harmful and even lethal which is why it is vital to remove ourselves from the toxic people as soon as we discern that they are toxic. The effect the narcisists toxicity has on people is comparable to enetring a trans like hypnotic state which is narcisistic fog which traps and immobilizes the victim. Zero contact with toxicity of those individuals is the way to start healing. Thank you Danish.
For years, I didn’t know my sister was gaslighting and negative! I thought all these years she was not as intelligent/confused. Because, she ALWAYS had something ‘other’ to say about anything I was involved with. Until I learned about narcissism. Then EVERYTHING SHE HAS DONE OR SAID - made sense!! For example, she is always late for things, causing disruption. When I was in college and struggled with a class (failed it the first time - she said, “as. Black person, I wouldn’t fail.” or anything simple, she ALWAYS has a comment in a question form about it! It never caused me anxiety, because I thought she was just simple- now, I’m on to her!! She is ALWAYS BITING into one of her children. For years I would interrupt that conversation and say why are you bothering them…… 🙏🏾🙏🏾 DEMONIC!
"comment in a question form about it!" that way saying it in a question is not a statement. That was her way around lying. My partner would never tell me I haven't lied have I? Not, I never ly to you.
My mother could & would insult & hurt people's feelings at the drop of a hat. Biting her children Really expresses the concept. The stupider they are, there worse they can be. Especially family members & co-workers. People far too dangerous to try & educate.
Very informative video. I recognized a certain narcissist's use of confusion technique. Even had to admire the careful placement of suggestions. I don't know where this person picked these techniques up. These are powerful tools meant to be used responsibly for good. I hate seeing them used to hurt and control vulnerable people. So glad to see you providing information and warnings.
The telling me I'm crazy usually pisses me off. Them telling others that I'm crazy, and these "friends" believing him enrages me. I'm not sure there is one minute during the day that I'm not, upset, mad, depressed, or anxious, because of all the negative scenarios that they have caused running through my head 24/7/365.
Say to yourself "anyone who believes his garbage is stupid enough to be led around by a lowlife " and is not worth my time. Make sure to be calm and say as much to ANY flying monkeys be sure to give them a knowing smile as you walk away. And if you want to casually say "you can learn the hard way if you want".
@@jbrown2908 Bingo! Your comment is a perfect example at this topic.Narcs always tell you how you feel, they always tell you: You need help and are commanding. Obvious narc projections. I knew it!
Crazy!! Exactly what he & his monkey's called me...Then had a "forensic psychiatrist" label me as the dangerous narc! 💞💞💞Be Safe Everyone!!💞💞💞 ❤️Your work Danish & your 😺!!
Finally I understand why I have been unable to find myself, why I haven't been able to think straight, why I think he's wonderful when I know deep inside and I don't even really have to go that deeply to know he isn't. I have been hypnotized, traumatized and made to play a fool thank you for helping me see clearly
I recognized this behaviour now that you are talking about it, i feel so sorry for myself and what i got from him, this is such a terrible thing to do to a human being (his wife!)
Perfection in this analysis! We know our own reality! A good ploy is to deny a benign conversation took place to shake it up, again you know what reality is, of how the ebb and flow of life transpires. Moving, taking, rearranging items is another way of gaslighting, your stuff is your stuff. If you were as incompetent as they insist you are, then how do you make it in life at all? You would not, that IS why you ARE competent! And walk a life path of truth.
My roommate does stupid things like this I've talked to her about gaslighting before, but she just can't control it. I don't pay her much attention anymore
Mr Danish, Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU, for this episode. I think of all the many episodes I've listened to of yours, this one hit home w me the most, & for the first time I cried. (Dated narcissist 6 mos, last year.) Even after 6 mos of being broken up, I still feel that hypnotic draw; I've not seen/talked to him, yet every now & then I've let myself text him. How can I get myself to block texting? He used my anxiety also, as you said here~mind-bending assessments that I'd not heard the same way, from men before. And I still feel my personality questioning many of my thought/decisions, in a way that I'd not really done before. I'm saving this video also; your explanation was so good to hear!
your videos are fantastic. they are so fantastic, and you word things so meaningfully... I could just cry. not a painful cry, a see the light type of cry.. thank you so much
Insightful Shifting your reality Feeling as you live in a thriller movie Proposing you an alternative reality You stop to believe yourself You constantly examining yourself instead of examining his behaviour.
