Indifferent My husband acts as if he can't see or hear me. [Hello Counselor Sub:ENG,THA/2018.08.20]
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Hello Counselor EP.376
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“You don’t marry one person; you marry three: the person you think they are, the person they are, and the person they are going to become as a result of being married to you.”
-Richard Needham
You also marry yourself. Means that you love and accept yourself, understand yourself, and know what's best for yourself. Only when someone loves, understands, and accepts themselves will they be able to live their life to the fullest and be the best version of themselves.
*Cos everyone demands for the perfect someone without even trying to be that perfect person themselves*
@@sherine9033 omg preach
I broke the 666
Soooo true. Wonder if the divorce rate would drop if people got married knowing this
@Lineplay Avatargame for good reason.marriage can wreck havoc with emotions and can change u into a different person ..IF not done right.Its not a bed of roses for sure.Requires constant hard work from both sides.lots of adjustments from both sides.In hindsight i think it wasnt for me.but now am happily divorced.But i would still say,its an individual choice.marry when u know u are ready and u hav the person who is right for u ..and not cz parents or society want u be married.
"I don't think I love her anymore."
MAAAN, THIS IS SO HEARTBREAKINGGGGG.
I was in shock when I heard him say that! I've watched about 30 random episodes of Hello Counselor and seen many couples with serious conflicts. But not once have I heard one partner say that he doesn't love the other anymore. Especially on national Korean TV. It's like revealing a huge secret shame to everyone in a place where saving face is a big deal.
yeah i really couldn't understand why she was still sitting there ... i mean the only reason she started drinking that much and why she curses at him while drunk is because she couldn't vent her anger at him while sober ... so she just did it while drunk ... and him neglecting her is the biggest problem here .. getting fed up with her after giving birth is a common thing for a lot of men out there ....
YESSSS I literally cried as soon as he said that I couldn't believe it!
Of course both the husband and wife are at fault, but if both of them communicate and do their part to change and support the other it would solve so much
I mean I give him props for having the balls to say that on TV! Although I'm a bit confused because he says everything will get better once the wife quits drinking. Sooo there still is some love there? Anyways if one is miserable in marriage and always fighting , get a divorce and pay child support.
I WAS READY TO FIGHT
the fact that she was hesitant to stop drinking even when her marriage and kids at stake, speaks volume
yea, i dont understnd her. She still doesnt realize she is at fault in this case or what smh
No amount of anger would make you say you don’t love the person you married. I think he has truly lost the feelings he had for her.
He doesn't feel appreciated or respected, and neither does she. Same on both sides. She was pregnant for yrs. He treated her like crap.
That is not true. When you have hit the point of no return you can very easily say you no longer love the person you are married to because it is true. Especially when abuse is involved.
@@krystalrayne5235 that's what dream angel was saying, you won't say it unless it's true. I think that is the case for most people, unless they're doing it to manipulate the person (but people like that don't know how to actually love someone). He said it and seemed to mean it, he was forced to call her honey and wouldn't even hold her hand properly. It was especially sad to see her break down hearing that
Jojo Jo well she shouldn't drink so much and shouldn't belittle him. Why when it is a man he is in the wrong but if it is a female then it is still his fault. It's her fault that they are like this.
I can relate cause my husband of 3 years is exactly like the women or even worse then her, abusive (emotionally and physically), manipulative etc etc, and I can tell you for sure that i don't love him anymore but we are still together cause of my daughter.
I want this kind if show in my country. But at the same time, I think this kind of show will not go really well in my country. Cause I believe if we had this kind of show, some chair must be flying 😂
Ika Kml i don’t know where you are from but I can relate 🤣
Where are you from? ahahaha
I can relate alsooo~ hahah
Somehow feel familiar r we from the same country?
It'll be like Jeremy Kyle 😂😂
I think both need to go to marital counseling. Both have dealt with their issues with either alcohol or indifference which is not good. They have deep grudges against each other and having three kids at such short difference in age may have taken a toll on both of them.
she keeps grudges about him making her knocked up 3 times , but he cant keep a grudge about belittling him in front of his children, making every decision, and she hits him.. woo.
Plus the personality difference makes them clash. Him being curt and blunt and her needing more caring. They work against each other. They're tit for that. You do this to me so I will do that. They don't communicate.
Yeah it is better to seek professional help
@@ersendal2466 this is why they coming on tv are not a good decision. Because people like you who looks at one side only wtf man
I honestly don't think marriage counseling can fix him not being in love with her tbh. I'm not saying what's he doing right now is right (for example completely ignoring her like she dosent exist and taking care of the kids)But its that's the best option to avoid conflicts and make sure the kids are taken care of so be it.
I actually feel very bad for him. She needs to solve her alcohol and agressive behavior problems first. This is obviously doing a great damage to her family as a whole.
He doesn’t love her anymore and you can tell he’s checked out of the marriage. I bet he’s only staying for the kids but you can tell he’s out.
Chim Cham most couples some point in life in marriage will experience time like this
@@yeeryoungjeon they might experience this, but as soon as someone hit you the marriage is out the door. They will divorce eventually.
Wait so she fell while pregnant because she was drunk???? Am i the only one honestly bothered by this? Why didn't they acknowledge this?
