If Team Fortress 2 Was Updated by a Bot

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  • čas přidán 18. 12. 2021
  • Heavy is entrusted with creating the latest TF2 update, but in his keyboard-slamming haste, copies the patch notes into a Markov Text Generator and submits the results. What could go wrong?
    The patch notes in this video were generated using a Markov Chain Text Generator, which you can use here: projects.haykranen.nl/markov/...
    Patch notes taken from these posts (and also a few I generated on my own):
    / the_latest_update_if_i...
    / i_asked_a_markov_chain...
    / the_totally_not_real_u...
    Narration and voice acting (excluding the TF2 classes) done by me. Special thanks to The Conceptionist for helping put together the ending shot. The "New Weapons Soldier" in the intro originally created by Genowhirl70.
    GMod Addons used that I forgot to put in the credits:
    Stop Motion Helper: steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Advanced Camera: steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Team Fortress 2 Bots: steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Team Fortress Pill Pack (for playing as TF2 classes): steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Advanced Particle Controller (for explosions and stuff): steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Ragdoll Mover: steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Easy Animation Tool (for putting game animations on ragdolls): steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Animated Prop Tool (same as above): steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Sleep'n'Wake Tool: steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Turret Tool: steamcommunity.com/sharedfile...
    Source audio for the Soldier screaming in Polish: • Crazy Russian Gamer lo...
  • Komedie

Komentáře • 5K

  • @aceskeletonne7446
    @aceskeletonne7446 Před 2 lety +9588

    "Rumor has it Florida exists" actually seems like something valve would put in their patch notes in 2011-2015 era tf2

  • @mat8ty532
    @mat8ty532 Před 2 lety +2326

    7:18 I love how it says “fixed” like scouts entire existence was a mistake they made and never bothered to fix for the 14 years tf2 has existed until now

    • @notatimetraveler6444
      @notatimetraveler6444 Před 2 lety +199

      It's pretty funny, considering lore wise Scout is quite literally god's gift to -man- Women.

    • @thebishopoldchannel76
      @thebishopoldchannel76 Před 2 lety +54

      isn't the definition of fixed also set in place as if a sentry
      if so this update would turn 1/4 the classes into sentry guns

    • @kappnk9821
      @kappnk9821 Před 2 lety +14

      @@notatimetraveler6444 god's gift to women*

    • @notatimetraveler6444
      @notatimetraveler6444 Před 2 lety +5

      @@kappnk9821 You right!

    • @robonator2945
      @robonator2945 Před 2 lety +27

      yeah for some reason no-one seems to have noticed it but the scout was actually a bug, not a feature.

  • @BatinWithThemCheese
    @BatinWithThemCheese Před 4 měsíci +222

    “Fixed a bug where players.”
    Thank you.

    • @lolliii5477
      @lolliii5477 Před měsícem +1

      is it fixing the bug where player spin?

    • @TakoTrucker
      @TakoTrucker Před 27 dny

      @@lolliii5477it erased players

    • @Comrade_Alex_228
      @Comrade_Alex_228 Před 6 dny

      @@lolliii5477 Y E S (actually no, now bots are spinning)

  • @Cotton_Mouth
    @Cotton_Mouth Před rokem +1535

    5:20 I unironicly love the idea of a taunt that has a ¼ chance of blowing you up. 😂

    • @smug2525
      @smug2525 Před 10 měsíci +176

      A more Russian-Roulette style kamikaze.

    • @mad_goddess2830
      @mad_goddess2830 Před 9 měsíci +67

      Well do I have something to say about the equaliser (or if you want it to be luck based rock paper scissors does if you do the kill bind when you lose)

    • @funni_moksi69
      @funni_moksi69 Před 7 měsíci +19

      @@smug2525 I think its just Russian roulette

    • @AverageCatz
      @AverageCatz Před 7 měsíci +26

      @@funni_moksi69 Holy shit they should add Russian Roulette taunt to TF2

    • @funni_moksi69
      @funni_moksi69 Před 6 měsíci +1

      @@AverageCatz YEEEAH

  • @Garbo_trashcan
    @Garbo_trashcan Před 2 lety +4054

    "fixed an issue where scout could run"
    finally, a good update

    • @Meh-fo7sp
      @Meh-fo7sp Před 2 lety +162

      Tomislav crits scout is by far the best one

    • @jtohgaming
      @jtohgaming Před 2 lety +41

      *finally an update

    • @chesed_yt1
      @chesed_yt1 Před 2 lety +54

      Finaly no more speedrunning intel capture as scout

    • @Nittin.
      @Nittin. Před 2 lety +56

      " Fixed a bug where ammo."

    • @Nittin.
      @Nittin. Před 2 lety +34

      "as for the crit a cola, we have added teleportals"

  • @madmimika1973
    @madmimika1973 Před 2 lety +4555

    Scout getting progressively nerfed into the ground, from "fixed scout being able to run", to "tomislav now crits scout", Then SCOUT EVICTION IN 7 SECONDS, and finally just fixing being able to play scout is really funny to me.

  • @Silliestgooberz
    @Silliestgooberz Před 10 měsíci +1206

    3:46
    I love soldiers face here. He’s not even mad or upset. He’s just confused by this utter nonsense.

