6 Month Update | Chat About Life After Pregnancy Loss
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- čas přidán 5. 07. 2024
- Baby girl is 6 months old and we are so grateful! Chat with me about life after a traumatic pregnancy and losing one of our baby girls. I want to share some things that were helpful and not helpful as we navigate the grief process and do a project to help me heal.
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One of our couple friends lost their little boy at 3 years old. She and I had been roommates, married cousins and went to the same church. When Roger died, we were all so very sad. The ladies at the church told me I needed to go to her. I knew her best. I said I couldn't...."I have no idea what to say or do." One of the wiser older women said, "You go in and hug her close and say, 'I'm so sorry'. She will take it from there." She was right and I learned a lesson that day. Saying I'm sorry gives them "permission" to talk to you and you to listen. Listening and paying attention to her feelings was so important.
Awww Lauren, what a beautiful vlog.....finding the joy where you can in your children is so important and always thinking of your precious angel in heaven. You have 6 children, 5 on earth and 1 in heaven so yes you are a Mum of 6. Sending so much love to you from Australia
We do have a loving Heavenly Father who is there watching over your sweet baby until you are reunited to raise her. Families are forever. Love you.
I think the saving grace is your fantastic family. Your faith and relationship with Mark helps both of you.
My son passed away when he was 5 1/2 months old. I never knew what I needed either and to this day people that give me sentimental gifts or food. Those heartfelt hugs are so special. I love talking about Jeffery, I was always afraid that I would get him. I had two children that used the NICU in Michigan. With Jeffery I used the services of the Ronald McDonald's house. My oldest son Joshua was born without ustation tubes and he spent alot of time at Mott's children's hospital in Ann Arbor Michigan. I agree with you on so many points. I have also lost 2 sets of twins to miscarriage and had three other miscarriages. People always tell me not to be sad cause those weren't real babies but they were. The sadness hits you sometimes at the craziest times. I love you, your family and following you. May God bless you.
Oh yes, they are so real♥️thank you for sharing your tender thoughts, you will always love your children
I am terribly sorry for your losses❤
Babies are real to a Momma’s heart, whether they are in our arms or in our heavenly Father’s arms.
I was in the hospital with an infection from my cesarean 3 weeks earlier when my best friend’s 5 year old son passed. I consider him my nephew as we have been friends since we were 4. I couldn’t do much at the time he passed, but a few weeks later I sent several restaurant gift cards. She said the timing was actually perfect, because the meal train was done, and she was just not always able to cook for her family of 5 at that time. I remember that now, and try to send gift cards and another note about 2 weeks after a sympathy card.
I had a brother who passed before I was born. He was still born. My mother always remembered him. I always say I am the youngest of a family of 6. I am now 70 and still remember the brother I never met.
Lauren this video is good for you. Hey, remember, she is a girl and us girls are tricky and that makes us special.❤
You are so right. Grief does not have a timeline! We are here for you Lauren!
That little laugh was everything at the end! What a precious family. Loved the framed pictures.
My thoughts and prayers are still with your family. I lost my second son in March
23,1995 when he was still born i was at 40 weeks even though it has many years now,but i do still cry for him his name was Eric Johnathan. in 1998 i had my youngest son in January 1998 at 32 weeks and was in the NICU. He is now 26 years old so i was very blessed.
What I dislike is when people ask how may kids I have and I say 4 and others say know you only have three Jeffery doesn't count. Well he was a real baby. I don't always count the 7 babies from the miscarriages, because they are my babies but weren't at viable ages. Please continue to do what is best for you.
I'm sorry for your losses. But everyone of your babies in heaven are yours..period. So your Jeffery counts!
Your Jeffery definitely counts. A huge hug from me to you.
Agree 💯%
Awe Wuvvies Always For You ❤️💖🥰😍💗
I understand. When people hear I come from a large family they'll ask how many brothers. I have 6, 5 are still living. He didn't stop being my brother. Jeffrey didn't stop being your son. I'm truly sorry for your loss of his presence.
When a loved one passes, we say in Hawai'i, A HUI HOU (until we meet again). Yes, you will meet again with precious Maggie.