I SAID THIS TOO!! but i feel like she couldn't be drunk while 1) being pregnant and 2) going to work. i feel like he just said that because it was a big issue for him in the first place :///
When she was pregnant she faint while going to work on the bus. When she fell while being drunk was another situation.
@@sunshinee_pan but he said he was worried for the baby amd her but was pissed that the reason for the fall was being drunk. Like wtf if its true that's one hell of a red flag
lovecandyshop No then he was talking about her still going to work. When she fell was the other incident she talks about where she damaged her arm. Not pregnant
The one where she was drunk and fell on the ice was after the birth of her second child, so she wasn't pregnant at that time.
Now I'm feeling sorry for the kids. It must be a really traumatic moment in their life with all these hate their parents share and those unfair attention for the kids. I wish the kids are going to be okay and the parents' relationship getting better.
True
i think he actually does still love her but he has been hurt so much he doesn't want to feel he loves her
yoongi's hoe, I believe original comment meant “he has been hurt so much [by her, his wife] he doesn’t want to feel he loves her” or so I interpreted it.
well, she has depression and this idiot pushed it aside. How is that her fault?
mjow NO. I have depression and if my friends ditched me because I was fucking abusive, manipulative and/or berating it would be totally valid. Having depression does not make it okay for you to treat others like that. She may be suffering but she has no right to make him suffer like that too. She never even let him interact with his friends before she had kids, this has clearly not got to do with her depression: more to do with her abusive tendencies and his lack of communication skills. I hope for the sake of his mental health and his children’s that they get a divorce
@@bratzglamoruslife123 lets look at both side why dont we, damn it why do I need to teach people about this
Yes I think so too, it's possible to rekindle love for someone just with mutual respect and kindness
I feel like the husband's actions were very forced after they 'made up'. It's hard to love/fall back in love with someone once you've checked out like that.
Mercy E. That’s so true but I guess the fact that he wanted to come to the show first means that he still care at least...
Chitanda Ch he actually wanna apply his story to hello conselor. He came to the show more like to speak up that his wife way more worse than he is, not because he care.
@@chitandach3340 yeah because he wants to stay for the children, that's just doesn't work. They already got physical (from her part) is difficult to overcome and continue a relation with an abuser that has an addiction. His not by any means a rehabilitation center, if someone hits you and disrespect you, leave, period.
Certainly not within an hour. This episode was poorly done. There's no sincerity. It was a show.
It is hard not impossible otherwise many couples would be fall apart.. And ofc it is forced normally when we fight for someone we don't directly say i love u or touch.. And plus he is kind of introvert.. I would do the same as him
i really like how this show handle the issue. They dont blame on one side and blaming them. They focus on find the root problem and solve it. Really need to apply it in our life.
Racunga I think what they do in this show is not enough , they wrap up everything at the end and make it funny and end the case .
like this couple they really need some couple therapy or professional counseling .
Yeah im agree with you. The couple need to put a lot of effort to repair back their relationship.
What im highlighting is the show itself. Within limited time, they try their best to discuss the problem in harmony way. That make this show worth to see. They give something for the audiences to think. Normally people just take shortcurt, blaming one side without hearing others opinion and do it aggressive way.
The people sending their concerns know the premise of the show and how it works so I doubt they go in there anticipating a serious therapist-style program
@@kangtavenus1236 we are not sure of that, because we don't know what they did or said to these people behind the camera.
you must not watch it enough than lol
🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂 TRUST they will pick sides which is sad.
I feel more sorry for him than her... it seems like he should have been the one to call in with the story about how she treats him, I feel like her going on the show backfired and made them feel sorry for him and not her
sure she treats him very wrong, but she has been through a lot herself and her husband wasn't there to support her through her pain. They are both at fault, she treated him like garbage. He treated her like she was a burden in his life while she still loved him.
Within 5 years, all she did was pregnant and gave birth and take care of babies/younger children, mostly alone PLUS stress after giving birth. I understand her husband doesn't like her drunken attitude but why she drank?! Because she is obviously stressful. Going through so much and her husband is indifferent and not supportive, that's hard. Both have their own faults. Husband and wife need COMMUNICATION. They barely have one. What I feel sorry the most is their three children.
7:41 watch again the smiling face of the wife.. while he says he bathes , giving formulas to his children ..and u saying '' not supportive''
he supported his children. NOT his wife.
@@m.y.4292 what if it was the husband who did that to his wife and went through all that I bet you wouldn't take his side
The guy should be the one with the concern
no he is the cause of all her problems
@@bratzglamoruslife123 lmao you see how you want to
@@bratzglamoruslife123 he did nothing tho
@@bratzglamoruslife123 let's turn the tables and let the behavior of the wife be that of the husband. We'll see how brave your talk would be here then.
@@bratzglamoruslife123 no, he's NOT the cause of her problems. Alcohol IS.
He's very straightforward and does not lie for the sake of the show and views. He's seriously hurt and emotionally at that. He is a good Dad and despite getting treated that way by her wife and belittled by her, he still stays calm for the kids sake and did not leave her. I'm usually on the side of the women. But this time it's obviously her fault for being alcoholic and abusive.
The wife...she gives me certain vibes. I feel like she's more at fault for things than came out here. the guy just seems like he's a quiet and stoic person, and tries not to cause problems by avoiding her and the situations all together.
