I grew up with a very cold father. To this day Ive never been in a long term relationship. Its not that Im not open, or loving, or feminine, but I do feel theres something missing that would explain why Im always overlooked. People who have loving parents have no idea how much their parents have set them up for success beyond just health, education, stability.
same I am feminine loving and fun to my friends just that I cannot move in with someone and take the forever road. we change we need a partner for every decade of our lives. and also ppl are not what they seem to be when you first start dating. Living alone is the best thing ever though having a similar minded partner might be double the fun. dont think that living in the same house works that well though :)
Ayo. Tell it aloud. My father left us when i was six and that still reflects in my relationships. I was never able to trust another human. Abandonment issues, doubts. Kids raised in a safe environment will always have an advantage over us who faced insecurities in childhood.
@@ta4256 hugs I am sorry you had to go trough all of it. Solitude can be so painful sometimes but for me living alone has been the best thing because human interactions can be so hurtful sometimes or just overwhelming so being alone is soothing. My parents made me feel so unwanted and unlovable but my grandparents were great and nice. I grew up to be an anxious adult but I am keeping that in check most days. I dont feel like I should be having kids in the fear that Id be a bad parent or that theyd grow up to have some of my parents traits. Hope your life isnt hurting you that much anymore.
When he mentioned that how a male internalizes his mother's attributes to what he desires in a woman - struck a chord with me because one day my husband said to me..." Our son is so lucky, I wish I had a mother like you". I am a widow now, but I see via this interview why he said that. That's Beautiful !
@@Dreday_2k7 Single parent epidemic. It’s nearly impossible to meet a childless man. I started dating younger men thinking it would help but they have children too. 🤦🏾♀️
Yup, and unfortunately for tens of millions of us don't have that privilege to experience such a great thing. I'm 21 but had to grow up, mature way quicker than 99% of my peers in school. I've been at terms that I'll never have a father, and my mother is still troubled with herself. But I still have a deep rooted yearning to have a father, even though I've never had a father in my life.
Lewis is a fascinating interviewer. He asks a lot of questions that are somewhat "unsophisticated" on the surface, but over the course of the interview it encourages Robert to develop and fully explain his ideas in a very clear way. It's almost as if he's teaching Lewis, as opposed to being interviewed by Lewis. Very different from most interviewers on CZcams, who seem to want to one-up their interviewees.
@@lewishowes I agree. I appreciate that as well. 🙌🏻 Showing curiosity and a desire to understand makes a great interview. Listening well is a lost art. In addition, I have felt very frustrated as a listener when the interviewer asks an interesting question, the interviewee begins to answer and just as the guest begins to get to the meat of their answer, the interviewer interrupts with an interpretive comment or talks over the guest in some way without allowing the person being interviewed to complete their thought. Gayle King did this once while interviewing Lady Gaga and it turned me off to Ms. King permanently. The audience never did get to hear Lady Gaga’s thoughts on one of the more interesting questions she was asked during that interview. Be a “hollow bone”, Lewis. It will always stand you in good stead.
I have no desire to be married, I never have for as long as I can remember. I watched my parents argue almost everyday and when I moved out at 18 yrs. old I remember the peace I felt bec. of the quietness! I do love companionship. I have male and female friends. I love coming home from work to a quiet home of peace! I enjoy going out , traveling, doing what I want to do when I get ready.
We subconsciously want to relive our childhood traumas through the people we pick for relationships so we have more chances to correct it. If we don’t figure out the lesson then we’ll just keep reliving the same situation through multiple relationships. Once you learn what you were meant to learn, that issue will magically disappear from your life forever.
I’ve watched so many Robert Green interviews because I find his ideas fascinating, but damn you’re a great interviewer!! You ask all the right questions. It’s awesome 👏🏻
I agree. I can’t stand interviewers who just want to hear themselves talk and won’t let their guest talk or who keep interrupting and throwing the whole thing off
Are you associating this person with the divine .he just might be false .some energy's don't need to follow other people's advice.No where dose this person bring awareness to free will.
“Do what you did in the beginning of the relationship, and there won’t be an end.” Tony Robbins Great panel discussion! Love Robert Greene! I soak up his material. I feel when I step out into the world it gives me an edge. I could listen to him all day. I’d love to see him and Dr. Jordan Peterson together on a platform. I think my brain might explode! Lol Great stuff! 🙏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻💪🏻😍
Indeed. "Do what you did in the beginning of the relationship, and there won’t be an end." Still after 1,5 month or 8 months tops most people forget about this advice and then act surprised that things turn sour.
There is now a video of them both; Robert and Jordan. Jordan interviewed him and published the nearly 2hrs long video on his youtube challenge about a day ago.
I did all this- as the female. I was the one doing all the work, doing for them, asking and understanding and working hard, being every thing they said they wanted. They gave me crumbs in return- when they thought I was leaving. They came to me for parenting and once they felt better about themselves- they didn’t just leave- they destroyed.
Falling in love doesn't happen anymore because we've become so self absorbed through social media that we realize that meeting each other on a deep/soul level isn't necessary for us to get what we want. I've never met a set of individuals more miserably loving together than I have this generation and my generation as well. I'm turning 40 this year. Everyone I know, including my parents are absolutely miserable with each other. The "settling" that's taking place is out of control. I have yet to hear someone tell me that they're connecting with someone on a deep level. All I get now is either, "I don't know why...this" or "I've been married to your stepmom now for 30 years so what's the point in divorcing now" or "I just met so and so and they just wanna f***" or "I regret leaving my last relationship, but I plan to get married to this person this summer." I mean, it's so incredibly bizarre...lol. I, myself, fell deeply in love with a friend and I was rejected. I was told it was because sometimes a person doesn't know what to do with the kind of love you're trying to give them. Especially if it's genuine and you're not asking for anything in return. You're teaching them it's okay for them to take what you're offering without them having to give back. It hurt me greatly. It made me misunderstand love completely. Here I was just trying to love someone and by doing that lost them altogether. She ended up marrying someone she cheated on her previous relationship with and is now pregnant. Being disappointed in that entire situation doesn't begin to explain it for me. But that's life ya know? It taught me a lot about love and myself...I have to completely reorganize my thought patterns and delve deep in my own stuff so I can learn not to repeat those apparent mistakes from my past that always end up getting me hurt. That and I'm not searching for love. I'm focusing on myself and that's it.
There is nothing wrong with you. Her past showed her for the person she actually is. Remember what Robert said, if a person shows you what they are. Then believe them the first time. Since the behavioral pattern will definitely be repeated. That is what the person is. Your a man, and men fall in love with women for their looks and sexual response to them If you are what you described yourself to be to this woman and she rejected you. Then count yourself blessed that you did not invest in her long term. Many people are inherently broken and nothing, not even the very best efforts will change them
23:15 it's just about feeling that you actually matter to someone, that they value you. And if you genuinely value someone surely is natural to let them know that. It's not about grand gestures or expensive gifts. It's just the look in your eyes, the spark of ideas off each other as you engage in conversation. It's about connection. If there's no connection any more, there's no relationship is there. You can't have a relationship on auto pilot
How does one avoid autopilot? You say it’s not about gestures or gifts and only connection. Don’t those ‘surprises’ (usually gestures or gifts) help avoid slipping into auto-pilot? I also don’t see how someone is to have a long-term relationship without occasionally slipping into autopilot. Nobody is perfect. Maybe you can enlighten me here.
