I finally, FINALLY cut my emotional ties. I am no longer angry, bitter, sad, anything. I don't feel anything toward them. I don't feel pity. I don't care about them anymore. And let me tell you this is the best feeling in the world. I feel FREE. The narc I live with now is being all "nice" and it has zero effect on me. They're just a roommate now until my lease is up.
@@lizacampbell2183 Something I recommend everyone read is Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. Even if your parents aren't terrible, it's still great for dealing with narcissists. Narcissists are on the very extreme end of emotional immaturity. This book recognizes that, calls them out and breaks down how to handle them without hurting yourself in the process. I'm already NC with my narc relatives but I recently discovered my brother has narc tendencies. At one point he was terrorizing me and I was looking for DV shelters to go to. Once I read this book, I changed my mindset, adjusted how I dealt with him using what I learned, and now he's "nice" and "sweet." I am fully at peace with myself, and I can now live my life without being afraid of him or any other narc.
Yes indeed when you no longer care about them it is so freeing. In their minds they think we will always miss them because they cannot accept that we have moved on,no longer care,and know exactly who they are and everything that they hid
@@joshuaanzalone2060 Yeah that's the kicker: their minds are so small, so closed off, they actually can't fathom their victims being absolutely done with them. That's why when you leave or try to leave, they panic. They double down. They beg. They get crueler. In their head they are never the problem so why could you possibly want to leave them? They're perfect.
Mine actually tried to set me up many times after the smear campaign by planting beer cans in my vehicle pulling the shock bolts out of my truck to try and harm me and ultimately hire to hit man to try and come and kill me all of which I saw coming and avoided thank goodness! Went to the police but she was actually dating one of the police so nothing happened on that route so I moved 1,500 miles away and now it's been 2 years and I'm happier than ever!
Yeah I had a narc working near me who made a pathetic attempt to hire a hit man to kill me too, he convinced the hitman I was the one messing with him, and Id make a lot of trouble around this "hood mall" in his business selling stolen phones and drugs, the hit man hit me hard with a chest bump and said come here... So I did there's a train track, and he said he's done it before and can do it again push someone in front of the train where there's no CCTV camera. Instead of freaking out I reasoned with him - I said I just sell jewelry and watches and mind my own business - the guy your saying I'm messing with is messing with me ask anyone they see him all the time harrasing me and others, besides what is that loser going to pay you with to kill me, and get you into prison? And this big really bad criminal was smarter than the guy I work by and said maybe we need to go talk to him cuz I don't want any problems around here doing my business ( the phones and drugs) I was like sure! Like I said I'm only here to make a living selling my jewelry like you do what you do and I don't mess with anyone. SO the guy after telling me all this he's gonna kill me where and how saw I kept my cool and kinda liked me so we went back to where the guy who tried to hire to kill me was his arm around my shoulder like he just made a new friend walking together with a few of his people behind him. OH man if you could have seen the look on the guys face when he saw us coming up to him like we were buddies, he was freaking out! So the hit man said we had talked and he was sure I'm no problem for anyone now shake hands! When the guy who tried to have me killed reached his hand out he was shaking like a leaf on a tree and just kinda grabbed my forearm a little, So the hit man said that's not a REAL SHAKE! Now shake hands nice and he did still trembing, afterwards I walked of with one of the criminals friend who was rattling of names of phones he wanted to sell , I was like I have a good one now but ill let you know.... So this guy I work by probably thought I was conspiring with them against him ohhh it was so funny! Thats how low a narc will go is they wont kill you themselves but they sure will try and get someone else to
My ex Covert paraded her ex’s in front of me… Knowing she wanted a reaction, I did not react. Instead, I bought them both a cocktail… & walked away. Broke it off w/ her the next day. After, I called her the “C” word… She was able to get a protection order from a judge for this… Justice simply is not on the masculine-man’s side anywhere…
Become the mirror that reflects back to the narcissist the truth of themselves and then move on. This is possible being that we were their victims, having experienced the false self of the narcissist enables us with the truth of themselves and with this knowledge comes the ability to unmark the narcissist. This is dangerously serious so please be careful if you choose to expose the narcissist. Thank You!🌻 Many Wonderful And Endless Blessings!!
Sid expose person. Hexis an evil person with hatred for many.he has gone c thru many friends all of which he says he did everything forxthem and I did nothing when we worked rogether
The narcissist I know seems to have a real vampiric need for people's tears. If he spots that someone is upset he immediately makes a beeline for them, making out that he's comfortng them but really getting a sadistic thrill, an energy infusion, from their pain. It's pretty sick really. He knew I was grieving a free months back, and now I've noticed he's tried a couple of times to open up that wound in me. Such a manipulative predator. Now I see it, I really notice it.
@ Ellie... the reason why narcissists feed off other people's pain is because they themselves are empty inside they are completely empty and they feel so low about themselves deep inside that they need to see other people going through negativity so that they could puff themselves up. these sorts are true devils they are the closest thing to the devil on Earth.
In most cases, narcs will lash out when they sense losing control over someone. Also, they lose narc supply and need it to survive. Without supply, they will cave into despair and be into negative thoughts, which can put them at risk for suicide
Stalking me, calling repeatedly, following me, begging me to return back into that toxic relationship etc. He was unsuccessful; I had my power back, and I felt sooooooo damn good. I got a chance to live my life as I see fit. Yes, eventually that narc ended up on drugs. Thank goodness for sharing your videos they're educational and informative.🙏🏾
My narc is popular on the gram & we’re still in the same community but I blocked her 2 years ago & haven’t had contact since. We had been very close, but once I woke up to what was happening, there was no going back. She’s smeared me, contacted my friends, and has done all she can to bait me and get a reaction. I blocked most of her flying monkeys but I know she stalks my page. I still have a trauma bond, but I won’t engage ever again. I’m in trauma therapy and have ptsd from the experience. I’m worth so much more than I ever thought. And I’m worthy of mutual respect, empathy, and unconditional love.
Begging! She even said she needed therapy and was willing to go. I wouldn’t speak to her for about 2 weeks. We both agreed I needed to get away from her. She never did get therapy - she didn’t need it. Boy did I laugh! Thank you Clarice! 💖
One of the things that hurt deep for my narcissistic ex husband was when he tried to come crawling back to me a third time, lamenting "what he lost", was my response with, "you didn't LOSE anything. You threw it away, for the last time, and you're right, I have absolute zero reason to ever trust you again."
Their reactions were degrades, beggs, back to love bombs, threats, smear campaigns, black mails. After all those tactics didn't work they try to make sure your life is a living hell. For survivors...to stay strong and maintain sanity and very strong boundaries is a must.
He moved on and within 3 months married the back burner supply. After 4 months of marriage he started hovering me. He told me he was not happy with the new supply 🤔
When the narc realized they lost me as supply, (or control over me,) the narc went around my Apt, seeking anyone who would listen to them, and found someone to smear, or try to ruin my reputation with.
When the narc loses control they behave like a spoiled child having a tantrum. They have a desperate need to hurt someone. And the person they hurt, isn't always the offender, (in their sick mind) but someone around them. Evil.
A narcissist tried to smear his ex in a conversation with me. I didn’t confront him directly, but took every opportunity to speak well of her. His new girlfriend was puzzled. She’d only heard bad things.
As I'm typing this, I'm looking at the giant pressure cooker with bow atop that my fiancées mother sent, last ditch effort to get invited to the wedding next month I suppose
My Narc tried to skip out, by moving out without me knowing, leaving me with a ton of bills, him thinking he had me financially dependent upon him. I was working, he just didn't know it. So, I found out and packed him up and tossed all his stuff out (I own this house) then he calls the PD on me and they tell me he can stay, I said NO he wants to leave I'm helping him. THEY WERE GOING TO ARREST ME! OH NO❗ I tried to explain to them, last time he did this, he emptied my house while i was at work I didn't have a dish or a towel, he took all my clothes to the dump and broke everything he couldn't remove. Of course they didn't believe me, they said he can break anything that is his, they didn't seem to understand that house windows, my stove and refrigerator etc are not his, but he was out at the street wailing like a 3 year old who was told he couldn't have ice cream for dinner! He won again, with help from the law😠 Sure enough, he emptied my house out AGAIN!
