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How Do Spy Agencies Actually Recruit Spies in Real Life?
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- čas přidán 27. 11. 2022
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Okay Simon.
So, if we all get that Manscaping stuff and "do" THE WHISTLER (completely bald & smooth up top with an abrasive, impenetrable thick thicket down below) do you guarantee we'll all become as rich, successful and charismatic as your suave MF self?
Well?
WILL WE?!
Testicles hang loose. Why would they need a toner?
i so hope in 40 year's you will have made a video detailing how you were a Spy all along.
I always laugh so hard whenever I see this ad. Women don't care about if men shave down there.....they just want to get their own back on men who ask women to torture themselves with waxing, high heels etc...... Still laughing that men fall for this.
@@lilibug. maybe we do it for our selves ? its really not great having a beard like Samson's in my pants, especially not in summer! XD
My father was an elecrical engineer from the U.K. Growing up, we travelled all over the world, mostly to 3rd world countries to help set up power dams, water treatment plants, infrastructure type stuff. Usually the contracts would be from 18-24 months at a time, so by the time he retired in 82, we had lived in roughly 7 different countries. When he passed in 2008, my older brother and I were helping our mother move house when we came across a locked trunk in the basement. She had no idea what it was so we opened it. There was some pretty odd stuff in there, all kinds of documents, records, diaries written in code. There were ceremonial swords and robes, really weird stuff. Looking back at the places we lived; Central and South America, China, Saudi Arabia, Egypt, it would make sense that my father was a spy, but James Bond he was not!!😎
Possibly, or he may have just been a member of any number of secretive fraternal orders, like the Masons or Knight's of Columbus for example.
I wonder, he might have been a freemason. The swords and robes sound ceremonial rather than spy related.... But could have been both
@@nejm612 "Soy"... lol
@@badreality2 A soy spy, maybe?
OTO found
So Simon either works for an intelligence agency or is making a public pitch to be recruited.
@@joeypitts140 it’s a scammer.
@@ardenalexa94 Tf are you talking about? xdd
Simon can neither confirm nor deny this but if you use promo code to the CIA you may find the answer
By Manscape?
He def does propaganda for nato sometimes. As a nato supporter i do not care.
Simon Whistler: speaks Czech, lives internationally, extremely well spoken and well written, has business education, up-to-date on current affairs and has long online history.
Simon is an agent or operative, 100%.
If he knows Czech he'll have a pretty easy time learning other Slavic languages
And he has gadgets...
So... is he like a bald version of "Spy x Family"? hahah...
I mean, just look at his outfit!
Business education? I'm fairly certain he went to Law School, not Business School.
Simon rattled off those potential candidate requirements pretty easily....🤔🤔🤔
"cure for male patter baldness"
"Variety of CZcams channels"
"We all knew you were a Spy!" "You are an amateur and a fool!" "I'll see you in hell... you handsome rogue!" "You are an embarrassment to Spies everywhere!"
Lives in the Czech Republic, travels abroad, speaks multiple languages, has broad knowledge due to your job… yeah he did 😂😂
@@SilentRacer911 I thought the weirdest part was when he said, "It's good if you're named Simon too" 🤔😹
@@finlay9616 honestly the weirdest thing is the straight delivery of all the hints. I'm so used to business blaze Simon
Simon covering up his spy duties perfectly by listing how perfectly he'd fit into the requirements for being a spy. 😆
NOC list, LOL.
Simon might be a perfect agent. Calm, unassuming, friendly and can disarm people by saying “I make CZcams videos for a living” BAM no one suspects a thing
"calm" - you have watched his reactions to the Casual Criminalist episodes that involve murdered children, yeah? LOL, that and he mentioned in one of the last episodes I watched where he mentioned he has a temper and accidentally broke a spatula while making eggs because of his anger. XD
Simon to a prospective agent: " go ahead and SMASH that pen onto this contract and sign your name to work for us!"
Agent recruit: "but don't spies always get caught and killed?"
Simon: "that's all in the past my friend; nothing like that happens anymore! The past really was the worst."
All the spies at conferences makes me imagine that some conference has no one attending except for spies or academics already on a spy agency's pay roll.
