Thank you! I really appreciate that! We desire to always be loving and honest in the hopes that more people will remain open to consider hearing the warning and similarities in our stories. ❤️
this is such a necessary discussion … women are not only EXPECTED to tolerate their husband’s decision to masquerade as some kind of woman but ENTHUSIASTICALLY support it. Women can’t even object when the husband demands the kids call him “mom” without being called a transphobic bigot.
This is absolute nonsense, any transgender person would tell you part of coming out, is accepting that your partner, family and friends will very likely reject you and ghost you. Not undissimilar to any other person who is part of LGBTQ+ community, coming out requires the acknowledgement of the likely consequences and probably sacrifices this involves.
@@Emma-kz3zr you’re wrong, I experienced this first hand and every other woman I know whose husband claims to be a woman has had an identical experience (i have been in contact with at least 25).
@@dra2033 Here's a rule of thumb that I attempt to live by when presented with opinions; interrogating with “where did you get that idea? whom does it serve?”. My own experience and those experiences shared with me wildly differ to what you putting forward as a immutable fact.
@@Emma-kz3zr So by your reasoning, the truth is only truth when you say it? Your version of events cancels out every one else? You simply denying someone's experiences do not invalidate them pal lol. I have read Shannon Thrace's book, listened to hours of women and daughters experiences with the man in their lives that began to cross dress to what they believe was autogynephilia, which I appreciate is different from being transexual but when women mourn their husbands they are ridiculed I've seen it! The trans community does not like the coined term, trans widows because they exclaim that no one had died....and yet they go on about deadnaming lol.
Bullshit. Most partners leave. No one expects them to stay. If they choose to do so that is on them alone. If you stay and support you actually enable the delusion so you are not doing them any favour. She was too afraid of causing conflict to stand up to this nonsense. What surprises me is that she seems very much the opposite of the timid wallflower I expected. I feel bad that they went through this. It's a pity the delusion could not have been broken without such drastic and destructive actions. There is such terrible irony in having to be castrated in order to feel like a real man.
Wow, Valerie is amazing!! Such a beautiful golden soul! I'm enamoured by how she is able to string together such complicated and multifaceted emotional ideas with grace and flow. I think she is a feminine warrior and would make a great writer if she isn't one already. Thank you both so much for sharing!!!
LaRell what great fortune you had in happening to meet such a wonderfully perfect and amazing woman to join you on this journey of self discovery and healing!! She is just incredible. You are both awe inspiring 🌟🙏💕 I wish you both well in your life together ❣️
She is extremely intelligent. So curious about the sex life piece of this and it may be too personal but thinking of a straight woman engaging in a lesbian like relationship to then back to straight but not having the parts…wow I can’t imagine
I think they've been graciously candid enough by sharing such a deeply personal story that obviously has to carry a good deal of pain on both sides. And a lot of shame and regret on Larell's side. We don't need to know the intimate details of their sex life.
I guess she took her wedding vows seriously. I have the same question, was she just expected to switch to being a lesbian or at least people seeing from the outside would get that impression.
Yes 😔. I sadly allowed my self centered ness and my one tracked obsessive mind so fixated on the destination of becoming the woman I knew I had to be in order to align with how I felt inside, that I allowed myself to outright completely omit Valerie’s needs. She stopped doing the things for herself that she used to do, and turned that focus toward affirming my needs. She loves me so much that she wanted to support me in being who I felt I had to be not wanting to lose me, so in the process spent many years learning to step aside and west less nice clothes so I could shine in my pretty dresses. I was so grateful for her unconditional love and support of me wearing the clothes that made me feel so good and like myself at the time, and her incredible support even through surgery. But I allowed myself to be so focused on my happiness and joy of getting to have the surgery that made me so happy, that I pulled very far away from her in many ways, while also taking her feminine by forcing her undesired into more masculine roles that her divine feminine wasn’t aligning with. So then it turned out we were both trying to align with gender roles that don’t actually align with who we really are. Things work so much easier in a relationship when both partners feel safe to be who they really feel themselves to be. Despite the fact that my trans identity ended up changing, I was so grateful to be so seen and held in my female identity. Because I felt so safe, it allowed me to explore so much of my development, that I unraveled the parts of my childhood that made me feel like in order to be happy, I had to swim against the biological and social stream. Now that I love myself for who I was born as, I live such a far safer feeling, happier more confident life where I know people aren’t looking at me funny, and that when I present a business proposal to someone, they are far more likely to take it serious, and my marriage just works far better with more peace. I had to go through a lot of irreversible alterations to my poor body in order to learn these lessons, but now that I am here, I hope to tell my story in a way that it causes people to truly analyze whether permanent irreversible modifications to one’s body truly are the answer….or if resolving the traumas that caused the desire to do such a thing might perhaps lead to actual lasting happiness. It is hard to feel safe in the world when there are things about one’s own self that one hates.
It sounds like your deep awareness, spiritual and psychological training and devotion to healing the relationship is what got you through this experience. When you are evolved beings - any challenge can be used for lightness and expansion.😊
Thank you for recognizing that! We both come from backgrounds that perfectly prepared us to build a completely false sense of self that we then had to watch die, as we attempt to figure out how to build our relationship from scratch again. Like being in the middle of the desert unsure if you will ever see water again. We have indeed sought lots of spiritual experience in order to keep ourselves together through these rough waters.
thank you so much for speaking together infront of us all . This is deeply healing for me . I will watch it several times im sure . This is the first time iv seen a women speak openly about some of the things iv been through as the wife .
Look at what you have learned through this experience - true brilliance and insight. This was your true transformation. If there is a silver lining, your insights and new inner knowledge are gifts. Truly. Thank you for speaking out - for others to learn.
Im a trans guy and I’ve been watching your story because it kinda scares me a little bit. I started thinking, “Should I reconsider my bottom surgery? What if it doesn’t come out right and I regret it?” The thing is that I have never enjoyed my sexual life and I have never understood myself fully until now and I feel completely uncomfortable with what I have now, I want a metiodioplasty. Maybe your situation works because you found the right person to be by your side, I honestly enjoy being single and I have been divorced twice already and been traumatized by those relationships. I understand that maybe you regretted your transition and it’s different for trans women vs transguys but I don’t regret my transition at all, it’s made me so much happier. You’re message should be for the kids that want to transition, sadly, I wish I had transitioned as a kid and spend most of my childhood crying in silence and pretending to be happy 😵 But even though I felt so much emotional pain as a kid, I was supposed to go through it because adults shouldn’t sterilize kids, that is child abuse. This was the life I picked before my existence. I’m saying too much but I felt like I had to because there are so many trans people that are living their authentic lives, maybe stealth, that don’t advertise their lives on social media and just live normal lives. I could do that and not comment on your video but now that I’m about to listen to your wife’s side of the story, I can see how it’s all working out for you, you found the person that loves you above all things. The world is nothing but love, we are not our bodies and we are not even our minds but while we are living as humans, we must learn to adapt and be the best version of ourselves, in our authenticity. I have been watching the clown show that the whole “trans agenda” is bringing forth and I’m thinking that it’s fine for adults to do whatever they want but the kids should be left alone. I admire your resilience and I’m glad you’re still in this world to spread this message. You were supposed to have this experience in order to make a change in this world, and that’s what you’re doing. You have a beautiful union and are a very strong couple, this is the type of union everybody strives for because you are connected spiritually and that’s the ultimate goal, at least for me. I will watch all of your videos because your story breaks my heart but also scares me and I want to know that you are ok. Please don’t give up on life, it’s so beautiful and worth it. I wish you all the best in your beautiful union and that you stay together for the rest of your lives. This is what true love looks like and the ultimate couple goal. You two were meant to be together. With love and respect, Carter ❤
Hi Carter, please don't go through with it. Even if you don't enjoy sex now, you'll be in the same position, but with horrific medical problems too.... None of these surgeries are successful... Its mpossble to create functioning opposite genitals. You may develop an enjoyment of sex in the future.... Its mostly psycbgocal. I've had years with no sex drive, only for it to return. There are 1000s of regret storie s online. Others don't talk about it. Please watch them. God bless and keep you safe.