My attorney told me he was FURIOUS, probably had a major temper tantrum. I had so much evidence of abuse and financial documents. He never saw it coming, it was awesome. It was a fast, easy, very fair divorce and I never had to hear or see the negative entity again. No Contact with Leverage!
When I finally woke up to what was going on through narcissist videos. I decided to cut ties with her. She was using me for my massage skills. She would reach out to me and would say are you mad at me. I would say no because she would of deflect it back to me. She told me I was irritating her. It been 8 months the last time I saw her. Something she said that stuck to me. She don’t like relationship because she doesn’t want to be control. I always felt that I was in a web. My spirit was always uneasy when I was with her.
I think my ex narc did all 3. She lost control of my emotions therefore she couldn't get the reactions and supply she wanted, she started working on new supply, cut me off physically tried to get everyone to think I'm the crazy one and abandon me (we divorced), she has been at rock bottom the past few years in & out of rehab/detox - she just got out the other day - 5X and counting, trying to make me feel bad she always tells me she's going in again.. I'm still kind, and pray for her, but I'll never let her or anyone else do that to rotton stuff to me ever again, life is just too short!
Mine has new supply but still thinks he can tell me and my kids what we're doing. When he doesn't get his way, he will argue and blow up our phones for hours. Our kids are teenagers, if they choose not to see him, that's their choice. For too many years, I made them visit when they did not want to and they're done. He will cuss at me and blame me for everything. He never apologizes, and never self reflects that they don't want to see him bc of things he has done. It's always someone else's fault.
My ex covert female narc...used to love bomb and triangulate me with some of her co workers...man...i was deeply emotionally attached to her...and still so. Im trying to unravel her web of deception from me...its 5 months since i was cruelly discarded after a 10year relationship and 2 kids later
Hey Clarice!! You always say thanks for listening at the end of your videos and to that I say no, thank you for making these videos. You are helping people to keep their sanity out here while dealing with these devils hiding in flesh suits. Many blessings to you and yours! 🙏🏽❤️
I think it depends on the narc. I've been no contact for the second time after breaking it initially. Haven't heard a word, seen him, have no idea if he's smearing me and at this point I don't care and there's nothing I can do if he's smearing me. He's probably busy with new supplies and due to his huge ego would never try to come back again at this point. They're all different with that but their games are the same. I have won this game: no contact/silence!
I think you're right some of these egos are too huge to hoover us, my ex definitely wouldn't, also super good looking people can always find someone new so don't need to go back, just my opinion.
@@JohnSmith-wo7ns I completely agree. My ex is extremely good looking and charming. I'm sure he is having no trouble finding new supply. He is extremely self-absorbed so after a while they do become ugly to the people who fall for them. I guess we should be glad both of our ex narcs have a big ego and didn't come back around to completely torture and destroy more. Easier to stay on the healing process and rid ourselves of these disgusting people.
@@daniellemorse6929 thanks Danielle, you're right of course. My ex was extremely attractive, ashamedly thats one of the reason s why I clung on so long. My low self esteem still plays games with my mind regarding her looks, ie thats the best I'll get, even though she was ugly inside. I'm not sure why I keep letting this torture me cos I didn't deserve how she treated me. I appreciate your response.
@@JohnSmith-wo7ns It sounds like we're both having the same problem. We stayed too long because of being so attracted to them because of our low self-esteem and being grateful to have them. I totally get what you're going through. I'm still missing looking at him, touching him, etc. We have to remember as good looking as they are to the outside, they are extremely ugly on the inside and that will show to the new supply eventually. They use their looks to capture victims so quickly. We have to move on and heal ourselves knowing that we gave as much as we could to these beautiful/attractive yet ugly people before realizing we had to let go to not be 100% destroyed. Thanks for your comments as well.
@@daniellemorse6929 youve no idea how grateful I am to you for this reply Danielle, you're the first person who's admitted to feeling similar to me regarding their looks.. most people just instantly reply, there's more to a person than looks!! You get how I feel so thank you. We both know they are not people we could stay with, but the attractiveness definitely is an issue to deal with afterwards, even if its down to our self esteem. And yes I agree, my ex's ugly side will have already revealed itself. Thank you so much.
My nex monkey branched to a new supply and then when she wouldn't take his shit he tried to get me to take him back. Um, no. I was like, chuck you farley.
It should be against the law cause those ppl are after an easy prey , that can be elderly ppl, crippled , autistic and they will want to be a legal guardian , yes that is evil as evil can be.
Yes...There should be a law put in place against narcissists. As these degenerates are quite evil. And yes...tgey do Predator on the Elderly...children...autistic people...mentally weak people...the disabled...the vulnerable...and any empathic person...also they target happy people also successful people...then the narcissist proceeds to drain the energy and resources of the target and also proceeds to be emotionally...verbally...psychologically...and physically ABUSIVE!!! I know...Because I seen it and experienced it. It is a really cunning and sneaky form of disorder -NPD. Make no mistake Narcissists are the Devil personified. Really ABUSIVE AND EVIL AND DECEPTIVE. THERE MUST BE A LAW SET IN PLACE WERE NARCISSISTS ARE HELD RESPONSIBLE AND ACCOUNTABLE FOR THEIR MANIPULATIONS AND ABUSE.
My biological father is 1000% malignant/vindictive narcissist, bipolar, master manipulator and huge liar. Thank you for the content! ou are the BEST and well said!
After over a year and a half of the crazy making behavior, I discarded the narcissist. My biggest mistake was warning her, it can't continue. Few months go by, then I start to get random # texts. Then FB messages. Then, new supply text my actual phone number. Mostly idle threats, which I called the bluff numerous times. No one showed up, except to take selfies with my car for social media. New supply never knocked on my door. New supply ended up in jail. Then a hoover. I was around for a week, then the revenge tour started, and an abrupt discard by her. Over basically nothing. Then my brother passed, another hoover, and another discard. Attacked at my weakest point. I finally told her, I don't care, I just want my money back. She knew I cared about her, just not the antics. I actually helped her with her revenge by using my compassion against me for her benefit(s). Talk about sick.
When I broke things off with a narc who fathers my daughter. He moved on quickly (with someone who he was likely grooming when we were together), and he also completely cut me off from my request to remain friends (which deeply hurt me at the time, but I am now SO grateful he did), and refused to give me closure. He also denied moving on, in an attempt to confuse, and triangulate. I realize now that he is simply an awful person who will never change. I think he’s convinced himself that controlling me will make him happy, and he resents that I will not allow it. I’m so grateful for all that I now know about narcissism.
My narc has gone into silent & hiding mode for the last four months. She is just 500 mts away from my house but purposely silent and hiding🤣🤣🤣 because I didn't react to her same guilt trip twice 🤣🤣🌹🙏
For me I went no contact with my ex-best friend. I do follow her on social media but I my interactions with her at a bare minimum. She has commented that she “misses me”but I didn’t respond. Because of her the word “best friend” gives me PTSD. One guy I was talking to turned out to be a married covert narcissist. Went no contact with him. He called me at work from a fake number. I was very cold to him on the phone “grey rock”. He said he misses me and he is sorry but it was too late. After he apologized and started to tell me to meet him somewhere but I hung up on him. He tried one more time to contact me on Instagram but I blocked him.