I had post partum, so I can understand it. But she abuses alcohol and seems to become abusive when she drinks. That's not 100% post partum's fault. I feel like the guy is only staying because he's afraid of not being able to be in his kids' lives.
In this situation, I honestly worry more for him, especially because the hosts seemed more inclined to side with the wife and doubt the guy more, even though the things she does are much more alarming. I honestly hope he gets out of there soon, male abuse victims rarely ever get help and it can lead to damaging behaviors and may affect their kids later.
I am afraid about the husband mental health more that the woman, she is abusive and toxic wants the husband obey her when she doesnt respect him at all! Divorce is probably a solution because the wife seems still hesitant to stop drinking after she realized her fault of his indifferent
Totally agree, it’s probably because Korea is a patriarchal country, they don’t see a drunk woman hitting a man the same as a man hitting a woman.
True indeed. Agree with you.
He is absolutely a victim of abuse. And that will only chip away at him is he stays with her
It’s weird how most of this comment section are sympathizing with wife and samir are blaming mainly the husband
He’s not in love with her. This relationship is over but he’s willing to stay for the kids and I appreciate him for that.
Hope they can patch things up soon.
Fujoshi Chan well love is in lots of form love can bring bit of hate and hurt. Relationship is not over. Life is long there are many many years in marriage.
This couple is really young, most of couple had or will experience time. Like this. Bit extreme but they will getting better.
But sometimes staying in a loveless marriage is damaging to everyone involved. Especially the kids.
i agree you on that part..they can still work it out about the kids,but staying at the same roof without love can create a lot of unhappiness to all of the members..you,your partner and the kids..even if the kids are young,even if you parents don't show it to the kids that you have a problem,still kids can know about it..they are very observant,you can't lie to the kids..trust me,you can't..
@@lavoshakern yep
I've been there. Staying married just for the sake of the kids.
Listening to this family story, i can relate to her husband more, even tho I am a women.
No 1 want to have abusive partner. Verbally and physically. Just because she a women doesn't gave her the right to be violent.
And here she wondering why her husband indifferent toward her, and wanting his affection??
Listen girl!! His loves for you, are all vanished when you laid your hand on him!!
When you cursed and took his pride as husband down.
This lady only get pregnant so she can keep her husband next to her. Because she knows,.her husband loves their kids.
This women is a poisoneous snake.
This episode made me so upset, if it was a woman complaining that her husband drinks a lot and gets verbally and physically abusive and jealous, the MCs and commenters would be as lenient or forgetful like they are when they bash the husband. This woman seems very manipulative, I feel very badly for the husband in this situation.
I agree with you
"Why do you earn so little" is unacceptable. Who wouldn't resent someone for saying that? Even if she is a woman, and even if she was hormonal, it doesn't give her an excuse to belittle her husband 😕
thats all nice until food runs out and bills stack.
@@Cazimie Oh ok so men can say that to women and that's ok? and abuse women? because this woman did both. Double standards.
@@lamma746 thats statement counts for female and male. They decided together to have many children so both are at fault.
but that wasnt the reason he ignored her..he was curt from beginning..even to his friend.. what if u get ignored to your questions by your partner
I’m 100% on his side. She’s absolutely ridiculous and uses the kids against him. It’s sick.
NOT true
If he wasn't sure if he will be able to love her his whole life he shouldn't married her so yeah..
I mean she is the person who will spend his whole life with and have kids with so I think they are both wrong but I'm more on her side 👍
Allison Eigenbrod im sorry but im more on her side. If he wasnt sure if hed love her forever then its only unfair that she has to live in such pain
what if your husband doesnt answer you whenever you ask a question? Also she wanted a little more money cause it was hard to handle three kids with little money.
I understand the wife's feeling. As a woman, you want your husband to care for you and be affectionate but to be honest I really think the issues started with her. The actions she did and the words she said can't be seen as just anger speaking. Her alcohol problem is what sprout all the issues. You can't do all that and then demand for affection. It's hypocrite of her. The husband definitely fell out of love. He probably didn't want to put up with her violence and aggressiveness so he decided to stay quiet and cold towards her for the sake of the kids. She says she has postpartum depression, than it should only be making her sad, low energy, anxiety, crying episodes, irritability, and changes in sleeping or eating patterns. I don't think agression and violence are symptoms. When he said she wants him to obey her. I had a feeling that she has a dominant personality whereas the husband is a bit more docile. He's docile but doesn't like to be controlled. Personally, I think she has control and anger issues. Obviously it takes 2 to tango. The husband could have handled this better but I think he really gave up on his wife. I'm just pointing out that the wife see fault in her husband but she's the one that is extreme and is blaming that on her postnatal depression. And to be honest the hosts are being way to soft on her. If that was a men sitting there. He would have been scolded and made shamed off.
wel said.
i think she meant she drinks because of her depression... and because she drinks she turns violent... I'm sure she knows what she does while she drinks is wrong... she's not blaming her violence on her depression and saying it's ok for her to do that... this woman does need to stop drinking since this brings out her violent side, but it seems to be hard for her to do that now because if she doesn't drink nobody's gonna be there to support her depression since her husband isn't in love with her anymore... i do hope if she decides to stop drinking her husband can be a bit more warm towards her and help her get over it... but at the same time I wouldn't blame him if he doesn't since he's been through a lot because of her... there doesn't seem to be a clear cut solution for this... just wanted to mention she's not using depression as an excuse for violence, but as a explanation of how she's having a hard time
Yeah the root cause is alcohol in this marital status. Her husband is cold in word but his action is real. I think she had depression and want to take attention from his husband or maybe she makes high expectations toward her husband for lovey dovey, but his husband maybe tired or any pressure in job like driver, and he like calm situation after that, meanwhile she need someone to talk about her daily activity and she never met expectations so she run away with alcohol.