@@RacksonRacksonRibss You're right, nobody's perfect. That's why we all have tendencies to fall into bad habits and forget what matters to us. We all need to just take time out throughout the day to recognise the good things we have and let people know we love and value them. Like all the best things.... it's really easy but really difficult at the same time 🤦🏻♀️ We're very easily distracted by all the stuff that's demanding our attention. I'm not perfect, I forget too. It's like that old saying, we don't know what we've got until it's gone. So to keep it, make a point of noticing it while it's happening and show love and gratitude for what and who you have on a daily basis. It doesn't have to be big gestures. Just a touch or a smile can make the difference to someone's day x
Yes constructive criticism is the key in life but delivering it gracefully is the key!! In my experience as a sales person and nurse , your energy is the most important tool you can use to encourage patients to change their perspective!! So true you have to promote faith and courage!! It can change someone’s attitude on living , I promise!! Its so magical to talk someone into still fighting cancer!! If you tell them they are gonna win they will !! Psychology of the mind!!
Yes, anyone can do nice things for the wrong reasons. Why do they do what they do? In the end, that is what makes the difference. What do they value above all else? What code do they live by? Because if it’s a self-centered code, the nice things will end the moment you stop giving them everything they want
@@QuidamByMoonlight You nailed my ex on the head. Did all the nice things, just to use them against you later, brag about to other people and to maintain a "im an innocent nice girl" . The moment things went sideways, i saw nothing but pure evil trying to destroy my self esteem and confidence on all levels. Physical, mental, emotional, financial.
A better one is judge them on their character/actions instead of what they say. It’s why I’ve always hated interviewers/hiring managers, they hire the best bullshitters and they just so happen to make the worst employees. They’re great at trying to brown nose me but don’t do anything to actually work hard.
I settled for too less, abusive men due to childhood self worth issues, I felt that was normal to find unavailable men for whom you have to work hard to get love in return,,, but when I healed my inner child, I started saying no to anything less than amazing, not even the bare minimum. I know now that every human deserves love & care without doing hard work
So true when he talks about fulfilling the missing need of the other person. If you're attentive and can make the other person comfortable, people have a natural propensity to talk and reveal much about themselves and will tell you exactly what's missing from their life. This applies in every human interaction whether it be romantic or professional.
Yes society screams it from the rooftops. I think it’s one of the biggest lies that society tells us. I’m not saying it’s not true for some people or heck maybe even most people. Some of us are OK with not being in a relationship. Some of us are better off not being in a relationship. And those who believe what society is telling them Just cannot seem to believe that a person who doesn’t wanna be in a relationship can be happy
I didn't have a healthy childhood or involved parents. I idealized my dad, even though we spent very little time together as a child after my parents divorced. My mother was not nurturing. My husband had a pretty good childhood. I feel lucky that he chose me, and we ended up being a good match. I think the success of our relationship has a lot to do with being young and inexperienced when we first got together. Neither of us had much baggage. More people should focus their effort on their young love. It seems easier to grow together and become the best version of yourself that is compatible with your partner, than it is to find someone that meets all of your expectations later on.
I feel if someone had a bad childhood, as long as their spirit is open to be a better person and is willing to learn, they can still find success in someone, but they have to choose a good partner and not a toxic one... these kind of ppl choose the toxic ones too often and are blind to the nurturing ones
I only find someone attractive once I've seen what they're like as a person from talking to them. Once I am attracted to them as a person I start to see them as attractive. They might have been physically attractive all along but I would never have even noticed until I realised how much I admire their character, their attitude, their ethos. Then i actually start seeing them for the first time. They transform in front of my eyes. It's only ever happened twice and it's a magical, unforgettable experience ♥️ I'm certainly not ever sexually attracted to someone until I feel love for them!
I think that's called being demi-sexual. I'm also like that. I know when someone would be attractive in the eyes of society, but I only feel personally attracted after I get to know someone and spend some time getting familiar with how they are.
@@shaimaadoma that's the new term for it i believe I just call it being normal, before certain members of society started trying to convince everyone else that being hypsersexualised was normal 🙄
I love Robert Greene. I cannot stop listening to all his interviews. I’ve only just discovered him at 58 years old but I have now bought all his books and cannot put them down……I had a happy happy childhood with happy loving parents and I was a wonderful loving Mother to my son and so was my son’s Father. Now all of my sons school friends tell me that they wished they had a Mum like me because their Mums never gave them the love or time when they were young and in my sons year at school. Robert Greene is my hero….thank you ❤❤❤❤
Lewis, you always acknowledge your guest for their interview and for sharing something good into the world, so I want to acknowledge you for being such a great interviewer I really can see how passionate you are during the interview and how you actually listen to your guests and not only wait until you can talk. Hopefully I can learn this from you. Espero que tengas un buen día!!! Besos desde España 🥰
After years and decades of being in other people’s “movies”, aka lives, their choices, their decisions, etc , I can finally be the star, director and producer of my own. One of the things I think that holds us back, at least what I found, was the imposter syndrome. I was doing, buying, making, etc in more of a robotic way because I felt I could fit in, get other’s approval, make others happy. But no matter how hard I tried, or how long or how much, I still ended up with a feeling of not enough. So, I changed my movie. I made me the star. Not in a vain or bad selfish way but healthy for me, setting boundaries. Then if others wanted to be in my “movie” ( aka life), they were welcome as long as they agreed it was my movie
Two wonderful and talented men coming together to make the world a more special place. Their kindness, patience,understanding and lack of overbearing ego is well noted. Their life partners are lucky ladies.👍❤
1:00:59 and here shows how intuitive Lewis is to make sure his guest feels loved, important, and worthy, by understanding his deepest fears, lifting him up with praise and acknowledging how much good he has done with his work. @Lewis, you rock, and your intuitive sensitiveness keep me coming to your interviews, your words and questions are always on good timing.
Robert- what a calming, wise presence. Esther, I hang on every word you say. There were several times where I paused and replayed, needing to hear it again. Both of you have given me more insight into the world of partnership that I find really confusing. All made possible by Lewis. Thanks to all of you. 🙏
I have to say that Robert Greene talks about things that I’ve never heard expressed before in the mindset field. I’m getting so much value from this interview. 🧡
Man. Thanks for that acknowledgment at the end of Robert's interview. In a sense, you were thanking him on behalf of many of us seeing, who owe so much to Robert and wish could be able to thank him as well.
Robert Greene is a genius. He makes not just strategy and machiavellism something that common people can understand, from a point of view at it was and is a natural part of our evolution as a higher primate. But he also writes about narcissism egotism and that we need more empathy to understand others and our self to become more sofisticated and human. That is he breaks down both extremes of narcissism on one hand and empathy on the other, but without saying " be mr nice guy and it`s all gonna be fine". He is such a brilliant writer, and it`s also nice to see that he lives in the modern world and goes on youtube and also talk to real life influencers like Jordan Belfort or Mikaela Peterson. That is he acutaly makes the writing more real to us readers. And as other has pointed out you are a brilliant intervjuer Lewis and listener!. Keep up the good work
I have Found Love and It's Not in another Person , and Is including My Relationship with the One Who made Me . I AM aware of what I AM OPEN to and will not ACCEPT what I AM Unaligned with , in The Kingdom.
I had one long term relationship (~6years) in my 20s that did what Greene was talking about a series of bad relationships can do. What made me leave was the fact that what I was going through in the relationship was turning me into my dad. Then earlier this year I watched all the star wars movies earlier this year and it hit me so hard. It also pushed me towards dealing with my childhood traumas so that I don't pass them onto my future kids.