Great discussion. LaRell, I saw you recently on Benjamin Boyce's channel. It was nice to meet you there in chat and it's good to see you again. Thanks to both you and Valerie.
Hi! Thank you for listening! That was fun and interesting to get to interact with those of you watching the Benjamin Boyce interview as it was first playing. My hope is that my story, and the frequency of love with which I try to deliver it, may touch the hearts that perhaps may resonate with my story, so much that they allow themselves to consider the possibility that they may also be living with something that is likely to change, and therefore should perhaps reconsider making permanent changes to their body. And in this case, consider whether it is genuinely worth making those permanent physical changes when it devastates those who love you the most.
my transitioned ex gf asked if we could still be together as a couple. I couldn't. The person I saw in front of me was completely different from the one I wanted to be with. The one I loved was no longer... and grieving was hard. This person was someone foreign, psychologically, physically, spiritually. There was no connection keeping my interest to try to work it out. I was facing a teenager going through puberty for a while and then a man. The person I was sharing my life with for 12 years was well hidden, so well that I couldn't notice enough of remnant of the one I loved before. I still loved the woman.... wherever she disappeared to. She certainly wasn't anywhere around anymore.
I was wondering about your wife. I haven't watched this video yet. I'm about to. But regardless of what's in it , Your wife is amazing. Just seeing the pictures of you during all the before ,after and during transitions,you can see someone who loves you. My first husband was bi and I was fine with that. I'm bi also, he was also a cross dresser. He never claims to be trans ( I believe he just likes both and there is nothing wrong with that ) he is now married to another woman not so open and I feel sorry for him. It's really important to have that one person truly care , truly love you.
Simply said you are a very lucky man to have such a loving and understanding wife. But it still sadens me to know the other side of this whole confusion.
Yes, so very sad. If you want to hear more of her perspective and experience, we did an interview with Stephanie Winn and the You Must Be Some Kind Of Therapist podcast that is currently here on CZcams. My wife and I are actually working together to provide support and guidance to the partners of trans identifying individuals since my wife has training as a therapist and has been working amazingly with people for many years now, and now having gone through this experience herself and therefore gaining insight into the experience of the partners in trans relationships. And I am working on putting together presentations to share our experience and teach the concepts of developed identity in a way that allows people to hear my story and recognize how in their own lives they have been living based on a developed identity rather than who they want to be.
I have so much admiration for both of you. Thank you for speaking from the heart and telling the whole truth. We need to hear it more now than ever before.
Your wife is lovely and absolutely brilliant. I'm so impressed with her analysis on gender and relationships. Hearing her perspective has truly been a breath 💯 Balance is key. Gender norms have absolutely been weaponized and used as a tool of social control. We are on a spectrum. We must be in tune with one another in order to find the right frequency and social equilibrium. Connecting to self, nature, and one another and disconnecting from the social curriculum is the way out. Defining self within the confines of proposed identity types will lead to perversions of spiritual connection to self. The mutilation of the body to connect with the gender polarity system is hurtful. Your body is not wrong. Your mind is not wrong. Your DNA was not wrong. We need to tune in and love is the key. What is it that we are trying to convey through our expression of gender? Why do we need other people to validate our gender as if it should be relevant outside of very specific circumstances? The real issues of gender are in the areas of health and physical wellbeing.
Society loves to label everything and everyone. My husband has many “feminine” qualities about him. He is very sweet and caring and gentle. I have many “masculine” qualities. I can out belch any man. Does that make me any less female or my husband any less male? No! Everything that people have labeled overlaps. I have many chronic illnesses and mental illnesses that have the same symptoms. I also have many symptoms of other illnesses that I do not have. Just because someone has a “symptom,” doesn’t mean they have the “disease.” Society has gone overboard with telling people they have to be labeled. We are not labels! We are people. Unique to ourselves. Everyone wants to be in everyone’s business, caught up in labels. They tell people WHAT they are instead of WHO they are.
This conversation really shows how WOMEN are the ultimate selfless givers and protectors, showing it in softness and all the less material ways that society is yet to appreciate. Your wife is a QUEEN. But I must add to what your wife said about feminism: WOMEN WERE WORKING BEFORE, and they worked even more and harder than they do now, especially the peasant women who had no machines to help them. And yes, it was testosterone-driven (round-the-clock, daily cycle), because that's how our sun works ;), but women also have testosterone in their body. What feminism has changed is that it has pushed women to strive for financial independence, which has literally saved many women's lives. Let's not diss feminism. Not to mention that nowadays real feminists are really calling out the trans movement. I think spitting on feminism is just another agenda and people fall for it. It just shows that we are incapable of thinking critically: trends in thinking go in waves. You either have ultra left and then you go straight to patriarchal polarity and trad woman. All products of propaganda. I think the ultimate problem is that we, as humans, have limited our own ways of perceiving the world, that we go for intellectual understanding, which is by nature compartmentalising. A holistic view is to include the intellect with the emotions, instinct and intuition.
Your wife actually explained how the polarity is not a black and white concept, and how the maturation process is involved. And I actually believe that this is what trans movement is teaching humanity indirectly. It's teaching us to truly appreciate the femininity and masculinity but not in this 1D way.
You have an amazing wife. And you are both so right. I have noticed that in women, our natural softness and femininity are soo undervalued and even vilified today, but when a man transitions, he is celebrated for "imitating" those exact traits. That is so crazy!!! Thank you for sharing this
Both of you have such wonderful souls. This video, like many others I've watched on this channel, brought tears to my eyes from the first moments. The courage to discuss the things you've gone through is very touching and humbling to see. You are doing very important work with this channel and these videos. I hope you reach more viewers soon! All the best to you and your family, all the way from Finland!
Me and my husband have a wonderful relationship, I don't want to say to much but communication is key, no matter how uncomfortable it feels or the fear you have if you have the right person you can work though this, approach with love and openness. If things are going to fast speak up, if you need to be reassured say so! We are not mind readers. I think your relationship is wonderful and I really relate to the love you have for one another. It is beautiful to see and gives me hope that we are not alone. Best wishes for the future both of you. ❤
Much love to you and your family LeRell. My son at 13 decided he wanted to transition. I was fine with it but not ok with him taking hormones or changing the physical. Fortunately he is no longer asking to do that and realized he was not intrested in women in the he thought we wanted him to be. We love our son. I've never been on the "straight ". I am as well intersex. I celebrate my fem and male sides. Love yourself❤ We live in shells. These shells will pass.
Thank you both for sharing such a profound, raw and intimate conversation. Your willingness to share the insights you've both gained will certainly help others to better understand the motivations of some trans-feminine men and their female partners. Valerie's description of her reactions to LaRell going on female hormones is very interesting. She touches on her feelings about surgery when LaRell was about to undergo it, but doesn't describe her feelings to LaRell's body, post surgery. Since you are both so candid about your lives, I wonder if that might be something you would discuss in a future video. Best wishes to you both for future happiness. You are a beautiful couple, your respect and love for each other is inspiring.
Thank you! Yes, we could go on for hours and hours talking about all of the fascinating little intricacies of what such a situation followed by complete identity shifts can do to a relationship. It has been a path of constant learning and surrender to what is in order to see the gifts and blessings in the most extreme of grief and pain so that we can live happy connected lives despite the canyons of doubt and despair we have found ourselves in at times. We have a couple interviews coming up soon where we’ve both been asked to come on and share our story together. So we look forward to that.
So interesting that both society, and you, just accepted that men take and women give. I'm amazed she has stuck with you actually. Best of luck moving forward. Be aware though that again you are shaping your relationship even now, because you have detransitioned and there's a risk that it remains 'all about you'.
