Right sister, my bullying is in my face!!! Being the only black, it trickles down to me!!!! I just don't have anything saved and the benefits are good. Department of Corrections as an officer!
I walked off my job one day with out giving notice. I went into work early that morning before most people even arrived. I sat at my desk and didn’t even take off my jacket. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I just got up and walked out. I never said a word to anyone. I went home turned off my phone and went back to bed.
I quit my job today. I just couldn't take the disrespect anymore. Being used to train others and then watching them get employee of the month. Never being given credit because I'm black. I said that's it.
That happened to my bff a few months ago. They kept promising her a fairy tale position and never came through. I was so glad she finally left and now being paid more.
Call it what it is, racism and bullying on the job and Black women experience it more than any other race and thank you so much for addressing this issue because we suffer more health wise, stress, high blood pressure, fibroids, anxiety, and depression.
Yes, because of fear of your abilities. It's sad. I even had a teacher that tried to fail me and when that didn't work, her and her sidekick lied on me. Followed by withdrawal from school.
I quit my very toxic job last May 13, 2022 as a Program Manager. That job put me in a VERY dark place and deep depression. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder during my time at that job and still battling it. I still haven’t found a job but I’m in a better place now and don’t regret the decision I made. I probably should’ve made it sooner. Don’t ever let a job cost you your peace and/or health. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
I just resigned from my job last Tuesday January 17, 2023 at 10am CST. It had to be done. I got a new opportunity and I want it. The system is just so toxic. I haven't told my family yet because I didn't want to be talked out of it. I want to grow and save myself. I'm 55 and I have only one life.
I left my toxic job on 1/30/23 and I’m also 55 y.o. My husband knows and he was pissed 😤 but he quickly came to realize how traumatizing the job was for me. My mom or other family do not know because I am not trying to hear “the speech”.
I lost my job on Feb 17th because I wouldn't get on her team. Crazy that I'd convinced myself that I had finally, after so many jobs I got the one. Here I am at 55 with no income. Just told my kids, didn't want to be judged. One knows and didn't when I told her why, the other doesn't know yet. Blessings to all on this feed. My anxiety and ptsd kicks in when I have to apply for jobs.
The job is not toxic and the work you perform is not toxic. What’s toxic is the supervisors and upper management who are toxic. They have issues and are toxic and need to get help.
My breaking point was when I was terminated while on medical leave for late-stage cancer. I was loyal to that company. I worked 12-16 hr days. When the white co-worker broke her leg after falling over her dog, they bent over backward to accommodate her by giving her the option to work from home including having IT come to set her up. I was diagnosed and treated for late-stage cancer, and I was terminated. I still have PTSD behind that.
Yes this is why I stay, but for me, I was laid off from one toxic job, I go get another one and it's toxic to, I was hoping after this last one could find me a fully remote position because for me it's never the job it's always the people on the job, I'm a black women with autism and it is always a struggle for me to fit in and normally people will use this against me, so this new job is hybrid so I'm thinking 🤔 oh I can handle 3 days with co workers boy was I wrong, these people have been bullying me to no ends, leaving information out, from refusing to sit by me as if I have disease, pure disrespect, I know I need to go but I need the money and medical insurance , because due the last toxic place, I have medical issues
Walked out last week from a toxic job, just couldn't do it anymore, worked the the 3rd shift and had no support from management I needed help with cargo mainly a forklift driver to help put cargo on this Giant ass x-ray machine....these men would flat-out refused unless it was something they needed screening. Well I complained to management and it feel on deaf emails, texts, lol anyway I finished my shift one night and never went back, now they want to text me, call me...I'm not answering 😤😆
I'm done convincing EVERYONE. Even myself. I've only been back in the workforce for five years (after being a wife+stay @ home parent for 14yrs) & I'm GETTING OUT. End of story. I've applied for equestrian schools, working as a park ranger, water/ocean conservationist. This is all to prepare me to move abroad with skill sets that will help me live more in nature. I NEED to live closer to the sun & nature. My literal life is depending on it. We can all do this; no matter how different or similar our goals may be. Remember, baby steps are still steps. Breathe Black Women while we get FREE! For all good things FLOW UNTO ME! Asé✨
just a kind warning - black women please please save yourself the trouble and don't be an activist/community organizer for a living. it's the most draining thing ever -- unless you come with a cape that is non-flammable. burn the cape lol, it's not worth the damaging effects on your mental, spiritual, and physical health.
All marching/muling, didn't even benefit BW! It benefits BM to the point that no one cares about our femicide rate being at every 4.8 hours. All of the criminal justice warrior-ing, only put criminals back in our predominantly black neighborhoods, to terrorize the community. We read these horrible stories about BW&kids being un-alived by BM. People ask "Why was he let out early etc etc?" This the thanks we get.
I left my government job a year ago to be self employed. I planned and saved for over a year and am now thriving in this season of softness and deep rest. My job wasn't toxic per se but it was exhausting and dysfunctional. I'm so glad I left! God provides and I now am happy, healthy and hopeful in ways I've never been. Give yourself permission to forge a new path for yourself.
I was seriously sitting here thinking, but my job isn’t toxic and not “that” exhausting, however, it is exhausting and in my opinion, dysfunctional. I’ve literally said that I feel so bad that I’m not appreciative of my position because I prayed for one that would simply give me some room to breath throughout the day. I have breathing room and more, but it’s just not enough, anymore. I’ve recently received a life altering diagnosis and I keep saying, this is happening to get my attention. I’m ready to resign today and just figure it out, but I’m really concerned that walking away will create more stress in my life and exacerbate the diagnosis. Another concern is I’ve felt this way about most of the jobs I’ve had and I’ve had plenty, so I feel like I’ve allowed the stress to compound over the the years and now I feel like I’m going to die on the job. The sad thing is I’m a Health and Wellness Coach who works in employee wellness for a large government agency and I feel like I’m lying to myself and my colleagues about the wellness interventions I’m encouraging them to do. I do feel like the interventions actually saved my life but because I probably would’ve been dead if I wasn’t practicing them, so that’s my only hope in continuing to share these interventions.
Wow, good for you, love. I'm trying to do the same. Your statement gives me hope. I have a government job as well! I'm so over it.I've been here for 8 years smh. Deep sighs ....Keep me in prayer! Thanks 🙏🏾
I worked for 21+ years in the most toxic environment on earth, prison. The last 4 years, I left twice in an ambulance. But I was trapped in my career. I worked there most of my adult life, and didn’t know how to start over someplace else. Thank God I was close to retirement. I crawled to that pension and never looked back. I moved out of state, take sabbaticals as needed, and will NEVER work for anybody ever again! Book coming soon.
I understand. That was me. I hated that job for 8 years. Started having panic attacks there. I knew I had to leave. Watching many folks die in their 30’s and 40’s.
When friends and family tells you to stay in a toxic job or relationship they are expressing their own fear. If you look at their lives they are probably living a lie in a long relationship that's drowning them but they are too afraid to make changes. It's best not to tell them. Just tell them when you have moved on . Just say better opportunities have come your way and you have moved on. Life is about change and growth. If it's a toxic relationship just say " I've given it all I could and it's taking a toll. It it's time treat myself well" .
Eileen, you are so right! People think you are crazy if you want to leave a lucrative job. They don't understand that money isn't everything nor what one goes through. If you're dead or acquire debilitating depression or illness what good is money?
I am having difficulty forgive myself for staying at a job where I was disrespected and passed up for promotions and given difficult accounts. I can't forgive myself. I am leaving my on Friday February 3, 2023 to my new job on Monday, February 6, 2023. I had to leave and save me. I took action. Year 2023 MUST BE DIFFERENT FOR ME.
I agree they know what they are doing and want to destroy BW mentally. I praise God the Lord Yeshua has my mind, they can never destroy me. Stay out of toxic environments and pray / listen to the Word of God for healing. God bless.
I retired from the Air Force after 21 years of miserable & abusive service. Made it to the highest enlisted rank but still endured disrespect, racism & belittlement. I will never allow myself to “stay” in a toxic situation again. I have PTSD & struggle everyday from the trauma I experienced in battle & from white racist men.
Sister, please know that can release that stress...a little bit at a time. Do all that you can to release it so that it's not bottled up inside. Your health depends on it.
So sorry for what you endured. I’m am glad you are making a new life for yourself and pray that God helps you with your trauma ( you may need to go to counseling, if so find a blk female, if possible). I wish you success in your new life, remember hope is a good thing and age is irrelevant. God bless and thank you for your service 💕
I left teaching after 18 years of service. My school became so unsafe that I cried each morning before walking on campus. I literally feared what would transpire during the school day. One day I sat at my desk and said “this is your last day”. I didn’t pack any of my personal belongings. I walked out the door and didn’t look back. I was fortunate that I used my soft skills to land an IT contract job. I am healing each day, but I still feel the remnants of the trauma I endured as a post-pandemic educator.
Public schools especially predominantly black ones are becoming very unsafe. I believe the prison to pipeline starts at home. It's not the teachers job to raise the kids, or break up fights and get cussed out all day. At one time we black folks respected teachers and made our kids "Mind" and behave at school. Nowadays, we see black moms on social media saying stuff like " I am going to kick a teachers azz if they tone is wrong talking to my child etc" Like they are proud to fight the teacher and set horrible examples for their kids. My grandkids don't go to public school. Thank God! As a collective, Black parents, are failing their kids in home training.
@@hotcarmel12 I agree. There were too many times when I was confronted and even bullied by Black parents. My car vandalized, things stolen from my desk, Zoom bombed and cursed out, and even being followed to my car after school by an irate parent with gang affiliations. The list goes on and on. And I hate to say it, but the abuse I took from my own people was part of the reason for leaving.
Same here, but I worked at a special needs school. It was the only one in the district that would accept students with severe mental illnesses. They were violent, and honestly we weren’t capable of teaching a class with an individual who could literally destroy the room, or self harm or harm us. But we were still expected to try and teach.
@@JayKennedy101That must have been really challenging. I can empathize with your experience. And I’m glad you are safe and no longer subjected to that danger. ❤️
@@kamilah4love and this starts in PreK now! Can you believe it? I saw a little PreK boy kicking the principal of a school I once worked at.I’ve witnessed parents cursing out and threatening teachers in front of their kids ( the parents kids) I don’t blame the teachers for walking away. It’s really getting worst, especially in black communities. I fell bad about saying this but they have the worst behavior issues.
I have had a TIA stroke getting up to go to work, and got fired because I got sick. I have left another job and went straight to the hospital with blood pressure above 200, with blood vessels that snapped in my frontal lobe. I have worked a job where I was yelled at and harassed and every Wednesday I was sent to a meeting with managers and emotionally abused me. So, now I am working my own job as a travel advisor....much better.