Seriously😂😂😂. Just a room full of spies, who know everyone else is also a spy. They probably play "I spy" with each other.. Trying to pick out who is or isnt undercover lol
“Officers who are extremely well rounded and diverse in terms of their hobbies and skills or have a broad knowledge set from running multiple educational CZcams channels are highly sought after.”
… Sounds like Simon would be a good candidate considering his knowledge, now if he could only manage to remember the content of his videos he previously recorded. Lol.
*Saying* you don't remember and actually not remembering are two different things. Columbo made that style famous.
Intelligence agencies probably use mind palaces to store useful information and dismiss what isn't
Most stuff isn't important and you can simplify it into something more abstract to act as a trigger to that information without having to hard memorize it, a thumbnail and a description go really far in painting the context so the mind can fill in the details
squints at Tom Scott
Your a plant to subtly turn us away from the truth that he is already an operative.
Don't lie to us. We know the truth!
When I was in elementary school, I told my dad I wanted to be a spy for the CIA.
He told me to never be a spy, because he said they aren't good people... Now, I don't think that spies are necessarily bad people, regardless of what dad said, but I do wonder how he came to form that opinion. He was never in the military and as far as I can tell, there's no evidence he would have ever met a spy.
However, I do know he once worked as a roofer on a hanger at an air force base in California. No one in my family ever talks about that time in his life and when I asked him about it, he always said he was just a laborer working on a hanger.
A roofer. Working on a hanger. Hangers are sheated in metal. Why did they need a roofer? Why did he seem to know something about spies?
If he were still alive, I would have some very serious questions for him. Especially why he let me join the USAF, knowing I wanted to be a CIA officer??
I'm not with the CIA and they never approached me. But did they recruit my father and he never told anyone? I will never know.
Honestly, probably for the best, in my opinion.
I would also point out, he made me promise that if he let me join the USAF (he had to sign my paperwork, because I was 17 and doing the DEP} that I would join NASA instead of the intelligence community. At the time, I didn't think anything of it, because we were both fascinated by space and space travel. But looking back on it, it's as if he didn't want to discourage me from the USAF but wanted me to stay away from the intelligence community.
Again, I'll never know the truth. And again, I feel it's for the better. If he was an agent or asset for the CIA, there's a reason he didn't want me to be a part of it, and if he didn't want to tell me why, then I probably don't want to know why.
He was very good man, even with his faults, and I've always trusted him. So as they say, I'm happy to let sleeping dogs lie.
My aunt has worked with various agencies in the US, and said the part she always hated the most was when they had to throw sources to the wolves if the investigation went south.
As an academic, hearing about how much spy craft hinges around our conferences is kind of hilarious. The bit about bumping into someone and just having them see your face is something, that I already figured out is a good way to network generally.
I visited the International Spy Museum in Washington DC several years ago. It was an eye-opening experience. The overall impression was that being a spy requires an atypical personality.
I actually moonlight as a vampire hunter on the government’s contract. Never seen a real vampire? You’re welcome.
I have. Two of them and they both work for the government. 😉
This is the CIA would you like a job
@@phillydterminaldisease6578 Why? The vamps and the reptilians work for the government. ExXCeLlSsIoR S.S.T./S.A.T. Elite
Thank you for your hard work
Well I hunted werewolves for many years. One day I got bit by one. Now it's much harder to do that job since I tend to be pretty busy on the full moon. 😂
I imagine the conferences just being 100% spies in the room.. and everyone there knowing it😅
Ahem....Mentlegen
Or even more funny, NOBODY knowing it and they're all trying to recruit each other for the same few agencies 😂😂
my mom almost became an agent for the fbi (maybe cia, i forget)
she was like… almost signed up and stuff. But she had a friend in the agency that was like “hey, uh, you won’t be doing anything cool. since you’re a pretty blonde lady you’ll probably be an… other kind of agent” or something like that. Anyways, my mom didnt want to become a government issued super seducer so she got out of that whole thing.
Thanks mr agent man, without that warning i wouldn’t exist
My great uncle was the head of the FBIs NC satalite facility. My father went through a similar process, he even wound up being sent training films and stuff, but then they changed their mind because they didn't like the fact his car was still registered in a previous state he lived years prior (cheaper taxes), they felt it counted as fraud.
