THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES

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  • čas přidán 11. 11. 2018
  • MAG115 - Case #0070401 - Mikaele Salesa
    Statement regarding an antique meat grinder in their possession during the autumn of 1999.
    The Magnus Archives tells the tale of a familiar antiques dealer starting out in the trade and how a ship’s cook sometimes gets creative with supplies.
    Content Notes: Blood, body horror, cannibalism, masochism, self-harm
    Starring: The Archivist - Jonathan Sims; ‘Helen’ - Imogen Harris
    Writer: Jonathan Sims
    Director: Alexander J Newall
    Editors: Alexander J Newall, James Austin, Brock Winstead
    MERCH:
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    For more information or to hang out with the Rusty Quill community, visit:
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    FACEBOOK: therustyquill/
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    REDDIT: www.reddit.com/r/TheMagnusArchives/
    DISCORD: / discord
    EMAIL: mail@rustyquill.com
  • Zábava

Komentáře • 318

  • @theprideling
    @theprideling Před 3 lety +1300

    Gotta love Jon's dejected little sigh when he realized the knock was coming from a door that wasn't there before lmao

    • @alexismaeladera2490
      @alexismaeladera2490 Před rokem +78

      Yes, I like to think too that is the same door where Helen went through when she is taken by Michael

    • @avet9413
      @avet9413 Před rokem +54

      It hurts that it’s not Michael this time though. We’ll never see him again :(

    • @table2.0
      @table2.0 Před 9 měsíci +31

      @@avet9413he kersploded 😞😔

    • @ThatOneArchivist
      @ThatOneArchivist Před 6 měsíci +6

      I like to think he was just sighing and wondering if he is gonna get kidnapped *again*

    • @caramel9154
      @caramel9154 Před 6 měsíci +5

      @@table2.0 WAAHHHH MICHAEELLLL

  • @Gitskreig
    @Gitskreig Před 4 lety +1631

    Helen, what you are feeling is guilt. Welcome to humanity; it's going to be a rough ride.

    • @mimkyodar
      @mimkyodar Před 3 lety +88

      And we know we can trust The Distortion. it would never lie

    • @elvingearmasterirma7241
      @elvingearmasterirma7241 Před 2 lety +94

      Well it definitely was a sad door creak

    • @kaayya.k
      @kaayya.k Před rokem +29

      @cak01vej Just wanted to let you know that as a first time listener, I really appreciate you avoiding spoilers :)

  • @maryagrimm8412
    @maryagrimm8412 Před 4 lety +1574

    In addition to organizing hundreds of ghost stories, tracking down monsters, avoiding kidnapping, and stopping the apocalypse, Jon has to be therapist for random entities? That's rough

    • @dendakrmelova1201
      @dendakrmelova1201 Před 4 lety +176

      his power is literally being the therapist for random entities,,,jon would be a good therapist tho

    • @saucevc8353
      @saucevc8353 Před 3 lety +20

      Poor guy should therapist himself

    • @juliankohler5086
      @juliankohler5086 Před rokem +29

      He didn't care. It was begging for help and he turned it away. Disappointed.

    • @Idran
      @Idran Před rokem +8

      @@juliankohler5086 S5 spoilers
      I wonder a lot about what would have happened down the line if he hadn't. Was Helen always on that path, or could she have been pulled away?

    • @hamburgerdog25
      @hamburgerdog25 Před rokem +44

      Michael Crew: I can and will kill you if you ask about my scar
      Jon: whats up with the scar
      Michael Crew: well you see, it all began in my childhood...

  • @nicholaschaput9342
    @nicholaschaput9342 Před 4 lety +650

    Jon posting about this on AITA and getting torn apart

    • @dillpickle4784
      @dillpickle4784 Před 4 lety +68

      wMarche i just snorted beer out my nose and it really hurt and you are to blame

    • @FreshSqueezedSlugs
      @FreshSqueezedSlugs Před 3 lety +59

      @@dillpickle4784 Just made a man spit soda out of nose, reddit, AITA?

    • @mjamin9124
      @mjamin9124 Před rokem +8

      @@FreshSqueezedSlugs beer is just yeast soda

    • @subarachaos104
      @subarachaos104 Před 3 hodinami

      😂

  • @zuzannatasarz3756
    @zuzannatasarz3756 Před 4 lety +1114

    "My first job was with Jurgen Leitner", whoa, way to start with a bang.

  • @CallMeNIBS
    @CallMeNIBS Před 4 lety +1261

    "I just! Want! To feel! Better!" Oh Helen

    • @azulBjort_1406
      @azulBjort_1406 Před 2 lety +47

      Sad Hellen noises ☹️

    • @NaturallyCapricious
      @NaturallyCapricious Před rokem +47

      I felt so bad for her because there is zero chance in hell things are going to get any better for her if she is already disliking what she has to do now, she seems nice :(

  • @CallMeNIBS
    @CallMeNIBS Před 4 lety +931

    "self is difficult" boy oh boy it sure is

  • @margo1574
    @margo1574 Před 4 lety +924

    John.... You could've found a friend on their side....

    • @mimkyodar
      @mimkyodar Před 3 lety +30

      Yeah, Helen's a great friend.

    • @cinnamonwisp4207
      @cinnamonwisp4207 Před 3 lety +8

      Jon its jon

    • @Ghostrecall_M
      @Ghostrecall_M Před rokem +8

      @@mimkyodar Help, the hallway makes no sense and I can't leave.

    • @CryptedZoinkers
      @CryptedZoinkers Před měsícem

      ​​@@Ghostrecall_Myou're in a long hallway too?? I just see a lot of.. Squares and squiggles, like a child did it-

  • @TheJuliana0901
    @TheJuliana0901 Před 4 lety +1061

    helens voice sure is sounding a lot more.. michael-like than before

    • @savingplayer1613
      @savingplayer1613 Před 3 měsíci +14

      Maybe not? The real Michael's voice we heard talking to Gertrude sounded less distant, less spinning, but it was The Spiral that changed it. Maybe it's not Michael's malice changing her, but something different from The Spiral

  • @bowlerhatfilmsandreviews2778

    "God, do I miss being chased? That's depressing."
    That's the hardest I've ever laughed during this series

    • @whomstisthis
      @whomstisthis Před 11 měsíci +18

      Mine was either “FUCK you. I got eaten by WORMS because of you!” Or the exchange of “are you going to kill me..?” “nooOooOoOOOoo…. Well yes, but not for a good long while!”

