How to Cope When Everything's Awful and You're Not Okay

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  • čas přidán 22. 02. 2017
  • Sometimes everything is awful and you’re not okay. That’s okay. Here’s how to cope. A self-care checklist. The one I go through here designed by Eponis Sinope to help battle depression, but I encourage you to add to it or create your own!
    This is the full version for the ADHD tribe, check out the short, shareable, checklist-only version here: • How to Self Care: The ...
    And check out the original tumblr post by Eponis Sinope here: eponis.tumblr.com/post/1137980...
    Facebook: / howtoadhd
    Twitter: / howtoadhd
    Support us on Patreon: / howtoadhd
    Special thanks to Daniel Alfaro for shooting/directing me practicing self care!
    "The Show Must Be Go,” "Sock Hop"
    Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
    Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
    creativecommons.org/licenses/b...

Komentáře • 1,2K

  • @HowtoADHD
    @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +515

    In case you're wondering why I uploaded two vids, it's to make it easier to share with non-ADHDers or come back to if you just want to get straight to the checklist :) Here's the short version: czcams.com/video/Ek-B_EZyoM8/video.html

    • @mm57390
      @mm57390 Před 7 lety +16

      thank you sooooooo much and wow your channel grew I remember when you only had like 300 subscribers wow keep up the good work 😁😁

    • @wesfreneaux9728
      @wesfreneaux9728 Před 7 lety +2

      How to ADHD Would EDM be easier for people w/ ADHD to pay attention to or listen to?

    • @thenotsospecialone4609
      @thenotsospecialone4609 Před 7 lety +9

      How to ADHD a lot of your videos are really relatable to me. I'm 16 and have often struggled with the symptoms of adhd but not even known about them untill I did some research cause I was curious but I haven't been diagnosed professionally and I don't know how to talk to my parents about it because they will probably think I'm overreacting and being stupid.

    • @rubyflamewing4205
      @rubyflamewing4205 Před 7 lety +4

      How to ADHD can you plz do a video on how to focus with ADHD and without medicine because I have been diagnosed with ADD but was not given medicine to help and can't ever focus unless I am moving around and a lot of times it takes control of me and my ADD, anxiety, and ocular migraines take over. so I'm really hoping to take my suggestion on doing How to focus without medicine with ADHD

    • @daniellavoie1060
      @daniellavoie1060 Před 7 lety +1

      How to ADHD this video really helped. I have been overall struggling with a lot for so long. I have recently lost a huge amount of friends, school has been hard on me, and I've just been feeling horrible for a while.

  • @iLuvNeiL7
    @iLuvNeiL7 Před 7 lety +3007

    I can't wait to have this checklist everywhere and ignore it.

    • @julianc3701
      @julianc3701 Před 6 lety +163

      Hahahah...so relatable it's sad

    • @rushardedward
      @rushardedward Před 6 lety +83

      Omg 😂 so true it hurts

    • @caffeinato
      @caffeinato Před 5 lety +167

      Haha, like leaving reminders to do things, but they seem to just blend into the scenery and get filtered out like it's some kind of background noise.

    • @olivevintage8622
      @olivevintage8622 Před 5 lety +11

      Truth

    • @gme2666
      @gme2666 Před 5 lety +24

      HAAAAA!!!! so true.. but you are TRYING

  • @Jessica-cx5bi
    @Jessica-cx5bi Před 6 lety +950

    So I’m not the only person who lays on the sofa trying to motivate myself to start working on my superhuman to do list on my off days? Thank you.

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 6 lety +107

      Nope.

    • @dariopavlovic8640
      @dariopavlovic8640 Před 3 lety +23

      You wouldn’t believe how many of these I have had.

    • @MegaKhelditia
      @MegaKhelditia Před 3 lety +19

      You described how I went thru middle school, every morning, before going to the bus stop. I thought it was meditating for a long time. Maybe some of it ended up becoming that?

    • @anacastro5283
      @anacastro5283 Před 3 lety +27

      My mom always had cleaning day on saturdays so she could rest on sundays before going to work.
      I figured out I need the oposite. I will spend saturday playing video games or another engaging activity i like, and mentally prepare myself the whole day so that I can clean the house the next day ^^'' I need a full day of regrouping. To do something that takes about 2-3h max xD

    • @Dancestar1981
      @Dancestar1981 Před 3 lety +5

      So relatable

  • @Cassiekalyn
    @Cassiekalyn Před 7 lety +700

    I'm laying in bed crying because I've tried talking to my parents about ADHD for the past few years. I know I have it (it's fairly obvious to me anyone around me). I'm in college now, and life is much more difficult to handle. I wish I had support to get through and seek help.

    • @adhya3114
      @adhya3114 Před 4 lety +30

      I know I'm late, but hang in there! I'll have your back! Sending a virtual hug ❤

    • @shahdalali7999
      @shahdalali7999 Před 3 lety +35

      Omg, I feel you, I FEEL YOUU! I am going through this rn, and going to college is what will save my life actually, I will have freedom and I will go to a therapist myself

    • @shahdalali7999
      @shahdalali7999 Před 3 lety +6

      Will Fryer 2 She wouldn’t know for sure, however she would suspect it,

    • @carlscarl263
      @carlscarl263 Před 3 lety +7

      Lol I'm literally getting served "go away" papers everytime I ask for help. " Idk fill this out then come back" I never fill them out

    • @krishanamurti2297
      @krishanamurti2297 Před 3 lety +1

      U r a brave beautiful soul..just don't give up...u will be better after college and trust me u ll sail thru..sorry for late post..just wanted to show support

  • @keiraeditsstuff
    @keiraeditsstuff Před 3 lety +130

    When I feel alone I watch this channel . It's so inspiring to a girl who is the only one in the family with ADHD

  • @bentevane9218
    @bentevane9218 Před 7 lety +577

    Please make a video about overthinking :)

    • @papafizzz
      @papafizzz Před 7 lety +9

      Creative B yess please

    • @papafizzz
      @papafizzz Před 7 lety +28

      Creative B especially in relation to work load and friendships/relationships

    • @halfblindchaos2506
      @halfblindchaos2506 Před 7 lety +68

      Not just overthinking but over analyzing things as well.