Poor for both of them, and i’m really sad with their children, too
When the husband said he didn't love his wife anymore, I almost cried myself. I hope they work hard to fix their relationship ^^ Hwaiting~!
This is why I don't want to get married. It's scary
임해라Helena yes omg. You don’t know what kind of person you’ll meet and no matter how much you love them and they love you, you’ll never completely know each other, and people change. Marriage is scary and so is raising children.
what's even scarier is living your entire life alone with 20 cats, never giving or receiving love and affection, never experiencing the pure joy of having offspring and dying with no one by your side.
try it for yourself before you make assumptions
I don't need husband. It's okay for me to die single 😉
Orca Gang you can still live with your partner together without getting married.
why is the wife trying to guilt trip everyone once they start agreeing with the husband
The guy still doesn't seem happy, like he doesn't love her but he can tolerate her if she's not drunk
I don't think I love her anymore.
I'm hurting.
i mean if i was that guy i wouldn't love her either..
@@liezelanne777 same
I normally cry a lot at the sad episodes .. But when the husband said "I don't think I love her anymore" that hit so hard.
he doesnt love her anymore, and i dont really see any chance of him ever loving her again... this episode made me cry wow, how upsetting would it be to have the man you love, married, and have three kids with say *i dont love you anymore* on tv. think about it
i just found this show now and i've been binge watching it for an hour. I CANNOT STOP. its hilarious X"D
“i dont think i love her anymore” how did she not start sobbing?? thats the most heartbreaking thing to hear i started crying for her
She smiled
@@mintstudent9442 im not taking any sides but i can see that shes very hurting inside but tried to hide it by smiling i used to do that lots of time when i was very hurted like trying to smile even tho its hurting so bad but most likely i ended up cried in shock after that like her.
@@mangrycat6928 This woman is toxic
Is it just me or that woman is so selfish? There is even husband that just go out the house without even helped the housework. He does everything, the only problem is he just have a quiet personality. She does not respect his husband because he is younger than her. Very manipulative and playing victim is so selfish.
They really need counselling. Their problems will not end just by this show. Grudge, anger, depression and alcohol. I fear that their children be affected with whats happening between them.
Tbh i think the husband really doesn't love her anymore, he's only staying for the kids. I felt that answer of him when they asked him if he still love her. They may get better in the next months, years but it will definitely end up just being a housemate in the long run.
The husband just feels empty yet he still hang on for the sake of the kids. He's a good dad and the wife is doing her best to be a good mum and wife too, im sure. Just that they approach things wrongly and end up losing feelings and stressful.
Man that marriage is done he only staying with her for the kids sake you can see it in his face. She got a alcohol problem and she put her hands on him oh yeah it's over. And what gets me if it was the other way around the crowd would be completely outraged people really make me sick.
So true! I hate double standart 😪
She is clearly abusing him that's fucked up
@@sephoraefunda7009 Exactly
Whe he said that he doesnt love her anymore, was real af! Fast answer, without doubing even a for sec. He doesnt love her, you can see it on his face, he is done. They should just divorce instead of being together for the kids. He doesnt even wants to hold her hand, its a serious situation.
This comment...yikes. So ignorant.
This was an emotional rollercoaster
Thanks for coming to my ted talk
I'm sure they got married because she was pregnant. She said that her eldest is five years old and that they are married for 5 years so that's why they married early. I really don't like women falling pregnant before getting married because it only rushes think that shouldn't happen
Wonhoe Wifey why are u putting the blame on the women only. man also should be at fault . no one can get pregnant out of the blue .
Jelly Jalyna They are both at fault but the one who carries the baby is the woman so.. the man can just run away and leave her. or that he would want her to abort her baby which a lot of women refuse to do sothat’s why a woman should be careful. BUT ONCE A WOMAN GETS PREGNANT THE BLAME IS ON BOTH. Well she can’t get pregnant alone
It’s not true. Korean way of counting age is different from other countries. New born baby is already 1-year-old when he/she is born in Korea. Therefore, their first child is 3 or 4-year-old in western way.
I feel like they should split up if they're going to continue like that... The kid that hits his dad should go with the mom and the child that only likes his dad should go with the dad.
I grew up with parents that fought 24/7 and the only reason they stayed together was for my sister and I which I find ridiculous because now I have a buttload of mental health issues. I celebrated when they finally divorced. It was much better with only one parent and being a bit poorer
That's not a good idea to separate the kids they may hate each other in the future and stuff soooo i think they really need to give their relationship another chance
No, I don't think that's a good idea. I grew up with seperated parents and it would have just been stressful for everyone if they tried to stay together. You can't force love. And you have to think about the parents too... would you like to stay together with someone that you dont love anymore just because your children like this person? I don't think so.
