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Should You Take Your Husband’s Last Name?
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- čas přidán 9. 10. 2014
- Getting married is a big deal, and for some women, changing your name is an even bigger deal. Find out why Tamar and Tamera decided to hyphenate their last names, and why Jeannie choose to keep hers the same, in this clip.
Find out where to watch: bit.ly/1y8pmiN
Now look at Jeannie-proudly taken Jeezy's surname. Real example of the right man will make you wanting to do anything
She hyphenated her last name, she didn’t change it
Yeah but just cause you take a last name that doesn’t mean you have a happy marriage. You can have one without taking a mans last name it’s your choice !
I get what you are saying @reema and I agree
I have the right man and I didn't take his name. 16 years hun and he's the love of my life. There will be no other but his name is a sentence long and I can't live like that lol. I would have taken his name if it were shorter though.
Facts, in Islam we don't take our husbands last name. We keep our fathers name as an honor to the family roots.
Right before my wife and I got married we had this discussion. I basically told her that the decision was hers and hers alone to make. If she wanted to change her last name outright, cool. If she wanted to hyphenate her name, cool. If she wanted to make her maiden name her middle name and take my last name, cool. If she didn't want to change her name at all, cool. It's her name, it should be her choice. Point blank.
Thank you.
So what did she choose if I don't mind asking.?
courtney hawkins She chose to keep her maiden name legally. It remains on all of her official documents and that's what she goes by at work. Socially however, she adopts my last name and moves her maiden name to be a middle name.
thanks for responding interesting but if yall happy then Im happy for you :)
courtney hawkins You're very welcome and I appreciate it!
I agree with Jeannie. I have a "foreign" last name too, and a huge part of my self development was coming to fully accept my heritage, my name and what it means. Doing away with it almost feels wrong. For that reason I would like to hyphenate.
Fiy Ade Would that last name happen to be Nigerian?
Yes! :)
I'm guessing from the "Ade" you're also a fellow Yoruba :)
I am. I can't hear the language though, sadly.
Can't hear or understand? I'm not fluent either but I'm pretty decent at understanding when it's being spoken
It's weird to think Jeannie is 37. She looks younger than that. Her, Tamar, and Tamera are around the same age.
Asian women stay 27 until they turn 65.
+Jonathon Lastname thank u for that id be lolling for days
@Never lose sleep over the small stuff I wonder what you look like?
Never lose sleep over the small stuff they don’t care for you anyways
'anyone hear Tamar say "hardtimes" at jeannies husbabands last name lol
+tito wilch I think so
+tito wilch I diiiiied, that's where all the shade started lowkey
+tito wilch they really are shady, all of them.
+tito wilch they really are shady, all of them.
Why am I just hearing this?! 😩 I’m Deadddd😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
"My son...T" Tamar made me die laughing
I didn't get that part 🤔
😂😂😂
Sondt lol
@@Watchvideossss It originates from "Periodt" ;D - it's when you want to stress that something is ultimate and indisputable. Tamar by saying "Son...T" meant he's the only kid she wants to have and doesn't plan to have any more.
2:30 - she accidentally said "kids" (plural) but then quickly corrected herself;)
I agree with Jeannie 100%. My name is my name me. Getting married doesn't mean you have change your identity.
Honestly, I would NEVER change my last name for not even the man I love, no shade lol. Like Jeannie said, my dad also came to the US when he was a teenager. Imagine not knowing how to speak well English. My parent's struggles is what made ME who I am today, literally. Lol. The name represents who I am, where me and my parents came from. Even in my religion, a woman shouldn't take her husbands name. This taking the husband's name is something that was passed down centuries ago, when women were given a man's name to be identified because they were a mans possession and people needed to know who she belonged to smh.
Well you're not married to your dad....
courtney hawkins lol your point?
Exactly, Girl!
Hahah right! I think u can have to names .no problem .
Awesome zebra I wouldn't care to be honest, because I am still ME regardless of what my last name is. Besides, my last name was given to me because my mother , chose to take my father's last name. So I find it funny how women who defend keeping their last name bc they don't want to feel like they belong to a man, are keeping a last name that required another woman giving up her last name so you can have one.
People kill me! You guys think Jeannie is in an unhappy marriage just because she wants to express her truths and problems from her marriage. Personally I think Jeannie is probably the most real person on the entire panel, because she will tell her story to the public no matter how crazy and deep it may be. Most marriages are not paradise, and a lot of the times couples have many problems. Hell, I bet half the people trying to critique her marriage have never been married their damn selves.
***** exact thing I wrote in a different post...every time she talks about her marriage and extending trips bc she likes hang in out I cringe and think girl u headed towards divorce sooner than later. I'm sorry bt I think she has 2 yrs and tht she in generous....ain't they on yr 7? They dnt call iy 7 yr itch for nothing. Ijs
No need to change the last name. It is sexist.