    • @odoloid
      @odoloid Před 7 lety +20

      SECONDED.
      I overthink stuff all the time.

    • @jcbartoni9498
      @jcbartoni9498 Před 6 lety +1

      that's a great idea☺

  • @colleenkeating1067
    @colleenkeating1067 Před 7 lety +157

    I had a bad ADHD day too. My class was so energetic today, and even though I respond well to stimulation, this was too much. People were running around, talking, and making so many noises that my head started to spin. Everyone else was fine, but because of the ADHD I was hearing everything at once while I was trying to work and it made me want to cry.

    • @dj0naturalvibes
      @dj0naturalvibes Před 7 lety +10

      Colleen Keating omg when I don't take my meds that's how my head is all the time

    • @VerosumaticChromosphere
      @VerosumaticChromosphere Před 2 lety +5

      This is how I feel everytime I'm in a busy public place.

    • @SiddhiChaukate
      @SiddhiChaukate Před 7 měsíci +1

      Currently I am feeling this everyday everyone in the class is so cheerful and that noise really makes me so overstimulated it's just too much too handle

  • @bipolartorecovery1485
    @bipolartorecovery1485 Před 7 lety +165

    i just thought i would share the happy news that I'm now wearing jeans for the 3rd time in 6 months ☺. i have unrelated pain issues so i normally have to wear dresses or skirts. yesterday was one of the worst pain days ever and i got through it with my cat being really sweet cuddling next to me and letting myself nap alot. i was surprised today to wake up feeling ok and i put on my new jeans in my new size i haven't been in for 5 years. remember, just because it's tough now, doesn't mean tomorrow isn't a new day and who knows? you might finally be able to wear those new jeans after all

  • @elyneal9157
    @elyneal9157 Před 7 lety +253

    Today the ADHD WON I've been I've been trying extra hard to maintain focus and all these other things because it really takes a toll on my mom. Today I just couldint quite keep focused, I kept undermining my teachers orders and I continued to just mess up.

    • @robertsilvestro8446
      @robertsilvestro8446 Před 5 lety +20

      Edog Neal I know this a year too late but your hearts in the right place. The fact that your worried about your mother and teachers is great self awareness. I'm still struggling with that. I hope the past year has been positive for you.

  • @jediknightanon
    @jediknightanon Před 7 lety +288

    I cannot believe I am JUST discovering this channel! Thank you for everything you do. This is perfect. I wish I had a friend like you.

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +66

      +Christian Villegas you do now :) hi new brain, welcome to the tribe!

    • @alwaysforanimals
      @alwaysforanimals Před 2 lety +10

      My thoughts exactly! But 4 years after you discovered this channel!

    • @maribellasocrie
      @maribellasocrie Před rokem +1

      @@alwaysforanimals hello from 2022 ADHD still exists

  • @ainsleymason852
    @ainsleymason852 Před 7 lety +141

    When I try to accomplish something but my brain says "no," I make like the US government and shut down and I can't do anything. It can take hours for this to pass which is not exactly acceptable at school. How can I deal with this?

    • @nunyabusiness42069
      @nunyabusiness42069 Před 4 lety +30

      I know it's been three years but if you're still struggling with this, I found the culprit for me was anxiety and fear of failure. Every time I catch myself beating myself up, I gently correct it because I'm okay and my value isnt tied to my work/performance/etc and that it's okay to not be working constantly. At first it felt very hollow and fake and wrong but over time that shutdown panic has been happening less and less. It sucks when it happens at school, you could feign working, sometimes I would just scribble nonsense lines in a notebook instead of take notes because i felt anxious.

    • @nonyabidness5708
      @nonyabidness5708 Před 3 lety +10

      @@nunyabusiness42069 Hey cuz! Good advice.
      The other advice I'd give is, walk away. Just for say, five minutes. And walk up several flights of stairs and around a few hallways. I've found that getting a short burst or exercise (works best if I really get that heart rate going) helps me focus when I get back to my desk.

    • @Dancestar1981
      @Dancestar1981 Před 3 lety +2

      @@nunyabusiness42069 god yes fear of failure is crippling

  • @JP-tg6lr
    @JP-tg6lr Před rokem +7

    It’s been 5 years since you up loaded this video…. Yesterday was the hardest day of my life. I made it through somehow. Today started off the same way. I was desperate for help and found this video in my recommended section. I usually gripe about the algorithm but today, with the help of the algorithm gods, you might have saved my life. Thanks for being a content creator. I can imagine sometimes it’s hard to do but there’s a much deeper reward than the money. On behalf of myself, my wife, and my 3 young boys, thank you so much!

  • @rachelsaunders7746
    @rachelsaunders7746 Před 6 lety +21

    One of my go to things to do when I feel rotten is to try to do something nice for someone, without getting caught, and then be there when they discover it. But the biggest part is to not get caught. They can't know who their secret helper/gift giver is.

  • @alinageorge2681
    @alinageorge2681 Před 2 lety +11

    Today I’m having my first mental health day, and I’m so guilt-ridden about taking time off work (I’m an ambulance driver, we’re short-staffed, and Omicron has just come to our country) that I came back to this video to help me. Hopefully I feel better after I finish the checklist!