  • @claude3429
    @claude3429 Před 4 lety +806

    Wow I feel so bad for Helen
    John just steam rolled that conversation down

    • @claude3429
      @claude3429 Před 7 měsíci +12

      Four years later, I wonder if Hellen would be any less insufferable had Jon tried to talk to it

  • @Companion92
    @Companion92 Před 4 lety +1021

    I get why people say, Jon should have teamed up with Helen, but I think he is just too overwelmed with everything at the moment to deal with it.

    • @eliwhite6159
      @eliwhite6159 Před 4 lety +165

      this whole season he got his ass kicked around by, what, 6, 7 avatars? and the distortion /was/ arguably the closest to actually killing him, so why would he trust it again, even if the avatar is different?

    • @pyrosianheir
      @pyrosianheir Před 3 lety +64

      Yeaaahhh.... If she'd come to him after things calmed down a bit more (big assumption on my part thinking that they would, but I'm allowed to maintain optimism on a first listen), maybe he'd have been more open to the possibility, but at this point, staring down the need to stop the Unknowing in the immediate future? No heckin' way.

    • @anthonybeervor2265
      @anthonybeervor2265 Před 3 lety +50

      It's funny reading these comments now. The spiral is not just the god of delusion, but also of gaslighting and false friendships.

  • @nanusantos1696
    @nanusantos1696 Před 3 lety +498

    It's interesting how The Distortion addresses Jon. There's a lot to unpack from that conversation, but, most importantly, it addresses him as The Archivist in a way that feels weird. Like, in the same way The Distortion isn't Helen even when it is, it feels like Jon isn't entirely Jon anymore.
    As if The Archivist wasn't just a title given by The Eye that allows you a certain power, but as if it was an actual entity existing within (or as) Jon.

    • @applesource8261
      @applesource8261 Před 2 lety +47

      I really hope that Jon doesnt turn out to be an entity. It feels more like the Archivist is the main Avatar of The Eye and therefore gets like a special rank even when being adressed by other avatars.

  • @comet8956
    @comet8956 Před 4 lety +1143

    i wonder if we’re technically a manifestation of the eye? we’re technically watching/listening to everything they record

    • @egg3255
      @egg3255 Před 4 lety +44

      maybe we’re the tapes

    • @Ben-vf5gk
      @Ben-vf5gk Před 4 lety +82

      I initially thought we were the next archivist but yeah

    • @hehehe88
      @hehehe88 Před 4 lety +89

      Feasible. I also thought about how if anyone goes inspired by this and starts writing horror stories, they effectively become entities to terrorize another perfectly good world.

    • @Em-ht3sp
      @Em-ht3sp Před 4 lety +49

      That's been my running theory too, I mean he needs to "feed us" new comfort, and tho I haven't been in the fanbase for long they seem to go nuts over every little bit of information they get

    • @FCHenchy
      @FCHenchy Před 4 lety +33

      I think this podcast is happening after the ritual of the Eye succeeds.

  • @ItsLifeOnEarth
    @ItsLifeOnEarth Před 3 lety +428

    Theoretically, that meat grinder could infinitely duplicate the human parts, thus producing the infinite amount of meat. That's a viable option when it comes to global food shortage!

    • @Idran
      @Idran Před rokem +19

      Taking...ah...production time into account, I dunno about viable for the entire planet :P

    • @hamburgerdog25
      @hamburgerdog25 Před rokem +12

      Go ahead and log off for me, pal, you're done.

    • @TonyToed
      @TonyToed Před rokem +10

      you could technically stop the heat death of the universe with that

    • @thedistinguished5255
      @thedistinguished5255 Před 9 měsíci +4

      everyone work out your right arm!

    • @Ceaseless_Watcher
      @Ceaseless_Watcher Před 2 měsíci

      There is no global food shortage. We just refuse to distribute it unprofitably. Even aid comes with interest. The only way a grinder would help is by feeding it capitalists.

  • @sling4425
    @sling4425 Před 4 lety +755

    I need helen and jon to be monster friends on god i need them to be friends OTL

    • @pianos4095
      @pianos4095 Před 4 lety +15

      I dont know what otl means but I agree VERY much

    • @koukonuts
      @koukonuts Před 4 lety +43

      @@pianos4095 OTL is an emoticon of a person kneeling in despair with their head bowed.

    • @pianos4095
      @pianos4095 Před 4 lety +15

      @@koukonuts oh!!!! Thank you!!!!!!!!!!

    • @koukonuts
      @koukonuts Před 4 lety +14

      @@pianos4095 no problem!

  • @samtigerlilly1003
    @samtigerlilly1003 Před 4 lety +1043

    He's FURIOUS at her, because he doesn't want to be like her. She-- they-- They are a dark mirror. Something thick with madness, but still being... themselves. He wants his choices to be his own, and she-they desperately want the same. But they-she are already lost. And the Archivist knows it (or, he thinks he does.) and when she basically said "I'm like you," John heard instead, "you're like me."
    With everyone he's trying to protect, everything he's trying to do Better, nothing makes him more FURIOUS then an entity telling him that he is a monster.
    Especially when their very nature is to deceive.
    Poor Helen. I think she was being genuine, but... sucks to be known as a lier.

    • @HyacinthoIgnis
      @HyacinthoIgnis Před 4 lety +114

      that, and after the whole sasha thing... i dont think he's taking lightly to being that are not those people just.. looking like those people. he gets so angry when Not Them mention sasha too

    • @wakipaki7381
      @wakipaki7381 Před 4 lety +29

      Spoilers:
      She does at least act like a help in later episodes, she defends and assists the Archive and even tries to offer friendship, in a genuine manner. Still not sure if an acts

    • @theprideling
      @theprideling Před 3 lety +32

      @@wakipaki7381 That's the thing about good liars and gaslighters. To a certain extent they believe their own lies, and in their own twisted way they try to take care of your, help you. Doesn't mean that it's good for you or that you should trust them. That's why Helen's so fascinating!