The kids won't hate each other in the future, they can always alternate between staying at the mother and father's house. The family doesn't need to split in half, it's just the parents that shouldn't be with each other anymore.
Lisa Oppa so you rather sleep with someone you hate to the bone? You prob 10 then. They just dont match, why even try 100 times? Its like try to putting your foot to the wrong size of shoes, and the salesman said "you really need to give another chance (to the same shoes). Thats just ridiculous.
@@lisaoppa5784 It's fine to give the relationship another chance, but if that chance fails they should split up
I know what she feel... Being ignored is so depressing,,, when you come home, u hope that there is someone who will smile to you and u find "home". But when u cant find it, its really make u depressed
"I don't think I love her anymore"
Ouch. I felt that shit.
I really love how the MC's asked them about what they like about each other 💕👏
It sounds like the wife never got proper diagnosis and treatment for her postpartum depression, so in turn, she self-medicated with alcohol which altered her behavior for the worse. It’s important to get proper treatment. See a psychiatrist and a marriage counselor. She did not know how to handle the stresses of being a mother and took that frustration out on her husband. He adapted to fatherhood easier than she did to motherhood, making her jealous and resentful.
Depression does change people, she is not the same person she once was, but with treatment that can be worked on. I think there is still love there, but they have been emotionally abusing each other for a long time. It will take real work and cooperation to change those ingrained behaviors.
Yes both are at fault in some ways but I blame the mom. She obviously has a drinking problem. And while the husband describes himself as curt, he's not curt at all (with all the deadbeat husbands that have been on the show I cam spot one from a mile away and he is not one of them). Even the examples she gave of him being "cold and curt" he actually just had considerate intentions (she made him out to seem evil for playing with the kids and giving her a break so she can eat dinner in peace, like wtf?!?!) He's actually sweet but just a man of few words. I can tell he's been really hurt since he comes off as timid to say anything, and he doesn't have the look of love in his eyes when he looks at his wife. A red flag for me was when the mother said him taking good care of the kids was "too much" because he doesn't pay attention to her... Welp that's what being a parent is! It's just a fact that once you have kids you can't live in this honeymood stage and date and be romantic all the time because you have to care for the kids first. Her getting violent when drunk IN FRONT OF THE KIDS?!?! Yea she's defintely the problem. What makes things worse is that the friend revealed she was possessive of him even before they got married. I think the husband wants her to stop drinking so he can tolerate her while raising the kids but after that he's done. He answered that question "do you love her?" Very quickly, with no. His mind has been made up, and tbh this whole relationship was basically abusive towards him and the kids. Hope he finds happiness and she gets some alcohol/anger management counselling. This really was a tragic concern :/
she fell and got hurt and he just said ok? and shes the bad one? they are both in the wrong. yes she has alcohol problems and a violent streak but they both did some terrible things to eachother and neither should be excused
SkarletRose Yes, it was wrong of him, but no its not comparable to what she did. She hit him. She actually used physical force against him. She insulted him. All in front of their children.
Not to mention that the only reason she fell is because she was drunk, and he even told her to stay at home.
It breaks my heart that we've literally got a victim of domestic violence right there and people still manage to blame the victim because hey he was rude that one time! he deserved the hit right!
@@Imprettyghoul .... if you had an alcoholic, abusive husband that fell and got hurt while drunk you would be overly concerned? I think not.
whatever it is... how would you feel if your partner kept ignoring to every question you ask? he gives just quietness and no answer...
I have noticed it many times that lot of wives make their husbands feel bad about not earning enough or lesser than her. And husbands get extremely offended by the same.
As if a man is not man enough if he isn't earning more than his wife. These toxic ideas of being a man is so harmful for the whole system.
It's not the fault of wives, but the whole system that thinks man has to be a provider, woman always have to be on the receiving end.
As a kid growing up with parents that do not get on with each other I just wanted to share my thoughts. I really wish that they'd split up. My dad is like the mum in this episode. He's abusive, physically and verbally and spreads toxicity and negative energy everywhere around him. When you step foot through the door it's tense and scary and impossible to relax. I begged my mum to divorce him along with my siblings. She didn't and she regrets it a lot now. He's not as bad as he used to be but now we're essentially trapped. It's a horrible feeling.
same exact with me
But here isnt ur mom dad.. They came to solve problems and to say whatever in their mind.. This is something called as counseling.. Divorce isnt always solution
I can't imagine the pain of hearing your spouse say "I don't love her anymore" holy shit.
"I don't think I love her anymore" made my heart actually hurt. That's my ultimate fear. I had to pause it the video and put my phone down to chill out.
Guy, this woman exhibits the classic symptoms of narcissism.
The minute the husband defends his actions and she’s he’s actually a good father, she breaks out the tears. To get sympathy and distract people from asking why she implied he’s a bad father. No one asked that because they were consoling her.
She isolates him from his friends by saying she would be left alone if he went. But it’s normal for people in close relationships to also seek emotional ties with other people, friends and family.
This a an excuse narcissists use to isolate the victim.