Lauren, you are a wonderful mother, to those here and beyond the veil, Heavenly Father loves you all ♥️
What I find in grief is you are never the same. Things set me off after years gone by. It’s almost a “new normal”. I can be present, happy and yet still feel a void. I have not experience infant loss but I have experienced loss. Be gentle with yourself.
babies and childrens laughter is the most beautiful sound in the world
Didnt know ur parents were staying with u all summer. Thats awesome!!😊😊😊❤❤❤
I really appreciate you passing on real world advice on how to help with people going through the grieving process.
Luna letting you know Violet was upset is just the sweetest. Good she can show her needs when she needs her boys attention
Oh my❤those baby giggles are the cherry on the cake!
I was thinking the same thing and for it to be her brothers making her laugh was so beautiful
Grief is everlasting, I stopped watching your channel when you lost precious Maggie. It reminded me of losing my son 😢💔 I just couldn’t deal with it.
Your baby counts, your feelings count! I get what you're talking about. When I lost my dads, I hated seeing people with their dads. Losing a child is the worst. You are in my prayers. ❤😊
You made me recall when my dad was the first of my own and my husband's parents to pass away (now they're all gone). But, yes, I remember seeing older men in the grocery store or here and there, and I felt sad that my father was no longer with us and yet these other men still were. I couldn't imagine losing a baby. I don't think I could ever fully recover.
I lost my mother 9 years ago; I am still dealing with the grief on the daily. So, I get it, there is no timeline .... You're an amazing woman xx
My dad passed 31 years ago, my mom 25. I still grieve them and will, in some way, the rest of my life.
Sometimes the best medicine is a long hug and to just listen. We just do not listen to others enough and that is the best way to show love. In listening intently, you might discover exactly what you can do to help someone who is grieving. Consider yourself hugged and we will always listen. Life is hard on this side of heaven and you have suffered greatly and have inspired many of us.
Thank you so much for sharing with us! You are a very special mom! So glad you can share your feelings! I know it is helpful for others in similar situations!❤🙏
I do not know anyone could get over losing a twin . Mother’s hearts are so tender for their children. I know I would be pulled by caring for my child that survived and the grief of losing my other daughter. Props to even share on any platform your feelings.
The timing of this is amazing. I'm dealing with grief this morning with my 5yo entering hospice. Your videos are so helpful. Even though our situations are different, its comforting seeing someone that doesn't sugarcoat anything. Being a mom can bring so many unexpected things.
You are amazing and are inspiring to so many different moms. ❤
I am so sorry to hear about your sweet little boy. Sending you a big virtual hug and prayers. 🙏
Sweet mama, I’m praying hard for all of you ❤🙏🏼
sending you love, prayers and hugs from Australia,
So sorry to hear about your little boy, you're in my thoughts and prayers ❤
Prayers for you 🙏🙏🙏😇
Grief is the price we pay for love. What a beautiful quote. Praying for your family. ❤
Has it really been 6 months with sweet Violet already 💜 Your precious Daughter Magnolia 🤍 is never far from our thoughts and we continue to pray for you. 🙏
Prayer's & Blessing's ❤ To You & Ur Family...Also For Baby Magnolia (Maggie)
Luna was extremely chatty. It is wonderful that Violet is doing so well. She has the most beautiful smile. The needlework picture is so special.
My baby was killed. It’ll be nine years in September. Had a horrific accident at work and I still miss her every day. I at least cry every day for her and I have no other children and not that that matters or not, but it be nice to focus on something else, besides not having her and not allowed to have children so she was my miracle child so I totally understand what you’re going through. I do good for a while and then something will remind me of her and then I cry.
"hard is not the same as bad" best quote ever. oh how my heart needed to hear that. thank you
That was a very tender and brave video. You look like a vibrant mom and I keep you in my prayers. 😊
Grief is the price we pay for love!!!
- Queen Elizabeth II
May Allah bless her
@@BriaRuwaaWhite WHO'S THAT??
@@Diligent-dp7gi I don't understand how you don't know who the queen of England was 🤣
I held on without crying until you showed the pictures 😢my heart hurts for you and sings for you also🦋
May You be blessed beyond your expectations! God Bless you and your family!!
