3 Life Changing Ways to Move Through Shame

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  • čas přidán 5. 09. 2024
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    Not feeling good enough, loveable enough, worthy enough - i.e. Shame - is something we all struggle with at least sometimes. And when we experience shame it can be very debilitating and it can also cause us to act out in unhelpful ways - and that can sabotage our goals, dreams and/or relationships that can make us feel even more shame. Here I teach you 3 life changing ways to move through shame that you can start using today.
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Komentáře • 50

  • @dkdawe1
    @dkdawe1 Před rokem +2

    “When you’re down… are you going to kick yourself…. Or catch yourself”? Great perspective mindset question!

  • @rongike
    @rongike Před rokem +12

    I used to suffer from shame and embarrassment after practically every human interaction. but today I got on the wrong bus (I thought it was 28 but it was 20) and I realized it when I heard the end stop announced and then I stepped back off and reopened my umbrella in front of at least 20 people, and I felt nothing. past me would've died or even stayed on the wrong bus just to not have to get off (with ice cream melting in my bag moving in the wrong direction). so yeah it's definitely possible to overcome shame and embarrassment in most cases with inner work and being nice and compassionate with yourself.

  • @ChildofGod98765
    @ChildofGod98765 Před rokem +2

    Please pray for me and my children. I know sometimes , it may be hard to trust God’s plan but we must take comfort and have faith in him. We can’t place our faith in mortal things our trust should be for God alone. So I’m keeping faith. Since losing my job as a social worker at Forsyth Hospital I have been struggling financially. I lost my job because I declined the vaccine I declined due to my pre existing health condition lupus and heart disease. I was denied my medical/religious exemption. I’m waitressing and I’m so thankful to be working but I’m not making nearly enough to make ends meet. I have two beautiful boys both are autistic. My husband passed away years ago. I’m all alone. Each month is a struggle to not end up on the streets with my two boys. I’m constantly in fear of losing my home. But even as I face homelessness nearly every month. I have faith, God will provide. He has this far. He always shows up in the nick of time to perform miracles! With GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE when we put him first. I will continue to have faith that Our father will provide.

  • @narbox8438
    @narbox8438 Před rokem +8

    I bought your book in audio format. Thank for doing this. I do t talk much in your channel, but you have been helping get through some very dark times. I honestly don’t think I would be on this earth if it wasn’t for the path you guided me on

  • @chrisdigitalartist
    @chrisdigitalartist Před rokem +5

    ⚠️ Don't fall for that WhatsApp Spam comments⚠️
    I am sure you all know it is a spam/scam. That isn't Julia. Someone just stole her photo and is using it. I brought it up to her attention but not much we can do just keep reporting the spam comments.
    Take good care! 👍

  • @oliviag9271
    @oliviag9271 Před rokem +2

    Hello, my name is Olivia. Working on myself.thank you for your videos

  • @taraelmegreen5527
    @taraelmegreen5527 Před rokem +2

    It felt like at my darkest times u were the only friend I had. Your vpice is a reminder of how far I have come. Keep up the wisdom.....and ty, Blessings, Okie Girl🤠

  • @brendamaillet8052
    @brendamaillet8052 Před rokem +4

    Hello from NB Canada, I have watched all of your videos, thank you for your hard work! Shame is a hard one to deal with but we must stay strong.

  • @n8zdagreat
    @n8zdagreat Před rokem +2

    A lot of my shame comes from childhood and domestic and emotional violence between my parents in the home not to mention alcohol abuse by them. In adult life I still feel shame and less than in many ways

  • @StarVision8
    @StarVision8 Před 7 měsíci

    Thank you Julia❤

  • @robertduran3842
    @robertduran3842 Před rokem +1

    "Okay Self"..."Yeah, We luv Julia" 🤓. You are a rockstar of therapeutic Insight. Awesome sense of humor combined with a great mind. You make mindful wellbeing. Hot.