My wake up call: there were many and the last straw was my Latina supervisor telling me that her team doesn’t want to work with me. I aways thought that I didn’t care what people thought of me as long as I’m doing my job well and I’m getting paid. I was the only specialist who wasn’t promoted after at most 2 years- I had been working there for 4+ years! Just recounting this brings a heaviness on my heart 😢
@@peacefreedom4930 I'm a nurse of 30.years. Early in my career I found hospital work environment to be toxic. I left and found an area in nursing that I thrive in and it's rewarding. Look into other areas of nursing if it's truly your passion.
@@StephaniePerry I’m making an exit plan now. Giving myself by the end of February to walk away from my job and to never look back! All you ladies keep me motivated. Thank you!
Dr. Sands, you are telling my story!!! As the only black female on a technology team, I'd had enough in a male dominated financial industry. I put up with the drama of attacks, whisper campaigns, sabotage and the gaslighting for 19 years. I tried changing jobs over the years, etc. Once my youngest graduated from H.S. I totally bolted. I walked away with a big smile on my face 20 years ago! That job had me physically ill. So much anxiety starting around 6pm Sunday night I'd start tripping. Every morning I'd be on my knees crying, praying and begging God for strength to go to work. On my way in the mornings I was walking towards the building like I was going to the electric chair. I had broken sleep, stomach issues, put on meds for. Went from that to surviving an aneurysm, landing in the ICU! After that ICU stay, I made up my mind. I said to myself, first they made me ill, then wound up in the ICU, I asked myself what's next? THE GRAVE??? I had to save my own life and I did. I planned my exit, I got rid of my debt first and in 6 months I was gone. I smiled all the way on my train ride home. I have felt safe ever since. No regrets, very happy, never looked back. God has taken great care of me! He will work it out!
@@liftingasweclimbconsulting Thank you sis! Yes, PTSD is real. I had not-so-pleasant dreams about that "prestigious" (they're the worst offenders) organization for about a month after.
Sadly, my toxic job experience sounds so similar to Dr Kimani. Thankfully, after 16 years with a federal employer I took a 21 day vacation to Kenya and first time in years did not have severe GI issues. Upon return, I decided I would not return, took almost a year without pay while pending disability retirement approval. Praise be to God I was approved Nov 22 with back pay!!! Thank you and love you both!
Last Thursday I was preparing files, running around the office like a chicken with my head cut off, answering the phone, greeting clients that were dropping off tax documents as I was the only employee for a CPA. I thought I heard the Client that was speaking to my boss say the n word, mind you I was extremely busy at the time and was not able to stop what I was doing to listen a bit closer to the conversation. Near the end of their meeting, I heard her partner tell my boss that his grandfather was a Klux Klux Klan member, he was a good man just old school. When I asked why he did not ask them to leave his office after having made racist comments his response was "people say a lot of things". My Jewish boss sat there and listened to that knowing it was a possiblity I overheard parts of the conversation. I told him to write my check because I could no longer work for him.
Resigned on MLK holiday last week! I was a marketing director at a HBCU… 🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️ 💨💨 … my toxic boss was “fake” being nice for two weeks upon hearing I was leaving. BUT the day I gave notice, he upgraded my job to a VP position and 13k more than I made, and POSTED IT ON INDEED while I was still sitting at my desk. I never went back.
I resigned from a toxic environment that I stayed in for almost eight years. The environment was toxic from day one. I stayed because I was a single mom and the provider for so many people.
I'm dealing with a very condescending and passive-aggressive manager. This week has been very rough for me. I know it's time for me to bounce, and I will soon. Thank you for the encouragement!
I feel like that's the worse because it's hard to prove. It's hard to complain about the microagressions; the condescending, passive aggressive behavior because it's like they know how to backtrack and make it look like YOU'RE the problem. But it's still toxic and completely disrespectful to be on the receiving end of such treatment. Hope you can bounce soon!
@@jennajewert Yes, this is what I'm conflicted with. I've made up my mind to not even counter his foolishness. Instead I'll focus on putting my energy into taking the steps to leave! Thank you for understanding!
I’m happy to see sisters talking about this disease of toxic workplace that affects black woman-this is a real issue, indeed! Happy for the movement!💯💜
I was recently terminated as a result of retaliation against me. The environment was severely toxic, traumatic and abusive. The abuse was implemented by a black manager, under the instruction of a white director. It was literally hell. My faith and beliefs sustained me. Although the termination was hurtful, I walked away with my peace of mind.
I personally realized that my now former workplace was toxic when I faced the fact that there was an intentional, concerted effort to thwart my professional growth. When it got to the point that I was taking an Excedrin Migraine before going into the office, I said ENOUGH. I left the end of November 2022, and with excellent references, from my immediate supervisor, the CEO and the director of HR, as well as the former office manager of the department who was a mentor to me. I could tell my supervisor was pained that I was leaving. He invited me out to lunch a week after I left. He said all the right things...but too late.
@honeybrown1997. I’m glad that you & so many like you are making your ways out of Toxicity & Madness. And I’m glad you got the “papers” & references you’ll be needing to press on. Someone TOLD me this about 2.5 decades ago & I only understood part of it then-there ARE people who have no other “real”reason to live without being able to look down on & to dole out mistreatment to whomever they see “fit” to mistreat. In fact, they get a rush of satisfaction every time they do so. It’s an unfortunate fact of life for most of us-even those who’ve never played in to the stereotypes of “shiftless, lazy, thieving, sly, etc., etc.” Maybe more correctly, ESPECIALLY if you don’t. Because of course, there has to be a reason, a justification for deeply-held beliefs in the inherent inferiority of other people. If you don’t (or can’t) give them one, it only motivates more hostility, rather than concession. That’s how my experience shaped-out anyway. I wish you & all the Ladies of Comfort & Ease more than your rightful share of it! I’m pretty certain you’ve earned it! 💖🏝👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Just resigned from a toxic, hostile environment this past Sat. and I don't have the new job lined up. Just couldn't go one more day!! I'll be going to Costa Rica in May for a month scouting for a place to retire. Thank you for this platform and for bringing your calling to fruition. Thank you for leading "Black" women to liberation!!👏🏾
The HOLYSPIRIT, told me jobs are a Curse that not many escape. He said we so called black people are the greatest thing he created, he said we are Brilliant and that's how we were able to invent so many things. The Lord said going to a job is a choice but Fear is what keeps people on them. He said we black people need to use our mind to make money. The Lord has my sister and I making plans for our business, he said he already have customers waiting on us. He told us to EXECUTE. He also said he wanted us to help take his people to the spiritual PROMISED LAND. JUDAH is about to RISE. God Bless
I resigned too back in sept no job lined up! Then finally landed a job right before christmas. Its manageable but definitely reminds me of why i dont need to deal with anymore jobs! Too controlling! Time to break free!
@Shanteria I got the chills reading your post! You are so on point. The workforce is just another form of bondage that The Most High delivered us from. It's like when the slaves were "freed," some stayed because they couldn't see a way to survive. Granted, they were left with nothing. However, we are a gifted people. We know how to make something out of almost anything! We're waking up and walking into our purpose! We are royal people! Nap time is over!! I no longer choose to be a part of the rat race or run on the hamster wheel! By the way I came out of an 11 yr nightmare this past June and jumped right into hell and stayed 7 months and jumped right out. Let's go melanated people!!
Sometimes when you’re at the toxic job fighting for your pension…..you may not live to see it. I see it so much at my job working 16hr days sometimes 24hrs. It’s not worth it. My job has caused me to be disabled. Ladies save yourselves. You’re worthy of ease….don’t be forced into it!!!!!!
@@villcat9750 I can retire early in 3 more years. A lot of coworkers say that I should wait to get full retirement in 11 year. My response has been, I won't make it to that age if I stay here.
And one topic that needs to be discussed is this... why are other Black people mean to each other on the job, and why do they cooperate with the oppressive group towards another Black person? What is the pay off for that behavior? I would see it over and over again. The Blacks would work with the oppressive management against a Black woman. Just an awful look.
Yep..this has happened to me multiple times and the last time she was the token bw and I wouldn't follow her lead. I saw how she was the last one to go to lunch while training me..she just never stopped. Yet she was super smug and thought she was better than me. Long story short she went on leave for surgery and they ended up firing her because they no longer wanted to pay for her medical Leave. This was the same woman who was mad because when I came on I got a raise with everyone else because the were raising the pay for that position. For the year I was with them I used them to my benefit. I took a paid Leave and applied for a grant before they became catty with me because it was evident that I wasn't the normal token bw and I wasn't taking their bs. The Director of the unit was a light skinned bw who told me I always looked angry. I would literally be minding my own business but I realized why the unit didn't have other ppl of color on it. She was a main factor in it. She was also a token and her ways was very much similar to a prejudice white person. Before I left I told her off too..she told me I went too far but she let "her ppl" set me up and attack me. I didn't show up the next day and they let me go right before the pandemic hit America hard but after me so many ppl quit..
@Chocolate Radiance I am so glad you got out of that situation. I have so much to say on this topic, but I will summarize my thoughts by saying I have experienced what you describe time and time again. It's like when we are professional Black women on the job, sometimes the Whites just dislike us because we are Black. Their assumption is that we are all idiots, with no knowledge and unworthy of the jobs that we've been hired to do. And with other Blacks, they often dislike the new Black person because of how the person looks or because the new person might knock them off their position of being the Black person that performs well. In other words, the Blacks see the new Black person as competition in the eyes of the Whites. As educated, professional Black women, we face a lot in the work place. I'm so glad that my friend sent me a link to this topic because I see that I'm not the only one.
The loyalty that we have given employers has destroyed us as Black Women. I am no longer committed to an employer; my mental and physical health are more important. My self-worth and value are not based on a work title, nor can I be bought with a salary. Thank you, ladies, for this inspiring conversation. Dr. Kimani is correct when she said that leaving is a process. I have stayed on my job because I love what I do! Working with older adults. The organization and site manager are unresponsive and uninvolved in the daily operation of what we do in our jobs. It's a HARD NO for me, and I'm out!!!
I was let go from my job and the financial fear is what I'm dealing with however I'm working on launching my travel business. I've travelled to 16 countries and have a true passion for it. I'm doing my best to move past this financial fear, and overwhelming feeling of starting a business and funding it.
The Lord told me jobs are a choice but Fear is what keeps people on them. He also said they were a curse that not many escape, he said we black people need to use our mind to make money. He said we are BRILLANT and the best thing he created.