This was a refreshing look at a complicated subject. Thank you for your transparency. I have some trans people in my life. One is happily married and "passes" extremely well. I would never have known my friend's husband was born female. But some other folks I know~ there is a dissonance, a lack of congruency between their energy and how they are presenting themselves that has little to do with appearances. As I view life from a spiritual/energetic perspective, your experience and explanation of it make a lot of sense to me. Thank you for this enlightening video. And it is good to see a couple who has what it takes to do the work, supporting each other along the way in such a deeply committed and honest fashion.
Thank you! Yes we are very much spiritual and energetic and love to learn outside the typical boxes. And find it so fascinating when people want to tell us from within their tiny little limited boxes, how wrong we are for being who we are. And yes, no matter how happy a same sex, or trans couple may seem…and not saying there is anything wrong with love….there does exist a certain missing aspect on a more deep down level that many are not aware is so vital to a thriving relationship. There is a dynamic that simply cannot exist between two people of the same sex whether they were born that way or transitioned. It’s just how it is, and every relationship is different, but there are universal eternal laws of polarity that exist and must exist. For there to be light there must be dark. Hot must have cold. There is also a masculine and feminine polarity that is eternal and extends far beyond the physical. Far beyond man and woman. It is a polarity. And a very necessary polarity.
@@TheLaRell I am glad you are continuing to find your way to your own truth and sharing this with others! I definitely agree with much of what you and Valerie have put forward here. But we also may diverge in opinion. I do know many happy same-sex couples. I believe that the feminine and masculine (yin and yang) can come into very harmonious balance in a partnership if each individual’s energy opposes the other’s in a way that matches (meaning not the same as, but fitting like hand in glove or key in lock). I have seen hetero couples where the woman is yang and the man is more yin; they are each expressing themselves authentically and are an energetic match with each other. I am so disheartened that the whole trans thing is mainly so focused on the physical, on superficial qualities like hair, and wardrobe, etc. I am of the belief that one should be able to express one’s feminine and masculine qualities freely, unconstrained by societal norms. If you're a man and you want to wear a dress, go for it! But why the need to pretend you're a woman? Enjoy the look and feel of the dress! Certainly, we don't live in a world that condones this, so instead, the alternative is surgery. It's madness. I think if we raised our children to know they were free to explore and express their yin and yang, then many many fewer children and adults would seek to transition.
I really appreciate the level of honesty with which you both share your thoughts & feelings. I hope I'll one day find a partner with whom I can find the same level of trust, honesty & communication you seem to have. I'm very interested in (and horrified by) the trans issue, and have been watching & reading a huge amount about it. My ex sadly transitioned (ftm) mostly after we broke up - it still feels surreal to me, actually. Athough we are not in touch I still care about her, grieve for her and hope that she would come to her senses about it one day. Although it's nowhere near the experience of actually being with someone who is transitioning, it still feels lonely & sad because there are so few people I can talk honestly about my thoughts and feelings about her transition, or the whole trans agenda for that matter. Anyway, I wish you all the best in the future!
Was really hoping to hear about this side of things but didn't want to pry. So very glad you stand together, spiritually love is the most important Truth there is on this crazy journey
beautiful human beings! thanks for sharing your experience and feelings ...at the end, we are spiritual beings having this human experiencie on earth ..so I think that "tragedies and traumas" can be the perfect path to expand our consciousness as you transmit that you are doing ....stay strong and peaceful ..lots of love!
This is interesting. I have never internalized this idea of a “lesbian relationship”. Perhaps because I don’t “believe” my partner is a woman, it feels like I’m also being forced to fake being in a lesbian relationship (because I am). I feel like I’m lying every day. The fakeness is unbearable at times.
What a special couple❤ love your honesty..Its been difficult for you both, but here you are closer than ever..Move forward now darlings, you both deserve happiness..love & hugs 😘🫂
Its just such a pity this mans mother ruined his life. I suppose his dad failed him too because he did not stand up to his mother. Bad parents really fuck up their kids heads. I actually think a spouse should not support transitioners. Seems at lot like enabling abherant behaviour in my view.
This conversation is missing the God factor, this is more than polarity it’s is knowing your creator and the fear of God as being the beginning of wisdom.
We have a relationship with God that exceeds that of most because we have experienced what it is like to live life with no belief in God. We now have a very special relationship and understanding of God that greatly surpasses the limited views of most. We are intentional not to mention God a lot in our messages however because it can become very divisive very quickly. Personal beliefs are something that people feel very protective of. And I will not push my beliefs on others, but will carefully weave in the truths of God.
@@TheLaRellYou have excellent instincts. I detest religion, and any discussion of magical beings will tune me out immediately. Most agnostics and atheists are like me. Just leave your magic skyport beliefs out of it, and I’ll watch all day.
@@alijane6675 Exactly! 😊. Beliefs in Gods and deities and things vary so drastically and are used so much to fuel separation and division. And I am all about love and compassion and seeing the person beneath the beliefs. And yes, when I am trying to get my message heard, I’m going to use non Divisive language.
@@TheLaRell I’d hate for your very essential voice to be drowned out by Christian rhetoric. Your message will get lost. I’m very glad you’re aware, and post mindfully. More reasons you’ll find success quickly on this app.
@TheLaRell I am with you. By speaking to your audience without religion aspect is important. I to, am a Christian. It, I don't use social media to put forth my beliefs. Others may, but I believe how you live and act towards others should reflect your Christ like character. Your family is in my prayers though.😉 Take care!
I first thought I'd argue with you, since being a lesbian (and really not that spiritual) I honestly didn't get the polarity thing. But I ended up understanding your point, for me it's about the balance of an individual relationship. With us, it's heavily on the feminine side (I'm talking stereotypical behaviour, I'm not talking hair or makeup), and if one of us decided to transition or just start acting in a more "masculine" way I don't know if the relationship would endure that.
Yeah it can be easy for this message about polarity in relationship to really be taken wrong and turned into some 50’s male dominance and submissive wife nonsense. But when you take a step back and look at the big picture and the fact that we have always existed as humans with a very clear difference between men and women, there has always existed a certain polarity. And we like to think that in a relationship we can be completely “equal” on every level. But relationship tends to not flow so well when we don’t feel “safe” to fall into a more natural polarity. This polarity can indeed exists in same sex couples, and we have seen it naturally manifest in one person being more masculine and one more feminine in these relationships. So the weirdness that comes up in a trans relationship like mine and my wife’s, is that both of us were trying to be the feminine, but because I needed so much recognition and affirmation of my gender expression and identity, she felt the need to fall to the sidelines and be less in her feminine, and the result was chaos. Her feeling constantly un wanted. Unattractive, not feeling confident to dress nicely or wear nice makeup and things as if by doing so she was stealing my show. She felt the need to take in a lot of the things in our relationship that typically would be more up my alley as the man. And it just turned our relationship upside down in many ways. Now that I’m back to my man identity, she has been able to drop more into her feminine identity, and suddenly so many things just seem to flow better. ❤️❤️❤️
LaRell sorry I am going to be brutally honest. Your whole demeanor and words about Valerie look and sound like you are starstruck. I think you let yourself be blown away by her words and discourse, whose substance I fail to find. Polarity, polarity, polarity... The honest truth is: she is as 'guilty' as you are about your transition. It is not a loving thing to have let you go all the way with your delusion. You said you insisted about it, probably demanded it. Her role as your loving spouse was to say: no f.... way. Wishing you both all the best.
