VTubers Are Not Your Friend【Mari Monday】

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  • čas přidán 8. 09. 2024
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    #mariyume #vtuber #vtuberen

Komentáře • 218

  • @MariYumeCh
    @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +50

    QUESTION - What would you like me to talk about next?

    • @QuemHarleyllen
      @QuemHarleyllen Před 3 měsíci +6

      I don't know if you've already talked about this, but talk about the types of Vtubers that exist!!

    • @Apocalypse_dbl20
      @Apocalypse_dbl20 Před 3 měsíci +3

      What about? Which vtubers are the types to be nice only when they need you and rude when they don't?

    • @kenric38
      @kenric38 Před 3 měsíci +2

      What do you do to ready yourself for a stream ?

    • @PatronusGaming83
      @PatronusGaming83 Před 3 měsíci +5

      The perception of male vtubers in the vtuber space.

    • @camedark
      @camedark Před 3 měsíci +3

      how to avoid getting cancelled and what topics are not to joke about

  • @aikoheartblossom
    @aikoheartblossom Před 3 měsíci +97

    you constantly getting distracted by the game while trying to stay on topic is so relatable.

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +23

      Partly that and also me taking a moment to think about what I want to say XD

  • @itsumoknight
    @itsumoknight Před 3 měsíci +56

    Funny story, do you know of an old classic called "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer"?
    In the story, Rudolph is a reindeer who's different from all the others because he has a red nose that can glow. Everyone in his community makes fun of and ostracizes him for being different. It is only in an extreme circumstance happens, when the community's godking Santa Claus is in need and happens to notice Rudolph, that this changes. After Rudolph proves himself capable and is recognized by Santa does his reindeer community celebrate him, for his glowing red nose.
    I get how it's supposed to be child-friendly, heartwarming, coming-of-age or whatever Christmas story; but dang, in a modern context I find this horrifying. Being recognized by authority and praised by the public is great and all, but the anxieties and rejection from before were real. Seeing people change their tune sucks because you know they'll change it again just as easily. Freakin' yikes.

  • @BlackClaws
    @BlackClaws Před 3 měsíci +38

    I mean, yeah. Vtubers are the near total strangers that I watch to make me laugh, smile, learn or even tear up a little now and then. Don't know any personally, that I know of, but they are paid performers, like actors, singers or comedians and this is their job. Honestly it looks like hard work and likely does not leave a lot of time for real friendship outside of that community.
    This was a good video.

  • @addamelechtouhou
    @addamelechtouhou Před 3 měsíci +31

    Holy moly I was totally not expecting you'd answer this one much less dedicating the whole video to it.
    It feels super weird to appear in a vtuber video as me being a layman non-content creator.
    Thank you very much, I am satisfied with the answer.
    Trying to summarize what I could gather from the reply.
    tldr: how does it feel to be sought after by others?
    - The autoperception doesn't change much because of gradual progression. Success doesn't feel like success because it's a continuum that's happening to you live so it gets constantly normalized.
    - There are 2 groups of people that tinge the optics in which you're perceived
    --- 1: other content creators either disagree with you because they're preocupied of constant growth and interactions fast but still seek your advice in an aspirational and platonic way not caring about the actual person. This point could be influenced by actual past experiences that raise your guard from incoming content creators that want to reach out for you.
    --- 2: non-content creators that enjoy your metatalk, since they have no numbers nor growth to be worried about, there's no conflict of interest and can see easily the human behind the content machine. Ironically the vtuber advice content won't apply to them lol
    I'll never become vtuber so I was surprised that you were surrounded by people that would take advantage of you but now that I think about it, it sadly makes sense.
    Everybody take care and make friends wisely,

  • @OkinoMuse
    @OkinoMuse Před 3 měsíci +21

    It just reminds me of the "wanna be friends" posts on twitter that are just engament bait and they will never actually care. I only replied to one of these that were from a super small artist! Him and I have actually been friends since and I'm happy to say he is an actual friend and not just someone who wants to use me in any way.
    It sucks, but making friends in vtubing is one of the most impossible things. People want you to do anything for them while never wanting to give back

  • @elenameister2544
    @elenameister2544 Před 3 měsíci +21

    Its honestly such a hard thing when you see people get jealous of you and dont work toward it.
    People dont understand that you have to put in work and enjoy it.
    I use to be super native and let people take advantage of me until i had enough and told my boundaries are more important.
    They'll be a day where fake people will show their TRUE colors.
    Being nice is always okay but people do have to understand that you will have to put your foot down and say and put your happiness first.
    Easier said than done but we learn, we adapt, and we overcome.
    You are amazing and you dont let anyone tell you otherwise.

  • @Apocalypse_dbl20
    @Apocalypse_dbl20 Před 3 měsíci +17

    You're seiso and are growing at an amazing rate! The advice you give to others should be seen as experience. The reason the smaller content creators think it's criticism is because they don't think about that you've been a small content creator before and then grew to a big one. Taking advantage of others is not ok, I hate people who do that and don't care about who they hurt. They have no shame at all. Keep up the amazing videos Mari.

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +12

      A lot of people forget I spent four years experimenting trying to grow XD

    • @Apocalypse_dbl20
      @Apocalypse_dbl20 Před 3 měsíci +2

      ​@MariYumeCh Yeah it might have been difficult but you worked hard to get where you are today. Work done by your own hands feels better than when someone else does it for you. When you say something about someone they should also view it as you are caring about them and trying to help them make better content.