@ Marsha Ferron...listen...it takes two to tango. From what I read on your comment...you might be also causing these relationships. I believe you also might be a Narcissist. Why do I say that? Because narcissists love to hang up phones on people. And I can understand your PTSD from the use of the phrase "best friend". It happened to me with a friend...where I was panicky from hearing the word "friend". But You May have strong Narcissistic traits yourself. So think hard...meditate deeply...and seek counseling...because you just might be part of the problem. Thanks for reading.
@@damianlopez7630 You only got a potion of the story and that is not sufficient to put me in that category. If that is the case then everyone who puts a comment has narcissist traits. This person gave me really bad anxiety and I told him and he didn’t care. He always wanted to talk all day any never gave me space for myself. It was always about him and I couldn’t take it anymore.
To me, this has been a 2 and a half years of suffering, she’s all over me, but always says just as friends, she lie, betrays, use, and manipulate me, right now her life depends completely from me economically, I am so tire, her cognitive dissonance is so hard, that still confuses me sometimes, but I think is enough
They became violent, blamed and accused me of things that were the things they were doing to me. Her kid became violent too and my dogs got seriously hurt, a lot of property damage but me and my animals are still alive and the house didn't burn down so it could have been worse. One of her kids put a hole in the wall in the bathroom I have been remodeling that had a good view of our bed and covered it with a hateful note about our relationship. My ex justified it, defended it and then accused me of doing the same to her kid... That doesn't make any sense to me but it seems like toxic non-accountability. She is a victim of narcissistic abuse and her narc ex is in jail, which I kinda question now because of the strange stuff I was accused of. I don't think she could handle what her kid did and she just lost it rather than deal with her and get help for her kid who has needed it for a long time and she knew it, knows it but won't address the situation. The kid has had a lot of trauma but shouldn't that be more of a reason to hold them accountable? I stayed in my workshop a few days and they finally left. There was one last grab for more control but her not even being able to get her kid to go to school made me realize her kid was more in control and very angry at having some rules. They didn't follow them but we're really offended by even being asked to do basic stuff. I feel much better since they have been out. Her kids strange lurking behaviors made me feel uncomfortable and after seeing the peep hole i feel violated and... It makes my tummy feel like hurling. I don't even know how to address that. I thought of filing a police or CPS report cuz both her kids need serious help; one controls her life and the other she seemed to ignore. I don't know, 5 days ago and I am still at just hugging and crying into my horse. No chance of me contacting her. I wasn't in the house when they left but the mess that included three separate species of poop , I feel it told me who they were. I really love my horse today and am going to concentrate on that.
N lost control and all discarding started when N did understand I would not obey anymore. N did not touch my skin, walked around me in circles to avoid body contact. Awful behaviour. I did defense myself and refused to accept this behaviour anymore. I did not know what a narcissist was until after I commanded N to move out.
My sister in law’s smear campaign backfired on her big time! But she just ramped up her lies and now she’s has no family left. Which she never cared about in the first place.
It can be quite scary. Mine literally switched into full on rage mode, physically shaking and screaming the house down. She thought this was appropriate behaviour for a 25 year old 😂
My ex narc moved on to other supply, hoovered for 3 weeks, hit rock bottom… basically went through everything you described because he is indeed a textbook narc!!
He became obsessed and asked me about my current relationship. He hit me up every single day telling asking me what I was doing and telling me that he missed me and really wanted to see me, mirroring back to me everything I said to him. He even went as far as encouraging me to cheat on my spouse and trying to manipulate me into keeping the “cheating” on the DL. He threatened to hurt my spouse because he is mad. I know he’s upset because I walked away. He no longer have control over me and it pisses him off. TBH, I am getting a kick out of it because he did me so dirty when I was nothing but nice to him. Now that I have an understanding of narcissism, I am able to carry on with my life without feeling bad about it. I really appreciate the information you and others have done to help victims of narcissistic abuse recover from the trauma. Thank you!
I really like it when you break this down about control. It is such a hard thing to understand and get away from it if you had it from the day you were born and the narcissist is "your responsibility". My narc neighbor has been stalking me because he can not control me in his home-owner association role. It has been about 4 months now. I really understand the definition of a LEECH now. I see what I am now refusing and giving to my self instead.🎁
Continuation from my first post. When I went to the state police in my home state at the time. They State Policeman even told me that he knew the local authorities in the town I lived in. She had actually down loaded an app on my phone so they could track me. When I realized this as I was watching the hit man from behind a wall, saw the gun strapped on his side as he rode his harley in front of the location that I was at and stopped looking all over for me , But I didn't not have my vehicle with me as I knew what she was doing. At this time I took a knife and stuck it through my phone so they could not track me any longer. I knew if I stayed in that state she had so many people looking to harm me from her lies and smear campaign that I would ultimately end up in jail under false pretenses or Dead. So went full on NO CONTACT. She did hoover me out I picked that up pretty quick also. Then emails and asking our son to get ahold of me for her. But he did the right thing and told her that I was not going to ever do that. I changed my phone # 4 times in six months so she could not find me. This is all after 30 years of marriage. I had discovered who and what she was and actually doing. She knew it would ruin her with the information I have on her now. I have found hidden bank accounts, hidden properties and more..she has not been truthfully about any of the in discovery in the divorce, I am nervous as we have a court date this month it will be the first time seeing her in over 2 years. I just want her out of my life for good. I have been healing for sometime and am living life for myself now and no one else it is a feeling that I have not had in many many years its great.
To have others abandon and think differently toward you is what they themselves did so it reinforces and ratifies their position. We are nothing more than a defenseless third party. They are double crossers.
My narc told me that he’s been having violent thoughts towards me for weeks , and worries he may hurt me cos of his “demons” , so says he’s worried about spending long periods of time with me …but “loves me “ …. I’ve started to argue back as had enough how he treats me …
When he lost control he sent me a blackmail email he called an "offer". I was to give him $5k for him to pretend to love me and cheat behind my back. Status quo. I politely declined ..and blocked him on social media. I have not heard from him since. We were in a 10 year shit show relationship. It has been a couple months of NC.
My ex narc I was with for 19 long years has hit rock bottom he couldn’t control me anymore, I left him and he lost everything now he’s walking around with no where to live and trying to get his flying monkeys to find me so I can feel sorry for him and take him back so they don’t have to be bothered….. I’m the happiest I have ever been in 19 years yall and now I know he never wanted me to be free from his sick ways thanks 🙏
I love your videos clarice! Your knowledge of the narcissist is always so clearly explained. I think the narc went to other supply. I basically went ghost on him. So he has no way of contacting me. I just went silent 😉😂😂😂
How does the dynamic work when these control freaks move into someone else's property? When I moved in with my ex I wasn't allowed to touch anything without her permission, how can she behave like this if she moves in with somebody new.
He ghosted me and then 2 months later I contacted him just to get closure about the relationship. He acted like a victim and wanted me to chase him. :) I refused that, deleted him from all social media, and stop calling and texting him. He saw it and blocked me everywhere. :D And he started a smear campaign
My “friends” became ridiculously critical of all me and my family did. Very hypocritical judging ( I don’t mind constructive criticism, but hypocritical is another thing entirely) . When we decided to finally have nothing more to do with them, they demanded all tie with our daughter and their son be severed. My daughter complied by giving back all gifts and the response was chasing us into the parking lot and screaming that we were wrong for not fixing the problem. Shaking her finger in my face and falsely accusing us. I lost my temper and called her husband a bully and ended up apologizing for saying that later, (for saying that when he wasn’t there, not that he isn’t a bully). Then later she denied screaming and putting her finger in my face, but there were 4 witnesses and that pretty well ended their pursuit of us. Three yrs of this was enough. Total separation is the only answer. They will just drag you back and repeat.
