What to expect at the end of life
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- čas přidán 11. 06. 2024
- Nurse Maria describes the common changes that you might notice in someone’s last weeks, days and hours of life. Peter, Shital and Tracey also talk about their personal experiences of looking after their loved ones during this time. If you’re caring for someone who is dying, you might find that there are some things you can relate to. But you might find that you don’t notice these changes or that you notice them at different times - everyone’s experience is different.
Marie Curie is here for people living with any terminal illness, and their families. Visit mariecurie.org.uk or call the Marie Curie Support Line on 0800 090 2309. Calls are free from landlines and mobile phones. Calls are confidential but may be recorded for quality and training purposes.
This video was made in March 2019. If you have any feedback about this video, please email us at review@mariecurie.org.uk or call the Marie Curie Support Line
I got in bed with my Mom on her last day and talked and just held her. She seemed very comfortable and was waiting to see my dad when she died in heaven. The nurses said they have never seen like it. They cried when they saw me hold my mom in bed in her last hours. She brought me into this world and I helped her to leave it peacefully.😥
😢
Dear Lady God Bless You for the love you have her that was the most precious gift .May God comfort you in this loss.
You had your arms around her, now she has her wings wrapped around you. What an amazing moment to share and have to hold on to. She knows you were right there to the very end, amazing. Peace to you and your family. 🕊️💜👼
@@Tracy_Burns Thank you so much for your beautiful words.
@@barbarahowell5492 Thank you so much for thinking of me☺
The way my Mother died was horrible. It will haunt me for the rest of my life.
If you have parents, do everything you can to ensure they are treated with dignity as they die.
What happened
I can relate to this. It's very overwhelming.
42 years after my father passed in a horrible military hospital I still remember how they took his dignity away. I lost my mind that day.
I just recently lost my brother to cancer and it was so painful to watch him suffer he suffered so horribly . I know that this may sound crazy but it was harder watching him suffer than it was to lose him and there was absolutely nothing that I could do to help him other than just to be there for him and I thank God that he let me have as much time with him as I had I just miss him so much . 😞
How are you doing these days? I hope you feel better and keep the memories of your brother alive in your heart!
@@beautyRest1 thank you ! I miss him every day but at least he’s not suffering anymore so that’s a comfort within itself .
@@Rita-yw2tn that’s good to know. I felt the same when my husband died, I was so heartbroken and felt empty, but I took comfort in the fact that he no longer had to suffer. Life goes on somehow-because it has to! Do take care!
@@beautyRest1 I’m so sorry for your loss as well I’ll say a prayer for you and thank you so much for your kindness sweetie . 🙏🏻
My mom passed away from very fast aggressive brain cancer. The hospice staff knew when it was getting close and that gave me an opportunity to call my Dad and brother so we were all with her. It was very peaceful. My father passed 2 years later. We found him at home beside his bed. It still breaks my heart when I think he died alone and scared. I miss them both so much.
I have suffered terrible loss and grief and the most important thing I can tell anybody about it is this: Hug your loved ones and tell them you love them every chance you get because you never know if today is the last time you'll ever see them alive again.
That is so true. We don't know what tomorrow holds
M
No
This is so si true. I lost my mum recently and all I wish for now is to have shown her more love, to hold her and be with her as much as possible but it's too late now. Pls show your loved ones all the love you have for them before they pass
Yes, indeed. Everytime I see my grown babies I hug, kiss, smell them, and tell them that I love them with all my heart.
The hardest experience you will go through.
Having your loved one pass at home is the greatest gift of love you can give.
I made that promise to my mom, if it was in my power she'd pass at home, in her own bed. I delivered on that promise in January. She held on until I told her, your job here is done, go home, she opened her eyes, looked up, took her last breath and was gone from our world. Not a day goes by that I don't miss her. My comfort comes in knowing she's whole now. 🕊️💜🕊️
@Daniel Johnston Thank you for the kind words, they mean a lot to me. I guess our situation was slightly different, we knew Mom was starting to fail, the signs were there. She was diagnosed with vascular dementia and made it exactly 8 days, things happened so fast, 48 hours before she passed she ASKED for a hot dog (lol). That's also when I got a last hug from her and she said.. I love you. It was an amazing experience to share with the person who brought me into this world. I'm haunted at times.. was there more I could've done, hospice said no, but you wonder. I wish there wasn't such a stigma about death, and dying at home, you're absolutely right about being in your own surroundings, familiar sounds, voices. I know in my heart I did right, but it was also the hardest thing I've ever done. Sorry for prattling on, again, thanks for the kind words, peace to you and your family. 💜✌️💜
@Daniel Johnston Your mom knew you were there, never doubt that. Keep that in your heart, she knew. 👼
Lori me to.I lost my mom the night before Thanksgiving at home and my Dad Dec 18th Who was at home until in Wed he went to Hospice then he passed that Friday.It's so hard .Praying for you.
I don't want to die at home. I want to be in the hospital and I don't want people around me as I die, gawking at me.
I had what I think the best experience of my life when I cared for my late partner with terminal cancer in our home for six months till he passed in our bedroom. We spent many moments reminiscing over our several decades together and just sharing our love for each other. I would not have missed that for anything. RIP my darling man, wherever you are be assured I an with you even now 20yrs later.
Never doubt.. he's there, around you, always. Peace to you. ✌️💜🕊️
I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.
🙏💖
A love like that must be a blessing! You lucky man.
He's in a better place. 💙 God has good plans for us
I lost my Mom last week to I guess old age 89yrs. I miss you mom I have terminal cancer and hope to reunite with her in heaven,
Sorry for your loss. I'm pretty sure that there will be beautiful things after death, seeing again loved ones is first on the list.
God bless you and keep you and give you peace.
♥️🙏🏻
Donna bless you ,I’ll keep you in my preys,god bless Ann uk xxxx
Donna//// May I suggest "Life in the World Unseen" will give you a lot of information about heaven. You can download it for free.