    • @Ac3ofDr4gons
      @Ac3ofDr4gons Před 3 měsíci

      @@MariYumeChAnd you know what? Good on you for sticking with it. Lots of people would have given up before the end of their first year when they weren’t seeing the success they hoped to achieve.
      I’m a newcomer to your channel, but I find your videos interesting and easy to follow, so I personally think you’re doing a great job, and I hope you stick around and continue to grow for years to come. ♥️

  • @AuntieHauntieGames
    @AuntieHauntieGames Před 3 měsíci +8

    "What do you want me to tell you? That you're perfect and keep doing it? And then what? You don't grow?"
    God, *_thank you._*
    People are so uncomfortable with giving or receiving critique but honest and direct feedback is so important for creative development. I have a bunch of other creator friends here on CZcamsr who are bigger than me, and I eventually gave up on asking for suggestions because they are afraid of hurting my feelings.
    Like guys, if I'm cooking dinner and I dump an entire cup of salt into the food, are you gonna sit there and eat something inedible with a smile while telling me it's great?
    Augh. It makes me miss my university art and media professors.

  • @DatJaneDoe
    @DatJaneDoe Před 3 měsíci +29

    4:50 Trying to get a big expensive model to become successful is ironic when you consider the two largest indie VTubers are Vedal who uses a simple turtle model, and Filian who uses a cheap VR chat model called Rindo.
    EDIT: Thought Rindo was free because some folk who modded tue model into other games claimed it was. I changed it to cheap model

    • @Sorias_Sire
      @Sorias_Sire Před 3 měsíci +15

      Rindo is not and never was free-use, it's very much a paid booth model that you have to pay for but it is relatively cheap compared to an actual custom model costing only 7000 yen which google says is only around $45 and this is of course excluding all the clothing for it that Fillian also bought from booth but still pretty cheap

    • @TenshiKisai
      @TenshiKisai Před 3 měsíci +1

      Rindo is not "free". Rindo is a paid model from Jingo, there are terms you have to agree to for it's use, you can find Jingo on Booth. Jingo also made the model that AICandii started with (called EYO), that was modified.
      Filian also uses a model named "Mint", which is also a paid model.
      Some models on Booth permit modifications. The Jingo models actually have anatomy textures/blendshapes that you can't actually use to stream with (TOS)/can't include as a Japanese seller (required censorship of anatomy.)
      It also has to be pointed out that the models are designed for VRChat. When they are used in programs like VSeeFace/VNyan, you can't toggle the VRChat functionality, which results in loading Rindo with two outfits overlapping each other.

  • @kythekaalyn3541
    @kythekaalyn3541 Před 3 měsíci +5

    The thing I found about content creation is that a lot of people think their content is a lot better than what it actually is. And there's a disconnect there where they think they deserve success from the time spent and its just not the case
    Also congrats on the 100k! 🎉

  • @TheRecluseOtaku
    @TheRecluseOtaku Před 3 měsíci +8

    Mari has done the impossible, She has started to make me look forward to Mondays.

  • @gammathefool
    @gammathefool Před 3 měsíci +12

    Me: see the word "friend"
    Suspicious
    To be fair, I've always found the term "friend" to be dubious, some people like to throw it around so causally, then there are people like me where a "friend" is like a member of an exclusive club or a secert society
    The long and short, "friend" is a word that has such a flimsy meaning

  • @firesedge
    @firesedge Před 3 měsíci +7

    Congrats on 100K! Also you seem to have a (sadly) very acute knowledge of this, but the world of entertainment is a nasty and competitive place. Too many people seem to have this impression that the only way to succeed is to tear someone else down. I know it's hard to not let that effect you, but I hope it doesn't dampen your joy for doing this. I enjoy watching your content. I appreciate what you're trying to do, even if I am not actively doing content creation at the moment, it's nice to get a frank and honest take one the subject. I feel you do a very good job of setting realistic expectations for the people who watch you. You can't please everyone, all you can do is offer them the opportunity to make themselves happy and hope they don't squander it, lol. Now hurry up on your next 100K! Break a leg kid!

  • @MidKitz
    @MidKitz Před 3 měsíci +5

    Congrats on 100k!!
    You really nailed this discussion, some people really want to either jump on or off trends...I've lost some friends so many times that they act like they're "better than you" or punch down at me.
    Those people I cut out of my life.
    It's seriously insane they will turn their back and say awful stuff, then come back to act like they actually care.
    Keep being you and doing what you're doing!

  • @SalviVtuber
    @SalviVtuber Před 3 měsíci +7

    you are growing because you are being yourself and you can see that there is passion behind it

  • @EzraXerosVods
    @EzraXerosVods Před 3 měsíci +4

    Everything in this video is so true, it really makes me think. Especially the last part. Like im not a big vtuber rather small but I truly do understand how ya feel.
    Don't waste time on people who don't care.
    Also don't care about numbers.
    Just have fun and learn and surround yourself with people who care about you, dont use people to get to the top just enjoy being where you are in the moment and actually be truthful with people you want to be friends with.

  • @trolleymouse
    @trolleymouse Před 3 měsíci +2

    I've found that, 80% of the time, when someone tells you what they hate about you? They're actually telling you what they think will hurt you the most.

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci

      Very true. Ppl are bitter most of the timr

  • @kyaunaalonzo681
    @kyaunaalonzo681 Před 2 měsíci +1

    You're one of the reasons I have faith in starting my own and am working on my own model right now. Idk what trash they could be talking because you're awesome.

  • @Tivvv3
    @Tivvv3 Před 3 měsíci +1

    9:05 pretty much LOL. Although between knowing why you do something, being decent at doing it and being decent at getting the word out there's a lot that can go wrong. Like having thought patterns that blind you to what you're missing. Best of luck on your journey whoever reads this!

  • @DracNeedsChai
    @DracNeedsChai Před 3 měsíci +1

    I think, in addition to the term ‘friend’ meaning different things to different people…you really have to communicate what being a friend means to each person who calls you that.
    To one person, you may be a ‘friend’ who’s more like a coworker or acquaintance, and then youll have a ‘friend’ you wish was almost family to you and that you talk to nearly every day.
    It takes trust with friendships, same goes for any relationship. It’s a lot emotionally, but we find ways to work with what we’re given.
    If any of that makes sense.

