Harvard Professor: Stop Feeling Lost & Find Your True Purpose - Arthur Brooks
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- čas přidán 29. 06. 2024
- Arthur Brooks is a social scientist, professor at Harvard University, and an author.
Chasing happiness appears to be the ultimate desire for many people, yet almost everyone struggles to understand what happiness actually is and how to achieve it. So if you speak to a specialist researcher, what does science say is the best way to actually cultivate happiness?
Expect to learn what most people get wrong about happiness, the tension between a desire for success and a desire to feel like we’re enough, whether your drive for happiness is rooted in insecurity, if external accolades actually makes us happier, what the macronutrients of happiness are, the most common life elements that people believe will make them happy but actually don't and much more...
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00:00 What We Get Wrong About Happiness
05:23 Current State of Modern Happiness
14:02 Why Faith is Crucial to Happiness
20:05 The Importance of Family & Friends
27:01 Finding Purpose in Your Work
35:43 How to Manage Your Desires
43:49 The Pleasure of Reliving Memories
51:38 Optimising for Satisfaction
1:01:48 Being Seduced By the 4 Idols
1:10:59 Why Meaning Impacts Happiness
1:23:16 Meaningful Parenting in a Comfortable World
1:26:37 Differences Between Happiness & Unhappiness
1:30:59 Why Anxiety Has Become Common
1:35:25 The Modern Evolution of Envy
1:41:25 Understand the Complex Human Experience
1:44:07 Where to Find Arthur
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Hello you savages. Get access to every episode 10 hours before CZcams by subscribing for free on Spotify - spoti.fi/2LSimPn or Apple Podcasts - apple.co/2MNqIgw Here's the timestamps:
00:00 What We Get Wrong About Happiness
05:23 Current State of Modern Happiness
14:02 Why Faith is Crucial to Happiness
20:05 The Importance of Family & Friends
27:01 Finding Purpose in Your Work
35:43 How to Manage Your Desires
43:49 The Pleasure of Reliving Memories
51:38 Optimising for Satisfaction
1:01:48 Being Seduced By the 4 Idols
1:10:59 Why Meaning Impacts Happiness
1:23:16 Meaningful Parenting in a Comfortable World
1:26:37 Differences Between Happiness & Unhappiness
1:30:59 Why Anxiety Has Become Common
1:35:25 The Modern Evolution of Envy
1:41:25 Understand the Complex Human Experience
1:44:07 Where to Find Arthur
26:00 "If it doesn't hurt your heart when you haven't spoken to your friend in a week, they're not a real friend" - I like the sentiment here, but I feel like you don't need to be in touch with your friends once a week to maintain a true friendship. We all have busy lives, and some of us go weeks or months without speaking, and then we can get together and hit it off like we saw each other yesterday.
This bit struck a nerve with me also. I'm in a similar boat with my friends as you are with yours and yet they're still the people I can turn to when I need them and they're still the people I'd like to spend a lot of time with. Sometimes life can get in the way (although, to be honest with ourselves, the only reason we don't have the time is because we don't make it a priority to have the time)
Yeah, I completely agree. I don't think I've ever had that pain with anyone except my wife, kids, and parents when I was a child.
I've had curiosity about what they're up to. They're in my thoughts regularly, but, yeah, everything else you said.
I understand the realism of seeing people only occasionally, but the other side is, if you don't have someone who you can see almost regularly, your friendship has reached a point of distance where it's at an optional status.
That realization is hurtful, and can create yearning for someone who is more present for you.
I have a couple of life long friends since childhood that I trust and doesn't matter I saw them yesterday or months ago.
Anyone else feel like Chris is listening to their thoughts and just puts out episodes precisely when you need them? Looking forward to this episode, really enjoy some Arthur Brooks
I swear to you, I thought to myself ‘I feel directionless, I don’t know what my next step is gonna be for me (career wise; as I work for minimum wage atm and need to escape that). Then I go on my phone and this is the video I see at the top of my feed! 😮.
I also genuinely just finished a clip from JRE featuring Howard bloom and he was explaining how ‘everything is connected’. So ….. yea 😶
I think we just all always need lots of guidance with everything, all of the time. Lol
I was having a conversation with my brother 5 minutes before this episode was released, about him having the ability to make small changes to have a high impact on improving his life.