She gets drunk and HITS THE GUY physically abusing him. And then makes excuses and breaks out the tears to prevent people assigning blame to her. I’ve had to battle depression for over ten years, and now 1 year in the clear finally, but never in that time did I violently hurt people. I have friends who have bipolar or schizophrenia which are far more difficult to deal with and they e never hurt anyone and used that as an excuse.
This is a class A narcissist and she’s dragged him into this show to fuck him over in front of the whole nation and garner pity for herself.
no it is not exactly like that your way of dealing with depression is different from others. she needed counseling and he also needed that too. stop judging people please
I would say u plz stop being judgemental,,u don't know what c is going through,, der is some reason so she is here
I totally agree.
It wasn't that negative about her which u made it.. She was in depression and she wanted some things from him.. Bit eventually her drinking habit ruin it more.. We give many reasons for ppl's shortcuts on i m depressed so i start drinking, smoking and many more.. But when it show its bad effect we start blaming them totally
@@metimelaku4066 please don't take everything as judgemental.. He or she saying the things which is shown..
Wow, I felt so much affection for this couple. I really want them to make things work. When I say the team of hosts/counselors was amazing, wow they really did a great job. I hope they are doing much better now and are more cognizant of the way they treat each other.
how are ppl on the hot seat saying its not a concern ..i'm literally surprised... like his a marriage issue so obviously a little more than a concern ...
Im on the husbands side for this one. I wouldnt say this is entirely the womans fault but she plays a major part. For one, she is extremely manipulative, crying whenever the situation goes out of her favour, which can be seen evidently in the video where she is crying whenever things turn against her, trying to gain sympathy from the audience and hosts alike. I’m not saying all her tears were fake, but a lot of them were used to make her look like the victim. Second of all, she purposefully omits important details like the falling on the bus while pregnant, and saying that all her husband did was to scold her. When said just like that, its obvious the husband is in the wrong, because the wife, although pregnant is going to work on public transport, but he has the audacity to scold her instead of asking if shes fine. But its later revealed that he had already told her not to go to work, and that she had been DRINKING while pregnant. She obviously planned this to gain favour from the audience thinking her husband wont bust her out of her lie seeing hes a man of few words. This is my own personal view as i come from a family of alcoholics, and they are all abusers and super egoistical and turn violent whenever something pricks their pride. Going on the husband, it is established he is a reserved and quiet person, from his behaviour in the video, where he pauses before he speaks, thinking what he has to say, and saying it short as possible, and how he restrains his smile. This shows he keeps things to himself, but like the wife said, he is talking a lot. Which means this issue must be affecting him a lot for him to burst out of his comfort zone. Im a reserved person myself, and i dont talk unless i really have to so i could say i have a gist in why he does some of the things he does. Like talking a lot because we have been keeping a lot hidden in, and that we feel wronged. And his friend of 20 years said he has always been curt, so when he says he thinks he doesnt love her anymore, he doesnt. This hasnt been going on for just a day, its been going on for a long time, and hes done. Everyone has their breaking point. The fact that the husband isnt much of a talker shows that there is very little communication between them, which leads to many unsolved problems and misunderstandings. This relationship will never see light unless someone changes. Its best if they go their own paths where the husband has the custody over the kids because the wife is too emotional and will probably lash out on the kids from the stress and her very obvious alcoholism problem that the hosts are glossing over. The wife needs time with her loved ones to get her self esteem up again and to quit her drinking problem. The husband needs to learn that a marriage is a two way relationship and him clamming up will not work. Also am very disappointed with the hello counsellor hosts for treating the wife’s alcoholism and abusive behaviour towards the husband so lightly....very disappointed
On a side note the wife looks like sejeong(???im not sure im spelling it right) from gugudan doesnt she? Or is it just me haha cldnt help notice it whenever the camera closed up on her
Thanks for highlighting it over “wife alcoholism problem and the hosts are glossing over” -> if a guy did that, the will act differently.
She herself has a victim mentality. Stating so much lie. She needs to stop drinking OMG.
His wife keeps using pregnancy as an excuse... Did she forget that there's a thing called protection she can use? She came on there acting like a victim until he started revealing all the dirt. Seriously, I felt like she was more than a problem than he was. You can tell he is tired of being with her. She has a problem with alcohol. Look at that...14:50 she purposely hides the fact she was drunk and that's the reason why she fell. Then her husband told the truth 16:43 This guy deserves better. She got drunk when she was pregnant... that's horrible.
Yes, that's what i thought 🙌
It’s probably not illegal to drink in Korea cause the counselors or whatever u call them didn’t seem to fazed by it
She said the two times she got pregnant was when they were drunk....
They didn’t say much about her drinking habits but if it was the husband they would’ve make him look so bad
The double standard is real
The fact that both wanted to be on the show means they still love each other just that theres so mucj hurt on both ends. Hope they work it out
He’s not in love with her anymore, its obvious. He’s only staying with her for their kids. He should leave the marriage is too damaged. He said it so quick without hesitation that he doesn’t love her, he must mean it
When we r hurt we mean many things... Even we feel hurt for yourself should we cut our life.. If the problem being solved i dont think there's a need of divorce. There is a reason why marriage is different than normal relationship.. It isn't treat as fun to feel something is off so just break up
I knew the second she started crying she was manipulative. She saw that people were taking his side and cried so that people would come to her defense, every time they side with him she gets teary eyed all of a sudden. I’ve seen abusers like that , especially women ones, who are ‘sensitive’ as an excuse to be manipulative/abusive. Verbal and physical abuse of any kind is serious and uncalled for. You married someone who’s communication style was incompatible with your personality, that’s your fault, he didn’t change he just had other concerns. This reminds me of that hello counselor episode from 2 years ago where the woman came to complain about the man only to find out she was beating him.