    • @Vivzedar
      @Vivzedar Před 8 měsíci +89

      i would be too if all of a sudden my computer just vanished along with tf2

    • @JetFalcon710
      @JetFalcon710 Před 8 měsíci +36

      @@Vivzedar Especially if I was just watching a Scout ragdoll spazzing out

    • @APLE_LEADER
      @APLE_LEADER Před 7 měsíci +20

      Hes like "Wtf just happened"

    • @nameless......................
      @nameless...................... Před 5 měsíci +6

      ammo (this is a message split through multiple replies to different comments)

    • @cevatkokbudak6414
      @cevatkokbudak6414 Před 2 měsíci

      ​@@nameless......................what

  • @a_nice_hat6850
    @a_nice_hat6850 Před 10 měsíci +382

    5:20 would actually be a pretty cool easter egg to the kritzkrieg, overdosing after taunting too much

  • @Earthyburt
    @Earthyburt Před 2 lety +6194

    "Scout Eviction in 7 seconds" was so ominous and terrifying

  • @savvythedivineyethuggable7493
    @savvythedivineyethuggable7493 Před 2 lety +2249

    3:51 "Updated someone."
    Spy: "He could be any one of us! He could be you! He could be me!"

    • @whatisinspectelement
      @whatisinspectelement Před 2 lety +180

      "He could even be-"

    • @DrLiam-fg6wd
      @DrLiam-fg6wd Před 2 lety

      @@whatisinspectelement *shotgun blast*

    • @IAMHIMJOYBOY
      @IAMHIMJOYBOY Před 2 lety +205

      “What? It was obvious he’s the one the got updated.”

    • @DrLiam-fg6wd
      @DrLiam-fg6wd Před 2 lety +178

      @@IAMHIMJOYBOY see. the patch notes will list it any second now

    • @andredominguez3199
      @andredominguez3199 Před 2 lety +173

      ...Aaaaaany second now.
      See? Patch notes! Wait... That's Scout.

  • @PeytonianYT
    @PeytonianYT Před rokem +173

    The fact that the "adding pyros head" could be interpreted as a fix to the spy bug where disguised as pyro his head is missing is pretty cool.

    • @nameless......................
      @nameless...................... Před 2 měsíci +8

      on the topic of spy,
      imma translate "spy no long uber build slightly"
      "when healing spies, your uber takes a slightly shorter amount of time to build"

    • @renthewerecat
      @renthewerecat Před měsícem +3

      if they ever fix that bug that HAS to be what the patch notes say

  • @Soldier_Sprout
    @Soldier_Sprout Před rokem +215

    Imagine seeing the entire team being snipers, taunting while cosmetics fall from the sky and crashing your game

    • @saber2802
      @saber2802 Před 4 měsíci +15

      I would laugh so hard as TF2's economy crashes and all lobbies turn into friendlies

  • @stuffiemario132
    @stuffiemario132 Před rokem +2896

    I like the idea that the Heavy Update is not "Heavy focused" but "Made by Heavy"

    • @zumbie8049
      @zumbie8049 Před 10 měsíci +124

      Heavy care about his teammates

    • @5d4a5
      @5d4a5 Před 10 měsíci +18

      @@zumbie8049 yep

    • @Aaa-vp6ug
      @Aaa-vp6ug Před 10 měsíci

      @@zumbie8049except scout

    • @drakesword5214
      @drakesword5214 Před 9 měsíci +68

      @@zumbie8049 Except scout, apparently.

    • @JackNick2000
      @JackNick2000 Před 9 měsíci +61

      @@drakesword5214he stole his Sandvich once. A Heavy never forgets

  • @chexmax2848
    @chexmax2848 Před 2 lety +6827

    “aiming players will no longer output damage” holy shit the bot fixed the bot crisis

  • @thechaosreaper
    @thechaosreaper Před rokem +122

    3:50 It's the Heavy Update, I think it's pretty clear who got updated

  • @Nod_Lucario
    @Nod_Lucario Před rokem +158

    5:03 New Weapon: The Kurwacka
    Headshots cause enemies to speak Polish
    + 80% Damage increase to non-Polish Speakers
    + Instantly Jarates on body-shot
    - 25% Damage decrease to Polish Speakers
    - No Random Crits

    • @iamwoke322
      @iamwoke322 Před 8 měsíci +11

      Welshwacka
      Upon headshotting someone, they are forced to speak Welsh until respawn
      +25% damage to non-Welsh speakers
      +60% localization speed
      -25% damage to Welsh speakers
      -Byth yn mynd i roi'r gorau iddi

    • @AncientFire
      @AncientFire Před 2 měsíci +2

      Let's goo I only take 75 percent of damage with the kurwacka!!!! This is an achievement.

    • @eliseymullov667
      @eliseymullov667 Před 27 dny

      sukabladwaka
      Upon headshotting someone, they are forced to speak Russian until chernobyl didnt detonate.
      +25% damage to peoples from another area of city
      +60% localization speed
      -25% damage to english speakers
      -КУБА(Комунизм
      У
      Берегов
      Америки)

  • @hamburg4034
    @hamburg4034 Před 2 lety +3113

    Valve: "Alright guys, we've fixed the aimbot problem!"
    3:09

    • @weegee42069
      @weegee42069 Před 2 lety +112

      Awesome

    • @spacular7675
      @spacular7675 Před 2 lety +146

      Awesome update, Valve!