I can relate so closely to this conversation! I left corporate career where I was in a very toxic environment. I decided to go work in education to support our children who were being left behind. I loved being there for the children but the obvious racism was palpable. The disparity is real in regards to black children. Black staff were expected to be the everything to everyone but never formally supported in their vision while the least thing their white counterparts did was exhausted. I was retirement age but know I could have continued to work. I retired. My health has significantly improved. I just don’t know what to do now. Income would be nice.
The way I have allowed myself to be devalued and disrespected at my job makes me sick to stomach because I'm allowing this for a paycheck. I'm applying out now but definitely let this go on too long
It should be a husband's role and responsibility to provide such that the wife and mother of his children can avoid toxic work environments in the first place and focus on the home and child rearing and perhaps a home based business or non-toxic remote work, if necessary. It should not be the key responsibility for a wife and mother to raise income for the entire household and too many black women find ourselves in this breadwinner role, married or not. At a minimum, it could be a shared responsibility, ideally as a family business. Consulting engagements and entrepreneurship appear to be the best options for black women to avoid the ills of the toxic work place.
A BW I know never left her job on her own. It was a stroke and not being able to speak afterwards that forced her out. She applied to over 10 different jobs to move up and it never happened. The stress, racism, and microagressions destroyed her health.
Thank you so much for being here. May 30, 2023, I am out. I will be in retirement for sure. So much dispectfulness, liars, setting me up to fail, so much jealousy, Directors, Deputy in authority positions. The Federal Government Department of Defense hates us. I had to contact my attorney and EEO. Now, they tried to be nice to me. After 23 years, they used my supervisor, a Black man, to get at me making up lies, saying I lacked in my performance but had me training all the employees. After all these years, I had never been written up. Made up lies on the days I was out having a precedure with the doctors note provided. All these years going to work. Written up 2 months out of 23 years. They just do not want a Black Woman making 6 figures and making more then every one in the office, and I am not a supervisor. No one had my back either. So much I can say but I will end here. Thank you, ladies, for this video hats off to you both. 👏🏽 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
So true… older people would say “Stay at your job!” I get it though and I understand where they were coming from based on their generation but we have to understand that we matter too
Hello Ladies, I left my job November 2022. My mother passed in September 2022 while I was out on bereavement my supervisor called and asked me…so are you coming in? I was like thinking to myself, are you serious I just lost my mom, my best friend my heart is broken. A bell went off in my head. I was already sick of the job the people we’re so racist. I felt like I was just the token. They all belonged to the same church, Mormon, not throwing shade on anyone’s religion. Anyway, I would dread going into the office. I would have knots in my shoulder’s, crying on the way to work. While I was there I could not focus, I would have frequent anxiety attacks. The palms of my hands broke out with some type of eczema, the doctors said it was from stress. Since I left, no more shoulder or neck pain. I can breath clearly once again. I haven’t went back to work, I would like to find something to do that doesn’t require going to a nine to five. I’m 56 and trying to figure out my life.
Go in prayer. Talk to God, and listen for His direction. I know that it sounds simple and cliche, but God got me through 3 years of unemployment after a termination. My health improved, my bills were paid and my soul was happy. He will direct your steps.
A lot of teachers, are leaving, especially the younger ones.. in nyc there is a 30 years before u get a full pension, but they are leaving in droves ( I think the Covid-19 lockdown had many teachers thinking about their mental health) their is a 1/2 million deficit of teachers in the USA after Covid…they are just leaving due to burn out, no administration support, health going downhill and depression
Poor physical and mental health care + lack of support is the recipe for disaster. I’m glad to see them leaving, and I hope even more Black women do the same. 💗
This conversation is a reflection of my experience working in Healthcare for almost 15 years. I've changed organizations and it is the same behavior across the board. It is soul draining.
@@queendom774 aww that’s sweet of you. I’m okay. I’m still in corporate but I’ve toughened my skin for now. My goal is still to have my own. I just inherited a house that will provide some income so that’s a start.
@@candiedsugarxo4462 I am good, my workplace is a whole lot better than it was, but I do need a career BREAK FAST, and I'm working on it!!! Thanks for asking!
What really gets me is the field of social work and counseling are helping professions yet a lot of times there is toxicity and bullying in these fields. It’s also very cliquish.
Certain fields are very toxic for us, because society expects us to take on a lot at work. And other blacks will try to gaslight you if you aren't stressed out or doing as much as they are doing. We have to put ourselves first and keep it moving!
When I was in my MA in counseling program I was amazed that those toxic people were preparing to become therapists. Makes me look at therapists differently than before for sure.
I have almost this same story! I left my toxic job in 2021 after being ill and depressed. It was awful. Life has been steadily improving since I left. I'm about to take my first 30 day sabbatical in March!
I think I'm going through the grieving stage, because 22 years of your life and you ask yourself "what have I been doing"? You start to question everything. I quit in August 2022 and I'm now I'm praying I find my purpose before my savings runs out. But its putting my faith in Yahweh to be where I'm supposed to be. I've traveled to many places but when I come back home to America I'm always in a depression I can never get out of, its time to go.
I felt that way just last year my job fired me 6months after I had my daughter & two weeks later had a heart attack!!! At 34yrs old. Yup..I have a story to tell & I'm NOT healed. This message ABSOLUTELY AB-SO-FREEKN-LOOTLY Triggered Me🤧 Where does one go from here?..with not even a pot to piss in type of place..not a STEP to step on. Where do those like us go?..Where do we start?
Honestly, I am not healed either. I have found therapy to be extremely helpful for me in processing and healing from the Workplace Traumas. Please note that two Foundations periodically provide free therapy services/vouchers for Black Women: 1). The Boris Lawrence Henson Foundation & 2). The Loveland Foundation
Hi - I received a 95% performance review as a Student Advocate. I asked my super how can I get 100%. This lady said, "You have to live and breathe Student Advocate." I never received 100% cus I refused to take work duties past the doors of the school when my work day ended! Work-Life Balance!!!!! 🤗
I left my job last year after almost 20 years. The job in itself wasn’t toxic, but the culture was. I was on antidepressants for 7 years I was tired of the microaggressions and being spoken down to by people that take pride in being stupid. Unfortunately I picked up on the fact that some of the Black coworkers that I had were throwing me under the bus for basic crumbs on the table. I’m in a much better job with a good culture now. It is very important to create your own safe space within your job, if something doesn’t sit well and there is potential for it to bring your downfall, GET OUT OF THERE! Your well-being is more than a job.
I, too, enjoyed my work and was hoping one day they'd accept me as their equal, trying to be perfect for racists management. Working killer OT...yet they only saw me as their garbage dump for more work. During daily department calls, if I spoke my ideas or input was either belittled or ignored. After 8 months in the department, I started having numbness in my let arm. That's when I decided I had to quit, as I was internalizing the stress and pain/disrespect. First time I every quit a job! It felt great! My body even welcomed back my "monthly friend" when I thought it was done! LOL
Great. The HOLYGHOST told me that jobs are a curse that NOT many Escape. He said going to a job is a choice but Fear is what keeps people there. The Lord said we black people are BRILLANT and that's how we were able to invent so much. He said we need to use our minds to make money. The Lord also said we are the best thing he created and that we black women are his CROWNS, his QUEENS. I love JESUS, he let's my sister and I know often how special we are to him. He said he loves us so much his heart hurts. Oh, he's so precious very precious. The Lord said we are owner operators. God Bless
I started feeling numbness in my fingers and lightheaded. I realized that I hadn't taken a lunch or break in 6 months!! Working straight through even OT!! I am now home nourishing my body and cleaning my apartment and back to working on my art, which brings me peace & joy! I was neglecting everything I love & everything that loves me. Self-care is not cliché it's a real thing!! Let's take care of ourselves mind, body, soul and spirit!!
When I started watching this video, it had approximately 745k views. As the video is ending it has over 920k views. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 I appreciate this video and am grateful that you two are being obedient to the calling on your lives.
My Mom had a massive heart attack on the job 😢and after 20 days in a coma God called her home 🕊️🙏🏾 Now I wish I could make the necessary changes 😒..............
I worked in education as well and experienced many of the same things. For years I changed jobs and school districts thinking a different environment would make a difference. It never did and only got worse. The summer before my last academic year was a build up of anxiety and the weekend before I had to return August 2021, I felt physically ill. I knew going back was a mistake, but if I left, I would be abandoning my contract which could affect my educator certificate. Needless to say, it was the worst year I'd had in 15 years and much of it had to do with the principal allowing others to make decisions about my position without any discussion. I literally had to read the school handbook to see all of the extra "jobs" that had been tagged on to my already busy position. My exit plan was simple. I wasn't going to sign another contract with that district or any other. I let them know as soon as we received letters of intent in January when most people wait until contracts are given in March. I didn't have anything figured out other than selling my house so I could move and have some time to figure things out. The best decision of my life! That year pushed me trust God like never before.
The HOLYSPIRIT told me that we black people need to use our minds to make money. He said we are BRILLANT and the best thing he created. He said the black woman is his 👑 CROWN, his QUEENS. I always wondered why the world gives us a hard time, its because the enemy knows we are GODS CHOSEN PEOPLE. He said jobs are a curse that not many escape and the reason why many die. He said fear is what keeps us on those plantations. God Bless
As a black female educator, I can definitely relate on all aspects. I have experienced so much micro aggression and prejudice in the workplace. I have sat and listened to white educators diminish young black boys then punish me for speaking out on their behalf. No one supported me. The system is designed to continually suppress black women and keep their mouths shut. I need to find a way to live out my passion without restrictions and constraints.
I’m 29 and I really want to take a career break. I work in a very fast paced environment & for the past few months or so, I’ve noticed that my breathing is very shallow because I’m on the cusp of a panic attack. I am unmarried and have no children, and really want to take a sabbatical and just quit my job.
I left my job after 19 years. I had an hour commute each way to work, I worked 40 hours plus in an office, I was on standby with my phone, laptop and tablet expected to respond when called upon regardless of the time of day. I used all of my knowledge, education, skills and abilities to devise an exit and I left at 48 years old. I took 3 years off to do or not do what I wanted, but I was not employed. I am back in the workforce I work 2 days remote and 3 days in the office. I earn slightly less, but I have much more balance in my life and I'm happy that I chose me.