    • @ahuman3393
      @ahuman3393 Před 4 měsíci

      Actually great analysis, hadn’t thought of it from that angle yet

  • @anjazogovic591
    @anjazogovic591 Před 2 lety +181

    I really wouldn't antagonize the only borderline friendly creature I know if I were him

    • @jaxsonadros2066
      @jaxsonadros2066 Před rokem +28

      Regarding the Distortions domain of lying and gaslighting. Maybe being friends with a creature who is someone who tries to convince you your reality isn't real, is a bad idea considering it might be lulling you into a false sense of security to trick you into going into the door to eat you.

  • @suzerainty4192
    @suzerainty4192 Před 3 lety +174

    So this is the second time when someone really familiar with the entities says "I don't sleep well anyway" after agreeing to give a statement...I really need to know what the heck happens to people after they give their statements! I kinda brushed off the first time since the statement itself had to do with sleep disturbance but now it's obvious that something's up

    • @TheShadowlord18
      @TheShadowlord18 Před 3 lety +34

      If I had to guess, you might have the constant feeling of being watched whenever you go to sleep

    • @benjaminjenkins2384
      @benjaminjenkins2384 Před 8 měsíci +3

      Nightmares. For the rest of your life

  • @cantaloupegodling352
    @cantaloupegodling352 Před 5 měsíci +18

    The fact that Helen knocked before manifesting shows how drastically different they are to when they were Michael.

  • @halfchiangel88
    @halfchiangel88 Před 3 lety +188

    I would really like Jon and Helen to be monster friends, maybe cling to their humanity together

  • @solonserenity4067
    @solonserenity4067 Před 5 lety +284

    The Flesh is not a master I would want to serve...

    • @sarahdaydream9682
      @sarahdaydream9682 Před 4 lety +52

      Solon Deathguard Unless you were into vore

    • @TheJuliana0901
      @TheJuliana0901 Před 4 lety +25

      Sarah Daydream oh, fuck. the vore people are avatars. i swear to god if we get a statement of one of em

    • @mimkyodar
      @mimkyodar Před 4 lety +11

      Come on - all the bacon you could want? So much meat...

    • @silverquill101
      @silverquill101 Před 4 lety +28

      @@mimkyodar I have a headcannon that all true vegans/ vegetarians have encountered the Flesh in some way

    • @alchemicpunk1509
      @alchemicpunk1509 Před 3 lety +6

      I dunno, much like Nurglites in Warhammer 40k they seem to be perpetually happy and/or content with their lot and efforts.
      Though I'd probably prefer the Dark. It's cozy and cool without the sun.

  • @Min-ke6zc
    @Min-ke6zc Před 5 lety +205

    And there's one possible ally lost. :c

  • @DenjiAndromeda
    @DenjiAndromeda Před 4 lety +170

    I actually feel bad for Helen and kinda miss (?) Michael

    • @avet9413
      @avet9413 Před rokem +15

      I miss Michael so much :( It’s so sad how good people keep getting turned into Spiral monsters

  • @lorenam2430
    @lorenam2430 Před 3 lety +209

    Me, doing my usually half paying attention half drawing while listening: :)
    "I don’t speak any Croatian, but..."
    Head snaps up in a 'wha--' as I realise people remember my country exists. Hell-o one more unnerving aspect of The Flesh episode.

    • @kindasortanice3007
      @kindasortanice3007 Před 3 lety +11

      i had the exact same thing, i was falling alseep and i fully sat up from the shock lmao

    • @kiklonio
      @kiklonio Před 2 lety +11

      Gotta love that autocannibalistic cook representation

    • @kaiaellis976
      @kaiaellis976 Před rokem +13

      croatians and new zealanders can form a ‘usually unmentioned small country recognised by the Magnus archives in an episode about the flesh/cannibalism’ club

    • @ahminmiin
      @ahminmiin Před rokem +3

      had the exactly same reaction, i sad zamisljam cooka kao kanibalističkog špićeka

    • @lorenam2430
      @lorenam2430 Před rokem

      @@ahminmiin o moj boze, ne ŠPIĆEK 😂😂😂

  • @xiaocheng6643
    @xiaocheng6643 Před rokem +80

    I love how Jon has yet to realize how he's drawing in those entities one by one the stronger he becomes.
    First, The Web marked him as food as a child, but he escapes and now it's giving him small warnings and pointers whenever it can get away with it in The Eye's domain.
    After that, The Eye all but adopted him, doing everything to keep him alive and nurture his growth at this point. (Every time one of the recorders turns on, I imagine it sitting there, munching popcorn/new information in the background.)
    Then, when he sought out The Desolation and The Vast. Both wanted him gone at first, but after their agents gave their statements and admitted to feeling better after spilling their guts, they decided to let him go, minor shenanigans notwithstanding.
    And now, The Spiral of all things comes to him for advice on its newfound humanity, stating it never lied to him from the start and wouldn't dare to, which stands in complete contradiction with its nature.
    Makes one wonder if it's part of "The Watcher's Crown" in some way, which also raises the question why The Eye seems so intent on collecting statements from everyone Jon encounters and if the archives hold a similar function as the book that kept poor Gerard from finding his proper rest.

    • @NerveUnderscore
      @NerveUnderscore Před rokem +3

      Now I have questions and this is going to the archives of The Archive

    • @fauxclaws
      @fauxclaws Před 11 měsíci +1

      mark your spoilers ahhhhh, we havn't heard anything about jons childhood (edit: ignore me actually lol)

    • @burstingstitches
      @burstingstitches Před 11 měsíci +7

      @@fauxclawsi think you might have missed an earlier episode. The spider one towards the beginning of this season (episode 81 i think) was Jon giving a statement on his own first encounter with an entity (ie The Web) as a child

    • @fauxclaws
      @fauxclaws Před 11 měsíci +3

      @@burstingstitches ohhhh dang thanks a bunch. idk how that happened

  • @klltsun_2576
    @klltsun_2576 Před 4 lety +152

    Helen, poor Helen D:
    She doesn't have an anchor does she? To anchor her to humanity? She needs one, and it seems like she likes Jon...but Jon pushed her away

  • @thechevyferrari9559
    @thechevyferrari9559 Před 6 měsíci +16

    Can we have a Salesa spinoff that’s just about his adventures selling cursed objects and sailing around with his crew?