    • @jihrexz666
      @jihrexz666 Před 2 lety +66

      Awesome update, Valve! Just awesome

    • @nullpug5445
      @nullpug5445 Před 2 lety +51

      Awesome update, Valve! just awesome, Superb

    • @O.Kproductions
      @O.Kproductions Před 2 lety +34

      Awesome update, valve! Just awesome, superb, seriously amazing!

  • @misscookiesncrime
    @misscookiesncrime Před 2 lety +2643

    This gives me heavy vibes of the “Multiply a Weapon’s Stats by 10” animation from 10 years ago, but modern.

    • @DrOcsid
      @DrOcsid  Před 2 lety +293

      I did always love that animation, it's a very good one.

    • @grebgrimpkit
      @grebgrimpkit Před 2 lety +12

      @@DrOcsid hey could you do a part 2

    • @Dkrule1
      @Dkrule1 Před 2 lety +6

      @@DrOcsid hay mate, I would pay you right now to get working on another,,,I needed this

    • @pearljaime2
      @pearljaime2 Před 2 lety +5

      10 years already? Damn...

    • @KL53986
      @KL53986 Před 2 lety +3

      You mean the animation where Razorback is actually good but once again who cares, you get shot by revolver, or get Ambassador headshot even it deals like 102 damage at max, which is not instadeath but it brings you to critical health anyway.

  • @adriansgaminguniverse4951
    @adriansgaminguniverse4951 Před rokem +256

    0:37 literally the most accurate representation of valve I’ve ever seen

  • @thestickopia4619
    @thestickopia4619 Před rokem +186

    7:09
    As if scout didn’t already struggle against heavy

    • @BM_Pink
      @BM_Pink Před 4 měsíci

      Stand your ground
      Fight like a man

    • @mysterymastermind175
      @mysterymastermind175 Před 2 měsíci +2

      Whatcha talking about? A good scout just dances on Heavy's head while 3 shotting him with the scattergun

    • @ChaseMC215
      @ChaseMC215 Před měsícem +1

      ​@@mysterymastermind175
      Not when you see Heavy attack Scout with his sandvich.

    • @The_whales
      @The_whales Před 18 dny

      @@mysterymastermind175or when you realize he can’t run

    • @jblazerndrowzy
      @jblazerndrowzy Před 6 dny

      @@mysterymastermind175Natascha:

  • @Majima_Nowhere
    @Majima_Nowhere Před 2 lety +2726

    A line of snipers dancing while hats rain from the sky is quite possibly the most TF2 thing I've ever seen.

  • @BakuraEX
    @BakuraEX Před 2 lety +370

    So, among other things:
    -There will be tons more Spies, but that's okay because they suck now.
    -We hate Scout.

    • @TheDuckyDino
      @TheDuckyDino Před 2 lety +43

      Scout? You mean that one glitched character valve accidentally left in?

    • @somehowimstillhere
      @somehowimstillhere Před 2 lety

      @@TheDuckyDino shut up go back to dreamland-

    • @MrDawid06
      @MrDawid06 Před 2 lety +12

      And now demoknight is way better than anything +Smissmas

    • @zizo5349
      @zizo5349 Před 2 lety +6

      @@MrDawid06 also he explodes

    • @IdiotamSpielen
      @IdiotamSpielen Před 2 lety +12

      And there will be no players.

  • @FistNoob
    @FistNoob Před rokem +127

    7:50 ah yes a normal day in Australia

  • @Treebox_
    @Treebox_ Před 9 měsíci +49

    1:53 The way scout says RAGEQUIT just killed me

  • @mrsquid_
    @mrsquid_ Před 2 lety +1199

    3:48 i love how heavy is just yelling PYRO YOU BITCH after commiting arson to 2fort

  • @williambutcher7429
    @williambutcher7429 Před rokem +501

    “Tomislav now crits scout”
    This truly is heavy update. 200% better

  • @BrimBlam
    @BrimBlam Před rokem +77

    The demo minicrit and explosion to Smissmas 2015 had me genuinely laughing. Holy shit that bit got me.

  • @commanderdemonno9819
    @commanderdemonno9819 Před 10 měsíci +27

    i love how some of the changes bleed over into future scenes
    like for instance, the spy doesn't backstab the engineer with the 90 second afterburn penalty because he runs purely with a revolver now
    very smart, i like

  • @winterwolf7812
    @winterwolf7812 Před rokem +1883

    There will never be a patch note more ominous then "The Damage"

    • @iamwoke322
      @iamwoke322 Před 11 měsíci +142

      “Abandoning a match will now result in Halloween.”
      oh fr?
      >woke guy has left the game

    • @dumpanimator
      @dumpanimator Před 10 měsíci +35

      ​@@iamwoke322at least we get a spell lol that not that bad unleash solar light was in enemy team

    • @fadingdreamx
      @fadingdreamx Před 9 měsíci +50

      Don't forget "added the pyro's head."

    • @thefunniman3285
      @thefunniman3285 Před 9 měsíci +35

      Don't forget "SCOUT EVICTION IN 7 SECONDS"

    • @cojocariutudor586
      @cojocariutudor586 Před 8 měsíci

      What about S P Y I S B U R N E D W H I L E U N I S G U I S E T O H E L L

  • @carolinewald3109
    @carolinewald3109 Před 2 lety +3991

    “Updated someone”
    “Added 32 new characters”
    These work together surprisingly well

    • @codenatex2690
      @codenatex2690 Před rokem +245

      Have fun guessing if it's Spy, Scout, South, West, East, Heavy, Urmomm-

    • @heymedic6398
      @heymedic6398 Před rokem +114

      INCLUDING THE BRAND NEW GESTAPO UNIT

    • @oliverharston815
      @oliverharston815 Před rokem +56

      @@armyofbamburais3788 Any one of the new spys

    • @mugiwaradarwin4504
      @mugiwaradarwin4504 Před rokem +39

      - Guest starring....The "SKULLS" Parasite Unit.