Well...I just started reading Brook's book on happiness yesterday. I will be using it in one of my classes this fall. It was remarkable timing.
We're all going through life, we tend to go through similar things , there's nothing new under the sun (maybe just more modern versions )
I agree with mostly everything. But many times people don't come from a good family and for them it's very hard to understand how a family environment is important. It is my case, and it's a big turn you have to make on your head to start believing that family is a good thing after you spend 20+ years in a bad family environment. The nurture part is very defining on those aspects and it's a chain effect. If we have good families it's more likely that in the future the next generation would like to keep it that way. But it's not what I see happening, the future looks grim in this aspect.
I enjoyed it too, although I think I will pass on the suggestion of taking a 2.30am walk alone without my phone. 😂
But definitely some good take aways on the whole.
Good and bad episode, which makes me sad and I have a lot to say: I always find it amazing how Arthur Brooks hits the very center of the bullseye of the topic that is closest to my heart. And he is so polished with the right words and definitions. I'm consistently amazed... BUT ultimately his insight isn't much of a life preserver if your life isn't already successful.
Listening to Arthur is more like gaining an academic understanding of life & happiness, not an understanding of how to live. Out of "faith, family, friends, and work" I have faith, but making the other 3 healthier and thriving is the tragic odyssey of my life. I feel like I'm going to war every single day to get my life nutrients, but that day doesn't feel like it will come and I'm likely to starve. Understanding your 'idols' and 'crossing off political opinions from a list' just doesn't cut it, Arthur.
The world is competitive, we're all competing for the same jobs and we all want real connection from each other. It's HARD. There's also less connection available to go around because we're also competing with technology for people's time and attention.
I feel MW is difficult to listen to because I'm a struggling dude and every guru is so successful in life nutrients. Where's the guests where things didn't work out so perfectly in the end? Where's the guests where they actually know male (or female) relatives or coworkers that are lonely out of their minds with no obvious problem to point a finger at? I'm dead serious here. If you want to keep calling the show "Modern" wisdom then I think you need to have people who actually live in the modern world without being insulated from the unique features of it. People who don't themselves have as large of a cushion of life nutrients, or who have close relations to someone without that cushion.
I agree with all your points .
The cushion of family and being loved properly by your parents I think is the biggest factor towards increased happiness ability.
People who say “money doesn’t matter so much “- that’s ridiculous . They have never been truly poor. The comfort of money can help a great amount when you have no comfort from family .
Arthur looks very healthy and energetic, especially if he's 60! Inspiring, and does make what he's saying seem more worth listening to - he walks the talk.
Healthy and balanced guest. Sound...normal advice...community, transcendence. All the things our ancestors taught us😊
Would you give your life for your parent's life?
Chris: Yes, but I would be in a lot of trouble for it.
My two points in my life where I was experiencing depression was when I'd invested and sacrificed a lot to be very good at something I was very passionate about and nobody was hiring me to do it.
what changed?
- "If you get married and have kids you WILL be happier. It's the data."
10 minutes later
- "60% of husbands say their bestfriend is their wife. 30% of wives say their bestfriend is her husband."
A very happy existence indeed.
🤔
It is not necessarily a good thing for your wife or husband to be your best friend.
@@Namelbmert that's my point. Married men are not having such a good time, so he can't say we'll be happier married with kids.
@@paulogorris18 the problem imo is that our conception of being with our significant other often includes pushing others away and being in our own little world in our own little family unit. When our most natural way of thriving is in a tribal setting. We're not meant to be isolated on a daily basis. Children are better off having multiple resources for getting their needs met and for guidance. And parents are happier and less stressed when their kids can go to someone else who actually cares about them (not just a paid stranger) when they're busy. So basically the single family home makes people unhappy especially when you dont even know your neighbors. If its not obvious by the fact that growing up in a sprawling suburb and being car dependent is a dystopian nightmare. Especially when kids dont hardly go out on their bikes alone anymore (partly because cars are dangerous) so they also become car dependent. Our entire society needs better city planning if they want to optimize for happiness. Instead they optimize for profit so.. 🤷🏻♀️
Your solution?