I am part colombian. In hispanic culture, the child takes both the mother and father's last name. My mother never changed her last name. And I carry both last names.
After all, it was my mother who carried me for 9 months. I was born via c section.
She more than earned that I also carry her last name.
I though you Americans were all about equality of the sexes.
I am not giving up my last name for anyone!!!!!
I do not agree. If I am Going through the pain of Labor. My child or children will have my last name just like I have my mother's last name.
Your name represents who you are. There's no reason you should change it (especially since I don't see anyone asking men to change theirs)
Vanessa Malone right like lmao
Thank you
bitch cz a man marries you, not the other way around
Game Junkie How does that make any sense, bitch?
Meaning you have to take his last name
If i ever get married, im hyphenating, i couldnt possibly remove all that family history, especially ethnicly speaking, a bit like jeannie was saying. xoxo
+Angie ExOh Me too! 2 last names, 2 separate bank accounts and 2 separate residences!
Angie ExOh how is a name change removing family history?
@@brianayoung4754 your essentially removing your identity
You were born Brianna Young. Your boyfriend’s name is Brianna Goldman.
Nobody will know you are apart of the young family. Your last name we can use to refer to your dad. It is easy to trace your family
Like I said, let the children keep your husband’s last name. Your not the property of men.
Why can’t the guy hyphenate. Problem solved
Crazy how Adrienne did exactly what she said she was going to do which is drop her last name for her husband's last name. She is now Adrienne Houghton and living her best life. Never seen her happier.
Bailon fit her better though. She should have kept it as a professional name.
The only thing that bugs me is this. When some people introduce a couple they say, "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith." It's when they try to completely take away the woman's first name like he is the only important one. In the end though, it does matter between the couple, no one else is allowed to make that choice and should stay in their own life. Like me personally, nope, I will not take anyone's name. This is my name, I love it and that's that.
and you are single lol...ask me how I know
Tyrone Biggums
Nope.
***** Is there something wrong with being single? You seem to have something to say about someone whom has chosen her own life. So explain your rude statement.
***** And I should listen to you? You're some very sad little man online. Really I could care less. And yes it is my choice. It's rather funny that you're trying to bully someone online. How sad.
***** You're not being honest though. What you said was illogical. To say that you speak for al men or even imply it is wrong. What if I were to say that you will always be alone because of you're opinion. I would be wrong because I don't speak for everyone. You shouldn't do that.
I love how Jeannie takes on the modern-day perspective of young women
My last name represents who I am and where I come from. I would never change it.
You're dad gave you that name that your mom took without being a bitch about it
+Kool Aid That was rude.
+Kool Aid my mom doesn't have my dads last name & I Use My dads and moms last name. Not all women want an expensive ring. Not every women has to change her last name if they don't want to.
+Prisci BeGa you're a feminist I get it but you don't have to lie to justify your movement
50Shot Duwop are you going to force or pressure her into her taking yours?
I wish they had talked about what happens when you take your husband's name from a viewer's perspective. They're all celebrities and keeping their last names are important to their livelihood. After I got married, I didn't take my husband's last name because I didn't want to change everything--passports, Japanese visas, residence cards, housing leases, insurance, medical coverage, American and Japanese licenses, and any other documents associated with my name. That's what really happens when you change your name.
Exactly it’s the inconvenience for me
I don't want to change my last name and if I had kids since I'll be going through pregnancy and childbirth it'd feel unfair to not have a part of my name in theirs. I'm with Jeanie, my last name feels like a huge part of my identity, I can't imagine life without it.
tiyabear nothing wrong with that.
Hows that working out for you lol
@@flex8707 I'm pretty sure it's great for her. I'm glad so many women including myself don't want to be seen as property. That child is mine as much as it is his.. if I carried the child, nursed, cared , my name will damn we'll be in it 😂
@@timchalamettt2770 not my women
And how did you come by that last name? Your Father, I'm sure and even if you take your mother's last name, it would still be your grandfather's name.
Adrienne's face at 0:43 "Why you screamin' like that girl?"
Lmao XD
*****
Her and loni both..the theatrics is tooooo much!
you never know what she could have REALLY been thinking. You’re a weirdo
In Spain women never change their last name when they get married. And when they have kids, the kids always have 2 surnames, their mum's and their dad's. And in fact, the mum's can perfectly go in the first place, it's up to the couple to decide that. So it really is stupid and illogical for me to think about changing my last name for my husband's when I get married. For me is like saying that now that I've married him I'm from his property and two things: first of all, a person is no one's property and second, if I did it, why shouldn't he do it as well? Does that mean I'm his, but he's not mine? That's just not fair, guys.