Honeypotting is a good tactic.. not a good job though
The amount of times that he eludes to himself being an Operative is amazing xD
He alludes, then he eludes ....definitive ID , by changing the subject. ;)
Autistic here so lasr person to judge. Though would be interesting since i love him but his videos are so dull and relaxing they actually put me to sleep. Not even in a bad way i actually use them as an adult version of a bed time story where i put a video on and crash half way into its run.
Thank you; finally lol.
This was the comment I was literally searching for. Now back to today's video 😂.
The question is for whom?
I was recruited by ASIO, the Australian spy agency out of uni. I don't know why. They had a 5 stage interview process, which I failed on the last one, which was a role play. So there ya go, it does happen.
Asio is the counter espionage agency, which it protects Australia from foreign threats. Asis does the spying stuff.
@@veyolaski4324 sorry you are correct, I get them mixed up. I believe it was ASIO that handled the contacting of us and all that, but I may be wrong. Was a long time ago.
@@dylanbigg8288 well I guess they still recruit students from uni to infiltrate a political party or somethin :D. They used to do that back in the 1950s when cold war was happening.
Lol Australian spy
They gotta keep an eye on the Emus
My great grandfather was an agent for MI6 in the 2nd world war. we didnt know until 2016 when we requested details and Mi6 had to declassify them
I bet he had some great stories
One of those jobs where I wouldn't want someone to tell me that I am being "terminated".
that and being a future resistance member serving under John Conner
I don't think you want that in any job
Getting retired, Bladerunner style 😳
@@alexanderwu of course you don't want that in any job, the point here is, the phrase "terminated" for us laypeople mean we lose our livelihoods, while "terminated" for spy agencies mean we lose our lives🥵🥶
Be careful if Simon asks you for lunch…he might be a Czech operative, cos if he really was a Brit he could definitely name all of the Beatles and pronounce the names of northern English towns🤫
ha!
That made me laugh. Soooo many examples of him getting it wrong.
😅
Heavy doses of "ALLEGEDLY" in this one lol
This is by far my favorite TIFO episode, and I've watched them all. Very, very cool info. Kudos to all in the execution of this fine lesson in clandestine ops.
BTW, Simon's beard needs a proper fluffer (the barber type).
Frankly with those techniques, I’d love if someone wrote a book about someone using their techniques as an MLM hunbot to recruit agents to the CIA lol. Because the first thing I thought if they described that was “well, I’d fail as a possible recruit right off the bat because I’d assume they were trying to sell me something if they tried that hard to get to know me” lol
My favorite professor “spied” for the CIA. It was a course on comparative education about Russian schools. Mobin was a ham radio operator and had command of 15 languages, many of them central Asian. They would talk to him from time to time to ask, “What’s going on over there?” After our mid term in class essay he told me he wished more than anything that he could write as well as me. Lol. I said I’d trade that talent for three languages, Arabic, Farsi, and Urdu.
Farsi is easy. And if you learn farsi you’ll know a good amount of urdu and Arabic as well because they share a lot of words
I finally figured it out. Simon is actually a French female agent named Simone Whistlier covering as a British, male prolific CZcamsr living in Prague. Busted!
i see it now
The beard is so good it must be fake. 😂
My Grandfather was O.S.S. during the war, took orders directly from William J. Donovan. Hell, General MacArthur is one of my father's godfathers, alongside General Josef R. Sheetz and Colonel Mcintyre. My grandfather joined C.I.A. in its first days and remained in the service until the day he died (no, there is no star for him). We didn't put the pieces together until years after his passing, that's how good he was at keeping it a secret. My Uncle on my mom's side of the family was a clandestine officer who retired at 26 and never paid taxes again for the rest of his life under G14 tax exempt retirement for "services rendered to the United States Government." He hinted at and poked fun at the topic, but he never said anything serious, other than you didn't want to be on the wrong side of him. Today, they hire you out of high school and you are an operative/asset until you're sent on a foundation assignment (FA=assignment to establish high trust, usually a high risk -high reward type of deal). If you make the grade, they assign you with more understanding of what you're actually doing. But don't expect more information. It's still pretty Go to "A" and do "B" type of thing. So, to clarify, you may actually be a spy and not know it these days until you're required to be of service and know that's what the service is.