  • @Gibbsi
    @Gibbsi Před 2 měsíci +1

    I was watching this while working on my vtuber model in live2d and had to stop by and say you are doing so great i havent been subscribed for long but you opened my eyes to not do a huge debut and just make an about me page instead. You are so cool and deserve all the support and more!!!! XXX

  • @ndr2q
    @ndr2q Před 3 měsíci +2

    Big congrats on the 100k Mari! ❤
    You’ve worked hard and given us so much good advice, and you deserve every bit of your success.

  • @nimrodm8798
    @nimrodm8798 Před 3 měsíci +2

    Congrats on 100k!!!🎉
    Super well expressed, honestly I feel this doesn’t just limit to the VTuber or entertainment industry, after all most of my friends from late teens to now were much like this or many who joined existing friend groups were just there to mooch off of my intelligent or well off and successful friends before leaving after a couple of months.

  • @GinnyVT
    @GinnyVT Před 3 měsíci +1

    Hi Mari, I just wanted to say that I find your content very honest and open and I know it is hard to put yourself out there. I mean you’re right and so many points. The way I see the problem is is the vtuber community is just the same as the real world community. There’s good people and bad people. And if people don’t want to take the time to know you and get to know you and be your real friend then is it really worth the effort of letting them hurt you all the time. Trust me I speak from experience and other parts of my past life. I’ve had a lot of mental health issues and honestly, I can’t remember before I was 16. My memories When I was 16 1/2. Not trying to do that for any pity trip or anything. I’m just saying I know how bad people can be. And I’m glad to see people out there like you and truly want to help people and it sickens me that people abuse your trust like that. one VTuber that has medical issues that inspired me as well as you. You are one of the two my heroes in vtubing. I know I will never be famous. I’m not looking to be famous. I’m not even really looking to make friends in it. I wanna be vtuber because I find it fun. Being able to be somebody that you wanna be whether your cat, or a mouse, a whale, a dragon. I mean there are so many VTuber options out there. That’s who they wanna be with they can be who they wanna be without trashing others in my opinion. Really sad to see that even in the community that this kind of stuff still happens. I haven’t even gotten a model yet. And just gonna be starting out by the end of the year hopefully. But again all I’m doing is just wanting to have fun. Have a fun little persona for myself while I play on my favorite games. In the end, I think your own happiness and what makes you happy is the most important. I will not let people carry me down because they think I’m weird or whatever. I’m not doing anything to hurt them so if they have a problem that’s OK that’s their thing. I think the idea of somebody that wants to have fun and worked up the courage put themselves out there in front of the public is an admirable thing. And I am I am very admired by the amount of work you put into it with your talents. And I just want you to know that there are VTubers out there that admire you for what you do and who you are you are a revolutionary VTuber and my humble opinion.
    Hoping to see more of your video content in the future, and stay strong my hero.

  • @yiuminghuynh5252
    @yiuminghuynh5252 Před 3 měsíci +1

    I think you're growing because you're 100% relatable. You'll eventually reach that point where your core values are going to be challenged, but I hope you get to remain who you are as you grow and not get carried away with what people think of you.

  • @karisoleil
    @karisoleil Před 3 měsíci +1

    My first childhood crush was on Olivia the cat in Gamecube Animal Crossing. And she was a HUGE JERK! But I wanted so desperately to be her friend, which perhaps is why I find the fact you're playing Animal Crossing while talking about this so fitting.
    Most of my friends as a vtuber are people I knew from before I started vtubing. I think it's hard because often people are trying to "use" each other, which I think is actually fine as long as all parties are transparent about it. Like be collaborators/coworkers! (Which iirc, you've talked about in a past video!) There's nothing wrong with that! There are many types of relationships in this world, and I think one of the pitfalls a lot of us fall into (myself included) is assuming anyone who is nice to you automatically can be considered a friend. Which distorts your expectations if they're not wanting to be your friend...
    Though of course, while I think it's fine for vtubers to view other vtubers as collaborators rather than friends, people shouldn't go around using people without any disclaimer nor with any intention of returning the favor in what ways they can. Like getting close to a more successful vtuber solely to get attention is in very poor taste. Maybe it all comes down to treating each other as humans with whom we can exchange ideas and have fun with, rather than stepping stones?
    Anyway, please keep up the great work!!! I love your videos and advice so much and even logged into CZcams so I could finally subscribe lol. In this house we care Mari and KNOW she's full of good wisdom💕

  • @nevisysbryd7450
    @nevisysbryd7450 Před 3 měsíci +1

    A lot of this is not so much creator stuff as people stuff. Most people got their hand out, most people do not want to face their responsibility for their outcomes and will resent you if you make it obvious to them.
    Social networking and hierarchy is one of the primary motivators for most human behavior, often subconsciously or unconsciously. Parasocial work like v-tubing also selects for a higher intensity of it than the general population-it is part of the appeal for a lot of the people who are liable to pursue it in the first place.
    Haters gonna hate and envy is a helluva drug. Authenticity and sincerity are profoundly valuable.
    Congratulations on the milestone!

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      Thank you for the insightful response!!! It’s interesting how a lot of this bleeds into creative works too

    • @nevisysbryd7450
      @nevisysbryd7450 Před 3 měsíci

      @@MariYumeCh You are welcome!
      Yeah, especially if it is particularly public-facing. By current personality science, creativity largely corresponds to Openness to Experience... which tends towards a (weak) negative correlation with Consciousness, ie, work ethic and sense of duty. Ie, creative types as a whole tend to be bit less on the disciplined side, whereas it is extremely easy for outsiders to take the effort involved in creative success for granted. Art is the communication of gratitude and gratitude demands much more diligence than people often realize.

  • @WispSophie
    @WispSophie Před 2 měsíci

    Wow. I'm very new to the creation sphere, and CZcamsrs / Vtubers like you are what I'm looking up to. I love that you did your own thing and do it your way. You had to start somewhere and work your butt off to get here. I can strive for that. You help motivate me. I'm sorry others talked bad of you to try to grow, but I'm glad your still doing your thing.
    Question: What's another channel that helps inspire you?