  • @EvelynaGR
    @EvelynaGR Před 7 lety +116

    I can't follow the advice with the electronic device on my bed, I am watching your video!

    • @DrakeSilmore
      @DrakeSilmore Před 5 lety +6

      My bed... But that's where my laptop lives...

    • @Speed001
      @Speed001 Před 4 lety +2

      I like to listen to ASMR as I fall asleep, but with the screen facing down so no light. Eyes are closed.

  • @GameofKnowing
    @GameofKnowing Před 7 lety +141

    Holy guacamole, this is a good channel. Wow. I feel like I'm echoing a lot of other commenters here, but it feels pretty incredible to have the problems that I've been fighting with for years legitimized and demystified one by one as I watch your videos. I was diagnosed with ADD almost 10 years ago, and I had no idea that resources like these existed. Thank you so much.

  • @Ryy22
    @Ryy22 Před 7 lety +66

    I love seeing people who share the same type of witty quirky humor I do. Sending you much love from the Netherlands!

  • @lomaroll8787
    @lomaroll8787 Před 6 lety +7

    Just got diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type after I met a therapist because I was suffering from depression. so I had to look up how it was for other people to have ADHD and I now understand what I have been living for the past 29 years of my life. Your videos are great and helped me a lot through this :) keep up the great work, looking forward for more.

  • @lysa2756
    @lysa2756 Před 11 měsíci +3

    I had a very tough day socially talking. I had a conflict in my dance class because of my impulsiveness and talkative nature. I felt so bad because I've always struggled with social situations feeling like I don't fit in that everyone rejecting me left me in tears for hours. I feel safe when I watched this channel and this video really helped, thanks Jessica!

  • @particalman1016
    @particalman1016 Před 3 lety +4

    I had no idea how much I needed this channel in my life, been dealing with ADHD and Depression for a while now, it wasn't until my therapist recommended you to me, and I a so thankful she did.

  • @sanfran91
    @sanfran91 Před 3 lety +8

    Have you hugged a living being the past 2 days? *cries in corona*

  • @RairakkuMushi
    @RairakkuMushi Před 7 lety +23

    I am so glad this channel exists. I JUST found out I was diagnoised as a kid but after the first initial treatments in school, my brothers ODD meant I got a little bit ignored. I was doing OK and he was causing chaos, so yeah. Now I'm 35 and realizing my failure to adult properly isn't a failure at all. Attempting to use the things I've learned this week to get my life under control, while I wait to be able to see my Doctor and get stuff set up... these videos are helping so much. Little cheerful reminders that I'm not alone and yeah this is Hard but that's OK. Had a rough evening and morning asnd well, it's time to shower, get dressed and do a thing. Like make that Doctors appointment.

  • @elisenieuwe4649
    @elisenieuwe4649 Před 7 lety +24

    I would like to share something that helps me.
    Allowing myself to just sit on the couch/on my bed for a while and feel the emotions that I half suppress.(usually unconsious) Often giving myself the chance to consiously experience my emotions, sadness, anger and fear, helps me to lessen them. It's like they need to be validated once in a while.

    • @colleenshelton9972
      @colleenshelton9972 Před 7 lety +4

      I agree Elise. ADHD is hard and we need to allow our selves some emotional breaks. I'm in my senior year of college online (apparently I really hate myself to put myself through such torture, and I'm in my 40's). Anyway, I took a break from my big paper that is due soon and just cried. From what I understand, we release hormones when we cry (literally through our tears) and although writing the paper is still difficult, I felt better after I "let it out." Thanks for sharing.

  • @sirenofsound
    @sirenofsound Před 7 lety +88

    I like the Abraham-Hicks Emotional Guidance Scale. When you're feeling blue, look at the scale and see if you can reach for the next emotion up. Then the next one, and so on until you get to #1. It goes like this:
    1. Joy/appreciation/empowered/freedom/love
    2. passion
    3. enthusiasm/eagerness/happiness
    4. positive expectation/belief
    5. optimism
    6. hopefulness
    7. contentment
    8. boredom
    9. pessimism
    10. frustration/irritation/impatience
    11. overwhelm
    12. disappointment
    13. doubt
    14. worry
    15. blame
    16. discouragement
    17. anger
    18. revenge
    19. hated/rage
    20. jealousy
    21. insecurity/guilt/unworthiness
    22. fear/grief/depression/despair/powerlessness
    Start at whatever yucky state you feel and reach for the next rung up. When you achieve that state, get the next rung up. The whole process takes about 5 minutes! really! And there are printable versions online so you can print it out and put it in a frame on your desk, a small one in your wallet, a page in your planner, etc. wherever you think you'll need it someday and know you can reach for it any time.

    • @AUnicorn666
      @AUnicorn666 Před 6 lety

      M start at where you are currently

    • @nimporte7722
      @nimporte7722 Před 6 lety +10

      What if you feel approximatively everything at the same time ? >

    • @kristinaparaschos7169
      @kristinaparaschos7169 Před 6 lety +7

      wait, so if I am at 22, i should seek insecurity, guilt and unworthiness? hmmmmm

    • @chickenfeed3
      @chickenfeed3 Před 6 lety +3

      Kristina Paraschos It's better than #22.

    • @mars3580
      @mars3580 Před 5 lety +5

      Kristina Paraschos It can help to reach for something in the same region, that might be a little better/healthy for you.
      When you try to go to fast, sometimes your brain resists and you start at square one. Or you might try to reach for that good one before you're ready, which could make you feel even worse when you can't get it quite yet.
      Sure, unworthiness isn't healthy. But, it's healthier than other options.