"...they try to ensure at the end of the day the agent being terminated leaves with a positive feeling..."
What a weirdly chilling way to say that.
My grandfather was in the CIA, but he rarely ever felt comfortable talking about his work, even after being retired for over 20 years. I wish he had though. Imagine the stories.
Maybe he wasn't just a harmless recruiter but an eraser! - the sort of thing NPR magazine wouldn't find anyone to talk about, and of course Whistler has no information on either(or pretends not to so he can keep his real job as a Company man while pursuing this CZcams channel side hustle)
@@jamespower5165 Simon's probably the head honcho secretly.
If you are an agent, no one else can know. Whatever you do or have done in the C.I.A. is classified and can't be communicated with a civilian or any other agency in the D.I.A. If any information is unveiled to a civilian by an agent, that said agent is classified as "Rogue" and deemed a threat to Homeland Security. "R.E.D." does not stand for Retired, Extremely Dangerous like the movies may tell you
@@tskraj3190 I've never heard of that acronym. What does it mean, then?
@@chrisshorten4406 That's classified. 😉
In Norway, when I was young, you just had to apply for the only Russian speaking language course in the country. You would get an offer if you were suited.
Must have been MI6 who built Simon, that must be how he is capable of having such a good cover story, and maintain a secret life.
So are you willing to tell us if you were recruited or if you volunteered? 🤔
They literally just take applications. "Special Intelligence" and "Intelligence Analysts" are degree paths at many universities.
@@michaelmayhem350 wouldn't it be great.
Q:How do you become a spy?!
A: Send a resume...
video, 5sec long
@@michaelmayhem350 I stand corrected.
Joanna Mendez has a number of absolutely fascinating interviews on CZcams. She frequently does special talks with the International Spy Museum.
The whole thing about government sponsored conferences makes me wonder if any of those ever happened at my place of work. I am a student assistant at the conference office attached to my university and while there haven't been any nuclear science related conferences there (to my knowledge) we do have conferences related to engineering regularily.
This was sooo good! Absolutely loved the level of information and detail involved! Thanks Simon!
I always wanted to be a secret agent, but my knees usually crack when I squat, so I never pursued it. It doesn't hurt, it's just too loud for sneaking around.
But that could be the perfect cover. People would look at your loud knees and think "Now there's a guy that could never be a spy"
Just to say that i love you Simon, man that spirit of yours is one of a kind.
I totally recommend "Inside the Aquarium" book, about realities of Soviet GRU in 1970s
If you ask why GRU and not KGB it's exactly the answer, GRU was the actual secret service for the foreign operations and barely anybody knew of it's existence at all
I was a secret agent that was so secret I didn't even know I was an agent. Turns out the best way to use a person is to not use them or tell them anything whatsoever. 😄
Damn I was effectively ineffective.
Simon my man that last bonus fact had me dying 😂😂
Wow! This was fascinating. Thanks Simon!
I wonder if the agents play "I spy" at these conferences.. to try and spot all the other spies lol
I would say it is probably a given they are. At hacking conventions like DefCon they play "spot the fed"
Very informative and humorous. Thank you!
Plot twist: this was only recommended to you because you have potential as a spy
Loving all your channels simon thank you very much for everyday!
Yes Simon did come up with the facts awful easy and make them all make sense. It does kinda make you wonder if he’s an Mi6 operative or for some other agency. It seemed way to smooth.
My assumption was that secret agents started off as regular government agents and were then recruited internally based on skill and loyalty etc.
Probably some do. But I guess you would more easily move up in the bureaucracy rather than a spy.
It reminds me of a joke. Two government agents are being interviewed for a CIA job. The first is summoned in and told "In the next room is your wife. We have undeniable evidence she has operated as a Russian spy. You have to walk in there. There's a gun on the table. Pick it up and shoot her. The man goes in and meets his wife and sure enough there is a gun on the table. but he can't bring himself to follow the instruction. He comes out in tears saying he couldn't do it. They console him and send him home saying there was no such evidence against his wife but he's just not CIA material. Later they tell the same thing to the next guy. He's a lot longer coming out and looking all disheveled. He grins at their shocked expressions and says, "Sorry, but that gun was not loaded, so I had to strangle her with my necktie that she gave me for Christmas"
Simon really got me with how confident and collected he did that little “hint” 😂😉 dam near 40minute video , he knows to much people !