Hi Danish, we want a video about what's the boundary line between healthy criticism and overtly critical, because initially we tend to absorb it as a part of parenting even relatives misguide us to not to satao a parent
First and foremost, learn to trust your own senses and your own judgement. Your perception of reality is real and unique in its own way. Accept it. That way, you will be harder to gaslight. Also, whenever they try to gaslight you, remind to yourself: "it´s not about me". The society keeps teaching people about taking care for others, but nobody ever does teach you, how to care for yourself. That´s why we seek validation outside, instead of inside. We are the validators of our own experience. After all, the way, we sense the world, which might be considered as "unique" by the outside world, is normal for us. Validate your own experience and your own senses. As a result, you will also feel more confident in your own abilities. A partner (or a colleague, even a parent) doubting your abilities is often first red flag of a toxic relationship. Partnership is not about one partner always supporting the other, but both partners supporting each other.
Looking back in My life I can see what happened thanks 😊 for making sense of what's going on now healing be aware and pay attention to what people are saying in new friendships thanks 😊 very much very helpful 💖🦋🍀🙏😊
Thank you so much, your videos have really helped me get back in touch with me. And more importantly to understand the signs, keep up the good work!!!!
I have a love/hate relationship with this because the same things victims of narc abuse say is what narcissists say when they are trying to convince you you're the problem. For example in my relationship my S.O. would have crazy reactions. Like starting a fight over me asking for a second turn in the only bathroom we had. When I would say that they were overreacting they used these exact talking points to try to convince me I was a narcissist for pointing out the behavior. If I ever called out any behavior they painted that as me gaslighting and trying to make them think they were worse than they are.
ASSALAMUALAIKUM MY BROTHER THANKS Danish for opening my eyes through your knowledge.. I WISH AND PRAY ALLAH TO REWARD U HERE IN THIS WORLD AND IN AKHIRAH..
Oh dear!! They also tape you on a spare phone they set up... Thank you for your reassuring comments.. Me...I think many are demon possessed.. May God Almighty help any and all...
I am a man, in whose workplace, a male overt narcissist tried to allure him with prosperity in his job. But that he found that I would not be allured, he intimidated me and gaslighted me, and also, he insulted me, calling me "characterless bastard". And three years after that, I avenged him by writing to him an e-mail that he is a transman, for the reason that he is childless, and I sent a carbon copy of that mail to almost all in my office. But now, all those, whose boss he was, are trauma bonded.
Its terrifying when own mother uses this, My narcissist mother uses this on me... And she has also made other people think that way about me that Im crazy etc (and also those flying monkeys who are always her loyal supporters believe her and repeat this narcissist's message that Im The crazy person,of course it is their flying monkeys job also)... My mother knows that I know how evil,manipulative person she is so..😕
Danish, I tried telling my brother that I had gone through a narcissistic relationship and I've got c-PTSD because of it. He said who told you that, I told him that I've been researching this and now I know this after a long time, he said what if the internet said that I am going to die in 2 days because I am fat, will I die? This has always been the ignorant behavior my family had approached. They always try to justify certain things, whether it is success or darkness in life. Danish, I want you to respond to this pls.
@@jbrown2908 You are right but the reason behind telling them was that I was trying to make them understand why am I struggling so much at everything so that they will be able to understand instead of yelling at me all the time.
@@jbrown2908 Thank you for this reply, I was just losing hope to live and I saw this. And yes my trauma is just getting worse day by day, I have even lost the sense of self and I have to remind myself time to time that this is ME not SOMEONE ELSE.