Yes Star Wars is fundamentally about George Lucas relationship with his Father. ( it all in there ) So much sooo that he sold the Franchise to be able to raise his daughter/ ( and not repeat the pattern )!
We all turn into our mom and dad’s eventually. It’s not that big a deal unless they were horrible to you. If they were be conscious of it and don’t turn into that part
You may not know the person but your psychology and energy recognises similar patterns. That's an evolutionary measure. Even in short introductory conversations the subconscious mind recognises what is familiar. Studies also show people often (but not always) fall for people who have face similarities to what they recognise. This may be their own face or a caregiver from childhood. As another commenter said in relationships often partners are trying to repeat and resolve past issues (almost entirely unconsciously). Unfortunately this is where projection occurs because in this the whole person is not seen, only the familiar patterns and the familiar outcomes from those patterns. So we don't fall in love so much as fall into old programmes. This is why people feel like they are dating the same person over and over again.
I disagree, it's the spirit of two people that connect at first meeting its not to do with the physical, it's so much deeper and has happened to me. Infact you have to connect on that deep unexplained level for a relationship to last.
I think love at first sight is possible in so far as you imidiatly see a projection of an energy that is inside yourself that you were already in love with.
This interview is so natural that it seems almost like a regular conversation. It's hard to pause because the conversation is so organic. It's not natural for a person to do it that naturally. There must've been a huge amount of effort for making that great listening&asking attitude, I guess. Admire you, Lewis.
Thank you both for sharing. I believe in self awareness and self acceptance before you can move on and love and accept someone else. Lewis you are asking such real and genuine questions and Robert is answering them from the heart. 🙏
I love Robert Greene so much… he is truly a treasure. His books are fascinating and have a deep almost gothic feeling to them which really resonates with me. I’ve learned so much from him!
Lewis, you are an amazing interviewer. What I truly admire about you is the fact that in spite of being so aware and having so much of knowledge, you never come across arrogant like, yeah, am aware of that. In fact you do the exact opposite. You make the interviewee feel like they are giving you a complete new information again and again, like you are hearing and understanding it for the first time. You show so much of interest and are willing to listen to similar information with open perspective all the time. Definitely the best interviewer ever. I have so much to learn from you.
The song, "what's love got to do with it?" Tina Turner, Comes to mind here. I've met a lot of men who don't actually want a relationship, yet they do want sex. They don't always tell you that either. Real relationships take time to build, many just assume that finding love is easy, and often our culture tells us that it doesn't take work period. When we build something we have to plan it out together and have both parties work toward the outcome.
Trust me, modern younger women are the new “men” lol, and embody that problem perfectly. They all “just want to have fun”, no responsibility or accountability. Forming long term relationships with them is like trying to raise a daughter/child to behave correctly
I am fully aware, as many have decided to act like a lot of guys do... This look doesn't look good on anyone either! What's worse is that many a young woman saw this when it happened to their Moms, aunties, or older sisters, and now they think it's alright! Their now the jerks.... The pendulum has now swung the other way, and damn it all it still doesn't work! In the end it doesn't matter who does what if you're going to act like a s*** then don't get upset when you're treated like one!
In SOuth Korean culture, there is a widely known dating rule- espcially when trying to find your life long soulmate, you must "seduce" the other partner- but not in a calculating way- but to make yourself elusive- or "not to easy to get" type of a person, such that the significant other has to "work" to earn your trust and to win you over. In western culture, seduction is known mainly for getting them in bed, but in south KOrean culture, it's considered and comes from more of an innocent motive. EVen if you see the other person "working you", you assume the best of that person and play along with them- to put yourself in that person's shoe and be flattered.. and fantasize about him or her while waiting to see them on the next date when tonight's date must be cut short. To be honest, I think it's the only way to date and eventually find your love. Because I grew up in that environment, I could never force myself to be in a hurry to be in bed with someone as I could never feel sexually be attracted unless I am "seduced" where I have this emotional bond with the partner. ANyway, what a great interview- all of my life, I have felt it was due to cultural difference that I will never be able to find anyone in the western culture who would understand this way of thinking and dating. So yes, I whole heartedly agree, love requires an art of seduction.(BTW, it's not so much about seduction than, say to "don't let your partner get too comfortable with you too fast, such that he takes you for granted and there is no effort in the relationship to keep eachother excited and on his toes).
Yes but Korea is a conservative culture. The U.S. is a liberal culture. We don't have dating customs or even solid gender identity, roles or a common felicity. In many respects men and women are separate sociopolitical and socioeconomic classes and are viewed as such. Often, when a politician uses the word "families" you realize they are talking about single women's families. It is such that during the 08 recession the women's council had the stimulus directed away from men's families and toward women's. In essence, we don't have any basic level of societal cohesion pretty much post cultural revolution onward.
Western culture is skipping everything to sex, may be that is why people couldn't find love any more, many children not growing with two parents. Everything is a dopamine rush, impulsive and once drop from the high then the desire die, it feels mostly dopamine rush and more and more people are becoming single. It will be interesting to see where and how this affect the community in few decades. It could be bad or good yet it is defiantly changing family, children upbringing, community and all.
This is the same in India. It's probably because Eastern cultures valued strong familial ties, mainly outside of a religious context like Mr. Robert mentions. Men and women had traditional roles but they were complementary and balancing to themselves and to society as a whole.
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This women is the most intellectual woman we have today. The wey she answer the question simple but deep soft but so strong easy but so meaningful I can’t have enough of. Interviews like this
I met a woman a month ago and we connected so much as far as hobbies, what we like and don’t like. It was an otherworldly experience for me. I’ve never been in a relationship before and I get super nervous around women. Because I’m a dummy she doesn’t want to talk to me anymore. I have much to learn. Thanks for the interview, the knowledge and wisdom!
I struggle, I get ghosted all the time, I'm certainly not a bad looking dude, but I have asperger syndrome, albeit very mildly, but my main concern is I don't know where to meet women.
@@aaronfitzgerald9109 Have look at Coach Corey Wayne his advice will put you completely on the right track. His CZcams channel is here czcams.com/video/aS3oxcTk-9Q/video.html
We are so focused on self and defying living according to our biology. We have instant gratification and yet, we are more miserable than ever. We constantly have to prove we are just as good or better than, rather than being just as good or better.
The current social external pressure is to question what sex you are… this is very singular. Society has now forced single life as much as previous social forces pressured people to not be single.
@@thatguy6207 yeah i agree pushing people not to be single is silly but pushing people to be single is even more silly, and also how long before the human race dies out? lol
This is so beautiful, I love this. I think the only thing missing because it's out of scope of the framework is the realisation that with awakening or freedom from identifying as the personality then complete freedom in relationship occurs. This is total love of yourself and consequently love of other too ! Until then everything is a kind of therapy and healing. There will still be healing and playing out even then but with light shone on it, it will be super quick. The other point is as long as you hold to the other giving you something there has to be fear. When you absolutely know you are complete and need nothing then the relationship is a gift of love !! Anyway very beautiful video, thank you xxx
My dad was too busy with his business and we lived in different countries. I felt I grew up in a single family while my mom has always been very strict to us - I felt I could only stay at home/ with them if I’m a good daughter in their eyes / benchmark. I really want a good family for myself, and grow old with my man. Now I need to solve my issue not able to staying in a long term relationship, avoid blaming the parenting issue. I’m not going to blame my parents because they’ve their own problems and karma.