You also never say, “they’re in Heaven now and they’d never want you to be unhappy or sad”. That’ll take your soul away.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful Maggie with us ❤
Just woke up. I’ll watch this video later today. Honestly, every time I see you get emotional I get tears in my eyes. Violet is so sweet💕
❤ I can’t imagine what you are feeling. My heart hurts for you all. I know that the grief will never go away but I do hope it will hurt less in time. I wish I could hug you and cry with you.
I love how you are honest with your feelings. My heart breaks for what you have been through and rejoices for the gift of Violet. May you always know that you and your family are in my prayers.
We love you all very much. Your family is in our prayers. Big hugs from my boys and I.
Thank you for your heartfelt sharing. Your words will help so many who may be hurting. You are such a dear and precious soul! ❤️
What a beautiful Memory of pictures for Baby Maggie and Violet!!! Big hugs to you as you travel on this journey! Thank you for sharing! We love you all!
Ooh my - those baby giggles are the cherry on the cake!
Lauren, I had an eptopic pregnancy in 1981. So lots of years ago. Even now after all these years I think of my baby. I wonder if the baby was a boy or girl and what would he/she be doing today. I have 3 sons that I’m SO proud of. They became absolutely wonderful people and the best dads. I know one day I’ll see my sweet baby in heaven but know it’s ok to have these feelings as you will for the rest of your life. Time does heal.
Violet laughing at the end of the video is just the sweetest thing. Still sending prayers to you and your family including your little angel Maggie 🤍
You are so right about the "Well at least" comment from people. It is so hurtful. Another one is " I know how you feel". No one knows what another person is feeling or to what extent. We all process things differently. The end of this video just made my heart smile.
My best friend at the time said that to me after my devastating loss of my first baby. This precious baby was conceived after years of infertility treatments. "At least you had an early loss and not what so-and-so had to go through with her baby." Not helpful at all. And my own husband coldly telling me,"We'll have another baby." How do you know? Besides, I wanted THIS baby. I mourned that sweet baby.💔🥹
I think that people mean well, but not having gone through such a loss, they just don't know what to say.
I applaud your honesty , grief is so hard and what you said about what was helpful or not I will remember for the future ,praying for you all as you carry on this journey of grief x
My Granny lost her youngest baby and only son to SIDS at 4 months old when she was in her mid 30’s. She never got over the loss of her little boy though she lived to be 93. No mother should ever be expected to ‘get over’ the loss of a child. Sending love from 🇬🇧
I just love you I lost my daughter Shauna to a brain tumor,all the things you have said are spot on the grief hits like a punch it passes but never goes away 😢❤😢
I grew up with 6 siblings. My Momma always mourned 4 babies she miscarried between my older brother and i. When Mom was 65 they had moved to a place where their church had a memory garden- ppl could buy bricks and the church would engrave them and you could keep them in the memory garden. She had them put " the ones i lost are always with me" and that seemed to help her. My mom was one of those women who were born mothers, her children were her life and nothing was above and beyond for her. We miss her terribly but we feel so lucky to have had both our parents for so long! Love you Lauren. I hope Momma's little story helps. ❤❤❤❤
I had a miscarriage and I know one day when I am no longer here on Earth , I will meet the little one and will take care of him/her , be near and finally hold that baby on my arms. But for now i cherish that baby in my memory and love it just like I love my other children: endlessly.
Sending you strength, love and all positivity.❤❤❤
Lauren, thank you for sharing such a deeply personal time and experience in your lives. ❤️❤️❤️🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
Barely got 3 minutes into the video and I’m crying for you mama. I can not imagine the pain and grief your family is experiencing. I recently had my first baby 4 weeks ago and we both almost did not make it out of birth..thankfully we are both here today..but the trauma from birth is unreal. Though I can not fathom your pain my mama heart reaches out to you. ❤
baby is the cuteis baby iv seen in a long time hun and Magnolia will be the same hun and she will always be with you in your hearts of or spiritual world karthy uk xxxx i think she will rember her sister and maybe this is why she need all the attention she misses Magnolia to big hugs to you all xxxx kathy uk xx
Thank you for this video. We lost our grandson 4 years ago this August, one week before his due date. We almost lost our daughter. I have had a hard time feeling so blessed to still have our daughter and the sadness of losing our grandson. I do not wish this on anyone. I have been following your journey and feeling those emotions with you. Time allows us to learn to cope but will never forget. The Lord will never give us more than we can handle and he is with us. I just know my grandson, Eli is in the perfect place waiting for me.