  • @TheLeonard625
    @TheLeonard625 Před 3 měsíci +1

    25:53 i worry about you Mari when you're down not cause i pity you cause i care about you lol you're always doing your best and constantly improving while being kind and respectful and always helping others you are an amazing person and content creator ❤

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci

      Thank you leon ❤ I really am trying to improve as much as I can!!

  • @racasillas1
    @racasillas1 Před 3 měsíci +1

    Thank you Mari! Nice video! 😊

  • @xiaomin-d7v
    @xiaomin-d7v Před 3 měsíci +1

    CONGRATULATIONS MARI 100K LETS GOOOO

  • @NataliaAkashiya
    @NataliaAkashiya Před 3 měsíci

    I definitely appreciate you talking about collabing. There is a definitely a feeling that I HAVE TO collab with other people when really... you don't. Your audience will be there for YOU not just for the people that you play with.
    Thank you Mari. As a new content creator, I appreciate you and your honesty!

  • @Alstroemeria9997
    @Alstroemeria9997 Před 2 měsíci

    Sad to hear you had to deal with so many vultures, sad to hear there's apparently a lot of that. I definitely feel reminded to be cautious of peoples motivations and their yellow-red flags

  • @FairyNya
    @FairyNya Před 2 měsíci +1

    maybe it's because i don't interact with many "aspiring vtubers", but i haven't really met *that* many people that fame hunts so hard that they are willing to make content not because they like it but because they want to be famous. but then again, i don't really go out of my own friend group too much lol, so maybe i have an availability heuristic bias

  • @mimiko_chunn
    @mimiko_chunn Před 3 měsíci

    Ive been following u for almost 2 years i guess , ur early videos of how to make a vtuber model was my first video and im happy to have watched u grow so much, watching u do commentaries and so much more always gave me a nice perspective of what vtubers are and in that process i have grown fond of u , of others dont understand ur commentary its not for them but i personally enjoy it and ill always be here to watch u even if i dont comment alot u were the first person to teach me how to make a vtuber model and ill always be grateful for u and always will be here to support u! Thank you for being my light in the vtuber community

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      I’m happy to know you’ve been around since the old days. It’s so interesting seeing how time flys❤

  • @Karuyine
    @Karuyine Před 3 měsíci

    This video helped me a lot in getting some of my goals straight and gave a lot more confidence.
    Have to say though, I think one of the main reasons people change when they become bigger isn't necessarily because they feel "better" or something like that, but because they might have more of an actual personality to say it in a way. What I mean, like I haven't started doing something, but I know that I'll act in a way when I start, but after just the first video/stream I do I will probably act way different, and when it goes after a month, year or more it will surely make drastic changes, this is probably because when someone starts doing this, their "type of content" (not quite type of content) is very malleable so it *WILL* in most cases, have drastic changes in the start

  • @twilite92
    @twilite92 Před měsícem

    Thank you for this video its the truth even in irl and i admire every person that does what they want to that makes them happy and have fun

  • @tygerluna
    @tygerluna Před měsícem

    It makes me sad that people treat you so poorly in this community. Thank you for another great video! 💜💜

  • @Starrky923
    @Starrky923 Před 3 měsíci

    really glad you are managing to deal with the bad thoughts that pop up in your head and dealing with fake friends. Creates a great character

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      the best medicine is surrounding yourself with supportive people and focusing on those who care

    • @Starrky923
      @Starrky923 Před 3 měsíci

      @@MariYumeCh can't relate but glad it works! It's awesome seeing you grow as a person and creator alike

  • @elderstar
    @elderstar Před 3 měsíci

    I have been following your content for a while and please know I have taken your keen words of wisdom to heart. You have a no nonsense, no holds bar approach that I admire. People don't want to hear the truth when they should, so you shouldn't take what some nay sayers chitter about to heart. You have more influence than you realize and a lot of people have your back and support you for being you.

  • @DaringTakekawaYT
    @DaringTakekawaYT Před 3 měsíci

    Thank you for this video, I really needed to hear this and agree 100% with everything you said.

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      I’m glad it could help you!!❤

  • @raimyonlinewarrior236
    @raimyonlinewarrior236 Před 3 měsíci

    I didn't knew you were treated this way.
    I did find your content fun to watch and informative.
    Ngl i like your videos more than your streams but it's easy to see the effort you place on them.
    Sorry to hear about your struggles and keep on being you.

  • @SmolSoybean_
    @SmolSoybean_ Před 3 měsíci

    Aww Mari, I look up to you! Thanks to your content I have taken all the advice and am attempting to apply to my journey. I can understand how lonely it feels starting out especially when no one wants to pay mind to you for various reasons as you stated. But, I remain optimistic and keep trying everyday to grow as a creator! Keep up the wonderful content and work!

  • @BaranzarCobralVOD
    @BaranzarCobralVOD Před 3 měsíci

    Content is king as they say, also sorry to hear people have been treating you terribly, you seem really nice and genuine and personally I have found your advice helpful 😊 so thank you for doing what you do.

  • @raydarl0ve251
    @raydarl0ve251 Před 3 měsíci

    I couldn't say if most people copy others for the sake of success. But it's imitation for the sake of survival. And to be fair, no one is an originality themselves. Biologically speaking, we are the best and the worst habits of our parents. We're basically a clone of our parents. We are their Mini-Me! People just try to emulate on what they see and how it makes them feel. Leverage on what they learned to thrive in a harsh world. But... it's those that put their own spin on it that truly thrive!