Watching this Robert talk about vulnerability, I realise I as an INFJ have a natural advantage when it comes to seduction. I know no other way than to be very emotionally open and vulnerable with others, and also to allow them to open their inner world to me without fear of judgement.
Wow! Thank you so much for being such a great interviewer. You’re amazing at pulling out the gems from the people you interview that are pertinent and relatable to all of us.
I grew up with a cold father and find that I'm attracted to individuals who don't display a lot of emotion. I found the perfect combination by entering a long-term relationship with an individual who has aspergers. The love and commitment is there with a gorgeous, genius but I have a lot of space.
Lewis man, thank you so much for putting yourself on the line each time and putting great care to ask questions that hit smack at the center of things. You can't imagine how much your work gives extraordinary help. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!
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I don't believe in looking for love, love will find you when your ready to give and receive love. But until then I'll continue to be very happy being single. And remain open and ready for the right connection.
If you dont have the desire to make an effort to be in a relationship and you are so happy being single. There is no reason whatsoever to suggest that you're going to be in longterm romantic relationship.
Women have a very short window before their options expire, I wouldn’t advise waiting too long. Careers and traveling are fun but at the end of the day nothing beats having a family to come home to. There’s a reason single ppl die earlier :/
Funnily enough - during the Errol Flynn reference this so reminded me of what qualities we look for when rearing and handling stallions (horse) is true for picking seductive men…someone who is secure in themselves and make you feel a sense of calm (as a woman). The same is seen in nature - which means you do know what you’re looking for when you look for your future partner, you just have to hold the standard and wait for the right “feeling” 😌
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Preach Robert!!!!! Connection on a spiritual level beyond surface Level!!!! Yasssss 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 say it louder for the ppl in the back 🗣 I’m so over superficial surface level connections 😔
I don’t think that it is sexual attraction with mother or father, I think you look for your mother or father’s qualities in the partner because this is what you know how to deal with, anything else other than that makes you feel scared of the unknown so you look for familiar to be comfortable in the relationship. It is like formed ego and without it you are lost, so people are not able to get rid of it even though that brings them pain but at least they know how to deal with it instead of living spontaneously in unknown. I
I kind of touched on this idea a little while ago, I started thinking that people have all these problems for not matching their own ideals and understanding the things the want. The things we want reflect that onto ourselves in the form of insecurities.
I grew up with a very cold father. To this day Ive never been in a long term relationship. Its not that Im not open, or loving, or feminine, but I do feel theres something missing that would explain why Im always overlooked. People who have loving parents have no idea how much their parents have set them up for success beyond just health, education, stability.
same I am feminine loving and fun to my friends just that I cannot move in with someone and take the forever road. we change we need a partner for every decade of our lives. and also ppl are not what they seem to be when you first start dating. Living alone is the best thing ever though having a similar minded partner might be double the fun. dont think that living in the same house works that well though :)
Ayo. Tell it aloud. My father left us when i was six and that still reflects in my relationships. I was never able to trust another human. Abandonment issues, doubts. Kids raised in a safe environment will always have an advantage over us who faced insecurities in childhood.
@@ta4256 hugs I am sorry you had to go trough all of it. Solitude can be so painful sometimes but for me living alone has been the best thing because human interactions can be so hurtful sometimes or just overwhelming so being alone is soothing. My parents made me feel so unwanted and unlovable but my grandparents were great and nice. I grew up to be an anxious adult but I am keeping that in check most days. I dont feel like I should be having kids in the fear that Id be a bad parent or that theyd grow up to have some of my parents traits. Hope your life isnt hurting you that much anymore.
@@elise9537 same with me. I prefer to be alone and live alone mostly. But i do wish if i could find someone who gave me that safe place.
@@elise9537 🤗❤️
When he mentioned that how a male internalizes his mother's attributes to what he desires in a woman - struck a chord with me because one day my husband said to me..." Our son is so lucky, I wish I had a mother like you". I am a widow now, but I see via this interview why he said that. That's Beautiful !
Aww i wish you everything best in life. May your husband's soul rest in peace.
How lucky you were to have a husband who appreciated the woman you are, you will find that again because you are that woman that men crave.
@@maybee...
May Bee thank you so much for your response
Rrrr rr rr rr 4e
That beautiful Leona. Makes me think of my own son. May your husband Rest In Peace
Most people wont let themselves be vulnerable anymore
And for a very damn good reason...
I venture to say that most people wish they could be vulnerable. It’s a jungle out here.
The dating landscape is sh*t. Being a single male at 38, I've noticed there's a single mother epidemic.
@@Dreday_2k7 Single parent epidemic. It’s nearly impossible to meet a childless man. I started dating younger men thinking it would help but they have children too. 🤦🏾♀️
@@prettyawesomejm , you are correct.
Most don’t know what love is in the first place because it was never experienced in the arms of their mother and father.
The biggest privilege in life, bigger than being wealthy or anything else is having loving parents.
🧡
Agreeed
Yeah !
That’s something I didn’t realize till now
Yup, and unfortunately for tens of millions of us don't have that privilege to experience such a great thing. I'm 21 but had to grow up, mature way quicker than 99% of my peers in school. I've been at terms that I'll never have a father, and my mother is still troubled with herself. But I still have a deep rooted yearning to have a father, even though I've never had a father in my life.
Please don't have kids till you heal please. Childhood is the most important part, you either raise a healthy humans or broken humans. Heal first!!!
I'm too old to have children. But Thank you.
Lewis is a fascinating interviewer. He asks a lot of questions that are somewhat "unsophisticated" on the surface, but over the course of the interview it encourages Robert to develop and fully explain his ideas in a very clear way. It's almost as if he's teaching Lewis, as opposed to being interviewed by Lewis. Very different from most interviewers on CZcams, who seem to want to one-up their interviewees.
Thank you so much! Your comment made my day 😊
@@lewishowes I agree. I appreciate that as well. 🙌🏻 Showing curiosity and a desire to understand makes a great interview. Listening well is a lost art.
In addition, I have felt very frustrated as a listener when the interviewer asks an interesting question, the interviewee begins to answer and just as the guest begins to get to the meat of their answer, the interviewer interrupts with an interpretive comment or talks over the guest in some way without allowing the person being interviewed to complete their thought. Gayle King did this once while interviewing Lady Gaga and it turned me off to Ms. King permanently. The audience never did get to hear Lady Gaga’s thoughts on one of the more interesting questions she was asked during that interview.
Be a “hollow bone”, Lewis. It will always stand you in good stead.
I agree. Lewis is a very humble interviewer.
A great interviewer is curious with no preconceived notions or opinions of the topic. He has this quality
Agree great listener
It opens up the person being interviewed so much more and he also shows he respects and has previously researched the topic
I have no desire to be married, I never have for as long as I can remember. I watched my parents argue almost everyday and when I moved out at 18 yrs. old I remember the peace I felt bec. of the quietness! I do love companionship. I have male and female friends. I love coming home from work to a quiet home of peace! I enjoy going out , traveling, doing what I want to do when I get ready.
Same here !
It's incredible the impact parents make on the future relationships of their children.
I concur with you.
Same. I will never get married no matter how much I love someone.
We subconsciously want to relive our childhood traumas through the people we pick for relationships so we have more chances to correct it. If we don’t figure out the lesson then we’ll just keep reliving the same situation through multiple relationships. Once you learn what you were meant to learn, that issue will magically disappear from your life forever.
this is very true and powerful
That actually makes a lot of sense. Thank you! 🙏
Talk about magical thinking!