  • @mintbrownieangelfish-6114

    One thing that's really helped me on bad days is that on a good day I wrote a letter to myself. You know yourself better than anyone, you know what type of things will make you feel bad. And on a good day you'll have the positive outlook that your 'not okay' self needs.

  • @Schmeephilis13
    @Schmeephilis13 Před 4 lety +2

    I've gone through a dozen of these videos over the past few days between work and theyve all made me cry from feeling that maybe I'm not worthless failure my "family" has made me feel that I am. I'm 28 and was diagnosed with adhd this year after years of being told its bipolar, clinical depression, and generalized anxiety disorder. None of the medications worked until this one. I feel like I've found footing in the hurricane that's been my life.

  • @chelseaalexandracullen555

    Your apple tv remote is on the bottom of your tv remote and that made me so happy. Also, newly diagnosed adult ADHD. Your videos were part of what got me to get tested. Thanks lady!!

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +3

      +Chelsea Alexandra Cullen aww you caught that, huh? :D and that's AWESOME!! Welcome to the tribe!!!

  • @aeea8318
    @aeea8318 Před 2 lety +2

    It looks so much like a check-list for when a baby / child has a meltdown but is soooo true and useful as adults (ADHD or not, including neurotypical), I just cant help but smile 😊

  • @sunteeththegenderpunk6414

    i got a few that work for me (adhd/autism/ocd/depression/anxiety)
    1. let off the emotional pressure: top two ways are screaming or crying. a long car drive in a remote area is a good time to scream as loud and as hard as you can out the window. or watch a very sad video or ten until you cry, then just follow the sadness and cry about everything you can think of thats bothering you. feel sorry for yourself for up to like three hours or so then start to being it back into "im ok"
    2. change your environment a lil; put up some new posters and/or move some furniture a bit, like put the couch in the middle of the room instead, etc
    3. old comedies starring older women; my two mains are the nanny or golden girls

  • @zanedavlight2649
    @zanedavlight2649 Před 3 lety +8

    I’m having a tough time. You are amazing and awesome. This channel is changing my life.

  • @evilkoolade
    @evilkoolade Před 7 lety +15

    Singing is always on my self care list

    • @youtubingbabs
      @youtubingbabs Před 4 lety +1

      For me it's bring very careful how I'm speaking to myself in my mind... The rest follows.

  • @ChiiSan09
    @ChiiSan09 Před 7 lety +47

    thanks... can you do a video about anxiety (or what I call hyper stress)? where one event causes a break in your emotions and makes you break into tears or rage or even dead silence... cause with my job, I could use some tips!!!

  • @valerenzia9208
    @valerenzia9208 Před 5 lety +4

    Self-care is hard lately... As I watched this video, tears came to my eyes... None-the-less, Thank you Jessica for this wonderful channel. And not to worry, as bad as I feel right now, I KNOW this will come to pass. Eventually, I WILL feel better.

  • @meagymae2232
    @meagymae2232 Před 7 lety +16

    Hey Jessica! I just wanted to say that you are an inspiration to me! I have struggled all my life with undiagnosed ADHD, but when I saw your channel it helped me understand that I wasn't alone and that I wasn't crazy. You helped me to take that final step and I finally got a diagnosis at 19. Now I have been doing so much better and, even though I still struggle with attention, mistakes and organising at times, I have finally realised how capable I really am and for the first time I actually believe in myself and can recognise that I am good enough. Thank you so much for making these videos! You have changed so many people's lives for the better! :')

  • @mollysadler6495
    @mollysadler6495 Před 7 lety +104

    Thank you so much for these videos. Not only are they helpful, they're uplifting. I feel supported and safe in this community knowing that there are people just like me! You're super funny and genuine in a way very few CZcamsrs are. I've struggled with ADHD and the subsequent depressive episodes that are often entailed in the disorder for years and this video makes me feel like I am less alone and better understood. Thank you so much Jessica!! :)))

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +26

      +Molly Sadler those are the best compliments I could hope for, thank you!!! It's important to me that ADHD brains feel safe and supported here, we're all in this together!

    • @micks336
      @micks336 Před 6 lety +3

      Yes these videos are so fun. I could binge watch all day. I have watched some Dr. Amen videos, and he has lots of boring information. Although it's certainly common sense stuff and I have more of an idea of where my doctor is going with the meds. I am 40 and I have inattentive type over focused. You should see me drive.. lol we are not all bad drivers. I don't like left hand turns because tgey require focus from too many places. Jessica helps with real life issues like getting homework or house work done. The pomodoro I use all the time and I made like ten glitter bottles and started a bullet journal. It's like a light bulb agenda. The anxiety I had over groceries is gone. It's okay to graze and cook one meal or two a week. I am child free so I can eat like one :S lol ... I have adhd, but it's a super power that you learn how to use for your benefit.

    • @Sunshinejkc
      @Sunshinejkc Před 5 lety

      Lol

    • @Sunshinejkc
      @Sunshinejkc Před 5 lety

      Yesss I agree

  • @kimismith18
    @kimismith18 Před 7 lety +87

    Needed that, thanks!

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +9

      hope it helps!!! :D

    • @jenakayjlh7429
      @jenakayjlh7429 Před 7 lety +2

      How to ADHD same here, Kimi. It does, thank you Jessica!

    • @olgamoraiti
      @olgamoraiti Před 7 lety +4

      It helps so much.. Thank u . Has been a rough week and by watching this I feel I'm not alone.