I completely agree with what you said about someone trying to help by asking you to tell them what you need. I recently experienced a trauma with my health and that happened to me and I didn't find that helpful. I'll continue to pray for you and your family. I'm truly so sorry for your suffering.
Baby Maggie will always be with you and part of your family. Grief doesn't have a time limit let yourself feel it . I am sending you a genuine hug.
God bless you and your family
Grief comes in waves and can be revisited even years later. Something as traumatic as losing a child certainly will make those waves much harder. I have worked in mental health for many years and have licensure in post partem depression.
I truly believe you can project your platform and assist others going through similar situations. You have a beautiful voice and let it be heard. It will also benefit you!
But I have to say anyone comfortable in doing a video in the bathroom and putting on makeup at the same time, has got herself in a good place. 😊🎉
Well said. Thank you for this heartfelt message. ❤
Distraction isn't a bad word when dealing with grief. You aren't saying you are forgetting your grief, just shifting your focus for the moment. Stay focused on what works for you and your family, you are doing amazing.
What sweet laughter from Violet. God bless you and your family may he fill you with peace and comfort.
What is it with wee babies laughing it is just adorable. I was pregnant when my dad passed away that will be 24 years ago then my young brother passed 14 years ago then my mum passed away 5 years ago. I have never grieved as I feel no-one wants to listen . Even my mental health nurse never came back lol I must have bored him to tears.Great video ❤
I'm so sorry 😢 (((( hugs)))))❤
You are so blessed to have such a supportive husband. I had 5 children under 10years old with a husband that was totally useless. I basically brought them up myself. My last baby was very demanding, couldn't put her down, wouldn't feed properly etc. Brought me to tears many times. With every child it was a learning curve as all babies are different. Now my children are all grown up and I now have 6 beautiful grandchildren aswell. Violet will bring you so much joy and love and the memories you make you will cherish for a lifetime
Lauren, I wanted to let you know how your experience has affected me. Every time I hear about or happen to see twins now, I always think about your family & your precious girls, Violet & Maggie. Also, I am the only girl in our family with 4 brothers! All my childhood memories have also resurfaced thinking of sweet Violet growing up with all those brothers! Needless to say it was challenging, but I wouldn't change it for the world. Sometimes though I wished they wouldn't have been so protective of me. But, I have grown to be a very independent woman and can do most anything on my own. I don't usually comment on videos, but I wanted you to know that even if you don't hear it, the telling of your story of your twin girls has positively affected more people than you know. Love to you & your beautiful family💗
Amazing insight, thank you. A friend told me that she hoped that soon I wouldn’t feel the need to talk about my daughter who passed 4 yrs ago. This taught me that my “friend” could not be trusted. You have gone through so much more than what you have shared with us. Magnolia is and always will be on your heart and mind and lips. As she should be. ❤
I appreciate this update. While you don't *owe* any of us an update, it really does make a difference to know how you/your family is really doing. Ive been holding the space for healing. I will continue to do so. Please know you are thought of and loved by strangers you will never meet. Take care of YOU and those you love.
You are all doing amazing 🙌🏻💕 the frames look beautiful and Violet is thriving 💕
I had to stop watching this multiple times. I lost my husband on Dec 23rd. It was unexpected. The grief is overwhelming, so overwhelming that I contemplated taking my own life. I am alone , navigating life alone again. I am thankful for my husky, he has kept me going. I have ok days and bad days but I still have to work and just function through life. You have a wonderful family. Thank you for sharing them.
Dear Kristina, I am so sad for you and also I am scared as my husband is sick. I thought to myself " why love? It hurts when we lose them. Then I think of the song: The Dance, by Garth Brooks. Grief is hard, somehow we get through it 1 day or minute at a time. TC 🙏
Very beautiful Frames on the wall 😢
I love red birds Very blessed family
Maggie would not want you to be sad ,she wants you n rest keep moving forward you don't have to forget her as she will always be with you n in your heart.your are strong you are beautiful n you can and are a great n wonderful person n a GREAT GREAT MOTHER daughter sister n WIFE
I have had many losses when it has came to babies. Now I have one forever baby, she’s two years old. My grief from those babies still come and go, even though it’s been a 11 year journey. This missing stage for those babies will be lifelong journeying thinking of where those babies will be in years. Sorry for rambling 😊. All my love ❤❤❤.