Very well said and true!
what lesson to figure out, can you elaborate further please
I’ve watched so many Robert Green interviews because I find his ideas fascinating, but damn you’re a great interviewer!! You ask all the right questions. It’s awesome 👏🏻
I agree. I can’t stand interviewers who just want to hear themselves talk and won’t let their guest talk or who keep interrupting and throwing the whole thing off
i agree. Lewis asks good questions & actually listens to the responses.
Agreed!
Robert Greene is a complete genius can have every woman he wants .. you re not my friend Keep dreaming
Seriously I was thinking the same. He was literally coming up with the questions I want to ask
love at first sight = falling in love with a person’s energy right away when you interact
Maybe seeing a projection of some energy inside yourself that you were already in love with would be a better explanation.
@@andredelacerdasantos4439 i agree and i think it can be a beautiful feeling
Absolutely!
That only happens when you are a teenager
It’s more lust.
The process of self awareness is seeking truth, forgiveness and growth. Robert, is such a divine soul.
Are you associating this person with the divine .he just might be false .some energy's don't need to follow other people's advice.No where dose this person bring awareness to free will.
@@anndillard8681 yep he is on the strange side... but he is pretty observant.would you date him ?:)
“Do what you did in the beginning of the relationship, and there won’t be an end.” Tony Robbins
Great panel discussion! Love Robert Greene! I soak up his material. I feel when I step out into the world it gives me an edge. I could listen to him all day. I’d love to see him and Dr. Jordan Peterson together on a platform. I think my brain might explode! Lol Great stuff! 🙏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻💪🏻😍
Indeed. "Do what you did in the beginning of the relationship, and there won’t be an end." Still after 1,5 month or 8 months tops most people forget about this advice and then act surprised that things turn sour.
There is now a video of them both; Robert and Jordan. Jordan interviewed him and published the nearly 2hrs long video on his youtube challenge about a day ago.
It has happened
There is an interview between Greene and Peterson. Watch it
But you can’t. You just can’t. Now you guys know each other very well.
I did all this- as the female. I was the one doing all the work, doing for them, asking and understanding and working hard, being every thing they said they wanted. They gave me crumbs in return- when they thought I was leaving. They came to me for parenting and once they felt better about themselves- they didn’t just leave- they destroyed.
I guess you learned a lesson.
Sorry you experienced this.
"Generosity in a relationship is really important." -- Boom!! so so so true!!!
Typical woman with her hand out lol.
@@reddragon4482 hehehe ... lol
Absolutely 💯. Such a good reminder
That is very true! This is one of the first details that we look at.
Can you explain it please
Falling in love doesn't happen anymore because we've become so self absorbed through social media that we realize that meeting each other on a deep/soul level isn't necessary for us to get what we want. I've never met a set of individuals more miserably loving together than I have this generation and my generation as well. I'm turning 40 this year.
Everyone I know, including my parents are absolutely miserable with each other. The "settling" that's taking place is out of control. I have yet to hear someone tell me that they're connecting with someone on a deep level. All I get now is either, "I don't know why...this" or "I've been married to your stepmom now for 30 years so what's the point in divorcing now" or "I just met so and so and they just wanna f***" or "I regret leaving my last relationship, but I plan to get married to this person this summer." I mean, it's so incredibly bizarre...lol.
I, myself, fell deeply in love with a friend and I was rejected. I was told it was because sometimes a person doesn't know what to do with the kind of love you're trying to give them. Especially if it's genuine and you're not asking for anything in return. You're teaching them it's okay for them to take what you're offering without them having to give back. It hurt me greatly. It made me misunderstand love completely. Here I was just trying to love someone and by doing that lost them altogether. She ended up marrying someone she cheated on her previous relationship with and is now pregnant. Being disappointed in that entire situation doesn't begin to explain it for me. But that's life ya know? It taught me a lot about love and myself...I have to completely reorganize my thought patterns and delve deep in my own stuff so I can learn not to repeat those apparent mistakes from my past that always end up getting me hurt. That and I'm not searching for love. I'm focusing on myself and that's it.
It is capitalism that is doing us in
There is nothing wrong with you. Her past showed her for the person she actually is. Remember what Robert said, if a person shows you what they are. Then believe them the first time. Since the behavioral pattern will definitely be repeated. That is what the person is.
Your a man, and men fall in love with women for their looks and sexual response to them
If you are what you described yourself to be to this woman and she rejected you. Then count yourself blessed that you did not invest in her long term.
Many people are inherently broken and nothing, not even the very best efforts will change them
@@BUBBLESPOGO honest self inquiry can change anyone.
Were you in love with my ex gf? Is nothing I've experienced unique
The exchange between the two of you is very interesting, isn't it? You are very helpful
23:15 it's just about feeling that you actually matter to someone, that they value you.
And if you genuinely value someone surely is natural to let them know that.
It's not about grand gestures or expensive gifts.
It's just the look in your eyes, the spark of ideas off each other as you engage in conversation.
It's about connection.
If there's no connection any more, there's no relationship is there.
You can't have a relationship on auto pilot
How does one avoid autopilot?
You say it’s not about gestures or gifts and only connection.
Don’t those ‘surprises’ (usually gestures or gifts) help avoid slipping into auto-pilot?
I also don’t see how someone is to have a long-term relationship without occasionally slipping into autopilot. Nobody is perfect. Maybe you can enlighten me here.
@@RacksonRacksonRibss
You're right, nobody's perfect.
That's why we all have tendencies to fall into bad habits and forget what matters to us.
We all need to just take time out throughout the day to recognise the good things we have and let people know we love and value them.
Like all the best things.... it's really easy but really difficult at the same time 🤦🏻♀️
We're very easily distracted by all the stuff that's demanding our attention.
I'm not perfect, I forget too.
It's like that old saying, we don't know what we've got until it's gone.
So to keep it, make a point of noticing it while it's happening and show love and gratitude for what and who you have on a daily basis. It doesn't have to be big gestures. Just a touch or a smile can make the difference to someone's day x
@@ellie698or a heart emoji lol asking alot I know
Yes constructive criticism is the key in life but delivering it gracefully is the key!! In my experience as a sales person and nurse , your energy is the most important tool you can use to encourage patients to change their perspective!! So true you have to promote faith and courage!! It can change someone’s attitude on living , I promise!! Its so magical to talk someone into still fighting cancer!! If you tell them they are gonna win they will !! Psychology of the mind!!
Interesting comment 🤔
I Also am a Nurse and have been so 23 years ! I Adore my patients and my patients adore me!
Your an awesome person I wish we had nurses here like you .
With cancer, what is it to fight and what is it to give up?
he said you can't fall in love without the seduction process, still wrapping my head around that one 🤔
Yes this is something I've learnt just last month 'learn to judge people based on their character not the nice things they do.'
Ooh ,that's good!
What do you mean by that?
Yes, anyone can do nice things for the wrong reasons. Why do they do what they do? In the end, that is what makes the difference. What do they value above all else? What code do they live by? Because if it’s a self-centered code, the nice things will end the moment you stop giving them everything they want
@@QuidamByMoonlight You nailed my ex on the head. Did all the nice things, just to use them against you later, brag about to other people and to maintain a "im an innocent nice girl" . The moment things went sideways, i saw nothing but pure evil trying to destroy my self esteem and confidence on all levels. Physical, mental, emotional, financial.
A better one is judge them on their character/actions instead of what they say. It’s why I’ve always hated interviewers/hiring managers, they hire the best bullshitters and they just so happen to make the worst employees. They’re great at trying to brown nose me but don’t do anything to actually work hard.