I had a good experience with my late hubby in the last hours before his death. He spoke little but he was restful. He spoke to me letting me know what was going on -- He spoke and said -- pray with me. We prayed the Lord’s Prayer and then my twin sister and I sang few church hymns he was familiar. Then he spoke again and said --I’m slowing down. Then the lights started flickering on and off and then my hubby sighed and spoke -- Hi DAD -I imagine there was an embrace and a reunion with his late dad -- His dad may have been there to meet with him and then he took a deep breath once and then again and it was finished - He passed away. Watching this video made me remember him in his last hours prior to his death. I miss him so much. It will be his 5th death anniversary this November 14th. Surely, and know that he is in a better place now. He came in a dream giving me the biggest hug and with a bright smile on his face. I cannot forget that dream -the memory of it will be with me always.
I died when I was 36 and came back. The place I went to was perfect. Perfect temperature perfect lighting perfect smell. I was so peaceful. I saw my mom grandma and great grandma. Everything I loved was there. My mom held her hand out to me. I heard my husband calling. I chose to turn away. Secret regret always, yearning every day now that I am old. I am so disappointed every morning. But I know what's waiting so I have lived my life to the fullest, enjoying almost everything. My life had purpose and I am satisfied. I hope this helps someone.
Wow, thank you for sharing that. That is comforting
Are you person of faith?
I also died and returned a voice twice told me I could stay on the floor and I'd be out for it but wasn't ready to go. Shortly after my daughter died on 3 occasions I was woken to beautiful choir of angels singing. Have faith that you will be with your loved ones again.
@@barbaraclayton2171 what song they singing?
My father passed away 3 weeks ago. The doctors gave him a few months but he lived about a year longer so I was very very lucky to have him longer than what we were told. I miss him. Not only was he my father but he was my best friend.
Always talk to your Dad, he will be around you in Spirit.. he will never leave your side.. he will always hear you. God Bless, thoughts & Blessings for your loss x🌸
Very sorry for your loss. 🙏
From time to time, something will happen and you will think of your late father. In doing so, he will always remain alive in your heart!
So sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself x
Same with my dad. Was my best friend and coolest man I have ever met. My dad was brave and all he said for me to do was for me to man up and he will see me on the other side. Fuck cancer
My mom had stage 4 gastric cancer and spent the last 1.5 years of her life (much past the 6 months expected!) living with us in our home, well cared for. Her death was sudden, seriously, the 1.5 years she lived with us you'd never know she was ill. There were a few bouts of obvious health issues during that time, but they were very few and far between. Then suddenly after Easter, in 2017, she started spending a lot of time sleeping in her recliner, didn't want to go anywhere with us, didn't eat much. I'm an RN and it threw me for a loop....I haven't dealt with this before, not someone in the process of dying in my home, my own mother. She asked me to give her a bed bath...wow, suddenly. I felt like I was allowing her to die...like by not making her eat I was letting it happen...what if it wasn't TIME? Thank GOD for the hospice nurses who saw me through this. My mom passed in less than a week after her "turn". It was peaceful and I was sleeping in the same room with her (dad getting rest in another bedroom) when I woke up to agonal breathing, she had a restless night and I had given her liquid morphine a few times as she seemed uncomfortable. She never woke up, and her heart kept beating until the hospice nurse told her, "it's ok Shirley, you can go" and she did. I appreciated everything hospice did for us. We didn't need to get them involved until about 5 days before she died as she was up and about and doing her own cares so recently before she died. I miss her so much.
Yes. We have just one mother. I told her I would see her soon.
Ill in
It's important that you communicate with your dying loved one that it's OK to go. That you love them and that you'll be OK after they are gone.
My granny passed away peacefully and free from pain even though it took 7 days for her to pass naturally. She took no pain medications as it wasn’t needed. She was 98 and so fortunate that she didn’t go through pain.
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
I firmly believe in providing the most pain free experience to the individual.... death with dignity.... laboring for breath and slow suffocation and the pain of organs shutting down is horrible.... it should be a persons right to decide not to drag things out .... we call it “humane “ to put an animal out of its misery but insist so often for others to keep suffering only to hold on to life for moments longer even if living is agonizing.... that is cruel abusive and inhumane
Animals don't have souls, but people do, so they need to make sure they are right with Jesus before they leave this world so they won't go to hell. ;)
@@dianegorman5296 salvation is a choice of the individual… so why shouldn’t the choice of life or death also be the individuals …?
…btw I do agree .. I .. hope people would be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth .. but it’s not … my.. choice ..
I’ll go ahead and throw this on out there as we’ll because I’m sure eventually it’ll be inquired …. You can be saved AND choose to leave this world … and still be saved … salvation is by grace through faith .. believing that ( 3For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; 4And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures: 1 Corinthians 15:3 kjv.
Believe the truth and accept it. ..because even Satan believes who Christ is but he wants nothing to do with actually accepting…
The sorrow and pain I feel for my sister who is going through this is so great. She’s so young. Prayers go out to everyone going through this.
@ Maribara - I feel your pain 😔
My sister is going through this and she’s only 37. She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer at the beginning of 2016. She fought hard but sadly cancer is winning she approaching the ending days and we are devastated 😭😭
Even though the hospital said there’s nothing they can do and they’ve send her home, we still hope for a miracle or a drug might be discovered soon
It’s so hard to except the reality 😭😭
@@UnlimitedAspirations24 so sorry...:(
Bless you! So sorry...
@@vaquera9368 Thank you !
I hope no one goes through what my sister and us as her family went through. Having your child coming home to die slowly as she starved to death, unable to eat for a month until She passed
It’s torture 😰😰
I am grieving deeply for my beautiful daughter who died unexpectedly age 54. I would like to share with you all that I have been woken hearing beautiful choirs singing on at least 3 occasions. It was angels singing never forget how beautiful it was. I miss my daughter every day the pain is unbelievable . I know I will be with her again.
To witness a loved one's death is something that will stay with you.