I totally agree with you! 👍 For centuries, women have taken their husbands last name and I'm surprised in this day and age that it is still happening as much. It's an expectation that shouldn't be there because it's actually asking the woman to leave behind a part of her younger self and who she was within her first original family. I love my surname because it represents a huge family with lots of great characters and talented, hardworking people. I'm going to stay McIntyre till the day I die. 👍
@@deirdremcintyre4276ikrr and the thing that sucks is how women really don’t have last names :/
If I ever get married, I love the idea of taking my husband's last name, I think it is so romantic, and I would feel like we really are one. However, I love my dad so unbelievably much that I would just end up hyphenating my last names. Best of both worlds, joining two family names.
Yea that’s what Corretta Scott King did when she married Martin.
Why can’t they do a session “should men take thier wife’s last name?
Because men would never do it unless they’re gay.
I proudly gave up my last name when I got married. I felt honored that my husband wanted to give it to me. I once wanted to hyphenate my name because my father died and it someway made me feel connected to him . But that is what my brother is for!!! I did not lose myself when my name changed. I became one with my husband and we began our own legacy!
I’m surprised at how many in the comment section here just don’t get that. Becoming one is a true miracle. Of course I changed my name. I’m honored as well.
@@a.c5949 lol very true
@@elegancepublicschool8191 just say you don’t understand singleton 🙄
@@alexkj101 the thing is that we're made to believe it is a honor for women
And insult for men
Won't argue with you anymore our perspectives are different
You believe sharing a last helps you feel United or one
And I believe name has nothing to do with unity
And becoming one is a spiritual thing
You have the last name of your father in law. You are keeping his legacy not making your own
I wouldn't it's my identity, it represents all my struggles and hardships
Its your dads name that your mom accepted lol.
@@flex8707 ok well the difference now is, that she doesnt want it changed again period. Her dad helped to create her, so did her mom. If her mom wanted to take her own name, then so be it. But it's still her identity. Her husband didnt create her, or carry her so why his name. Why not hers?
@ no he doesn't! i'm sure women are pretty capable of taking care of themselves. No girl, women, teen, or anybody should be a "responsibility." They should be an individual that is loyal and will never leave your side. That's like 1800's bs and i'm sick of hearing it.
I think it is definitely up to the woman. But why cant we both change our names? Why cant we both hyphenate our last names? I think I want to consider that as an option because like Jeannie said my last name is apart of my identity and I am sure my boyfriends is as well. So as a couple if we are joining then we should switch names noones name is more important than the other. I think that would be beautiful and I plan to do that with my future husband.
Bring Tamar back!
As a man, I will never take another man's name; meaning: I will never take my wife's name. Not gonna hyphenate it either. I can compromise by creating a new last name.
AlwaysAmeera I’m old school when it comes to this type of thing. You can do it however you want but I definitely want to take my future husbands name when I get married. It’ll make me feel good to take his last name. Also I’m super close to my family so for me taking my husbands last name will be my way of trying to get closer to him and his family. Having his last name will make me feel closer to his family.
there was a girl in my high school that had a hyphenated last name - all of her siblings did too because both parents decided to hyphenate their last names when they got married. it was forever long but whatever you want to do....
first of all,My wife will drop her last name or I wont marry her no discussion there. But what happens if you all hyphenate your names, what happens when your kids get married? they gonna hyphenate long as names already? you thinking for the now moment, try looking ahead
I swear, Loni wants Tamar's husband. She's always talking about Vince. xD
Loni and Tamar need to do a comedy show for video or something, my cheeks hurt from laughing! I love their topics on the show, it's like I'm just chillaxing with the girls at Starbucks or Applebee's for lunch. Congratulations to the Real for managing to transcend friendship and comfort through multi media. As for the topic itself, I think people have gotten so far from the traditional values in marriage that it's become sad. The last name used to have stature and value, it used to hold meaning in society for everyone, even the less fortunate. In some places you go and say your last name, people would ask if your related to other people with the same last name and if you were then (depending on the last name) it meant a good thing. Like other people just knew from your last name if you were "good people" based on your last name. But the dynamics of marriage have seemingly dwindled down to such selfish and shameful levels that nothing has merit or value about marriage any more. It's just my opinion.
If I ever get married I would like to hyphenate it. My dad only had girls and my entire dad’s family ) all his brothers ) only had girls so the last name “Perez” will not continue. I will cry tears of sadness if I change my last name completely. I will hyphenate to have the last name of my future husband and still have my maiden last name . I’m proud of being my father’s daughter, and I feel like I’m going to lose part of myself if i lose my last name 🥺 He did so much to build his family, he jumped over many obstacles. He now has his dream job and now is a US citizen. He taught me what a real man is . He treats my mother like the Queen she is . I was born with the last name Perez and I will die with that last name too .
And that's exactly why your marriage will end in divorce
@@rosequartz2290 babe maybe because yours did , doesn’t mean mine will. 😘
@@urbabygurl29 Oh yes he will, a relationship that lacks basic gender roles is bound to fail.
