A Conversation with an Ex: Janet x Wes (from Wong Fu Productions)
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- čas přidán 5. 09. 2024
- Seventeen years ago, Janet and Wes dated during their time in college. While they've remained friends throughout the years, this is the first time they reflect back on their previous relationship in depth discussing everything from how they first met, to developing butterflies, to admitting the realities of their compatibility, and to the eventual end.
Wesley Chan
@thewesleychan
___
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people shipping them in the comments- Just because they have the maturity to be this vulnerable around each other doesn’t mean they have romantic compatibility. They’re literally talking about how they weren’t right for each other. Wes can say how Janet’s attractive without “flirting”
Honestly this is the perfect example of being friends with your ex and acknowledging your pasts and moving on with maturity
But this was so long ago, I feel like they grew and learned so much since then the relationship can potentially work out if they try again. I feel like I sensed that wes wouldn't be oppose of it tbh if janet is also down
Agreed birdseed, they are sharing a genuine and wholesome friendship.
2 happy persons uncoupled is better than 2 unhappy persons as a couple.
Kids are weird dw. They'll grow out and see their flaws...or not and keep doing what kids do lol
It’s so refreshing to see this in asian culture. So many of us are told by our parents that emotion and vulnerability are bad and that we shouldn’t talk about things that are uncomfortable. Thank you guys for this.
i agree with this so much
Wow never thought will find another acc that has similar name with me 🥺
@@Shiro_hedgehog ☁️🌥⛅️
I agree with how our parents discouraged expressing emotions and being vulnerable…thank you guys
Two of the most genuine, not try hard, and authentically themselves. Janet is my fave from ABG.
Wes’ body language during that breakup reminiscing hurts to watch. All of it oozes thinking back on pain and reliving that pain.
Can we just take a moment to appreciate Janet's arms 😍💪
Can't help but stare at her arms the whole damn time.
👏🏽👏🏽yesss!
Love them!
Haha I can't stop now!
They're not arms, they're guns.
Janet and Wes are two ex-lovers who turned into the best of friends through all their trials and tribulations together. That's incredibly wonderful. 💖
Janet's maturity here really shown through, props to both for having such a tough conversation!
Janet is so mature and speaks so eloquently, I can see why Wes was so attracted to her
Haha their story reminded me of my first relationship too, when you’re young you don’t think to be friends first before being in a relationship, and then you realize you’re not compatible at ALL. You’re just excited someone even likes you back. this was such a nice convo and it’s nice to see they had a healthy breakup and continue having a lovely friendship.
Good point. I liked this woman at work years ago (super cute / good looking). We became friends though I still liked her for a long time. I finally got over her. But we are still good friends. But as I've gotten to know my friend, I realize we had so many differences that we wouldn't have really been that compatible. We're good as friends but spending time together would be a challenge due to differences in how we think and preferences.
Wowwww the most mature and adult conversation about relationships i've ever seen. WHY CAN'T PEOPLE BE LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME.
And this whole time I’m like 🤔...”Wes and Janet would be cute together.” Little did I know. Thanks Janet and Wes for being open & thank you Mel and Helen for instigating this to make it happen lol (we appreciate it). Haha.
wes and janet should play we’re not really strangers
this is so fucking cute and bittersweet.
so honored that the two of you shared your story with us :)
this is like the cut's truth or drink but asian and healthy 😩👏
OMG OMG it really tugs at my heart as Wes and Janet recounted their experience and it's kinda rare to see a more forgiving version of breakup in media overall. And listening to Wes talking about the guilt and unsure of what to do really reminds me that I wasn't alone when I felt the same way after breaking up with someone, too. And Janet being so understanding and also both of you were already so caring and kind, was just a blessing to hear and to know. And to share all this with the rest of us is such a brave thing to do, so thank you! It really enriches my mind of how similar can we experience things as humans, and it really makes my feelings also more validated, and nothing else would have been able to do that. Thank you thank you for sharing so much and you guys being granted the circumstances and personality to still stay friends after so many years, that we still get to witness this conversation.
I watched this video again today. Do not know why. Just the memory is flashing in my head suddenly. Yes, it is the picture at 5:40. How adorable a couple.
This is so deep, so mature, and really wise for them to talk this out, esp as Asian people we rarely talk things through, i.e. past relationship, and becoming friend with your ex? Who would have thought that? So i think this episode is very healthy for us young adults and everyone! Bravo ABG!!!
This is such a good episode!!!! Crazy how Janet and Wes used to date now Helen and Phil are now engaged! Small world.
