First of all, I want to say that you’re doing a great job. You are capable of paying attention to your own emotions while also focusing on your child's behavior, and you are able to separate the two and explore the needs behind them. This truly shows that you are a mom who is working hard to improve, so I want to commend you for that! This part needs to be discussed by separating the needs of the child and your needs: When your child does something wrong and seeks your embrace, the main reason is that they want to confirm whether you still love them, even when you’re angry. The child has a strong need for emotional connection, which is why they exhibit this behavior. On the other hand, in the moment of the event, you are understandably very angry, and it’s perfectly okay to need some space to calm down and clear your thoughts. I wonder if, through the above analysis, you’ve recognized both of your needs? By directly addressing the needs behind the behavior, you can see that your child needs connection at that moment, while you need space. The best way to connect is through a physical embrace, and hugging doesn’t necessarily mean you’re forgiving them. When you understand this, it becomes easier to first open your heart and hug your child. You can then tell your child, “No matter what you do, Mommy still loves you. But your behavior hurt Mommy. To avoid getting even angrier, Mommy needs to go to the room to calm down. After I’m no longer upset, I’ll come out and find you.”
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很棒的頻道 感謝您❤
哇~~~~您的一句反饋，給我好大的力量喔😍😍😍，加油加油加油，願此頻道能成為媽媽們的充電站🥰🥰🥰
+1 thanks
優秀的您，留到現在❤❤❤
很感動，我們一起加油😘😘😘
Hi, my son want me to hug him every time he do wrong thing and I am still under angry mode. What can I do?
First of all, I want to say that you’re doing a great job. You are capable of paying attention to your own emotions while also focusing on your child's behavior, and you are able to separate the two and explore the needs behind them. This truly shows that you are a mom who is working hard to improve, so I want to commend you for that!
This part needs to be discussed by separating the needs of the child and your needs:
When your child does something wrong and seeks your embrace, the main reason is that they want to confirm whether you still love them, even when you’re angry. The child has a strong need for emotional connection, which is why they exhibit this behavior.
On the other hand, in the moment of the event, you are understandably very angry, and it’s perfectly okay to need some space to calm down and clear your thoughts.
I wonder if, through the above analysis, you’ve recognized both of your needs? By directly addressing the needs behind the behavior, you can see that your child needs connection at that moment, while you need space. The best way to connect is through a physical embrace, and hugging doesn’t necessarily mean you’re forgiving them. When you understand this, it becomes easier to first open your heart and hug your child. You can then tell your child, “No matter what you do, Mommy still loves you. But your behavior hurt Mommy. To avoid getting even angrier, Mommy needs to go to the room to calm down. After I’m no longer upset, I’ll come out and find you.”
+1
為優秀的媽媽點讚👍👍👍
+1
為同為優秀、用心又有愛的媽媽點讚，我們一起加油😍
+1
讚嘆同為優秀的媽媽😍😍🥰🥰
+1
為優秀的您點讚😍