“And all I want for you my son is to be satisfied.”
"If you get married and have kids you WILL be happier. I have the data."
What he misses here is that it's not really anti-marriage rhetoric or philosophy that's stopping people from having kids, it's something way deeper. Most guys hypothetically want to have a wife and kids, but solitary life is becoming way too comfortable with all the technology we have now. Both men and women's standards are going up, on top of hypergamy and the lack of social pressure to settle down. We all know the usual incel spiel, but what all of this ultimately means is that even if a dude is able to start attracting women, there's little incentive NOT to just run through them.
I'm seeing early 20's girls saying they HAVE to date guys in their late 30's or older to find someone who's even remotely interested in settling down. I feel like that wasn't around 10 years ago. And if you're a woman over say 32, what guy given the choice would risk a geriatric pregnancy? It's really sad and messed up and I think it will be the downfall of our species. I wonder if creatures like us have evolved before on Earth, but after a few millennia they just download themselves into quantum foam or something and they vanish from the fossil record.
Marriage and kids are definitely NOT for everyone.
Indeed, as you said, going single is becoming quite viable as a strategy (or at least not getting married/having kids), as it lets you save up money much more easily, and have a chance to secure a decent retirement. Otherwise, just the freedom to live as you please is quite attractive, as is the peace of mind that solitude offers. With multiplayer games about, and things like Discord, it's easier than ever to enjoy a "night with friends" from the comfort of your own home. And, for anyone not inherently attractive/charming, dating can be tough work, and often not really worth the hassle.
@@TheFuzzicianexactly what he said. You have to actively go against the animal brain, in order to achieve happiness. All of the things you said about going the easy route is what is keeping everyone so unhappy.
I know 32 is considered geriatric, but I think as long as they are healthy, they do just fine. my mom had me at 37, and my older sister had kids at 37 and 39, both healthy... it is true that health issues are more and more common though.
the point of his 3 questions was to really narrow in on what you're here for presently. I doubt many would say, eh I just wanna play video games and watch porn... or would they? I don't know I'm out of touch with the younger generations to some extent. many of the new kids at my company start talking immediately about gender... and I feel like that's not that important.
Well the egyptians were certainly advanced... now they are foam... I like it.
@@JSiracusan unfortunately statistics would prove otherwise. The rate of problems with pregnancy go up significantly. Not to mention problems with the mother, but malformations with the children as well.
I know what the stats say. However, living life in accordance with stats is severely limiting. Why would anyone get married? Given 50/50 outcome?. And there are things you can do to limit risk in marriage... no guarantees... and things you can do to limit risk in having children. And physical health of the parents is a huge one. Hopefully you see what I'm saying... generally yes, specifically, not necessarily.@frontierlandfrank5314 @@frontierlandfrank5314
I listen to your show almost every day and it helps me so much, Thank you!!
Dang this guy is so articulate 👏
Love the episode, continue the great work, love the guests everytime!
This is great, definitely a rewatch
Hi Chris! Fantastic episode. Arthur Brooks articulate stating of eternal truths is a balm for the soul. If you'd like to sample his daily regimen of spiritual nourishment, take in a Catholic mass. The trick is to find one done properly and reverently by a priest that genuinely loves what he does (not always true, sadly) Fortunately it looks like you have quite a few options. A friend from Austin recommends St. Mary Cathedral downtown w/ Father Daniel Liu, St. John Neumann in Westlake w/ Father Dean Wilhelm, or St. Vincent de Paul w/ Fr. Tom Reitmeyer. Go and sit in the back and take it all in. Just watch. Much of it won't make sense at first, but that's okay. No one's going to bug you or ask why you're there.
This is an excellent episode! I love applicable lessons.
Happiness is a byproduct of a job well done.
After I started to listen to this podcast I've become more neurotic as I was befour despite not being ill intentioned
Thank you so much Chris for everything you do. This was beneficial. I'm listening to this all the way from India.
Let's thank Arthur for putting special effects on video
Great video ! Love hearing Authors insights and enjoy the great questions you ask. This has to be one of the best CZcams channels on this app! Keep up the great work Chris!