Great Video🖤I am 58 years old🖤I worked on my job for 25 yrs🖤I hated it🖤I stayed,because I was a single Parent🖤, also FEAR🖤 that was the worse GHETTO Place I ever seen in my life🖤I was so unhappy, My hair stop growing 🖤I dressed everyday like a bomb too fit in🖤I retired 2021🖤I am happy too see most of our younger Generation isn’t letting Fear stop them🖤Sherry Chicago 🖤
I can relate to a lot of things you are saying but when God delivered me!!! I couldn’t believe it was real.. He has greater things for you praise God!!!
I had five surgeries in the 15 years I have been at my job. My mental health suffered and I am still going through it. I am currently not at work and figuring things out! But I know I will!
Very powerful. I'm retired now, but I have walked away from several jobs without having another job because I figure I could always get a bad job, I don't have to stay here. I always had confidence that I would be okay. The last toxic job I had, a week after I quit I ended up in the emergency room. I made up my mind to retire then and I have never looked back. Thank you so much Stephanie and your guest is fantastic.
These stories are so helpful in the sense that each black woman's experience is shared and I no longer feel alone. However, I don't occupy a degreed position and most of the women possess degrees and have done exceptional things but that is not my story. As usual, I am on the outside looking in...getting a view of the mainline career types but no one speaks to black women who are simply women in the non-degreed fields. We work hard too. We are dishonored too - perhaps more so as our fields are not considered as important as those where higher education was procured. Would just like to see a more well rounded addressing of "all" black women across the board. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read my post. 🕊
This whole interview is 100% FACTS! I've experienced this at almost every company I've worked for in my career. It's sad and does something to your soul, especially when you are reprimanded for things that aren't your fault and not given credit for your work or knowledge...You did right by leaving...No company deserves your soul...Congratulations to you..💯💝
I'm dealing with a toxic workplace. I've stopped complaining about it. I had a biopsy, and my 1st thought was I could get off if I was sick. That was a wake-up call. I don't sleep on Sundays nights/Monday mornings, because I'm dreading the week. Doing anything feels like I'm treading through syrup. I'm constantly masking. I have no energy for the rest of my life. I'm on ADHD meds. Now my friend has stage 4 cancer. I wish we would've spent more time having fun. Life is short, we have to get this happiness while we can.
This is so true for me as well. As a healthcare professional who has been in the field for 32 yrs and i have had enough. I used to get literally physically sick. My body was telling me to leave. Mental trauma, workplace bullying, and more. PLus anything that pulls you away from God it is not good. It was draining.
Kudos. That was an amazing conversation! After my 38-year corporate America career ended after a major downsizing, I was definitely done done. I had no energy to even ponder resume prep or interviewing. I’m now enjoying retirement and sharing my gifts as a volunteer supporting my community. Thank you for this wisdom and love. 💞
So funny you said that because my spirit won't allow me to update my resume.🤣 I get exhausted just looking at the job postings with the laundry list of expectations!!
Ladies, build build your own businesses, schools, health care orgs.,service org., COMMUNITY!!! Got enough Churches... Heal and invest in your own. Peace
It hurts me so much to even say this but how hurtful is it when the toxic job and toxic employer is another Black woman. So much of this is relevant and I struggle with leaving because it is a Black woman.
I got over that quickly after I was a supervisor at a call center. All skin folk ain't kinfolk. Unfortunately, a lot of black women are in full competition mode and always think someone wants their man. Even though, I showed no interest in their men, and they also get really high school petty over looks. Being very attractive, they were always nasty to me. I would have to tell my team, I didn't want nothing they had personally! I am very blessed with the family I have. About 6 months after being let go, the anger finally subsided. If I see some of these ladies out in public, I speak and keep it moving!
It's 5:40am, I'm a Therapist for an organization and the people I work with have become so toxic that I can't possibly stay employed there, I'm actually dreading going to work. It's scary that these people are in charge of other people's mental health, but cause hell for their coworkers. I have also experienced the ignoring of my emails and just blatant disrespect. It's time for me to focus on my own mental health and resign soon. I'm not married and have no kids, so the move should be easy, but I'm still not sure why I'm hesitating. I also have a side business making Jewelry, so I could easily live with my mother who lives alone and sale my jewelry for a while. Thank the Most High for a supportive mother, who's encouraging me to leave. 🙌🏾
This was so goooooood!!! I feel like marching down the hall, kicking my boss' door in and yelling "I QUIT"! Exit Strategy Mode has been activated! I've got a pep in my step.
I gave notice to my toxic job a couple of weeks ago, but unfortunately not before I ended up in intensive care with Type 2 diabetes. I stayed lo gee than I had planned to. So I quit and am moving to Paris. Lots of unknown, but I feel free and hopeful.
I retired in July as well, but I did leave with the benefits and pension amount I wanted and was publicly honored, which was nice to after 30 years. But my experiences are very similar, including not telling my mother. I am still recovering from working for years, as a professional in the school district as well. I never missed it or looked back one day !
My God, I am so Thankful for this video. I am in corrections (17.5 years) and it is so toxic and has gotten worse. I DREAD going to work. I have trouble sleeping, headaches, body aches, anxiety, when I think about going to work and when I’m getting ready. I just wonder why I keep going back if it makes me feel this way. When I’m away on leave I feel so much better. For so long I have wanted to resign, but as mentioned how will the bills get paid, what if something happens when I quit. I’ve been Praying for a sign from God to move. Amen Ladies.
Great video Stephanie! There’s so much I want to say on this topic! I want to be free from all of it! Being strong, being silent, always going by the book, working to make ends meet and still struggle doing that, living in fight or flight mode all the time, checking to make sure my doors are locked several times before bed, etc. I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired! It’s exhausting
I do understand that same thing here, but you(we) were created from Love by Our Heavenly Father! We need to focus more on his LOVE for our existence and not what people think or we think our lives are to be. Peace and Blessings to you all.
Most people are insecure, lazy, and immature. That is how the masses are controlled. I'm so very proud all of the women who have taken that step. We are important. We are worthy. We are valuable. We deserve happiness and appreciation. We deserve respect and recognition for our dedication while being an ASSET to someone else's dreams.
For me, it's not the job it's the people. It's the micro Aggressions and bullying and discrediting.
Right sister, my bullying is in my face!!! Being the only black, it trickles down to me!!!! I just don't have anything saved and the benefits are good. Department of Corrections as an officer!
Yes! This 👆its the people, especially those in leadership positions.
No wonder there are active shooters now at the work place.
@@borngreat-4-life930 yeap because of work place bullying.
Basically.
I walked off my job one day with out giving notice. I went into work early that morning before most people even arrived. I sat at my desk and didn’t even take off my jacket. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I just got up and walked out. I never said a word to anyone. I went home turned off my phone and went back to bed.
Holy smokes.
This sounds so beautiful!!!
❤
Yeap
@getwithit961 I also quit my job on spot. I couldn't take it anymore and walked out afternoon after my lunch break. Best decision of my life!!!
I quit my job today. I just couldn't take the disrespect anymore. Being used to train others and then watching them get employee of the month. Never being given credit because I'm black. I said that's it.
I feel and experienced you pain 😭🥺😭🥺.
Damn, sorry that happened to you. At least you had sense enough to end the disrespect.
Good for you!
I'm proud of you dear.
That happened to my bff a few months ago. They kept promising her a fairy tale position and never came through. I was so glad she finally left and now being paid more.
Call it what it is, racism and bullying on the job and Black women experience it more than any other race and thank you so much for addressing this issue because we suffer more health wise, stress, high blood pressure, fibroids, anxiety, and depression.
That sums it up perfectly sis
I just wrote that and looked up and saw your post. They need to fight all over again.
Yes, because of fear of your abilities. It's sad. I even had a teacher that tried to fail me and when that didn't work, her and her sidekick lied on me. Followed by withdrawal from school.
I quit my very toxic job last May 13, 2022 as a Program Manager. That job put me in a VERY dark place and deep depression. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder during my time at that job and still battling it.
I still haven’t found a job but I’m in a better place now and don’t regret the decision I made. I probably should’ve made it sooner.
Don’t ever let a job cost you your peace and/or health. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
I just resigned from my job last Tuesday January 17, 2023 at 10am CST. It had to be done. I got a new opportunity and I want it. The system is just so toxic.
I haven't told my family yet because I didn't want to be talked out of it.
I want to grow and save myself. I'm 55 and I have only one life.
You did the right thing!!
I left my toxic job on 1/30/23 and I’m also 55 y.o. My husband knows and he was pissed 😤 but he quickly came to realize how traumatizing the job was for me. My mom or other family do not know because I am not trying to hear “the speech”.
Right behind you. Thank you.
I lost my job on Feb 17th because I wouldn't get on her team. Crazy that I'd convinced myself that I had finally, after so many jobs I got the one. Here I am at 55 with no income. Just told my kids, didn't want to be judged. One knows and didn't when I told her why, the other doesn't know yet. Blessings to all on this feed. My anxiety and ptsd kicks in when I have to apply for jobs.
Illinois
The job is not toxic and the work you perform is not toxic. What’s toxic is the supervisors and upper management who are toxic. They have issues and are toxic and need to get help.
Agreed. I love my coworkers and clients but upper management is so toxic and crooked.
My breaking point was when I was terminated while on medical leave for late-stage cancer. I was loyal to that company. I worked 12-16 hr days. When the white co-worker broke her leg after falling over her dog, they bent over backward to accommodate her by giving her the option to work from home including having IT come to set her up. I was diagnosed and treated for late-stage cancer, and I was terminated. I still have PTSD behind that.
That's devastating. Something similar happened to me. I am so sorry.
How could something like this happen?
Are you filing a lawsuit?
@@mariesevere8864 In white America?? Easily.
@Sabrina Thomas It's been 15 yrs. The reason for termination was I exhausted my FMLA.
Been there, after 17 years in Corporate, resigned without a job, and it was my BEST decision EVER.
So many women are crippled by too much financial debt to consider quitting. We must have that conversation.
This 💯
Yes this is why I stay, but for me, I was laid off from one toxic job, I go get another one and it's toxic to, I was hoping after this last one could find me a fully remote position because for me it's never the job it's always the people on the job, I'm a black women with autism and it is always a struggle for me to fit in and normally people will use this against me, so this new job is hybrid so I'm thinking 🤔 oh I can handle 3 days with co workers boy was I wrong, these people have been bullying me to no ends, leaving information out, from refusing to sit by me as if I have disease, pure disrespect, I know I need to go but I need the money and medical insurance , because due the last toxic place, I have medical issues
Walked out last week from a toxic job, just couldn't do it anymore, worked the the 3rd shift and had no support from management I needed help with cargo mainly a forklift driver to help put cargo on this Giant ass x-ray machine....these men would flat-out refused unless it was something they needed screening. Well I complained to management and it feel on deaf emails, texts, lol anyway I finished my shift one night and never went back, now they want to text me, call me...I'm not answering 😤😆
I'm done convincing EVERYONE. Even myself.