Oh Clarice You Are Awesome!!! Thank You for All You Do. It Would be Awesome if You did a Meeting With The Legendary Richard Grannon!!! The Ratings are going to Explode!!! 😃😃😃👏👏👏🙏🙏🙏 You Both Would Deliver Such A Potent Message All The Fans Will Totally Relish!!! 😃😃😃🙏🙏🙏💪💪💪
He was arrested off a flight, for his abuse - apparently he is broken, his problem not mine he would have been happy to see me dead in the gutter, which I am not happily 😊
In my situation, HE has definitely attempted to "smear" me with my kids in order for them to accept him and realize that it was my action of "being cold" that caused the problem here. I am a cold person he told me; I heard my daughter regurgitate that same saying back to me, saying..."Mom, it's true. You can be cold." This seems to be a minor situation, but it is a situation nonetheless, and it is his inability to take accountability of his own actions. He has also tried to win me back with being nice, attempts at seeming vulnerable, etc. He is very good at either acting, or he has true feelings towards our children (which I'm sure he does), but he uses that as ammunition to needle his way back into my life. Then, I second guess myself and here we go again!!
Tell your daughter that you can love a person better but be healthier when living APART! She might dream about her parents “being together” ,but needs to learn that sometimes its best to be a strong capable HAPPY person with no drama. You do not need to tell her the “ no drama” rule but you MUST give a great role model to follow. She will see you with wiser eyes when she is no longer a child &living on her own. You do NOT want her to identify with victim role & she needs your example of how to be strong & authentic. Next time, he or your daughter uses the “cold” word, just say “I’m not cold, I’m STRONG &I’m learning how to put myself first, and SMILE! Take back your power!!
In my case, he just moved on like our marriage ment nothing! I know now that actually it did mean nothing to him. We were married for 20yrs and he had a secret family 👪 possible 2 secrets
My estranged husband (I’m filing for divorce) is now trying to reconcile the relationship - being extra friendly/guess trying to win me back but too little too late with what I have been through which included violence. Staying amicable while the divorce goes through and after but he will never get me back as his partner! He is currently playing the victim in all of this - poor me/where am I going to live when the house is sold/I’ll be homeless/I don’t know what to do/wish I had the courage to commit suicide etc but apart from the suicide I am on the same situation! But people are falling for it - taking over my role that is “the mother figure” and doing things for him like looking out for houses on the internet which he is quite capable of doing only for him to reply “how am I going to be able to travel 200 miles to view these properties” - attention seeking! He is quite capable of doing this - it’s infuriating for his friends. He will never help himself and it is very difficult to understand this way of thinking for our friends - after knowing him for 50 years I don’t even try to understand - it just is!
She realized that she lost control when I took control of my own finances, closed our joint account and stopped filing joint taxes (she has a business and never paid her taxes resulting in IRS liens on the house). Once I did those things, she immediately began plotting my destruction - emotionally, spiritually and financially. She had already coopted my friends and relatives, so it was easy for her to pull the trigger on the smear campaign. She filed for divorce but has dragged the process out for going on 2 years (all the while accusing me of dragging it out) during which, she has done everything possible to keep my son away from me. Now that the divorce is within 5 months of termination, she seems to be doing all 4 things at once: finding alternate sources, trying to be nice to win me over, seeking revenge and hitting rock bottom. It would be comical if it weren't for the fact that I'm stuck in this mess. She flashes from being nice to horrible in the blink of an eye - quite erratic. I'm gaining quite a bit of insight from videos like this and find, by a miracle of God, that I'm not reacting the way I used to. I stay calm, don't give in to retaliation or even defense of myself. This is amazing progress because not long ago, I was questioning my own sanity. Thank you for your work.
My girlfriends ex is a full blown narcissist. We've been going no contact for two years. She has had two slips and broke no contact. Ive been accused of coercion, abuse, kidnapping and other vile things when first got together and each subsequent time she broke no contact. Each time i had denied him access to her he called the police with those accusations. The idiot. This last time when the cops showed up at my door I flat told them to get a warrent and to go away. Well after a few more weeks of drama that a**hole has been exposed, at least to the authorities. I hope they charge him with causing a false report.
Some are too good looking to ever be without supply, they don't care or hoover just move on. And saying looks fade doesn't matter, they'll just go with someone older.
8 weeks free. First it was phone calls to both phones in the middle of the night. Then social media slander. Then he posted new girl friend on social media . That didn't work out. Then more social media slander. Now he is filing false tax fraud claims to the IRS. I promise you he is not done with trying to destroy me.. 18 year relationship. ... I filled a restraining order. ... I served my time.
Posted photos of my personal life on fb to discredit me for her actions . She blocked me for 4 months so I found another partner. Then she blamed me . She gives me the silent treatments. This has been going on for 4 years. Iam always to blame. I have given her so much money to keep her from becoming emotional, but after a short time she finds fault in me out of no wear…? I have had enough of being stepped on. I love her very much but she has pushed the boundaries to many times.
I was his primary supply so when I walked away he first tried to love bomb me. Then when that didn’t work he smeared my name and became vindictive. Eventually he hit rock bottom when others realized he’s not the nice guy he’s been portraying. Currently he’s acting nice (probably love bombing a few family members) and seems to have bounced back from his depression. How long will this last? I know he can’t keep that mask on for too long.
My ex-narc, in the final discard, tried to get my attention. Parking in the driveway with his NS, smear campaign with my friends, tried doting my friends, an acrimonious divorce, tried to beat up one of our kids, ran a smear campaign on him as well., called my place of employment and companied about me. I look at this list of shitty things and I think - he's so messed up, not right in the head.
He became angry with me when I broke up and went No Contact. When I tried to reach him 5 months later he was angry and acted like he didn’t know who was texting. I was just trying to give him back an expensive item I found while I was moving. I don’t intend to ever contact him and he no longer knows where I live. He is a cruel vindictive person. Ghosting at length for very minor reasons. Silent treatments from his hot headed, impulsive anger. I had to go no contact to break the Stockholm Syndrome. My friends never saw me like this because they said I’m such a strong woman. If I wasn’t going through a divorce when I met this narc, he probably wouldn’t be a person I would consider dating. I still have CPTSD from years of his mental abuse and my Trauma Bond.
They absolutely go insane and into narcissistic rage
They become way more dangerous. They amplify their crazy behavior.
She ramped up the trauma, drama and chaos. NO MORE!
I finally, FINALLY cut my emotional ties. I am no longer angry, bitter, sad, anything. I don't feel anything toward them. I don't feel pity. I don't care about them anymore. And let me tell you this is the best feeling in the world. I feel FREE. The narc I live with now is being all "nice" and it has zero effect on me. They're just a roommate now until my lease is up.
🥰🥰 so happy to hear this, you have given me hope on a very hard day. Thanks for sharing
@@lizacampbell2183 Something I recommend everyone read is Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. Even if your parents aren't terrible, it's still great for dealing with narcissists. Narcissists are on the very extreme end of emotional immaturity. This book recognizes that, calls them out and breaks down how to handle them without hurting yourself in the process.
I'm already NC with my narc relatives but I recently discovered my brother has narc tendencies. At one point he was terrorizing me and I was looking for DV shelters to go to. Once I read this book, I changed my mindset, adjusted how I dealt with him using what I learned, and now he's "nice" and "sweet." I am fully at peace with myself, and I can now live my life without being afraid of him or any other narc.
What did you do to heal?
I wish you all the luck in the future!🙏
Yes indeed when you no longer care about them it is so freeing. In their minds they think we will always miss them because they cannot accept that we have moved on,no longer care,and know exactly who they are and everything that they hid
@@joshuaanzalone2060 Yeah that's the kicker: their minds are so small, so closed off, they actually can't fathom their victims being absolutely done with them. That's why when you leave or try to leave, they panic. They double down. They beg. They get crueler. In their head they are never the problem so why could you possibly want to leave them? They're perfect.