Eventhough your love is passing it is very traumatic.
i reckon its the hardest part of life
I’m not sure if I will feel sad or feel excited when the time comes.... I pray everyone have a smooth transition when the time comes.
Amen 🙏🏼
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
@@ericmoore6716 Eric the days have been some warm the past few days but today Thursday it was cool when I woke up this morning...I’m enjoying the summer weather...it goes so fast these days .
@@Mig-nr8hc the weather over there is good so where are you from
@@ericmoore6716 Eastern Canada.
It is reassuring and helpful to know what to expect. But when the person you love dies, you can't prepare yourself for the grief that comes after
davewest
Unfortunately you are correct. Everything changes when you lose someone special.
You are absolutely right and unfortunately is a pain that never goes away you just learn how to live with a better I think. I was with my mom and her last months weeks days in minutes and she had a very peaceful death. With the last exhale of her last breath she said the word "God" information like this helped keep me calm and reassure her in her last days and I am so grateful for that. I miss her terribly and I'll never get over it
This is true! when my wife passed away it was a relief for me because she had suffered so much pain it was awful to watch, the last couple of days of her life she was unconscious, i stayed with her, held her hand, and spoke to her, told her i loved her and that i would never leave her side, i can only hope that she could hear me and that it gave her some comfort in her final hours, but as you said, nothing can prepare for the agonizing grief that you feel when they pass away.
I lost my precious mother and best friend 3-29-10 and the best dad you could ever have 8-20-12. Everything changed and I'm not the same after 11 and 9 years of not seeing them. I saw my dear dad die as the hospice nurse was counting the seconds between his breathes. I think my precious mother knew I couldn't deal with seeing her die and I had left briefly to go to the grocery store when the caregiver called me and said come home. I can't wait to see them in Heaven and it will be the happiest day of my life.
I'm so sorry for you loss, I hope that you're doing ok. 💙 Yes, I've lost some people and pets whom I loved very much and can't wait to meet again too, and I'm sure that your bestfriend and mom also wanted to see their loved ones who passed away. Who knows, maybe they are right now with them in heaven... 🕊
my mom had a burst of energy....She was my best friend, my everything, it will be 2yrs nov13th, I am so lost without her...
I am so sorry to hear that. Stay strong and here are some virtual hugs. 🤗🤗 Remember you are not alone and always talk about it. It might help
I’m so sorry for your loss. I completely understand what you are going through. I lost my mother, and she was my best friend also.
Remember: She wants the best for you. Try to focus on the good times. Try to live your life in honor of her.
I lost my dear mother 16 years ago. It still hurts and I still miss her. That will never change. You learn to accept it more as time goes on. You also are able to recall the dear times without falling completely apart. God bless you and I am sorry for your loss.
@@denicesanders4586 Thanks for sharing. I recently lost my mother, and I miss her so much.
Time heals all wounds but scars remain.
Even though, sometimes the pain is unbearable and incomprehensible, it’ll pass. I’ll honor her for the rest of my life.
I would never want to forget about her even though the pain sometimes is unbearable. She was my best friend, my biggest cheerleader, my counselor, my confidant, and my everything, and now she is my guidance angel. She will always root for me.
I still feel her unconditional love. Thanks again.
@@GMA20494 thankyou so much
This initiative is one of the most charitable and civilized gestures I have seen throughout my life. I haven't lost anyone yet, but your outreach helps combat ignorance, fear and confusion about our end. Thank you very much, good work.
I lost my daughter Kate on 3rd February from a brain tumour she had for nearly 7 years We had Kates Funeral last week, I cant believe she has gone , I just want her back.
Our beautiful special boy, who made it to 14, went to heaven as an angel December 5 2020, I still feel like he is here and I'll go to his hospital style bed and give him hugs and kisses😣 my birthday is February 2 btw.
Irene I know how you feel I lost mine last December. Have faith you will be together again talk to her she is with you and hears. She died unexpectedly the pain is unbearable I want to scream.
@@iwackadoodleyourmarbles9220 my daughter left unexpectedly December 4th.
It gives you clarity on life .. sorry for your loss To the girls ....
7 YEARS? i feel so bad for you! i hope that you will reunite with her
At last some people not treating death as taboo ! We all need to see more videos like this. As heartbreaking as it is 😭😭.
Carol Dickens 2s
What is taboo? You killed god jesus every day..african canibals is where taboo come from..
@@danielaangelescu5333 taboo you moron is just a saying that it is a subject people are too scared to talk about. Oh I have no god !! Why are you talking about cannibals , I have no idea what goes on in your head ! Too be honest I don't want to know any more of your warped mind !
@@caroldickens3028 How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
I nursed my mother dying, in the last early morning i leaned in close to her ear, closed my eyes and asked her to show me where she was. After 15 seconds of asking i had a vision of her standing up and dancing around with a huge grin on her face. She was 74, and lived with so much pain. To see her dancing around and laughing gave me so much joy and she was no longer crippled and in pain. This was a vision she gave me, not a thought in my head of how i perceived her to be. I will always love you mum xxxxxxx
I'm sorry for you loss, I hope that you're doing ok. This vision must be something really special and conforting for you, I'm sure too that she's in a better place 💙
@@Laura-dn1zx thanks. It was a beautiful vision and all I really felt at that time was relief happiness that she was free of pain
I'm very proud of myself because I did absolutely everything there was to do to help my father crossover and I did it ALL. It was peaceful & it was comfortable for him.
There's nothing that I can think of that I didn't do. I made lists every day & I accomplished all of them.
I lost my mom last Thanksgiving morning. She was in home hospice. I enjoyed her stay at my home 🏡. She was happy to be there and be around her family. We all said We love her and we thanked her for being a wonderful mother and friend. I am so happy she was surrounded with love from her family and spiritual brothers and sisters. She actually was smiling and a heart appeared on her cheek that faced us as we held her hand. RIP my dear mother. We thank you for your kindness and prayers you prayed for us 💋.
I firmly believe, that we should educate people more about the 'final' stage of life - that is, death!