I've only been back in the workforce for five years (after being a wife+stay @ home parent for 14yrs) & I'm GETTING OUT.
End of story.
I've applied for equestrian schools, working as a park ranger, water/ocean conservationist.
This is all to prepare me to move abroad with skill sets that will help me live more in nature.
I NEED to live closer to the sun & nature. My literal life is depending on it.
We can all do this; no matter how different or similar our goals may be.
Remember, baby steps are still steps.
Breathe Black Women while we get FREE! For all good things FLOW UNTO ME!
Asé✨
just a kind warning - black women please please save yourself the trouble and don't be an activist/community organizer for a living. it's the most draining thing ever -- unless you come with a cape that is non-flammable. burn the cape lol, it's not worth the damaging effects on your mental, spiritual, and physical health.
All marching/muling, didn't even benefit BW! It benefits BM to the point that no one cares about our femicide rate being at every 4.8 hours. All of the criminal justice warrior-ing, only put criminals back in our predominantly black neighborhoods, to terrorize the community. We read these horrible stories about BW&kids being un-alived by BM. People ask "Why was he let out early etc etc?" This the thanks we get.
Agreed
I left my government job a year ago to be self employed. I planned and saved for over a year and am now thriving in this season of softness and deep rest. My job wasn't toxic per se but it was exhausting and dysfunctional. I'm so glad I left! God provides and I now am happy, healthy and hopeful in ways I've never been. Give yourself permission to forge a new path for yourself.
Thank you so much for sharing the light in the other side of things Jenna. I’m so glad for you. 💗
YES!!!! Love this quote "Give yourself permission to forge a new path for yourself."❤
I was seriously sitting here thinking, but my job isn’t toxic and not “that” exhausting, however, it is exhausting and in my opinion, dysfunctional. I’ve literally said that I feel so bad that I’m not appreciative of my position because I prayed for one that would simply give me some room to breath throughout the day. I have breathing room and more, but it’s just not enough, anymore. I’ve recently received a life altering diagnosis and I keep saying, this is happening to get my attention. I’m ready to resign today and just figure it out, but I’m really concerned that walking away will create more stress in my life and exacerbate the diagnosis. Another concern is I’ve felt this way about most of the jobs I’ve had and I’ve had plenty, so I feel like I’ve allowed the stress to compound over the the years and now I feel like I’m going to die on the job. The sad thing is I’m a Health and Wellness Coach who works in employee wellness for a large government agency and I feel like I’m lying to myself and my colleagues about the wellness interventions I’m encouraging them to do. I do feel like the interventions actually saved my life but because I probably would’ve been dead if I wasn’t practicing them, so that’s my only hope in continuing to share these interventions.
God indeed provides exceedingly abundantly when following His will and plan. I also left toxic government job at GAO. Congratulations!
Wow, good for you, love. I'm trying to do the same. Your statement gives me hope. I have a government job as well! I'm so over it.I've been here for 8 years smh. Deep sighs ....Keep me in prayer! Thanks 🙏🏾
I worked for 21+ years in the most toxic environment on earth, prison. The last 4 years, I left twice in an ambulance. But I was trapped in my career. I worked there most of my adult life, and didn’t know how to start over someplace else.
Thank God I was close to retirement. I crawled to that pension and never looked back. I moved out of state, take sabbaticals as needed, and will NEVER work for anybody ever again! Book coming soon.
Oh my! I would definitely buy it! Sorry you went through so much agony! God bless you emensly🙏🏽
I understand. That was me. I hated that job for 8 years. Started having panic attacks there. I knew I had to leave. Watching many folks die in their 30’s and 40’s.
Worst place only suits white race that job.
Wow.. glad u got out of hell
When friends and family tells you to stay in a toxic job or relationship they are expressing their own fear.
If you look at their lives they are probably living a lie in a long relationship that's drowning them but they are too afraid to make changes. It's best not to tell them. Just tell them when you have moved on .
Just say better opportunities have come your way and you have moved on. Life is about change and growth.
If it's a toxic relationship just say " I've given it all I could and it's taking a toll. It it's time treat myself well" .
Eileen, you are so right! People think you are crazy if you want to leave a lucrative job. They don't understand that money isn't everything nor what one goes through. If you're dead or acquire debilitating depression or illness what good is money?
Facts!
Don't tell them anything dear. Don't let them know your next move. Keep it in wraps for your own safety.
I am having difficulty forgive myself for staying at a job where I was disrespected and passed up for promotions and given difficult accounts. I can't forgive myself.
I am leaving my on Friday February 3, 2023 to my new job on Monday, February 6, 2023.
I had to leave and save me.
I took action.
Year 2023 MUST BE DIFFERENT FOR ME.
How is the new job going so far?
Were you an accountant?
I feel like companies are very aware of how black women are treated but they just don’t care. I also think it’s done on purpose as well.
I agree they know what they are doing and want to destroy BW mentally. I praise God the Lord Yeshua has my mind, they can never destroy me. Stay out of toxic environments and pray / listen to the Word of God for healing. God bless.
I retired from the Air Force after 21 years of miserable & abusive service. Made it to the highest enlisted rank but still endured disrespect, racism & belittlement. I will never allow myself to “stay” in a toxic situation again. I have PTSD & struggle everyday from the trauma I experienced in battle & from white racist men.
well i hope you heal and move on!! thank you for your service. you are in good company.. been there done that
So happy that you have retired...the healing process is no joke...hoping that you are receiving support on your healing journey.❤
Thank you for your service. I can relate to your experience. I served in the military as well.
Sister, please know that can release that stress...a little bit at a time. Do all that you can to release it so that it's not bottled up inside. Your health depends on it.
So sorry for what you endured. I’m am glad you are making a new life for yourself and pray that God helps you with your trauma ( you may need to go to counseling, if so find a blk female, if possible). I wish you success in your new life, remember hope is a good thing and age is irrelevant. God bless and thank you for your service 💕
I left teaching after 18 years of service. My school became so unsafe that I cried each morning before walking on campus. I literally feared what would transpire during the school day. One day I sat at my desk and said “this is your last day”. I didn’t pack any of my personal belongings. I walked out the door and didn’t look back.
I was fortunate that I used my soft skills to land an IT contract job. I am healing each day, but I still feel the remnants of the trauma I endured as a post-pandemic educator.
Public schools especially predominantly black ones are becoming very unsafe. I believe the prison to pipeline starts at home. It's not the teachers job to raise the kids, or break up fights and get cussed out all day. At one time we black folks respected teachers and made our kids "Mind" and behave at school. Nowadays, we see black moms on social media saying stuff like " I am going to kick a teachers azz if they tone is wrong talking to my child etc" Like they are proud to fight the teacher and set horrible examples for their kids. My grandkids don't go to public school. Thank God! As a collective, Black parents, are failing their kids in home training.
@@hotcarmel12 I agree. There were too many times when I was confronted and even bullied by Black parents. My car vandalized, things stolen from my desk, Zoom bombed and cursed out, and even being followed to my car after school by an irate parent with gang affiliations. The list goes on and on. And I hate to say it, but the abuse I took from my own people was part of the reason for leaving.
Same here, but I worked at a special needs school. It was the only one in the district that would accept students with severe mental illnesses. They were violent, and honestly we weren’t capable of teaching a class with an individual who could literally destroy the room, or self harm or harm us. But we were still expected to try and teach.
@@JayKennedy101That must have been really challenging. I can empathize with your experience. And I’m glad you are safe and no longer subjected to that danger. ❤️
@@kamilah4love and this starts in PreK now! Can you believe it? I saw a little PreK boy kicking the principal of a school I once worked at.I’ve witnessed parents cursing out and threatening teachers in front of their kids ( the parents kids) I don’t blame the teachers for walking away. It’s really getting worst, especially in black communities. I fell bad about saying this but they have the worst behavior issues.
I have had a TIA stroke getting up to go to work, and got fired because I got sick. I have left another job and went straight to the hospital with blood pressure above 200, with blood vessels that snapped in my frontal lobe. I have worked a job where I was yelled at and harassed and every Wednesday I was sent to a meeting with managers and emotionally abused me. So, now I am working my own job as a travel advisor....much better.
My wake up call: there were many and the last straw was my Latina supervisor telling me that her team doesn’t want to work with me. I aways thought that I didn’t care what people thought of me as long as I’m doing my job well and I’m getting paid.
I was the only specialist who wasn’t promoted after at most 2 years- I had been working there for 4+ years!
Just recounting this brings a heaviness on my heart 😢
This touched me as a healthcare worker. This whole nursing journey has been traumatic and I feel like I am losing myself at just 32.
I hear you Sis! My hope is that you connect to supports so that you reconnect to yourself.❤
Be encouraged. Put your health first. ❤
I’m a nurse and I literally made myself sick staying in a toxic environment. It isn’t worth it.
I work in healthcare. You ARE losing yourself. You're not imagining it nor being dramatic. GET. OUT.
@@peacefreedom4930 I'm a nurse of 30.years. Early in my career I found hospital work environment to be toxic. I left and found an area in nursing that I thrive in and it's rewarding. Look into other areas of nursing if it's truly your passion.
I’m really trying to leave mine. I love what I do. But the people are so toxic. I start feeling bad as soon as I pull into the parking lot. 😢
That’s a terrible feeling Cherlonda. Dread and more dread. I hope you make an exit plan. 💗
@@StephaniePerry I’m making an exit plan now. Giving myself by the end of February to walk away from my job and to never look back! All you ladies keep me motivated. Thank you!
@@jetaime2557 wishing you all the best, in your next phase of a new and wonderful life.. God bless
Sending you well wishes in leaving and finding a professional opportunity to do similar work in a better environment❤
Dr. Sands, you are telling my story!!! As the only black female on a technology team, I'd had enough in a male dominated financial industry. I put up with the drama of attacks, whisper campaigns, sabotage and the gaslighting for 19 years. I tried changing jobs over the years, etc. Once my youngest graduated from H.S. I totally bolted. I walked away with a big smile on my face 20 years ago! That job had me physically ill. So much anxiety starting around 6pm Sunday night I'd start tripping. Every morning I'd be on my knees crying, praying and begging God for strength to go to work. On my way in the mornings I was walking towards the building like I was going to the electric chair. I had broken sleep, stomach issues, put on meds for. Went from that to surviving an aneurysm, landing in the ICU! After that ICU stay, I made up my mind. I said to myself, first they made me ill, then wound up in the ICU, I asked myself what's next? THE GRAVE??? I had to save my own life and I did. I planned my exit, I got rid of my debt first and in 6 months I was gone. I smiled all the way on my train ride home. I have felt safe ever since. No regrets, very happy, never looked back. God has taken great care of me! He will work it out!