Secondly I'm still in my postgrad, studying human behavior and too young for marriage
@@rosequartz2290 That's not how it works sweetie. Do you have any proof? Go on, link it. I'll wait.
For Asians it different because it's very uncommon for Asians to take the last name.
Every marriage is different. Before I married I explained to my then fiancé why I wanted to keep my name and have a hyphenated last name. I didn't want to feel like I was throwing away or forgetting my roots and who I've always been before getting married.
you can tell tamar and tamera really love being married and their husbands with jeannie it's almost like she wants out
becuause she doesn't want to take her husbands last name?
I don't think she's even attracted to her husband. She refuses to have sex with him, she doesn't want kids, she can't cook, etc. the list goes on.
osimeon00 I do believe that Jeannie is attracted to her husband but like most marriages, they have ups and downs. Now, Jeannie has been married to her husband for seven years and when you work so hard, its possible to not be in the mood. Secondly, she has always not wanted kids. I don't think its any thing to do with her husband. I think, if she was married to someone else, she will still feel the same way. Her husband and her agreed to this arrangement from the beginning. I think if for any thing, she is even slightly considering it. About her not being able to cook, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. There are several women that do not know how to cook. I am sure her husband knew that before they got married but it didn't bother him. That has nothing to do with her being not attracted to him. It's just who she is. However, I don't believe that she just lets him starve. I am sure she has learnt to do a few things to give her husband when he is hungry and can't be bothered to cook.
osimeon00 first of all, who says that she refuses to have sex. if you watched the first season, a sex expert came on the show on one of the episodes and the next episode, she came on the show, saying that she tried some of the sex moves. and secondly, incase you didn't notice, it's the freaking 21st century. in this century a woman isn't enslaved in the kitchen. it's a choice for women nowadays. and it'sjust like when you hate doing the dishes or taking out the trash and some certain houseworks. she doesn't like cooking because it's her choice. she and her husband are a team, so if he loves her, he would take care of the cooking, while she does other housework. they could split the housework evenly. you never know. or they may just enjoy eating out. but that doesn't mean that she doesn;t love her husband
Jeannie to me seems more opened that the others that's all. Who knows what Tay Tay (Tamar) really thinks about her husband? not wanting to have kids does not mean you don't love your husband. I just think she doesn't realize she is saying so much and that we (the public) can perceive a negative image from her descriptions. Tamara seems fulfilled and happy and genuine.
when I was born in was given a name. so why would I change that? I'm very proud of it so no I wouldn't change it!!!
Historically, a woman had to change her last name to her husband's at marriage because she then became his property and divorced herself from her own family.
+Hanne Lykke Poulsen
That wasn't the case everywhere in the world though. Not every marriage concept in the world was based on property and ownership, yet last name changes were done.
There is a subculture I know of in South India where a man takes a woman's last name (probably for religious reasons) but definitely not out of ownership as far as I know.
Yes, but that is the exception, right! Why isnt it 50/50?
Hanne Lykke Poulsen
Not really. Marriage wasn't historically known everywhere as a sign of ownership. Some cultures, yes, but many others no. I cannot comment on whether that is the rule or the exception because in order to do that, we'd have to study every culture and see how they viewed their patriarchal and matriarchal practices.
It wasn't 50/50 because men and women had different responsibilities. A woman had to make sure the family did not crumble and men had to make sure that the family would not face any hardship externally.
People keep seeing women's roles in society as lesser because they stayed at home. I don't know why. If women did not manage the house and the family as well as they did, then men would not be able to get as far as they could in building the society.
Remember the saying, "Behind every successful man, there is a woman". Unfortunately, in this day and age, people fail to see just how integral and important the role of women has been in the household historically and fail to give credit to homemakers (most of which have been women).
which is why the father would 'give her away' at her wedding to her husband
@@qsqua Dude don’t mention India, we definitely view a wife as the husband’s property even now.
I'm a woman, and I will never change my last name. This is MY identity, and I will not give up who I am just to be someone else. My kids will have MY last name, and if my husband wants my last name he can take it. Women complain that they change it for their kids. How about your kids can have your last name and the husband can decided which last name he wants to have because it's unfair that woman have to change who they are because the husband wants the kids to have his last name. This children and last name thing needs to change. Anyone should be able to give their child whatever last name they want whether it's the wife or husband.
Michael Eaton Don't reply to the things I'm saying if you're going to say something ignorant and uncivil. You need to learn that there aren't only men in this world, and women have the right to do whatever they want just like men can. Ignorant men like you are ruining the world not feminist. Feminist are trying to make the world better. Besides, your mother is a woman. Without her, you wouldn't be here.
Women and men are equals. Neither gender is superior. Grow up, and open your eyes. The world is chaging and you either need to accept that or live the rest of your life miserable because you won't get what you want.
