Great conversation. I'm curious to find out, Is defensiveness a stress response or is it a by product of a stress response (fight)? And how do we work on it? I agree with mark that a lot of the content out there seems to me geared to wards the anxious people and not enough content is created for avoidant people who tend to pull away during stressful periods. As someone who has a disorganized attachment, it's been refreshing to find content that speaks in what is happening for the avoidant when they pull away. Understanding that a lack of safety to communicate their fears as well as a lack of capacity /emotional bandwidth to show up for oneself or the other person when theor stress response kicks in has been helpful in me understanding some of the places I may need to work on when I am deactivating
Have you checked out the most recent episode I did with Sarah Swain? We talk about the nervous system and healing avoidant attachment (and disorganized). Also the episode I did with her on the Attachment System and the nervous system is essential listening! My guess is those will answer your questions! Let me know if they bring anything else up!
Powerful episode!! This info is so, so needed for creating conscious relationships & continuing the practice of “inner-work”. Loved it!
Just found this woman yesterday. She is the awesome 😎
Jillian is the best! 🩵 Love her honesty and vulnerability. A solid human 🙏🏼
Excellent Mark and Jillian! Thank you so much.
Wow ! Jillian thank you for opening up❤
I haven’t watched it yet but this is the exact collaboration I have been dying for, both of yall are my top two people. Can’t wait to listen!
Great podcast. I enjoy both of your work and great to see this come together.
You guys rock
This is so good!
Great conversation. I'm curious to find out, Is defensiveness a stress response or is it a by product of a stress response (fight)? And how do we work on it?
I agree with mark that a lot of the content out there seems to me geared to wards the anxious people and not enough content is created for avoidant people who tend to pull away during stressful periods. As someone who has a disorganized attachment, it's been refreshing to find content that speaks in what is happening for the avoidant when they pull away. Understanding that a lack of safety to communicate their fears as well as a lack of capacity /emotional bandwidth to show up for oneself or the other person when theor stress response kicks in has been helpful in me understanding some of the places I may need to work on when I am deactivating
Have you checked out the most recent episode I did with Sarah Swain? We talk about the nervous system and healing avoidant attachment (and disorganized). Also the episode I did with her on the Attachment System and the nervous system is essential listening! My guess is those will answer your questions! Let me know if they bring anything else up!
errrrr the avoidant pulls away from anyone. a securely attached person will not tolerate that after a certain amount of time.
Truth! Sometimes it can trigger a securely attached person to become anxious though.
Brilliant