Okay. Have you ever known an addict? Have you ever been in a relationship with someone that had an addiction, or some unrelenting desire to do something and you found yourself in a position of either having to leave them or love them through whatever it is they are doing that you don't like? Sure it may be easy for you to say that my wife should have just put her foot down and said no. I think you are failing to realize the magnitude of the situation. I was ready to kill myself if I did not have the surgery. My wife had no choice but to go along with it....or leave me. She didn't want to leave me, and therefore did the next best thing. Loved me through it. It sounds to me like you see love differently. Perhaps you would leave your partner if you didn't like something they were doing. Love is stronger than that. While to you it might seem ludicrous for my wife to stay with me or support me through this, you are not her. You do not have the life experience that she does. You do not know what kind of love we actually possess. You watch a video and see the tiny little glimpse into our personal life that it portrays and you seem to make conclusions based on that. You say I seemed "Starstruck" by her. Ummm....I would sure as fuck hope so! She is my incredible wife and I am extremely lucky that she DID stay with me through all of this nonsense. I've been with her for 9 years now! She is an incredible person! And the fact that she stayed with me through this does not make her a bad person or "guilty" as if I committed some crime that she was a part of. If anything it shows how incredible she really is that she could clearly see past something that it seems you would not be able to. Every single one of us is a walking program. We are the product of every experience we have ever had, and in any given moment are making decisions based on all available information and how we currently interpret that information from our life experience driven perspectives. Therefore, my wife just the same as me, found herself thrust into a situation that she was an unwilling party to....but because she did not want to "lose" me, she had no choice but to go along with what I did. The other option would have been to leave me....or for me to leave her if she wasn't going to go along with what I felt I HAD to do at the time. So it may be easy for those on the outside to say things like "I would have left him if that was me in her shoes!" The cool thing is, it's NOT anyone else BUT her in her shoes, and therefore no one has any say in the matter.
@@TheLaRellthat's exactly how I see things. I'm currently going through watching the person I love struggle with addiction. And, I am an unwilling party but i love him more than anything and I know he will get better. I struggled with addiction and he loved me through it as well in the past. What your wife went through sounds so identical to watching the person you love struggle with an addiction.
Your wife sounds lovely. I just wish she would speak to ordinary people. He language and expression is so complex that I will have to stop listening to the video now. It might be better if you tell her story in your words.
My gf and I love our relationship dynamic which is androgynous Feminine tf4f or f4tf. I still cultivate select 'masculine' qualities such as chivalry because of my greater physical strength and love for the Divine Feminine.
I doubt she loves it quite as much as you do. I can practically guarantee it. No young woman or girl ever, when dreaming of meeting the man of her dreams.... Imagined him wearing a dress! She's tolerating and settling. No matter how much she tells herself differently cos of woke peer pressure. Maybe you're truly confused... Or have you manipulated a situation that serves your AGP fetish?
@@mementomori4840”polarity is maturity, in order to have that normal masculine/feminine energy”……what? What does that even mean? Damsel in distress is hiding in our lineages? What? This is a lot of verbal diarrhea
We very much recognize that even is same sex marriages…there must be a polarity. The relationship will never thrive is both partners are taking in the feminine or if both are taking on the masculine.
@@Emma-kz3zr even if it’s not readily apparent, the polarity exists if the relationship is working good. 😊 This is simply the rule of nature and it is an eternal rule that we are subject to whether we like it or not. We as humans tend to think we get to control such things, but we are actually subject to these rules of nature.
@@TheLaRell it is also possible (probable even) that polarities will shift throughout a lifetime with an intimate partner as life circumstances change, and demand different qualities from us. This is quite apparent in long term relationships. We see it all the time in couples, both straight and gay, in eldercare.
Around the 8th week sexual development starts, out of a split forms a penis & is why mtf trans operations r just fold n cut & ftm is cut a arm or other thing. We all have male & fe hormones. There r different reasons ppl become trans. Some have hormone & developmental issues in the womb. I understand yours too. One is also molestation as a child, another is social contagion & trendy & there’s more. She’s very psychological.
Do you think trans/gender dysphoria is a mental illness? I feel like it is. I don't say this as an insult in any way, I have dreadful anxiety myself so I understand how awful it is when there are all these thoughts in my head saying I'm not good enough and giving me feelings of constant distress and fear. Seems to me like gender dysphoria is a kinda similar thing, disordered thoughts in your head telling you you are the wrong gender ?? I just wonder if people could be given more mental health help then many people with gender dysphoria might not get to the point where they actually try to change their gender.
From México city I admire you you look so hansom beautyful. Smile Jesús gave you believe It or not Jesús crist Made a miracle on you keep on telling the true God do not make mistakes you aré so cute frome inside and outside AND you do look like a men
You shold spend rest of your life worshipping your wife believe me you are one lucky lucky man much more than u know sorry for coise of words English is not my language but i hope u anderstend what i mean
What are they trying to say "universal laws of polarity" like what does it mean, all I hear is unscientific word diarrhea. This is extremely hard to listen to...
Two amazing ppl🤍🤍. You can tell you’ve put a lot of work into your relationship….I never would’ve thought about the polarity issue, very fascinating. Thank u for the education…such a good parallel of couples dealing with addiction.
Yes I was always so fascinated with addiction and actually studied it relentlessly recognizing that it’s based in exactly the same concepts which is complex trauma and trying to escape the overwhelming sense of pain and numbness in the body due to trauma different people choose different ways to avoid the pain and suffering and different circumstances lead to different flavors of poison you enjoy the most.
Society loves to label everything and everyone. My husband has many “feminine” qualities about him. He is very sweet and caring and gentle. I have many “masculine” qualities. I can out belch any man. Does that make me any less female or my husband any less male? No! Everything that people have labeled overlaps. I have many chronic illnesses and mental illnesses that have the same symptoms. I also have many symptoms of other illnesses that I do not have. Just because someone has a “symptom,” doesn’t mean they have the “disease.” Society has gone overboard with telling people they have to be labeled. We are not labels! We are people. Unique to ourselves. Everyone wants to be in everyone’s business, caught up in labels. They tell people WHAT they are instead of WHO they are.
You lucked out many women wouldn't have stayed. She really loves you
She might be stuck.
@@merg-vh5sx or he may be. Or they both are just where they need to be.
@@Gingerblaze AGPs are narcissists. It's possible she's one too I guess.
It's a soul love they have for each other.
Not lucky, blessed!
You are both lovely people. Your gentle, honesty was a pleasure to hear. Wishing you continued health, healing, and love!
Thank you! I really appreciate that! We desire to always be loving and honest in the hopes that more people will remain open to consider hearing the warning and similarities in our stories. ❤️
Amen to this !!!!
this is such a necessary discussion … women are not only EXPECTED to tolerate their husband’s decision to masquerade as some kind of woman but ENTHUSIASTICALLY support it. Women can’t even object when the husband demands the kids call him “mom” without being called a transphobic bigot.
This is absolute nonsense, any transgender person would tell you part of coming out, is accepting that your partner, family and friends will very likely reject you and ghost you.
Not undissimilar to any other person who is part of LGBTQ+ community, coming out requires the acknowledgement of the likely consequences and probably sacrifices this involves.
@@Emma-kz3zr you’re wrong, I experienced this first hand and every other woman I know whose husband claims to be a woman has had an identical experience (i have been in contact with at least 25).
@@dra2033
Here's a rule of thumb that I attempt to live by when presented with opinions;
interrogating with “where did you get that idea? whom does it serve?”.
My own experience and those experiences shared with me wildly differ to what you putting forward as a immutable fact.
@@Emma-kz3zr So by your reasoning, the truth is only truth when you say it? Your version of events cancels out every one else? You simply denying someone's experiences do not invalidate them pal lol. I have read Shannon Thrace's book, listened to hours of women and daughters experiences with the man in their lives that began to cross dress to what they believe was autogynephilia, which I appreciate is different from being transexual but when women mourn their husbands they are ridiculed I've seen it! The trans community does not like the coined term, trans widows because they exclaim that no one had died....and yet they go on about deadnaming lol.
Bullshit. Most partners leave. No one expects them to stay. If they choose to do so that is on them alone. If you stay and support you actually enable the delusion so you are not doing them any favour. She was too afraid of causing conflict to stand up to this nonsense. What surprises me is that she seems very much the opposite of the timid wallflower I expected.