+Candice Is Flawless once again brainwashed feminist idiot you don't get it. no one said one was better than the other. However, men are men and women are women. men have a natural instinct to be a certain way and so do women. men are the hunter gatherers and protectors. its nature. women are the nurturers. its nature. let men be men and women be women. its the way they are created to be. this bullshit feminist agenda to disrupt what is natural is why no one can stay together anymore. tragic.
Michael Eaton Cool. Great. You can have your opinion while I will have mines.
Michael Eaton you sound stupid. How does a name affect "natural order"? Men like you just use that excuse for your barbaric behavior. Smart men like me who understand that women aren't our possessions are making this world a better place, while misogynistic idiots like you are slowly dying off...Survival of the fittest at its finest.
I don't think changing your name means you lose your identity. I changed my last name when I got married, I didn't loose myself. For me changing my name represented a new chapter in my life.
Jeannie Mai changed her last name now ...now she is Jeannie Mai Jenkins. I love it!!!
She didn't change just hyphenated
I have no issue if a woman wants to change her name but I wouldn't do it most because of the history of why women do it. It's because when a woman became married she was passed over from being owned by her dad to be owned by her husband, it's an ownership label historically. And if a man decides to take his wife's name it's often seen as a joke or emasculating by general society cos the concept is 'lowering' himself' which is obviously course bullshit. So the idea leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I would consider a hyphen name if the man was also changing the name to a double name too tho
so I'm guessing you wouldn't want your father to give you away at your wedding either smh
+Tyrone Biggums why are you such a judgmental jerk this is the second nasty comment that you left. It's honestly none of your business what people choose to do with there last names
+Tyrone Biggums What's it to you? And you're actually right, the connotation of having your father give you away at the aisle to your husband is the same as taking your husband's last name - it is a transferral of ownership just like +Kerraldine Holland said. SAME with the fiancé asking the father for the daughter's hand in marriage. Why aren't you asking the mother? Why are you asking for her HAND? literally go read a book, you are making such an embarrassing mess of yourself rn
eve n everything you just said I know...the whole idea of marriage is based off and exchange between two men...so I take it you won't get married at all because this is where it comes from you Dumbass ... The whole point of a wedding dress and brides maids is based of preparing and presenting yourself worthy to the other family...women were traded off for cows and raw materials.That's what marriage is about
Tyrone Biggums "so I take it you won't get married at all because this is where it comes from you Dumbass" Um and if I don't??? lmao this is what i don't get - if i don't want to support the institution of marriage because of all of these horrible reasons, what is it to you? have a seat please lol
and here we are.... Mrs. Jeanie Mai Jenkins LOL
I've been thinking about this too, and I CANNOT imagine myself with another name. I have identified with this name my WHOLE LIFE... It is a major part of who I am because it shows exactly what my heritage is (Sri Lankan) and I love that about it considering I am an Australian. My friends always joke about how I will marry a Smith, but Ben Smith??? It sounds like some crap name you put on a fake ID. I think I will keep my last name because I want to be recognised as a Sri Lankan.
If you think about how the changing of the name originated...because a daughter went from being the property of her father to being the property of her new owner, her husband, yeah, it's not even a beautiful tradition to keep. Basically, it erases the matrilineal line of ancestry and a woman's identity.
+thaliasghost feminist bullshit has done you well.
Ben J that's interesting and a cool way to think about it. Just asking but are you Sri Lankan or Tamil?
If you want to be recognized as Sri Lankan then why don't you live in Sri Lanka? If you chose to live in Australia, and Australia lets you, then you should be grateful to Australia. You should want to be recognized as Australian. You seem disrespectful to your host country. You can't have it both ways. You either be a genuine Sri Lankan and live in Sri Lanka, or you be a sellout and live in Australia. It appears you are a sellout who lives in Australia. Playing up your Sri Lankan heritage doesn't change this. It's just a coping mechanism.
@@ion6538 what the hell? When did Ben state that being Australian was bad or didn't like it. All Ben stated was when she gets married, why would she change her name. Smith isn't even Australian so what point are you trying to make. And how is it freaking disrespectful to not have her husband's name who is Australian, just because she is in Australia.........you make no sense plz check yourself.
Why don't the kids take the mom's last name? Then the husband can take the wife's last name, and everyone has the same last name. Problem solved.
Wouldn't that be their grandfather's or grandmother's last name???
bcz u are marrying a high profile man not beta man , u are marrying a rich worthy man who will decide whom he will marry he chooses u so u have to take his last name like donald trump wife did .
Worst take i even heard.....you can throw that idea in the bin......
Not today.... I think when a man runs from a woman coz of responsibility of the baby..the woman should never name the kid after the man.... But as long as the man is there.... No chance...it's all about the name of the family head...even culture itself can't hold the argument... responsibility does
I say do what you want. If you want to take his name you should! If you don't you shouldn't. If he wants to take your name why not! Nobody should force you to do anything.