When my dad was dying at the hospital, I tried to speak calmly into his ears and to tell him that it was ok for him to move on and not worried about any of us here, including my mom. Tried as hard as I could, I just wasn't able to tell him because I was so choked up with grief. The comforting part for me was when my sister took over and said the same thing to my dad. I saw my dad softly nodded twice, as if he was saying yes he's at peace now and that he was ok to move on. That little soft nod gave me so such comfort because I knew he will be in a better place, with no more pain!
I'm so sorry.
@@cudjoeenoch1253 Thank you 🙏
The end is approaching for my wife and your video has helped me considerably. She is in a nursing home now and has had MS for 26 years. I cared for her at home for 23 years. We live in Queensland Australia.
Saw mom two days ago for the last time . Alzheimer's and Covid infection. The deterioration was devastating. I got there in time. She raised her head 2 times and her hands as I spoke to her . I know she knew I was there. I told her I loved her . I would have nursed her but it wasnt possible.
Love you mummy. RiP Xxx💜💜💜💜
5.3.2021...I LOVE YOU
I'm so sorry for your loss... I hope you're ok and I'm sure you'll see her again one day. 💙 I don't know if you believe in god, but he has better plans for us
Sending my sympathy 🙏
You did what you could do. I'm so glad you were able to be there.🙏
I lost my mum 11 years ago. She was 44. I got a call that it was probably going to happen that night so I went over to the house to stay. She slept in a hospital bed we were given in the living room. Me and my dad slept on the couches in the same room, my other siblings upstairs sleeping also. The heavy breathing all night, and I instantly woke up when it stopped. I kissed her on her head and said it would be ok. She was more worried about how her kids would feel after. How they would cope. I still remember it like it was yesterday. On top of this, my mum and dad were divorced for about 15 years, yet he took time off work to give her 24/7 care. It makes me sad and I guess he still loved her. It hurts when it happens but you have to keep on living for them. We are her kids, we live for her.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope that you're doing ok. Being with her on these last moments must have been something really special. Well, I'm sure she's in a better place 💙
I work as a carer in a nursing home. Marie's presentation is very much right. While I have seen over the years many of my elderly residents "pass away" it still hurts me time and time again. For me the priority is to do all possible within my "job role" to support the resident while they are still with us and the way I achieve comfort is "knowing" that I have done all possible to assist them be comfortable with their needs met. For me to continue working in this field, that peace of mind I must have or else I believe I have no right to be a carer. You must have a natural desire to care for the elderly!
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
My dad died suddenly in front of my mum and I at home 2 days before my bday of a heart attack. Despite a gash on his head where he fell on the floor. He looked so peaceful and all his wrinkles disappeared RIP ♥️
Same. My dad died of a heart attack in front of me. I was 12. He hit his head too before passing out on the floor.
❤️
@@donnaglogowski3619 Hi Donna. My mum died 8 years later of cancer. Death is awful however you pass but if there was a choice, I would not choose sudden as there are so many things left to ask and say. X
Sorry girls... ♡♡ Everything is ok with the dead.
I loss my dad he had prostate cancer I miss my dad so much RIP November 16, 2019. I miss you daddy😪
Much Love Pamela
Pamela T so sorry 😞
I'm so sorry for your loss. Grieving is really hard. It gets easier, hang in there.
May he rest in peace
Pamela T
My sincere sympathy for your loss.
I lost my father in 2019 also.
Life is very empty without him. 💔
I was with my Dad and second Wife at home when he passed, the Macmillan Nurse was a great help, explaining what was happening in the last hours was totally normal, he was agitated and they gave him some drugs to relax and help with the pain and he passed peacefully with people who loved him in his own home in 2007. The experience has helped me cope with my own terminal illness and I wish to die at home with my family around me, my biggest worry is leaving a 12 and 11 year old boys without a Dad, my only regret is I wont get to see them become Men.
I am so sorry to read your story. I hope you can explain as much as possible to your boys and have the support you need. Thinking of you 🌈
My heart goes out to you ❤️God bless you and your sons ❤️
You will be with them every single step of their life journeys, the conscience goes on, we are here for but a heartbeat. You are in my prayers.
You will get to see them become men, this isn't your time to leave yet, hold onto that truth.
Sir I am so sorry that you lost your precious dad and you are now facing the same thing. My heart aches for you, especially what you said about not seeing thrm grow up to be men. I am one of Jehovah's witnesses, and through my research of the bible I have learned that God is so loving. 1John 4:8. And in his word he declares, "I do not take in pleasure in the death of anyone. Ezekiel 18:32. Therefore he promises: "And the last enemy, death, is to be brought to nothing." 1Corinthians 15:26. Jehovah sent his Son, Jesus, so that we might have life everlasting through the resurrection of the dead. During biblical times Jesus brought many back to life. He resurrected the only son of a widow, and a little 12-year old girl. When his friend Lazarus died he comforted his sisters by telling them, "I am the resurrection and the life. The one who exercises faith in me, even though he dies, will come to life." Then after saying those comforting words he brought Lazarus back to life. Soon Jesus will resurrect the billions who have died, and they will be reunited with the loved ones they left behind in a beautiful paradise earth that God is soon creating. Sir, teach your sons these things while you're still here, and you will definitely see them again as men. There's so much more I want to share with you, but I urge you to go on our website, JW.ORG. Millions visit it everyday to have their questions about life and desth answered for them in a truthful way. You can request someone to assist you to understand God's beautiful purpose for humans on that site, and believe me his purpose was never for humans to die. Rev 21 verse 4. So if you want to be with your sons again please ask Jehovah, the name of the Almighty God to help you to understand his purpose. I will keep you snd your family in my prsyers. May God comfort you through this sad trial you are going through. Take care.
We don't allow animals to suffer this way. We are merciful and compassionate when it comes to sparing them the horrors of dying of disease and old age.
but we're not merciful towards humans, cause who cares about them, their big brains can experience so much more suffering let's make them suffer even more... :)
Disgusting isn't it?