What you are saying resonates to my moma heart. I lost a son last year and the feelings pop up out of the blue 😢 without any warning as you say. Hold fast to your faith and your family, just live in the moment but don't stay there. Many prayers have been answered over the past year and I can now see the sunlight more clearly, not every day but most days. Hugs & Prayers for you and Mark 🙏 plus your beautiful children ❤
I agree grief does not have a time line, after 47 years I still feel grief.
Oh how adorable….Violet laughing at her brothers!! Lots of love to you and your amazing family!
That laugh had me 🥰
Love the 2 cardinal with a he magnolia photo.
Thank you Lauren for the beautiful and real life update. I so loved your insight that when life is hard, it’s not “bad” it’s just hard and we grow with that. I understand too that grief has no timeline, and personally I’m not sure grief is ever “over.” I wondered why after 14 years I still feel grief after losing my mom. It’s not over, I will always miss her. But as you so clearly know, life and its joys go on and those pictures of the impromptu birthday cake and Violet giggling is proof! Yes we can have fun moments alongside of tears. You are doing a great job with your family and yourself! Thank you again for sharing in such an honest, sensitive way 🌸💜
Mmmmm your beautiful sweetheart 💋😘 wow🌹
I love that laugh that it self make's me smile ❤😊
thank you for sharing, you are a great mom and Violet is such a sweet beautiful happy baby, It put a smile on my face seeing her respond to her brothers and hearing her laughs. I am very glad to see she is doing well and growing into her own person. She has such a sweet tender nature surrounding her. Take care of yourselves and have a safe and wonderful summer.
its hard to watch sad videos but i can see its helpful for you to do. we are here for you
Violet is beautiful baby girl ❤
My heart still breaks for you and your family, my parents/my family lost a baby girl at 18 months old of viral pneumonia, I didn’t know her, I was only 7 weeks old, but I hope to see her someday. ❤😢 stay well and congratulations on 80k.😊
You are such a wonderful mum wife friend and keep your chin up you are so blessed and you grief and don’t bottle it up as you have a most wonderful heart love watching your blogs and seen ing violet grow she she’s coming along way from the tiny little thing. She was to now and I love watching you please know that you loved and no I always say a prayer for you love kathy from Australia.
Thanks for the update….your journey will help many other mothers… my daughter had a 29 week premie who spent a long time in NICU, she is also tiny, now 3 1/2 and only 26 pounds…my daughter also exclusively pumped and she did supplement with formula ❤️ Violet is a treasure and surrounded by so much love, she may be small but she is mighty ❤
Hi Lauren❤, very nice vlog. I had 3 miscarriages many yrs ago. My 2nd miscarriage was traumatic, it was like giving birth. The Dr was so rude. I ended delivering at home. I had to put it in a jar until the weekend was over and I could see the dr in the office. Oh it was horrible. I thankfully got one of the other dr’s in the group whom I liked much better. He was kind and gentle. Now a days there are groups on you tube or people who have a you tube channel who can share their feelings and experience. I unfortunately did not have this. I’m well into my 60’s and do watch a lot of these channels. The one thing my Dr told me was when you think of everything that has to go right in a pregnancy; each cell going/ knowing where it needs to go you wonder why more women don’t have miscarriages. That stuck w/me all these yrs. The one thing that hurt and still does my aunt said “oh it was just a fetus😮”. To me at that time it was my baby. I saw it’s arms, legs, umbilical cord, that was a baby. I think because there no one talked about this you had to keep your feeling to yourselves and bottled up. I really suffered. God Bless you Lauren for being able to freely speak your feelings. It’s good to get it out. You are so right there is NO timeline for grief. I know how very hard it is for you. Seeing Violet (thank God she is doing so well) I’m sure you also see Maggie-that must be so difficult. There probably is a whole in your heart for Maggie. She is safe in God’s hands and an angel on Violet’s shoulder. Your so lucky you have such a wonderful loving family but they are also lucky to have such a loving caring and strong Mom. God Bless all of you. Sorry I rambled on. ❤❤gayle
I will never "get over" I lose of our first son i had a emergency c-section that was 43 years ago, grief has no time table. I get very emotional every time I see or hear about a baby passing. When you cry I cry we went on to have 6 pregnancy 2 live births and I thank God for them
Lauren you are such an amazing mom. You and your family have been through a lot. You are right grief doesn't have a time line. It is so nice the you have wonderful support to be able to talk when your not having a good day. I can't believe it is 6 months already. Violet is such a beautiful baby. I just love her giggles. The frames you picked out are so beautiful. You have a wonderful eye for detail. Take care. We are here for you. God Bless.