I am with Adriane. I always knew I wanted to my husbands last name when I got married... Then guess what happened... I ended up marrying someone with the same last name as me! 😂
I am a husband. I told my wife when we got married, you already have a name, why would you need a new one? You are who you are, and my name is mine. I also told her, I liked her name, so I might just take hers, but Wang is not a really good name for a guy who is not Chinese!😁
I don't see why Tamar said wait until you have kids, because parents can hyphenate the kids last name. Tamera could have done the same. My mom has her last name, my dad has his, and I'm hyphenated. It's not that hard to do.
+sasukefroupie Exactly. I kept mine & my son has both of ours hyphenated. Changing your name doesn't make you married or prove your devotion. I tell every guy that thinks his family should have one name to consider taking his wife. Then you hear about how it's "not done that way" or it's not right or traditional.
+ShinbiBelldandy so your granddaughter will have a triple hyphenated last name when she gets married huh?? smh
+Tyrone Biggums it's all about surname equality. She can choose to keep or alter her name as she sees fit. Your name doesn't automatically change when you get married, you have to change it.
It's easy for females to hyphenate last names however what happens when that female chooses to marry? Can she add another name to this order? I don't understand hyphenation of a child's name. Children in the US traditionally take the name of the father unless there is debate on lineage or the mother gives the child her name if she is single (not married).
+sasukefroupie I did that for my son but it's annoying as fucks because people keep using only one surname!
I definitely feel where Jennie was coming from. I had the hardest time adjusting to changing my name after I got married. It felt foreign to me. I didn't feel like myself. My husband insisted I take his last name. He wasn't even going for the hyphen thing either. To this day, almost 8 yrs later, it's still weird.
Shaunte Foreman but what's it matter tho? your social security number didn't even change.
shaunte foreman im with ur husband
Shaunte Foreman what do you mean insisted? Lol like you didn’t have a choice???
mixolyd amen
That’s a horrible husband
2:10 "Hard times"
😂Love her man.
The reason its tradition to take your husbands last name is because it was how a woman was marked as her husbands property. Same reason any children get the mans last name. Marriage in general was created as a way to combine property between families. Men would marry off their daughters to men of other families to expand their families land etc. Any self respecting woman wouldn't take a mans last name.
Destiny Rodriguez
Well I'm just basing what I said off of America's history and marriage system. Since this is an American centric talk show.
what
+Tyler Wolff Nor take alimony.
Tyler Wolff ig im not slef respecting its always the women who like to say self respecting often are single and look like men
2:10 "Hard Times!" 😂😂😂 Tamar play too much
im glad that as a latina i dont have that problem, we have 2 last names and everyone keeps their own identity. there is no pressure on changing your name because your kid would still have your last name.
Fast fwd, Jeanie is now Jeanie Mai Jenkins...life comes full circle huh lol
I got married, and did not change my name. I don’t “belong” to my husband, I feel like that idea is antiquated. I don’t want to leave the identity I’ve had all my life. He completely understands, and I appreciate that, because why the f does it matter? In casual conversation, I do go by “Mrs. His Last Name”, because it’s cute and romantic now and then. But I will always be myself.
This is the dumbest thing i ever heard
Super Mom It’s my life. If you feel differently, I respect that. It’s a personal choice. I thought about it for a long time before I made my decision. I felt like the only question involved was what other people would think, and ultimately, that doesn’t matter to me. I’d like to hear why this is the dumbest thing you’ve ever heard, just to understand your perspective and why you would react that way.
@@hilarygarstang5066because you talking about you don't want to leave your identity you had all your life you will be only leaving name not who you are and it don't mean you belong to your husband people have the wrong idea about that
Super Mom I agree that women don’t belong to their husband, no matter what. That being said, the tradition of taking on a husband’s name began in a time when women had no legal rights of their own outside of being married. Nowadays it doesn’t make a difference. I think it is a beautiful symbol of unity to take your husband’s name...it just doesn’t mean the same thing to everyone. Are you married, and did you take your husband’s name? Im interested to learn how it feels to be on the other side of the opinion.
@@hilarygarstang5066 Yes I am married and yes I did take his name i had no issue with it my son have his name for me it was about comment, unity, spiritual we are one you see it way different from how I see it
Tamar really said "Jeannie Hard-Times" @ 2:09 OMG LOL
NO ONE is surprised that Adrienne forfeited her surname. She's the most traditional of all of these women.
It's not traditional of her..Adrienne just loves love. She'll do anything for a man.
If I get married anytime soon, I would absolutely take my husband’s last name. It’s not that I don’t want my last name anymore but I just want the world to know that I got married!
Why is the man not changing ? Why should she change
exacly
Mine Haus
WHEN FILLING OUT YOUR LICENSE FORM
YOU DO HAVE A CHOICE YOUR HUSBAND CAN TAKE YOUR NAME!!
Right??? If I ever plan on getting married in the future and hyphenating my last name with my husband’s name, I’d expect him to do the same damn thing with my last name. In marriage, two become one; so I never understood growing up why taking *each others* last name to form as one wasn’t a common thing...