  • @larrycork1361
    @larrycork1361 Před rokem +1

    great insight

  • @AshLytton_JesusLovesYou

    I am a surviving shame! I am on my journey to overcome intimate shame and how to become a more warm and loving person! I have been shamed by parents, siblings, and past men about who I am! It has caused me to become a very cold individual!

  • @mohamedabdulkhadur6581
    @mohamedabdulkhadur6581 Před rokem +1

    Eventhough, my english is not perfect. I take advantage of your videos more than threpy, because you are always on point. I can listen every video all the day.

  • @lesliengo8347
    @lesliengo8347 Před rokem +1

    I post quotes on my Instagram stories weekly regarding emotional intelligence to help people realize that better is possible, and the lessons are stemed from you Julia.
    Thank you for all the work you do

  • @riturajmitra
    @riturajmitra Před rokem +2

    Thanks are lot for this video ❤️❤️❤️

  • @thomas4857
    @thomas4857 Před rokem +1

    Great podcast nothing to admitt im aware of every predicament im in an il come on top. Good enough

  • @flyingrhinofilms
    @flyingrhinofilms Před rokem +2

    I'm ordering your book next week. Your content never fails to hit the right spot with the right tone, always. I'm sure the book is going to be no different. I used to read a lot, but with everything being digital these days, it's been about 10 years since I've read a proper book cover to cover, so I'm looking forward to reading it 🙏

  • @bulbyfera
    @bulbyfera Před rokem

    Thank you for your videos.

  • @saghirahmad6300
    @saghirahmad6300 Před rokem +1

    very nice lecture.God bless you.

  • @jonr6680
    @jonr6680 Před rokem

    Been trying to watch your channel vids but rarely get to the end bc so many are really challenging...
    Sometimes I feel advisors on CZcams are just phoning it in, or don't have the life experience to understand or empathize with the problem they talk about.
    But not you. I think the reason I find your presentations so resonant is you are diving into the topic yourself, remembering or bringing to mind examples you have encountered or suffered.
    This video in particular makes me feel you are living the words you are speaking. Or maybe you are so good at expressive voice projection, thought flow. It makes me feel almost like you need help for a moment...then you pull back from the precipice with a professional solution... You can see why it feels like a rollercoaster!

  • @fathimohamed9322
    @fathimohamed9322 Před rokem

    This content was truly beneficial to me ❤️🙏

  • @chandrasekarramachandran3574

    Thanks
    Got the book

  • @bhanupriyapathuri9766
    @bhanupriyapathuri9766 Před rokem +1

    Hello julia please do a video on how to deal with persons who are OCD but dont agree that they are OCD

  • @crystalqueen8115
    @crystalqueen8115 Před rokem

    I’ve messed up a lot in school and I feel like I’ve made a bad reputation for myself. I feel like my peers avoid me more and feel uncomfortable around me as a “troublemaker” I guess. Idk if I’m just projecting though or being paranoid and shameful for past mistakes. I’m trying to allow myself to take up space and strive to do better in school. It’s a journey for sure and I have to be the one to cheer myself on and allow myself to move on past my mistakes.

  • @marilia0806
    @marilia0806 Před rokem

    This psychologist is the crème de la crème of the psychologists on CZcams.

  • @captaindan1000
    @captaindan1000 Před rokem

    This is one of the few videos that won't shame me for what I am. I can't help but like the irony of it. You tube and social media are not without their trolling and shaming.

  • @chrisdigitalartist
    @chrisdigitalartist Před rokem

    Hi Coach! Senior Shifter Chirs here!
    I was surprised to see posted this today and not Friday. Are you going back to Thursday?
    Thanks for this talk on shame. I really need to get more curious about my shame thoughts so I can keep working on moving and healing through it.