Been enjoying episodes with Arthur a lot. Thanks for this one, Chris!
Energizing and insightful. He took a lot of risks here and it worked out well imo
Wow. Great episode.
Macro nutrients of Happiness:
Enjoyment
Satisfaction
Meaning
Even we are successful financially and materially if what we do has no meaning and helpful to people some won't be truly happy I think. I like the term what is your IKIGAI?
This content is very helpful/useful 👍.
Great questions, Chris!
Chris, you are absolutely smashing it with the guests and the topics right now!!
This is FREAKING amazing!! I've already forwarded it to 10+ people and my sis is buying your book. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!!!
Looooved this one. One of your best guests!
I was just watching a bunch of videos with this dude in it, this episode came out at the perfect time
What a conversation! I sadly enjoyed this:):)
I didn't know the guest and I wasn't sure if I was going to watch, so I just clicked, and I heard the first line from him... dang. now I'm going to have to watch the whole thing. Thank you for your incredible content as always Chris 🙏
Well enjoyed that
Amazing video. They always are but this one really hit right. Thank you both Chris and Arthur
No, I think striving for meaning creates more anxiety than it resolves. This is a immense world with "everything, everywhere, all at once". It's impossible to comprehend its (or your) meaning, unless you want to claim omniscience.
The definition of working class and middle class differs between the US and the UK and it's funny to see that in the convo without the parties being aware of it.
the question is when Chris's future wife asks him to be home more what does he do? Say no, and she's in her place, but may ditch you for it, say yes and you've lost your mission and she may ditch you for it. That's a tough one and it's not just that.. it's like parental leave and much more to navigate.
One thing I've heard on multiple podcasts lately is that, oh yeah , people in the past didn't have that problem, therefore they must've been happy. one example was that widows in the past were happy after their men died, to counter the point of the man saying that women hit the wall and want a man. In this case, that older men didn't have envy before phones and must've been happy in their bubble... I think that is very much speculative and probably just a half truth if that. The older people in my life were not any happier, both men and women. They were just who they were with their own struggles sometimes happy and sometimes not. Does being enlightened mean happy? or just being lighter?
This was a great podcast though. I may re-listen because I didn't take notes. I don't think they touched on the marketing of happiness, which became a cultural phenomenon... Like that if you're not happy, then you should be chasing it, or that there's something wrong with you if you're not happy (take a med or something).
What if your family hurts you and you’ve tried many times to make it work . But your parents are in the age group of judgement and sometimes coldness . It is a huge loss towards happiness not having family. But you have to leave the situation to stop being set back emotionally.
The other note is .. if you’ve lived in poverty success would give you comfort and calmness . It’s just balance .
When you’ve struggled forever you don’t really need the struggle to keep going ..the fear keeps you going lol
Brilliant. Hands down, this is my favourite podcast of yours todate. Thank you.
I liked the bit about distilling our personal meaning to its purest form- and questioning what is worth dying for? That was quite useful. Arthur does seem to push his beliefs on Chris, particularly with marriage and faith/spirituality. Sure, the research might say some good stuff about it, but its your adherance to the credibily of the research that makes it a self-furfilling prophecy for you. Lets keep it clear here: the value in relationships is connection, and the value of faith/spiritual beliefs is in transcendence. It seems Arthur has found himself in the position of directing people how to improve their lives and this extends to how he directs Chris. He is obviously very self aware-and states and overattachment to his own beliefs. 😊 Some great things to think about from this episode.
Arthur probably believes and has accepted catholism because it’s his wife’s belief and that is Intertwined with family which is a beautiful and feels so good when you know there is always someone there to catch you. That’s what a religious community can give you. Boundaries and love and everyone following the same rules of loving kindness feels so good. So he has accepted those rules and it works for him. His needs are met and he is happy and supported and loved.
Connect to source in the way that feels right for you. Hopefully community and connection if you meet the right partner will come and it could be beautiful too for all.
Like he’s says stop chasing the useless crap that will never fulfill your souls and heart. Love is the answer.
I’m not catholic, I’m just connected to source, my husband is Muslim tough and I see how lovely that community is. But I don’t full believe in all of it so I cannot submit to it. Since lots of religions have a tendency to reject gay people, I don’t like that. Love is love! ❤️
He brought up Nietzsche and said most people follow him. Then he just said don't follow him. He glazed over him.