    • @kimismith18
      @kimismith18 Před 7 lety +2

      How to ADHD Thanks it does. I'm actually a psych RN and I always forget to take care of myself. Like....I just worked two 12 hour shifts and in the last 3 days I've only gotten 6 hours of sleep. *sigh*

    • @Palitato
      @Palitato Před 7 lety +1

      Kimi, I've had night shifts (Go in at 3am type things) and haven't been able to sleep more than 3-4 hours beforehand each night. It's driving me crazy! Thankfully I have two days off now, so hopefully I can get some rest!

  • @janetteyssy5721
    @janetteyssy5721 Před 7 lety +13

    I don't know if I'm a brain, but, you kind of make me want to be. I have some chronic headache and migraine issues as well as depression, Seems like there might be some similar symptoms with depression and ADHD idk, but I relate to and find value in your content. I am glad that you were able to find a purpose that excites, fulfills, motivates, and encourages you. I'm still looking for that. Every time I think I might have a possibility, it seems, it's not long before I can no longer muster the energy to continue. I might have something now so I'm cautiously optimistic. Woooowww, TMI anyone? Well, I'm not apologizing for it and I'm not deleting it. Instead, I'm just going to say- thank you to anyone who took the time to read this and thank you to Howtoadhd for all of your great advice to brains, and hearts, and spirits like me.

  • @diegocarmona2640
    @diegocarmona2640 Před 6 lety +4

    Thanks for the video... I've tried looking for something like this... I have ADHD with a side of impulsive and depression... and usually when I go with my therapist we talk most off my family, (I'm a father of two girls) and I've had some really tough times that it's hard to get out of that depressive state and sometimes I have really dark thoughts about going out guns blazing, and when I saw this video... it really helped a lot, so, from the bottom of my heart, Thank you Brain :)

  • @jessmclean7697
    @jessmclean7697 Před 7 lety +32

    I'm so glad I found this community of adhders it's given me so much support and if I ever need an answer to a question or just a bit of advice I always know where to go. ☺️

  • @georgetourloukis7194
    @georgetourloukis7194 Před 4 lety +2

    I know that this video is old and all but in the past 1 year i have found it imposible to deal with my ADHD+aspergers+depression and your videos (this especially was the switch) have made me actually wanting to start helping myself and to not feed so alone i honestly want to thank you for everything you've done for me without even knowing me

  • @keeblord
    @keeblord Před 5 lety +2

    I literally say to my parents that almost every single day is stressful and not ok :) thanks for the video!! I have a more intense ADHD ever since I discovered I had it 2 years ago. This vid helped me a lot!!

  • @heyitsfaithlol4132
    @heyitsfaithlol4132 Před 7 lety +16

    I just found this channel and it is helping me understand so much more about myself! I have ADHD anxiety and depression. So I just wanted to say I been reading the comments and it's such a good community so everyone who sees this comment thank you for being you!

    • @fetterkeks2796
      @fetterkeks2796 Před 7 měsíci

      Six years later, this just put a smile on my face, thank you very much. :)
      Thanks for being you as well!

  • @davidboltbear147
    @davidboltbear147 Před 7 lety +41

    You're amazing, Your videos always make me feel I'm not alone :)

  • @JudeeCorvina
    @JudeeCorvina Před 6 lety +1

    Last night I had a panic attack, and I didn’t know what to do. It started in my bedroom, in the dark, and I was scared. So I left and hid in my bathroom, where it was bright, and my bed wasn’t in sight. Eventually I came to my mom, and she told me to go downstairs, drink hot cocoa, and watch this video. And it helped a lot. I didn’t watch this video of yours yet since usually I’m happy and okay. So thank you Jessica

  • @janelleberryman-nosik8246

    I am so grateful for you and for the videos you’re making. I am 63 years old and have just this past August been diagnosed with ADHD. I do have to say: School was fun... except for sitting in class, listening to a teacher, and doing homework. I think recess was my favorite class, and gym was my second. (The only reason gym wasn’t my favorite was because of gym shorts. Not my favorite article of clothing.) My report cards from school (yes, I still have them) with their comments about being my being disruptive, talking too much, being unable to sit still, has such potential if she could only focus her energy, so bright but fails to pay attention, etc.,, were so discouraging. Had my fifth grade teacher not stayed after school with me every school day for half a year, I’d have flunked. Had my prealgebra teacher in high school not stayed after school with me every school day trying to help me “get it,” I’d have failed; and, the only reason I didn’t fail wasn’t because I “got it,” he said it was because I tried too hard and I was there every day.
    My resume is that if a veritable job gypsy and I’ve moved almost once every two years. I’ve been married three times, divorced twice and been in several failed relationships. For many years, I used alcohol to make life more bearable and to feel normal. When that quit working for me, I eventually quit. What did work perfectly and truly allowed my brain and body to stay in sync was another substance - though highly illegal - which I also eventually quit. I smoked. I quit.
    I abused my body with food. Had bulimia. I quit the practice of bulimia. I still can use food to self-medicate.
    These days, thank goodness, I go to the gym (and, yes, the exercise helps; something I couldn’t stay committed to if I couldn’t listen to CZcams and workout at the same time... and I do listen to other motivational/ informational/ educational/ inspirational/ fun videos on YT).
    I’ve felt like a failure and have struggled with self-esteem /self-worth/worthiness issues nearly all of my life (since age four, to be exact) because of this Neuro-atypical brain function (at least, I think I remember that’s what you call ADHD).
    Cannot do desk jobs. Wasn’t able to finish college, either.
    You are giving me hope, though, because I see I’m not alone. I see there are things I can do to manage and improve my life and how O function in it.
    Thank you for all you do.
    Please keep up the wonderful work!