I'm in favor of medical euthanasia.. but the consent should come from that patient himself when he's still able to have rational thinking.. not when he's already in the death bed!.. it's should be a pre-signed agreement.. family members can't decide.. or else evil family members will really utilize that previlage to get rid of their dying family member to avoid responsibility.
If the state ever has power over these things God help us.
That’s why you make their last moments comfortable. People aren’t animals. Life is precious every moment until the very last breath.
My grandfather passed away a few days ago because of his poor heart. R.I.P. Grandpa :(
I'm so sorry for your loss Monika, may Grandpa Rest In Peace.
@@peppersander2457 Thank you
He's in a better place, 💙 god has good plans for us
My grandfather recently passed away at age 84, and his passing still lingers (especially with my dad). He had dementia that struck fast. I'm crying a little bit as I type this...At least he's at peace now....
He was such a wonderful, fascinating, intelligent person, and I will never forget him.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope that you're doing ok. 💙 I'm sure that you too will meet again one day, in a better place where he will be very healthy and young again... 🕊
Dear Rainbow Kittenz, I just recently lost my dad to the same thing, Didn't know he had it which made it even harder. He had a stroke on a Tuesday, Wednesday he was doing great, That night a complete 180, It was such a shock, And very difficult to watch what was happening to him, But he wanted to be home when he passed and I promised him that's where he would be, Got him home Friday morning and he passed that night 😢 It took the hospice nurse 6 hours to get him comfortable he was so agitated, That was hard to see, But me and my daughters and son in laws stayed with him and talked to him him, Turned on his favorite music ( 50s and 60s ) We were going to take turns giving him his meds and trying to get some sleep, he had to have meds every hour and a half. The rest of us laid down to try to get some sleep my youngest daughter was getting ready to give him his meds and he started taking his last breaths she woke us all up and we were with him when he passed, We all truly believe he waited till we all settled down. I miss him so bad, He was my dad and best friend. That kind of dementia is horrible and happens fast. God Bless anyone who has had to go through it.
My mother was bed-ridden the last 2 yrs or so of her life due to breaking her hip in a fall. We brought her home when they would release her from the hospital where she'd spent a few months for her surgeries (she broke her right wrist in the fall too). Her and my father had always said they wanted to be at home at the end so that's what we did. Over those 2 yrs she got progressively worse (she never could walk though even from the beginning because her hip didn't heal properly). Other than not being able to get out of bed she was fairly "normal", still could speak and ate/drank, even enjoyed her morning cup of coffee as usual. As things progressed she needed help speaking (she had slight dementia) and the last 6-9 months she had to be fed and could no longer speak at all. Her and I had this "thing" we did with each other which might sound strange but we stared deeply into each others eyes as if we were communicating that's what it felt like to me, for about 3-5 mins or so. I remember leaning in closely and whispering in her ear that if she wanted to "go" she should "let go", that it would be okay. I didn't want to think she was just hanging on for the family. So her final 2 days she slipped into a coma and then she started this, what seemed to be, very labored breathing. This went on for the final 2 days (24/7) and the sweet Hospice ladies told us that this was the end for her. The labored breathing finally ended as did her life. She was my best friend and I'll never get over her leaving. It's been 11 yrs ago now and I still talk to her every single day. It's still difficult but I know I will see her again someday. R.I.P. Mom, I can't wait to see you again. I love you so much.
Sorry, I wanted to add this: Nurse Maria you are an angel on earth. What you're doing by posting this video is helping so many people you probably don't even realize it and I wanted to thank you for that. You're so kind.
My father-in-law was in the hospital and he expected to be released. He spent sept. 29th calling all the relatives giving them updates on his condition (he had leukemia and was receiving a blood infusion but the drs had said he would probably die of old age since it was very slow growing )He told them not to come since he was “fine”. He sounded happy and his own self. He spent hours on that phone. When I showed up the next day (sept 30th) he was unconscious and the nurses had taken his roommate out of the room for our privacy. They said it wouldn’t be long now. I spent all day with him, just watching. That evening I sat on the bed holding his hand and watching his pulse in his carotid artery (neck). My brother-in-law and girlfriend came but sat there arguing . I just sat quietly on the bed watching. Then the beating in his neck just stopped. Just stopped. No heavy breath out, no death rattle, no movement, the beating just quietly stopped. I sat for a few more minutes watching him and wanting that moment with him for myself. He was my best friend. I told my brother-in-law that he was gone and I left. I sat on the floor in the hallway, waiting for my husband and kids. My husband didn’t want to be there at the end to, as he said, to be at a deathwatch. This was back in 1996 and I still think about him daily. I know now that that day before, him being so chipper and normal calling everyone, was his way to say goodbye. You wouldn’t have thought in a million years that that happy guy would be unconscious in less then 12 hours and passing away that same day. He knew. The nurses knew. I didn’t but will always be comforted by the fact that I was there holding his hand for hours until the end. RIP John Stewart Bean (Jack). September 30th 1996. I’ll always miss you! He was 72 years old.
When my mom passed away I was 15 minutes late I walked in and my relatives said she's gone. I was so hurt I looked in the room where she was laying there and my dad was holding her hand. She went three weeks of pain that I can describe. She's in heaven now resting in the Lords light
I lost mom last summer and I'm still trying to put the pieces together. It still seems so surreal
Sorry for your loss, hope you're taking care of yourself. I recently lost my mother so I get it. One day at a time, things will never be the same, but they'll be ok. Peace to you. 🕊️💜✌️
@@Tracy_Burns thank you. I'm sorry for your loss as well.
@@gregorylincoln4328 You're very welcome. And, thank you.
Why do they reach to you and start pinching on you
@@Tracy_Burns C
Very useful video. This would have been great to know when my mother-in-law was dying. She was in hospice and I had no idea what the signs might be. I was sitting on her bed holding her hand and she died but I didn't even know til a nurse came in, looked at her, and told me. It would be great to have this video transcribed into a pamphlet for whoever spends alot of time with the dying patient. Thank you for making this excellent tutorial
Bless you. My Mom has been deemed palliative and is now non responsive after suffering from dementia for many years. This is very helpful as we expect her to pass in the next few days.Thank-you
Sorry about losing your mom hun.