  • @liselecika
    @liselecika Před 3 měsíci

    Congratulations on 100k Mari! I just realized I’ve discovered you three years ago and you kept trying out new things and new concepts too and I’m very happy for you ☺️ I didn’t watch all your videos as I don’t have much time to do so (sorry :c), but I can say your Mari Mondays are very interesting to watch or even listen to as podcasts!
    But yeah, your work pays off and you can be proud of yourself ☺️

  • @tray2000
    @tray2000 Před 3 měsíci

    Because of you, I have made my first ever the tuber and I learned a lot of stuff coming from me that I’m gonna put into the future and learning

  • @derrygorl
    @derrygorl Před 2 měsíci

    I come from the art community and have just recently become really interested with vtubers and you're one of the channels I'm currently binging! I just wanna say, what you talked about is very common with all types of people in the influencer world, no matter what community they belong to. I've met so many in the art community who are like that~ for them, your Instagram/twitter follower count defines you which is sooooo out of touch!!! It's just so dumb 😂

  • @yeckiLP
    @yeckiLP Před 3 měsíci

    Occasional Viewer here! Thank you for trying to be honest and kind, I feel we need more of that in this current world. It sucks that people try and take advantage of you for it. Toolbox friendships (what I have just decided to call them) can hurt REALLY badly and I also had the unfortunate pleasure to be that wrench in a toolbox until they changed to a different bolt size and I was no longer useful. As I have trouble initiating anything (projects/conversations/the whole rest of that Spiel) I am often worried that I seem like one of the toolbox friends as well. A fear that is probably slowing my progress on clawing my self out from some mental health issues, but hey it ain't alone and fortunately enough, neither am I, I have had the fortune to develop some strong friendships.. but even with those I have a hard time asking for help in a dire time.
    I do like to give advice (though more often than not I am lacking in anything useful)
    Another standard response of mine is trying to remind people that other points of view exist and that some of them may seem arbitrary/ pointlessly harmful, but SOME of those can be misunderstandings born of innocently intentioned interactions (your advice/critique example is an illustrious example of one of those)
    I probably belief too heavily in "the good of people"/ "allowing for personal growth leading to changes of hearts" (probably a non-zero percent of those toolboxfriend interactions had been them changing as a person for the better and simply not remembering all of their past misdeeds, though it's definitely closer to zero than to even 25% unfortunately) and similar concepts.
    I'll also mention, that genuinely nice communities / content creator pairings have either become more frequent of a thing, or I am just only now getting to know more of them. So while the bleak sucky side of humans grows more noticeably, it's not alone in doing so.
    Thanks again for being part of one of those pairings (both Mari and whoever was nice enough to read this/ really even if they didn't the rest of this community as well) it is another lit candle in the dark for me even if I, by merit of how I function seldom linger to receive the warmth, the light already is a heart healing presence.

  • @deannlefay
    @deannlefay Před měsícem

    half way thru the vid i didnt pay attention to anything you say, my whole existence are focused at those cute flappy ears😭

  • @axelhugh4609
    @axelhugh4609 Před 3 měsíci

    Just wanted to say I enjoyed this rambling episode!

  • @Gethyst
    @Gethyst Před 3 měsíci +1

    By the way, congratulations on 100k🎉🎉🎉

  • @TobiArts
    @TobiArts Před 3 měsíci

    Reminds me of the reading whole new sentences into statements tweet. You saying that you can succeed by making waffles isn't saying you shouldn't be making pancakes!!

  • @MalfetKiren
    @MalfetKiren Před 3 měsíci +1

    For the point of a lot of people saying you NEED an expensive model, i am in the process of drawing my own Vtuber model, i know the quality of it won't be near what the "expensive models" are, but i don't care, i belive i will become successfull as a Vtuber even if my model is bad or scuffed. If people like what i do they'll come back anyways.

  • @HexaDecimus
    @HexaDecimus Před 16 dny

    First rime viewer here, i just stumbled upon your channel. Unfortunate to know you have so much drama from others. Also love the animation on the ears.

  • @SilasCaelumVT
    @SilasCaelumVT Před 3 měsíci

    It's very hard to find streamer friends that you can actually be friends with. There's some communities (that I won't name) where it really is about clout chasing and they won't talk to you, work with you, or show equal attention to you on stream during collabs. Either you are not big enough for them to have an interest, or you are a guest on their little show. I have one friend that I can collab with and have good synergy. Because even though we are both streamers, and different sizes, our friendship always comes first. Rare to find. And it's really hard to trust other content creators. Usually it's never genuine friendship. ANOTHER big thing creators don't realize, is that just because you find a way onto a bigger creator's stream and/or video, doesn't mean their audience is going to check you out and be on your stuff. That's why Twitch raids are not as incredible as people think they are.

  • @AriesTemporis
    @AriesTemporis Před 3 měsíci +2

    11:16 i used to have a past life where i was doing all kinds of lewd content in like... 2020 i believe? i wasn't big or successful at all and i struggled to find any meaning or motivation in what i was doing, entirely because i was just doing what i thought ppl wanted from me. i saw others making so much lewd content and i just wanted to fit in, yknow?
    part of the reason why i chose to take up my current muppet identity is because this is something i can actually be passionate about, something i can actually enjoy, without feeling pressured to make stuff that caters entirely to a hypothetical audience. i can focus on just making what i like making and not stress out too much about it
    i don't think it's a bad thing at all to grow your audience in a sfw way, and simply pointing that out isn't shitting on lewd tubers! if that's what you're passionate about, you should chase it! the goal should be making something YOU enjoy making, not what everyone else wants to see!