WHEN HE SAID SHE WAS STILL REALLY ATTRACTIVE 💔
I think they can give it another go, now they're more comfortable speaking and communicating with one another.
Are they both single? No, right?
Absolutely loved this episode!
Wes and Janet should play “it takes two”. But this video has helped me heal.
i loved this episode. Such a mature conversation especially when you transition from having a romantic relationship to just being friends. Wes' body language, you can kind of tell he still feels the guilt from the past and I love how he was open and honest about it, I also love that Janet was exactly the same. Honest and yet very respectful in her replies. Great episode :)
I’ve met Wes once during the WF tour years ago and he’s so genuine and warm in person! haven’t had the chance to meet Janet but she’s like a big sister and I love watching her short dance clips with the girls and of coz meditation videos, thanks for recording something so personal and sharing with all of us, wishing you both happiness and continue to be YOU :)
Hi again!
Hello ABG! I would like to share a cute story: I was listening to this podcast episode in the car during a trip to the beach with my husband and 14 month old son. At the end of the episode where everyone signs off by saying "Byeee!" , my husband told me that my son was waving! I thought it was cute that he can hear the greeting and wave. Thank you all for being a part of our trip and I look forward to more episodes :)
I have that kinda friendship with my first ex and I'm forever grateful for that lol, I love that we're making this normalized being friends with ex's
I didn't know they were together. But thanks for sharing your past. They both have a pretty good mindset which is probably why their relationship continued as good friends.
Thank you so much to Janet and Wes for sharing this with us! It’s clear that you’ve built a beautiful friendship with one another over the many years! ❤️
i love that she didn't have this conversation facing the camera.
I am fortunate that I was able to have a similar reflective conversation with an ex about 4 years after breaking up. My ex and I dated and broke up before apply to college, ended up unintentionally attending the same college, and at the end of college is when we finally reflected similarly to Wes and Janet here. We have since gotten married to different people and we’re both glad that each other is with the right person. So nice to see that Wes and Janet are able to look back on the memories and still be friends years later!
Dude Wes is so chill, love this guy
aw, such a deep, honest conversation🥲
wes is such a nice person
Is it just me or we need the ENTIRE version of the video !! An amazing conversation.
Not a lot of ppl are mature and sincere enough to have this kind of chat with their ex. Of course it depends on the relationship and reason for breakup, but so many ppl treat others like they are disposable, they don’t have the decency to have proper closure or process what led to the relationship ending. Not everyone develop maturity or empathy in their 30’s and beyond, so this is refreshing to see. Thanks for sharing!
We should heal from our past trauma and unsuccessful relationships before we move on to another relationship. So before getting into one that you want to build, re-evaluate if you are still holding onto unresolved issues so that you don’t project it in future relationships.
Well said! Nice name too :)
I loved this episode! All the pictures of baby-faced Janet and Wesley are so cute! Thank you both for being vulnerable and open with this conversation and sharing it with us.
They are much better people than me every picture I've had of exes are ripped up and in the garbage...
This is another "Friends" Ross & Rachel clench-my-heart moment.
After listening to the podcast episode, the insta live and this video, I can't help but think that both Janet and Wes are a really perfect match for each other. Wes seems to still really like Janet, romantically, and ironically Janet is looking for a life partner. Just get together already! Don't waste another 17 years, the friendship you've built is the best foundation for the next years together. I hope when you're both 85 and re-listening to the episode with your grandchildren that you are reminded again of your wonderful relationship together!
YASSS! You took the words right out of my mouth🙌🏼😭
Totally!!! This was such a beautiful conversation and Wes definitely still has feelings for her. Its time to take action and give the relationship another go. You have both gone through so much, yet somehow end up in similar places. A relationship together built off your strong friendship is exactly the next step. Get togetherrrrrrr!!!!!
They are a lot more mature than Ross and Rachel haha but I do agree there could be something more if they wanted to explore that
That was the cutest conversation I’ve seen Wes have ^^ also can relate due to some of my past relationships
I really wish I could have a chance to sit down with my first ex I ever had like this. We had a chance to get together to talk for a lunch a few months after she broke up with me. But my mind was still clouded about trying to get her back. I really wish I could talk to her and tell her how thankful I am for what I've learned from her and her maturity she had throughout our relationship. I was truly ungrateful and childish.