WOW! So happy to hear that you have liberated yourself Sis!❤️
@@liftingasweclimbconsulting Thank you sis! Yes, PTSD is real. I had not-so-pleasant dreams about that "prestigious" (they're the worst offenders) organization for about a month after.
This is my situation, trying to get to the pension. Very traumatic and toxic environment. Retiring in 5 months. Thank God!
Congratulations on your upcoming retirement Loretta. 💗
You're almost crossed the finish line! Hopefully you have PTO that you can use so you won't have as many in office days.
Praying your strength!!
Sending hopes that you are receiving support as you are approaching retirement❤
Congratulations start getting body work now so you can have endurance through the last 5 months. Massage therapy will help alot congratulations .
Congratulations. Best wishes ❤️
Sadly, my toxic job experience sounds so similar to Dr Kimani. Thankfully, after 16 years with a federal employer I took a 21 day vacation to Kenya and first time in years did not have severe GI issues. Upon return, I decided I would not return, took almost a year without pay while pending disability retirement approval. Praise be to God I was approved Nov 22 with back pay!!! Thank you and love you both!
🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Last Thursday I was preparing files, running around the office like a chicken with my head cut off, answering the phone, greeting clients that were dropping off tax documents as I was the only employee for a CPA. I thought I heard the Client that was speaking to my boss say the n word, mind you I was extremely busy at the time and was not able to stop what I was doing to listen a bit closer to the conversation. Near the end of their meeting, I heard her partner tell my boss that his grandfather was a Klux Klux Klan member, he was a good man just old school. When I asked why he did not ask them to leave his office after having made racist comments his response was "people say a lot of things". My Jewish boss sat there and listened to that knowing it was a possiblity I overheard parts of the conversation. I told him to write my check because I could no longer work for him.
I’m proud of you sis. I’m sorry you had that experience.
I'm so glad you left that bullsh&t no way I would have stayed.
Resigned on MLK holiday last week! I was a marketing director at a HBCU… 🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️ 💨💨 … my toxic boss was “fake” being nice for two weeks upon hearing I was leaving. BUT the day I gave notice, he upgraded my job to a VP position and 13k more than I made, and POSTED IT ON INDEED while I was still sitting at my desk. I never went back.
☹️😣 Omg that is horrible and evil
I resigned from a toxic environment that I stayed in for almost eight years. The environment was toxic from day one. I stayed because I was a single mom and the provider for so many people.
I'm dealing with a very condescending and passive-aggressive manager. This week has been very rough for me. I know it's time for me to bounce, and I will soon. Thank you for the encouragement!
I hope this conversation was helpful to you Geri. 💗
@@StephaniePerry Yes, indeed it was! Very helpful!
I feel like that's the worse because it's hard to prove. It's hard to complain about the microagressions; the condescending, passive aggressive behavior because it's like they know how to backtrack and make it look like YOU'RE the problem. But it's still toxic and completely disrespectful to be on the receiving end of such treatment. Hope you can bounce soon!
Sending you words of support Sis...I SO know what this is like.❤
@@jennajewert Yes, this is what I'm conflicted with. I've made up my mind to not even counter his foolishness. Instead I'll focus on putting my energy into taking the steps to leave! Thank you for understanding!
I’m happy to see sisters talking about this disease of toxic workplace that affects black woman-this is a real issue, indeed! Happy for the movement!💯💜
I was recently terminated as a result of retaliation against me. The environment was severely toxic, traumatic and abusive. The abuse was implemented by a black manager, under the instruction of a white director. It was literally hell. My faith and beliefs sustained me. Although the termination was hurtful, I walked away with my peace of mind.
I personally realized that my now former workplace was toxic when I faced the fact that there was an intentional, concerted effort to thwart my professional growth. When it got to the point that I was taking an Excedrin Migraine before going into the office, I said ENOUGH. I left the end of November 2022, and with excellent references, from my immediate supervisor, the CEO and the director of HR, as well as the former office manager of the department who was a mentor to me. I could tell my supervisor was pained that I was leaving. He invited me out to lunch a week after I left. He said all the right things...but too late.
Congratulations on recognizing and taking action when enough was enough!❤
@@liftingasweclimbconsulting Thank you. This conversation feels like...home. A safe landing spot.
@honeybrown1997. I’m glad that you & so many like you are making your ways out of Toxicity & Madness. And I’m glad you got the “papers” & references you’ll be needing to press on. Someone TOLD me this about 2.5 decades ago & I only understood part of it then-there ARE people who have no other “real”reason to live without being able to look down on & to dole out mistreatment to whomever they see “fit” to mistreat. In fact, they get a rush of satisfaction every time they do so. It’s an unfortunate fact of life for most of us-even those who’ve never played in to the stereotypes of “shiftless, lazy, thieving, sly, etc., etc.” Maybe more correctly, ESPECIALLY if you don’t. Because of course, there has to be a reason, a justification for deeply-held beliefs in the inherent inferiority of other people. If you don’t (or can’t) give them one, it only motivates more hostility, rather than concession. That’s how my experience shaped-out anyway.
I wish you & all the Ladies of Comfort & Ease more than your rightful share of it! I’m pretty certain you’ve earned it! 💖🏝👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Watching this at 3 AM on a Sunday, dreading going into work.
Been there! Black Girl Burnout is real. Remember who you are.✨
The fact that black women go through this is a SHAME!!!
Denied vacation time while others who don't look like me they get have all the time off they want. And this needs to change.
Just resigned from a toxic, hostile environment this past Sat. and I don't have the new job lined up. Just couldn't go one more day!!
I'll be going to Costa Rica in May for a month scouting for a place to retire.
Thank you for this platform and for bringing your calling to fruition.
Thank you for leading "Black" women to liberation!!👏🏾
The HOLYSPIRIT, told me jobs are a Curse that not many escape. He said we so called black people are the greatest thing he created, he said we are Brilliant and that's how we were able to invent so many things. The Lord said going to a job is a choice but Fear is what keeps people on them. He said we black people need to use our mind to make money. The Lord has my sister and I making plans for our business, he said he already have customers waiting on us. He told us to EXECUTE. He also said he wanted us to help take his people to the spiritual PROMISED LAND. JUDAH is about to RISE. God Bless
The Lord told me the Jobs are responsible for the death of many people.
I resigned too back in sept no job lined up! Then finally landed a job right before christmas. Its manageable but definitely reminds me of why i dont need to deal with anymore jobs! Too controlling! Time to break free!
@@andreanalife my sentiments exactly! No more someone else's 9-5!
@Shanteria I got the chills reading your post! You are so on point. The workforce is just another form of bondage that The Most High delivered us from. It's like when the slaves were "freed," some stayed because they couldn't see a way to survive. Granted, they were left with nothing. However, we are a gifted people. We know how to make something out of almost anything!
We're waking up and walking into our purpose! We are royal people! Nap time is over!!
I no longer choose to be a part of the rat race or run on the hamster wheel!
By the way I came out of an 11 yr nightmare this past June and jumped right into hell and stayed 7 months and jumped right out.
Let's go melanated people!!
Sometimes when you’re at the toxic job fighting for your pension…..you may not live to see it. I see it so much at my job working 16hr days sometimes 24hrs. It’s not worth it. My job has caused me to be disabled. Ladies save yourselves. You’re worthy of ease….don’t be forced into it!!!!!!
❤️
@@villcat9750 I can retire early in 3 more years. A lot of coworkers say that I should wait to get full retirement in 11 year. My response has been, I won't make it to that age if I stay here.
And one topic that needs to be discussed is this... why are other Black people mean to each other on the job, and why do they cooperate with the oppressive group towards another Black person? What is the pay off for that behavior? I would see it over and over again. The Blacks would work with the oppressive management against a Black woman. Just an awful look.
Yep..this has happened to me multiple times and the last time she was the token bw and I wouldn't follow her lead. I saw how she was the last one to go to lunch while training me..she just never stopped. Yet she was super smug and thought she was better than me. Long story short she went on leave for surgery and they ended up firing her because they no longer wanted to pay for her medical Leave. This was the same woman who was mad because when I came on I got a raise with everyone else because the were raising the pay for that position. For the year I was with them I used them to my benefit. I took a paid Leave and applied for a grant before they became catty with me because it was evident that I wasn't the normal token bw and I wasn't taking their bs. The Director of the unit was a light skinned bw who told me I always looked angry. I would literally be minding my own business but I realized why the unit didn't have other ppl of color on it. She was a main factor in it. She was also a token and her ways was very much similar to a prejudice white person. Before I left I told her off too..she told me I went too far but she let "her ppl" set me up and attack me. I didn't show up the next day and they let me go right before the pandemic hit America hard but after me so many ppl quit..
@Chocolate Radiance
I am so glad you got out of that situation. I have so much to say on this topic, but I will summarize my thoughts by saying I have experienced what you describe time and time again. It's like when we are professional Black women on the job, sometimes the Whites just dislike us because we are Black. Their assumption is that we are all idiots, with no knowledge and unworthy of the jobs that we've been hired to do. And with other Blacks, they often dislike the new Black person because of how the person looks or because the new person might knock them off their position of being the Black person that performs well. In other words, the Blacks see the new Black person as competition in the eyes of the Whites. As educated, professional Black women, we face a lot in the work place. I'm so glad that my friend sent me a link to this topic because I see that I'm not the only one.
The loyalty that we have given employers has destroyed us as Black Women. I am no longer committed to an employer; my mental and physical health are more important. My self-worth and value are not based on a work title, nor can I be bought with a salary. Thank you, ladies, for this inspiring conversation. Dr. Kimani is correct when she said that leaving is a process. I have stayed on my job because I love what I do! Working with older adults. The organization and site manager are unresponsive and uninvolved in the daily operation of what we do in our jobs. It's a HARD NO for me, and I'm out!!!
It is such a shame to hear that black women do not feel safe living in the US.
This conversation is SOOO relevant on SO many levels. I pray that it reaches the four corners of the world!
SHARE IT ON FACEBOOK
🇬🇧 3 years to go until retirement
I was let go from my job and the financial fear is what I'm dealing with however I'm working on launching my travel business. I've travelled to 16 countries and have a true passion for it. I'm doing my best to move past this financial fear, and overwhelming feeling of starting a business and funding it.