It's because no one can actually counter Nietzsche without going into extremes to counter the apathy. I think it sucked that he acknowledged Nietzsche ideas as the leading contender in modern life, but like many other people doesn't provide an actual satisfying modern answer to this.
That's because no one really counter it or requires some deep understanding of the modern world right now. Not history. That's my 2 cents.
Anxiety in society is possibly related to the high rate of caffiene use.
Excasberating factor, but not primary cause
"What's your Idol" needs to be a short if it's not already
Incredible talk! Im only half way through & got 4 pages of notes! cholk-full of practical advice. Thank you Chris for inviting Arthur Brooks. Keep doing your great work!
Hmm Thomas Aquinas reference. Chris you can find some commonalities with Bishop Barron on the topic of values. He can also discuss the youth and latin mass culture
I love Arthur Brooks’ work in popularizing the fluid vs. crystal intelligence as it relates to finding purpose later in life. I’m only in my 30s, so it’s a great perspective to explore given that so many of my relatives and mentors are actively figuring out mid-life
ThankQ
Since when do Harvard Professors have two tickets for the gun show?
There are three macro trends that have brought us here.
1. The long march of the 1960s Boomer “counter culture”.
2. Globalization.
3. Tech.
Silicon Valley is the nexus where all three meet.
Anyone who is not actively fighting to roll back the first two and approach the third with the question “what’s best for humans?” is not worth listening to, and is usually obfuscating and gaslighting.
Globalization has been an utter disaster for Western economies, which have been limping on life support since 2008 with low growth due to massive trade deficits and open borders, while the cultural revolution has destroyed the fabric of society that used to provide support in difficult times. Tech is neither good nor bad inherently, but those in positions of responsibility have been flailing to adjust to it, when they’re not trying to harness it for Orwellian oppression.
But no, kids aren’t depressed because of social media. They’re depressed because they have no economic future, and their minds and relationships have been destroyed by cultural insanity.
I have multiple sclerosis
Am fighting for my life
Thank you for your work it’s helping me
My childhood: 'you are more exceptional than your peers, the world is scary so we will do everything for you, when you go against the grain we will plant doubt under the guise of being concerned, we don't talk about emotions'
Thanks for streaming this!
Great episode (as usual). I loved how at 35:20 when Arthur is in the middle of getting really deep a green blob appears!
Please tell me what you're smoking!!!
unintentional facetime reactions✌🎈
I’m sitting here in Sweden. Hot and light summer. There is no darkness at the moment. 😂 Another interesting talk. Thank you both.
39:28 We need a conversation with Gabor Maté on this podcast.
I think locus of control has an impact on happiness as well. Which in a way reenforces his thesis. If an ego can accept being small in big universe, and be comfortable with it, happiness in the moment will follow.
The question "what would you be willing to die for", is a easy question to answer. The answer is "nothing".
I've never been this early! Do I win the terminally online award now?
Nah uh
Helpful sir 😃 thank you
Insightfully Informative !! Good show 👍
Another video to add to my "Crisis of Modernity" playlist
Not sure I agree with the real friend thing (weekly talks). Turning 50 soon and had a best/great friend since age 5 and we talk about once monthly for an hour or so.
"Do something that makes you small and the universe big." Can someone explain this to me a little bit more? Is this referring to finding faith or purpose or your own specific philosophy of life?
For me, which is my subjective truth, it's like this... our consciousness can expand or contract. I can expand my "consciousness" out enough to understand that I am a spec on a blue dot from far enough away or I can contract it down until I am it, completely selfish and self absorbed the only single point of consciousness that I know. It's all my view, but am I part of something bigger? I can expand out to see my work or my city, or the world and choose to be a part of that, connected, or do I contract down and only be out for myself. when he has Hormozi on, he says "if you zoom out far enough, does it matter?" it's like an inner mantra he has to understand if what he's dealing with has meaning in alignment with his most important values. At different times in life it might feel better to be more contracted, or more expanded OR moving in a contracting direction, like this guy was saying with the marble and the sculptor getting down to the real meaning, your real essence, or expanding direction like trying new things, knocking on the doors of life to see what feels right in this season of life.