@@naylani7790 have fun dating a beta lol
@@flex8707 she will. How about you can marry your dad since you want your partner to have the same name lol. 🤣 It's really not that hard you know? Or...you can follow your MGTOW community and stay unmarried. That's not hard either 😘
LOLOL!!! @ Tamar's reaction to herself when she said kids. Hilarious!
Tamar gone say some “hard times” 😂😂😂
That whole changing your last name to your husband's is medieval.
Exactly with a touch of caveman mentality bs
I could not WAIT to take my husband's name!! But I do get where they are coming from with their careers.
Take it or don't. Why is this a "should you" question to begin with?
If a woman won't change her name then she shouldn't mind a prenup or separate bank accounts
I luv this show and enjoy the jokes u guys tell. LOL!!!!
spicegoddess (kania) Glad to hear you are loving the REALness!!! Keep getting REAL with us, and spread the word!
The Real Daytime I really like the show but I think more people would enjoy it if it was live and could discuss current hot topics as well.
+The Real Daytime this segment was done the same exact topic and Loni made the same exact joke. why? was it just a practice run or something
+The Real Daytime not no more show is👎👎👎👎👎👎
I'm with A on this. Old school also my father unfortunately hates his father's last name because he abandoned him and so why should I keep a last name that my own father doesn't even want.
LOL. Loved this clip. Side note: Tamar is tooo hilarious!
tamar said "hardtimes" lmaoo
culturally, most Vietnamese women keep their family names as did their mothers and grandmothers. i've only met a few Viet Americans and Viet Canadians who change or hyphenate their names. i feel for Jeannie being scrutinized that "her marriage has problems". your family name is arbitrary and whichever you choose to have after you get married, you always have some strong affective reason for using it. go Jeannie!! go Real!
Now when I see/hear Jeanie talk about marriage dealings I think she would have to be with someone who really shares her same outlook on life. She's a very free spirit.
I'm not changing my last name. Also half of my kids will get my last name and the other half will get my husband's last name. I think it's weird that one half of the lineage just disappears.
that sounds basic Jessica Johnson 😂
the fact that i am the only son, and the only person who can carry on my family name, is enough for me to say no
Tamar said it sounds too much like hardtimes! Bwahaha 😂😂😂
My poor self needs to hurry up and get a TV so I can watch the full episodes.
I did not change my last name.we were married 19 years.
Loni Love Handles 😂😂😂😂 more like Loni Love Boat 😂😂😂😂
I don’t think having kids is a legitimate reason to have to or feel you have to change your last name. Your children could also carry both parents last names. Ex. Alex Johnson Simpson. That’s what most Latino cultures do and I love it because you get to represent both families and mom does not feel left out.
Kids might grow up and change their last names anyway. I don't get what's the big deal about kids last names. They're always going to be your kids regardless.
I really did consider and push for our last names to be hyphenated, but both of our last names are two or more syllables, and they both end in "y" and tbh everyone always pronounced my last name wrong and I'm tired of correcting them, and it's not a weird or foreign last name but lots of people pronounce it differently and it is just a hassle but my husbands last name you cant mispronounce it wrong, and his last name is classic and kind of those all american last names, and it really does shock me how I dont have my maiden name anymore like I'm a newlywed and I'm just getting used to saying his last name instead of my maiden name but at the same time, it's fun, having a new last name you get to have this rush of kind of getting to reinvent yourself so I didnt hyphenate my last name I just took his.
I would LOVEEE to change my last name. Something about it just makes you feel so special and warm inside. Like your his and he loves you and you're one together. I just love it and the idea
ShaiHuludisCool I prefer taking his last name
I'm have both my husband's last name and my maiden name hyphenated. My husband said I want you to still have your last name as it's something you had since birth. I decided to have both because I've started a new family with him and I still identify myself as my old family. My daughter has both last names and not hyphenated because in Latin countries it's normal to have two last names. Both your father's and mother's last name. I only got my dad's last name unlike my siblings born in Mexico that have both my parents last names.
As of right now, I feel like when I get married, I would want to take my husband's last name.. But I understand where everybody is coming from. I think it depends on how the couple feels about last names. My mom took my dad's last name but when we're around her old friends, they always call her by her maiden name, Cato. On her social media, she puts her name as Priscilla Cato Glenn because she's always been known as Cato. But I also know of some people who don't change their last names or they hyphenate. I think it just depends on personal preference.
I wouldn't want to give up my last name personally. It's always been apart of my identity and I don't think I could handle changing it.
Tamera the Disney Chanel guy used to announce you as Tamera “Moow-ree” so you worked hard for that🤣🤣🤣
I am not complaining about that at all! If you had a last name like mines, youd be willing to change it in a heartbeat.
I just read your surname and it's so sweet
I love your last name. It's unique, I've never seen it before. I'd take yours over mine though.