    • @NotaNazgul
      @NotaNazgul Před 6 měsíci

      Thank you for sharing this. It helps me a lot right now. More beautiful stuff and more mistakes will happen. But there is a way forward. We are not alone.
      Many hugs to you!

  • @newro682
    @newro682 Před 5 lety +4

    Hugs to everyone who made comments. Thanks for being in this with me. ADHD won today.

    • @NotaNazgul
      @NotaNazgul Před 6 měsíci

      Hugs to you, my friend :)

  • @kyliem3881
    @kyliem3881 Před 7 lety +10

    I just wanted to thank you. You have been there for me without knowing it because of these videos. I just started high school and you basically got me through midterms. Thank you

  • @dee.e8768
    @dee.e8768 Před 7 lety +2

    All I want to say is that I really needed this. It was the most comfort I've gotten in the last two months. Thank you so much.

  • @keithgreer1730
    @keithgreer1730 Před 4 lety +1

    This helps! I like that you allow yourself to be SEEN to be off and tired. You can tell the subtle differences and it's good to connect that way.

  • @PlebeianGoth
    @PlebeianGoth Před 7 lety +40

    I don't know why or how you manage to release specific videos exactly when I need them, but thank you for doing so. Hope things pick up for you soon!

  • @mintsnake
    @mintsnake Před 2 lety +5

    Thank you CZcams algorithms, and thank you Jessica! I seriously needed to hear this today. I’ve been in a bad patch with high anxiety and low productivity, skipping showers, not journaling and at one point I didn’t change my pajamas for 2 days. I’m at the tail end now where I’m trying to get out of it after recognizing where I’m at. Help comes when you look for it. I haven’t been diagnosed, but I’m pretty sure I have it. I’m 37 and have found a lot of coping mechanisms before even realizing I might have it. Now that I do, I’m wondering do I even need counseling? Genuine question.

  • @alexbazzelle377
    @alexbazzelle377 Před 7 lety +9

    I love this. I put it in a playlist of its own titled "IMPORTANT!!!!"

  • @om1701d
    @om1701d Před 7 lety +40

    hello brains!

  • @imetali1
    @imetali1 Před 7 lety +42

    ty, the video reminded me of taking my medication =D , by the way i have asperger syndrom (a highfunction autism disorder), i was miss diagnosticated with adhd when i was young and at 22 a psyc diagnosticated me as a aspie , both have alot of similaritys too some of your videos helped me alot thanks aigan
    sorry for grammar im not from english language country (brazil)

    • @sirenofsound
      @sirenofsound Před 7 lety +9

      imetali1 same, taking meds right now! I have ADHD & bipolar, and it's so wonderful to have a community on CZcams where we know we aren't islands in our symptoms and management.

  • @miadreamer61
    @miadreamer61 Před 7 lety +6

    some bright and colorful posters or paintings on your walls might help, I know it helps me...something little not many people notice. but if you put what's in your brain out in front of you and use it as decoration, it's very hulpful. I know seeing the chaos instead of being stuck in my brain with it helps to release a lot of stress. just something I have noticed that helps...😊

  • @qeithwreid7745
    @qeithwreid7745 Před rokem +2

    Just watching this sorts my head out. I love your dog.

  • @Mintpastiller
    @Mintpastiller Před 7 lety +1

    Hi! I'm a 24 year old female and I was diagnosed with ADHD yesterday. It came a bit as a shock to me because I thought I was leaning towards AS or just ADD. Somehow the h snuck in there. I got medication right away and I'm on my first day. It's a relief to have some explanations but it's also a bit scary. (Lot of self-doubt and such).
    When I've read about the classic symptoms and criteria I haven't related to them too much. I know it's a spectrum and issues manifest in different ways other than the "stereotypical" ADHD. You don't fit the bill on everything and so on.
    So I went on the internet, as you do, to find more information and specifically things to relate to. I found this channel and it really spoke to me. I've watched a lot of the videos already while letting the news of my ADHD sink in. They're so helpful and I'm so happy I found it. Thank you!

  • @organizedadhdchaos8406
    @organizedadhdchaos8406 Před 7 lety +11

    This video was very timely - I've had a really rough month too. These tips really do help.

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +4

      *hugs* I'm here if you wanna talk, message me!

  • @iamdianeleee
    @iamdianeleee Před 7 lety +5

    You couldn't have posted this video at a more perfect time. I too have been having a really rough month, as much as I hate to admit it. Thank you so much for creating this channel and being open to share your experience; I have even worked in the mental health field and still am not always comfortable with sharing all of my feelings. I hope things get better for you and I look forward to more videos! :D

  • @ryanwalthuis1928
    @ryanwalthuis1928 Před 7 lety +2

    so many days go by that I feel this way. thank you for posting these videos. the adhd community is lucky to have you.

  • @TheDreamCrosser
    @TheDreamCrosser Před 7 lety +1

    This woman has done it again! Thank you for being a wonderful human being and giving me hope!

  • @brandiblankenship2711
    @brandiblankenship2711 Před 7 lety +3

    I'm sorry you've had a rough month. I just wanted to let you know that your videos have impacted my life in such a positive way. Thank you for everything you do. You've saved my relationship and my sanity. Keep your head up, girly!

  • @TheMysterysea
    @TheMysterysea Před 7 lety +5

    You're very inspiring Jessica. I think I speak for all of us when I say, you have really changed youtube for the better. Keep it up!

  • @Cameltoerodeooooo
    @Cameltoerodeooooo Před 6 lety +1

    I’m nearly 50 years old and your series has helped me SO much. This was great. Thank you.

  • @amandaouellette3416
    @amandaouellette3416 Před 7 lety +2

    You are not only adorable to watch but also so incredibly helpful!!!
    Thank you for being you and doing this show!!