If we live in a static contraction, then the universe seems small and we are big... whereas with the quote, it's like your sense of wonder is renewed... which is important for things like your capacity to be flexible, to expand, to be curious, to push your edge.... etc. Both are ok and necessary and true and moving.
I hope this help. it's a work.
As the story goes, John Henry was hired as a steel driver for the railroad. Later, the railroad company brought in a steam drill to speed up work on the tunnel. It was said that the steam drill could drill faster than any man. The challenge was on, “man against machine.” John Henry was known as the strongest, the fastest, and the most powerful man working on the railroad. He went up against the steam drill to prove that the black worker could drill a hole through the rock farther and faster than the drill could. Using two 10-pound hammers, one in each hand, he pounded the drill so fast and so hard that he drilled a 14-foot hole into the rock. The legend says that the drill was only able to drill nine feet. John Henry beat the steam drill and later died of exhaustion....
I so strongly resonate with this.
Yes he died. But did so living fully
How many of us are in a state of the opposite. "Living a state of simply existence- just another part in the machine of someone else's means ti "happiness"?
He achieved the result, he beat that machine. His Personal happiness
Opposed to a borrowed achievement....wealth and fame
Happiness is the means by which we travel. Not the achievement (destination/destiny)
well, luckily most of us make a wage and that can be used for some resources for ourselves. it's all connected. if their happiness is the journey to wealth and fame? idk or do they find an empty shell. There's a story in mark manson's "subtle are of not giving a f" that is about the japanese man who served the emperor well into the 1970s on some island keeping the honor of serving, but still pillaging and killing people on the island even though the war was over. The point was, he stuck to his value, but in the end it was a worthless value, or at least a value that could have been served by better action.
John Henry's is similar to maybe the story of marathon.
Living fully is a great question. I question myself right now. am I living fully by writing this comment? probably not... maybe in alignment with a value of mine to dig in to get closer to truth. Maybe living fully isn't so much about the outward but the inward. We will never know if he was living fully or just using all his reserves to beat the machine. The nihilist in me says, yes, he chose his purpose and stood for that. what single thing is more important than the subjective? Although the story has had an inspirational effect on you... so not totally subjective.
Another part thinks there is objective truth and value and human life is precious and of utmost value and so it was a waste to fight the machine... for bigger and faster drills replaced that one... that men also built who had different ideals.
Once again back to living fully and what that actually means?
love this. am authenthic and personal lnvocational response - not about "hit points". But open conversation/ explorative conversation/interaction/ .....connection.
I too, wrestle with the role and vaule of principle within value(s), and its functional place/objective function, and when it crosses the line into blind faith / cult devotional mind set.
How do we distinguish between primal / default instintic/ "instinctual" - and true wisdom ?
Within the torment / pursuit, lies the lessons and wisdom to be discovered, that in times of comfort and abundance. We would never seek.
It is a measure not of absolute, but of greater/deeper understanding (progession) that we know and live and recognize that moment of humility...aka wisdom, that wich we have the eyes to see it for/by.....we do not see the world as it is 99% of the time - we do not believe what we see....But see (interpret) the world by what we believe.
There inlies the challenge/ flaw and....hope/ wiggle room for improvement/ aspiration? (doubt. and its true function in keeping us honest/accounatable)
What are the morriors that serve us?
And what are the mirrors that enslave us to anothers self serving /'selfish" ends....?
Is the reflection a projection of our own wisdom... or playing a bit part in some one elses story/ fantasy.....
Am i, a means to some one esles ends ?
Or do i recognize my own intrinstic value in the game of life we play each day?
@@JSiracusan
If you have a very large extended family that you are very close to can that take the place of friends? I don't seem to have the band with for friends beyond my family.
Is there a new episode of Chris interviewing David Buss yet to release?
For real or deal friends, what if you just make the deal to be REAL friends?
I'd like to know what books Mr. Arthur Brooks has in his background.. 😆
I would love to listen to an episode about finding your passion. I know this is similar but didn’t quite scratch the itch
Happiness is a moment. You get a moment.