Rumour Control: Cummings was indeed the inspiration for "M" in the original novels.
However, throughout Bond lore, the Head of the R&D Department/Section was known as "Q", an appellation, abbreviated from Quartermaster, borne of the job title.
Whereas "M" was an initial from the Service's Head own, actual, name.
🤓
Glad someone besides me caught that blunder, with the movies' version being Q and his Q branch combined with the role of Major Boothroyd the armourer.
I was 60% sure Simon worked for MI6 before this video, now I'm 99.9% sure Simon works for MI6! =P
I went to a job fair in Boston's World Trade Center and every three letter agency and some other security ones, like the secret service, were there.
if simon just reads the advertiser points without rambling i’m not buying it 😂
Great episode! Really loved the comical beginnings of MI-6 😂
What I got from this is I'm never getting the invite sitting here in my basement watching CZcams.
A Ball Toner Spray salesmen would be a perfect cover for an operative.
I wonder if Simon's beard is spying on him and is wondering about the Manscaped sponsorship. The beard will make him feel happy and attractive but also ensure that it survives.
For years my older brother told me he could never travel to china because he looked too much like a spy. Turned out, he was a spy. #LOL
That last bit certainly brings new meaning to "dipping your pen in the company ink."
I met a man in late 90s in Central Asia who was certainly living a double life. He was an expatriate around 35, trained as an accountant auditing companies in Russia and various Central Asian countries that left the USSR a few years before. He was fluent in Russian and knew a smattering of the local languages. I taught ESL and he was the honorary Dean of this English-centric College in Tashkent. Most expatriates were fat alcoholics. This guy was in excellent shape. He ran 5 miles a day and was certainly ex-military judging by how he handled himself.
"Is it really being manipulative if we manipulate them well enough that they don't think it's manipulation?"
the story of the beginnings of MI6 is utterly incredible
"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us."...Tada
They already know who are the real sociopaths void of emotion and recruit them.
Simon isn’t even British. He grew up down the street from me in Milwaukee. We got our first job together at the local Greyhound station. He was a star in theatre.
'His inner Marcus Brodey'! Exactly what I was thinking as you said it. Your's was today's first (only) Laugh-out-loud moment of my day. Thanks.
We learned two things from the video. First that Simon would make an excellent MI6 agent if he wasn't so busy making CZcams videos. Second, the purpose of academic conferences is to recruit agents.
I adore that Simon hinted that he was recruited through Keeps of all people
Interesting topic, love the video.
The agency uses the same slow & steady buddy buddy agent recruitment method when evaluating regular military units to fold into JSOC operations as well.
That was quite interesting and informative, Simon. It does remind me to repeat the notion that Sidney Reilly might make for a cracking good Biographics story. He was, after all, the Ace of Spies.
holly shit did you hear that trimmer bog down when simon jammed it up his nose. Guess manscaped wasn't counting on decades of cemented cocaine strata.
You can also break into their computer system and steal a specific file. The file only exists to be stolen, but it proves you are able to get into the most secure computer in the world.
5:05 That's an interesting photo....made to look 30s or 40s noir, but that handgun is anachronistic. It's a Beretta 92 (or some variant), which didn't exist until 1976.
The part in The Interview about “Honeypotting” was pretty funny imo.
Excellent video!
Thank you so kindly for having non-adsense at beginning or end of video, rather than killing flow somewhere between... for that I watch it everytime and consider pursuing, and otherwise would skip out of principle >.>;
Holy hand grenades. This was like a very calm epic blaze. 😆
I had a conversation with an NSA recruiter at a highschool job fair once, when I was 16. He told me that they handled some information the CIA didn't even know. And that they joke that the initialism stands for "No Such Agency."
Sounds about right. Even got an offer, turned it down for better benefits and bonuses in the private sector.
I wonder if they also have an OGA, "Other Government Agency" that nobody can pin down
Some of what Simon talked about sounded like the original Mission Impossible TV show.
Especially the part where recruiters ‘accidentally’ bump into a target so they can, at another gathering, they become friends and the target later gets recruited….