I feel bad that they went through this. It's a pity the delusion could not have been broken without such drastic and destructive actions. There is such terrible irony in having to be castrated in order to feel like a real man.
Wow, Valerie is amazing!! Such a beautiful golden soul! I'm enamoured by how she is able to string together such complicated and multifaceted emotional ideas with grace and flow. I think she is a feminine warrior and would make a great writer if she isn't one already. Thank you both so much for sharing!!!
“Golden soul” is right!
LaRell what great fortune you had in happening to meet such a wonderfully perfect and amazing woman to join you on this journey of self discovery and healing!! She is just incredible. You are both awe inspiring 🌟🙏💕 I wish you both well in your life together ❣️
She is extremely intelligent. So curious about the sex life piece of this and it may be too personal but thinking of a straight woman engaging in a lesbian like relationship to then back to straight but not having the parts…wow I can’t imagine
I think they've been graciously candid enough by sharing such a deeply personal story that obviously has to carry a good deal of pain on both sides. And a lot of shame and regret on Larell's side. We don't need to know the intimate details of their sex life.
@@purplespaceship2417 ya I said I was curious. I didn’t ask or demand them tell me 🙄
@@LP-km7gji feel the same, just curiosity
I guess she took her wedding vows seriously. I have the same question, was she just expected to switch to being a lesbian or at least people seeing from the outside would get that impression.
@@amandachrome9310same
Very touching and emotional video, well done. When we transition, our partner is the most forgotten person who suffers the most sadly.
Yes 😔. I sadly allowed my self centered ness and my one tracked obsessive mind so fixated on the destination of becoming the woman I knew I had to be in order to align with how I felt inside, that I allowed myself to outright completely omit Valerie’s needs. She stopped doing the things for herself that she used to do, and turned that focus toward affirming my needs. She loves me so much that she wanted to support me in being who I felt I had to be not wanting to lose me, so in the process spent many years learning to step aside and west less nice clothes so I could shine in my pretty dresses. I was so grateful for her unconditional love and support of me wearing the clothes that made me feel so good and like myself at the time, and her incredible support even through surgery. But I allowed myself to be so focused on my happiness and joy of getting to have the surgery that made me so happy, that I pulled very far away from her in many ways, while also taking her feminine by forcing her undesired into more masculine roles that her divine feminine wasn’t aligning with. So then it turned out we were both trying to align with gender roles that don’t actually align with who we really are. Things work so much easier in a relationship when both partners feel safe to be who they really feel themselves to be. Despite the fact that my trans identity ended up changing, I was so grateful to be so seen and held in my female identity. Because I felt so safe, it allowed me to explore so much of my development, that I unraveled the parts of my childhood that made me feel like in order to be happy, I had to swim against the biological and social stream. Now that I love myself for who I was born as, I live such a far safer feeling, happier more confident life where I know people aren’t looking at me funny, and that when I present a business proposal to someone, they are far more likely to take it serious, and my marriage just works far better with more peace. I had to go through a lot of irreversible alterations to my poor body in order to learn these lessons, but now that I am here, I hope to tell my story in a way that it causes people to truly analyze whether permanent irreversible modifications to one’s body truly are the answer….or if resolving the traumas that caused the desire to do such a thing might perhaps lead to actual lasting happiness. It is hard to feel safe in the world when there are things about one’s own self that one hates.
Children as well. However, men suppressing and hiding this situation is also not good.
It sounds like your deep awareness, spiritual and psychological training and devotion to healing the relationship is what got you through this experience. When you are evolved beings - any challenge can be used for lightness and expansion.😊
Thank you for recognizing that! We both come from backgrounds that perfectly prepared us to build a completely false sense of self that we then had to watch die, as we attempt to figure out how to build our relationship from scratch again. Like being in the middle of the desert unsure if you will ever see water again. We have indeed sought lots of spiritual experience in order to keep ourselves together through these rough waters.
You are very fortunate to have such an amazing wife, very glad to see you both are in a good place and united!
thank you so much for speaking together infront of us all . This is deeply healing for me . I will watch it several times im sure . This is the first time iv seen a women speak openly about some of the things iv been through as the wife .
You both are so articulate. I love how you listen, feed of each other, and are gentle.
Look at what you have learned through this experience - true brilliance and insight. This was your true transformation. If there is a silver lining, your insights and new inner knowledge are gifts. Truly. Thank you for speaking out - for others to learn.
Im a trans guy and I’ve been watching your story because it kinda scares me a little bit. I started thinking, “Should I reconsider my bottom surgery? What if it doesn’t come out right and I regret it?”
The thing is that I have never enjoyed my sexual life and I have never understood myself fully until now and I feel completely uncomfortable with what I have now, I want a metiodioplasty.
Maybe your situation works because you found the right person to be by your side, I honestly enjoy being single and I have been divorced twice already and been traumatized by those relationships.
I understand that maybe you regretted your transition and it’s different for trans women vs transguys but I don’t regret my transition at all, it’s made me so much happier.
You’re message should be for the kids that want to transition, sadly, I wish I had transitioned as a kid and spend most of my childhood crying in silence and pretending to be happy 😵
But even though I felt so much emotional pain as a kid, I was supposed to go through it because adults shouldn’t sterilize kids, that is child abuse. This was the life I picked before my existence.
I’m saying too much but I felt like I had to because there are so many trans people that are living their authentic lives, maybe stealth, that don’t advertise their lives on social media and just live normal lives.
I could do that and not comment on your video but now that I’m about to listen to your wife’s side of the story, I can see how it’s all working out for you, you found the person that loves you above all things.
The world is nothing but love, we are not our bodies and we are not even our minds but while we are living as humans, we must learn to adapt and be the best version of ourselves, in our authenticity.
I have been watching the clown show that the whole “trans agenda” is bringing forth and I’m thinking that it’s fine for adults to do whatever they want but the kids should be left alone.
I admire your resilience and I’m glad you’re still in this world to spread this message. You were supposed to have this experience in order to make a change in this world, and that’s what you’re doing.
You have a beautiful union and are a very strong couple, this is the type of union everybody strives for because you are connected spiritually and that’s the ultimate goal, at least for me.
I will watch all of your videos because your story breaks my heart but also scares me and I want to know that you are ok. Please don’t give up on life, it’s so beautiful and worth it.
I wish you all the best in your beautiful union and that you stay together for the rest of your lives. This is what true love looks like and the ultimate couple goal. You two were meant to be together.
With love and respect,
Carter ❤
Hi Carter, please don't go through with it. Even if you don't enjoy sex now, you'll be in the same position, but with horrific medical problems too.... None of these surgeries are successful... Its mpossble to create functioning opposite genitals.
You may develop an enjoyment of sex in the future.... Its mostly psycbgocal. I've had years with no sex drive, only for it to return.
There are 1000s of regret storie s online. Others don't talk about it.
Please watch them.
God bless and keep you safe.
Great discussion. LaRell, I saw you recently on Benjamin Boyce's channel. It was nice to meet you there in chat and it's good to see you again. Thanks to both you and Valerie.
Hi! Thank you for listening! That was fun and interesting to get to interact with those of you watching the Benjamin Boyce interview as it was first playing. My hope is that my story, and the frequency of love with which I try to deliver it, may touch the hearts that perhaps may resonate with my story, so much that they allow themselves to consider the possibility that they may also be living with something that is likely to change, and therefore should perhaps reconsider making permanent changes to their body. And in this case, consider whether it is genuinely worth making those permanent physical changes when it devastates those who love you the most.