THIS!!!!! I thought I was the only one who noticed her doing that.
Which ep was it? The 2 years ago one
yeah i agree the woman is the one who is wrong
What episode
It's good that I found a comment that wasn't so 'one-sided' with the wife. I believe that the wife made it harder for him to stick to the relationship. Now that she's admitted to also doing some bad things to him, I don't blame him for losing his interest in her. But I do hope the best for them.
I really like to watch Hello Counselor, even more than idol room/other variety shows. This show is really have big impact to person/family. They see a problem not only from 1 side, but also from another side. I like it when it tried to fix their relationship by giving them chance to remember the old days, so they can flashback and in a moment forget about their argue.
I want to give a thumbs up for this program 👍🏻
*"i don't think i love her anymore"*
So should we end here *cause you only know you love her when you let her go* :(
*And you let her go*
I felt bad for the husband but I do hope that they'll work this out. He is such a great husband
He's angry with her. She realizes she's messed up but is too prideful to admit it. If she can change her controlling ways they might fully reconcile. They both have issues marriage counseling is definitely needed. I pray it works out for them.
Me thinking her final wish would be about love but then I hear
“I will drink tonight and quit starting tomorrow”
Laughed so hard funniest wish I have heard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Ugh I feel like it's mainly the wife's fault.
um no. she had POST PARTUM DEPRESSION. and her trash husband told her to get over it.
mjow you can't self diagnose for postpartum depression.
@Jupiterfusion123 ABCD agreed
mjow he’s not a trash husband, he literally takes care of the kids, bathed them and feeds them. He’s an ideal husband and I high key doubt he would’ve been curt if she wasn’t abusive. If not for the kids, he would’ve gotten a divorce and rightly so
@@bratzglamoruslife123 the trash of a wife tries to put all the blame on the husband when all she does is get drunk and use her pregnancy as an excuse. cant you tell how desperate she looks when the audience started to agree with the husband? AND PLUS you CAN'T self-diagnose yourself with postpartum depression
This is one of the only episodes where I truly feel like this is a big actual concern. This is a serious issue for the couple, and their kids as well. They have a lot to work on. I think it would be a great thing for them to start going to marriage counseling. I believe they can learn to love again, and that they can get through this if they really want to. I’m rooting for them as a couple. Best of wishes.
I don't understand why the wife wrote the concern. I see this as the husband's concern.
the ending is actually so adorable ♡
Did anyone else see how happy she looked when he admitted he didn't love her anymore because of her actions? 15:35 Something is quite strange about her behavior, and possibly manipulative. She was giving half truths to her stories to sway opinion against her husband, like she didn't say she was drunk when she fell.
U think too much
her expression is more like a shock to me, she tries to smile but really hurt inside because she still loves him
I really feel bad for the husband. He's patient and controlling his anger/frustration by ignoring her, which is much better than arguing and fighting and bringing up all their problems and her emotional abuse/violence. The fact that she never apologised for that income remark irks me; no wonder he just ignores her. He just wants a quiet life with his kids and is tired of fighting her. It must suck when she stops him from taking the kids out or going out with his friends, as if she has any right in the matter. A lesser man would have continued fighting her or walked out.
Behind every king, there is a queen. If you feel like she is forcing you to do so, follow her leads and obey her, then, you don't care for her, you don't love her anymore. Otherwise, you would be willing to before she even has to ask... This man here is not ready at all for a married relationship.
honestly it's both their faults, there are some instances where you just need to part ways and this is one of them.
When he said "I don‘t think I love her anymore." I felt that.
I really understand their misunderstandings. Hoping they’ll work it out together.
So it’s evident that this show is not recommended for their current circumstances as the matters are quite serious. What’s happened here is she’s come to the show with concerns while disregarding a lot of her faults and only focusing on his. She never took into consideration how much her actions, words and habits would affect him and their children, and now she’s left in a mess. The problem isn’t him, it’s her. It’s not the alcohol, it’s her making alcohol the problem from her behaviour patterns, and him wanting to ignore her and focus solely on the children is completely fine because that’s his priority. If he has presented the root of the problem and she has ignored it, he could easily file for divorce and full custody as such unstable & violent behaviour around children is illegal. Good on him for keeping his priorities straight.
Sounded like a couple who do want to be together and build family together, but bombarded with stress and depression and forgot to pay attention to each other. Both busy doing their own thing, spending times apart instead with each other. Take care of yourself, your love, your family and each other. We all needed love and kindness, especially from the one we loved.
Yeongja i really like you u r a great personality i wish to meet u on day u r very beautifull i m ur fangirl😢😢
I feel bad for her because he was such a caring person at the begining and then he changed. I don't think people remeber that part. No wonder she drinks so much and then becomes agressive when he acts so cold towards her, all the time. The problem is she married the wrong guy. She should've married somebody who is more emotional and caring, not cold. Their personallities just don't go together. Don't pretend you are something that you're not just to get the girl and then show your true self when it's too late.