I find myself thinking of you often you and your husband have such a beautiful family time will help God bless to you all
What a beautiful and tender update. Grief is such an unpredictable ride. Thank you for sharing your experience and being honest with us. You are a blessing!
Thank you so much for sharing Lauren. We've been here watching you share your family and what you've been up to. I feel that you have been so strong and i'm happy that you know that grieving has no time limit. Everyone deals differently and on their own time hopefully. I'm glad that you have such a caring partner in Mark and that the boys help out. And i'm happy that you are not being too hard on yourself when it comes to working out. There has been so much that you has to deal with and ofcourse that take time away from other things. Matters of the heart are more important at all time. I just love that the boys are total goof balls to make Miss Violet laugh !! Much love always !!
Hi from Michigan love your shows. Lost my son at age 10 he was born 7-24-03 with a rare heart condition hpis.🌼 thoughts to your family
I lost my mom 9 years ago and my mom in law 2 years ago..grief never ends..you just learn to live with it and get through it every day and I understand about those triggers, I loved when you said that remembering their name and that they were here is so true.. grief is grief no matter what...sending you and Mark all my love prayers and support and blessings to your sweet Violet and your angel Maggie ❤❤❤
Violet and your boys are adorable.
The people who came and helped when my daughter died at 11 weeks old and paid respect to her and our very real grief and loss was so touching. I grieved for your tender heart and the loss your family will continue to face. Maggie is very much a member of your family.Because my daughter came to us through adoption I had one lady tell me she was not really mine I never spoke or acknowledge her again
I lost my twins at 12 weeks gestation it was a traumatic event. October will 2 years since the loss and there are still a lot of hard times. So i understand how you are feeling.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us
Violet's sweet laughing at the end was so precious
Beautiful.... hung them perfectly! Hugs and kisses to all!!! 🥰❤❤
When you lost baby maggie i shed a tear, my daughter then told me she was pregnant with twins i was so excited and a week later my grand daughter also said she was expecting twins double excitement🎉 but within 4 weeks due to complications we lost both sets of twins, they were due around my birthday which makes it hard and there have been lots of tears as you can imagine, but theyre young so maybe they will be given the chance of being mums again, 🙏🙏 maggie will never be forgotten❤❤
Grief is so interesting to me because one day you can be fine and then one small thing can break you but you have to push forward cause other family members need you. My mom gave birth to triplets ( i'm the only one that survived ) but it also was at such a difficult time [ there was a genocide happening at the time i was born too]. My mom also gets triggered when she sees triplets and I've noticed myself get sad as well because I have all these thoughts on how life would have been different with my two sisters. You and your family have gone through so much these past few months and I'm glad that you have so much support from your families/friends.
The cross stitch your sister did for you is so very special and beautiful.
Thank you for sharing your feelings on grief. I will choose my words and questions more carefully when dealing with someone grieving.
I think of your sweet little Magnolia every time I see a magnolia flower.
Sending you a healing hug, love and prayers. 🙏🏻💕
😂 The end of the video...Miss Violet made my heart sing! How glorious!!!💜
Thank you for sharing your journey. It is so helpful to others. Much love to you and your eternal family ❤
28:45 omg luna loves her Human baby sister, so smart and precious. Thank you Lauren, you and Mark have 6 Beautiful children one is in the arm's of the Angel's, but she Maggie will Alway's be watching over you all. Love you Lauren, Mark, boy's, Violet, Maggie and Luna. 💖💙💙💙💙💙💕🙏💋💋💋