This woman for World leader❤!!!! Such a Super being❤!
my transitioned ex gf asked if we could still be together as a couple. I couldn't. The person I saw in front of me was completely different from the one I wanted to be with. The one I loved was no longer... and grieving was hard. This person was someone foreign, psychologically, physically, spiritually. There was no connection keeping my interest to try to work it out. I was facing a teenager going through puberty for a while and then a man. The person I was sharing my life with for 12 years was well hidden, so well that I couldn't notice enough of remnant of the one I loved before. I still loved the woman.... wherever she disappeared to. She certainly wasn't anywhere around anymore.
I was wondering about your wife. I haven't watched this video yet. I'm about to. But regardless of what's in it , Your wife is amazing. Just seeing the pictures of you during all the before ,after and during transitions,you can see someone who loves you. My first husband was bi and I was fine with that. I'm bi also, he was also a cross dresser. He never claims to be trans ( I believe he just likes both and there is nothing wrong with that ) he is now married to another woman not so open and I feel sorry for him. It's really important to have that one person truly care , truly love you.
Simply said you are a very lucky man to have such a loving and understanding wife. But it still sadens me to know the other side of this whole confusion.
Yes, so very sad. If you want to hear more of her perspective and experience, we did an interview with Stephanie Winn and the You Must Be Some Kind Of Therapist podcast that is currently here on CZcams. My wife and I are actually working together to provide support and guidance to the partners of trans identifying individuals since my wife has training as a therapist and has been working amazingly with people for many years now, and now having gone through this experience herself and therefore gaining insight into the experience of the partners in trans relationships. And I am working on putting together presentations to share our experience and teach the concepts of developed identity in a way that allows people to hear my story and recognize how in their own lives they have been living based on a developed identity rather than who they want to be.
I have so much admiration for both of you. Thank you for speaking from the heart and telling the whole truth. We need to hear it more now than ever before.
Your wife is lovely and absolutely brilliant. I'm so impressed with her analysis on gender and relationships. Hearing her perspective has truly been a breath 💯 Balance is key. Gender norms have absolutely been weaponized and used as a tool of social control. We are on a spectrum. We must be in tune with one another in order to find the right frequency and social equilibrium. Connecting to self, nature, and one another and disconnecting from the social curriculum is the way out. Defining self within the confines of proposed identity types will lead to perversions of spiritual connection to self. The mutilation of the body to connect with the gender polarity system is hurtful. Your body is not wrong. Your mind is not wrong. Your DNA was not wrong. We need to tune in and love is the key. What is it that we are trying to convey through our expression of gender? Why do we need other people to validate our gender as if it should be relevant outside of very specific circumstances? The real issues of gender are in the areas of health and physical wellbeing.
You are so very lucky to have found true love many of us never have and probably never will find it . I am so happy for you and your lovely family ❤
Society loves to label everything and everyone. My husband has many “feminine” qualities about him. He is very sweet and caring and gentle. I have many “masculine” qualities. I can out belch any man. Does that make me any less female or my husband any less male? No! Everything that people have labeled overlaps. I have many chronic illnesses and mental illnesses that have the same symptoms. I also have many symptoms of other illnesses that I do not have. Just because someone has a “symptom,” doesn’t mean they have the “disease.” Society has gone overboard with telling people they have to be labeled. We are not labels! We are people. Unique to ourselves. Everyone wants to be in everyone’s business, caught up in labels. They tell people WHAT they are instead of WHO they are.
I love that your dog always has a gripe to be very vocal about 😂
The barking is background music at this point 🩶
This conversation really shows how WOMEN are the ultimate selfless givers and protectors, showing it in softness and all the less material ways that society is yet to appreciate.
Your wife is a QUEEN.
But I must add to what your wife said about feminism: WOMEN WERE WORKING BEFORE, and they worked even more and harder than they do now, especially the peasant women who had no machines to help them. And yes, it was testosterone-driven (round-the-clock, daily cycle), because that's how our sun works ;), but women also have testosterone in their body. What feminism has changed is that it has pushed women to strive for financial independence, which has literally saved many women's lives. Let's not diss feminism. Not to mention that nowadays real feminists are really calling out the trans movement. I think spitting on feminism is just another agenda and people fall for it. It just shows that we are incapable of thinking critically: trends in thinking go in waves. You either have ultra left and then you go straight to patriarchal polarity and trad woman. All products of propaganda. I think the ultimate problem is that we, as humans, have limited our own ways of perceiving the world, that we go for intellectual understanding, which is by nature compartmentalising. A holistic view is to include the intellect with the emotions, instinct and intuition.
Your wife actually explained how the polarity is not a black and white concept, and how the maturation process is involved. And I actually believe that this is what trans movement is teaching humanity indirectly. It's teaching us to truly appreciate the femininity and masculinity but not in this 1D way.
Nicely said. Sadly, there are a lot of folks today (I am pointing no fingers) who don't understand the meaning of the word "feminism".
I enjoyed listening to your woman. Amazing. She has so much womb gnosis, wisdom, really inspiring.
You have an amazing wife. And you are both so right. I have noticed that in women, our natural softness and femininity are soo undervalued and even vilified today, but when a man transitions, he is celebrated for "imitating" those exact traits. That is so crazy!!! Thank you for sharing this
Both of you have such wonderful souls. This video, like many others I've watched on this channel, brought tears to my eyes from the first moments. The courage to discuss the things you've gone through is very touching and humbling to see. You are doing very important work with this channel and these videos. I hope you reach more viewers soon!
All the best to you and your family, all the way from Finland!
Thank you so much! 🥰🥲
Me and my husband have a wonderful relationship, I don't want to say to much but communication is key, no matter how uncomfortable it feels or the fear you have if you have the right person you can work though this, approach with love and openness. If things are going to fast speak up, if you need to be reassured say so! We are not mind readers. I think your relationship is wonderful and I really relate to the love you have for one another. It is beautiful to see and gives me hope that we are not alone. Best wishes for the future both of you. ❤
Trials and tribulations of life. You are overcomers and great inspiration. Thank you for sharing your stories. 💞
Much love to you and your family LeRell. My son at 13 decided he wanted to transition. I was fine with it but not ok with him taking hormones or changing the physical. Fortunately he is no longer asking to do that and realized he was not intrested in women in the he thought we wanted him to be. We love our son. I've never been on the "straight ". I am as well intersex. I celebrate my fem and male sides. Love yourself❤ We live in shells. These shells will pass.
Thank you both for sharing such a profound, raw and intimate conversation. Your willingness to share the insights you've both gained will certainly help others to better understand the motivations of some trans-feminine men and their female partners. Valerie's description of her reactions to LaRell going on female hormones is very interesting. She touches on her feelings about surgery when LaRell was about to undergo it, but doesn't describe her feelings to LaRell's body, post surgery. Since you are both so candid about your lives, I wonder if that might be something you would discuss in a future video. Best wishes to you both for future happiness. You are a beautiful couple, your respect and love for each other is inspiring.
Thank you! Yes, we could go on for hours and hours talking about all of the fascinating little intricacies of what such a situation followed by complete identity shifts can do to a relationship. It has been a path of constant learning and surrender to what is in order to see the gifts and blessings in the most extreme of grief and pain so that we can live happy connected lives despite the canyons of doubt and despair we have found ourselves in at times. We have a couple interviews coming up soon where we’ve both been asked to come on and share our story together. So we look forward to that.
absolutely thanks for helping see what others may be interested in understanding ❤
So interesting that both society, and you, just accepted that men take and women give. I'm amazed she has stuck with you actually. Best of luck moving forward.
Be aware though that again you are shaping your relationship even now, because you have detransitioned and there's a risk that it remains 'all about you'.
This was a refreshing look at a complicated subject. Thank you for your transparency.
I have some trans people in my life. One is happily married and "passes" extremely well. I would never have known my friend's husband was born female. But some other folks I know~ there is a dissonance, a lack of congruency between their energy and how they are presenting themselves that has little to do with appearances. As I view life from a spiritual/energetic perspective, your experience and explanation of it make a lot of sense to me. Thank you for this enlightening video. And it is good to see a couple who has what it takes to do the work, supporting each other along the way in such a deeply committed and honest fashion.