    • @mugiwaradarwin4504
      @mugiwaradarwin4504 Před rokem +30

      - Featuring Dante from the Devil May Cry series!

  • @lavie_tea654
    @lavie_tea654 Před rokem +56

    3:36 I could totally believe that being a real bug in TF2

  • @wander7812
    @wander7812 Před 8 měsíci +154

    I asked an actual bot (ChatGPT AI actually) to give me Patchnotes like that and it gave me this:
    - Adjusted gravity "banana"
    - Removed gravity
    - Updated the Engineer's wrench with more wrenchiness
    - Fixed the players again
    - Randomized Pyro's flamethrower particles into confetti
    - Scout now moves at the speed of smell
    - Removed all unlockable hats and replaced them with fish
    - Slightly increased the Pyro's ability to set things on fire by 3000%
    - Added 37 new invisible hats
    - Heavy now only communicates through interpretive dance
    - Fixed Spy disguising as existential dread
    - Reverted everything to a previous version that doesn't exist
    - Added "invisible sandwich" as a consumable for the Heavy
    - Demoman's sticky bombs now apologize for any inconvenience.
    - Medics can now heal their own boredom
    EDIT: I'm on reddit. Pretty cool.
    But for people wondering yeah this WAS made by ChatGPT. I simply asked it to create bad updates, instead of normal updates.
    As I stated, "I asked gpt to create updates like these (in the video)"

  • @vasilybullock7967
    @vasilybullock7967 Před 2 lety +699

    The bit where snipers spawns unlimited hats and crashed the economy was probably the best

  • @kokorikopi
    @kokorikopi Před 2 lety +647

    "Fixed the Spy" is a more intriguing update than anything valve has put out in four years.

    • @linusdickens4767
      @linusdickens4767 Před 2 lety

      Troo

    • @valeriopampanoni3573
      @valeriopampanoni3573 Před 2 lety +6

      @@linusdickens4767 They just removed the Dead Ringer

    • @averagephlogfan6475
      @averagephlogfan6475 Před 2 lety +1

      They just castrate him

    • @pqbdwmnu
      @pqbdwmnu Před 2 lety +8

      The spy class was originally based off a glitch where a character would appear to be on the opposite team.
      Fixing him just removes his disguise, making him a really balanced class

    • @linusdickens4767
      @linusdickens4767 Před 2 lety +1

      No shit sherlock

  • @Ningumkkk
    @Ningumkkk Před 5 měsíci +17

    6:03 unhelpful engineer moment

  • @JenovaDreamweaver
    @JenovaDreamweaver Před rokem +67

    4:13 I love how demo just FACEPLANTS LOL

  • @MelonTF2
    @MelonTF2 Před 2 lety +4194

    Man, this video is so underrated, I laughed the whole time

    • @jihrexz666
      @jihrexz666 Před 2 lety +15

      SAME XDDD

    • @MelonTF2
      @MelonTF2 Před 2 lety +28

      @@kazama5555 everywhere

    • @catmanconant9798
      @catmanconant9798 Před 2 lety +8

      i see a youtuber comment on another youtubers video, its like a fucking crossover episode

    • @MelonTF2
      @MelonTF2 Před 2 lety +10

      @@AKDProducts45 Until it hits at least 1M views, it's underrated in my eyes

    • @Pllid
      @Pllid Před 2 lety +3

      Same

  • @domeen0gt895
    @domeen0gt895 Před 2 lety +584

    I'm suprised there weren't more new weapons like the construction notice.

    • @DrOcsid
      @DrOcsid  Před 2 lety +179

      good point, if i do a sequel i will make sure to try and get it to generate some more weapons

    • @theovermind6041
      @theovermind6041 Před 2 lety +30

      @@DrOcsid Please make a sequel.

    • @not_quiteknown
      @not_quiteknown Před 2 lety +10

      @@DrOcsid feed us father

    • @jojogacha974
      @jojogacha974 Před 2 lety +2

      @@DrOcsid pls this one was so funny pls add more fix’s

    • @Destoroyahpng
      @Destoroyahpng Před 2 lety +1

      @@DrOcsid definitely do a sequel this was hilarious

  • @chaotic_llama6989
    @chaotic_llama6989 Před 11 měsíci +16

    7:40 I thought the punchline was going to be that, once the second sniper got a red dot on his gun, he would taunt, but the dot was just the opposing sniper’s laser, and he would get shot. Then the opposing sniper would taunt and get the cosmetics

  • @MajinTails
    @MajinTails Před rokem +52

    4:50 So...does this imply that the narrator was "removed from liberty" as well?

  • @chaoscontroller316
    @chaoscontroller316 Před 2 lety +765

    Flammable maps actually sounds like a good gimmick idea, I wanna see it.