Gerryo Financial uncertainty is very scary, I know. Wishing you a strong income source while you build your new business. 💗
Gerry…Wish you all the blessings in your new adventure of entrepreneurship Good bless, you will do great..!😊
The Lord told me jobs are a choice but Fear is what keeps people on them. He also said they were a curse that not many escape, he said we black people need to use our mind to make money. He said we are BRILLANT and the best thing he created.
I hear you! Wishing you well wishes with starting your own business. Congratulations on listening to and following-up on your passion!❤
Rooting for you! I am also dealing with a lot of fear too.
I can relate so closely to this conversation! I left corporate career where I was in a very toxic environment. I decided to go work in education to support our children who were being left behind. I loved being there for the children but the obvious racism was palpable. The disparity is real in regards to black children. Black staff were expected to be the everything to everyone but never formally supported in their vision while the least thing their white counterparts did was exhausted. I was retirement age but know I could have continued to work. I retired. My health has significantly improved. I just don’t know what to do now. Income would be nice.
The way I have allowed myself to be devalued and disrespected at my job makes me sick to stomach because I'm allowing this for a paycheck. I'm applying out now but definitely let this go on too long
She’s hitting so many nails on the head, she can build a HOUSE!!!! Powerful interview! I’m so PROUD of Dr. Kimani 🙏🏽
Thank you @Worlds Mastery !❤
I am 76 and still grieving my profession of Social Work and Counseling
It should be a husband's role and responsibility to provide such that the wife and mother of his children can avoid toxic work environments in the first place and focus on the home and child rearing and perhaps a home based business or non-toxic remote work, if necessary. It should not be the key responsibility for a wife and mother to raise income for the entire household and too many black women find ourselves in this breadwinner role, married or not. At a minimum, it could be a shared responsibility, ideally as a family business. Consulting engagements and entrepreneurship appear to be the best options for black women to avoid the ills of the toxic work place.
Agreed..
U r so right about that
I have come to this conclusion too, a deep truth for black women, we need to be protected and provided for and supported
I really agree with you. I saw men in my family providing that shield and protection.
A BW I know never left her job on her own. It was a stroke and not being able to speak afterwards that forced her out. She applied to over 10 different jobs to move up and it never happened. The stress, racism, and microagressions destroyed her health.
It’s unbelievable we find ourselves continuously in these conditions. I feel better knowing it’s not just me. Hey sis….❤
Thank you so much for being here. May 30, 2023, I am out. I will be in retirement for sure. So much dispectfulness, liars, setting me up to fail, so much jealousy, Directors, Deputy in authority positions. The Federal Government Department of Defense hates us. I had to contact my attorney and EEO. Now, they tried to be nice to me. After 23 years, they used my supervisor, a Black man, to get at me making up lies, saying I lacked in my performance but had me training all the employees. After all these years, I had never been written up. Made up lies on the days I was out having a precedure with the doctors note provided. All these years going to work. Written up 2 months out of 23 years. They just do not want a Black Woman making 6 figures and making more then every one in the office, and I am not a supervisor. No one had my back either. So much I can say but I will end here. Thank you, ladies, for this video hats off to you both. 👏🏽 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
So true… older people would say “Stay at your job!” I get it though and I understand where they were coming from based on their generation but we have to understand that we matter too
Hello Ladies, I left my job November 2022. My mother passed in September 2022 while I was out on bereavement my supervisor called and asked me…so are you coming in? I was like thinking to myself, are you serious I just lost my mom, my best friend my heart is broken. A bell went off in my head. I was already sick of the job the people we’re so racist. I felt like I was just the token. They all belonged to the same church, Mormon, not throwing shade on anyone’s religion. Anyway, I would dread going into the office. I would have knots in my shoulder’s, crying on the way to work. While I was there I could not focus, I would have frequent anxiety attacks. The palms of my hands broke out with some type of eczema, the doctors said it was from stress.
Since I left, no more shoulder or neck pain. I can breath clearly once again.
I haven’t went back to work, I would like to find something to do that doesn’t require going to a nine to five. I’m 56 and trying to figure out my life.
Go in prayer. Talk to God, and listen for His direction. I know that it sounds simple and cliche, but God got me through 3 years of unemployment after a termination. My health improved, my bills were paid and my soul was happy. He will direct your steps.
@@alwaysblessed4980 Amen 🙏🏾
A lot of teachers, are leaving, especially the younger ones.. in nyc there is a 30 years before u get a full pension, but they are leaving in droves ( I think the Covid-19 lockdown had many teachers thinking about their mental health) their is a 1/2 million deficit of teachers in the USA after Covid…they are just leaving due to burn out, no administration support, health going downhill and depression
Poor physical and mental health care + lack of support is the recipe for disaster. I’m glad to see them leaving, and I hope even more Black women do the same. 💗
@@StephaniePerry yes so do I Stephanie.
@@StephaniePerry 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 Burn out is real. Thank you for this timely and powerful message.
This conversation is a reflection of my experience working in Healthcare for almost 15 years. I've changed organizations and it is the same behavior across the board. It is soul draining.
I’m in my late 20s and I am TIRED AND LOST. I don’t know what to do, but I know I can’t work for these companies any longer!
Checking on you a year later, how's it going?
@@queendom774 aww that’s sweet of you. I’m okay. I’m still in corporate but I’ve toughened my skin for now. My goal is still to have my own. I just inherited a house that will provide some income so that’s a start.
@@queendom774 how are you?
@@candiedsugarxo4462 wow! Okay that's awesome!!! You've got time to free yourself from toxicity, been there!
@@candiedsugarxo4462 I am good, my workplace is a whole lot better than it was, but I do need a career BREAK FAST, and I'm working on it!!! Thanks for asking!
What really gets me is the field of social work and counseling are helping professions yet a lot of times there is toxicity and bullying in these fields. It’s also very cliquish.
Yes!! I just resigned from a domestic violence organization, and the CEO is the biggest abuser!
Unbelievably remarkable in a bad way!
Certain fields are very toxic for us, because society expects us to take on a lot at work. And other blacks will try to gaslight you if you aren't stressed out or doing as much as they are doing. We have to put ourselves first and keep it moving!
So unfortunate yet so very true.
When I was in my MA in counseling program I was amazed that those toxic people were preparing to become therapists. Makes me look at therapists differently than before for sure.
My cousin is a social worker and she was unfortunately bullied but it was other bw bullying her smdh
I have almost this same story! I left my toxic job in 2021 after being ill and depressed. It was awful. Life has been steadily improving since I left. I'm about to take my first 30 day sabbatical in March!
So glad you left Sharon! Congratulations on your sabbatical!! 💗
@@StephaniePerry thank you for these videos. It's going to help a lot of women.
Same here.
@@hiddenbeauty2828 I never need to have that experience again. Freedom all day! I hope the same for you ❤️
Congratulations! YEEESSS!!!!❤
I think I'm going through the grieving stage, because 22 years of your life and you ask yourself "what have I been doing"? You start to question everything. I quit in August 2022 and I'm now I'm praying I find my purpose before my savings runs out. But its putting my faith in Yahweh to be where I'm supposed to be. I've traveled to many places but when I come back home to America I'm always in a depression I can never get out of, its time to go.
I felt that way just last year my job fired me 6months after I had my daughter & two weeks later had a heart attack!!! At 34yrs old. Yup..I have a story to tell & I'm NOT healed. This message ABSOLUTELY AB-SO-FREEKN-LOOTLY Triggered Me🤧 Where does one go from here?..with not even a pot to piss in type of place..not a STEP to step on. Where do those like us go?..Where do we start?
Honestly, I am not healed either. I have found therapy to be extremely helpful for me in processing and healing from the Workplace Traumas. Please note that two Foundations periodically provide free therapy services/vouchers for Black Women: 1). The Boris Lawrence Henson Foundation & 2). The Loveland Foundation
Hi - I received a 95% performance review as a Student Advocate. I asked my super how can I get 100%. This lady said, "You have to live and breathe Student Advocate." I never received 100% cus I refused to take work duties past the doors of the school when my work day ended! Work-Life Balance!!!!! 🤗
WOW! Smh! If you listen to that advice you would no longer be breathing.
You must not be Caucasian.
I left my toxic job today and now this pop up in my feed
I hope you're healing Ruby. 💗
I left my job last year after almost 20 years. The job in itself wasn’t toxic, but the culture was. I was on antidepressants for 7 years I was tired of the microaggressions and being spoken down to by people that take pride in being stupid. Unfortunately I picked up on the fact that some of the Black coworkers that I had were throwing me under the bus for basic crumbs on the table. I’m in a much better job with a good culture now. It is very important to create your own safe space within your job, if something doesn’t sit well and there is potential for it to bring your downfall, GET OUT OF THERE! Your well-being is more than a job.
I, too, enjoyed my work and was hoping one day they'd accept me as their equal, trying to be perfect for racists management. Working killer OT...yet they only saw me as their garbage dump for more work. During daily department calls, if I spoke my ideas or input was either belittled or ignored. After 8 months in the department, I started having numbness in my let arm. That's when I decided I had to quit, as I was internalizing the stress and pain/disrespect. First time I every quit a job! It felt great! My body even welcomed back my "monthly friend" when I thought it was done! LOL
Great. The HOLYGHOST told me that jobs are a curse that NOT many Escape. He said going to a job is a choice but Fear is what keeps people there. The Lord said we black people are BRILLANT and that's how we were able to invent so much. He said we need to use our minds to make money. The Lord also said we are the best thing he created and that we black women are his CROWNS, his QUEENS. I love JESUS, he let's my sister and I know often how special we are to him. He said he loves us so much his heart hurts. Oh, he's so precious very precious. The Lord said we are owner operators. God Bless
I started feeling numbness in my fingers and lightheaded.
I realized that I hadn't taken a lunch or break in 6 months!! Working straight through even OT!!
I am now home nourishing my body and cleaning my apartment and back to working on my art, which brings me peace & joy!
I was neglecting everything I love & everything that loves me.
Self-care is not cliché it's a real thing!! Let's take care of ourselves mind, body, soul and spirit!!
Congratulations for leaving and saving yourself!❤
When I started watching this video, it had approximately 745k views. As the video is ending it has over 920k views. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 I appreciate this video and am grateful that you two are being obedient to the calling on your lives.
Thank you Sis!❤
That’s interesting because right now it’s only at 29K views.
@@marriejames01 CZcams tends to remove views sometimes..She needs to complain
Great conversation!👍🏾 Four months to go and I’m pulling the plug…I am literally burnt out!!!🤦🏾♀️
Wonderful! Same here. I am leaving at the end of April.