Mine actually tried to set me up many times after the smear campaign by planting beer cans in my vehicle pulling the shock bolts out of my truck to try and harm me and ultimately hire to hit man to try and come and kill me all of which I saw coming and avoided thank goodness! Went to the police but she was actually dating one of the police so nothing happened on that route so I moved 1,500 miles away and now it's been 2 years and I'm happier than ever!
Yeah I had a narc working near me who made a pathetic attempt to hire a hit man to kill me too, he convinced the hitman I was the one messing with him, and Id make a lot of trouble around this "hood mall" in his business selling stolen phones and drugs, the hit man hit me hard with a chest bump and said come here... So I did there's a train track, and he said he's done it before and can do it again push someone in front of the train where there's no CCTV camera. Instead of freaking out I reasoned with him - I said I just sell jewelry and watches and mind my own business - the guy your saying I'm messing with is messing with me ask anyone they see him all the time harrasing me and others, besides what is that loser going to pay you with to kill me, and get you into prison? And this big really bad criminal was smarter than the guy I work by and said maybe we need to go talk to him cuz I don't want any problems around here doing my business ( the phones and drugs) I was like sure! Like I said I'm only here to make a living selling my jewelry like you do what you do and I don't mess with anyone. SO the guy after telling me all this he's gonna kill me where and how saw I kept my cool and kinda liked me so we went back to where the guy who tried to hire to kill me was his arm around my shoulder like he just made a new friend walking together with a few of his people behind him. OH man if you could have seen the look on the guys face when he saw us coming up to him like we were buddies, he was freaking out! So the hit man said we had talked and he was sure I'm no problem for anyone now shake hands! When the guy who tried to have me killed reached his hand out he was shaking like a leaf on a tree and just kinda grabbed my forearm a little, So the hit man said that's not a REAL SHAKE! Now shake hands nice and he did still trembing, afterwards I walked of with one of the criminals friend who was rattling of names of phones he wanted to sell , I was like I have a good one now but ill let you know.... So this guy I work by probably thought I was conspiring with them against him ohhh it was so funny! Thats how low a narc will go is they wont kill you themselves but they sure will try and get someone else to
My ex Covert paraded her ex’s in front of me… Knowing she wanted a reaction, I did not react. Instead, I bought them both a cocktail… & walked away. Broke it off w/ her the next day. After, I called her the “C” word…
She was able to get a protection order from a judge for this… Justice simply is not on the masculine-man’s side anywhere…
C word is too nice a name, especially for my ex.
@@JohnSmith-wo7ns Cost me $700 to call her that for an attorney to get me off for a 30 day protection order… Well worth it!
@@darrylyusko8615 and its true!
I'm sorry
💯
Become the mirror that reflects back to the narcissist the truth of themselves and then move on. This is possible being that we were their victims, having experienced the false self of the narcissist enables us with the truth of themselves and with this knowledge comes the ability to unmark the narcissist. This is dangerously serious so please be careful if you choose to expose the narcissist. Thank You!🌻 Many Wonderful And Endless Blessings!!
Sid expose person. Hexis an evil person with hatred for many.he has gone c thru many friends all of which he says he did everything forxthem and I did nothing when we worked rogether
Narcissists view kindness as weakness... I have gone no contact for 20 years... The peace I feel is a blessing...❤
The narcissist I know seems to have a real vampiric need for people's tears.
If he spots that someone is upset he immediately makes a beeline for them, making out that he's comfortng them but really getting a sadistic thrill, an energy infusion, from their pain. It's pretty sick really.
He knew I was grieving a free months back, and now I've noticed he's tried a couple of times to open up that wound in me. Such a manipulative predator. Now I see it, I really notice it.
@ Ellie...Yes Narcissists enjoy and feed from other's pain.
@ Ellie... the reason why narcissists feed off other people's pain is because they themselves are empty inside they are completely empty and they feel so low about themselves deep inside that they need to see other people going through negativity so that they could puff themselves up. these sorts are true devils they are the closest thing to the devil on Earth.
True, narcs derive energy from the suffering of others. It's like an emotional high for them because it makes them feel better that they aren't alone.
They are miserable and regressing not progressing
In most cases, narcs will lash out when they sense losing control over someone. Also, they lose narc supply and need it to survive. Without supply, they will cave into despair and be into negative thoughts, which can put them at risk for suicide
That imp became obsessed with destroying me. He wanted me to suffer.
Same cue
Stalking me, calling repeatedly, following me, begging me to return back into that toxic relationship etc. He was unsuccessful; I had my power back, and I felt sooooooo damn good. I got a chance to live my life as I see fit. Yes, eventually that narc ended up on drugs. Thank goodness for sharing your videos they're educational and informative.🙏🏾
You are very welcome.🤗💖
My narc is popular on the gram & we’re still in the same community but I blocked her 2 years ago & haven’t had contact since. We had been very close, but once I woke up to what was happening, there was no going back. She’s smeared me, contacted my friends, and has done all she can to bait me and get a reaction. I blocked most of her flying monkeys but I know she stalks my page. I still have a trauma bond, but I won’t engage ever again. I’m in trauma therapy and have ptsd from the experience. I’m worth so much more than I ever thought. And I’m worthy of mutual respect, empathy, and unconditional love.
Begging! She even said she needed therapy and was willing to go. I wouldn’t speak to her for about 2 weeks. We both agreed I needed to get away from her. She never did get therapy - she didn’t need it. Boy did I laugh!
Thank you Clarice! 💖
I can imagine nracs begging and ill get therapy if your their primary source and they are afraid they cant find another person to control
One of the things that hurt deep for my narcissistic ex husband was when he tried to come crawling back to me a third time, lamenting "what he lost", was my response with, "you didn't LOSE anything. You threw it away, for the last time, and you're right, I have absolute zero reason to ever trust you again."
Their reactions were degrades, beggs, back to love bombs, threats, smear campaigns, black mails. After all those tactics didn't work they try to make sure your life is a living hell. For survivors...to stay strong and maintain sanity and very strong boundaries is a must.
He moved on and within 3 months married the back burner supply. After 4 months of marriage he started hovering me. He told me he was not happy with the new supply 🤔
When the narc realized they lost me as supply, (or control over me,) the narc went around my Apt, seeking anyone who would listen to them, and found someone to smear, or try to ruin my reputation with.
When the narc loses control they behave like a spoiled child having a tantrum. They have a desperate need to hurt someone. And the person they hurt, isn't always the offender, (in their sick mind) but someone around them. Evil.
A narcissist tried to smear his ex in a conversation with me. I didn’t confront him directly, but took every opportunity to speak well of her. His new girlfriend was puzzled. She’d only heard bad things.
As I'm typing this, I'm looking at the giant pressure cooker with bow atop that my fiancées mother sent, last ditch effort to get invited to the wedding next month I suppose
My Narc tried to skip out, by moving out without me knowing, leaving me with a ton of bills, him thinking he had me financially dependent upon him.
I was working, he just didn't know it. So, I found out and packed him up and tossed all his stuff out (I own this house) then he calls the PD on me and they tell me he can stay, I said NO he wants to leave I'm helping him.
THEY WERE GOING TO ARREST ME! OH NO❗
I tried to explain to them, last time he did this, he emptied my house while i was at work I didn't have a dish or a towel, he took all my clothes to the dump and broke everything he couldn't remove.
Of course they didn't believe me, they said he can break anything that is his, they didn't seem to understand that house windows, my stove and refrigerator etc are not his, but he was out at the street wailing like a 3 year old who was told he couldn't have ice cream for dinner!
He won again, with help from the law😠
Sure enough, he emptied my house out AGAIN!
My attorney told me he was FURIOUS, probably had a major temper tantrum. I had so much evidence of abuse and financial documents. He never saw it coming, it was awesome. It was a fast, easy, very fair divorce and I never had to hear or see the negative entity again. No Contact with Leverage!