  • @manncheez707
    @manncheez707 Před 2 lety +198

    7:14 deleted scene of “Meet the Scout”

    • @cruisader9680
      @cruisader9680 Před 9 měsíci +9

      The outtake he didn’t want you seeing

    • @malthe236
      @malthe236 Před 8 měsíci

      Realistic outghahvjauvgiviwguibhuwiyfc

  • @jsbrickstation
    @jsbrickstation Před rokem +6

    0:45 pov:you a heavy main and the enemy's team is just scouts

  • @Scp_enjoyer173
    @Scp_enjoyer173 Před rokem +23

    John: *hits chair*
    His entire nervous and body systems: " Guess I'll die."
    also the sniper cosmetic thing htat was wholesome as hell i loved it

  • @TheRockruffWhoCries
    @TheRockruffWhoCries Před rokem +1514

    6:40 I love how innocent the Engineer's smile is

  • @thediam0nddrag0n78
    @thediam0nddrag0n78 Před 2 lety +440

    "Tomslav now crits Scout"
    I need this

    • @weebcraft6829
      @weebcraft6829 Před 2 lety +40

      If only the Natasha did its goddamn job

    • @tommarch.4493
      @tommarch.4493 Před 2 lety +32

      but there's no more scouts

    • @sollew7434
      @sollew7434 Před 2 lety +1

      kinda useless though cuz scout only has 125 hp

    • @jacksonlideen891
      @jacksonlideen891 Před 2 lety +11

      @@sollew7434 yes, but now it crits SPECIFICALLY scout

    • @sollew7434
      @sollew7434 Před 2 lety

      @@jacksonlideen891 e🅱️ic

  • @atomicscout2013
    @atomicscout2013 Před 8 měsíci +7

    Ever since scout caused halloween the game started hunting him, starting this update

  • @itzskyeplayz1626
    @itzskyeplayz1626 Před 10 měsíci +10

    3:48 “Pyro you b*tch!” 😆

  • @lemone630
    @lemone630 Před 2 lety +251

    "Added The Damage"
    God I love how vaguely threatening that feels

    • @justforapps1670
      @justforapps1670 Před rokem +23

      When you peak a snipers sightline

    • @cheetahstar6790
      @cheetahstar6790 Před rokem +9

      @@justforapps1670 suddenly the damage

    • @nameless......................
      @nameless...................... Před 9 měsíci +1

      Ununoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)
      :30:30:30:30:30:30:30:30:30:30industrial moist spaghetti on pizzawurtzite boron nitrideRIGGYRAISE WE BRINGIN BEACON BONNIE OUTTA OBSCURITY WITH THIS ONE95U4EX7YY2E4Na wiresUnunoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)
      Ununoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)
      Ununoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)
      Ununoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)
      Ununoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)
      Ununoctium
      (118, Uuo)
      Radon
      (86, Rn)
      Oxygen
      (8, O)
      Copper
      (29, Cu)
      Selenium
      (34, Se)
      Platinum
      (78, Pt)
      Tungsten
      (74, W)
      Gold
      (79, Au)
      Xenon
      (54, Xe)
      Magnesium
      (12, Mg)
      Ununquadium
      (114, Uuq)

    • @nameless......................
      @nameless...................... Před 9 měsíci +1

      Spy no long uber build sightly

    • @nameless......................
      @nameless...................... Před 9 měsíci +1

      Spy no long uber build slightly better to do this with a lot more people in a car and then the right person to be a new car driver for a long period and a few years back to do the job of the same car driver in a few months or months and you can see that the right way is to be able and then to do the right things and then get the best fuel for a good price for the same reason you have to pay the same amount as the right time and the same as you can see on this site in a year and you are going through the right way to do the right way

  • @mattheworozco5929
    @mattheworozco5929 Před rokem +1468

    “Pyro head added”
    Scout wasn’t afraid of a decapitated pyro head. He was afraid of an empty gas mask. They added an actual head for pyro. This means pyro is out there showing the world their new face, and none of the mercenaries are ready to open that can of worms.

    • @elfascisto6549
      @elfascisto6549 Před rokem +48

      Just search for "pyro but you can understand him" and you'll see his face

    • @afunkingamer2415
      @afunkingamer2415 Před 11 měsíci +16

      *what have they done...*

    • @dumpanimator
      @dumpanimator Před 11 měsíci +18

      Pyro is bald and always being bald in concept art

    • @RedLaundryBasket
      @RedLaundryBasket Před 7 měsíci +25

      @@dumpanimatordemo man was also white before, we probably shouldn’t trust the old designs.

    • @duck-Sticknodes
      @duck-Sticknodes Před 6 měsíci +10

      ​@@RedLaundryBasketwasnt he also ginger?

  • @archbishopTL1
    @archbishopTL1 Před 11 měsíci +10

    the fact that the scout eviction actually took 7 seconds is amazing

  • @O5_CounciI
    @O5_CounciI Před rokem +14

    It would be so funny to be playing a regular match and just start seeing hats fall from the sky.

  • @X-SPONGED
    @X-SPONGED Před 2 lety +2210

    2:07
    Bot Dev: "Casual - Matches can now start"
    "Matches will add additional spies"
    *_"A small price to pay for salvation..."_*

  • @malcolmlloydandrileyproduc6451

    Construction notice
    ✔hitting buildings fixes and upgrades them
    ✔30% more firing speed
    ✔25%less melee damage taken on wearer
    ❌15%slower movement on deploy
    ❌25% less damage
    When worn allows you to do the "pootis spencer" leaving behind a calling card

  • @mr.derpyface558
    @mr.derpyface558 Před 9 měsíci +5

    2:30 We making it out the PS2 with this one 🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥

  • @chishnfips877
    @chishnfips877 Před 4 měsíci +8

    7:30 Sniper crashes the TF2 economy

  • @g.r.senterprisevenatorclas7314

    3:31 They forgot to mention the Blue Engineer now builds Red Buildings.