This was such a warm video. I love that they remained friends and are still able to talk about their past🥺❤️Thank you for posting this video❤️
Wow. This was really interesting. I can't even imagine being able to sit down with an ex and have it be like this. I appreciate you guys being so vulnerable...I really appreciated that yall actually talked to each other and didn't engage the camera, which would have taken away from the whole point.
Wes...I could see your visibly retreat into yourself when Janet did admit that she was hurt at that time, because you still probably feel bad and shameful and I get that...and I feel for her too, because I would have said the same thing, just being like, "it's fine...it's okay..." because I would rather be feeling so bad and sad and not bring anyone else down. She obviously said she knew you felt bad already and did not want to make it worse for you. I also respect you both as people.
I see comments about people saying maybe there will be a rekindling...? I didn't necessarily get that vibe, but if you do...best wishes to you...if you don't, still, best wishes to you both on your journeys! [So sorry for being so long winded! Argh!]
one of my favorite episodes
what a great conversation between 2 mature adults. appreciate both individuals delving into the past in such an intimate way. ty for sharing!!
bawled my eyes out during the entire episode cause the vulnerability really hits home!! thank you for doing this!!
I already listened to the podcast episode, but I love the old photos in the video! Glad I watched this as well 💛
This was such an insightful episode, thank you for making and sharing your talk! Honestly this is something I always liked the idea of doing (having an honest, open and non judgemental chat with an ex aboout past relationships without any intention of rekindling anything), I wish it was more common and/or more of a norm.
4:41 - "is it sad that I don't remember"; those were almost the same lines from Wes' short - Shell.
oooh
Why do I feel like this is a Wong fu movie about ex again 😶
She's full of empathy which is good for others but bad for her heart..I empathized
Wow this was so wholesome. I wish I could communicate this way with my ex :/ Great episode!!
Some viewers straight up weren't even born yet when they dated hahaha
what a unique and healthy conversation for us to witness ugh wow thank you for sharing!!!
This was so good. Janet, you are so mature and emotionally intelligent. Great episode.
Thank you guys too for sharing this story with us! I feel lucky to be able to hear your insights on your relationship. As someone who has never dated before, I think I got some useful tips as to what I should and shouldn't do when I'm dating someone so thank you so much! 💖
LOVE THIS😍....
One of the perks of getting older is the wisdoms that we gain from lives experiences. While we do not allow ourself to be defined by them, we can learn, mature, and become better people.
Awww this makes my heart warm. Such a good way to start my morning 🥺💖 ily
Thanks for sharing Janet. Thanks for sharing Wes. Authentic despite these types of conversations not being so easy
Thank you for sharing. It’s crazy how intertwined your lives are.
Wow, what a mature, reflective and intentional conversation! I learned a lot :)
This is a beautiful conversation. I'd dare say even healing for both of them. Even though they've remained friends, they haven't gone back to this topic in 17 years. I'm glad they've been able to maintain a friendship, and truly hope they are friends and not just friendly.
I recently found out my ex from 23 yrs ago passed away....i wish i could've had this conversation with him :(
I listened to all the episodes while driving to and from work every day and I remember there was one episode where Janet was talking about an ex and said something along the lines of "oh this is awkward because you guys know him." She also mentioned that she went to school with Phil and Wes etc... in older episodes PLUS she stated she had a short relationship in college, so I always had a feeling it was Wes (just from deduction... cause of course it's not Phil) :pppp Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing this!
“Janet, you are still....really attractive.” LOL is that Wes shooting his second shot? 🤔
That's what I thought too 😬😬
I feel like Wes felt like he was being friendzoned doubled over so hard at the end, sigh. :(
yeah surprised he went back to it, but I guess there's always a simp in Wong Fu producers haha
there's more context to this in the full podcast on spotify, they had small convo about the topic of re-dating so this was a small snippet of it
Wes doesn’t have a gf?
I had no idea they used to date omg
Wow, thank you for letting us witness and listen in on such a vulnerable conversation between you two! This was touching and I'm glad things worked out and you both have a beautiful friendship together.
Found out about Asian Boss Girl through this video (randomly popping up on my YT reco) and so grateful I did, because now I've completely fallen in love with all ABG contents! Thank you for your impact to our lives, and hope more and more people can find out about ABG!
Ps: you guys should do this type of content more often!
Janet, can't help but to notice your 💪Please do a workout video❣
This is so beautiful and I hope one day I’ll be as wise and patient and compassionate as the both of them for my future partner
That UCSD shuttle brings back so many memories
That is awesome! I also still maintain a very good relationship with my first ex gf and right now, we are just like a family. Although, she said that we won't going back together but deep down I am always want to be together with her. And up until now, I never ever have a second girlfriend ever...