When I finally woke up to what was going on through narcissist videos. I decided to cut ties with her. She was using me for my massage skills. She would reach out to me and would say are you mad at me. I would say no because she would of deflect it back to me. She told me I was irritating her. It been 8 months the last time I saw her. Something she said that stuck to me. She don’t like relationship because she doesn’t want to be control. I always felt that I was in a web. My spirit was always uneasy when I was with her.
I think my ex narc did all 3. She lost control of my emotions therefore she couldn't get the reactions and supply she wanted, she started working on new supply, cut me off physically tried to get everyone to think I'm the crazy one and abandon me (we divorced), she has been at rock bottom the past few years in & out of rehab/detox - she just got out the other day - 5X and counting, trying to make me feel bad she always tells me she's going in again.. I'm still kind, and pray for her, but I'll never let her or anyone else do that to rotton stuff to me ever again, life is just too short!
Mine has new supply but still thinks he can tell me and my kids what we're doing. When he doesn't get his way, he will argue and blow up our phones for hours. Our kids are teenagers, if they choose not to see him, that's their choice. For too many years, I made them visit when they did not want to and they're done. He will cuss at me and blame me for everything. He never apologizes, and never self reflects that they don't want to see him bc of things he has done. It's always someone else's fault.
My ex covert female narc...used to love bomb and triangulate me with some of her co workers...man...i was deeply emotionally attached to her...and still so. Im trying to unravel her web of deception from me...its 5 months since i was cruelly discarded after a 10year relationship and 2 kids later
Wishing you healing my friend Namaste😢
Hey Clarice!! You always say thanks for listening at the end of your videos and to that I say no, thank you for making these videos. You are helping people to keep their sanity out here while dealing with these devils hiding in flesh suits. Many blessings to you and yours! 🙏🏽❤️
She became obsessed with me after I started no contact. She’s still pestering me almost daily for the last 6 months from fake numbers
I think it depends on the narc. I've been no contact for the second time after breaking it initially. Haven't heard a word, seen him, have no idea if he's smearing me and at this point I don't care and there's nothing I can do if he's smearing me. He's probably busy with new supplies and due to his huge ego would never try to come back again at this point. They're all different with that but their games are the same. I have won this game: no contact/silence!
I think you're right some of these egos are too huge to hoover us, my ex definitely wouldn't, also super good looking people can always find someone new so don't need to go back, just my opinion.
@@JohnSmith-wo7ns I completely agree. My ex is extremely good looking and charming. I'm sure he is having no trouble finding new supply. He is extremely self-absorbed so after a while they do become ugly to the people who fall for them. I guess we should be glad both of our ex narcs have a big ego and didn't come back around to completely torture and destroy more. Easier to stay on the healing process and rid ourselves of these disgusting people.
@@daniellemorse6929 thanks Danielle, you're right of course. My ex was extremely attractive, ashamedly thats one of the reason s why I clung on so long. My low self esteem still plays games with my mind regarding her looks, ie thats the best I'll get, even though she was ugly inside. I'm not sure why I keep letting this torture me cos I didn't deserve how she treated me. I appreciate your response.
@@JohnSmith-wo7ns It sounds like we're both having the same problem. We stayed too long because of being so attracted to them because of our low self-esteem and being grateful to have them. I totally get what you're going through. I'm still missing looking at him, touching him, etc. We have to remember as good looking as they are to the outside, they are extremely ugly on the inside and that will show to the new supply eventually. They use their looks to capture victims so quickly. We have to move on and heal ourselves knowing that we gave as much as we could to these beautiful/attractive yet ugly people before realizing we had to let go to not be 100% destroyed. Thanks for your comments as well.
@@daniellemorse6929 youve no idea how grateful I am to you for this reply Danielle, you're the first person who's admitted to feeling similar to me regarding their looks.. most people just instantly reply, there's more to a person than looks!! You get how I feel so thank you. We both know they are not people we could stay with, but the attractiveness definitely is an issue to deal with afterwards, even if its down to our self esteem. And yes I agree, my ex's ugly side will have already revealed itself. Thank you so much.
Went through 3 of those been no contact almost 7 months so I don't know how she's doing I pray for her healing everyday...
I have the fainted idea. I block 🚫 her from everything. Not looking back.
When I refused his control any longer he has started raging. I mean red face veins bulging rage. He is so draining
My sister is miserable lol I saw her husband. That man gained 50 pounds since I cut her off smh
They Will Always Hit Rock Bottom
My nex monkey branched to a new supply and then when she wouldn't take his shit he tried to get me to take him back. Um, no. I was like, chuck you farley.
It should be against the law cause those ppl are after an easy prey , that can be elderly ppl, crippled , autistic and they will want to be a legal guardian , yes that is evil as evil can be.
Yes...There should be a law put in place against narcissists. As these degenerates are quite evil. And yes...tgey do Predator on the Elderly...children...autistic people...mentally weak people...the disabled...the vulnerable...and any empathic person...also they target happy people also successful people...then the narcissist proceeds to drain the energy and resources of the target and also proceeds to be emotionally...verbally...psychologically...and physically ABUSIVE!!! I know...Because I seen it and experienced it. It is a really cunning and sneaky form of disorder -NPD. Make no mistake Narcissists are the Devil personified. Really ABUSIVE AND EVIL AND DECEPTIVE. THERE MUST BE A LAW SET IN PLACE WERE NARCISSISTS ARE HELD RESPONSIBLE AND ACCOUNTABLE FOR THEIR MANIPULATIONS AND ABUSE.
They predate on the Elderly and also children.
My biological father is 1000% malignant/vindictive narcissist, bipolar, master manipulator and huge liar. Thank you for the content! ou are the BEST and well said!
After over a year and a half of the crazy making behavior, I discarded the narcissist. My biggest mistake was warning her, it can't continue. Few months go by, then I start to get random # texts. Then FB messages. Then, new supply text my actual phone number. Mostly idle threats, which I called the bluff numerous times. No one showed up, except to take selfies with my car for social media. New supply never knocked on my door. New supply ended up in jail. Then a hoover. I was around for a week, then the revenge tour started, and an abrupt discard by her. Over basically nothing. Then my brother passed, another hoover, and another discard. Attacked at my weakest point. I finally told her, I don't care, I just want my money back. She knew I cared about her, just not the antics. I actually helped her with her revenge by using my compassion against me for her benefit(s). Talk about sick.
When I broke things off with a narc who fathers my daughter. He moved on quickly (with someone who he was likely grooming when we were together), and he also completely cut me off from my request to remain friends (which deeply hurt me at the time, but I am now SO grateful he did), and refused to give me closure. He also denied moving on, in an attempt to confuse, and triangulate. I realize now that he is simply an awful person who will never change. I think he’s convinced himself that controlling me will make him happy, and he resents that I will not allow it. I’m so grateful for all that I now know about narcissism.
Knowledge is power.🙏
My narc has gone into silent & hiding mode for the last four months. She is just 500 mts away from my house but purposely silent and hiding🤣🤣🤣 because I didn't react to her same guilt trip twice 🤣🤣🌹🙏
When we divorced....he realised that he has lost me forever...
So he is playing with emotions of my children..... and manipulating them against me
Really interesting, thanks Clarice
For me I went no contact with my ex-best friend. I do follow her on social media but I my interactions with her at a bare minimum. She has commented that she “misses me”but I didn’t respond. Because of her the word “best friend” gives me PTSD. One guy I was talking to turned out to be a married covert narcissist. Went no contact with him. He called me at work from a fake number. I was very cold to him on the phone “grey rock”. He said he misses me and he is sorry but it was too late. After he apologized and started to tell me to meet him somewhere but I hung up on him. He tried one more time to contact me on Instagram but I blocked him.