    • @subarachaos104
      @subarachaos104 Před 3 hodinami

      Honestly that would be neat for an animated series

  • @KenKen3593
    @KenKen3593 Před 2 lety +93

    Who is the best Magnus Archives character and why is it the nonbinary trickster monster suffering from dissociation?

  • @michaelrobinson996
    @michaelrobinson996 Před 2 lety +77

    Jon to Tim: I'm nothing like Elise!
    Jon here: If I got to please a meat God so be it.
    Jon 5 mins later: dam it Helen I'm nothing like you, you're just like Michael

  • @nicholaspalmer3826
    @nicholaspalmer3826 Před 4 lety +145

    Hunger unending,
    Why then is the plate empty?
    Fill it with yourself.

    • @BlueCat201X
      @BlueCat201X Před 3 lety +21

      The less body mass you have the less you have to eat to nourish it :)

    • @justeundonut-moi.7979
      @justeundonut-moi.7979 Před 3 lety +5

      @@BlueCat201X That's some cursed response 😭

  • @Cheshire5174
    @Cheshire5174 Před rokem +26

    when jon calms down, maybe he should think about the fact that this omnipotent entity who could kill him with ease did leave when he asked. it asked to talk. it could have forced him to. it didn't.

  • @drago1514
    @drago1514 Před 4 lety +111

    Oh I was just wondering when we'd see Helen again!! Too bad about what happened tho :(

  • @meloncaaat2050
    @meloncaaat2050 Před 3 lety +29

    The distortion, the embodiment of confusion is confused
    Also Jon rlly be telling demons to F off

  • @Jay-nx5ui
    @Jay-nx5ui Před 2 lety +27

    I really wish Jon had heard Helen out but i 100% Understand, 1. Hes really not the type of person to empathize/sympathise with someone he isnt extremely close to and 2. He's gotta be extremely overwhelmed with everything, the knowledge of Elias basically watching his every move, the end of the world essentially, Sasha's death, and so much more, he doesn't have the time to deal with Helens issues no matter how sincere they're being he has no reason to help them

  • @FCHenchy
    @FCHenchy Před 4 lety +42

    "Statement regarding an antique meat grinder" Well Find me in the Alps; this is going to be horrific.

  • @pianos4095
    @pianos4095 Před 4 lety +78

    I want to give helen a hug :(, it's ok sweetie your trying ur best there there it'll make sense eventually.... maybe..... ok let's not hope too much there actually but still!

    • @coreacartoonist
      @coreacartoonist Před 4 lety +10

      “Making sense” is probably impossible for a Spiral avatar sadly

  • @KemonoPriestessHazuki
    @KemonoPriestessHazuki Před 4 lety +114

    Had some spooks after hearing Jon say the words "deus ex machina" XD
    a [[[trope]]] that has been used to save his life many times.
    Count the Michael Crew situation and the "Michael" situation.

  • @jaderush4141
    @jaderush4141 Před 3 lety +47

    Oh, Jon. I think they were telling the truth. Oh no. I feel so bad for them. And for Michael. God, their voice sounds really similar to Michael's in this distorted sort of way, and now I miss them more. This is complicated.

  • @Things-with-wings
    @Things-with-wings Před 6 měsíci +6

    God.. I felt Jon’s comment about how he just felt like he was killing time, that he missed being chased, as weird as it is.
    When a lot goes on, it feels off when it finally stops, and you have time to breathe.

  • @IsaGh0st
    @IsaGh0st Před 3 lety +32

    i never want to hear Jon grumble "meaty bubbles" again

  • @sandymcneish7820
    @sandymcneish7820 Před 5 lety +78

    Awwwwwww poor Helen 😞

  • @aliyinn3186
    @aliyinn3186 Před 3 lety +33

    "So I suppose if it’s a statement you’re wanting… it’s no inconvenience to me. I don’t sleep well anyway."
    Oh so making a statement does disturb the statement givers sleep? Like last time with aderald dekker

    • @aliyinn3186
      @aliyinn3186 Před 3 lety +14

      Oooh also basira and daisy both had dreams and they both gave statements, but basira stopped having hers after she started working in the institute
      So martin and tim (and sasha :(( ) never had dreams because they already worked in the institute?
      Idk this might be minor or irrelevant but yeah

  • @HyacinthoIgnis
    @HyacinthoIgnis Před 4 lety +35

    the leg bit at the start, i'm sorry that i laughed at that
    poor helen :

  • @jmjw2004
    @jmjw2004 Před 4 lety +56

    an antique meat grinder?? homie what did you think was gonna happen?

  • @kait-o-vision
    @kait-o-vision Před 4 lety +74

    it's sad that I take a few days' break listening for Christmassy reasons and I come back to this and have this fond sort of, "aw" feeling when Jon goes off describing viscera

  • @pestilence.and.plague
    @pestilence.and.plague Před 2 lety +11

    Why do I find the Spiral kinda...endearing?

  • @cae2212
    @cae2212 Před 2 lety +12

    19:00 stop making me feel bad by closing the door with a slow sad squeaking sound !

  • @keychains9396
    @keychains9396 Před 4 lety +67

    worst decision ever- listening to this podcast while eating

  • @randigillespie9365
    @randigillespie9365 Před 3 lety +35

    He lashing out her most likely because he feels guilty about her fate. Guilt is probably blinding him to the fact that she is just as lost he is about what they are becoming. Jon being stuck in me vs. Them mind set isn't helping there are compromises for this types of situations but then again for some individuals it may just lead to a faster spiral. Honestly though in jon's situation I don't think I would have been able to ignore the obvious plea for help. I would have acknolodge that I wasnt in the right heads space at the moment "please wait a little later and see if I'm in a better mental space" I would then have her explain the whole 'being thing' maybe hearing and someone listen would help her recenter or adjust her self a bit better. Not to mention getting clarification on stuff from someone not out to get me.

  • @tani2575
    @tani2575 Před rokem +5

    Lmao The Distortion wanted a therapist I can't~

  • @ashcanicall5297
    @ashcanicall5297 Před 3 lety +23

    Did....did Helen always sound like a Michael-Basira lovechild before this episode or had I never noticed it before....