God bless you and keep you, and give you peace. This is the same thing that we went through October 8th 2020 is when she passed she's held on a lot longer than expected she receive palliative care for about two and a half months before he passed. But I am grateful she was home and I could take care of her well she was here. I know now that she's with God and reconnected with all of our loved ones
I was in the same situation. She passed in hospital with the nurse by her side. Alzheimer's and Covid.
RIP Mummy 5.3.2021 X
I love you 😇😘😢💥💫❣💯💤
I am so sorry for you in your grief. I am thinking of you as you go through this. May God give you peace.
My mother in law had dementia also. I understand what you're experiencing I'm so sorry
R.I.P to my grandparents you two are gone but never forgotten 😭 my heart's broken into a million pieces
May God bless their soul and give you power to overcome this grief
Try to remember the good times u had with them and make them proud and let them bless you from above
God bless you 💗
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope that you're doing ok. 💙 I'm sure that they are in a better place and you'll meet them again some day... 🕊
I promise my brother that I would be there when he died .I lived in Tennessee at the time and he was in Iowa,at the last I lay on one side of his bed and his wife on the other.my heart was broken.Still miss you Rick.
I'm sorry for you loss, I hope that you're doing ok 💙 I'm sure that you two will met again one day... 🕊
Always in mind and heart sending love xx
I was with each of my parents when they passed, such a painful thing to experience and yet I'm so glad I was with them. This video is very informative and so helpful for those who need to know. Thank you.
❤️🤗
I'm so sorry for you loss. Being with them must have been something very special, I'm sure that you'll meet them again one day... 🕊
In those last few days my parents knew they would die, they were saying goodbye.
Tears tears tears and more tears for the loved ones. It’s such a powerful event.
robbiepeterh so true 😓
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Very interesting!
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As a religious person, I have been able to come to terms with the deaths of my many loved ones. This in turn allows me peace when considering my own passing. A challenge with cancer for my self with what I call the full meal deal in treatment brought it all home tome. We all pass as they say no one gets out alive. Our society has tried to negate death which of course causes Hugh cognitive differences when it happens. Live your life as if everyday is your last because we never know.
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
Thank you for explaining. I went through this with my mom 4 years ago and am now preparing to go through it with my dad. I need these reminders as I approach this difficult experience once again. God bless all who must experience this.
My Mom passed away last year Dec 26 2021 the day right after Christmas...I'm so heartbroken 💔 and i will never get over her passing 😭....I Love you 4Ever Mom 😭
My sister just died a couple days ago at home in hospice care. I saw this when my Mom died a number of years back and my relatives saw my brother and sister die as well in hospice. The one thing I want to share is that when my mom, brother and sister died, it was a peaceful death as they were unconscious. But my other sister who died a couple days ago was unconscious for about 3 days then she awoke by the hospice nurse accidently and had not been given any pain meds for those days so when she woke up she was in terrible pain and trying to scream and moan with this look on her face of pure fear and terror but was too weak and frail. We quickly gave her the pain medication and she suffered for 15 to 20 minutes until the pain meds kicked in. Now I see this image in my mind of her going through that and it hurts me inside my feelings even now after she passed away quietly in her sleep the next day. The thing I want to point out is in the last week to couple days the pain meds should be given even if they are asleep or unconscious. Hospice says to give it as needed when you see them in pain but when they are unconscious, you can't really tell. This has never happend before so I'm just letting you know. If your there with them in their last days, use your own judgement as you see what's happening in from of you. Could it hurt them to give them every couple hours, maybe but then again they are going to die any way. Don't let them wake up for God's sake. Unless you want to live with what I saw over and over. Let them die in a restful peaceful sleep.
I really appreciate you writing this comment. It must be awful for you to recall what happened to your sister, but the information you shared is incredibly helpful to me.
It is the 2nd anniversary of my Mum's death in a couple of weeks. We were told 12 weeks before she was terminally ill so we all took turns to care for her in her home. On the last day she had to go to hospital to control her pain, we all sat and talked to her. I was alone with her when I noticed changes and called everyone back to the hospital room. Mum came round a bit and opened her eyes, normally a nice green they were a piercing sky blue. Ahe passed away 10 minutes later as my sister came into the room. It was peaceful, calm and dignified for Mum the blessing she had wanted in the last weeks of life. I miss and love you Mum xx
Godbless you Avril
🤗💖
My mom died two weeks ago and even though she was declining never expected it to happen so fast. This video is on point. I experienced all these things while my mom was in the hospital for 4 days prior to her death. She moaned non stop, breathing labored, kidneys failing, ashy skin, very agitated, scared, restless and couldn’t seem comfortable no matter how many times we adjusted the bed, and asking to help her. Not what I was used to seeing. After given something to relax my mother she seemed to be dosing off and kept saying mom, mom, mom. She had another bad night. The next day she went on comfort care, was unconscious and died 9 hours later. Looking back I wonder if she was suffering all those days and given enough pain meds prior to going on comfort care.
Thank God I got my mom out of a horrible nursing home where they did not care for her properly even though she wasn't there long at all. We were best friends for my entire life. Yes, we all have had our moments of arguments, but that's only human nature when you love someone so deeply. I prayed everyday for the strength to care for her 24/7 in her hospice hospital bed that she was confined to. Two days prior to her passing she was speaking to so many people and I truly believe they were loved ones already in Heaven. I received a call from Hospice the night I felt my mom was going to pass and they told me they had no coverage for that night.
I told them not to worry as I had worked in a hospital years ago doing EKG'S and was at many codes. I had a feeling my mom didn't want anyone around that night except me. I placed some beautiful music from my phone and placed it on her bed and went into the kitchen for just a moment and when I returned she had gone home. My sweet mom didn't want me to see her take her last breath. Prior to that I told her, Mom it's okay to go home now. I miss her so much and she passed away two day's after Christmas this past year. This by far was the hardest experience I've ever gone through in my life.