@ Marsha Ferron...listen...it takes two to tango. From what I read on your comment...you might be also causing these relationships. I believe you also might be a Narcissist. Why do I say that? Because narcissists love to hang up phones on people. And I can understand your PTSD from the use of the phrase "best friend". It happened to me with a friend...where I was panicky from hearing the word "friend". But You May have strong Narcissistic traits yourself. So think hard...meditate deeply...and seek counseling...because you just might be part of the problem. Thanks for reading.
@@damianlopez7630 You only got a potion of the story and that is not sufficient to put me in that category. If that is the case then everyone who puts a comment has narcissist traits. This person gave me really bad anxiety and I told him and he didn’t care. He always wanted to talk all day any never gave me space for myself. It was always about him and I couldn’t take it anymore.
@@damianlopez7630 standing up for myself, setting boundaries, and noticing the red flags is not narcissist.
To me, this has been a 2 and a half years of suffering, she’s all over me, but always says just as friends, she lie, betrays, use, and manipulate me, right now her life depends completely from me economically, I am so tire, her cognitive dissonance is so hard, that still confuses me sometimes, but I think is enough
They became violent, blamed and accused me of things that were the things they were doing to me. Her kid became violent too and my dogs got seriously hurt, a lot of property damage but me and my animals are still alive and the house didn't burn down so it could have been worse. One of her kids put a hole in the wall in the bathroom I have been remodeling that had a good view of our bed and covered it with a hateful note about our relationship. My ex justified it, defended it and then accused me of doing the same to her kid... That doesn't make any sense to me but it seems like toxic non-accountability. She is a victim of narcissistic abuse and her narc ex is in jail, which I kinda question now because of the strange stuff I was accused of. I don't think she could handle what her kid did and she just lost it rather than deal with her and get help for her kid who has needed it for a long time and she knew it, knows it but won't address the situation. The kid has had a lot of trauma but shouldn't that be more of a reason to hold them accountable? I stayed in my workshop a few days and they finally left. There was one last grab for more control but her not even being able to get her kid to go to school made me realize her kid was more in control and very angry at having some rules. They didn't follow them but we're really offended by even being asked to do basic stuff. I feel much better since they have been out. Her kids strange lurking behaviors made me feel uncomfortable and after seeing the peep hole i feel violated and... It makes my tummy feel like hurling. I don't even know how to address that. I thought of filing a police or CPS report cuz both her kids need serious help; one controls her life and the other she seemed to ignore. I don't know, 5 days ago and I am still at just hugging and crying into my horse. No chance of me contacting her. I wasn't in the house when they left but the mess that included three separate species of poop , I feel it told me who they were. I really love my horse today and am going to concentrate on that.
Quickly moved on to another supply......
He is become kind and silent. But all what he does are fake
Yep ..... Their Image is everything
I really don't know. I blocked 🚫 her when I first found out she had multiple guys. Never looked back.
Yes They Do All The Time,
He quickly moved on to the 3rd party we both new from church and also was married at the time.😡
N lost control and all discarding started when N did understand I would not obey anymore. N did not touch my skin, walked around me in circles to avoid body contact. Awful behaviour. I did defense myself and refused to accept this behaviour anymore. I did not know what a narcissist was until after I commanded N to move out.
My sister in law’s smear campaign backfired on her big time! But she just ramped up her lies and now she’s has no family left. Which she never cared about in the first place.
extremely demonic aggresive
OMG you're spot on!
Hi God bless you sweetheart great message we are upsetting the narcissist thank God for that be safe blessings 👍😊🌎❤️👏🏻✝️🇺🇸🙌
It can be quite scary. Mine literally switched into full on rage mode, physically shaking and screaming the house down. She thought this was appropriate behaviour for a 25 year old 😂
My ex narc moved on to other supply, hoovered for 3 weeks, hit rock bottom… basically went through everything you described because he is indeed a textbook narc!!
He became obsessed and asked me about my current relationship. He hit me up every single day telling asking me what I was doing and telling me that he missed me and really wanted to see me, mirroring back to me everything I said to him. He even went as far as encouraging me to cheat on my spouse and trying to manipulate me into keeping the “cheating” on the DL. He threatened to hurt my spouse because he is mad. I know he’s upset because I walked away. He no longer have control over me and it pisses him off. TBH, I am getting a kick out of it because he did me so dirty when I was nothing but nice to him. Now that I have an understanding of narcissism, I am able to carry on with my life without feeling bad about it. I really appreciate the information you and others have done to help victims of narcissistic abuse recover from the trauma. Thank you!
I really like it when you break this down about control. It is such a hard thing to understand and get away from it if you had it from the day you were born and the narcissist is "your responsibility". My narc neighbor has been stalking me because he can not control me in his home-owner association role. It has been about 4 months now. I really understand the definition of a LEECH now. I see what I am now refusing and giving to my self instead.🎁
Continuation from my first post. When I went to the state police in my home state at the time. They State Policeman even told me that he knew the local authorities in the town I lived in. She had actually down loaded an app on my phone so they could track me. When I realized this as I was watching the hit man from behind a wall, saw the gun strapped on his side as he rode his harley in front of the location that I was at and stopped looking all over for me , But I didn't not have my vehicle with me as I knew what she was doing. At this time I took a knife and stuck it through my phone so they could not track me any longer. I knew if I stayed in that state she had so many people looking to harm me from her lies and smear campaign that I would ultimately end up in jail under false pretenses or Dead. So went full on NO CONTACT. She did hoover me out I picked that up pretty quick also. Then emails and asking our son to get ahold of me for her. But he did the right thing and told her that I was not going to ever do that. I changed my phone # 4 times in six months so she could not find me. This is all after 30 years of marriage. I had discovered who and what she was and actually doing. She knew it would ruin her with the information I have on her now. I have found hidden bank accounts, hidden properties and more..she has not been truthfully about any of the in discovery in the divorce, I am nervous as we have a court date this month it will be the first time seeing her in over 2 years. I just want her out of my life for good. I have been healing for sometime and am living life for myself now and no one else it is a feeling that I have not had in many many years its great.
To have others abandon and think differently toward you is what they themselves did so it reinforces and ratifies their position. We are nothing more than a defenseless third party. They are double crossers.
My God, you nailed it completely on #1
and 3, I've distanced myself from the group of people I hung out with.. and guess who is their loving new best friend? Yep.. her
My narc told me that he’s been having violent thoughts towards me for weeks , and worries he may hurt me cos of his “demons” , so says he’s worried about spending long periods of time with me …but “loves me “ …. I’ve started to argue back as had enough how he treats me …
The one I know used bullying tactics and aggression
I left the narc and he moved on its been going on 5 years and he doesn't bother me at all he knows not to come for me I will expose him to the fullest
When he lost control he sent me a blackmail email he called an "offer". I was to give him $5k for him to pretend to love me and cheat behind my back. Status quo.
I politely declined ..and blocked him on social media. I have not heard from him since. We were in a 10 year shit show relationship. It has been a couple months of NC.
My ex narc I was with for 19 long years has hit rock bottom he couldn’t control me anymore, I left him and he lost everything now he’s walking around with no where to live and trying to get his flying monkeys to find me so I can feel sorry for him and take him back so they don’t have to be bothered….. I’m the happiest I have ever been in 19 years yall and now I know he never wanted me to be free from his sick ways thanks 🙏
I love your videos clarice! Your knowledge of the narcissist is always so clearly explained. I think the narc went to other supply. I basically went ghost on him. So he has no way of contacting me. I just went silent 😉😂😂😂
How does the dynamic work when these control freaks move into someone else's property? When I moved in with my ex I wasn't allowed to touch anything without her permission, how can she behave like this if she moves in with somebody new.