  • @VanilleVixen
    @VanilleVixen Před 3 měsíci

    Hi I've decided to YAP once again because you're videos are always so amazing and I love listening to them. These are genuinely the videos where I pause and type my thoughts because it really gets my brain going /positive
    I'm only 13:00 in but you've worded everything incredibly well and I wanted to give my 2 cents on it because it genuinely is very true and something I even struggled with in my earlier vtubing years!
    People want to be perfect, and the thing is, when people tell them they can experiment, or try different things, it creates this ideology sometimes that "I'm not good enough, that's why they're saying that" Then they get very defensive about it. People want to go online and create content, but as soon as they get criticized, they don't want to change! They want to be viewed as if they're good enough, and I think that can be a reason people want to create in the first place: to feel good enough. And when they don't...its either defensive behavior in which they don't want to listen to the other half, or extremely critical of themselves.
    Advice can end up sounding like Critique when your not in the right headspace for it! Some people think they're in the right headspace until they get told, then self doubt comes int
    That goes into another point to: People don't want to try to learn new skills. As sad as it is, a lot of people do struggle with depression, and seeing hope for the future. It can also create this mindset of "well, I'm already bad, why try? it's not going to make a difference..."
    Content creation can be used as a way to escape and when someone feels judged its no longer an escape, it feels like the spotlight is on you and you're failing. Especially in vtubing, where your showing off a version of yourself that's either more true to who you are, or more idealized to what other people want, and people criticize either way
    So when someone thinks they are 'making good content' but gets told they aren't, its a lot of emotions! Perfectionism, Defensiveness, Anger, grasping at straws, etc. It's more so a lot of people need to learn that some criticism is ok, and its not an attack on your character. Get criticism from the people who are giving GOOD criticism rather than bad. Some people do want to help, but if your in the mindset of not meeting standards, or vulnerable...it can be a lot.
    Content creation can help you get thick skin, while learning to be more of yourself, and half the time when people are creators, they aren't there yet. They let those things get to them, rather than try to push themselves to be better FOR themselves. Theres a HUGE mindset difference whenever you create for yourself vs the wider audience.
    --
    ~ 14:00 "it boggles my mind when i see people who don't like making content, become content creators" ITS SO TRUE MY GOD, people think its an easy cash grab...or the attention, and it's insane to my own brain to. I love creating characters! I love making outfits! I love making things pretty! I love making content that makes people smile or learn from, etc!! That's what its all about!!
    --
    ~ 19:00 I'm a creator that has major anxiety, I talk about it often because i want my space to be very mental health friendly, but I've had people shut me down or think I'm weird because I genuinely don't know how to conversate or get things started...I can ramble on for hours with the right people, but in the vtubing space, or any space, its so critical, even to people who genuinely struggle with that. If people can't get a step up from you, it feels like they won't give you interaction. Theres people I would love to reach out and talk to, but I fear my anxious thoughts, or way i interact at first, would immediately kill it. Because Its genuinely so hard for me to reach out, people have taken that as I have a 'holier than thou' view, when I really don't...Im a masters student with anxiety and that makes it hard to reach out as a whole..i never get upset if people don't message or talk, because I realize how busy life can get, but its hard to get that same understanding in return
    --
    ~ 27:00 I want that in my own community to! I want people to be nice, and be kind to one another. To talk to each other and create a good vibe!
    ~ 28:00 The disconnect between how people see you vs how you see yourself is crazy...For example. I love waifu's, I love pretty people and art. But for example, if I play Azur lane, people think I like them in a sexual way when I really love the art, the composition, etc (you can find things pretty without it being sexual). Some people see me as someone with a hero complex as well, when I just talk about the knowledge I've learned from my Clinical Counseling courses because I want that knowledge to be more wide spread....and don't get me started on Instagram comments when I give knowledge about that subject as well (spoiler alert: everyone's 'cooked' or they say they're going to do something awful cause of me :/) all in all, despite how much we may want to genuinely do good, or love things a certain way, the disconnect is going to be there regardless based on everyone's perceptions until they get to know you,,,if they even want to know you at all
    --
    I always love your videos mari, they are genuinely so relatable and it sparks good conversation and though-provoking things about my content, my own community, and me as a person. I wish the world wasn't so judgemental, but the people who do enjoy your content, wholly support you.
    It's not your fault if people take things in a critical way, more so, its the mindset of the person themselves, who wishes to be perfect but doesn't want to do anything to improve

  • @RareAngelz
    @RareAngelz Před 3 měsíci

    I'm enjoying the Mari Mondays. I like to listen to you while playing my video games.

  • @dusk4410
    @dusk4410 Před 3 měsíci

    100k! That’s a lot of people 😊 Mari is proof that hard work pays off

  • @SiauwAdhie
    @SiauwAdhie Před 3 měsíci +1

    While me just a casual content creator without much consistency and most of the time people that chats in my stream are only consisting of mostly whom I think are my friends OuO\
    I guess the bigger your number the less you can make actual friends..

  • @burn422
    @burn422 Před 3 měsíci +1

    People will always find a way to complain
    While success come to whose who are following an advise from the richest duck in the world "work harder then the hardest and smarter then the smartest"

  • @AlcorSalvador
    @AlcorSalvador Před 3 měsíci +2

    Don't worry about trying to not offend people. Anything you say can be twisted into something to complain about. Those kinds of people are called instigators, and if those same people consistently refuse to accept things in a positive way then they are just straight up goblins. Ignore them, just do you. Censoring yourself by walking on eggshells is no way to live life. o7

  • @lunascomments3024
    @lunascomments3024 Před 3 měsíci

    one of the earliest mari subscriber here! less than 90 subs to 100k! WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY 100K MARI!!!!

  • @hunterwolfaVODS
    @hunterwolfaVODS Před 3 měsíci

    - waves from very far away - I know you're probably going to ignore this because so many messages but I do see your points recently watching your content a lot and been learning and understanding what means to be a content creator I still start to learn how to do editing stuff but really do want to start and try it as well I hope you continue grow as you doing and don't listen to anybody or let anyone use you you're an amazing content creator and continue enjoy to learn new things and watch your works so yeah I hope you have a wonderful beautiful time stay safe and everybody here too happy times zone everybody >w>/

  • @Cosmic_Tori
    @Cosmic_Tori Před 3 měsíci

    I haven't been a part of the Vtubing community for long and I have to agree with all the points made. I wish your old friends had taken you seriously as a content creator because you really are amazing at what you do. I always tell my friends you're my Vtuber Oshi and a huge inspiration to me (been watching you since way before I became a vtuber). I wish more Vtubers used content creation as a way to be creative, helpful or entertaining while doing something they love instead of as a means to be popular while having to follow these weird unspoken rules about what it means to be a Vtuber. The truth is there are no rules and it's okay to think outside the box.