  • @Fergusand
    @Fergusand Před 2 lety +3812

    This isn’t the heavy update, this is the anti-scout update.

    • @twin_towers_destroyer
      @twin_towers_destroyer Před 2 lety +380

      A heavy update would still be the fuck you scout update because heavy destroys scouts most of the time, like how jungle inferno was the “fuck you spy” because everyone was pyro

    • @crockowithglocko576
      @crockowithglocko576 Před 2 lety +27

      Basicly

    • @Oxygen1004
      @Oxygen1004 Před 2 lety +52

      So, the Heavy update?

    • @TinyDeskEngineer
      @TinyDeskEngineer Před 2 lety +22

      What's the difference?

    • @FNicky91
      @FNicky91 Před 2 lety

      ​@@twin_towers_destroyer really?
      i've killed plenty of heavies. the large fatty fats.. fat, fats
      like you- ow. no offense..

  • @terg7822
    @terg7822 Před 8 měsíci +2

    6:38 I can't believe the greatest detective, jakkid166, plays TF2.

  • @xc_game2707
    @xc_game2707 Před 9 měsíci +15

    I took the summer update and ran it through the Markov, here you go:
    hort performance
    Improved optimisation volume of small visuals
    Fixed Engineer not being able to move/shoot while it’s deployed
    Fixed pl_enclosing able to C to improved player clipping
    Updated cp_steel
    Prop collision cleanup and stability issue with the Strange Count Transfer Tool not being able to move for the Mann vs. Machine upgrade panel closions
    Added occluders to trange Count Translator
    Fix rare double death bug when falling ceiling stuck in spawn locations on pl_cashworks
    Fixed missmas 2021/2022 Cosmetic Case not being shown in the Mann vs. Machine upgrade panel closing after 2019 War Paint Case models
    Fixed some tournament medals
    Updated cp_steel
    Prop collision issues, with the Taunt: Teufort Tango
    Large Summer 2023 patch:
    14 new community maps: Sharkbay, Rotunda, Phoenix, Cashworks
    Fix room on pl_enclosure_final point is more accurate to the ConTracker and stuck spots and stuck spots including explosion on rock near final to fix localization where a tele spawn locations
    Added some tournament crash related to the map
    Spawn on A
    Fixed some tournament medals
    Fixed an exploits
    Improve performance
    Improved optimisations and their exits
    Fixed numerous perch points
    Fixed some tournament medals
    Updated players being able to enter teleporter could be build out of the Mann Co. Store
    Updated to the visuals
    Updated/Added occluders being able to transfer stats for a short perch point so it is more a teleporter the Universal Translator
    Fixed a transparency issues, with sticky and rocket jumping
    Fix rare double death bugs
    Fixed missing after doing The High Five taunt
    Fix rare double death bug when falling clipping
    Updated clipping able to A
    Updated/Added occluders to C to improved optimisation issues (collisions on stairs, props, etc.)
    Fixing able to trange Count Transfer stats for vsh_distillery
    Fixed missing No Headphones style for a short period of small visuals
    Fix Pixel walk collision cleanup and improved optimisation issues (collision issues
    Fixing contributor for vsh_distillery, VSH Skirmish, and improved clipping, etc.)
    Fix Pyro door exploit on rock near final to fix localization issues
    Fixing ceiling contributor for vsh_distillery
    Fixed the Smissmas 2021/2022 Cosmetic Case models
    Fixed spelling for Sandvich items
    Fixed spelling exploit related cp_steel
    Prop collision, props, etc.)
    Fix Pixel walk collision on pl_cashworks, Venice, Reckoner, Sulfur, Hard Carry Unusual effect
    Fixed a teleporter could be build
    rate to the visuals
    Fixed lots of small visual bugs
    Fixed some small exploits
    Clean up geometry in spawns, the spawn location where a teleporter audio that was referencing the dispenser by mistake in Spanish
    Fixed incorrect alpha channels for the Smissmas 2021/2022 Cosmetic Case models
    Fixed lots of small visual bugs
    Fixed some small exploits
    Improved clipping
    Updated cp_steel
    Prop collision cleanup and improved player clipping and stuck spots including exploits
    Clean up geometry in spawns, the spawn locations and their exits
    Fix roof readability issues, with sticky and rocket jumping
    Fix rare double death bug when falling into pit
    Fix Cliff stuck spots including exploits
    Clean up geometry in spawn door to A
    Updated cp_steel
    Prop collision cleanup and improved player clipping
    Explosive splash bug collision cleanup and improved clipping
    Updated cp_mossrock
    Fixed numerous perch points
    Fixed the Mann vs. Machine upgrade panel closing after receiving a matchmaking party invite
    Fixed a locations and their exits
    Fix roof readability issues, with sticky and rocket jumping
    Fix rare overtime cap bug
    Fix Red team getting stuck in spawn door to A
    Updated cp_mossrock
    Fixed numerous perch points
    Fixed the Mann vs. Machine upgrade panel closing after receiving a matchmaking party invite
    Fixed lots of small visual bugs
    Fixed lots of small visual bugs
    Fixed some small exploits
    Improved clipping
    Updated cp_gravelpit_snowy
    Boosted volume of snowman explosions
    Added occluders to C to improve performance
    Improved clipping
    Updated cp_steel
    Prop collision cleanup and improvements
    Fixed the Strange Count Transfer stats for Sandvich items
    Fixed an explosions
    Added occluders to C to improve performance
    Improved clipping
    Updated cp_gravelpit_snowy
    Boosted volume of snowman explosions
    Added occluders to C to improvements
    Fixed the Engineer teleporter audio that was referencing the dispenser by mistake in Spanish
    Fixed incorrect alpha channels for the Smissmas 2021/2022 Cosmetic Case models
    Fixed the Winter 2019 War Paint Case not being shown in the Mann Co. Store
    Updated cp_gravelpit_snowy
    Boosted volume of snowman explosions
    Added occluders to C to improve performance
    Improved optimisationrop collision cleanup and improved player clipping
    Explosive splash bug collision on rock near final point so it is more accurate to the visuals
    Fixed players being able to transfer Tool not being able to move for a short period of time after doi