  • @schfuchs1
    @schfuchs1 Před rokem +7

    Listening to Helstortion (Helen & Distortion) trying to come to terms with what they have become made me a bit angry with Jon. They were trying to grasp the changes, and instead of listening, he lashed out in his own disgust for himself for his choices and changes. Change is difficult, and it's easy to slide to evil trying to do good.

    • @schfuchs1
      @schfuchs1 Před rokem

      All chefs align with the Slaughter, I'm convinced.

  • @sunshine_robo
    @sunshine_robo Před rokem +8

    I feel bad for Helen. It’s still like becoming more like the distortion but it’s still feeling human emotion like sadness or guilt I don’t know why I just feel bad for her. She’s still kind of human

  • @martinamakek9608
    @martinamakek9608 Před 4 lety +22

    Croatian listening here, dinner is called "vecera" - pronounced like "wetch her are"

  • @aw3707
    @aw3707 Před 4 lety +18

    jon this could've been a great partnership how dare you, poor helen ;;

  • @evagrev7351
    @evagrev7351 Před 2 lety +11

    My theory from this episode and what we know so far:
    I believe that was Salesa is talking about at the start of his statement is probably an incident where another assistant of Gertrude's got killed by the supernatural.
    As for Helen and the Spiral, I'm guessing the reason why the Spiral doesn't feel okay yet with Helen as its avatar is because the change of avatar from Michael to Helen was a necesity because Michael was no longer a proper fit because of his anger rather than the natural flow of things. Other than that, I think Michael was more "trustworthy" than Helen is, 'cause I feel like his clinginess to his anger is what made him more in contact with his human self and, since the Spiral didn't like that, that means it was something good for the humans and, specifically, John and the rest of the gang. While Helen is not like that, so she's more in contact with her Spiral side, thus she's more Spiral than she is Helen.

  • @midnights2631
    @midnights2631 Před rokem +8

    I love Distorted Helen. :D Better than old Helen.
    Monsters are now coming to Jon for therapy.

  • @bonniecornelius3836
    @bonniecornelius3836 Před 3 lety +43

    CLICK]
    ARCHIVIST
    Statement of Mikaele Salesa, regarding an antique meat grinder in his possession during the autumn of 1999. Original statement given January 4th 2007. Audio recording by Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London.
    Statement begins.
    ARCHIVIST (STATEMENT)
    So it’s another statement is it? Like I owe you something? Even though I warned you the handle might have splinters, that you should always be wearing gloves if you’re going to try firing it. And you knew where it was from, the signs of rage and violence to be watching for. So far, I don’t see how it’s my fault, and I don’t consider myself liable.
    That said, I don’t want you thinking I don’t appreciate you keeping it quiet. You all have been one of my most stable customers, and I’d hate to sour the business. So I suppose if it’s a statement you’re wanting… it’s no inconvenience to me. I don’t sleep well anyway.
    So what’s it going to be? Could go over what got me started in the business; that’s a story I haven’t told you yet. Though there’s less in the telling than you might expect. My first job was working with Jurgen Leitner, but I got out of that years before the man met his fate. Started looking for the exit about the time that I saw Warren get literally eaten by a book. And before you start cross-referencing, looking for some newly-birthed monster called Warren, I don’t mean eaten like that. It left behind the leg. Don’t know any transformations that leave behind your leg.
    So I gave Leitner my walking papers, and struck out on my own. I had no intention of following in his footsteps with the books, and when I began it was just normal, high-end antiques I was moving. Leitner’s client list, which I’d taken the liberty of copying, did me proud. The man had a knack for sniffing out moneyed fools with no sense of the value of things. Combine that with my own skill at evading a lot of the ‘legal entanglements’ the trade can get caught up in, and making money was not much of a challenge. Once or twice one of them would try to sell me a book, but when I learn a lesson, I learn it to my bones.
    After a while, some of those familiar with Leitner and his library approached me with some of the more… unusual items they had locked away. The sort of thing they’d have sold to him if they’d been bound in paper, rather than ceramic or wood. I didn’t want anything to do with them, not to begin with, but you’ve seen for yourself that the artefacts are not so volatile as the books, and they fetch a pretty penny, so eventually I started dealing in them as well.
    So there’s that. But I don’t think that’s the sort of statement you’re after is it? No. You want something a little ghoulish. Something to stick your teeth into. Fine. I’ve got one. You see, in this game there are a few rules it’s a good idea to keep to if you’re looking to stay alive. One of mine, is that only I take stock of the merchandise. You want to know how I came by this rule? I know you do.
    So there was a man worked on my ship. Let’s call him ‘Cook’. Not his real name of course, but real enough for this and, thinking about it, it’s unlikely he signed up with his real name anyway. Now, Cook, his main job was what you’d expect: working in the galley to keep my small crew fed. But on a ship like that, all of you pitch in all of the time, even me, and cooking a few meals a day doesn’t stop you having other duties. And one of those duties was checking on the cargo, making sure none of the breakables had managed to, wel , break. Any other crew I’d have been worried about theft, but I’d been with most of these for two or three years, so there was plenty of trust there.
    This must have been some time in September, back in ‘99, and for most of the journey Cook had been checking on the merchandise with no problem at all. But on the last week or so of that voyage, he’d been taking longer and longer, and it was starting to affect meal times, and so on one of those occasions I made my way down to check on him. And, of course, I found him staring into one of the boxes.
    The item in question that we were transporting for sale was an old antique meat grinder. The sort with a heavy vice you clamp on the table, and a nice big crank for twisting the screw, push the meat from the funnel along and into the mincer. It was a rusty old thing, all heavy iron and brand names worn away to nothing. If it wasn’t for the fact that it was near two hundred years old it would have been more valuable as scrap. Even with the age I wasn’t confident we could shift it. Without looking at my records, I couldn’t tell you where I picked it up, and I’m sure it wasn’t pointed out to me as one of the weirder items. No warnings or nothing like that.
    But Cook, he couldn’t get enough of it. He was staring at the thing, a look of longing in his eyes. With another decade under my belt, I now know how stupid my next action was, but I used to consider myself someone who looks after my crew, and Cook seemed real taken with the thing. I honestly wasn’t sure how well it was going to sell anyway, so I named a fair price and offered to take it out of his wages if he wanted to claim the grinder for his own. He said yes immediately, and was mighty thankful of my generosity. He grabbed the thing like it weighed nothing at all, which was the first clue I took proper notice of, and sprinted off to make lunch.
    That night dinner was hamburgers. I made a joke to Cook about him getting good use out of the meat grinder already, and he laughed, told me it was from frozen, but looking back now I don’t think he laughed as long or as hard as I might have liked. The meat was good, juicy, and honestly it didn’t taste as if it had been frozen at all. The sausages the next night were the same.
    Cook was different as well. Whenever I passed him I got a little bit of a smell. Like a raw steak just hitting the grill. Not an unpleasant smell, not at all, but certainly one I’d never noticed on him before. Occasionally, if he was wearing white, I could see small spots or smears of blood just at the edges. It might have been his own, working on a ship you get your share of cuts, but after a couple of days it became a little bit on the… unnerving side. He smiled more as well, and I’m not sure, but I feel like that might have been the thing that tipped me off the most that something was up with him. He’d never been the sort to… smile.
    The meaty dinners kept coming, and I began to wonder a bit about where he was getting it all. I talked to Leigh about it, who generally deals with supplies and acts as a sort of quartermaster, and she told me she’d definitely stocked up on plenty of canned and frozen meats for Cook before we set out, though only he’d been keeping track of what we actually had left. But it wasn’t that I thought he didn’t have the meat available, it’s that I just didn’t know how he seemed to make it all taste so fresh. By that point I was pretty much convinced that whatever was going on with Cook was outside the area of the natural, and that usually traced back to one of the items I was carrying for sale. The fact that I’d just given something to Cook, well it tracked too closely for me to not come to some… obvious conclusions.
    I started to avoid eating the meat I was served, kept my feeding to the small portion of vegetables that he’d add to the side, more a garnish than anything else. It didn’t escape my notice that Cook was also hiding increasing amounts of his arm inside his coat when he spoke to me. First fingers, then the hand, then final y he kept the whole forearm tucked under his jacket so I couldn’t get a decent look. When I thought about it I’d get visions of Cook slowly reaching in, cranking the handle wildly with the other arm, while he pushed his skin and flesh into the whirring iron, mouth open and smiling, as it began to come through the mincer grate like a string of meaty bubbles. It made me feel ill, but I just couldn’t get it out of my head.