  • @notsoluckystar3306
    @notsoluckystar3306 Před 3 měsíci

    How do you stop and start your train of thought back up like that bro for me its like a complete derailing that takes another few minutes to get back on track thats so cool

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      A lot of practice and occasionally writing down notes to keep myself on track

  • @AngusMan_
    @AngusMan_ Před 3 měsíci

    I love the word misconstrude

  • @Dysune
    @Dysune Před 3 měsíci

    It is difficult to make genuine friendships these days. Usually new ones come and go, easily fizzling out on day in the early stages of developing one. It can be a little demotivating. But it just happens, just didnt click is all.
    Also it being a numbers game these days seem to show that people out here are in it to win while others out there trying. I had my fair share of messy situation and fake friendships. But hey, we learn from them time to time. It is considered an experience and to be more careful for next time.
    Nothing wrong in trying again but at your own pace. Can never be TOO careful, and it is true that a lot of Vtubers are afraid to fail when one piece of content being posted doesn't farm. I am like that as well, also lack of motivation played a part too.
    But other than that, I am sorry you been through a lot and I hope your day is treating you well and the days ahead of you will treat you with fortune.
    You deserve it, wish you best of luck and a blessful day! ♡

  • @ItMeSleepyTV
    @ItMeSleepyTV Před 3 měsíci

    You picked the best game to play for this topic. Also congrats on 100k!!!

  • @marikostarkov
    @marikostarkov Před 3 měsíci

    Congrats on 100k :3

  • @MovieSonicYT
    @MovieSonicYT Před 3 měsíci

    (This might be weird to see a SonicTuber commenting on this video ;;) I have been looking into doing vtubing myself, and I’ve seen some of the vids you’ve uploaded along with this one. And these are very helpful! I do have a question on where I should start with vtubing. On a social platform, like do I debut it on Twitch or CZcams? What is the best way to get the VTuber out there for people to see?

  • @Meleeman011
    @Meleeman011 Před 3 měsíci

    mari is real, and yeah. you're working on growing yeah, you do have a lot of good advice on growing, my friends treat me differently when money is involved lol. money can really affect people around you, internet points can do same ig. i try to focus on engagement, and stuff i think is funny, and shitposting lol. i have anxiety about my life half the time so its hard to come up with good ideas, inspiration is such a weird and difficult thing to find, and not everything finds what you think is interesting, but idk i feel like what you're doing is good, and i don't know why anyone would want to replicate you, people gotta find the thing that people like about you and thats the best version of yourself. use it to be the best version of yourself i think
    i had no idea you had anime night tho omfg..

  • @sayachan6069
    @sayachan6069 Před 3 měsíci +1

    Vtubers are not my friend? Well then I'm not getting them a christmas present now.

  • @luuk3731
    @luuk3731 Před 2 měsíci

    I'm a bit late, but I think I have this exact problem so I'm just going to comment.
    I get emotionally attached to people too easily. People I met online is no exception, even if I know that I'm the only one who thinks like that. Thanks for sharing some opinions on related topic,

  • @funniestdudeontheweb
    @funniestdudeontheweb Před 3 měsíci

    the irony of talking about how some become vtubers to make friends with that title.

  • @Giri1412
    @Giri1412 Před 3 měsíci

    The thing abt all this is that people don’t exactly know where the line is about if a person is being nice or is trying to be a friend.
    Side point - as much as you do see yourself that you are being judged , there is a percent of viewers who are appreciative of what you do

  • @MirageCross
    @MirageCross Před 3 měsíci

    As a wise master once said “There is no secret ingredient”. It’s understandable to be cautious around people who claim that wanna be your friend if you have to question their intentions. It also sucks that the only way to find out is to let them in and see what happens. Not letting people in at all isn’t great to do either but we gotta stay aware and realize whether a person is a friend or just using you for their own benefit.

  • @GravyTheGator
    @GravyTheGator Před 3 měsíci

    Interesting video.
    I guess my question is something that might be a really vague question. What is good content? Like someone could be like "Good content does numbers" or "Good content makes you happy" But it's just weird for me to wrap my head around. I sometimes don't know if I am suppose to be a content creator because I like making content but not so much that I'm mad addicted to it. I enjoy occasionally making funny shorts and streaming. I like streaming because people come hang out and I'm legit lonely, IRL most people around me are not the kind of people I want to hang out with. Sorry if this comes off as too trauma dumpy but it's just a question I am constantly asking myself is "What is good content?"

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      i honestly think good content really comes down to the person whos watching it getting some kind of value out of it (education, motivation, inspiration, or entertainment)

    • @GravyTheGator
      @GravyTheGator Před 3 měsíci

      @@MariYumeCh I guess maybe a more accurate question is how do YOU(the creator) know the content is good I guess. Maybe it's still a numbers thing. Thanks for the reply.