I had a experience similar to saint issac of kiev caves Dealing with some people after seeing the grey gargoyle looking being with little horns things just kept happening. Still. I'm not crazy, whatever he met is at work in some people. Some other demons too.
I reject intellegence of nrcs Its like tief is smart They've just specialized their craft. I saw everything from beginning, monster tried to persueded, but without result
Danish do a video on how they treat their permanent supply and other supply and if a person is making babies with the permanent supply and not us means they r making babies with first wives not us what's the reason behind that?
Here is the link to all my best resources:
beacons.ai/narcabusecoach/
If a narcissist seen this video how they will react it. If they have realised or questioned themselves like am a narcissist? Like that
Kitty awe!!!!🎉❤
They also convince you you are worthless, and can’t do anything right.
I spent 40 years with him. And he almost drove me to suicide. It took every single nerve in my body to walk away. Thanks to you Danish and many others for helping me see the light. We all are in this together ❤️
A brilliant example of this is in the classic b/w (1946?) film "Gaslight" with Ingrid Bergman and Charles Boyer, where the husband slowly and deliberately drives his wife close to insanity, as Danish describes here, with his incessant hypnotic accusations that she is mentally unstable. The final scene is a riveting counterattack by the victim when she finds the evidence he used against her in front of him. The film allows the viewer to witness how gaslighting unfolds in real time. It's truly diabolical!
It is. It's a very good movie, too.
That’s where the term gaslighting comes from
@@saraliburd7752 yes, the story is set in the late 1900's when oil or gas lamps were used for lighting. This cast a great deal of dark shadow in the lit space hence the name .
I lived this, it’s true. I felt hypnotized or numbed. His constant distracting on purpose, put my brain on overload. Reflecting back, it is clearer the manipulative tactics he used…I am able to articulate my experience better. Thankful to be in the road to recovery. 🙏🏼 😞
Excellent movie. So is “suspicion” with Cary Grant. I know Hitchcock meant to give the movie a happy ending, but once I escaped my narc boyfriend I see the ending as her life of hell just beginning 😢
Just walked away from a five month long relationship with a narc but he also had sociopathic tendencies. My anxiety now left 🥹 I will heal and God answered my prayers to see it for what it was and to leave. Ask God to help you heal and to show you what you need to do! He has a life and plan
For you ❤✝️✨
The malignant narcissist I divorced twists , demonizes, exploits, invalidates, weaponizes your positive good qualities and all of your emotions ,and feelings against you.
You become a shell of the beautiful person you once were once he’s done abusing ,corrupting , and ruining your life by infecting your soul with his dark curse.
My father used to boast about how great of a father he is because of a child psychology course he took in college....while doing all these nasty things and assuring me I'm bipolar, insane, Yada yada....thanks Danish! This video helped 🙏
These people say and do insane things
Tell him you took an online parenting course, and he's a #$%^@! dad ;)
My narc of a dad is what got me here in the first place...
@@ambaro0887 hahaha oh man I wish I'd thought of that at the time 😅
These people only use psychology as a tool to help them get to you
This is true. Exposure to toxicity is harmful and even lethal which is why it is vital to remove ourselves from the toxic people as soon as we discern that they are toxic. The effect the narcisists toxicity has on people is comparable to enetring a trans like hypnotic state which is narcisistic fog which traps and immobilizes the victim. Zero contact with toxicity of those individuals is the way to start healing. Thank you Danish.
For years, I didn’t know my sister was gaslighting and negative! I thought all these years she was not as intelligent/confused. Because, she ALWAYS had something ‘other’ to say about anything I was involved with. Until I learned about narcissism. Then EVERYTHING SHE HAS DONE OR SAID - made sense!!