    • @bonniecornelius3836
      @bonniecornelius3836 Před 3 lety +16

      So a few days out of port, I snuck into the galley when he wasn’t in. I mean, it was my ship, so I shouldn’t have felt like a thief sneaking around, but I did. Secured over the hobs was a bubbling pot of water that Cook was gradually turning into stock. At first I didn’t know what it was that made me so uncomfortable about the sight. Then I realised that he was making it the same way you make most meat stocks: he was boiling up some bones. And I am a hundred percent certain that Leigh did not supply us with bones, especially not the sort of bones I was seeing in that pot.
      The meat grinder was there, clamped onto the side, a ways away from the main counter, and with no sign that it had ever been used. But there was something to it that alarmed me. When it had been in the box it was old, rust creeping at the edges. Not something you’d want to put raw meat through. But now the thing was spotless, like new, and as I got closer that… same smell that wafted off Cook got stronger and stronger.
      Now I’m not one for hiding, or dodging a confrontation, but if this was happening like I thought, I really wanted to catch Cook in the act, see exactly what he was doing. So I went, and I waited until he was in the kitchen, preparing dinner, and I just walked in. Well, I tried to walk in, but Cook had locked the door. I had my own key of course, but I was also aware of how flimsy the lock was, so in the interest of time, I just kicked it open.
      In many ways, what I found in there was exactly what I expected, but in other ways… I don’t know. Cook did have his right arm up to the elbow in the mincer, his left hand working the crank, around and around. I could hear the sound of bone and flesh grinding, but there was nothing coming out the other end of the machine. Then I saw what was lying on the counter. It was his arm, neatly sliced off and butchered into cuts of meat, the bone shining white through the blood and dark skin. And I remembered he’d promised us pork chop tonight.
      Looking back at Cook, I saw the ecstasy on his face, with just a hint of manic terror, as he turned the crank, and a new arm came out, bit by bit, raw and glistening. It didn’t look like his old one, but there was a part of me sure it would taste just the same.
      It didn’t look like he’d even noticed me breaking through the door. He was wrapped up in his own sickness. So I walked over and grabbed him by the shoulder, screaming to know what the hell he thought he was doing. That snapped him out of it alright, and he lunged at me with a sudden cry, ripping the lower part of his arm back off, and leaving it sitting there, ragged in the grinder. His left hand went to the boiling stock, blistering and peeling as Cook reached in and pulled out one of the larger bones, swinging it wildly about the place. I don’t speak any Croatian, but given the way he was salivating I’m pretty sure he was chanting something about dinner.
      But in the end, he only had one arm, and wasn’t thinking properly. His movements were clumsy, like a drunk, and even at his best I’ve killed worse than Cook. He went down easy. That’s another good thing about having a crew you can trust. They tossed him overboard, and cleaned up without asking any sort of prying questions. Of course they belly-ached about another week on canned food, but I think they understood the alternative would have been worse.
      Story has a happy ending, though. I managed to sell the grinder to some rich Canadian gourmet, who I assume was bored of the standard options for his meals. Didn’t even have to leave anything out. Of course, he disappeared about a year later, and they never found the body. But there’s no way to prove that had anything to do with me. Besides, it’s not like he was paying me in instalments.
      ARCHIVIST
      Statements ends.
      [DEEP SIGH]
      I suppose in some ways it’s strange I’m not a vegetarian yet, what with everything I know. But… I rather think someone in my position has to take their small pleasures where they can, and if it occasionally delights some grotesque meat-god, well… c’est la vie.
      So Salesa was one of Leitner’s old assistants. That makes some sense, I suppose. The sort of small revelation that a month ago would have filled me with wild conjecture. Now it seems, I don’t know, almost trite. Filling in the puzzle, but not touching on those parts of the picture I still don’t understand.
      Maybe it’s not that. Maybe it’s just this… stillness, the anticipation. I - We know what’s happening, we know what we have to do about it, we even have something approaching a plan for once. And while it’s a welcome change not to be desperately praying for a deus ex machina, I don’t really know how to handle the waiting. Whatever Elias has Daisy doing, it seems to be working. Nothing’s made a move on me or the Institute since I returned, and last time I saw her there was the distinct smell of burnt plastic. So I suppose I’m safe. But everything just feels like… killing time, running down the clock. I don’t think I like it.
      God, do I - do I miss being chased? That’s depressing. No, it’s… I just miss feeling like I’m moving, like I -
      [KNOCK, KNOCK]
      [Calls] Come i-
      [KNOCK, KNOCK]
      [More sombrely] Come in.
      [A NEW DOOR CREAKS OPEN]
      [Sharply] What do you want?
      HELEN
      Not sure. To talk.
      ARCHIVIST
      You’re keeping her face, then.
      HELEN
      I am Helen.
      ARCHIVIST
      Don’t pretend to be people I know. Knew.
      HELEN
      I’m not pretending.
      ARCHIVIST
      You’re not Helen Richardson.
      HELEN
      I wasn’t Michael, either.
      ARCHIVIST
      Who do you see? When you, you look at yourself? There are mirrors in those corridors of yours. What do you see?
      HELEN
      I don’t.
      ARCHIVIST