😪 Please try and remember all the wonderful memories of our loved ones and talk to them as I know they are always near and watching over all of us. xoxo
These kind of conversations are needed. We live in a society where end of life is not the family experience that it should be. People are horrified at the idea of their lived one dying at home or home funerals. Dying has been religated to hospitals, nursing homes or hosipice. Funerals are to be held at funeral homes or churches.
is it possible hospice doctors know end is near when they phone you tell you its tonite
My grandmother was 95 when she died at home. She was very weak, but still had her mental capacities. In her last days she would shut her mouth and would not take her medication and not eat or drink anything. I think she wanted to give up the heartbreak of this world.
Put their comfort first. Thank you x
My mum she passed away at 85 yrs. I felt she was passing away 2 weeks before. I informed all and Sundry that she was badly ill and comingbgto an end. Everyone concerned visited her and chatted with her. The last 3 days I chatted with her till dawn.
Funny .. The day before she passed away. She was pointing to the corner of the room and to her chest and was challenging someone.. I felt as if that person had come to take her. I asked her what..
She said " There is an Old man with a long beard and with a face of a small girl, he has come to take me..."
I cannot forget this.. She gradually faded away and passed away the day after.
Such an honest, important and powerful presentation. Above all, you remove the mystery and fear surrounding the dying process in a loved one. Thank you!
I'm going to give you a strong presentation
I'm going to give you a strong presentation there isn't no death my friend we all go home to the spirit world all of us Earth is our school from Steve Hensman psychic clairvoyant medium
I lost my Mum in June 2017. I’m so thankful she didn’t die in hospital, but in our home, with me beside her at the end. She didn’t die in her own home, as she was very realistic and requested that we take her into our home when she couldn’t cope in her own home any longer. Better than passing in a care home or hospital though.
What a compassionate and thoughtful video.
RIP dad lost his battle to COPD 2 days ago in hospice 😭💔
Sorry to hear that Kjz. We're here if you ever want to chat. You can call our support line on 0800 090 2309.
Kjz zolo But we forget that the soul is eternal. We are spirit...
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Condlolences kj
Satsui Nohado thank you 😓😞
Marie Curie thank you ❤️
My beloved mother just die dicember 15 2020 and she shown "many" of this signs.
I'm so sorry for you loss, I hope that you're doing ok 💙 I'm sure she's in a better place... 🕊
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Thank you for all those who shared their experiences. May god bless you all!
I grew up all over the world i am an old person.was sent away for school when i was around 6 yrs old. Have not seen my family in over 5 decades. 50 + yrs.yes i am sad about it. Both of my parents passed away while i was living abroad. Not easy for me to go overseas and see who's left or still alive from my family. But i have totally accepted life facts. And now i am at peace.
THIS is the best exposition on CZcams of this matter. Thanks for this, it's really helped.
Thank you for sharing this information and these testimonials. Bless all of you helping those with family members who are in the end of their life.
You are angels in what you do thank you so much x
I'm so grateful that both of my parents, die without any of the above. No agitation, no death rattle, they passed on quietly and peacefully. Miss them so much
My friend had cancer and she died while holding my hand. This lady was a tough woman but i remember her eyes i have never seen her scared. I held her hand and said im here i am not going anywhere. Those eyes still make me cry
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
I have begun volunteering for a hospice and cannot wait to learn/ make an impact and help people💙💚💛💜
God has a purpose for you and you have answered the call. Many blessings will come to you for the work you do. 🙏
@@christys8445 Thank you so much for that comment. It means alot. I've also started work at a funeral industry TODAY which went excellent. Cannot wait for day 2!
@@STE.B I am rooting for you. 👍 You are a special angel. 😇
I found this video a little comforting.? I wish I knew about this video months back. I lost my mom back in December of 2020 from dementia and my husband and I were caregivers and plus had someone from hospice come to our house and help us out and she was an angel. She made my mom so comfortable and that made me happy even though my mom had no idea what was happening. It is so sad when your love one is dying right in front of you and you feel so helpless but deep down you know you’re doing your best to help them in their last hours of their life. She was so advanced in her dementia and she was just day by day leaving us. We really didn’t when it all was going to happen but when it did you do gather strength for your love one. The reality didn’t really hit me hard yet because I don’t believe she has pass d on. I still feel her around but I guess it’s life and we do eventually move on. But the video did make me feel more comfortable about what was told. Thank you
The continuation of life is REAL indeed.. Nothing to fear and comforting to know, we WILL after crossing over, experience the Light and Love of Jesus...and also our loved ones too.
My dad passed three weeks ago month on March 20 ,2020
Bless your soul💖 peace and blessings
Thank you so much. This was helpful to me, as I am the patient, and I am a person who always wants to anticipate, analyze, and prepare for life's experiences. I am not afraid of death, but I do worry about the manner of my dying.
I foubd out today my dad has 3 months and then this randomly appears in my youtube
I'm sorry for your struggles. 🖤
Shauna
Try your best to get through this most heartbreaking time.
If your dad is sill here, let him know how much you love him. Thank him for all he has taught you. Remember the good times you shared.
My dad past last year, so I know the pain.
May god bless and comfort you and your family. 💞
There are no accidents. God placed this in front of you for a reason
My sister was 52 and had colon cancer. She was in ICU in so much pain that the nurse couldn’t even put a needle in her arm. She screamed from the pain. She finally passed and the corner said it was the first person he ever saw in his 20 years of practice that went into rigomortas 8 hours before they passed.
Can you explain this please. The nurses never even called her Doctor in and scolded my sister and asked her why she can’t stand a little pain. It was horrible to watch and the nurse made us, her sisters leave the room saying we are upsetting her; although we were quite as a mouse
I was a Carer in the community.
As a male career I was wanted very much .
I spent many an hour unpaid consoling loved ones .