I hope everyone finds love and learns to love themselves...
I settled for too less, abusive men due to childhood self worth issues, I felt that was normal to find unavailable men for whom you have to work hard to get love in return,,, but when I healed my inner child, I started saying no to anything less than amazing, not even the bare minimum. I know now that every human deserves love & care without doing hard work
Maybe you should engage in beautiful self talk
The #1 Reason most of us are single is that WE WANT TO BE! Peace is priceless and most people nowadays are full of toxicity and chaos!
Yep, agree.
Exactly..people are out here playing too many games and lying
Well said...
Yes 100%
Completely i am the happiest now and have been single for a while! ❤️❤️
Lewis, your a good listener, and you always ask the best questions. I liked everyone of your podcast! Thanks for being a cool person!
You're welcome,thank you for being here 💜
Be a single it was benefited both sides ,
So true when he talks about fulfilling the missing need of the other person. If you're attentive and can make the other person comfortable, people have a natural propensity to talk and reveal much about themselves and will tell you exactly what's missing from their life.
This applies in every human interaction whether it be romantic or professional.
So much info here I need a nice summary to recall the rest. Your comment did that for me. Thanks. :-)
I could listen to Robert Greene day after day. I love learning from him. As always thank you Lewis for unbeatable content.
So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to subscribe and leave me a review here:
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Society tells you that you must be in a relationship. I enjoy singleness but I only speak for me.
And then you get all kinds of crazies telling you that's not what you really feel or your so wrong.......but I'm right there with ya.......
Yes society screams it from the rooftops. I think it’s one of the biggest lies that society tells us. I’m not saying it’s not true for some people or heck maybe even most people. Some of us are OK with not being in a relationship. Some of us are better off not being in a relationship. And those who believe what society is telling them Just cannot seem to believe that a person who doesn’t wanna be in a relationship can be happy
Duh. That's how the human population survives.
Not society tell you that. It's our own minds that tell us. It's instinct.
I choose to be single because my last relationship was a complete lie I was married to a ConMan so that’s why I’m single. One marriage was enough!
🙏God Bless you
I am single because I want to be. Was married. Have family.
Not attracted by physical. Spiritual is most important!
Right it is spirituality... Energy and matching vibes...
I didn't have a healthy childhood or involved parents. I idealized my dad, even though we spent very little time together as a child after my parents divorced. My mother was not nurturing. My husband had a pretty good childhood. I feel lucky that he chose me, and we ended up being a good match. I think the success of our relationship has a lot to do with being young and inexperienced when we first got together. Neither of us had much baggage. More people should focus their effort on their young love. It seems easier to grow together and become the best version of yourself that is compatible with your partner, than it is to find someone that meets all of your expectations later on.
I feel if someone had a bad childhood, as long as their spirit is open to be a better person and is willing to learn, they can still find success in someone, but they have to choose a good partner and not a toxic one... these kind of ppl choose the toxic ones too often and are blind to the nurturing ones
@@DeRockMedia that's true.
I only find someone attractive once I've seen what they're like as a person from talking to them.
Once I am attracted to them as a person I start to see them as attractive.
They might have been physically attractive all along but I would never have even noticed until I realised how much I admire their character, their attitude, their ethos. Then i actually start seeing them for the first time. They transform in front of my eyes. It's only ever happened twice and it's a magical, unforgettable experience ♥️
I'm certainly not ever sexually attracted to someone until I feel love for them!
I think that's called being demi-sexual. I'm also like that. I know when someone would be attractive in the eyes of society, but I only feel personally attracted after I get to know someone and spend some time getting familiar with how they are.
@@shaimaadoma
that's the new term for it i believe
I just call it being normal, before certain members of society started trying to convince everyone else that being hypsersexualised was normal
🙄
Thanks for this interview
"Being more forgiving" - beautiful!!!
I came for Robert but Esther’s portion was also so insightful! She deserves more recognition. Great episode.
Agree, she was awesome
Agree 👍💯
What is her full name?
💯💫
Yes totally
I love Robert Greene.
I cannot stop listening to all his interviews. I’ve only just discovered him at 58 years old but I have now bought all his books and cannot put them down……I had a happy happy childhood with happy loving parents and I was a wonderful loving Mother to my son and so was my son’s Father.
Now all of my sons school friends tell me that they wished they had a Mum like me because their Mums never gave them the love or time when they were young and in my sons year at school.
Robert Greene is my hero….thank you ❤❤❤❤
Lewis, you always acknowledge your guest for their interview and for sharing something good into the world, so I want to acknowledge you for being such a great interviewer I really can see how passionate you are during the interview and how you actually listen to your guests and not only wait until you can talk. Hopefully I can learn this from you. Espero que tengas un buen día!!! Besos desde España 🥰
Thank you so much for your feedback 🙂
Yes he’s so passionate and into his guests. I Love his facial expressions when he reacts to the information given to him 😍
This guy is so spot on and knows a lot about women that most men don't have a clue about. Great interview.
He said in one interview his style of seduction was the Rake, who's a specialist in understanding women 🙂 I can definitely see that in him.
I have been single for so long now that I am truly enjoying it.
Yessssss 🙌🙌
After years and decades of being in other people’s “movies”, aka lives, their choices, their decisions, etc , I can finally be the star, director and producer of my own. One of the things I think that holds us back, at least what I found, was the imposter syndrome. I was doing, buying, making, etc in more of a robotic way because I felt I could fit in, get other’s approval, make others happy. But no matter how hard I tried, or how long or how much, I still ended up with a feeling of not enough. So, I changed my movie. I made me the star. Not in a vain or bad selfish way but healthy for me, setting boundaries. Then if others wanted to be in my “movie” ( aka life), they were welcome as long as they agreed it was my movie
Robert Green is a gift to mankind. His books are Gems for people who don't know people management
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Two wonderful and talented men coming together to make the world a more special place. Their kindness, patience,understanding and lack of overbearing ego is well noted. Their life partners are lucky ladies.👍❤
He so described my life. Been engaged 15 times. ran away every relationship. 60 years old this March, never been married. Mr. Greene is a genius
wow you got the juice! 15 times!
This is one of the greatest interviews you’ve ever done. Robert Green is amazing. One of my favorites.
1:00:59 and here shows how intuitive Lewis is to make sure his guest feels loved, important, and worthy, by understanding his deepest fears, lifting him up with praise and acknowledging how much good he has done with his work. @Lewis, you rock, and your intuitive sensitiveness keep me coming to your interviews, your words and questions are always on good timing.
Thank you so much for your feedback 🙂
Robert- what a calming, wise presence. Esther, I hang on every word you say. There were several times where I paused and replayed, needing to hear it again. Both of you have given me more insight into the world of partnership that I find really confusing. All made possible by Lewis. Thanks to all of you. 🙏
This is one of the best videos I've watched in a long time, Robert Green is a genius. I've learned so much from this video, thank you.
I have to say that Robert Greene talks about things that I’ve never heard expressed before in the mindset field. I’m getting so much value from this interview. 🧡
Man. Thanks for that acknowledgment at the end of Robert's interview. In a sense, you were thanking him on behalf of many of us seeing, who owe so much to Robert and wish could be able to thank him as well.