I love your last name. It's unique, I've never seen it before. I'd take yours over mine anyday.
I love your last name. It's unique, I've never seen it before. I'd take yours over mine anyday.
My surname is a typically east african surname & I used to hate it but as I started to grow closer to my culture I grew to love it and I honestly can't imagine changing it:P
I agree with Adrienne in this I am taking my husbands last name no hyphen! I think it is a personal preference to be honest there is no wrong or right in this matter☺
i like to hyphen the name
6 years laters and now she is Jeannie Mai Jenkins
I took my husband's name. Was a 4 letter difference in the middle of my last name. It took a minute to stop signing my maiden name, but I love having his last name. I was in love with who I was before and I'm in love with who I am now. My name didn't change any of that. All it changed was from oh your so and so's daughter to oh your his wife. Damn right I am. I wear my parents and my family in my face and my actions, and I wear my husband on my left hand and in my name.
Oh cool no matter how much I dislike the tradition it's kinda cute
I mean everything has its pro and cons
Right?
None of them consider it even fathomable that their husband take their name.
That's very unlikely to happen. You're basically asking a man 2 demasculate
Mrbaltimore2001 what? 😂
If they wouldnt take their husband's why would the husband take theirs?
@@Mrbaltimore2001 emasculation? What is the custom even doing to her position? It’s weakening her position. the only way this to change is more couples taking a stand against this toxic ideologies and normalizing wife’s names/ new names/ other options so that some knuckleheads can get used to it. I would say this sexist social norm accepted by large
@@Mrbaltimore2001 what is society getting out of her? It is literally dangerously reproducing “husband is the authority and woman is to obey”. No he is not the authority. There are cultures where she is actually out to be. My blood boils...I immediately wants to say she be the authority and he obeys.
Changed my last name after getting married last week . My husband left it up to me but I could also tell it meant alot to him if I'd take his name ... the smile he gave me at the social security building I'll never forget
yeah!
Hope you like being your husband's property
Tamar...''jeanie hardtimes"..I done!! Lmao
I would NEVER give up my last name, it's my father's my grandfather's and I will NEVER take the name of another person. This is my identity, and I love it. Changing it would be giving up who I am. Mariage is just a pretext for church to make us women inferior to man.
+Julie Carlier it's just a last name my God. It literally is just a personal decision but don't try to make others feel bad for doing it either. It doesn't mean you're inferior.
+Abigail Jones I ain't trying to feel bad anybody, I'm just sharing my opinion, and I will not shut it down just because you don't share my view.
For me, it is just a bad tradition which stay in our mœurs, women took the name of the men because they were seen as a propriety, they were aloud to do nothing, own nothing, and honestly even be nothing except a man's wife. I know marriage is not about that anymore (well most of the time), then why the women should still be the one who change their name?! Why the children they gave birth to should still have the name of the father ?!
+mikoda read again my last comment
Lol and Adrienne stuck to it! Go you darling!♥ watching in 2017
Tamar was killing me at 2:08 lmao saying that man's name like that!
"Loni Love-Handles" 😂😂😂😂😂😂 she kills me!
My family has a tradition of not giving females middle names so when they marry, they can have their maiden name as their middle name, which is what I did. I wasn’t initially going to change it, but my sweet husband wanted it so badly (he respected it was my choice, he’s just a romantic and loved the idea of us sharing a name) I did, and I’m happy I did. I still have my maiden name and it’s a part of me, but we also get to share a name, and you know what? That’s awesome. You do what works for you.
So why didn't your husband just take your last name?
I'm glad in our culture we don't have this problem. The woman keeps her last name bc it's her identity. Her last name identifies her bloodline. What sense does it make to change it?
Kindah What culture?
Last name was a way to mark families as we went from being tribes to living in towns. women eventually changing last names it was apart of saying she in her husbands family not her fathers. Back in the 19th and 20th century men often took wives last names. Usually because family had no males or wife was of higher social/financial situation. Name change is a english idea in origin. I plan to hyphenate my name because like Tamera, especially Jeannie and Tamra were saying I worked for my name to make it something great .
Loni Love Handles 😂🤣😂😂😂😂
Where I live, changing your last name to your husband's isn't even a thing, so this is interesting to see. I agree with Jeannie on this one; if I were to live in a community where changing your last name is common, I won't change it. My name is my name, and I don't see why I need to take on someone else's.
I am not in a relationship, but I have thought about this and the thought of changing my last name seems strange to me. I might want to hyphenate my name... I feel like my last name is an important part of who I am!
Adrienne said she would take her hubby’s last name and she did just that! I think that is romantic especially when celebrities do it!
lmaooo… "kids…don't speak that in ya life girl…holup…holdup…take that back...my SONNNNTUHHH" that had me soooo weak omg
Why should a woman change her last name ?!
Giving up my last name completely!