Thank you! Yes we are very much spiritual and energetic and love to learn outside the typical boxes. And find it so fascinating when people want to tell us from within their tiny little limited boxes, how wrong we are for being who we are. And yes, no matter how happy a same sex, or trans couple may seem…and not saying there is anything wrong with love….there does exist a certain missing aspect on a more deep down level that many are not aware is so vital to a thriving relationship. There is a dynamic that simply cannot exist between two people of the same sex whether they were born that way or transitioned. It’s just how it is, and every relationship is different, but there are universal eternal laws of polarity that exist and must exist. For there to be light there must be dark. Hot must have cold. There is also a masculine and feminine polarity that is eternal and extends far beyond the physical. Far beyond man and woman. It is a polarity. And a very necessary polarity.
@@TheLaRell I am glad you are continuing to find your way to your own truth and sharing this with others!
I definitely agree with much of what you and Valerie have put forward here. But we also may diverge in opinion. I do know many happy same-sex couples. I believe that the feminine and masculine (yin and yang) can come into very harmonious balance in a partnership if each individual’s energy opposes the other’s in a way that matches (meaning not the same as, but fitting like hand in glove or key in lock). I have seen hetero couples where the woman is yang and the man is more yin; they are each expressing themselves authentically and are an energetic match with each other.
I am so disheartened that the whole trans thing is mainly so focused on the physical, on superficial qualities like hair, and wardrobe, etc. I am of the belief that one should be able to express one’s feminine and masculine qualities freely, unconstrained by societal norms. If you're a man and you want to wear a dress, go for it! But why the need to pretend you're a woman? Enjoy the look and feel of the dress! Certainly, we don't live in a world that condones this, so instead, the alternative is surgery. It's madness. I think if we raised our children to know they were free to explore and express their yin and yang, then many many fewer children and adults would seek to transition.
I really appreciate the level of honesty with which you both share your thoughts & feelings. I hope I'll one day find a partner with whom I can find the same level of trust, honesty & communication you seem to have. I'm very interested in (and horrified by) the trans issue, and have been watching & reading a huge amount about it. My ex sadly transitioned (ftm) mostly after we broke up - it still feels surreal to me, actually. Athough we are not in touch I still care about her, grieve for her and hope that she would come to her senses about it one day. Although it's nowhere near the experience of actually being with someone who is transitioning, it still feels lonely & sad because there are so few people I can talk honestly about my thoughts and feelings about her transition, or the whole trans agenda for that matter. Anyway, I wish you all the best in the future!
Have known many such couples and I found there are addictive and codependent qualities.
Ooooft the anti feminism rhetoric came out of nowhere there. Eeek feminism does not judge stay at home mothers, it's their own choice. 😮
I’ve learned with YT to expect to be disappointed.😒
It depends if it's liberal feminists or actual feminism.
Was really hoping to hear about this side of things but didn't want to pry. So very glad you stand together, spiritually love is the most important Truth there is on this crazy journey
beautiful human beings! thanks for sharing your experience and feelings ...at the end, we are spiritual beings having this human experiencie on earth ..so I think that "tragedies and traumas" can be the perfect path to expand our consciousness as you transmit that you are doing ....stay strong and peaceful ..lots of love!
What a phenomenal love story. 💕
This is interesting. I have never internalized this idea of a “lesbian relationship”. Perhaps because I don’t “believe” my partner is a woman, it feels like I’m also being forced to fake being in a lesbian relationship (because I am). I feel like I’m lying every day. The fakeness is unbearable at times.
Then, don't do it. Your soul is telling you it's not right.
What a special couple❤ love your honesty..Its been difficult for you both, but here you are closer than ever..Move forward now darlings, you both deserve happiness..love & hugs 😘🫂
Tough conversation.
Proud of you guys
Shes wonderful!
Your wife is incredible ❤
My beautiful christian husband, whom I adored, divorced me to become a woman. It didn't work so well for him
you are so blessed with your beautiful wife that truly loves you😀
Universal Principles. Superior terms for Divine enlightenment.
Can you share about your Dr Joe Dispenza experience? Was it helpful in your healing and self discovery ?
Its just such a pity this mans mother ruined his life. I suppose his dad failed him too because he did not stand up to his mother. Bad parents really fuck up their kids heads.
I actually think a spouse should not support transitioners. Seems at lot like enabling abherant behaviour in my view.
What a lovely couple you are!
This conversation is missing the God factor, this is more than polarity it’s is knowing your creator and the fear of God as being the beginning of wisdom.
We have a relationship with God that exceeds that of most because we have experienced what it is like to live life with no belief in God. We now have a very special relationship and understanding of God that greatly surpasses the limited views of most. We are intentional not to mention God a lot in our messages however because it can become very divisive very quickly. Personal beliefs are something that people feel very protective of. And I will not push my beliefs on others, but will carefully weave in the truths of God.
@@TheLaRellYou have excellent instincts. I detest religion, and any discussion of magical beings will tune me out immediately. Most agnostics and atheists are like me. Just leave your magic skyport beliefs out of it, and I’ll watch all day.
@@alijane6675 Exactly! 😊. Beliefs in Gods and deities and things vary so drastically and are used so much to fuel separation and division. And I am all about love and compassion and seeing the person beneath the beliefs. And yes, when I am trying to get my message heard, I’m going to use non
Divisive language.
@@TheLaRell I’d hate for your very essential voice to be drowned out by Christian rhetoric. Your message will get lost. I’m very glad you’re aware, and post mindfully. More reasons you’ll find success quickly on this app.
@TheLaRell I am with you. By speaking to your audience without religion aspect is important. I to, am a Christian. It, I don't use social media to put forth my beliefs. Others may, but I believe how you live and act towards others should reflect your Christ like character. Your family is in my prayers though.😉 Take care!
I first thought I'd argue with you, since being a lesbian (and really not that spiritual) I honestly didn't get the polarity thing. But I ended up understanding your point, for me it's about the balance of an individual relationship. With us, it's heavily on the feminine side (I'm talking stereotypical behaviour, I'm not talking hair or makeup), and if one of us decided to transition or just start acting in a more "masculine" way I don't know if the relationship would endure that.
Yeah it can be easy for this message about polarity in relationship to really be taken wrong and turned into some 50’s male dominance and submissive wife nonsense. But when you take a step back and look at the big picture and the fact that we have always existed as humans with a very clear difference between men and women, there has always existed a certain polarity. And we like to think that in a relationship we can be completely “equal” on every level. But relationship tends to not flow so well when we don’t feel “safe” to fall into a more natural polarity. This polarity can indeed exists in same sex couples, and we have seen it naturally manifest in one person being more masculine and one more feminine in these relationships. So the weirdness that comes up in a trans relationship like mine and my wife’s, is that both of us were trying to be the feminine, but because I needed so much recognition and affirmation of my gender expression and identity, she felt the need to fall to the sidelines and be less in her feminine, and the result was chaos. Her feeling constantly un wanted. Unattractive, not feeling confident to dress nicely or wear nice makeup and things as if by doing so she was stealing my show. She felt the need to take in a lot of the things in our relationship that typically would be more up my alley as the man. And it just turned our relationship upside down in many ways. Now that I’m back to my man identity, she has been able to drop more into her feminine identity, and suddenly so many things just seem to flow better. ❤️❤️❤️
@@TheLaRellI'm so glad you guys worked out. She's such a powerful and feminine woman.
LaRell sorry I am going to be brutally honest. Your whole demeanor and words about Valerie look and sound like you are starstruck. I think you let yourself be blown away by her words and discourse, whose substance I fail to find. Polarity, polarity, polarity... The honest truth is: she is as 'guilty' as you are about your transition. It is not a loving thing to have let you go all the way with your delusion. You said you insisted about it, probably demanded it. Her role as your loving spouse was to say: no f.... way.