    Here are my notes:
    Shame are thoughts like "I am not good enough. I don't have what it takes. If people knew who I really was, they would reject me. They don't want to have nothing to do with me. There is something wrong with me. There is something broken in me. I am unworthy. I am not valuable. "
    All humans struggle with shame at least some of the time.
    How does shame feel in your body? Noticed the physical sensation in your body when you are feeling shame. (E.G…Hot feeling in the head, or warm sensation, tingling under armpits or foggy tunnel vision…)
    3 Life Changing Ways to Move Through Shame:

    1. Get Curious: Ask questions. What Happened? What created this shame? What did I do? What did someone say?
    Are there sensations coming up in the body? Where am I feeling that shame in the body?
    Sit in the discomfort to show that it isn't dangerous.

    2. What do I call this shame experience? (E.G….afraid? Embarrassed? Sad? Empty? Hopeless?)

    3. Notice what thoughts are going through your head: ("I am not good enough? I don't have what it takes. I am never going to get this right. I am never going to find someone. I am never going to have what I want…etc…")
    The antidote for shame is Self-compassion. ("It's understanding that you are feeling hurt or sad…etc…) Speak to yourself like you would as a good friend. Encourage yourself with love and understanding.
    Give yourself Self-Compassion instead of lashing out or avoiding. Move into the compassion for our feelings.
    To everyone and anyone reading this, remember always what worthy and value people you are! ❤

  • @dianetincher5596
    @dianetincher5596 Před rokem

    I love ❤️😻😍 this! This is so true! Thank you ❤️ for making this video! 👏❤️ Common humanity is such a powerful concept! Practicing it has changed my life!

  • @amandamariemuise
    @amandamariemuise Před rokem

    We feel something in our bodies. POW. I knew that but had never articulated it in my head. Feelings to me were emotions only. Seems obvious now. 😂

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Před rokem

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @yawboakye5804
    @yawboakye5804 Před rokem

    Hi I'm yaw and I'm new to your channel. I love it and its helping me through life. I was really insecure about myself than I put myself in counseling and I feel a lot better about myself. Your videos are helping me to do better and feel better about myself.

  • @jesusgal81
    @jesusgal81 Před rokem

    I am a therapist too, love your channel. :)

  • @norma7805
    @norma7805 Před rokem +1

    This video was helpful,thank you.

  • @denisesatt7044
    @denisesatt7044 Před rokem

    I look forward to step 2. Listening to your talks on video has been very helpful.

  • @Thisisnttravis
    @Thisisnttravis Před rokem

    Thanks Julia

  • @frankdelahue9761
    @frankdelahue9761 Před rokem

    Anthony Weiner knows everything about shame.

  • @bruceprigge5212
    @bruceprigge5212 Před rokem

    Thank you! 🙂

  • @RoadRunnergarage8570
    @RoadRunnergarage8570 Před rokem

    I have major issues with shame... I feel that I am invaluable because I no longer can build model cars because of a combination of Traumatic Brain Injury symptoms and very low self confidence and very low self esteem .. 😢!!

  • @Marekcatholic
    @Marekcatholic Před rokem

    I like the video. Feeling of freezing? yes, I had experienced it. Harsh inner critic? check too. One thing I dont agree with is doing mindfulness. Eastern spirituality?- no thank you. I did it for years. It was helping. However I came to the concllusion that it is against my religion. Now I say rosary instead :) God bless

  • @dadlord689
    @dadlord689 Před rokem

    I got hit with shame hard after failing quite a badly managed from beginning project. I truly thought it was easy and now I know that there are no easy projects. But I have gave up and quite and it almost killed a programmer in me. I don't even know how to code again.

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Před rokem

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @RoadRunnergarage8570
    @RoadRunnergarage8570 Před rokem

    I'm feeling very empty because I'm no longer able to build model cars because of TBI symptoms and low self confidence and low self esteem..

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Před rokem +1

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @RoadRunnergarage8570
    @RoadRunnergarage8570 Před rokem

    Maybe I was building model cars so people would be impressed with me rather than to build for myself??

  • @jenniferg6818
    @jenniferg6818 Před rokem

    I must be too triggered. All i hear is bad bad blah blah. Had to shut it off.