I can tell you exactly how. When I was in school in my final year with a 4.0/4.0 GPA in Electronic Engineering I was called to the Deans office. I asked what is up and all he said was follow me. He took me to a room, opened the door and said agent Richards and Agent Smith (Not there real names) want to talk with you. I found out they were from the FBI and wanted me to do electronic wire tapping of L.A. Gang headquarters. I listen, but turned down the job. The following week the same thing happened and I was led to the same room and 2 men from the CIA were there. They wanted me to go to Turkey to basically listen in on Russian communications and if needed enter Russia on special missions. Again I politely turned this offer down. I don't care if they are monitoring what I do on the Internet. I want people to know the truth about how these agencies recruit people.
My dad was approached by the CIA shortly after he got back from Vietnam but he had already gotten married so they decided he couldn’t do what they wanted him to do. However, he did get a job working on Minuteman ICBMs and has never quite explained how he got that job which isn’t really something that you apply for like a normal job and was no longer in the military.
I've often joked that my BiL was a spy. He got a BoE and worked as a teacher for a couple of years and then went overseas for several years. Of course, he only went to Canada and the USA and was living out of a van the whole time, but it's fun to needle him at family gatherings.
So fact boy is canonically an agent, I’ll accept that
Simon's description of an agent in the first part of the video comes very close to outing himself. Allegedly.
Simon is a spy...
I started a computer forensics degree and they gave us applications on day 2
It all makes sense now. I knew no one could be THAT big of a scardycat!
He said, "Channeling his inner Marcus Brody" 🤣🤣🤣
I‘m sure they are much more high-tech about it now, but, until all records were computerized, Recruiters simply went to public libraries and school libraries with a list of books. They’d look at the card in the little pocket glued into the back of the book, and write down the names of everybody who’d checked that book out in the past few years, and then go on to the next book on the list, If your name appeared on a sufficient number of those check-out cards, some very nice gentlemen with a plain dark sedan would be in your living room drinking iced tea and chatting with your Mom when you got home from school. Then a very interesting conversation would ensue after your Mom was invited, in the most polite way, to make herself scarce. The money offered was somewhat insulting, but that damned dark sedan would still be parked in your driveway from time to time. Persistence and politeness must have worked at least some of the time.
Congrats on 3million !!
every video this guy is in is 90% ads and 10% content
Ooooo you said gentleMAN they are gonna cancel you lolololol awesome vid as always sir
This felt like a video job resume.
Are you trying to telegraph something to us, Si?
After having received a disturbing but incredibly polite anonymous phone call from someone who mispronounced my family name seven times before advising me that I would be much healthier if I retracted the above statement, I therefore retract my previous statement: Simon Whistler is not trying to telegraph anything to anyone about anything, other than perhaps some beard-growing advice, from one of his fantastic sponsors! (Advice I dearly need; I bollocksed my beard with the trimmers last week, after seven months' growth.)
(Also, It's Car-MAA-Zen-Uck)
How he talks about having a social media cover makes it seem like he's a "spy."
This all explains why vice had that really cool like season where that one dude went around the world interviewing some of the craziest people
Link?
Please, or at least name of the video
Well played Simon well played.
I love how Simon keeps low key suggesting he'd make a great spy. 😂Meanwhile, I have zero qualities that would make me a good one. 🙃
So do we think Simon is hinting that he's a spy or just that he wants to be one?🤔
Seems to be hinting that he is
probably his scriptwriter's idea of a joke.
Lol, both. For sure.
If he was a good one, we would never know.
@@stevencarrollscorpio truth. But also, maybe he's hinting at it, so we are a little more careful in the comments.
Or maybe the CIA would like to recruit one of you, but it's trying to be overtly discreet.
An oxymoron, I know, but so is the intelligence community. 😁
Also, I say one of you because I know for a fact those guys aren't interested in recruiting me. They've had the chance to do so and quiet honestly, even with my military background and interest as a younger person, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't consider me at all as nothing more than a security risk to the organization.
And even if they did try to recruit me, I'm pretty certain my answer would be absolutely not.
I made a promise once, to my father so that I could join the USAF, and I don't think they could convince me to break it.