For example, she is always late for things, causing disruption. When I was in college and struggled with a class (failed it the first time - she said, “as. Black person, I wouldn’t fail.” or anything simple, she ALWAYS has a comment in a question form about it! It never caused me anxiety, because I thought she was just simple- now, I’m on to her!! She is ALWAYS BITING into one of her children. For years I would interrupt that conversation and say why are you bothering them…… 🙏🏾🙏🏾 DEMONIC!
"comment in a question form about it!" that way saying it in a question is not a statement. That was her way around lying. My partner would never tell me I haven't lied have I? Not, I never ly to you.
I'm convinced there's some real memory loss there after 30 years
My mother could & would insult & hurt people's feelings at the drop of a hat. Biting her children Really expresses the concept. The stupider they are, there worse they can be. Especially family members & co-workers. People far too dangerous to try & educate.
Makes me really appreciate serenity & pleasant times.
Very informative video. I recognized a certain narcissist's use of confusion technique. Even had to admire the careful placement of suggestions. I don't know where this person picked these techniques up. These are powerful tools meant to be used responsibly for good. I hate seeing them used to hurt and control vulnerable people. So glad to see you providing information and warnings.
The telling me I'm crazy usually pisses me off. Them telling others that I'm crazy, and these "friends" believing him enrages me. I'm not sure there is one minute during the day that I'm not, upset, mad, depressed, or anxious, because of all the negative scenarios that they have caused running through my head 24/7/365.
Say to yourself "anyone who believes his garbage is stupid enough to be led around by a lowlife " and is not worth my time. Make sure to be calm and say as much to ANY flying monkeys be sure to give them a knowing smile as you walk away. And if you want to casually say "you can learn the hard way if you want".
@@jbrown2908 This is where I am. Thank-you for the understanding.
@@jbrown2908 Bingo! Your comment is a perfect example at this topic.Narcs always tell you how you feel, they always tell you: You need help and are commanding. Obvious narc projections. I knew it!
@@jbrown2908 you deleted your 'comments'....
I just pray and read psalms it helps❤
Crazy!! Exactly what he & his monkey's called me...Then had a "forensic psychiatrist" label me as the dangerous narc! 💞💞💞Be Safe Everyone!!💞💞💞
❤️Your work Danish & your 😺!!
You are a gem Danish; and your cat is adorable.
Thanks 💚
Finally I understand why I have been unable to find myself, why I haven't been able to think straight, why I think he's wonderful when I know deep inside and I don't even really have to go that deeply to know he isn't. I have been hypnotized, traumatized and made to play a fool thank you for helping me see clearly
I recognized this behaviour now that you are talking about it, i feel so sorry for myself and what i got from him, this is such a terrible thing to do to a human being (his wife!)
Thank you. My father performed every act that you mentioned
They always do 💚
Thank you Danish. I appreciate your knowledge and ability to make all this make sense.
Mind bending through reality bending.
Indeed 💚
@@narcabusecoach thanks for making this content.
Perfection in this analysis! We know our own reality! A good ploy is to deny a benign conversation took place to shake it up, again you know what reality is, of how the ebb and flow of life transpires.
Moving, taking, rearranging items is another way of gaslighting, your stuff is your stuff. If you were as incompetent as they insist you are, then how do you make it in life at all? You would not, that IS why you ARE competent! And walk a life path of truth.
I can't thank you enough, Danish, for your videos they help me tremendously.
I am grateful to know that I was able to help
thank you again Danish 🙏🏼. you know your stuff 👍🏼and are helping us through a very dark place 👍🏼
I am glad to know that I was able to help
Thank u danish for all the efforts and help ur giving to humanity
💚💚
My roommate does stupid things like this
I've talked to her about gaslighting before, but she just can't control it. I don't pay her much attention anymore
Exactly what i’ve had - still get
NEVER EVER LEAVE YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY
Lovely cat 😺🐾
Hi Danish. I'm Maca (maa-tza). Your channel helps me and my heart goes out to you and everyone coming out of a narcissist family. ✨️🕊🙏💝
Hypnotic trance. I have thought about this too. This is the first time I ever heard anyone say this.