He ghosted me and then 2 months later I contacted him just to get closure about the relationship. He acted like a victim and wanted me to chase him. :) I refused that, deleted him from all social media, and stop calling and texting him. He saw it and blocked me everywhere. :D And he started a smear campaign
My “friends” became ridiculously critical of all me and my family did. Very hypocritical judging ( I don’t mind constructive criticism, but hypocritical is another thing entirely) . When we decided to finally have nothing more to do with them, they demanded all tie with our daughter and their son be severed. My daughter complied by giving back all gifts and the response was chasing us into the parking lot and screaming that we were wrong for not fixing the problem. Shaking her finger in my face and falsely accusing us. I lost my temper and called her husband a bully and ended up apologizing for saying that later, (for saying that when he wasn’t there, not that he isn’t a bully). Then later she denied screaming and putting her finger in my face, but there were 4 witnesses and that pretty well ended their pursuit of us. Three yrs of this was enough. Total separation is the only answer. They will just drag you back and repeat.
So true I’m doing this now I’m his main supply he’s going nuts
Your video was a great help yes he dropped me for some one else thank you so much
A FANTASTIC VLOG MANY THANKS.
This is what I’m doing right now
Oh Clarice You Are Awesome!!! Thank You for All You Do. It Would be Awesome if You did a Meeting With The Legendary Richard Grannon!!! The Ratings are going to Explode!!! 😃😃😃👏👏👏🙏🙏🙏 You Both Would Deliver Such A Potent Message All The Fans Will Totally Relish!!! 😃😃😃🙏🙏🙏💪💪💪
He was arrested off a flight, for his abuse - apparently he is broken, his problem not mine he would have been happy to see me dead in the gutter, which I am not happily 😊
U r absolutely right
The cartoon heavy metal tells the truth on the police mafia
In my situation, HE has definitely attempted to "smear" me with my kids in order for them to accept him and realize that it was my action of "being cold" that caused the problem here. I am a cold person he told me; I heard my daughter regurgitate that same saying back to me, saying..."Mom, it's true. You can be cold." This seems to be a minor situation, but it is a situation nonetheless, and it is his inability to take accountability of his own actions. He has also tried to win me back with being nice, attempts at seeming vulnerable, etc. He is very good at either acting, or he has true feelings towards our children (which I'm sure he does), but he uses that as ammunition to needle his way back into my life. Then, I second guess myself and here we go again!!
Tell your daughter that you can love a person better but be healthier when living APART! She might dream about her parents “being together” ,but needs to learn that sometimes its best to be a strong capable HAPPY person with no drama. You do not need to tell her the “ no drama” rule but you MUST give a great role model to follow. She will see you with wiser eyes when she is no longer a child &living on her own. You do NOT want her to identify with victim role & she needs your example of how to be strong & authentic. Next time, he or your daughter uses the “cold” word, just say “I’m not cold, I’m STRONG &I’m learning how to put myself first, and SMILE! Take back your power!!
In my case, he just moved on like our marriage ment nothing!
I know now that actually it did mean nothing to him.
We were married for 20yrs and he had a secret family 👪 possible 2 secrets
Yepp ...... Their Ruthless
Spot on!
My estranged husband (I’m filing for divorce) is now trying to reconcile the relationship - being extra friendly/guess trying to win me back but too little too late with what I have been through which included violence. Staying amicable while the divorce goes through and after but he will never get me back as his partner! He is currently playing the victim in all of this - poor me/where am I going to live when the house is sold/I’ll be homeless/I don’t know what to do/wish I had the courage to commit suicide etc but apart from the suicide I am on the same situation! But people are falling for it - taking over my role that is “the mother figure” and doing things for him like looking out for houses on the internet which he is quite capable of doing only for him to reply “how am I going to be able to travel 200 miles to view these properties” - attention seeking! He is quite capable of doing this - it’s infuriating for his friends. He will never help himself and it is very difficult to understand this way of thinking for our friends - after knowing him for 50 years I don’t even try to understand - it just is!
She realized that she lost control when I took control of my own finances, closed our joint account and stopped filing joint taxes (she has a business and never paid her taxes resulting in IRS liens on the house). Once I did those things, she immediately began plotting my destruction - emotionally, spiritually and financially. She had already coopted my friends and relatives, so it was easy for her to pull the trigger on the smear campaign. She filed for divorce but has dragged the process out for going on 2 years (all the while accusing me of dragging it out) during which, she has done everything possible to keep my son away from me. Now that the divorce is within 5 months of termination, she seems to be doing all 4 things at once: finding alternate sources, trying to be nice to win me over, seeking revenge and hitting rock bottom. It would be comical if it weren't for the fact that I'm stuck in this mess. She flashes from being nice to horrible in the blink of an eye - quite erratic. I'm gaining quite a bit of insight from videos like this and find, by a miracle of God, that I'm not reacting the way I used to. I stay calm, don't give in to retaliation or even defense of myself. This is amazing progress because not long ago, I was questioning my own sanity. Thank you for your work.
My girlfriends ex is a full blown narcissist. We've been going no contact for two years. She has had two slips and broke no contact. Ive been accused of coercion, abuse, kidnapping and other vile things when first got together and each subsequent time she broke no contact. Each time i had denied him access to her he called the police with those accusations. The idiot. This last time when the cops showed up at my door I flat told them to get a warrent and to go away. Well after a few more weeks of drama that a**hole has been exposed, at least to the authorities. I hope they charge him with causing a false report.
Some are too good looking to ever be without supply, they don't care or hoover just move on. And saying looks fade doesn't matter, they'll just go with someone older.
I always go ye sure i'll follow your rules. In the end, nothing really happens anyway. Cuz he didn't make one.
mom only gets more vengeful/ bitter/ angry and makes things worse
Wrote a letter to me and another to my pastor full of libellous allegations and accusations
8 weeks free. First it was phone calls to both phones in the middle of the night. Then social media slander. Then he posted new girl friend on social media . That didn't work out. Then more social media slander. Now he is filing false tax fraud claims to the IRS. I promise you he is not done with trying to destroy me.. 18 year relationship. ... I filled a restraining order. ... I served my time.
Sorry his Anger
Posted photos of my personal life on fb to discredit me for her actions . She blocked me for 4 months so I found another partner. Then she blamed me . She gives me the silent treatments. This has been going on for 4 years. Iam always to blame. I have given her so much money to keep her from becoming emotional, but after a short time she finds fault in me out of no wear…?
I have had enough of being stepped on. I love her very much but she has pushed the boundaries to many times.
I was his primary supply so when I walked away he first tried to love bomb me. Then when that didn’t work he smeared my name and became vindictive. Eventually he hit rock bottom when others realized he’s not the nice guy he’s been portraying. Currently he’s acting nice (probably love bombing a few family members) and seems to have bounced back from his depression. How long will this last? I know he can’t keep that mask on for too long.
Thanks
And he’s going crazy
Just calling and texting when they felt like it I discarded him I have children a household around and to get me back
My ex-narc, in the final discard, tried to get my attention. Parking in the driveway with his NS, smear campaign with my friends, tried doting my friends, an acrimonious divorce, tried to beat up one of our kids, ran a smear campaign on him as well., called my place of employment and companied about me. I look at this list of shitty things and I think - he's so messed up, not right in the head.
He became angry with me when I broke up and went No Contact. When I tried to reach him 5 months later he was angry and acted like he didn’t know who was texting. I was just trying to give him back an expensive item I found while I was moving. I don’t intend to ever contact him and he no longer knows where I live. He is a cruel vindictive person. Ghosting at length for very minor reasons. Silent treatments from his hot headed, impulsive anger. I had to go no contact to break the Stockholm Syndrome. My friends never saw me like this because they said I’m such a strong woman. If I wasn’t going through a divorce when I met this narc, he probably wouldn’t be a person I would consider dating. I still have CPTSD from years of his mental abuse and my Trauma Bond.
🙏💖