      Why are you here?
      HELEN
      I… I’m not… I’m not entirely sure. I’m… having trouble. I don’t think I was meant to be Helen.
      ARCHIVIST
      I’m - I don’t understand.
      HELEN
      Neither do I. Michael was… pulling away. His anger was interfering. I don’t, I don’t think I have a choice but to be Helen. Self is difficult.
      ARCHIVIST
      Michael, he, uh, he, he wasn’t meant to be you either, though, was he?
      HELEN
      No.
      ARCHIVIST

      So…
      [Slowly] Why are you here?
      HELEN
      I took someone.
      ARCHIVIST
      You t-
      Wh… L-Like Michael ate you?
      HELEN
      I took a man, wandering the halls of an old tenement. He’s dead now, he never even came close to finding me. It was nourishing, but…
      ARCHIVIST
      But…
      HELEN
      I didn’t like it.
      ARCHIVIST
      You d- [Sigh] I’m not sure I follow.
      HELEN
      I feel… wrong. I feel this -
      ARCHIVIST
      [Angry] Why are you telling me this?!
      HELEN
      Something happened when I became ‘Helen’. She wasn’t right, she wasn’t ready.
      ARCHIVIST
      I don’t…
      HELEN
      Before, talking to you made Helen feel better.
      ARCHIVIST
      You’re not that Helen!
      HELEN
      I just want… I just want to feel better.
      ARCHIVIST

      I don’t believe you.
      HELEN
      You don’t?
      ARCHIVIST
      Wh-what? Why should I believe… a-a-any of this? You’ve told me over and over that you’re… what was the phrase? The ‘throat of delusion’? All of this is -
      HELEN
      I have never told you a lie, Archivist. I wouldn’t dare. I, I just thought you might understand.
      ARCHIVIST
      Uh… How could I possibly…
      HELEN
      We’re both changing, Archivist. I had hoped, that together -
      ARCHIVIST
      [Furious] Get out.
      HELEN
      Archivist…
      ARCHIVIST
      Get. Out.
      HELEN
      Fine.
      [A NEW DOOR CREAKS CLOSED]
      [DEEP SIGH]
      [CLICK]

    • @achnav3762
      @achnav3762 Před 3 lety

      Thanks 😉

  • @milfmacron
    @milfmacron Před rokem +4

    I'm loving the distortion they're amazing

  • @fauxclaws
    @fauxclaws Před 11 měsíci +4

    jon is helens unwilling therapist I love it. He was kinda mean to her but I can't really blame him

  • @AnanasVert
    @AnanasVert Před 2 lety +30

    At the word "meatgrinder" i got up to make some tea. This is going to be horrifying, isn't it?
    Edit: Yuuuuuup!
    Also, Helen!

    • @AJ-pq5zx
      @AJ-pq5zx Před 2 lety +10

      Very amused at the idea of someone going "oooh this is going to be grotesque, let's put on a cup of tea"

    • @AnanasVert
      @AnanasVert Před 2 lety +6

      @@AJ-pq5zx i swear im not martin in disguise *sweats*

    • @-S.L.
      @-S.L. Před 2 lety +2

      @@AnanasVert I mean that sounds exactly like something Martin would say, what with the whole "nooo Basira I wouldn't just stand there and offer Melanie tea - oh hey Melanie, would you like a, a, a cup of tea?" incident.

  • @elle8058
    @elle8058 Před 2 lety +8

    When u realise youre never gonna hear micheal again-

  • @SuperClass3000
    @SuperClass3000 Před 3 lety +6

    You learn things to your bones👀 .... Interesting word choice sir

  • @racoon_in_ankhmorpork
    @racoon_in_ankhmorpork Před rokem +8

    I think Jon should’ve let Helen talk. She seemed alright-what she was describing felt like guilt… I don’t think she meant harm, in fact she was probably telling the truth. But I understand why Jon wouldn’t want to be in her presence or sympathise with her, I guess. Maybe I’m just reaching for any proper alliance to another entity in the hopes that it might serve Jon well if everything goes wrong with the Unknowing…

  • @spiranomad
    @spiranomad Před rokem +4

    I feel like Jon should at least feel like he has an ally with Helen. Enemy of my enemy and all that.

  • @HelloThere-.-
    @HelloThere-.- Před 6 měsíci +5

    I wonder if The Spiral is supposed to be fear of madness and distortion of human mind, and the fears are able to adapt, than Helen may be somehow reflection of depression

  • @victory_snow8220
    @victory_snow8220 Před 3 lety +8

    I find it genuinely interesting the this "Hellin" doesn't enjoy what they are doing, unlike "Mighcle" did. I feel like this isn't the last of "Hellin" and I sure do hope that they team up in the future.