  • @NobodyEvenReadsNames
    @NobodyEvenReadsNames Před 2 lety +398

    7:08 killed me, it's just crapping on the Scout back to back to back for no reason

  • @HoovyTube
    @HoovyTube Před 2 lety +3264

    This is really hilarious. Fantastic animation style too, fits perfectly with the premise of the video.

  • @dylanmeister335
    @dylanmeister335 Před rokem +16

    We need a part 2 to this masterpiece

  • @theentertainer6198
    @theentertainer6198 Před 10 měsíci +5

    In a way this is the heavy update, indirectly. It absolutely slaughters scout (which can be harder to hit), it massively nerfs Spy by only letting him use the revolver (no more backstabs) and now aiming players no longer output damage, removing Sniper’s headshots. And now Tomislav cries Scouts (which no longer exist) and lunchbox items now have 10% attack (???)

  • @MRDarkman
    @MRDarkman Před 2 lety +1181

    I couldn't stop LAUGHING!!!!
    This NEEDS a part 2!

  • @derpysponge43
    @derpysponge43 Před 2 lety +286

    The part with “use the air” actually worked on me due to laughing.

  • @TheManOfMyriad
    @TheManOfMyriad Před rokem +86

    I wonder if we can get a sequel to this with how much AI Generated text as improved... Could be even crazier!

  • @jennymolina3885
    @jennymolina3885 Před rokem +56

    2:15 make me laugh out loud

  • @scottsalinas7019
    @scottsalinas7019 Před 2 lety +958

    7:14 this kinda reminds me of the "meet the scout" where scout is messing with heavy by interrupting his sandvich meal, now it's heavy punching scout with his sandvich meal.

  • @ChrisNinjaEagle
    @ChrisNinjaEagle Před 2 lety +986

    4:45 "removed the spy from liberty" 😂 the way it's delivered, the way the spy reacts, and the way the bars and jail cell just come form no where is absolutely hilarious. Top shelf!

    • @Iron8127
      @Iron8127 Před rokem +1

      Jail in hell wow

    • @HaydounDO
      @HaydounDO Před rokem +35

      2:47 is good too

    • @chuck5746
      @chuck5746 Před rokem +14

      kind of ironic too

    • @guylikei6357
      @guylikei6357 Před rokem +9

      He’s angrier having his F R E E D O M removed than being in literal hell

  • @spamton_g_spamtom474
    @spamton_g_spamtom474 Před 6 měsíci +3

    4:19 this aged like the finest wine on the market 🍷

  • @blacksfrommoon
    @blacksfrommoon Před rokem +8

    Im so proud how fast your channel is growing and how so many people relate to you. Sending love!

  • @danielsinclair6586
    @danielsinclair6586 Před rokem +300

    I have no idea how casual players like me were ever able to enjoy Team Fortress 2 before the Heavy Update. Matches being allowed to start has completely transformed the entire experience for me, and I can't quite put my feelings into words.

    • @claudiogivone4435
      @claudiogivone4435 Před 11 měsíci +27

      Yeah unfortunately is a little hard to see since they have fixed getting a screen

    • @thatsguy1111
      @thatsguy1111 Před 11 měsíci +28

      @@claudiogivone4435
      It confuses me how some people forget that they can use visual telepathy

    • @appelofdoom8211
      @appelofdoom8211 Před 11 měsíci +12

      The additional spies are kinda annoying though

    • @Otherface
      @Otherface Před 10 měsíci +16

      I know right. My favorite part is that they fixed an issue where players

    • @Schnort
      @Schnort Před 10 měsíci +2

      ​@@thatsguy1111please don't make fun of disabled people, that's ableism

  • @MKTB22
    @MKTB22 Před rokem +1115

    6:40 “However, to offset this, there is a 90 second afterburn penalty on engineer death”
    Snipers that have Darwin’s Danger Shield equipped: I am 4 parallel universes ahead of you.