Robert Greene is a genius. He makes not just strategy and machiavellism something that common people can understand, from a point of view at it was and is a natural part of our evolution as a higher primate. But he also writes about narcissism egotism and that we need more empathy to understand others and our self to become more sofisticated and human. That is he breaks down both extremes of narcissism on one hand and empathy on the other, but without saying " be mr nice guy and it`s all gonna be fine". He is such a brilliant writer, and it`s also nice to see that he lives in the modern world and goes on youtube and also talk to real life influencers like Jordan Belfort or Mikaela Peterson. That is he acutaly makes the writing more real to us readers.
And as other has pointed out you are a brilliant intervjuer Lewis and listener!. Keep up the good work
I have Found Love and It's Not in another Person , and Is including My Relationship with the One Who made Me . I AM aware of what I AM OPEN to and will not ACCEPT what I AM Unaligned with , in The Kingdom.
@Paul Henn respectfully, what cult are you referring too?
so when god in genesis made woman from the rib or whatever of a man you think he wanted you to be single? 🤔
Bruh
I had one long term relationship (~6years) in my 20s that did what Greene was talking about a series of bad relationships can do. What made me leave was the fact that what I was going through in the relationship was turning me into my dad. Then earlier this year I watched all the star wars movies earlier this year and it hit me so hard. It also pushed me towards dealing with my childhood traumas so that I don't pass them onto my future kids.
What has this to do with star wars?
Yes Star Wars is fundamentally about George Lucas relationship with his Father. ( it all in there )
So much sooo that he sold the Franchise to be able to raise his daughter/ ( and not repeat the pattern )!
you can't be that bad if you're wholesome enough to love star wars lol
Ah I love this comment. Star Wars has so many deep life themes but seeing the main one applied to someone's real life is like ice cream on a hot day.
We all turn into our mom and dad’s eventually. It’s not that big a deal unless they were horrible to you. If they were be conscious of it and don’t turn into that part
I believe in lust at 1st sight, not love at 1st sight. In other words, it's infatuation.
You cannot love who or what you don't know.
Good insight!
Not true
You may not know the person but your psychology and energy recognises similar patterns. That's an evolutionary measure. Even in short introductory conversations the subconscious mind recognises what is familiar. Studies also show people often (but not always) fall for people who have face similarities to what they recognise. This may be their own face or a caregiver from childhood. As another commenter said in relationships often partners are trying to repeat and resolve past issues (almost entirely unconsciously). Unfortunately this is where projection occurs because in this the whole person is not seen, only the familiar patterns and the familiar outcomes from those patterns. So we don't fall in love so much as fall into old programmes. This is why people feel like they are dating the same person over and over again.
I disagree, it's the spirit of two people that connect at first meeting its not to do with the physical, it's so much deeper and has happened to me. Infact you have to connect on that deep unexplained level for a relationship to last.
I think love at first sight is possible in so far as you imidiatly see a projection of an energy that is inside yourself that you were already in love with.
This interview is so natural that it seems almost like a regular conversation. It's hard to pause because the conversation is so organic. It's not natural for a person to do it that naturally. There must've been a huge amount of effort for making that great listening&asking attitude, I guess. Admire you, Lewis.
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Thank you both for sharing. I believe in self awareness and self acceptance before you can move on and love and accept someone else. Lewis you are asking such real and genuine questions and Robert is answering them from the heart. 🙏
Absolutely Sara 💯. Couldn’t agree more
I love Robert Greene so much… he is truly a treasure. His books are fascinating and have a deep almost gothic feeling to them which really resonates with me. I’ve learned so much from him!
Perfect timing for these important messages, alot of notes taken. Thank you!
You're welcome,thank you for being here 💜
Lewis, you are an amazing interviewer. What I truly admire about you is the fact that in spite of being so aware and having so much of knowledge, you never come across arrogant like, yeah, am aware of that. In fact you do the exact opposite. You make the interviewee feel like they are giving you a complete new information again and again, like you are hearing and understanding it for the first time. You show so much of interest and are willing to listen to similar information with open perspective all the time. Definitely the best interviewer ever. I have so much to learn from you.
Lewis, You are simply an amazing interviewer! We appreciate your work so much. Thank You!
I liked being single for years. But I also love that I have finally met my man
I drive a lot and I truly get so much knowledge out of these. I love you guys
Being single is peaceful and serene. You can have beautiful friendships and not feel the need for a romantic relationship.
Thank you so much for interviewing him again! Plz invite him often ♥️♥️
The song, "what's love got to do with it?" Tina Turner, Comes to mind here. I've met a lot of men who don't actually want a relationship, yet they do want sex. They don't always tell you that either. Real relationships take time to build, many just assume that finding love is easy, and often our culture tells us that it doesn't take work period. When we build something we have to plan it out together and have both parties work toward the outcome.
Yep, there are lots of narcissists & worse out there. No love in them.
Trust me, modern younger women are the new “men” lol, and embody that problem perfectly. They all “just want to have fun”, no responsibility or accountability. Forming long term relationships with them is like trying to raise a daughter/child to behave correctly
I am fully aware, as many have decided to act like a lot of guys do... This look doesn't look good on anyone either! What's worse is that many a young woman saw this when it happened to their Moms, aunties, or older sisters, and now they think it's alright! Their now the jerks.... The pendulum has now swung the other way, and damn it all it still doesn't work! In the end it doesn't matter who does what if you're going to act like a s*** then don't get upset when you're treated like one!
Interesting correlation and take on it 👍
In SOuth Korean culture, there is a widely known dating rule- espcially when trying to find your life long soulmate, you must "seduce" the other partner- but not in a calculating way- but to make yourself elusive- or "not to easy to get" type of a person, such that the significant other has to "work" to earn your trust and to win you over. In western culture, seduction is known mainly for getting them in bed, but in south KOrean culture, it's considered and comes from more of an innocent motive. EVen if you see the other person "working you", you assume the best of that person and play along with them- to put yourself in that person's shoe and be flattered.. and fantasize about him or her while waiting to see them on the next date when tonight's date must be cut short. To be honest, I think it's the only way to date and eventually find your love.
Because I grew up in that environment, I could never force myself to be in a hurry to be in bed with someone as I could never feel sexually be attracted unless I am "seduced" where I have this emotional bond with the partner. ANyway, what a great interview- all of my life, I have felt it was due to cultural difference that I will never be able to find anyone in the western culture who would understand this way of thinking and dating. So yes, I whole heartedly agree, love requires an art of seduction.(BTW, it's not so much about seduction than, say to "don't let your partner get too comfortable with you too fast, such that he takes you for granted and there is no effort in the relationship to keep eachother excited and on his toes).
Yes but Korea is a conservative culture. The U.S. is a liberal culture. We don't have dating customs or even solid gender identity, roles or a common felicity. In many respects men and women are separate sociopolitical and socioeconomic classes and are viewed as such. Often, when a politician uses the word "families" you realize they are talking about single women's families. It is such that during the 08 recession the women's council had the stimulus directed away from men's families and toward women's. In essence, we don't have any basic level of societal cohesion pretty much post cultural revolution onward.
Western culture is skipping everything to sex, may be that is why people couldn't find love any more, many children not growing with two parents. Everything is a dopamine rush, impulsive and once drop from the high then the desire die, it feels mostly dopamine rush and more and more people are becoming single. It will be interesting to see where and how this affect the community in few decades. It could be bad or good yet it is defiantly changing family, children upbringing, community and all.
This is the same in India. It's probably because Eastern cultures valued strong familial ties, mainly outside of a religious context like Mr. Robert mentions. Men and women had traditional roles but they were complementary and balancing to themselves and to society as a whole.
I suck at seduction when many women at college doneve n paid attention to me when I'm out here living life.