Finished listening to this episode and watched their live on ig!! love the raw, genuine talk between exes
Great episode. Definitely a benchsetter in trying to normalize something that is taboo in Asian culture - putting past love in perspective. Still being friends? Now that is supremely remarkable and a testament to you guys' maturity.
😭 thank you for sharing! Your friendship is surely a unique journey. I’m kind of glad I’m not the only one that has a friendship with an ex.
Great episode ! We need to have this type of conversations more often with people who shared our lives in the past. It can be healing and insightful
really appreciate you guys sharing like this. shows that we can have positive, mature adult conversations and friendships!!
Ahhh, this was so cute and heartwarming. Thank you guys for sharing!!!
CUTE MEMORIES! ‘I was all in with you"
It's nice seeing this in video form ❤️Thank you!
So sweet. Listening to this convo sorta heal my past too. Thanks guys!!!
Friendships with exes are the strangest.
Wes totally misses her. You can always tell who is more serious by the detailed recollections
I think the idea of just doing this makes even a bystander nervous but this was kinda cute and (bitter)sweet too...
Thank you for the video but I started to cry when you guys started talking about the downfall
I had this 7 years relationship with the girl and those were the best years of my life but i dont think i would be able to talk to her knowing that the flashback of the memories will remind me its not gonna happen again , ever.
For me, love is once in a life time thing and even after 3 years of breakup.i can say i am better but sometimes it hurts so bad like the breakup was yesterday. I am sorry that it didnt work out. Im sorry that I failed and we failed but she was and will always be the love my life.
YES, been hoping you two would do an episode like this! 🙏🏼 Thank you Janet and Wes for giving us such a vulnerable conversation. You’re both AMAZING people.
This was amazing and such a great example of a healthy love to friendship dynamic. Even when he said she was still attractive, she was like, "but that's not all that matters". That lesson right there takes time to understand and take in. Wish nothing but the best for both of them 💓💓🌹
I don’t ever write any comments, but after finished listening the entire podcast, I just had to. “Right person wrong timing” is the feeling that I get from Janet and Wes.
They met when they were so young and obviously there were hiccups, and I think their romantic relationship would be so much stronger now and clearly they’re still attracted to each other
i disagree. they're not attracted to each other romantically anymore right now. they're just very mature and show deep respect for each other
Wow.... well that was something I don't think I could have done when I was your age. When I was dating I don't know If I could ever get that deep into my own feelings let alone discuss it with an ex. I tip my hat to you Wes... and also Janet for that matter. Good luck to the both of you. I wish you both happiness and joy. (Kinda weird saying to a couple who aren't together but not separate either.)
Im crying this is so pure and lovely
Thanks for your vulnerability and openness.
Love the podcast and how you run the channel! Would really love to have a vlog showing your hair and makeup daily routine cuz you all look wonderful!!!
This is so touching. Thanks for your vulnerability.
Thirteen years ago ran into my high school sweet hart. It was a great Gatsby story. Long story, short. Christmas night. Three guys each one with a kid. She never told me she had kids. Reality.
OMG. Totally unexpected. I been a Wong Fu fan for ten years, and an ABG fan after Wong Fu had ABG on a Lunch Break. Small world. Great talk "to the world" about your past relationship.
Wes is a honest and genuine dude
Janet is pretty as heck
There are times when you are young and naive, you want a girlfriend partly because you want to make the other one you really like jealous.
Such a mature conversation. Love it!
I don’t think they ever shared how long their relationship was? Janet was so cute, sharing how she went into his room and cried on their IG live. Soooo touching and sweet, and sad too. Glad they’re still friends today.
The whole episode was very vague in my view...I had wish they expanded as to why they broke up rather than say it was due to guilt and not knowing each other.
@@KaleHello I think they said it sort of fizzled and Wes still had feelings for someone else...
They said they started dating at the start of the school year and broke up around winter
@@Trulyblessed521 I see, it looks like it was just a first love. Though I am amazed that both are good friends because almost always when one breaks up with their ex, they will never be friends again.
If I remember correctly, no longer than a few months? I think they were talking over the summer (Janet was on vacation with family in China) and they began dating in the fall when school started again? Pretty sure they broke up in winter or spring? Because they said the summer break and being a part made things easier for when they came back to school the next year.
Guys, life is short. If the feelings are still there, GO FOR IT!!!
They’re so mature about this
I wonder how those photos from 17 years ago are still there.