  • @mcmc3081
    @mcmc3081 Před 4 lety +3

    Hi Jessica, I just had to tell you how much I love all your videos, and this one especially! My ADHD coach and I have been talking a lot about "daily tools" to use when the going gets rough, and I found this video so relevant and useful! I shared it with my coach too and she loves it--thank you for making content that's always so uplifting and accessible--you really make a difference and you make me feel so much better every time I watch what you post!

  • @kyraa5956
    @kyraa5956 Před 7 lety +3

    Jessica, you are the most amazing person ever. You are making such a difference in so many people's lives. Thank you so much for that❤️

  • @live4life767
    @live4life767 Před 3 lety +2

    Jessica, thank you for this checklist video most of the time when I’m goin thru the “downs” of my ADHD I don’t realize it. This is very helpful. God bless you.

  • @drakemcintyre2333
    @drakemcintyre2333 Před 7 lety +2

    Thank you for your videos, they're a big help and always makes me feel better about the problems I have with my ADHD and depression. They make me see I'm not alone.

  • @Sigpod
    @Sigpod Před 7 lety +3

    I hope you're feeling better and don't forget to listen to yourself when you're having a rough time or talk to friends and family. Keep up the amazing content!!

  • @susanelgersma8564
    @susanelgersma8564 Před 7 lety +17

    I love your commitment (the shower scene made me smile)!!! two months ago they diagnosed ADHD and i'm almost 19 y/o. your vlogs made so much things much clearer/easier and your enthousiasm is so awesome. :D

  • @tigersfan61979
    @tigersfan61979 Před 7 lety +2

    Thank you Jessica. My ADHD has been on the verge of winning for a few weeks now, and while I'm sorry it beat you, it's comforting to hear from others that I'm not the only one.

  • @arithemama4336
    @arithemama4336 Před 5 lety +2

    You are really, genuinely wonderful. I'm having an especially awful week (or two, or month) and have both ADD and depression, and I REALLY appreciate this list! Thank you ;-*

  • @TheTamorres
    @TheTamorres Před 7 lety +4

    please dont ever give up! i love you so much and i look up to you.. when i feel down or anxious, i watch your videos and i feel 10 times better! thank you so much for doing this

    • @HowtoADHD
      @HowtoADHD  Před 7 lety +3

      +Happy Hippo aww thank you! It's messages like this that keep me going :)

  • @jessicarutter615
    @jessicarutter615 Před 7 lety +5

    Love Jessica's videos!!! Very helpful. Wish you could make a video on how to cope without the Vyvanse, that's my struggle right now. Def is a lot easier to take control of the symptoms with medication.

  • @molollyvlogs1186
    @molollyvlogs1186 Před 7 lety +1

    Thank you for making this! College has been giving me a pretty rough time and I've been feeling pretty drained, it was nice to have some ideas of what could help - now and in the future, when I inevitably have another depressive episode. Somehow this channel always makes me feel so much better! 💙

  • @troycifer42
    @troycifer42 Před 6 lety +2

    Thank you for making these videos! Finally someone that understands and explains ADHD in ADHD terms and has ADHD so they know what it is like! You're awesome!

  • @amyf8465
    @amyf8465 Před 7 lety +3

    Thank you for the perfect timing - I just moved to a new country (alone!) which is exciting but so far my brain has been on total overdrive keeping up with everything I have to do to settle in, so I've had a LOT of bad, unproductive days this week... PS I'm glad you made it out of your bad month =)

  • @RobbyNiemi
    @RobbyNiemi Před 7 lety +11

    im not sure if its to late for me. I'm a 32 year old child who cant keep his crap together my wife of 10 years refered to herself as a mother and not a wife. i take adderall and it helps get my 200 projects half way done perfectly. im a pretty smart person in general. Smart enough to see when i know that I am a wreck of of a human being. ive watch just a few of these videos and all of them describes my brain to a tee and with it being a rough couple years of the perpetual cycle of madness i kinda makes me want to end it all for the benefit to the people that means the most to me in my life.

    • @robertsilvestro8446
      @robertsilvestro8446 Před 5 lety +2

      Robby Niemi I hope I'm not to late. But it's a struggle. I'm 40 and was you age when I got divorced. Try if you haven't couples counseling. It helped with our communication. Reach out if you ever feel like ending it. It's not the way, that I can promise you. I've had a few friends do that and its just not the way to go. I'm sorry I just say this post. I have just found Jessicas channel. Stay positive. Don't forget to breath. I have some tips on trying to stay on track. Because I know the routine start a project and end up with 10 more with a bigger mess.

    • @robertsilvestro8446
      @robertsilvestro8446 Před 5 lety

      Robby Niemi hope your doing well!

    • @benjaminklenner4240
      @benjaminklenner4240 Před 5 lety

      Can totally relate...

  • @stringytoe1451
    @stringytoe1451 Před 7 lety +1

    You offer comfort AND solutions, ones that actually work. You are my freakin hero dude.

  • @jhummelgaard9310
    @jhummelgaard9310 Před rokem +1

    I went from showering once a week to twice a week! Still recovering from depression.. I don't have an ADD diagnosis yet but I have promised myself to fight with the authorities until I get one!
    Great Video! I live with my dad now, he's the only reason everything is in order.. I will definitely need ADHD strategies when I'll live by myself!

  • @kayakb
    @kayakb Před 7 lety +4

    I needed this. I've been so "meh" yesterday and today. I've just felt like I needed to cry & felt alone. :/ I'll try this!