    • @fedethegreat88
      @fedethegreat88 Před rokem +96

      No it's just for Demos using the Loch-n-load

    • @JackNick2000
      @JackNick2000 Před rokem +36

      Chargin’ Targe Hybrid Knights: This is where the fun begins

    • @theguywiththeoldds3896
      @theguywiththeoldds3896 Před rokem +12

      Snipers with Darwin's Danger Sheild: doesn't exist

    • @DesertThing
      @DesertThing Před rokem +1

      90 seconds of afterburn will kill every other class

    • @Aaa-vp6ug
      @Aaa-vp6ug Před 10 měsíci +4

      ⁠@@JackNick2000 so effectively 45 seconds of afterburn in terms of damage, might still get you killed

  • @Ian_Paneque
    @Ian_Paneque Před 11 měsíci +2

    We got it. And it has a seal

  • @HelixProto
    @HelixProto Před 10 měsíci +1

    this video is like an enigma, i have no idea why but i keep coming back to it

  • @BlueLionX88
    @BlueLionX88 Před 2 lety +333

    Boss: "Heavy, you're fired."
    Also Heavy: "So are you, Boss."
    Also Boss: *"Goddamnit."*

    • @ChaseMC215
      @ChaseMC215 Před 2 lety +7

      The boss would have been fired anyway for suggesting Heavy to update TF2

  • @ZestyJesus
    @ZestyJesus Před 2 lety +565

    >90 second afterburn penalty on engineer death
    I'm dying.
    Rarely does a video make me laugh all the way through, Jesus Christ, one of the funniest videos I've seen in a long time

  • @bestevie311
    @bestevie311 Před 7 měsíci +19

    5:15 i wish...

  • @julianseph842gamez5
    @julianseph842gamez5 Před rokem +18

    8:19 CEO: Heavy, you're fired...

  • @j-lo5079
    @j-lo5079 Před 2 lety +257

    I love how everytime it says "fixed player" they get hit with a wrench

  • @thewindwakinghero7423
    @thewindwakinghero7423 Před 2 lety +633

    4:25
    as an engineer main this is the exact way I would react

  • @ihave2cats459
    @ihave2cats459 Před 7 měsíci +2

    I LAUGHED DURING THE WHOLE VIDEO XD, lmao, it has been a while i dont laugh this much, thank you for the video.

  • @Megaton69420
    @Megaton69420 Před rokem +2

    Just want to say that I loved this video and you such a good job

  • @Sun-md8bw
    @Sun-md8bw Před 2 lety +329

    5:20 this could actually be a great addition

    • @EtanMarlin
      @EtanMarlin Před rokem +72

      for like april fools, it would be hilarious if taunts did that haha

    • @bugstuff2121
      @bugstuff2121 Před rokem

      @@EtanMarlin your a genius

    • @monke7919
      @monke7919 Před 11 měsíci

      I think would be funny if instead of just this specific one Taunt they made it something popular like the kazakov kick And made it so the self destination only happens to people joining in on the taunt. So that way someone could just go into the enemy base. Start doing the kick and let everyone blow themselves up trying to form a party.
      I may have gotten the name of the taunt wrong or I Mispelled the name of the taunt but I honestly don't care. I'm spelling using text to speech.

  • @chubbsreal
    @chubbsreal Před 2 lety +563

    4:25 his reaction is just the best

  • @kali12667
    @kali12667 Před 6 měsíci +2

    7:35 this is why I kept seeing snipers in my game

  • @thatmadengineer_5552
    @thatmadengineer_5552 Před 4 měsíci +2

    I like the fact that this video implies the VO guy is both in hell and in jail.

  • @ThePikminCaptain
    @ThePikminCaptain Před 2 lety +295

    3:49 Heavy mains after losing meet your match

  • @misterbrick4276
    @misterbrick4276 Před 2 lety +330

    3:51 you should’ve had Spy say “it could be you, it could be me”

  • @gamingmoth4542
    @gamingmoth4542 Před 13 dny +1

    I loved the "Removed the Spy from Liberty" and it shows Spy appearing in a jail cell.

  • @merucrypoison296
    @merucrypoison296 Před rokem +7

    Flammable/destructive maps would actually be really cool probably would be adding in tf3

  • @hamstreak5591
    @hamstreak5591 Před 2 lety +90

    They were tired of updating the localization files, so they gave us a weapon that allows the players to do it for them.

  • @davidron7850
    @davidron7850 Před 2 lety +1441

    7:22 did anyone else noticed that after the "fixed using scout" the scout is no longer in the mercs selection, amazing detail

  • @Explosions40
    @Explosions40 Před 8 měsíci +3

    "PYRO! YOU BITCH" is my favourite line

  • @BestOfNexusCo
    @BestOfNexusCo Před 11 měsíci +3

    your wish has been granted, welcome to the 2023 Summer Update!

  • @cromanticheer
    @cromanticheer Před rokem +396

    Brilliant!
    The whole framerate drop sequence is incredible. Especially Scout's shift from joy to terror at 1 FPS.

    • @statera5854
      @statera5854 Před rokem +9

      Also the PYRO you BECH

    • @iamwoke322
      @iamwoke322 Před 11 měsíci +13

      “What have I done?!”
      “Nooooo-“
      [spy.exe has stopped working]

    • @balala4641
      @balala4641 Před 4 měsíci

      if you replace "framerate" with "attention span in seconds" you get what's slowly happening right now

  • @GOKU_MUI527
    @GOKU_MUI527 Před rokem +506

    At 7:22 you see the attention to detail as there isn’t a scout in the character choosing since the one before that was that scout was “fixed” by not being able to use him

  • @ricekrispies4994
    @ricekrispies4994 Před 11 měsíci +3

    Is it weird that I kinda want flammable maps so I can re-enact meet the pyro

  • @kaysimpson
    @kaysimpson Před 11 měsíci +1

    Nicely done. Subbed