Mr Danish, Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU, for this episode. I think of all the many episodes I've listened to of yours, this one hit home w me the most, & for the first time I cried. (Dated narcissist 6 mos, last year.) Even after 6 mos of being broken up, I still feel that hypnotic draw; I've not seen/talked to him, yet every now & then I've let myself text him. How can I get myself to block texting? He used my anxiety also, as you said here~mind-bending assessments that I'd not heard the same way, from men before. And I still feel my personality questioning many of my thought/decisions, in a way that I'd not really done before. I'm saving this video also; your explanation was so good to hear!
Agree it’s the most devastating type of abuse.
It should be punishable by jail time.
Thank you. Good insight for all survivors, wish I'd known earlier 🤷
Thank you
your videos are fantastic. they are so fantastic, and you word things so meaningfully... I could just cry. not a painful cry, a see the light type of cry.. thank you so much
Insightful
Shifting your reality
Feeling as you live in a thriller movie
Proposing you an alternative reality
You stop to believe yourself
You constantly examining yourself instead of examining his behaviour.
Hi Danish, we want a video about what's the boundary line between healthy criticism and overtly critical, because initially we tend to absorb it as a part of parenting even relatives misguide us to not to satao a parent
Mine made me believe that all the problems were my fault.
Violence witout a gun, contributes to human trafficking
In a 'nutshell=insanity and Evil!" I've been out of Nat shop for about a year now! Dangerous to say the least!💜🙏❤️🙏
Yr cool. You explain their games and abuse so well.. Thankyou
Spot On Danish!! love your vids!!
Wow this is so accurate. It happened to me too. I still doubt myself. It's a hard road to recovery.
mind bending is a much nicer term that what my rage has inspired me to use. "mind F#*king". rough stuff to get through.
My ex used to say, “Not everyone thinks like you.” I really thought there was something wrong me.
First and foremost, learn to trust your own senses and your own judgement. Your perception of reality is real and unique in its own way. Accept it. That way, you will be harder to gaslight. Also, whenever they try to gaslight you, remind to yourself: "it´s not about me".
The society keeps teaching people about taking care for others, but nobody ever does teach you, how to care for yourself. That´s why we seek validation outside, instead of inside. We are the validators of our own experience. After all, the way, we sense the world, which might be considered as "unique" by the outside world, is normal for us.
Validate your own experience and your own senses. As a result, you will also feel more confident in your own abilities. A partner (or a colleague, even a parent) doubting your abilities is often first red flag of a toxic relationship. Partnership is not about one partner always supporting the other, but both partners supporting each other.
That’s interesting that the comments said to a person in confusion could stick to them similar to hypnosis in a way.
Looking back in My life I can see what happened thanks 😊 for making sense of what's going on now healing be aware and pay attention to what people are saying in new friendships thanks 😊 very much very helpful 💖🦋🍀🙏😊
So good! Thank you so much!
Thank you for this video, 💯 correct!
Your statement is correct 🌻🙏
one of the most helpfull episodes
100% correct 👍
Thank you 💜
Very sincere genuine and very enlightening content
Thank you so much, your videos have really helped me get back in touch with me. And more importantly to understand the signs, keep up the good work!!!!
Fantastic cat!
Yup, my narc ex studied hypnotism but I thought he was doing it to help me.
JazakAllah
I have a love/hate relationship with this because the same things victims of narc abuse say is what narcissists say when they are trying to convince you you're the problem. For example in my relationship my S.O. would have crazy reactions. Like starting a fight over me asking for a second turn in the only bathroom we had. When I would say that they were overreacting they used these exact talking points to try to convince me I was a narcissist for pointing out the behavior. If I ever called out any behavior they painted that as me gaslighting and trying to make them think they were worse than they are.
ASSALAMUALAIKUM MY BROTHER
THANKS Danish for opening my eyes through your knowledge.. I WISH AND PRAY ALLAH TO REWARD U HERE IN THIS WORLD AND IN AKHIRAH..