That is why I do not believe online dating is noy for me you do not get the emotional and spititual connection. You have to be eye to eye.
Yep it’s just not the same as being physically in the same place..
By far the most motivating eye opening I’ve ever heard … so much information and light bulb moments.
Thank you so much Lewis for asking the right questions! So eye opening 💕
So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to leave me a review here: podcastaddict.com/podcast/2508394 or at podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/id596047499
Robert is an amazing author that has helped to transform my life...big tks from Brazil 😍☘️🇧🇷
👍
This women is the most intellectual woman we have today.
The wey she answer the question simple but deep soft but so strong easy but so meaningful
I can’t have enough of. Interviews like this
Robert is a legend . His insightful analysis on simple social theories and life ethics is wonderful. Bless him
I met a woman a month ago and we connected so much as far as hobbies, what we like and don’t like. It was an otherworldly experience for me. I’ve never been in a relationship before and I get super nervous around women. Because I’m a dummy she doesn’t want to talk to me anymore. I have much to learn. Thanks for the interview, the knowledge and wisdom!
I'm in the same boat brother. You're good looking, work on your game and focus on yourself and the right woman will come
You're welcome,thank you for being here 💜
I struggle, I get ghosted all the time, I'm certainly not a bad looking dude, but I have asperger syndrome, albeit very mildly, but my main concern is I don't know where to meet women.
@@aaronfitzgerald9109 you can meet us here in the comment section lol
@@aaronfitzgerald9109 Have look at Coach Corey Wayne his advice will put you completely on the right track. His CZcams channel is here czcams.com/video/aS3oxcTk-9Q/video.html
Not only can you talk to the other person but can you two be completely silent in the same room without feeling abandoned, neglected, etc.
Really touching and sincere acknowledgement by Lewis towards Robert for his work. Bravo.
👍
We are so focused on self and defying living according to our biology. We have instant gratification and yet, we are more miserable than ever. We constantly have to prove we are just as good or better than, rather than being just as good or better.
The current social external pressure is to question what sex you are… this is very singular. Society has now forced single life as much as previous social forces pressured people to not be single.
we are at our weakest now because of instant gratification
@@thatguy6207 yeah i agree pushing people not to be single is silly but pushing people to be single is even more silly, and also how long before the human race dies out? lol
This is so beautiful, I love this. I think the only thing missing because it's out of scope of the framework is the realisation that with awakening or freedom from identifying as the personality then complete freedom in relationship occurs. This is total love of yourself and consequently love of other too ! Until then everything is a kind of therapy and healing. There will still be healing and playing out even then but with light shone on it, it will be super quick. The other point is as long as you hold to the other giving you something there has to be fear. When you absolutely know you are complete and need nothing then the relationship is a gift of love !! Anyway very beautiful video, thank you xxx
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
My dad was too busy with his business and we lived in different countries. I felt I grew up in a single family while my mom has always been very strict to us - I felt I could only stay at home/ with them if I’m a good daughter in their eyes / benchmark. I really want a good family for myself, and grow old with my man. Now I need to solve my issue not able to staying in a long term relationship, avoid blaming the parenting issue. I’m not going to blame my parents because they’ve their own problems and karma.
2:00:.. Lewis YOUR memory 100% WILL bring SMILES. .. One's that come from the HEART! Your flat out amazing! And so appreciated!
Appreciate you! 🙏
Robert Greene is my HERO!!! I'm so happy to have stumbled across him 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Amazing interview 🧨🧨🧨
Thank you!
Watching this Robert talk about vulnerability, I realise I as an INFJ have a natural advantage when it comes to seduction. I know no other way than to be very emotionally open and vulnerable with others, and also to allow them to open their inner world to me without fear of judgement.
Same infj❤
Infj here, I do have the ability to make some people vulnerable but I don't easily become vulnerable with people I tend to be closed off :(
Wow! Thank you so much for being such a great interviewer. You’re amazing at pulling out the gems from the people you interview that are pertinent and relatable to all of us.
So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to subscribe and leave me a review here:
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@@lewishowes So thankful for you. 🙏🏼
I’m in love with Robert Greens Voice..
brilliant Guy
I like your ability to ask right questions
I grew up with a cold father and find that I'm attracted to individuals who don't display a lot of emotion. I found the perfect combination by entering a long-term relationship with an individual who has aspergers. The love and commitment is there with a gorgeous, genius but I have a lot of space.
Interesting
You have to like each other. And respect and good manners are huge!
Absolutely
I love Robert, such a charming and adorable person, plus his tremendous keen awareness and intelligence !
Lewis man, thank you so much for putting yourself on the line each time and putting great care to ask questions that hit smack at the center of things. You can't imagine how much your work gives extraordinary help. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!
You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡
His voice is gentle and comforting 💕
🧡
These two interviews were so on point. Crazy. Thanks Lewis
So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to leave me a review here: podcastaddict.com/podcast/2508394 or at podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/id596047499
Addressing a distressed relationship is crucial here love this podcast Thank You!
So happy you are enjoying the content. I would love for you to subscribe and leave me a review here:
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Yesss please, this is definitely a MUST WATCH!!! Thank you! 😍😍
Appreciate you! 🙏
Its a delight listening to Robert Greene's wisdom🙏
Beautiful and humble
this nailed it, I am more aware of my issue now
Robert Greene is my favourite author. And the host asked good questions.
I don't believe in looking for love, love will find you when your ready to give and receive love. But until then I'll continue to be very happy being single. And remain open and ready for the right connection.
Horrible advice
If you dont have the desire to make an effort to be in a relationship and you are so happy being single. There is no reason whatsoever to suggest that you're going to be in longterm romantic relationship.
Women have a very short window before their options expire, I wouldn’t advise waiting too long. Careers and traveling are fun but at the end of the day nothing beats having a family to come home to. There’s a reason single ppl die earlier :/
Funnily enough - during the Errol Flynn reference this so reminded me of what qualities we look for when rearing and handling stallions (horse) is true for picking seductive men…someone who is secure in themselves and make you feel a sense of calm (as a woman). The same is seen in nature - which means you do know what you’re looking for when you look for your future partner, you just have to hold the standard and wait for the right “feeling” 😌
Yeah hold on to that idea. You will likely find it on your next life jjj
That's bullshit.
Erol Flynn "my wicked wicked days" biography
@@andromaxbse6459 shame you think so
FLYNN was a Hollywood legend like no other stop commenting on him brainwashed girls
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Preach Robert!!!!! Connection on a spiritual level beyond surface Level!!!! Yasssss 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 say it louder for the ppl in the back 🗣 I’m so over superficial surface level connections 😔
He speaks so clearly like he writes . I enjoyed that interview. Good jobs
Glad you enjoyed it!
I don’t think that it is sexual attraction with mother or father, I think you look for your mother or father’s qualities in the partner because this is what you know how to deal with, anything else other than that makes you feel scared of the unknown so you look for familiar to be comfortable in the relationship. It is like formed ego and without it you are lost, so people are not able to get rid of it even though that brings them pain but at least they know how to deal with it instead of living spontaneously in unknown. I
Men always relate everything to sex. Even the most innocent relationships.
There’s so much good information, thank you for sharing!
You're welcome,thank you for being here 💜
I kind of touched on this idea a little while ago, I started thinking that people have all these problems for not matching their own ideals and understanding the things the want. The things we want reflect that onto ourselves in the form of insecurities.
He makes a LOT of great points!
#1 relationship guidance - how are you going to take care of someone else before you're able to take care of yourself.
So true