Wishing you both all the best.
Okay. Have you ever known an addict? Have you ever been in a relationship with someone that had an addiction, or some unrelenting desire to do something and you found yourself in a position of either having to leave them or love them through whatever it is they are doing that you don't like? Sure it may be easy for you to say that my wife should have just put her foot down and said no. I think you are failing to realize the magnitude of the situation. I was ready to kill myself if I did not have the surgery. My wife had no choice but to go along with it....or leave me. She didn't want to leave me, and therefore did the next best thing. Loved me through it. It sounds to me like you see love differently. Perhaps you would leave your partner if you didn't like something they were doing. Love is stronger than that. While to you it might seem ludicrous for my wife to stay with me or support me through this, you are not her. You do not have the life experience that she does. You do not know what kind of love we actually possess. You watch a video and see the tiny little glimpse into our personal life that it portrays and you seem to make conclusions based on that. You say I seemed "Starstruck" by her. Ummm....I would sure as fuck hope so! She is my incredible wife and I am extremely lucky that she DID stay with me through all of this nonsense. I've been with her for 9 years now! She is an incredible person! And the fact that she stayed with me through this does not make her a bad person or "guilty" as if I committed some crime that she was a part of. If anything it shows how incredible she really is that she could clearly see past something that it seems you would not be able to. Every single one of us is a walking program. We are the product of every experience we have ever had, and in any given moment are making decisions based on all available information and how we currently interpret that information from our life experience driven perspectives. Therefore, my wife just the same as me, found herself thrust into a situation that she was an unwilling party to....but because she did not want to "lose" me, she had no choice but to go along with what I did. The other option would have been to leave me....or for me to leave her if she wasn't going to go along with what I felt I HAD to do at the time. So it may be easy for those on the outside to say things like "I would have left him if that was me in her shoes!" The cool thing is, it's NOT anyone else BUT her in her shoes, and therefore no one has any say in the matter.
@@TheLaRellthat's exactly how I see things. I'm currently going through watching the person I love struggle with addiction. And, I am an unwilling party but i love him more than anything and I know he will get better. I struggled with addiction and he loved me through it as well in the past. What your wife went through sounds so identical to watching the person you love struggle with an addiction.
A wife can't control her husband ! We each make our own decisions
Your wife sounds lovely. I just wish she would speak to ordinary people. He language and expression is so complex that I will have to stop listening to the video now. It might be better if you tell her story in your words.
I would be curious who these polarity teachers are, the you recommend.
Very meaningful...
My gf and I love our relationship dynamic which is androgynous Feminine tf4f or f4tf. I still cultivate select 'masculine' qualities such as chivalry because of my greater physical strength and love for the Divine Feminine.
Huh
I doubt she loves it quite as much as you do. I can practically guarantee it.
No young woman or girl ever, when dreaming of meeting the man of her dreams.... Imagined him wearing a dress!
She's tolerating and settling. No matter how much she tells herself differently cos of woke peer pressure.
Maybe you're truly confused... Or have you manipulated a situation that serves your AGP fetish?
what the hell does tf4f and f4tf mean
@@clankfish all I can think is 'trans female for female'... So basically a biological female and biogical man (in a dress)... So, a straight couple.
@@clankfish Given your profile picture, I'd be downright shocked if you didn't already know.....
Is this your daughter with your wife? How is she doing?
I’m not onboard with a lot of your wife’s opinions. I would encourage her to research feminism more thoroughly. She’s lost her way at some point.
Feminists don't accept men pretending to be women. Of course she isn't one.
Your wife is so wise
Lovely couple
You have a beautiful young wife❤ She is so understanding, how was she able to accept,?
Medical model insights are interesting..I can relate in my own way
physic keys - the candle and mushroom
Did you resent him? or want out of your marraige?
This woman is misusing a lot of words and seems to be lacking clarity on each topic she speaks about. Strange.
Such as?
@@mementomori4840”polarity is maturity, in order to have that normal masculine/feminine energy”……what? What does that even mean? Damsel in distress is hiding in our lineages? What? This is a lot of verbal diarrhea
Seems a somewhat myopic hypothesis which conveniently disregards the obvious evidence of majority of gay & lesbian relationships and marriages. 🧐
We very much recognize that even is same sex marriages…there must be a polarity. The relationship will never thrive is both partners are taking in the feminine or if both are taking on the masculine.
@@TheLaRell
Well that definitely contradicts my impression of various friends successfully relationships and marriages.
@@Emma-kz3zr even if it’s not readily apparent, the polarity exists if the relationship is working good. 😊 This is simply the rule of nature and it is an eternal rule that we are subject to whether we like it or not. We as humans tend to think we get to control such things, but we are actually subject to these rules of nature.
@@TheLaRell it is also possible (probable even) that polarities will shift throughout a lifetime with an intimate partner as life circumstances change, and demand different qualities from us. This is quite apparent in long term relationships. We see it all the time in couples, both straight and gay, in eldercare.
Couldn't listen to the whole thing. "Like" in every sentence. Too much woo woo. She is covering personal reactions with theoretical codswallop.
Around the 8th week sexual development starts, out of a split forms a penis & is why mtf trans operations r just fold n cut & ftm is cut a arm or other thing. We all have male & fe hormones. There r different reasons ppl become trans. Some have hormone & developmental issues in the womb. I understand yours too. One is also molestation as a child, another is social contagion & trendy & there’s more. She’s very psychological.
Do you think trans/gender dysphoria is a mental illness? I feel like it is. I don't say this as an insult in any way, I have dreadful anxiety myself so I understand how awful it is when there are all these thoughts in my head saying I'm not good enough and giving me feelings of constant distress and fear. Seems to me like gender dysphoria is a kinda similar thing, disordered thoughts in your head telling you you are the wrong gender ?? I just wonder if people could be given more mental health help then many people with gender dysphoria might not get to the point where they actually try to change their gender.
I think Transgenderism has both a spiritual and psychosocial basis.
Do you think our souls are non binary? Is the soul genderless ?
I think we reincarnate boy, girl, boy, girl, etc. Transgenderism and homosexuality may be caused by boy, boy, boy or girl, girl, girl, etc.
I think our souls are genderless but identify as the last gender on Earth.
From México city I admire you you look so hansom beautyful. Smile Jesús gave you believe It or not Jesús crist Made a miracle on you keep on telling the true God do not make mistakes you aré so cute frome inside and outside AND you do look like a men
You shold spend rest of your life worshipping your wife believe me you are one lucky lucky man much more than u know sorry for coise of words English is not my language but i hope u anderstend what i mean
What are they trying to say "universal laws of polarity" like what does it mean, all I hear is unscientific word diarrhea. This is extremely hard to listen to...
Two amazing ppl🤍🤍. You can tell you’ve put a lot of work into your relationship….I never would’ve thought about the polarity issue, very fascinating. Thank u for the education…such a good parallel of couples dealing with addiction.
Yes I was always so fascinated with addiction and actually studied it relentlessly recognizing that it’s based in exactly the same concepts which is complex trauma and trying to escape the overwhelming sense of pain and numbness in the body due to trauma different people choose different ways to avoid the pain and suffering and different circumstances lead to different flavors of poison you enjoy the most.
Society loves to label everything and everyone. My husband has many “feminine” qualities about him. He is very sweet and caring and gentle. I have many “masculine” qualities. I can out belch any man. Does that make me any less female or my husband any less male? No! Everything that people have labeled overlaps. I have many chronic illnesses and mental illnesses that have the same symptoms. I also have many symptoms of other illnesses that I do not have. Just because someone has a “symptom,” doesn’t mean they have the “disease.” Society has gone overboard with telling people they have to be labeled. We are not labels! We are people. Unique to ourselves. Everyone wants to be in everyone’s business, caught up in labels. They tell people WHAT they are instead of WHO they are.
Trans women seem to attract masculine women, especially before they transition.