Why are so many people against acknowledging this 'personality disorder?'
Nice cat gaslighting you in the background! My late husband was definitely narcissistic, your insights are very helpful in my healing.
Oh dear!!
They also tape you on a spare phone they set up...
Thank you for your reassuring comments..
Me...I think many are demon possessed..
May God Almighty help any and all...
I caught mine recording me and setting me up..then told us we didn’t see what we saw….. diabolical demons
Victims of this abuse also make tapes to validate their own version of reality when faced with constant gaslighting
I am a man, in whose workplace, a male overt narcissist tried to allure him with prosperity in his job. But that he found that I would not be allured, he intimidated me and gaslighted me, and also, he insulted me, calling me "characterless bastard". And three years after that, I avenged him by writing to him an e-mail that he is a transman, for the reason that he is childless, and I sent a carbon copy of that mail to almost all in my office. But now, all those, whose boss he was, are trauma bonded.
I was not finacially good enough to leavr.when i could i flew. I didnt care anymore and he kept on with revenge
Mine did not want to touch me. He ignored. I'm weak.
Somebody is Daddy's supporter. 👏💯🎯✔️🥰💓
I just want to hold your cat. He reminds me of the cat my ex took from me.
I ended up on antipsychotics this way...... Truly
Thanks
🥰 you have 2 fluffy cats !
Its terrifying when own mother uses this, My narcissist mother uses this on me... And she has also made other people think that way about me that Im crazy etc (and also those flying monkeys who are always her loyal supporters believe her and repeat this narcissist's message that Im The crazy person,of course it is their flying monkeys job also)... My mother knows that I know how evil,manipulative person she is so..😕
Hi kitty 🐈😀
And Also do a Video About What is Final Discard By A Narcissist Looks Like 👍
Danish, I tried telling my brother that I had gone through a narcissistic relationship and I've got c-PTSD because of it. He said who told you that, I told him that I've been researching this and now I know this after a long time, he said what if the internet said that I am going to die in 2 days because I am fat, will I die?
This has always been the ignorant behavior my family had approached. They always try to justify certain things, whether it is success or darkness in life.
Danish, I want you to respond to this pls.
@@jbrown2908 You are right but the reason behind telling them was that I was trying to make them understand why am I struggling so much at everything so that they will be able to understand instead of yelling at me all the time.
@@jbrown2908 That's correct. Thank you for your suggestion.
@@jbrown2908 Thank you for this reply, I was just losing hope to live and I saw this. And yes my trauma is just getting worse day by day, I have even lost the sense of self and I have to remind myself time to time that this is ME not SOMEONE ELSE.
Lol i told him the othe day QUIT calling girls Crazy WE DONT CARE! Lol he said thats funny you are crazy 😂
I like your cat Danish
Who is the pretty kitty in the background? 😻😻😻
I had a experience similar to saint issac of kiev caves
Dealing with some people after seeing the grey gargoyle looking being with little horns things just kept happening.
Still.
I'm not crazy, whatever he met is at work in some people.
Some other demons too.
Can I take one appointment,pls,it's. Very urgent,pls help me
👍🏻🙏🏻
Is it possible to recover from this type of brain hypnotic transe
✨🙏✨
AND ALL OF THIS BCS OF MONEY
I reject intellegence of nrcs
Its like tief is smart
They've just specialized their craft.
I saw everything from beginning, monster tried to persueded, but without result
👍
Danish do a video on how they treat their permanent supply and other supply and if a person is making babies with the permanent supply and not us means they r making babies with first wives not us what's the reason behind that?
@@jbrown2908 what you mean by that? I'm asking for a Reason not asking if they can obviously they can if they can with their first wives
@@jbrown2908 where have I wrote this show me my question is completely different and ur answer is illogical so bye
@@jbrown2908 Your answer is bs! Think about that.
To manipulate, being in controle and to 'shine'.
😽💞
Thank you