  • @savruenvod
    @savruenvod Před 2 měsíci

    I honestly dont think that "using" someone isnt that bad as long as u provide and consider value to chosen individual to make it beneficial to both of u

  • @just_lovvyyy
    @just_lovvyyy Před 2 měsíci

    Mari I look up to u rlly ILYSM NO MATTER WHAT I LOVE U RLLY I AM UR FAN SINCE 2022 🥹🥹 i rlly want to be ur friend i can rlly relate

  • @XanaGon
    @XanaGon Před 2 měsíci

    i love mari monday

  • @KokoroHana
    @KokoroHana Před 3 měsíci

    I think whats going on is the following things:
    1.People assume that you have to follow the trends and always act a certain way to get attention, but its okay to act like yourself and what you want to create for your audience.
    2. Its okay to take advice from your audience of what to do with content, but also its what you want to do and what makes you happy. Its hard to please everyone and sometimes makes you feel bad, but in reality its what really makes you happy, being humble and what you make of it.
    3. And finally, i feel like people wanna grow very fast because they see certain content creators grow very fast but in reality it takes a long while to get used to making creative content and also forget about that its a journey to improve your craft and treating it as a success if you get the formula of how you want to grow as a content creator. Always enjoy in what you wanna do and what makes you happy instrad of listening to negativity.
    Sorry im rambling here, but this is a very good video. Really needed this reasurance that its okay for me to enjoy the content journey at my own pace and feel like myself in the creative space.
    Thank you Mari for the advice as always!! 😊

  • @jaiden087
    @jaiden087 Před 3 měsíci

    That's what I'm saying and I will never understand why so many VTubers dislike doing it?? I have a feeling it's maybe an attention thing where a VTuber would rather want people to just watch their streams rather than working for the viewership and audience that comes with content creation. l15:46

  • @LCC.Gaming
    @LCC.Gaming Před 3 měsíci

    Congrats on 100K Mari!!!

  • @xiaomin-d7v
    @xiaomin-d7v Před 3 měsíci

    i dont use anyone if i work with someone i treat them like family

  • @chirioneVT
    @chirioneVT Před 3 měsíci

    Oh yeh. Had an experience where someone we thought was a friend started advertising their own streams and videos to us in copy pasted DMs. After months of talking about numbers and how she was going to have to stop streaming it felt like all she was doing was trying to up her algorithm telling us to boost her.
    She rarely spoke to us other than these types of DMs.
    Eventually we told her she was making us feel like we had no value other than views and to stop DMing us about going to watch and like her videos. She went into guilt trip mode and used the typical manipulation of "Im sorry im so shit, ill just never DM you again". So we blocked her from DMs.

  • @DragonzDen
    @DragonzDen Před 3 měsíci

    I have social anxiety disorder and I really want to become a vtuber but it makes me really anxious, which sucks :T

  • @aikoheartblossom
    @aikoheartblossom Před 3 měsíci

    your vibe attracts your tribe, my dear. people are always gonna hate on you. you can't please everyone.

    • @MariYumeCh
      @MariYumeCh  Před 3 měsíci +1

      Hahaha I'm glad to hear it!!!! You're right, you can't please everyone

  • @xiaomin-d7v
    @xiaomin-d7v Před 3 měsíci

    IF YOUR HAVING FUN THATS WHAT MATTERS

  • @rocvan8190
    @rocvan8190 Před 3 měsíci

    It's a good heads up for everyone in this topic. I think the only people you can call friends are people who meet in real life and look at them directly in their eyes. Of course, you can have good interactions online, but it's not the same as meeting people in real life; also, of course, not always can be friends with people even if you meet them IRL.

  • @magicadenka
    @magicadenka Před 3 měsíci

    Facts, stopped trying to make friends. I found they only came around during my ups and ignored me during my lows. :/ Had someone recently block me because I wasn't messaging her 24/7 because I literally just had started a donothon and apparently her bf at the time liking my twitter posts sent her off? Better just to focus on yourself.

  • @floweyla-gx
    @floweyla-gx Před 2 měsíci

    11:28, yeah, some people just like to take it personally

  • @xiaomin-d7v
    @xiaomin-d7v Před 3 měsíci

    MARI CAN I ASK FOR YOUR OPINION ON THIS? SHOULD I DO MULTIPLE THINGS I MAKE MUSIC AND GAMING I TRY TO DO NOVELS should i do just 1

  • @Leanoooooo
    @Leanoooooo Před 3 měsíci

    I struggle to make friends or reach out. And I have a dream to be a animator/music artist and I am inspired to be a vtuber in the future. I want to make friends along the way but idk how to make friends anymore.

  • @TheKeanu
    @TheKeanu Před 3 měsíci

    Imo if one really wanna become friends with someone, don´t just ask for collabs and such. That just makes one seem like a chaser. If one wanna be friends, talk with people casually, ask them if they wanna play games outside of streaming and recording. Reassure people that one will listen to them whatever the topic is about. If I wanted to be acquainted (not using the word friends because that is a something that builds itself), I would ask randomquestions like ,,Mari, what is your favourite ice cream? What movie genres do you like? What is the stupidest name you came up with when registering for a game or a forum in your past?" Those kinda questions not only show that I´m interested in getting to know Mari (sorry I´m using you for my example XD) but those can also be icebreakers and lead to fun topics to talk about^^.
    About the advice giving and taking it as critizing: I go with ,,It´s better to tell a hard, maybe hurtful, truth then a sugercoated lie. The first will hurt first but is better in the long run. The later will be nice now but only hurt further down the line."
    I´m shocked. How can´t you have all the answers? Jokes aside: If you would have, I bet you would have no problems and no struggles with anything.^^

  • @xiaomin-d7v
    @xiaomin-d7v Před 3 měsíci

    you are my friend and we both are vtubers and I am a big fan of you. you helped me from my start of my channel you are my idle

  • @QuippersUnited
    @QuippersUnited Před 3 měsíci

    I understand the not-wanting-to-be-used feeling very well, but I think there are multiple kinds of being used, I think there are certain people who view you as a slab of meat, and there are people who mean well, but funnel the world through their needs in the moment. These people can genuinely like you as a human being, but they lack either the awareness or the resources to give you the full friend treatment.
    I'll also say this: People are starting to scare me with the drama aspect of VTubing, I avoid drama like the plague, but based on what you and others say it sounds unavoidable.

  • @Mitsuki-meow海月
    @Mitsuki-meow海月 Před 2 měsíci +1

    Hi! I have a question, how can I be a successful vTuber out live stream? because my house won’t allow me to live stream because it is too noisy. And I don’t know what to post for videos.