When I saw "what kind of marriage are you dreaming of,Sayuri"I was like omg she has the same name as me!
As soon as i heard him say i dont love her anymore, my heart just sank
I really wish the best for this couple. If they manage to change some of their ways, it will only deepen their relationship. And as someone who's been in a relationship with an alcoholic I know exactly what emotional damage it does. It becomes very hard to love the other person. I hope she'll stay off it.
man this show can really help in your relationships like i am really amazed WOW love you guys too much
In mariage problems can lead to two things either the end of the mariage or being understanding and loving partner for each other. Mariage isn't about yourself but also your spouse and child.
Usually I see concerns like this and I can see if they can rebuild the relationship or not, it’s usually the latter but with these two I think with hard work they can fix it
I was looking through the comments for this episode, and when all of them were basically saying that the wife is manipulative, I saw it. And that is very scary that no one else (in the show) saw it either. I would say "husband you gotta run fam" but the kids, you can;t leave the kids behind because who knows what story that lady would twist up and make her kids think that their father did not care or does not love them
She sounds like a terrible mother and a terrible wife. Who tf would complain about their husband loving their children 'too much?' It's obvious she's jealous of all the attention he's giving the children. I respect him for staying in this marriage for his children however a divorce may be most healthy for all parties involved.
She have depression and he's ignoring it imagine giving birth to 3 kids in just 5 years that's like working as a baby producer machine. Yeah what she did is bad but that's just the result of her depression she needs someone by her side she can rely on but he's too indifferent it's only natural she felt so lonely and wanted attention she's a woman after all
she just wants a fraction of that love herself. it also stated that he favors his daughter to the point where his other children are feeling it too. that's not right.
So you say that the mother doesn't deserve love once she has children ? She is not a human beings with feelings too after she has had children ?
the masked woman Where did I say anything like that?
Diana Taran you should look at both sides. She became like that because of him, he lacks communication so the wife won't know what he is feeling or doing. However that doesn't mean that she is the right one
I really like this show, because of the MCs
i'm really shocked when he say that he didn't love his wife again 😧
This is so heartbreaking cause I feel like she only started to drink because of her post partum depression and I think her depression and drinking problems aggravated after having two more kids . He should've been more understanding though but is not everyone who can deal with an alcoholic partner with psychological problems , most people just leaves and he seems to be the type of person who gives you a chance and if you screw up he is already done with you. I think that she will have to make a huge effort to win him over again, change her drinking habits and starts seeing a psychologist for this marriage to work, she will have to be more strong and is time for her to make him fall again and it won't be easy but I think he still has feelings for her and thinks she is pretty since they just had a newborn recently ... it will be hard really really hard since he is only staying married for the kids and thinks he doesn't love her anymore but is possible ... trying won't hurt anyone.
Just because he said he doesn’t love her anymore, lmbo thats nothing. People who love each other can say the most hurtful thing you can think of when they are angry. There is still love there for sure. He’s very disappointed and mistrusting of her right now. With the passing of her depression and working together they can legit be a bomb ass couple. Okrrrrr
I used to have a friend who is ignorance as this husband in a way now she never contact me anymore since High School
is there anyone notice that her husband is quite handsome? and knowing that he is a good husband, he is betther back to the market to get a better wife.
Ok I haven't even finished watching the whole thing but can I say I'm shook by the dude who's married and has a 5 year old + he's been married for seven years when he looks like 20 I'm???? Shook
when he said he don't love her,I was like OMG is he joking?
I think if your wife would hit you and yell at u , u would stop loving her too
Shes manipulative
Stop blaming the husband
@@mintstudent9442 yeah i know,it's just that it broke my heart to hear that from him :'(
@@queenbb4601 why does that breaks your heart??Like I can understand him. I would do the same as him
@@mintstudent9442 because I don't like it when there's no love in a family or between couple's,the man did the right thing but I don't know why i'm sad about it :-(
@@queenbb4601 bro she is abusing him
Me: "oh it's a cute guy...nevermind, he's a dad"
And this is the prime reason why you should always use protection! I dont know why she continued having so many children if she was stressed out. Alcohol is the main problem.
아이 낳은 엄마들은 다 이해하실거예요
육체적으로 정신적으로 얼마나 힘든지 게다가 직장일까지 하면 넘 지칩니다
결혼 전엔 상황
이 편하고 본인만 생각하고 살다가 아이가 셋이나 되니 본인 없어진건 진짜 오래되지 않았을까 생각됩니다
아내분 술이 문제가 아니라 많이 공감하고 다독여주고 집안 일 도와주면 술버릇 당장 없어집니다
The husband and his friends has known each other for 20 years now but the wife only has spent 7 or 8 years with the him as a couple.
It's already there. Spend more time with her, dude!
aw bruh my heart broke when he said he didn’t love her
I am lucky to have a great husband even were married now for almost 12 years it feels like were still young at heart and being sweet for each other.
Hearing that man saying that He doesnt love her anymore it break my heart. If you treat your wife like a princess then your wife will treat you like a king.
Cariad19 Byrne That is not always true