  • @Polyhat_
    @Polyhat_ Před 7 lety +6

    so so perfect, thank you! you covered all basis

  • @autumnnnnnnnnnnnnnn7149

    No joke, i've just binged a ton of your videos and i cannot put into words how much they've helped me. Thank you so much for making them!

  • @Nocra181
    @Nocra181 Před 7 lety +2

    Love this video. Had a bad day last week. Did most of the stuff on the checklist. Really helped! Thank you!

  • @kitdubhran2968
    @kitdubhran2968 Před 7 lety +4

    I originally started watching this show for my roommate. But this video is so relevant it's not funny. Thank you!

  • @antonthyrestam5125
    @antonthyrestam5125 Před 7 lety +16

    I had that day yesterday and wasn't able to do anything until I just did something cool and easy. I went outside and lit a candle, then I placed a lighter on top of it and waited a few seconds. After that I felt happy and could do other stuff😀
    And yes I like fire and dangerous things🙃

  • @sassythriftlife
    @sassythriftlife Před 6 lety +1

    Thank you so much for making this video. I really needed it. It's been a rough month indeed, but I am feeling more hopeful now.

  • @sweetbeef8562
    @sweetbeef8562 Před 2 lety

    4 years later and I have found this for the first time and both of this and the shorter version have become very helpful for me.
    Thank you.

  • @skialarmahar6991
    @skialarmahar6991 Před 7 lety +3

    Once again, a very wonderful video! But is it weird that I have ADHD and, yet, have never felt depressed? (or maybe only once--I don't entirely remember lol) I'm really happy very often all the time... I mean, until something happens to me upset me. Then I'm like UGHHHGHHH (that's mostly when my little sister comes home from school 😐 :P).
    Also, the Edward hug part was my favorite 😂😂

  • @cinthiamendoza9575
    @cinthiamendoza9575 Před 7 lety +12

    I have a bit of a long question. Hopefully you are able to answer it. Why doesn't my family believe that adhd is an actual serious disorder? My oldest sister told me that a lot of people have it and if it was very serious I would be put in special ed classes. My mom completely denied that adhd was a real thing and said that it was all In my head. That it was just me being lazy. I feel so alone. I am so thankful that I found your videos. You made me realize that I'm not as different and stupid as I've always thought I was. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

    • @easyflowing
      @easyflowing Před 6 lety +1

      Cinarah Mendoza I am so glad that you have discovered this channel. Your family’s attitude toward you is called ignorance. You are not alone 😊

    • @PeaceNLiebe
      @PeaceNLiebe Před 5 lety +1

      Cinthia Mendoza I know this is really late but wanted to say something as I also come from a family that is ignorant and even used ADHD against me (would call me crazy and say my meds are to blame.) I have sisters who do not believe ADHD is real. Along with all of that my boyfriend at the time always tried to convince me to go the “natural” route (even though he never knew about integrative medicine.) All the pressure got to me and I listened to what others believed instead of listening to myself and my doctor. Let me tell you, 7 years later that probably is one of the biggest mistakes/learning lessons I went through. I highly recommend getting the help you need and speaking to your school counselor. Being diagnosed and treated turned my life around not just once but twice. It gave me the ability to function better, to learn how to take better care of my wants and needs, and take responsibility for myself & life when my parents/family were unable.

  • @cyrillambayong4128
    @cyrillambayong4128 Před 4 lety +1

    Just when I needed it most, this made me smile. Thank you Jessica 💓

  • @Lennroe
    @Lennroe Před 6 lety

    This is exactly how I feel when exams are coming, like right now, I can't concentrate for a longer time anyway, but these days, five minutes are a problem. You're so right, sometimes, when you look forward, you don't see the 5 exams you already did, the two rooms you already cleaned, the past days you actually got up, dressed up and went to work altough you thought you're not able to... sometimes looking forward is just so overhelming. Thank you for showing it's not only my thoughts.

  • @jamie4997
    @jamie4997 Před 7 lety +4

    This is an awesome video - thank you :) Probably the top of my list is to snuggle my pet silkie chicken - she's super fluffy and friendly and 'chatters' happily any time of the day or night, which is in stark contrast to alternative living beings who may not always be so happy about it :P

  • @wirtschaftunterricht9540
    @wirtschaftunterricht9540 Před 7 lety +3

    You just safed my day :)

  • @irisangellove
    @irisangellove Před 7 lety +2

    i struggle with ADHD ever since i was born, i felt so out of place and got bullied a lot so i had a lot of days like you did when your adhd won. i can relate to that (: so know you are not alone
    I got diagnosed with depression 2 weeks ago,
    I have to take new medicine because of this and i'm really afraid it will be horrible to adjust to them.
    This checklist got me out of bed and i went to the gym today, i did 22,7 km on a bike there. and i feel proud that i went.
    from now on i will check the checklist when i'm down instead of talking myself down and sad.
    it's worth a try
    thankyou
    xxx

  • @craiger0069
    @craiger0069 Před 6 lety

    Thank you for your honesty and not trying to cut out all the bad moments.

  • @victoria6147
    @victoria6147 Před 7 lety +5

    This video came at the right time! Loving all te Doctor Who stuff too :P

  • @ShaawKP
    @ShaawKP Před 7 lety +4

    While I'd never heard of this checklist until watching this video, I've used it's techniques many times before. It is amazing how much forcing yourself to have a shower, a glad of water, get dressed, and have a snack that isn't just junk food can help.
    In a related note from someone who has struggled with adhd for decades... Thank you. Thank you for doing what you do. I wish I'd had access to your videos fifteen or twenty years ago, whay a difference it might have made.

  • @ElliotRose
    @ElliotRose Před 7 lety

    Yes to all of the above. Glad to know other ADD people go through this. Thanks.