14:47 👍
Does comes handy right now thanks for the awesome content Chris
I've always thought of happiness as a state of mind not a goal to be obtained.
Man City with Richards defense
Seems like it took at least half a century for him to understand the things he is preaching now. Anyway, thanks for the interview!
Sun raised 03:40 so I am not gonna raise at 2 am
I think this was my favorite conversation!
Professors are like career military - they go that route so they never have to think or worry about anything. lol
They go from parents - to institutions that are basically their parents, for life.
Take advice from either with a grain of salt.
17:50 wtf you suggested that I should wake up at 4:10??? Dawn is 5:35 here wtf is this 😅
Damn, CZcams is cramming more and more commercials into videos. Making its videos increasingly unwatchable.
two good looking, tall, intelligent men, blessed by genetics, from the top hierarchy talking about the theory of how to stop feeling lost and finding purpose, what an irony
42:35 - This made me think about going to the gym alone, or going on a run alone. Would these be considered enjoyment or pleasure? By the definition above you'd say pleasure (although the gym is healthier than watching porn). Do we accept that going to the gym is a "good" enough behaviour that it's acceptable to do it alone without it seeming sad in the same way we would view someone drinking alone in their house?
Happiness conceived of ethically is constituted by a whole-life lived well.
As fired up as he looks like, I believe that Arthur isn't the type of man that can REALLY inspire people. He talks about HIS preferences and invites us to do the same. Dude, we're all different. Come up with some general guidelines i/o telling us to "seriously study" Sebastian Bach!!!!!
Married people are happier if the marriage goes well, if not is hell. Mr. Brooks, why don't you show us the data that you shout so loud that you have, and expecially, explain to us how they have collected and analyzed. Harvard is bin of garbage, and seeing how you talk, I realized why: you are making ideology not science.
Unfortunately Mr. Brooks hasn't all the answers for all people. What resonates for me might not be for you?
Sometimes, in our own unhappiness, we start placing blame onto others.
I wish someone had all the answers, but in reality, it's never going to work out that way.
I’m curios to hear more of the data around progressive women being the most unhappy. Does anyone know what study or research says this?
I doubt curios have much to do with this conversation.
@@Namelbmert I’m not clear on what you mean.
Just look at them.
wrong: you dont need carbs to survive
Correction on the claim that you'll be happier married. That's only if, as a man, she doesn't destroy you in a divorce, and you aren't in the majority of marriages that are sexless and running on fumes. So the survivors are happer but everyone else is miserable to the point of skyrocketing suicide rates... Go marriage!
of my 2 close guys friends that are married, the one with kids get happy ending massages and pays for "services" by the half-hour, the one without kids seems to just go alone with the wife's life but seems content the little time I see him anymore these days he had also quite drinking and nicotine and is at the gym 2-3 hours a day.
looking at both... I think I'm ok just chillin alone.
I don't really see why marriage would be a source of happiness.
A good partnership with someone you love/trust, THAT could be a useful source of happiness. No marriage required. Kids? Try babysitting the kids of your siblings/cousins/friends. You can get great enjoyment out of that, with 1% of the worry/hassle/cost. And if you do that, and find yourself not really interested, then that's a good indicator that maybe kids are not for you.
Sorry it didn't work for these guys. But 33 years later it's doing okay by me. My parents have been married for 64 years and still seem to be enjoying other. Very grateful for my wife and children. I never doubt that my life has meaning and purpose.
@@federoffm for every one of us there are two more drinking their sorrows. Exactly my point.
Arthur needs new metaphors - same ole stuff
JBP content with fewer biblical references
always great guests but i dont like how you dont have intros on your videos Chris.
Ohh nooo, didn't realize Chris isn't married with kids in like late 30's, pick one of your 12 supermodel hookups and make it happen bruh, time's up.
Quid Est Veritas?
I would need to keep meaning, pleasure, and honor. Power and money could leave. Hopefully though I’ll make enough money not to be in poverty, that is the assumption.
This guy looks like older Sean Connery
San Francisco Offices Are EMPTY As Companies Leave
Market Gains
He is being haunted by a ghost
Happiness will be being able to eventually afford to buy a house. Everything else has to wait until after that.
It’s not I promise.