  • @Krosbryd
    @Krosbryd Před rokem +8

    Ya know, maybe I'm just weird, but I think this is the first statement dealing with The Flesh that doesn't make me lose my appetite. In fact, the anomalous meat sounds kinda appetizing :D

    • @WillTheForests
      @WillTheForests Před rokem +3

      No it’s not just you, honestly this may be a red flag, but flesh episodes almost always without fail make me hungry.

  • @io_online
    @io_online Před 2 lety +15

    Okay, completely get Jon's reaction here, I do, howeVER-
    JON COME ON DUDE TRY NOT TO MAKE ENIMES WHERE YOU COULD HAVE ALLIES (ish), JUST HAVE HER MAKE A STATEMENT AND LIKE, NOD IN AND UNDERSTANDING WAY OR SOMETHING. INFLUENCE HER TO BE GOOD (ish), COME ON

    • @-S.L.
      @-S.L. Před 2 lety +4

      yessss he missed an opportunity for a statement here! :( Could've helped Helen, assuming she isn't manipulating him.

  • @finallyfree1626
    @finallyfree1626 Před 4 lety +32

    I miss "Michael " : /

  • @AdamOfIngolstadt
    @AdamOfIngolstadt Před rokem +10

    Jon, every time he reads a horrific story about the consumption of human meat and the cruelness of slaughter houses: Damn that's fucked up, but everything is fucked up, so I'm gonna a hamburger✌

  • @toadstooldarling9937
    @toadstooldarling9937 Před 3 lety +20

    no one:
    me: *reads all the comments before the episode even begins*

    • @birdbrainiac
      @birdbrainiac Před 3 lety +1

      I read them after it ends. Don't you spoil the episode?

  • @_kai2702
    @_kai2702 Před 3 lety +6

    once again my live captions are a mess. thought "deus ex machina" was "sex mangus"

  • @waxingmoon2726
    @waxingmoon2726 Před 3 lety +5

    the original statement was given on my birthday :o!

  • @nateds7326
    @nateds7326 Před 2 lety +36

    "I saw me y freind Warren get literally eaten by a book. And before you cross refence to find a monster named warren, I don't mean eaten like that"
    Me: WAIT WHAT-
    "There was just a leg left"
    Me: oh ok good, that is way better than what I was thinking

  • @BlackReshiram
    @BlackReshiram Před 3 lety +7

    Damn poor Helen ... I feel bad for her cant believe it

  • @River_StGrey
    @River_StGrey Před rokem +10

    Jon: Do I miss being chased?
    Apologies, Jon, but it's the opposite.

    • @greyflash77
      @greyflash77 Před rokem +7

      Mate you can’t put “apologies” near the word jon anymore, almost had a mini heart attack

  • @wonderwhatsgonnahappen579
    @wonderwhatsgonnahappen579 Před měsícem +3

    Helen does not deserve to go through this madness

  • @aliyinn3186
    @aliyinn3186 Před 3 lety +5

    It’s missing micheal hours :(

  • @namaschu9418
    @namaschu9418 Před 3 lety +9

    * sad door noises *

  • @xemgnerx4769
    @xemgnerx4769 Před rokem +3

    Dude justice for Helen

  • @ollieri
    @ollieri Před 2 lety +6

    as a vegetarian, i dont think watching this while eating was a good idea lol.
    i dont usually mind this type of stories, but hearing this during dinner was... an experience

  • @RoseMultiverse
    @RoseMultiverse Před 4 lety +8

    poor Helen :(((

  • @katrinabohol3246
    @katrinabohol3246 Před 2 lety +3

    Helen!!! 😫 *grabby hands*

  • @alex6027
    @alex6027 Před 3 lety +4

    No, Jon! Don't be mean to Distortion!Helen

  • @Chipdrawz
    @Chipdrawz Před 2 měsíci +2

    I don’t think rejecting a monster going through puberty was the wisest choice jon could have made.

  • @erinbathie-moore8478
    @erinbathie-moore8478 Před 5 měsíci +2

    Poor Helen Distortion... I hope she feels better in her new Self soon. I hope she-they can become almost-friends with Jon :)

  • @savingplayer1613
    @savingplayer1613 Před 3 měsíci +4

    I know Jon has a lot going on right now, but that includes grappling with the fact that he's changing, and questioning his own humanity. Helen was doing the same!
    It should have at least piqued his interest that her transformation may be an unprecedented monster to human one!
    Idk Jon there's something important there.

  • @rosemarycat5
    @rosemarycat5 Před 3 lety +2

    This statement reminds me of the episode of Dollhouse "The Attic" with the man who "had to enjoy himself"

  • @najhoant
    @najhoant Před 3 lety +12

    Spoilers for Season Five:
    I want them to get Salesa's voice actor, Ray Chong Nee, to read this statement in character

  • @elliottgaylord6212
    @elliottgaylord6212 Před 3 lety +5

    Another reference to people who give statements having nightmares afterwards.... Wonder what that's all about

  • @Sxcheschka
    @Sxcheschka Před 3 lety +2

    ngl, the image of the meat grinder lowkey looks cool in my head.

  • @ginnytara2441
    @ginnytara2441 Před 10 dny

    "It's not like he was paying me in installments" omg i've never heard such a bonechilling line omg omg omg

  • @Im_Not_Loss
    @Im_Not_Loss Před 3 měsíci +1

    It’s gotten pretty obvious which fear is the monster of the week for each episode. I wonder what ever happened to that priest, maybe he was an avatar for the flesh… Or possibly something darker, that demon seemed powerful

  • @lilaboxx
    @lilaboxx Před 3 lety +4

    I feel really sorry for "Helen" to be honest

  • @a_jae_doe
    @a_jae_doe Před 10 měsíci +3

    Jon when faced with orsinov: for fucks sake not another murder get in line
    Jon whenever someone knocks on the door: fuck is the spider finally back to take me oh never mind its just another demon that's door related. If I had a nickle-

  • @bonsaigecko9153
    @bonsaigecko9153 Před 3 lety +5

    why do i eat breakfast during these

  • @marinterry3055
    @marinterry3055 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Don’t be mean to Distortion!Helen!!!

  • @coremagpie9221
    @coremagpie9221 Před 10 měsíci +1

    Helen! I love her so much!