These nurses are amazing. The pallative care teams are incredible. I don't know how they do it.
Lovely vlog. Calm voice, useful information. Makes things less scary.
Thank you for your kind information, we all need to listen to this.
Thank you also for you and nurses like you whom take a tragic time of feeling lost and frightened and help us to cope and adjust.✝️🙏❤️👍👍👍
This was very helpful, thank you so much! My dad is nearing the end of his life, is at home under hospice care. He has prostate cancer that has spread and his body is now riddled with cancer. I have spent more time at his home and with him these last six weeks than maybe ever (my parents separated when I was 6 years old). He is not experiencing these signs or symptoms yet, but the last week there have been some changes. It is so helpful to have an idea of what I could expect to see and hear. His hospice nurse gave me a booklet by Barbara Karnes titled, Gone From My Sight, The Dying Experience. It was also very helpful. Then I ordered her booklet, The Eleventh Hour, the Days and Hours Before Death, which was quite deep and comforting.
Fuck cancer. Just found out that the only medicine that could work for him isn't and that his tumor spread. He hasn't been doing well and has gotten really weak (1.5yrs ago he could move a 200+ lb treadmill, now he needs a cane to walk). He also has been throwing up a LOT and he had fluid build up in his abdominal cavity. That's not uncommon for his cancer (bile duct that metastasized into his liver), but is still a VERY bad sign. So this wasn't surprising, but still disappointing. The tumor is also surprising blood flow to his liver, which, again, isn't great. We don't know how long he has left, but it's likely less than 2 years.
My husband liver cancer and he got covid. I couldn't go to be with him. But I'll see him in. Heaven which is a comfort for me.
I may be facing dealing with death soon. Thank You for the information and the kind way of presenting it. It was very helpful.
I was with my father when he passed, holding his hand. Then I was with my mother in 2016 when she died. The most important thing is too have peace with God. He gives the free gift of eternal life through Jesus. Just say yes. My pafrengts passed peacefully and I know we will talk again. Your consciousness lives on after your body dies. Make sure you are at peace with God.
May we all have peace 🕊️ when a loved one passes God has a big plan for the broken 💔 hearted. Bless the Lord oh my soul amen
You all do a wonderful job. Real champions
Beautifully done. Thanks.
3-58: I witnessed this with my late father back in 1976. The night before he passed, he seemed so restless and was thrashing around - eyes flitting all over the place.
Have stage 4 cancer, absolutely terrified of dying, but this video gave me some reassurance, at least I know what to expect now.
I wish you well. I honestly hope that if you pass from this disease, that you are happy and comforted.
Gerrie it's important to make peace with any you may have anger with as you will carry this into the next world. Go in peace.
Absolutely have no anger issues towards anyone or anything, and I have made peace with myself, but am determined to live as long as possible and not except my prognosis!
Praying for you Gerrie, that you find all the strength, courage and help you need as you go through this time and for your recovery.
this video is very helpful for people who need some reassurance and comfort in these times. thank you for the incredibly strong loved ones talking about this, it helps others not feel alone and rest in peace to all your loved ones
It's so very sad that many people are give a diagnosis and believe that they have no hope for improvement. My mother and father both were diagnosed with cancers when my youngest turned 4. I was a stay at home mother raising 4 children and was a clinical nurse for 8 years. I've seen my fair share of illness, and death, and also thought I was dying on 2013 when I experienced my second attack of pancreatitis. I lost 60lbs in 4 months, and wrote up my will. It's 2020 and I am alive and kicking working daily on improved lifestyle habits and eating habits. It takes great discipline and determination to take the steps to create wellness. I am sorry for all the losses for those who were never introduced to nutrition and food as medicine. My best to you Nurse Maria. Self care matters. Functional Medicine and integrative Medicine is the future of the Health Care System.
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
Thanks for an informative and helpful video.
I lost mom ten years ago, and still miss her and cry. Part of her with me till I die.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope that you're doing ok. 💙 I'm sure that you two will meet again one day...🕊
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there
A very courageous group of people and a very brilliant group of carers represented by that lady presenting this remarkable piece. Very poignant.
It’s important to be kind to yourself, she says, as I have just finished 22 months of going over everything and beating myself up for mistakes I made, and knowing that if I continue with life, well I guess there will be no end to it. I don’t know how to get over the grief. There’s not a day that goes by that something reminds me of my husband, be it a song, or a certain smell, even when I use a phrase of his during a conversation, uttering his words without consciously realizing it until they pass through my lips.
Dear Florida Gal sorry for your loss. It is hard to loose your loved ones. I also lost my dad last year. Believe me you are gonna get through with this. But dear your husband wants to see you smiling and happy, not like this. Please try to find something to make busy yourself. When you are in peace he will be in peace too. Your souls are connected together. Still I know it's hard but time will heal your wound. Lots of prayers and hugs from an NJ Gal. 🙏😘
Please,when you get reminded,think of the good times.The last thing anyone would want is for a loved one to stay sad when we leave this rock.Don't beat yourself up over things that you have no control over.We all have regrets from the past,and would change what we did if we could.That does not make us bad People.We learn from our mistakes.Sorry for your loss.
Iv seen my mother die bless her x was with dad a few hours before and years ago my lovely 12 year old brother xx they were all different x crying now bless you all xx
Lovely calming narrator.
Our dear dad passed recently, it was so terrible to see him suffer , but we cannot forget the help these wonderful people gave us , incredible people giving us so much comfort in difficult times
Thank you for this very important and beautifully presented video...this is probably needed by and helpful to anyone who sees it....sooner or later.
When I worked in skilled nursing facilities, I spent much time sitting with terminally ill patients. After years, I was able to know approximately when the patient would pass. My Mother gave us a verbal review of her life as a teenager. She was not aware of what she was saying. It was bizarre for my sisters and me, but very interesting, and funny. She even spoke in a voice she may have had as a teenager. It was a peaceful passing for her with all of us there.
How are you doing today my name is Eric Moore and how is the weather over there