I’m sorry you’re experiencing burnout Rose. But I’m so glad you’re leaving. 💗
I’m trying to do the same at the end of my school year!
I’m experiencing the samething!
Congratulations for honoring yourself!❤
My Mom had a massive heart attack on the job 😢and after 20 days in a coma God called her home 🕊️🙏🏾
Now I wish I could make the necessary changes 😒..............
I am sending condolences to you Sis.❤
@@liftingasweclimbconsulting Thank you so much! That was 25 years ago . I can't even speak on what I'm going through on my corporate job.😥🤐
I worked in education as well and experienced many of the same things. For years I changed jobs and school districts thinking a different environment would make a difference. It never did and only got worse. The summer before my last academic year was a build up of anxiety and the weekend before I had to return August 2021, I felt physically ill. I knew going back was a mistake, but if I left, I would be abandoning my contract which could affect my educator certificate. Needless to say, it was the worst year I'd had in 15 years and much of it had to do with the principal allowing others to make decisions about my position without any discussion. I literally had to read the school handbook to see all of the extra "jobs" that had been tagged on to my already busy position. My exit plan was simple. I wasn't going to sign another contract with that district or any other. I let them know as soon as we received letters of intent in January when most people wait until contracts are given in March. I didn't have anything figured out other than selling my house so I could move and have some time to figure things out. The best decision of my life! That year pushed me trust God like never before.
🙏🏾
Me too
The HOLYSPIRIT told me that we black people need to use our minds to make money. He said we are BRILLANT and the best thing he created. He said the black woman is his 👑 CROWN, his QUEENS. I always wondered why the world gives us a hard time, its because the enemy knows we are GODS CHOSEN PEOPLE. He said jobs are a curse that not many escape and the reason why many die. He said fear is what keeps us on those plantations. God Bless
As a black female educator, I can definitely relate on all aspects. I have experienced so much micro aggression and prejudice in the workplace. I have sat and listened to white educators diminish young black boys then punish me for speaking out on their behalf. No one supported me. The system is designed to continually suppress black women and keep their mouths shut. I need to find a way to live out my passion without restrictions and constraints.
I’m 29 and I really want to take a career break. I work in a very fast paced environment & for the past few months or so, I’ve noticed that my breathing is very shallow because I’m on the cusp of a panic attack. I am unmarried and have no children, and really want to take a sabbatical and just quit my job.
Do you have enough savings to take your break now?
@@denisenoles3159 I do! But I’m petrified😂
@Christiana Taylor What are you afraid of? 😊
I left my job after 19 years. I had an hour commute each way to work, I worked 40 hours plus in an office, I was on standby with my phone, laptop and tablet expected to respond when called upon regardless of the time of day. I used all of my knowledge, education, skills and abilities to devise an exit and I left at 48 years old. I took 3 years off to do or not do what I wanted, but I was not employed. I am back in the workforce I work 2 days remote and 3 days in the office. I earn slightly less, but I have much more balance in my life and I'm happy that I chose me.
I’m ready to quit and my lease is coming up in two weeks. I have no definite plans. Pray for me or send me good vibes! Thank you 🙏
Sending you love ❤ and we'll wishes🙏.
🙏🏾🙏🏾
Sending you all the love and prayers I can! I know how you feel! Something amazing is going to happen, we'll see!!
Sending you well wishes Sis!❤
You got 'em sis!
Great Video🖤I am 58 years old🖤I worked on my job for 25 yrs🖤I hated it🖤I stayed,because I was a single Parent🖤, also FEAR🖤 that was the worse GHETTO Place I ever seen in my life🖤I was so unhappy, My hair stop growing 🖤I dressed everyday like a bomb too fit in🖤I retired 2021🖤I am happy too see most of our younger Generation isn’t letting Fear stop them🖤Sherry Chicago 🖤
Stop serving the things that are no longer serving you. Great and necessary conversation. It is time to HEAL and know your worth! Tfs
I can relate to a lot of things you are saying but when God delivered me!!! I couldn’t believe it was real.. He has greater things for you praise God!!!
🙌🏾 🙌🏾
Amen!
My wake up call was the death of my 60year old sister. She spent 30 years in a very toxic work environment... Retired early and kept falling sick
I’m so sorry to hear this Doris. The dangers are real. I’m glad you’re doing things a different way. 💗
🖤
Knowing Your Identity Outside of Your Job is Golden!!!!!!!!!!
I had five surgeries in the 15 years I have been at my job. My mental health suffered and I am still going through it. I am currently not at work and figuring things out! But I know I will!
Very powerful. I'm retired now, but I have walked away from several jobs without having another job because I figure I could always get a bad job, I don't have to stay here. I always had confidence that I would be okay. The last toxic job I had, a week after I quit I ended up in the emergency room. I made up my mind to retire then and I have never looked back. Thank you so much Stephanie and your guest is fantastic.
These stories are so helpful in the sense that each black woman's experience is shared and I no longer feel alone. However, I don't occupy a degreed position and most of the women possess degrees and have done exceptional things but that is not my story. As usual, I am on the outside looking in...getting a view of the mainline career types but no one speaks to black women who are simply women in the non-degreed fields.
We work hard too. We are dishonored too - perhaps more so as our fields are not considered as important as those where higher education was procured. Would just like to see a more well rounded addressing of "all" black women across the board. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read my post. 🕊
Sis, please know that I share my story to help all Black Women as we all experience disrespect and degradation at soul sucking toxic jobs.
This whole interview is 100% FACTS! I've experienced this at almost every company I've worked for in my career. It's sad and does something to your soul, especially when you are reprimanded for things that aren't your fault and not given credit for your work or knowledge...You did right by leaving...No company deserves your soul...Congratulations to you..💯💝
I'm dealing with a toxic workplace. I've stopped complaining about it. I had a biopsy, and my 1st thought was I could get off if I was sick. That was a wake-up call.
I don't sleep on Sundays nights/Monday mornings, because I'm dreading the week. Doing anything feels like I'm treading through syrup. I'm constantly masking. I have no energy for the rest of my life. I'm on ADHD meds.
Now my friend has stage 4 cancer. I wish we would've spent more time having fun. Life is short, we have to get this happiness while we can.
I am so Happy that you are now growing in The Light of God Dr. Kimani Norrington
This is so true for me as well. As a healthcare professional who has been in the field for 32 yrs and i have had enough. I used to get literally physically sick. My body was telling me to leave. Mental trauma, workplace bullying, and more. PLus anything that pulls you away from God it is not good. It was draining.
Kudos. That was an amazing conversation! After my 38-year corporate America career ended after a major downsizing, I was definitely done done. I had no energy to even ponder resume prep or interviewing. I’m now enjoying retirement and sharing my gifts as a volunteer supporting my community. Thank you for this wisdom and love. 💞
So funny you said that because my spirit won't allow me to update my resume.🤣
I get exhausted just looking at the job postings with the laundry list of expectations!!
Ohhwweee..."done done!" Happy to hear that you are enjoying your retirement and sharing your gifts in volunteering.❤
You deserve it 💕
Ladies, build build your own businesses, schools, health care orgs.,service org., COMMUNITY!!! Got enough Churches... Heal and invest in your own.
Peace
It hurts me so much to even say this but how hurtful is it when the toxic job and toxic employer is another Black woman. So much of this is relevant and I struggle with leaving because it is a Black woman.
I got over that quickly after I was a supervisor at a call center. All skin folk ain't kinfolk. Unfortunately, a lot of black women are in full competition mode and always think someone wants their man. Even though, I showed no interest in their men, and they also get really high school petty over looks. Being very attractive, they were always nasty to me. I would have to tell my team, I didn't want nothing they had personally! I am very blessed with the family I have. About 6 months after being let go, the anger finally subsided. If I see some of these ladies out in public, I speak and keep it moving!
They are the main one's..
I am so turned upside down that I am frozen. I know all of the things I should and need to do but am frozen and it’s only getting worse.
Black men over here love this channel !! ❤❤❤
It's 5:40am, I'm a Therapist for an organization and the people I work with have become so toxic that I can't possibly stay employed there, I'm actually dreading going to work. It's scary that these people are in charge of other people's mental health, but cause hell for their coworkers. I have also experienced the ignoring of my emails and just blatant disrespect. It's time for me to focus on my own mental health and resign soon. I'm not married and have no kids, so the move should be easy, but I'm still not sure why I'm hesitating. I also have a side business making Jewelry, so I could easily live with my mother who lives alone and sale my jewelry for a while. Thank the Most High for a supportive mother, who's encouraging me to leave. 🙌🏾
This was so goooooood!!! I feel like marching down the hall, kicking my boss' door in and yelling "I QUIT"! Exit Strategy Mode has been activated! I've got a pep in my step.
I gave notice to my toxic job a couple of weeks ago, but unfortunately not before I ended up in intensive care with Type 2 diabetes. I stayed lo gee than I had planned to. So I quit and am moving to Paris. Lots of unknown, but I feel free and hopeful.
Congratulations on your new adventure. How’s Paris?
I retired in July as well, but I did leave with the benefits and pension amount I wanted and was publicly honored, which was nice to after 30 years. But my experiences are very similar, including not telling my mother. I am still recovering from working for years, as a professional in the school district as well. I never missed it or looked back one day !
Congratulations!!!! It is so liberating to not have regrets!❤
I want to cry when your son asked you if you're going back to that job 😫
The sad part for me is the person I am getting this type of treatment from is some that looks like me. Even more heartbreaking
My God, I am so Thankful for this video. I am in corrections (17.5 years) and it is so toxic and has gotten worse. I DREAD going to work. I have trouble sleeping, headaches, body aches, anxiety, when I think about going to work and when I’m getting ready. I just wonder why I keep going back if it makes me feel this way. When I’m away on leave I feel so much better. For so long I have wanted to resign, but as mentioned how will the bills get paid, what if something happens when I quit. I’ve been Praying for a sign from God to move. Amen Ladies.
Great video Stephanie! There’s so much I want to say on this topic! I want to be free from all of it! Being strong, being silent, always going by the book, working to make ends meet and still struggle doing that, living in fight or flight mode all the time, checking to make sure my doors are locked several times before bed, etc. I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired! It’s exhausting
I feel you on that!
I do understand that same thing here, but you(we) were created from Love by Our Heavenly Father! We need to focus more on his LOVE for our existence and not what people think or we think our lives are to be. Peace and Blessings to you all.
Most people are insecure, lazy, and immature. That is how the masses are controlled. I'm so very proud all of the women who have taken that step. We are important. We are worthy. We are valuable. We deserve happiness and appreciation. We deserve respect and recognition for our dedication while being an ASSET to someone else's dreams.